Hello my friend, I too have been diagnosed with borderline personality disorder. I understand 100% with the not being able to focus, you don't remember what you're doing half the day, it's draining. It's called dissociation. Dissociation happens when the body goes into "flight, fright or freeze" when you go into dissociation, your body is doing the freeze response. This happens under stress, or when your mind finds a stressful situation (which is a lot of things with borderline). I also have the paranoia under stressful situations, like someone is watching me or I feel like I'm 7 feet wide. I had to quit smoking weed because my delusions were getting severe. I hope you have found some counseling. DBT training was a help for me, as well as meditation. My heart is with you.
I think since men and women are inherently different, that it's only natural for us to have different experiences with the disorder. For example dr. Jordan Peterson, basically sums it up as what borderline personality disorder is for women manifest itself as antisocial disorder in men. That's just a thought I just thought I'd throw that out there because I would think that sent you a lot of things would be different because we experience our emotions as men and women completely differently women are a lot more emotional so if you can imagine men since they aren't that emotional it could be possible in my opinion that it's antisocial disorder which is usually male-dominant so and it's more aggressive so that sounds about right just from the nature of men and women I don't know if you can understand what I'm saying I have BPD and comorbid almost everything LOL
Hello, i don't really know what to tell you as tge first commentor, but i'm just very happy that there is a MALE on youtube talking about mental health and bpd specifically. I hope you are doing fine. Thank you.
I have BPD. I’m male. Environments, certain people and substances can create or magnify symptoms. You should not experiment with any more heavy drugs. They’ll make it worse and create addiction or a worse disorder.
I also have BPD and it's always nice to find other men who go through the same thing. I relate so much to what you say (talking to yourself, being in your mind a lot, self medicating with weed) i hope it gets easier for you. Thank you for speaking out.
Sorry you have to go through that I have bpd I don't hallucinate but the more stressed I get and the more emotional I become I find myself talking to myself out loud. Having whole conversations with myself. Don't be afraid to speak out I believe that men and women who have bpd have more in common than people think.
I find the weed just amplifies it to the extreme. It helps me in the very short term but so much worse in the long run. I had been heavily smoking weed for 20+ years and had to give it up. Also the stigma for male bpd is still very much a thing, I have been met with a lot of skepticism, even from friends and family. It took me 38 years to figure out what was going on, at first I thought maybe Asperger's but quickly moved onto bpd, took another 2 years to see that it was in fact quiet bpd.
I have bpd and am so physically end mentally exhausted from suicidal thoughts. Hating myself and feeling fucking hopeless. And the best part part is I can't talk to a single person about any of it.
I am having such an awful time trying to just get diagnosed for my issues, which I believe is BPD. I have been trying to almost 2 years and my life has fallen apart without any medical help.
“A person is, among all else, a material thing, easily torn and not easily mended.” “It wasn't only wickedness and scheming that made people unhappy, it was confusion and misunderstanding; above all, it was the failure to grasp the simple truth that other people are as real as you.”
Luke thank you so much for sharing. I also have borderline personality disorder, but many psychiatry just think that I'm bipolar. But I just don't feel the maniks like one does with my polar disorder. I feel the emotional regulation the boobs which change the impulsive habits and working and focusing and remembering is so hard it's kind of embarrassing. I really struggle with keeping stable relationships as well and sometimes I don't understand why because I'm a nice person. I really respect that you took the time to make this Video. I know that it's not easy to talk about these things and I think you're really brave For making this video and in English !! I like when you mention that we are not alone, it's very comforting. Have a great day!!!
thank you for sharing your experience! i also have bpd but i end up having conversations with myself either in my head or out loud, and sometimes when i realize i’m doing it i get really annoyed because sometimes people just hear me mumbling to myself. i’ve never had any hallucinations though. hope you are well!
I was recently diagnosed with bpd. For a lot of my life I was misdiagnosed with just regular aniexty/depression, or with bipolar. Nothing ever helped me, and I never shared many of the same symptoms that people with bipolar have. It's been such a hard, traumatic life. Thank you for sharing your story, it makes me feel less alone
hi! I find it strange you got the borderline diagnosis. Its rather sounds like schizophrenia. I also got borderline, but i dont have any hallucinations, and i dont hear any voices, only I have some psychotic symptoms/periods like believing i am under observation or I am constantly making theories to prove my beliefs. (and these seems real at the moment but usually way far from reality). But most often I have problems controlling my anger and moods. Black and white thinking and mood swing is a borderline symptom but i havent heared that hearing voices or dellusions would be.
@@trippstephens6934 Pretty good actually, I dont smoke weed and eat a lot of vegetables and fruit to help the intestinal bacteria. It is slowly getting better :) thank you for asking
Being open, honest and talking about it is probably really good too and leads the way for others, particularly men with bpd to follow this positive example
My friend, there are a lot of men with BPD but they don't know it or they're misdiagnosed as Bipolar. Thank-you for sharing your experience with the world. ❤
I think my fiance has BPD traits--as well as his diagnosed TBI and PTSD. (I'm not sure if you would qualify for a diagnosis of mixed personality disorder.) This can be very challenging. On the one hand he's brilliant, on the other hand in men BPD traits tend to manifest as anger and narcissistic Tendencies. This is true of him. When he's not engaging in these things he's very loving and empathetic and insightful and a deep person, also playful and wonderfully creative. But the TBI (traumatic brain injury), PTSD, and the Borderline traits, plus narcissistic tendencies make it very hard. Thankfully he responded to my urging him to get back on medication and find more relevant and effective therapy. But it's three steps forward then one alarming big step back. Were it not for the effective medication and the very great therapist he found, our relationship probably wouldn't have survived, which would have been tragic, because we love each other very dearly.
I’m in a very simular situation with my boyfriend, can I ask you what therapy and medication your husband gets? We’re kinda stuck here and with a baby on the way I don’t know what to do anymore
When I was finally diagnosed, after nine years misdiagnosed with severe depression, bipolar disorder as well, I felt very suicidal and went to hospital. There I did lots of tests and they finally told me about Borderline Disorder. What I really feel now, after twenty years, is that I have survived although my life is full of fears. Sometimes agoraphobia, sometimes I feel afraid of people of other races ( I am white, and we have here in Spain many migrants from almost everywhere). People think I am a racist, muy I am not. It is just an inner deep fear that I cannot control and ir affects my life.
@@LukePiala I do. And there are moments when I feel better, and moments when I feel down.Moments, days, seasons... These days I am feeling completely like in a rollercoaster. Please do not use drugs, I mean weed and all that stuff cause It is not the way to manage the illnes. Nowadays there is not a magical pill that you take and suddenly you feel better. But try to live as healthy as you can ( I know it is difficult nowadays with the pandemic), and try to keep busy and find ways to stay focused.
I'm in recovery for over 20 years. If I was advising myself, I would say the primary goal would be to remove my sMother from my life completely. If I'm not able to do that then do the work I need to do to make that happen. Make that the priority of my life. Learning to be independent from them (parents) is the goal. The basic idea is that they invalidated me at such a young age that I couldn't grow so I keep going back to them because the alternative of leaving and raising myself was too much to handle. Now, as an adult, the only solution is to permanently leave them and become my own parent.
I also have intence absesive racing thoughts. Day dreaming. Very hard to keep a job because of intence mood swings I get really quiet an the emotions start . I think I got bpd also. I disappear from every one .and shut down loose jobs regularly. Sometimes I feel like an alien 👽. I can socialize but not to much I get overwhelmed sometimes. Life is Very lonely also.
Hey bro I'm in the states And I too have BPD. IVE seen a couple Facebook groups about it and they're mostly women. Maybe men are more afraid to talk about it becUse of the whole "hysterical woman" bro g crazy amd men being stoic sterotype. Anyway I dissociate alot I call it "playing" because I jump into a fantasy world and just stay there all day thinking up scenarios where I'm the hero or rehaving arguments in my head Nd winning them. I relate to you on alot of stuff. I self medicate with Kratom. I see people was angels or demons if they matter to me at all. I struggle with isolation and INTENSE social anxiety. Anyway so yeah. This vid was good shit. You should make more
There is a book you might like to read. It is not about BPD, it is about trauma, but it explains many very helpful mental health concepts that might help you make sense of your experience. It is not a scholarly book, it is easy to read, and it approaches what it speaks about from a place of empathy, and uses the experiences of individuals the author has worked with. The book is The Body Keeps The Score, by Bessel van der Kolk (a psychiatrist specialized in trauma). Everyone should read that book.
Hallucinations is big for me now I hear voices too of people in my life from my past experience. I try to distinguish between the past and the present but I keep struggling. And everytime I fully understand the present I start to get scared and anxiety. I spewed my food out at the mall.
I've bin diagnosed with bpd. I'm a Male from uk in hastings 41years old only just bin diagnosed tho. So was relieved when I new I wasnt alone in this world. And I'm being diagnosed with a.d.h.d and p.d.s.d. but my hole lifes bin a massive struggle and I always new I was different from my mates. And my aggression growing up. And even now its frew the roof over something so silly. But to me its alot more. And I think I have rem disorder. As I create my dreams to reality. I fight in my dreams then I've woken up and carried the fight on with my partner. And then I realized who I've just hit. And I'm distraught coz shes my favourite person too..excuse my writing. I'm dyslexic too. I smoke weed to keep me leveled out frew the day. Cost me a 5r a j.lol .5 in a joint. Much love to my bpd people's! Your not alone anymore....👊🤪👍
Thank you very much indeed for your candid account of your difficulties and also for rightfully mentioning the relevance of previous psychotropic drug use that often precedes the symptoms you describe. Q. If they are truly psychotic departures from reality as you know it; how are you cognisant / aware of this? As a MH professional it would be really helpful to obtain some further anecdotal evidence. Thanks in advance
Of course I wouldnt be able to spot delusions but I can spot halucinations just as you can tell you were dreaming when you wake up. I notice what it was when it ends. I hope that helps :-)
You make a connection between what you call psychotic symptoms and drug use. Interestingly, all the drugs you mention are uppers, not downers. People with psychotic disorders tend to use uppers a lot, I don't necessarily mean on a daily basis but I do mean rather regularly. Most people would think that this drug use triggers the so-called psychotic symptoms, and while there is certainly an element of truth to that, what I find people might be overlooking is that (based on my experience of people with diagnosed conditions that have a psychotic component) using uppers is a way for such people to distance themselves from those same symptoms momentarily. I know a person with schizophrenia who regularly uses MDMA. He hears voices. He knows that the voices are due to his disorder. He has learnt to live with the voices, he hears them but doesn't listen to what they have to say. But he does have this constant murmuring in his head, and although it doesn't drive him insane, he would like the voices to shut up for a while. When he does MDMA, he doesn't stop hearing the voices, but he does get to focus on the high, which makes the voices easier to bear. No, I am not saying this is the correct way to deal with the issue, and he might be making the voices worse in the long run through his drug use. I just wanted to call attention to the fact that this link between use of uppers and psychotic symptoms is more of a chicken-or-egg question than it might seem. And although I am not convinced that the use of uppers is a solution, I also don't judge it, because I have an open enough mind to admit that it really might be helpful to that person to be doing this. We don't know what we don't know, and therapeutic use of uppers by people with psychotic disorders has not yet been investigated, and it will be a while before we get to it given all the preoccupations people, including researchers, have about giving mind-altering substances to people who already hallucinate without using any drugs.
Sending you love man. I wish that I had more borderline male friends for some really inappropriate impulsive non-abandonment bromance. And cuddles. Straight cuddles. Not gay. And straight emotional bonding. Not gay. And hanging out shirtless.
Be very careful with synthetic drugs. They greatly alter hormonal balance, so when you are on them, they can really be helpful, but once you lose the high, they tend to have the opposite effect. This is especially true of LSD and MDMA. If you are going to use these, plan ahead, and make sure you have tools available to you to compensate for the effect of coming down (other than more drugs). The depressant side effect of MDMA can last for days.
@@LukePiala f A good psychotherapist is the best key for the solution imagine my case starts with epilepsy then bipolar disorder and then borderline i read a lot to fight it on the floor 8 months every night on the floor too much cry best wishes dude
There are not many men who speak up about their BPD but there are as many men who have this disorder as there are women. We fail to identify them as such because men deal with things differently and so many men with BPD look like something else than a person with BPD. And maybe that's part of why we don't hear from men with BPD much: they are flying under the radar and don't even know that they have this disorder (and often live with other diagnoses that don't belong).
Luke hello, I'm Jack. I'd really like to speak with you if you'd be willing to exchange information. I see you made this video a year ago, I'm glad I found it. I have BPD, and drug induced psychosis. My life doesn't make any sense at all, totally random jobs, odd behavior and desires. I thought we maybe could be friends or "pen pals" or something.
Thank you for sharing..I am a woman with very codependent personality just learning to set boundaries. Can I ask you what your interpersonal relationships are like? I am attempting to tonight with my husband and father of our children after 11 years. He was diagnosed with BPD in 2009 but has done nothing but self medicate for all of those years. He is about 3 months clean now but life is hard for him. We are going slowly so not to injure ourselves. Thank you again for your courage..
It depends on multiple things. Your relationship is very close so you cant really hide stuff from each other. The only solution is getting better one step at a time. Now Im in much better place and my relationships are too as a result 🙂 what tipe of self-medication did he use? If its weed it would be hard but worth it to quit. - my 2 cents
@@LukePiala hes been on meth for about 10 years along with the pot..I'm trying to be patient as I know hes hurting. He has 'always struggled with the truth'..that was more than anything that ended our marriage for me..😪
@@sandyzappa840 Thats some heavy stuff, in that case- sticking to pot would be much healthier. We cant change other people until they agree, are ready. I dont know how to help you but wish you all the best in your life. When there are clouds, eventually sun will show up 🙂
I agree, doing mushrooms can be triggering to the psychology of the person, I had OCD and I starting experiencing BPD after that from past trauma because too much of the subconscious comes up. I suggest that you quit weed and quit ALL drugs. There is hope for sure!! Therapy and giving my life to Jesus Christ helped me heal for good. ❤️🙏🏽
Get a second opinion, illusions/hallucinations aren’t symptomatic of borderline personality disorder, more likely to be bipolar’s, schizophrenia or schizoaffective disorder (a mixture of bipolar and schizophrenia). These disorders can be easily treated with medication and psychotherapy if diagnosed correctly. Wish you all the best
Feelings of emptiness usually comes from lack of knowledge and lack of true connection with your core being, your connection to God. if you can gain that experience, and uncover your true presence then you can gain focus on that is harder times, but for many people it can be a real struggle. Thank you for speaking out about this. God bless you and I hope you find your path to uncover your true presence.
Definetly psychosis, but I dont have delusions and the voices in my head got almost quiet after stopping smoking cannabis. Bpd with drug induced psychosis
Hello my friend, I too have been diagnosed with borderline personality disorder. I understand 100% with the not being able to focus, you don't remember what you're doing half the day, it's draining. It's called dissociation. Dissociation happens when the body goes into "flight, fright or freeze" when you go into dissociation, your body is doing the freeze response. This happens under stress, or when your mind finds a stressful situation (which is a lot of things with borderline). I also have the paranoia under stressful situations, like someone is watching me or I feel like I'm 7 feet wide. I had to quit smoking weed because my delusions were getting severe.
I hope you have found some counseling. DBT training was a help for me, as well as meditation.
My heart is with you.
I have this .
I have BPD and was told it's a female dominant disorder. I disagree. There are just as many males suffering silently. Thank you for speaking up.
I think since men and women are inherently different, that it's only natural for us to have different experiences with the disorder. For example dr. Jordan Peterson, basically sums it up as what borderline personality disorder is for women manifest itself as antisocial disorder in men. That's just a thought I just thought I'd throw that out there because I would think that sent you a lot of things would be different because we experience our emotions as men and women completely differently women are a lot more emotional so if you can imagine men since they aren't that emotional it could be possible in my opinion that it's antisocial disorder which is usually male-dominant so and it's more aggressive so that sounds about right just from the nature of men and women I don't know if you can understand what I'm saying I have BPD and comorbid almost everything LOL
Hello, i don't really know what to tell you as tge first commentor, but i'm just very happy that there is a MALE on youtube talking about mental health and bpd specifically. I hope you are doing fine. Thank you.
I have BPD. I’m male. Environments, certain people and substances can create or magnify symptoms. You should not experiment with any more heavy drugs. They’ll make it worse and create addiction or a worse disorder.
Yes you are right. Thats why I dont smoke, dont do drugs and rarely drink now. Have a great day :)
I also have BPD and it's always nice to find other men who go through the same thing. I relate so much to what you say (talking to yourself, being in your mind a lot, self medicating with weed) i hope it gets easier for you. Thank you for speaking out.
Sorry you have to go through that I have bpd I don't hallucinate but the more stressed I get and the more emotional I become I find myself talking to myself out loud. Having whole conversations with myself. Don't be afraid to speak out I believe that men and women who have bpd have more in common than people think.
Hi Lukas .. I think it’s very courageous of you by sharing your story .. please keep on going :)
I find the weed just amplifies it to the extreme. It helps me in the very short term but so much worse in the long run. I had been heavily smoking weed for 20+ years and had to give it up. Also the stigma for male bpd is still very much a thing, I have been met with a lot of skepticism, even from friends and family. It took me 38 years to figure out what was going on, at first I thought maybe Asperger's but quickly moved onto bpd, took another 2 years to see that it was in fact quiet bpd.
I also agree it is so courageous of you to share your story!!!
Sweet, I found another brother with BPD! RUclips is truly a magical place.
I have bpd and am so physically end mentally exhausted from suicidal thoughts. Hating myself and feeling fucking hopeless. And the best part part is I can't talk to a single person about any of it.
I hear you. Its really hard because its happening again and again. Im sure you can find people you can talk to. Im available if you want 🙂
I am having such an awful time trying to just get diagnosed for my issues, which I believe is BPD. I have been trying to almost 2 years and my life has fallen apart without any medical help.
I really appreciate your honesty. Admitting you have a problem is the first step to getting better. Keep doing therapy. I wish you well.
“A person is, among all else, a material thing, easily torn and not easily mended.” “It wasn't only wickedness and scheming that made people unhappy, it was confusion and misunderstanding; above all, it was the failure to grasp the simple truth that other people are as real as you.”
Luke thank you so much for sharing. I also have borderline personality disorder, but many psychiatry just think that I'm bipolar. But I just don't feel the maniks like one does with my polar disorder. I feel the emotional regulation the boobs which change the impulsive habits and working and focusing and remembering is so hard it's kind of embarrassing. I really struggle with keeping stable relationships as well and sometimes I don't understand why because I'm a nice person. I really respect that you took the time to make this Video. I know that it's not easy to talk about these things and I think you're really brave For making this video and in English !! I like when you mention that we are not alone, it's very comforting. Have a great day!!!
thank you for sharing your experience! i also have bpd but i end up having conversations with myself either in my head or out loud, and sometimes when i realize i’m doing it i get really annoyed because sometimes people just hear me mumbling to myself. i’ve never had any hallucinations though. hope you are well!
Well done Lucas , you did great , it's not shame to admit it, it's brave and I take my hat of for you .
I was recently diagnosed with bpd. For a lot of my life I was misdiagnosed with just regular aniexty/depression, or with bipolar. Nothing ever helped me, and I never shared many of the same symptoms that people with bipolar have. It's been such a hard, traumatic life. Thank you for sharing your story, it makes me feel less alone
You carry on doing what you do , talk about that good, making the people aware of it.
hi! I find it strange you got the borderline diagnosis. Its rather sounds like schizophrenia. I also got borderline, but i dont have any hallucinations, and i dont hear any voices, only I have some psychotic symptoms/periods like believing i am under observation or I am constantly making theories to prove my beliefs. (and these seems real at the moment but usually way far from reality). But most often I have problems controlling my anger and moods. Black and white thinking and mood swing is a borderline symptom but i havent heared that hearing voices or dellusions would be.
I agree. The focus problems sound like a distraction by the schizophrenia. I think he needs to get a second opinion.
@@trippstephens6934 Thank you for your advice, I will
@@LukePiala how you doing with everything bro?
@@trippstephens6934 Pretty good actually, I dont smoke weed and eat a lot of vegetables and fruit to help the intestinal bacteria. It is slowly getting better :) thank you for asking
@@trippstephens6934 That labile attention and forgetting most of the stuff is actually a sign of dissociaton which is common in BDP.
Being open, honest and talking about it is probably really good too and leads the way for others, particularly men with bpd to follow this positive example
My friend, there are a lot of men with BPD but they don't know it or they're misdiagnosed as Bipolar. Thank-you for sharing your experience with the world. ❤
I think my fiance has BPD traits--as well as his diagnosed TBI and PTSD. (I'm not sure if you would qualify for a diagnosis of mixed personality disorder.)
This can be very challenging. On the one hand he's brilliant, on the other hand in men BPD traits tend to manifest as anger and narcissistic Tendencies. This is true of him.
When he's not engaging in these things he's very loving and empathetic and insightful and a deep person, also playful and wonderfully creative.
But the TBI (traumatic brain injury), PTSD, and the Borderline traits, plus narcissistic tendencies make it very hard. Thankfully he responded to my urging him to get back on medication and find more relevant and effective therapy. But it's three steps forward then one alarming big step back. Were it not for the effective medication and the very great therapist he found, our relationship probably wouldn't have survived, which would have been tragic, because we love each other very dearly.
Thank you for sharing, it can be challenging to diagnose and especially treat
I’m in a very simular situation with my boyfriend, can I ask you what therapy and medication your husband gets? We’re kinda stuck here and with a baby on the way I don’t know what to do anymore
When I was finally diagnosed, after nine years misdiagnosed with severe depression, bipolar disorder as well, I felt very suicidal and went to hospital. There I did lots of tests and they finally told me about Borderline Disorder.
What I really feel now, after twenty years, is that I have survived although my life is full of fears.
Sometimes agoraphobia, sometimes I feel afraid of people of other races ( I am white, and we have here in Spain many migrants from almost everywhere).
People think I am a racist, muy I am not. It is just an inner deep fear that I cannot control and ir affects my life.
Thank you for sharing. At least you now know what it is
@@LukePiala I do. And there are moments when I feel better, and moments when I feel down.Moments, days, seasons...
These days I am feeling completely like in a rollercoaster.
Please do not use drugs, I mean weed and all that stuff cause It is not the way to manage the illnes.
Nowadays there is not a magical pill that you take and suddenly you feel better. But try to live as healthy as you can ( I know it is difficult nowadays with the pandemic), and try to keep busy and find ways to stay focused.
@@LOLAPLEASE Thanx for good advice. Thats what I do now, no smoking weed. Have a good day :)
@@LukePiala Good for you
I'm in recovery for over 20 years. If I was advising myself, I would say the primary goal would be to remove my sMother from my life completely. If I'm not able to do that then do the work I need to do to make that happen. Make that the priority of my life. Learning to be independent from them (parents) is the goal. The basic idea is that they invalidated me at such a young age that I couldn't grow so I keep going back to them because the alternative of leaving and raising myself was too much to handle. Now, as an adult, the only solution is to permanently leave them and become my own parent.
I also have intence absesive racing thoughts. Day dreaming. Very hard to keep a job because of intence mood swings I get really quiet an the emotions start . I think I got bpd also. I disappear from every one .and shut down loose jobs regularly. Sometimes I feel like an alien 👽. I can socialize but not to much I get overwhelmed sometimes. Life is Very lonely also.
Exactly like you, I cant keep a job and often withdraw from people. Takes energy to socialize
I was diagnosed last year. Alot of what you say is true. I have arguments with people in my head for things they did years ago.
I'm so incredibly proud of you 👏
Hey bro I'm in the states And I too have BPD. IVE seen a couple Facebook groups about it and they're mostly women. Maybe men are more afraid to talk about it becUse of the whole "hysterical woman" bro g crazy amd men being stoic sterotype. Anyway I dissociate alot I call it "playing" because I jump into a fantasy world and just stay there all day thinking up scenarios where I'm the hero or rehaving arguments in my head Nd winning them. I relate to you on alot of stuff. I self medicate with Kratom. I see people was angels or demons if they matter to me at all. I struggle with isolation and INTENSE social anxiety. Anyway so yeah. This vid was good shit. You should make more
Thank you for sharing Brian. Very relatable with replaying situations and arguments I wish you all the best brother ✌😎
There is a book you might like to read. It is not about BPD, it is about trauma, but it explains many very helpful mental health concepts that might help you make sense of your experience. It is not a scholarly book, it is easy to read, and it approaches what it speaks about from a place of empathy, and uses the experiences of individuals the author has worked with.
The book is The Body Keeps The Score, by Bessel van der Kolk (a psychiatrist specialized in trauma). Everyone should read that book.
Hallucinations is big for me now I hear voices too of people in my life from my past experience. I try to distinguish between the past and the present but I keep struggling. And everytime I fully understand the present I start to get scared and anxiety. I spewed my food out at the mall.
I've bin diagnosed with bpd. I'm a Male from uk in hastings 41years old only just bin diagnosed tho. So was relieved when I new I wasnt alone in this world. And I'm being diagnosed with a.d.h.d and p.d.s.d. but my hole lifes bin a massive struggle and I always new I was different from my mates. And my aggression growing up. And even now its frew the roof over something so silly. But to me its alot more. And I think I have rem disorder. As I create my dreams to reality. I fight in my dreams then I've woken up and carried the fight on with my partner. And then I realized who I've just hit. And I'm distraught coz shes my favourite person too..excuse my writing. I'm dyslexic too. I smoke weed to keep me leveled out frew the day. Cost me a 5r a j.lol .5 in a joint. Much love to my bpd people's! Your not alone anymore....👊🤪👍
I'd love to hear an update on how you are doing!
I do have it on my channel :-)
ruclips.net/video/Oc24t-igFds/видео.html
Thank you very much indeed for your candid account of your difficulties and also for rightfully mentioning the relevance of previous psychotropic drug use that often precedes the symptoms you describe.
Q. If they are truly psychotic departures from reality as you know it; how are you cognisant / aware of this?
As a MH professional it would be really helpful to obtain some further anecdotal evidence. Thanks in advance
Of course I wouldnt be able to spot delusions but I can spot halucinations just as you can tell you were dreaming when you wake up. I notice what it was when it ends. I hope that helps :-)
You make a connection between what you call psychotic symptoms and drug use. Interestingly, all the drugs you mention are uppers, not downers. People with psychotic disorders tend to use uppers a lot, I don't necessarily mean on a daily basis but I do mean rather regularly. Most people would think that this drug use triggers the so-called psychotic symptoms, and while there is certainly an element of truth to that, what I find people might be overlooking is that (based on my experience of people with diagnosed conditions that have a psychotic component) using uppers is a way for such people to distance themselves from those same symptoms momentarily. I know a person with schizophrenia who regularly uses MDMA. He hears voices. He knows that the voices are due to his disorder. He has learnt to live with the voices, he hears them but doesn't listen to what they have to say. But he does have this constant murmuring in his head, and although it doesn't drive him insane, he would like the voices to shut up for a while. When he does MDMA, he doesn't stop hearing the voices, but he does get to focus on the high, which makes the voices easier to bear. No, I am not saying this is the correct way to deal with the issue, and he might be making the voices worse in the long run through his drug use. I just wanted to call attention to the fact that this link between use of uppers and psychotic symptoms is more of a chicken-or-egg question than it might seem. And although I am not convinced that the use of uppers is a solution, I also don't judge it, because I have an open enough mind to admit that it really might be helpful to that person to be doing this. We don't know what we don't know, and therapeutic use of uppers by people with psychotic disorders has not yet been investigated, and it will be a while before we get to it given all the preoccupations people, including researchers, have about giving mind-altering substances to people who already hallucinate without using any drugs.
Sending you love man. I wish that I had more borderline male friends for some really inappropriate impulsive non-abandonment bromance. And cuddles. Straight cuddles. Not gay. And straight emotional bonding. Not gay. And hanging out shirtless.
Hanging out shirtless 😂 you are funny my man
Same here I’m a borderline women i have the same symptoms.. feeling detached from reality i experience it alot
I am also a man with BPD. It feels like there is always a part of me screaming "get fucked" at me. Everyday. Even the good ones.
Be very careful with synthetic drugs. They greatly alter hormonal balance, so when you are on them, they can really be helpful, but once you lose the high, they tend to have the opposite effect. This is especially true of LSD and MDMA. If you are going to use these, plan ahead, and make sure you have tools available to you to compensate for the effect of coming down (other than more drugs). The depressant side effect of MDMA can last for days.
Im in recovery and its possible dude stay strong
Thank you 👍
@@LukePiala f
A good psychotherapist is the best key for the solution imagine my case starts with epilepsy then bipolar disorder and then borderline i read a lot to fight it on the floor 8 months every night on the floor too much cry best wishes dude
@@panospap5867 Best wishes for you as well :)
Representing for the men...this is what we need to understand more.
Be brave keeping it real
There are not many men who speak up about their BPD but there are as many men who have this disorder as there are women. We fail to identify them as such because men deal with things differently and so many men with BPD look like something else than a person with BPD. And maybe that's part of why we don't hear from men with BPD much: they are flying under the radar and don't even know that they have this disorder (and often live with other diagnoses that don't belong).
Luke hello, I'm Jack. I'd really like to speak with you if you'd be willing to exchange information. I see you made this video a year ago, I'm glad I found it. I have BPD, and drug induced psychosis. My life doesn't make any sense at all, totally random jobs, odd behavior and desires. I thought we maybe could be friends or "pen pals" or something.
Hello Jack, yes I would be glad if we will. My Facebook is Lukas Piala (photo in red shirt with guitar). My email is : lukas.piala@gmail.con
Thank you for sharing..I am a woman with very codependent personality just learning to set boundaries. Can I ask you what your interpersonal relationships are like? I am attempting to tonight with my husband and father of our children after 11 years. He was diagnosed with BPD in 2009 but has done nothing but self medicate for all of those years. He is about 3 months clean now but life is hard for him. We are going slowly so not to injure ourselves. Thank you again for your courage..
It depends on multiple things. Your relationship is very close so you cant really hide stuff from each other. The only solution is getting better one step at a time. Now Im in much better place and my relationships are too as a result 🙂 what tipe of self-medication did he use? If its weed it would be hard but worth it to quit. - my 2 cents
@@LukePiala hes been on meth for about 10 years along with the pot..I'm trying to be patient as I know hes hurting. He has 'always struggled with the truth'..that was more than anything that ended our marriage for me..😪
@@sandyzappa840 Thats some heavy stuff, in that case- sticking to pot would be much healthier. We cant change other people until they agree, are ready. I dont know how to help you but wish you all the best in your life. When there are clouds, eventually sun will show up 🙂
I have the exact same symptoms you have but I didn't think they were also classed under BPD.
What kind of diagnosis did they give you?
Your not alone ,
I agree, doing mushrooms can be triggering to the psychology of the person, I had OCD and I starting experiencing BPD after that from past trauma because too much of the subconscious comes up. I suggest that you quit weed and quit ALL drugs. There is hope for sure!! Therapy and giving my life to Jesus Christ helped me heal for good. ❤️🙏🏽
You are very handsome 😄
Thank you :-)
Yessss
Why you have to say that shit. It's inappropriate
I found my people.
Here is the one more😊
Sounds more like schizophrenia brother.
Get a second opinion, illusions/hallucinations aren’t symptomatic of borderline personality disorder, more likely to be bipolar’s, schizophrenia or schizoaffective disorder (a mixture of bipolar and schizophrenia). These disorders can be easily treated with medication and psychotherapy if diagnosed correctly. Wish you all the best
Hallucinations can happen with bpd
You can have psychotic symptoms and paranoia too with BPD or traits of something else that can be a co-symptom
Bipolar disorder is often comorbid with NPD, BPD and other personality disorders.
@@AW-dt8ct of course, but hallucinations aren’t a symptom of personality disorders.
What about cPTSD?
I could also have that, I dont know. Do you have experience with it?
@@LukePiala ruclips.net/p/PLpvbEN3KkqoLNLNIAVM0ks8nU3fSKaFV0
mashrooms
Feelings of emptiness usually comes from lack of knowledge and lack of true connection with your core being, your connection to God. if you can gain that experience, and uncover your true presence then you can gain focus on that is harder times, but for many people it can be a real struggle. Thank you for speaking out about this. God bless you and I hope you find your path to uncover your true presence.
🤗😚
I would run away from you
Thanx for being honest, have a wonderful day
This sounds more like Schizophrenia to me.
Definetly psychosis, but I dont have delusions and the voices in my head got almost quiet after stopping smoking cannabis. Bpd with drug induced psychosis
U stuck!!
Do not do weed that's bad news ☺