Going to the gym in what's essentially underwear for attention, secretly filming men glancing in their direction, then posting it online, accusing the men of wrongdoing - for more attention.
I'm glad you mentioned Peterson. I once saw him say that women put people into one of 3 categories: 1. Infant 2. Caregiver(s) of Infants 3. Threat. This blew my mind because I see it everywhere. The infant doesn't necessarily have to be an actual infant but any person or group of people perceived as weak or at a disadvantage like maybe seniors or minority groups. The latest of which is the LGBTQs. The women that do this stuff have placed themselves in the role of caregiver of infant and this gives them an ego boost, power, and a way to virtue signal. They also use this to control the behaviors of others especially men, who, if they don't go along with the caregiver of infants rules are run off and accused of being a threat. Far too many men cave in to this an end up acting like the white knight when really they have just become a trained dog of the caregiver of infants. And if a man rejects this position the woman quickly turns herself into the infant/victim and calls in higher authorities to act as caregiver of infant and take that man away or run him off. And the really wild part about this is that if you explicitly told and expected these women to be the caregivers of infants, they would rebel and condemn the audacity of trying to "force her" into some "traditional patriarchal gender role". But when you just watch what they do, they appear to desperately want to be the caregivers of infants. And one more tool that a lot of women use is plausible deniability to avoid accountability. But I've said enough. Thanks for this video. It's about time women started speaking out and calling out the toxic behaviors of other women because they are not going to listen to a man discuss any of this. He instantly becomes the threat. They tried this with Jordan Peterson. He survived it but what chance does the average man have at standing up to the woke mob?
Thank you for this comment. You hit the nail on the head. There are so many contradictions in modern feminism, it makes me want to pull my hair out. Women have been told we can have it all, but we can't. We don't have unlimited time and so therefore, sacrifices must be made. Jordan Peterson talks a lot about making the right kind of sacrifices. If women want a lucrative career, they must sacrifice spending time taking care of children, but that urge to nurture becomes sublimated and can turn into abuse towards men and other women. I think it's time for women to wake up and realize that regret is one hell of a deterrent.
Be careful with Jordan Peterson. Even if he says some good advices, a lot of what he says is rooted in a political agenda and have been debunked multiple times. An example of this is the lobster. I advise to double check every person that become millionnaire while pushing the agenda of the rich.
I'm glad that this was in my recommends and I subscribed. Yours is the first treatment of Toxic Femininity that I have seen that did not try to present it as just a byproduct of Toxic Masculinity but rather discussed it as something that is capable of existing on it's own, entirely separate from Toxic Masculinity. Over the years, I have frequently seen women behave horribly to other women, as have nearly all men who are paying attention. These women are typically awful to men as well, but they use an entirely separate 'toolkit' for that. Women's toxic behavior towards other women looks very different from their toxic behavior towards men. Where Feminism comes into the mix, the issue is that we are told that it is for all women yet I have seen women be treated badly within Feminist circles simply because of a difference of opinion on certain issues, as if a woman no longer qualifies as a woman simply for thinking differently. The first time that I saw this was when I was in college. I knew one couple who were devout Christians and were planning to get married right after graduation. One semester, she decided to enroll in a Women's Studies 101 class to fulfill either a Social Sciences or Humanities elective that she needed. She said at the time that she thought that would be an interesting way to fulfill that elective requirement, sitting in a room with other women discussing the history of women and that she was looking forward to it. Fast forward a few months to the end of that semester. He and I are sitting together laughing as she described in graphic detail just how thrilled she was to be finished with that class and how horrible it was! She said that, as a woman who was heterosexual, Christian, politically moderate on most issues and planning to get married after college that she was frequently singled out and treated with hostility by the other students in the class and on a couple of occasions even by the professor! He and I raised our fists in the air and said, "Solidarity sister!" That didn't go over well...
Isn't it funny how feminism is supposed to be good for women when in reality it's the complete opposite? Feminists say they care about women's issues and then turn around and torment women who don't think like they do. In academia, the minds of young women are turned against men and pumped full of lies. I appreciate your comment, and it's disappointing to hear what happened to your friend in that women's studies class. I hope the lies of feminism become exposed and that women will one day wake up.
That's just a shitty learning environment for any1, whether they're conservative traditional housewives or anarcho-feminist protesters with facial piercings and blond dreadlocks (just a cliche i know)
Top notch video again. Liked and subscribed. The divine feminine and masculine. Yes what is missing in the discourse is an understanding of the metaphysical and archetypal ground. That’s why everyone is completely confused and arguing from a groundless place. There is polarity, there are archetypes in the psyche we moderns have lost.
Feminism should be called Manism! Spot on I think and this video was another great one and it's the second of yours I've watched. So incredible to see even the definition of toxic femininity point a subtle finger back to it actually being about toxic men for condemning women to such passive characteristics. There, once again, we can see the deep extent of gynocentrism that runs through our society which is never spoken about or admitted especially by women. To admit to being the protected species with the intolerable. Thank you and I think you are a great contribution to the space. Thank you so much for your compassion and understanding towards men and for being so brave to speak truthfully about these issues🙏🏼
I think one of the most difficult things of being a good parent is gradually letting your children be more independent and allow them to develop self reliance. I think some parents struggle with that as it goes against their urge to protect their children
That’s the reason why fathers are necessary. Fathers discipline their wives to let their children experience the world. Single mothers fail in that regard miserably. That is one of the reasons why fathers AND mothers are necessary.
This video hit all the marks! Thank you! Having traditional imigrant parents, I had a hard time understanding why my mom implied on teaching me about femininity and gender roles but I'm so glad that's my upbringing. I was able to catch up to the sabotage of feminism and capitalism especially when I experienced the harms of hookup culture and noticed the odd hate for feminine qualities. I found that I enjoyed falling into more traditional gender rolls, wanted a family and to prioritize raising my children well more than a career. I still have a degree and I know that I'm competent in many ways but I have no desire to compete with men.
Omg, THANK YOU! I've been saying this for years now! I feel so vindicated! Thank you so much for making this! I've been arguing about this very stuff and making these very points with a friend of mine! its insane! I'm not crazy! 🙏
I had a few good decades. I feel sorry for young guys today, now women don’t even think they have to try. Now I invest my energies elsewhere and live alone, it’s nice to see the results pay off and to live without the chaos.
Ok. I finally get it now. Men actually behaving like men as nature intended = to be discouraged. Women behaving like men = greatly encouraged. Makes perfect sense.
It's great that you're honest about the *natural traits* of both men & women. I'm glad you mentioned Louise Perry as well as the toxic politics of current feminism. ☠
Why aren't you out here fishing for compliments and seeking validation from strangers? Oh, that's right. You have content which is actually important and needing to be said.
One thing that often gets overlooked is that while men are physically stronger, women are generally more robust than men; living longer and healthier lives (less prone to illness)
15:11 "... the ideology of feminism prevailed which told women and girls that in order to be equal women needed to start having sex like men treating it like any other social interaction. Since that time sexual expectations have changed under the pretense that there are no longer consequences of having sex even though in reality that's not true. In today's society, a lot of young girls and women think their virginity is a burden that they must get rid of because they want to fit in with their peers. The problem is that sex is now cheap and easy to get and the group that suffers from this state of affairs is women." Actually, the bigger loser is the men who never recieved that sex anyway, but decided to "play by the rules". Societal ridicule for them and their situation is off the charts. Sex is not "cheap and easy to get" for all men ... this is a major "red pill" point. 15:54 "... women have lost their only real power in the world." The fact that you quoted it as a "power" speaks to this loss by those men. It's one of the consequences of having that sex that isn't being mentioned.
If a man and a woman go on a first date, and they have sex, and the man never speaks to her again, that's considered a win for the man, but it's a painful loss for the woman.
@erinruhl5377 A lot of modern feminist thinking is to erase the pain of any loss for that woman - basically, to redefine "loss" to "gain". And that's a lot of what your video goes over, when you say her friends are talking her into getting rid of her virginity and/or sleep around. My argument is not about the man in your scenario, it's about another man *following* that scenario - the one who dates her next or who dates her when she decides to "settle down", while he was either struggling to date at all and was being "good" in not pressing for sex. It's about the presumption that men *always* press for sex, and the modern feminist thinking that builds from that assumption. That's the toxicity I'm pointing out, and who else (the next man) is losing there.
@@_sniper2305 Currently, for most young men, as in the 18-35 group, the situation is pretty bad. That "free and easy sex" is had by only the most attractive 20%. Generally, only the top 5% have it frequently with multiple partners. For the other 80% it often nothing at all. Once in a while, one of them gets married to a "settling down" woman hitting 30, and she treats him terribly compared to the guys that she couldn't get to settle down. These husbands are essentially being resented for not being in that top 20%.
Hi! This was a fantastic video, thank you for putting it together. As a small suggestion: it would be interesting - if you're willing to make a video about it or even briefly answer here - to learn more about the life path you've taken or, maybe more specifically, the beliefs or experiences that have led you to hold the views that you do. In a digital world consumed by the gender wars, it's rare to hear anyone speak in a critical, detached, non-partisan way about "their own side." Personally, I'd love to learn more about how you've arrived where you have.
It's good to have this speech coming from a woman. Yet I fail to find many in the comments. What's your opinion on why women have so little interest in self reflection and self improvement, both as a group and as individuals ?
I don't think that it gets them anywhere, at least in the short term. If men preferred women who were philosophical and self-reflective, we'd see more of it in women. I think most women are focusing energy on maintaining their appearance. Keeping up with beauty standards can be a full time job. Although, just FYI, I've met women who are very deep people.
@@erinruhl5377 Personnally, I can't bond with a woman who's too superficial. And I see successful men valuing being smart as an important quality for their wife, maybe not number 1 but close following. Also, why do I see more guys in the gym if appearance is so important for women ? Is it that modern women stay away from hardship ? I've seen videos of women in Vietnam in the 70's working very strenuous jobs in the rice fields, and I would imagine it also could have been the case for the rest of the world before the modern era.
In regards to toxic masculinity.. there is a difference between suppression emotions and having self control. Self control enables you to behave in a civil society. Caving to every emotion leaves you feral and doing bad things to yourself and others. This is especially important for men because of their physical size and ability. There are many things that were engraved into and pass down from generation to generation that were part of society because it enabled a mostly successful society. Yes, it wasn't perfect, but it generally worked. When the 60s came and everything switched from generational based knowledge to scientific knowledge in the general society, we lost all of that. It has taken 2 generations for science to start to prove that some of what was done in the past was actually good for society. It took thousands of years for society to learn this before. All thrown away only to be rediscovered again.
Great take, very grounded, humble and wise. Personally, I'm not a fan of the "toxic" label for masculinity or femininity as neither is inherently toxic, but rather can have corrosive antisocial effects when operating from a wounded or otherwise insecure place - which is all too common today. It's important for us as men and women to reclaim the divine nature of our birthrights and move away from zero-sum antagonism. Thank you for sticking up for masculinity and doing such a wonderful job articulating the strengths of femininity
What's so toxic about traditional femininity? What's so toxic about traditional masculinity? Who goes downstairs when your wife hears a sound in the middle of the night? Yes, all of our emotions are present for a reason, including shame. I'm absolutely smitten by you. I thought I knew so much, and your info is filling in blanks in my knowledge like Tetris blocks. So, fun
Good, well thought out and presented video tackling a problem in a society that has skewed values and a broken moral compass. I like that you avoided the blame game to a degree and kept to the facts where important. The MGTOW movement has come as a response to toxic femininity and we see ourselves in a battle that neither side wanted. The feminist movement has been distorted over time to mean something completely different to that its founders created it for. Equality has become a buzzword for corporations and those wanting to change a society that worked into one that solely focuses on profit and big business. It is no coincidence that corporations have diluted the workforce by creating "opportunities" ( for want of a better word ) that attract women into the workplace to fulfil their subliminal messaging that women need more power than they had before the sexual revolution. Wages have been depressed to a point that most live hand to mouth because there isn't enough workplaces to go around to satisfy the needs of men let alone women. Traditional roles in the workplace can now be filled by any gender and making equality laws has even made it that business can now pick and choose and use the excuse of quotas to get away with it.
If women were to move out of the workforce, would the remaining men make more money? I think it's pretty obvious that women aren't happy today, with the divorce rate being so high. They have to work full time jobs and pay daycare centers to raise their kids. No wonder so many of them are miserable.
@@erinruhl5377 I want to also avoid the blame game here. Men are walking away from women for different reasons. Throughout history from the dawn of mankind men have provided for and protected women because it is in their DNA. Men are stronger for this reason. It is literally what they were built to do and has been ingrained in them passed from father to son forever. You cannot just reverse that paradigm without consequence. In answer to your question, yes men would be paid more in a society that recognised that each gender were built for a specific purpose. Supply and demand comes into play where it used to be that corporations vied for and begged for qualified men to work for them. This has been reversed by flooding the job market with available labour in the form of women.
@@erinruhl5377 I wrote a whole lengthy reply to this but pressed a wrong button and lost it all lol. So here goes again. I want to avoid the blame game here as well. By flooding the market with available labour corporations can and do profit from this by keeping wages low whereas it used to be they vied for qualified men to fill these roles and were willing to pay for it. So yes men would be paid more if women stepped away from those roles traditionally held by men. Men were literally built to provide and protect women, it's in their DNA and passed from father to son from the dawn of mankind. They had to be stronger to protect their family from dangerous animals and hunt to provide for their mate and children. You cannot play with that paradigm and hope there to be no consequence. Men are walking away for different reasons but I think the main one is that their is no more necessity to provide and protect yet women still expect it because it is a woman's DNA. And fair enough. She provides a service to him in sex and offspring and making a home ( his legacy if you like ) and he reciprocates the only way he knows how and is expected to do so by his very genetics. It was always a fair deal.
@@andreparadis6076 "you can't play with that paradigm and hope there will be no consequences". You're totally right. I hear what you're saying about avoiding blame, because people can't help but to conform to their societies, but the ball is actually in women's court. Women are the ones who can change all this.
Growing up as a kid in the 1970s I used to consider feminism a good thing because the world was unbalanced and unfair. Once in the workplace I (working in offices where I was often the only man, or one of 2 men, in communications ) saw at first hand how the women I worked with genuinely felt that women were better than men. In other words, feminism was not about equal, it was about superiority. I disagree with female superiority same why I disagreed with male superiority in the 1970s, simply because I still bel that men and women are equal. Neither is superior and the world needs both in equal measure.
I talk a lot about this in dutch on tiktok, but most woman dont want to hear ittttttttttt 😂. I know them very well. I expose every dirty secret and they hate me for it haha.
I mostly believe with what you say, could tell from how you present yourself that I would...I believe the words beings pushed to us now which are the terms toxic-masculinity and toxic-femininity are being pushed to destroy the fabric of our society. It is also quite obvious in the sense that real masculinity is not dangerous nor is real femininity harmful. An example would be that real masculinity is a strong feeling of protection for the biological weaker people of society, in that sense a "real man" and a figure of what actual masculinity is would never place his hands on a woman nor a child. We see this in most of the great philosophers and warriors in our human history, many of them extremely violent but also just. These words are so engraved and pushed now in our society to make us not focus on the beautiful and useful aspects that both masculinity and feminity bring to the table in a functioning society. The real problem is men who can't control their emotions (hence not "toxic-masculine" individuals)...teach a society to function according to that and see where it gets you; they're the ones who attack women and schools when they're sad or angry since they have been programed to never take control of their emotions. I truly feel bad for women this age, sexual roles push each other and balance each other out. An extremely masculine person will be with an extremely feminine person and the opposite is also true, a society full of feminine males will push women to become more masculine, not more feminine. Good video and subject, please help the young girls out there to understand the importance and beauty of true femininity 👍
This was a very insightful and organized presentation, my hats off to you! The way I see it Masculinity and femininity are societal ideas I feel have overstayed its welcome. The reality of the matter is men and women are not much different from each other. Should those biological and slight psychological differences be ignored? Of course not but I'm under the believe that convincing the general public the we should/are completely different from eachother will only further divide us. I believe there should be women who are aggressive, strong, and logical. As well as men who are compassionate, sensitive, and emotional. Their are traits that are better then others of course, but I believe the time has come for society to encourage growth as individuals.
This very ideology is a big contributor to the division. You don't think there are any implications to your behavior and psychology whether you have sperm or eggs? Eggs are scarce, pregnancy and lactation require obscene amount of investment. Sperm is abundant and require no investment, just a bit of fun time. So the female obviously has to be the sexual selector. That means there has to be some standards by which to measure men who are worthy to have sex with. She will want to save those scarce eggs ideally for good genes and someone who can provide the necessary resources and protection because she is infinitely more invested in the children. Those traits of compassion, sensitivity and emotional are not really conductive to that, they are either negative or neutral. At best they are good for making the man more willing to commit but they don't change the value of that commitment essentially being zero unless there are also the masculine traits that are actually valuable. Telling people we are the same seems to encourage them to cultivate traits in themselves that they would value in opposite sex, but it doesn't actually change the realities for the other sex and they will become very bitter and disappointed in the other sex. So do those things "you should do" (according to whom and why, why is this ideology even good?) at your own peril.
@@Clinueee I never said there weren't any differences in behavior between men and women, but it is very minimal at best. From the way you write it really makes it sound like you regard man and women as biological machines measuring every each other in every regard to see if they are worthy of mating. We're not talking about attraction here, that's a whole other ballpark. We're talking about the societal differences between masculinity and femininity, and why I think they are harmful for everybody. Masculinity and femininity do not exist in biological behavior for the most part, it is mostly societal standards we made up over 100's of years. Has it been working? Yeah sure at first when we were in the stone age. In recent centuries its only been causing a great divide between us, and even sexual confusion. I think these expectations for men and women need to go away and look more deeply into "who we are" instead of "what we are".
It is not toxic masculinity nor toxic femininity that is the problem, it is pathological behaviours of otherwise healthy gender specific personality traits that are the problem. I do reject both terms because in my opinion they are both idelogically (?) driven which divide the genders (of which there are only two btw) Anger only becomes a problem when it is getting pathological (?) and even voilence in itself is not bad because self defense (and the defense of others beein attacked) is also voilence just because you don't see it that way that doesn't make it so. It is the same with nearly any other trait that has been named, so far i haven't heard a single example that justifies the term toxic masculinity. Sorry for spelling errors, english isn't my first language
My general rule of thumb when it comes to what is toxic Masculinity/femininity is to take good traits and add selfishness. 9 times out of 10 the behavior people talk about as being toxic has a connection to good behavior. This makes it hard to differentiate between good men/women and toxic men/women
Emotionally repressed, AKA Emotionally stable, in control of their emotions (most of the time), what is the opposite? Yes if they don't have a good Father and or are stupid, they can (often) go off the rails.
21:15 "I think the phenomenon of passport Bros is interesting. Passport Bros are men who go to other less developed countries to find a wife. They do this because women in other countries aren't nearly as judgmental about men and are more likely to be happy with a man the way he is, unlike American women and their impossible criteria. This is an example of how a feminine trait like hypergamy in the right context can be toxic: it results in women never finding a husband at all because they're far too picky and women are too promiscuous gossip social exclusion and slander do so much harm to women, and it causes the kind of wounds that leave no bruises or scars, And the problem with that kind of abuse is that you don't have any physical proof of its existence." Yes - however, I have a few friends (years/decades ago) who met their wives in the Far East and Eastern Europe. In both cases, they wound up coming back to the States and ultimately getting divorced, which makes one wonder if those women weren't being hypergamous by using him as a ticket to a green card/citizenship. I knew of another woman (also from Eastern Europe) who came over as an "exchange student" ... long enough to attract and marry a man ... all while she confessed to me that she had a child back in Eastern Europe. It's anecdotal, but it's to say that you cannot guarantee that a man cannot guarantee that a non-western women isn't also hypergamous ... just not with the same types of things.
The way I see it you’re the high earner over there technically proving that women would rather share the top 20-40% of men but won’t admit and will try to persuade you against it
Exactly. I'm all for a woman speaking on these matters but it should be directed towards women. This is just an echo chamber of guys agreeing. The real change comes when the rest of the women listen.
I believe sex is still powerful because it is not given out freely by women. It's given to very select men. So for the rest of men, sex is still highly valued.
I appreciate hearing this. Toxic masculinity is real but the typical definition of toxic femininity always bothered me. It says that toxic men are always aggressive (which I can’t argue against) and toxic women are always submissive victims. There is also truth to that. I think there two types of toxic femininity: passive or aggressive. The passive type encourages women to be victims and the aggressive type makes them socially vicious. They are conditioned to be either victims or victimizers. Men are only allowed to be victimizers. There doesn’t seem to be a healthy middle ground.
There’s a video from Layton Observer discussing toxic masculinity. Toxic masculinity that doesn’t have to be aggressive. It can be manipulative, forceful etc without the physical aspect
Traditional masculine traits made our world. Rebranding it as 'toxic' is just the feminist's way of attacking the traditional roles played by men. There is nothing toxic about it other than the fact that it opposes the doctrines of feminism. As a boy who grew up into a man with clear expectations of what a man is or does, I don't see anything toxic about it. Is it the stress associated with meeting the expectations? I dealt with it naturally. What are the feminists actually concerned with? I have seen attempts by feminists to conflate masculinity with bullying and call bullying toxic masculinity. Bullying has nothing to do with masculinity. There are just as many female bullies as male bullies. Even women who combat femininity often talk about toxic masculinity as the root cause of toxic femininity. This is not true.
I'm super confused by this. A lot of what's being discussed here is bullying between women because of women competing for male attention. But the only time I've ever seen women bully each other, is 1) non-hetero women calling hetero women pick-mes for liking a guy, or 2) lesbians bullying bisexual women for their attraction to men. I have seen the devouring other issue though. I usually either see this more with single mothers raising sons, or women in relationships with men, where the man is more like a child being led by the mother, creating a situation where she seems like a single mother, which then affects the children.
Too little, too late- it will take generations to repair the damage that has been done by both genders and it has become a serious issue for humanity and procreation as is most visible in Japan where mothers advertising their "leftover" daughters like spoiled food . It may not have the same media coverage in western countries but has become a global issue and the very survival of love, sensitivity and humanity is in dire need in order to survive.
You're absolutely right. This is a crisis that most people don't see coming because it's hard to imagine how fewer people could be a bad thing, but it is.
@@erinruhl5377 The pressing issue is that we are running out of time. There is no universal resolution ,all i can think of is to listen and speak to one another ,find a language, common ground and build on that without constantly attacking each other and further division. It's as old as rulership, the most brutal and unethical weapon ever invented. If you are learned in strategy you will find the desperation in the very attempt.
@@sylvio2094 It's gotten too economical at this point. Too many people make money from career-minded women. The battle of the sexes rages on, fueled by feminist and MGTOW rhetoric. Marriage rates continue to be abysmal thanks to no-fault divorce.
@@erinruhl5377 It's obvious that the traditional laws of economics don't apply anymore aswell as human interaction. There is only one way to untangle the Gordian Knot.
well... whoever talks about toxic masculinity as if it was generally a real issue, abdicates all being appreciated enough intellectually for listening to or entertaining discourse with. besides, as fish don't see water, so xx.s aren't aware of the detriment they're implying at largest, to anybody incl. selves. for else stated in the video, as far as coherent and not just usual hivemind memes, it's too late already. ENOUGH
8:14 Wrong. Men do not have higher status. It’s easy to get wrong: The high status people (measured against the male yardstick) are predominantly men. However the people with the lpwest status are also men. However these men are always filtered away when making these arguments. Along with average men.
Men did not step into the famine role, but women didn't step into the masculine role either. Sure, men didn't start doing traditional famine roles like cooking and cleaning, but women didn't start doing manual labor, home repairs, vehicle maintenance etc . Men don't just go work to make money and then sick around the house like the stupid sitcom depictions of men. It really all boils done to women down playing men's contributions and over valuing their own contributions, while complaining they got the raw end of the deal. Great, you pay your own bills like the rest of us, but now you have to do the cooking, cleaning, childcare, vehicle maintenance, manual labor, home repairs, and defend yourself. The only masculine role women took was going to work every day.......Now everyone has to do everything for themselves (cooking, cleaning, vehicle maintenance, manual labor, etc....) men and women.
You talk of toxic masculinity but that is taught by women in the nurturing years ie nursery rhymes like girls are made of sugar and spice and all things nice . And boys are made of slugs and snails and puppy dogs tails ! ! ! Just as one example
Halfway through, i have heard enough and given up waiting for your opinion on this topic. I'm very disappointed. I was expecting to hear your thoughts on it - not a lecturing diatribe from an article full of the same traditional rubbish i hear from toxic masculine men. As a shy and sensitive guy i'm attracted to more confident career women and so i see the potential of calling certain feminine traits as toxic femininity. Nice to know i can add this terminology to my arguments when i am constantly told *I* should be the one to approach, lead, etc.
Why would anyone expect an adult human being to be submissive. Is it a fetish? An adult isn't a child that needs to be guided. Another thing, people are basically a spectrum of different traits. A woman who stands her ground isn't masculine, she's just assertive. A man who shows emotions isn't feminine, he's a human being. Why there's the need to create the boxes and force people into it? I agree that some feminists go too far when they oppose some the stereotypical feminine traits as the idea should be that women.have.the.right.to.choose. If a woman wants to be submissive, it's up to her. I'd find it odd, but again, it's her choice. I'd never agree to call submissiveness as strength, though. It is litteraly the synonym of passiveness. It leaves too much room for others to push you around. I used to be a shy and passive person and I advise anybody to get rid of that trait as fast as possible, period.
Because in relationships between men and women, that's what works. Of course women have a choice to be submissive or dominant, but a woman who submits to the leadership of her man wields more power that way, and the relationship operates more efficiently. A marriage isn't supposed to be about just one person and their rights to autonomy. It's supposed to be conducive for raising children. When a woman makes that sacrifice of dominance in order to maintain her marriage, she's choosing to be selfless for the sake of her kids. Once a woman is married and has children, it's no longer about her independence and her ego, it's about making the marriage functional so it runs smoothly because that's what is good for her children. It has nothing to do with sex.
@@erinruhl5377 I was a child in a houshold like this and it has a good side to it, indeed. I learned, thanks to it, what kind of wife I don't want to be and what kind of husband I'll never tolerate. As a child I never liked the dynamic they had, neither my siblings. We learned that submission equals power that can be misused. We grew frustrated with it. People are too imperfect to hold power like that over another adult human being and based on that, I disagree with you.
@@Ehrill942 No one is going to force you to get married and have children. But typically, women want committed relationships and they want babies. Marriage and the nuclear family is a flawed system, but it's still the best system we have.
@@erinruhl5377 Sure and that is perfectly fine that they want it. However, not every one of them wants to find herself in a situation that requires her to put on a cosplay of a submissive wife. Humans are not as simple as men = dominant, women = passive. Sometimes that would go against their nature. At least some children will pick up on their parent's internal struggle and they won't be happy about it, I assure you. I wasn't. A dominant husband and a submissive wife dynamic leads to the boost of man's ego while it crumples female's ego. Accepting it is what women did for millenia agreeing to their subjugation. Life isn't a Hollywood movie, which means that men aren't perfect human beings that always make proper decisions or treat you right. Women, as adult human beings, are good enough to have a voice of their own. Therefore, submission is out of the window.
@@Ehrill942 I see where you're coming from because I used to think like you. I thought traditional gender roles were oppressive, but now that I have more experience, I see how practical they are. My point is that it's not about the woman as an individual. It's about working together. If a woman is married to an abusive tyrant, then I agree she should get out of that situation.
We don't live in a true Capitalist society and a true Capitalist society has not existed since the Stock Market. Only private companies are truly Capitalist companies, corporations are more like corporate socialism than they really are capitalist.
Wow so much internalised misogyny girlie please do a yourself a favour and be a girl’s girl! Women are imo the only people who genuinely love women as a whole and truly understand each other so why pass on negative stereotypes that harm them🌺 Sister I’m rooting for you you don’t have to tell men what they want to hear you don’t owe them anything 💫💕💕 xx
You are toxic. Almost eveyone love women and that's why they became narcissists. Then after dealing with the evil they do, men become redpilled. The internet is exposing women's manipulation and you don't like it and lie.
I’m going to send this video to my daughter. There is more here than what most pastors ever talk about on a pulpit.
Thank you so much
Going to the gym in what's essentially underwear for attention, secretly filming men glancing in their direction, then posting it online, accusing the men of wrongdoing - for more attention.
Making herself look like an object of desire, and making the men look like perverts.
@@erinruhl5377 Only an *asshole* thinks of male sexuality as perverse.
Theres nothing wrong with traditional masculinity
You did a great job. I haven’t seen this talked about much yet so I applaud you
I'd like to see more discourse about it.
@@erinruhl5377 so would I! Good luck, hopefully this will take off and go viral
Remember us real masculine men hate losing but understand it, it makes us stronger!
Definitely
That's rubbish! It makes us stronger always? Sometimes, perhaps. Another sweeping statement.
@@Anonymous-ym8gr notice I said us real feel me
Years later someone will "discover" this video and wonder aloud why no one listened to it's warnings
I'm glad you mentioned Peterson. I once saw him say that women put people into one of 3 categories: 1. Infant 2. Caregiver(s) of Infants 3. Threat. This blew my mind because I see it everywhere. The infant doesn't necessarily have to be an actual infant but any person or group of people perceived as weak or at a disadvantage like maybe seniors or minority groups. The latest of which is the LGBTQs.
The women that do this stuff have placed themselves in the role of caregiver of infant and this gives them an ego boost, power, and a way to virtue signal. They also use this to control the behaviors of others especially men, who, if they don't go along with the caregiver of infants rules are run off and accused of being a threat. Far too many men cave in to this an end up acting like the white knight when really they have just become a trained dog of the caregiver of infants. And if a man rejects this position the woman quickly turns herself into the infant/victim and calls in higher authorities to act as caregiver of infant and take that man away or run him off.
And the really wild part about this is that if you explicitly told and expected these women to be the caregivers of infants, they would rebel and condemn the audacity of trying to "force her" into some "traditional patriarchal gender role". But when you just watch what they do, they appear to desperately want to be the caregivers of infants.
And one more tool that a lot of women use is plausible deniability to avoid accountability. But I've said enough.
Thanks for this video. It's about time women started speaking out and calling out the toxic behaviors of other women because they are not going to listen to a man discuss any of this. He instantly becomes the threat. They tried this with Jordan Peterson. He survived it but what chance does the average man have at standing up to the woke mob?
Thank you for this comment. You hit the nail on the head. There are so many contradictions in modern feminism, it makes me want to pull my hair out. Women have been told we can have it all, but we can't. We don't have unlimited time and so therefore, sacrifices must be made. Jordan Peterson talks a lot about making the right kind of sacrifices. If women want a lucrative career, they must sacrifice spending time taking care of children, but that urge to nurture becomes sublimated and can turn into abuse towards men and other women. I think it's time for women to wake up and realize that regret is one hell of a deterrent.
extremely insightful
Be careful with Jordan Peterson.
Even if he says some good advices, a lot of what he says is rooted in a political agenda and have been debunked multiple times. An example of this is the lobster.
I advise to double check every person that become millionnaire while pushing the agenda of the rich.
when 'men are people' is one of the nice things you've been told for a long time. and its not even directed at you
I'm glad that this was in my recommends and I subscribed. Yours is the first treatment of Toxic Femininity that I have seen that did not try to present it as just a byproduct of Toxic Masculinity but rather discussed it as something that is capable of existing on it's own, entirely separate from Toxic Masculinity.
Over the years, I have frequently seen women behave horribly to other women, as have nearly all men who are paying attention. These women are typically awful to men as well, but they use an entirely separate 'toolkit' for that. Women's toxic behavior towards other women looks very different from their toxic behavior towards men.
Where Feminism comes into the mix, the issue is that we are told that it is for all women yet I have seen women be treated badly within Feminist circles simply because of a difference of opinion on certain issues, as if a woman no longer qualifies as a woman simply for thinking differently. The first time that I saw this was when I was in college. I knew one couple who were devout Christians and were planning to get married right after graduation. One semester, she decided to enroll in a Women's Studies 101 class to fulfill either a Social Sciences or Humanities elective that she needed. She said at the time that she thought that would be an interesting way to fulfill that elective requirement, sitting in a room with other women discussing the history of women and that she was looking forward to it.
Fast forward a few months to the end of that semester. He and I are sitting together laughing as she described in graphic detail just how thrilled she was to be finished with that class and how horrible it was! She said that, as a woman who was heterosexual, Christian, politically moderate on most issues and planning to get married after college that she was frequently singled out and treated with hostility by the other students in the class and on a couple of occasions even by the professor! He and I raised our fists in the air and said, "Solidarity sister!" That didn't go over well...
Isn't it funny how feminism is supposed to be good for women when in reality it's the complete opposite? Feminists say they care about women's issues and then turn around and torment women who don't think like they do. In academia, the minds of young women are turned against men and pumped full of lies. I appreciate your comment, and it's disappointing to hear what happened to your friend in that women's studies class. I hope the lies of feminism become exposed and that women will one day wake up.
That's just a shitty learning environment for any1, whether they're conservative traditional housewives or anarcho-feminist protesters with facial piercings and blond dreadlocks (just a cliche i know)
“This is not a buffet,
This is not ponderosa”😂
Top notch video again. Liked and subscribed.
The divine feminine and masculine. Yes what is missing in the discourse is an understanding of the metaphysical and archetypal ground. That’s why everyone is completely confused and arguing from a groundless place.
There is polarity, there are archetypes in the psyche we moderns have lost.
Feminism should be called Manism!
Spot on I think and this video was another great one and it's the second of yours I've watched.
So incredible to see even the definition of toxic femininity point a subtle finger back to it actually being about toxic men for condemning women to such passive characteristics. There, once again, we can see the deep extent of gynocentrism that runs through our society which is never spoken about or admitted especially by women. To admit to being the protected species with the intolerable.
Thank you and I think you are a great contribution to the space.
Thank you so much for your compassion and understanding towards men and for being so brave to speak truthfully about these issues🙏🏼
I think one of the most difficult things of being a good parent is gradually letting your children be more independent and allow them to develop self reliance. I think some parents struggle with that as it goes against their urge to protect their children
Absolutely, and it's hard to know the right amount of freedom you should give them.
That’s the reason why fathers are necessary. Fathers discipline their wives to let their children experience the world. Single mothers fail in that regard miserably. That is one of the reasons why fathers AND mothers are necessary.
This video hit all the marks! Thank you! Having traditional imigrant parents, I had a hard time understanding why my mom implied on teaching me about femininity and gender roles but I'm so glad that's my upbringing. I was able to catch up to the sabotage of feminism and capitalism especially when I experienced the harms of hookup culture and noticed the odd hate for feminine qualities. I found that I enjoyed falling into more traditional gender rolls, wanted a family and to prioritize raising my children well more than a career. I still have a degree and I know that I'm competent in many ways but I have no desire to compete with men.
Implied = insisted??
Omg, THANK YOU! I've been saying this for years now! I feel so vindicated! Thank you so much for making this! I've been arguing about this very stuff and making these very points with a friend of mine! its insane! I'm not crazy! 🙏
Good luck to you Erin. Hope you channel grows. I like thoughtful analysis.
You're a great role model. I've tried to say similar things but got identified as a 'pick me' girl.
The person who called you that was probably just mad bc you're smarter than them. 😊
Wonderful insight !
Excellent content! 👍🏻 Cristal clear concepts explained with pin point accurasy. 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
I had a few good decades. I feel sorry for young guys today, now women don’t even think they have to try. Now I invest my energies elsewhere and live alone, it’s nice to see the results pay off and to live without the chaos.
Ok. I finally get it now.
Men actually behaving like men as nature intended = to be discouraged.
Women behaving like men = greatly encouraged.
Makes perfect sense.
This was an absolute beautiful explanation all the way around thank you
You're very welcome ☺️
Thoughtful & interesting
It's great that you're honest about the *natural traits* of both men & women. I'm glad you mentioned Louise Perry as well as the toxic politics of current feminism. ☠
Why aren't you out here fishing for compliments and seeking validation from strangers? Oh, that's right. You have content which is actually important and needing to be said.
One thing that often gets overlooked is that while men are physically stronger, women are generally more robust than men; living longer and healthier lives (less prone to illness)
Thank you! Lovely video from a lovely woman.
Keep it up Erin... You've got excellent form, and we need people like you to speak up! You'll go far... good luck!
Thank you, it is interesting.
15:11 "... the ideology of feminism prevailed which told women and girls that in order to be equal women needed to start having sex like men treating it like any other social interaction. Since that time sexual expectations have changed under the pretense that there are no longer consequences of having sex even though in reality that's not true. In today's society, a lot of young girls and women think their virginity is a burden that they must get rid of because they want to fit in with their peers. The problem is that sex is now cheap and easy to get and the group that suffers from this state of affairs is women."
Actually, the bigger loser is the men who never recieved that sex anyway, but decided to "play by the rules". Societal ridicule for them and their situation is off the charts. Sex is not "cheap and easy to get" for all men ... this is a major "red pill" point.
15:54 "... women have lost their only real power in the world."
The fact that you quoted it as a "power" speaks to this loss by those men. It's one of the consequences of having that sex that isn't being mentioned.
If a man and a woman go on a first date, and they have sex, and the man never speaks to her again, that's considered a win for the man, but it's a painful loss for the woman.
@erinruhl5377 A lot of modern feminist thinking is to erase the pain of any loss for that woman - basically, to redefine "loss" to "gain". And that's a lot of what your video goes over, when you say her friends are talking her into getting rid of her virginity and/or sleep around.
My argument is not about the man in your scenario, it's about another man *following* that scenario - the one who dates her next or who dates her when she decides to "settle down", while he was either struggling to date at all and was being "good" in not pressing for sex. It's about the presumption that men *always* press for sex, and the modern feminist thinking that builds from that assumption. That's the toxicity I'm pointing out, and who else (the next man) is losing there.
@@_sniper2305 Currently, for most young men, as in the 18-35 group, the situation is pretty bad. That "free and easy sex" is had by only the most attractive 20%. Generally, only the top 5% have it frequently with multiple partners. For the other 80% it often nothing at all. Once in a while, one of them gets married to a "settling down" woman hitting 30, and she treats him terribly compared to the guys that she couldn't get to settle down. These husbands are essentially being resented for not being in that top 20%.
Bautifull presentation! Hello from Romania!
Good organized presentation.
Hi! This was a fantastic video, thank you for putting it together. As a small suggestion: it would be interesting - if you're willing to make a video about it or even briefly answer here - to learn more about the life path you've taken or, maybe more specifically, the beliefs or experiences that have led you to hold the views that you do. In a digital world consumed by the gender wars, it's rare to hear anyone speak in a critical, detached, non-partisan way about "their own side." Personally, I'd love to learn more about how you've arrived where you have.
Very good video.
Thank you!
It's good to have this speech coming from a woman. Yet I fail to find many in the comments. What's your opinion on why women have so little interest in self reflection and self improvement, both as a group and as individuals ?
I don't think that it gets them anywhere, at least in the short term. If men preferred women who were philosophical and self-reflective, we'd see more of it in women. I think most women are focusing energy on maintaining their appearance. Keeping up with beauty standards can be a full time job. Although, just FYI, I've met women who are very deep people.
@@erinruhl5377 Personnally, I can't bond with a woman who's too superficial. And I see successful men valuing being smart as an important quality for their wife, maybe not number 1 but close following.
Also, why do I see more guys in the gym if appearance is so important for women ? Is it that modern women stay away from hardship ? I've seen videos of women in Vietnam in the 70's working very strenuous jobs in the rice fields, and I would imagine it also could have been the case for the rest of the world before the modern era.
@@jeanpaulkassdale going to the gym is more about status. High status men work out, and it's the status that they chase
In regards to toxic masculinity.. there is a difference between suppression emotions and having self control. Self control enables you to behave in a civil society. Caving to every emotion leaves you feral and doing bad things to yourself and others. This is especially important for men because of their physical size and ability.
There are many things that were engraved into and pass down from generation to generation that were part of society because it enabled a mostly successful society. Yes, it wasn't perfect, but it generally worked. When the 60s came and everything switched from generational based knowledge to scientific knowledge in the general society, we lost all of that. It has taken 2 generations for science to start to prove that some of what was done in the past was actually good for society. It took thousands of years for society to learn this before. All thrown away only to be rediscovered again.
Very good 👍
Great take, very grounded, humble and wise. Personally, I'm not a fan of the "toxic" label for masculinity or femininity as neither is inherently toxic, but rather can have corrosive antisocial effects when operating from a wounded or otherwise insecure place - which is all too common today. It's important for us as men and women to reclaim the divine nature of our birthrights and move away from zero-sum antagonism. Thank you for sticking up for masculinity and doing such a wonderful job articulating the strengths of femininity
What's so toxic about traditional femininity?
What's so toxic about traditional masculinity?
Who goes downstairs when your wife hears a sound in the middle of the night?
Yes, all of our emotions are present for a reason, including shame.
I'm absolutely smitten by you.
I thought I knew so much, and your info is filling in blanks in my knowledge like Tetris blocks. So, fun
Good, well thought out and presented video tackling a problem in a society that has skewed values and a broken moral compass. I like that you avoided the blame game to a degree and kept to the facts where important. The MGTOW movement has come as a response to toxic femininity and we see ourselves in a battle that neither side wanted. The feminist movement has been distorted over time to mean something completely different to that its founders created it for. Equality has become a buzzword for corporations and those wanting to change a society that worked into one that solely focuses on profit and big business. It is no coincidence that corporations have diluted the workforce by creating "opportunities" ( for want of a better word ) that attract women into the workplace to fulfil their subliminal messaging that women need more power than they had before the sexual revolution. Wages have been depressed to a point that most live hand to mouth because there isn't enough workplaces to go around to satisfy the needs of men let alone women. Traditional roles in the workplace can now be filled by any gender and making equality laws has even made it that business can now pick and choose and use the excuse of quotas to get away with it.
If women were to move out of the workforce, would the remaining men make more money? I think it's pretty obvious that women aren't happy today, with the divorce rate being so high. They have to work full time jobs and pay daycare centers to raise their kids. No wonder so many of them are miserable.
@@erinruhl5377 I want to also avoid the blame game here. Men are walking away from women for different reasons. Throughout history from the dawn of mankind men have provided for and protected women because it is in their DNA. Men are stronger for this reason. It is literally what they were built to do and has been ingrained in them passed from father to son forever. You cannot just reverse that paradigm without consequence. In answer to your question, yes men would be paid more in a society that recognised that each gender were built for a specific purpose. Supply and demand comes into play where it used to be that corporations vied for and begged for qualified men to work for them. This has been reversed by flooding the job market with available labour in the form of women.
@@erinruhl5377 I wrote a whole lengthy reply to this but pressed a wrong button and lost it all lol. So here goes again. I want to avoid the blame game here as well. By flooding the market with available labour corporations can and do profit from this by keeping wages low whereas it used to be they vied for qualified men to fill these roles and were willing to pay for it. So yes men would be paid more if women stepped away from those roles traditionally held by men. Men were literally built to provide and protect women, it's in their DNA and passed from father to son from the dawn of mankind. They had to be stronger to protect their family from dangerous animals and hunt to provide for their mate and children. You cannot play with that paradigm and hope there to be no consequence. Men are walking away for different reasons but I think the main one is that their is no more necessity to provide and protect yet women still expect it because it is a woman's DNA. And fair enough. She provides a service to him in sex and offspring and making a home ( his legacy if you like ) and he reciprocates the only way he knows how and is expected to do so by his very genetics. It was always a fair deal.
@@andreparadis6076 "you can't play with that paradigm and hope there will be no consequences". You're totally right. I hear what you're saying about avoiding blame, because people can't help but to conform to their societies, but the ball is actually in women's court. Women are the ones who can change all this.
Growing up as a kid in the 1970s I used to consider feminism a good thing because the world was unbalanced and unfair. Once in the workplace I (working in offices where I was often the only man, or one of 2 men, in communications ) saw at first hand how the women I worked with genuinely felt that women were better than men. In other words, feminism was not about equal, it was about superiority.
I disagree with female superiority same why I disagreed with male superiority in the 1970s, simply because I still bel that men and women are equal. Neither is superior and the world needs both in equal measure.
Men and women should be TREATED equally. But they are not equal and we all know and can see that.
I talk a lot about this in dutch on tiktok, but most woman dont want to hear ittttttttttt 😂. I know them very well. I expose every dirty secret and they hate me for it haha.
I feel so heard.
I mostly believe with what you say, could tell from how you present yourself that I would...I believe the words beings pushed to us now which are the terms toxic-masculinity and toxic-femininity are being pushed to destroy the fabric of our society. It is also quite obvious in the sense that real masculinity is not dangerous nor is real femininity harmful. An example would be that real masculinity is a strong feeling of protection for the biological weaker people of society, in that sense a "real man" and a figure of what actual masculinity is would never place his hands on a woman nor a child. We see this in most of the great philosophers and warriors in our human history, many of them extremely violent but also just. These words are so engraved and pushed now in our society to make us not focus on the beautiful and useful aspects that both masculinity and feminity bring to the table in a functioning society. The real problem is men who can't control their emotions (hence not "toxic-masculine" individuals)...teach a society to function according to that and see where it gets you; they're the ones who attack women and schools when they're sad or angry since they have been programed to never take control of their emotions.
I truly feel bad for women this age, sexual roles push each other and balance each other out. An extremely masculine person will be with an extremely feminine person and the opposite is also true, a society full of feminine males will push women to become more masculine, not more feminine. Good video and subject, please help the young girls out there to understand the importance and beauty of true femininity 👍
Great video. Thank you for making it.
You're welcome ☺️
This was a very insightful and organized presentation, my hats off to you! The way I see it Masculinity and femininity are societal ideas I feel have overstayed its welcome. The reality of the matter is men and women are not much different from each other. Should those biological and slight psychological differences be ignored? Of course not but I'm under the believe that convincing the general public the we should/are completely different from eachother will only further divide us. I believe there should be women who are aggressive, strong, and logical. As well as men who are compassionate, sensitive, and emotional. Their are traits that are better then others of course, but I believe the time has come for society to encourage growth as individuals.
This very ideology is a big contributor to the division. You don't think there are any implications to your behavior and psychology whether you have sperm or eggs? Eggs are scarce, pregnancy and lactation require obscene amount of investment. Sperm is abundant and require no investment, just a bit of fun time. So the female obviously has to be the sexual selector. That means there has to be some standards by which to measure men who are worthy to have sex with.
She will want to save those scarce eggs ideally for good genes and someone who can provide the necessary resources and protection because she is infinitely more invested in the children. Those traits of compassion, sensitivity and emotional are not really conductive to that, they are either negative or neutral. At best they are good for making the man more willing to commit but they don't change the value of that commitment essentially being zero unless there are also the masculine traits that are actually valuable.
Telling people we are the same seems to encourage them to cultivate traits in themselves that they would value in opposite sex, but it doesn't actually change the realities for the other sex and they will become very bitter and disappointed in the other sex. So do those things "you should do" (according to whom and why, why is this ideology even good?) at your own peril.
@@Clinueee I never said there weren't any differences in behavior between men and women, but it is very minimal at best. From the way you write it really makes it sound like you regard man and women as biological machines measuring every each other in every regard to see if they are worthy of mating. We're not talking about attraction here, that's a whole other ballpark. We're talking about the societal differences between masculinity and femininity, and why I think they are harmful for everybody. Masculinity and femininity do not exist in biological behavior for the most part, it is mostly societal standards we made up over 100's of years. Has it been working? Yeah sure at first when we were in the stone age. In recent centuries its only been causing a great divide between us, and even sexual confusion. I think these expectations for men and women need to go away and look more deeply into "who we are" instead of "what we are".
There is "off the reservation" and there is...this.
@@mrsherwood2599 Care to explain what you mean?
@@mickmack810 I do not.
It is not toxic masculinity nor toxic femininity that is the problem, it is pathological behaviours of otherwise healthy gender specific personality traits that are the problem.
I do reject both terms because in my opinion they are both idelogically (?) driven which divide the genders (of which there are only two btw)
Anger only becomes a problem when it is getting pathological (?) and even voilence in itself is not bad because self defense (and the defense of others beein attacked) is also voilence just because you don't see it that way that doesn't make it so.
It is the same with nearly any other trait that has been named, so far i haven't heard a single example that justifies the term toxic masculinity.
Sorry for spelling errors, english isn't my first language
My general rule of thumb when it comes to what is toxic Masculinity/femininity is to take good traits and add selfishness. 9 times out of 10 the behavior people talk about as being toxic has a connection to good behavior. This makes it hard to differentiate between good men/women and toxic men/women
well said
pretty bold
Discount meat is great! 🥩 You never know what's gonna be there.
It's an adventure every time.
Discount mystery meat is even better!
Ptomaine?? Besides Ptomaine??
@@NicoleTaylor-rc1zn Especially ptomaine.... mmm, ptomaine 🤤
@@erinruhl5377 lol 😂
Emotionally repressed, AKA Emotionally stable, in control of their emotions (most of the time), what is the opposite? Yes if they don't have a good Father and or are stupid, they can (often) go off the rails.
21:15 "I think the phenomenon of passport Bros is interesting. Passport Bros are men who go to other less developed countries to find a wife. They do this because women in other countries aren't nearly as judgmental about men and are more likely to be happy with a man the way he is, unlike American women and their impossible criteria. This is an example of how a feminine trait like hypergamy in the right context can be toxic: it results in women never finding a husband at all because they're far too picky and women are too promiscuous gossip social exclusion and slander do so much harm to women, and it causes the kind of wounds that leave no bruises or scars, And the problem with that kind of abuse is that you don't have any physical proof of its existence."
Yes - however, I have a few friends (years/decades ago) who met their wives in the Far East and Eastern Europe. In both cases, they wound up coming back to the States and ultimately getting divorced, which makes one wonder if those women weren't being hypergamous by using him as a ticket to a green card/citizenship. I knew of another woman (also from Eastern Europe) who came over as an "exchange student" ... long enough to attract and marry a man ... all while she confessed to me that she had a child back in Eastern Europe. It's anecdotal, but it's to say that you cannot guarantee that a man cannot guarantee that a non-western women isn't also hypergamous ... just not with the same types of things.
Valid counter argument
The way I see it you’re the high earner over there technically proving that women would rather share the top 20-40% of men but won’t admit and will try to persuade you against it
Is hypergamy really the issue? The men I know have been left for drug addicted homeless men.
What percentage of your viewership is female?
Exactly. I'm all for a woman speaking on these matters but it should be directed towards women. This is just an echo chamber of guys agreeing. The real change comes when the rest of the women listen.
I believe sex is still powerful because it is not given out freely by women. It's given to very select men. So for the rest of men, sex is still highly valued.
I appreciate hearing this. Toxic masculinity is real but the typical definition of toxic femininity always bothered me. It says that toxic men are always aggressive (which I can’t argue against) and toxic women are always submissive victims. There is also truth to that. I think there two types of toxic femininity: passive or aggressive. The passive type encourages women to be victims and the aggressive type makes them socially vicious. They are conditioned to be either victims or victimizers. Men are only allowed to be victimizers. There doesn’t seem to be a healthy middle ground.
Totally. 💯
There’s a video from Layton Observer discussing toxic masculinity. Toxic masculinity that doesn’t have to be aggressive. It can be manipulative, forceful etc without the physical aspect
Traditional masculine traits made our world. Rebranding it as 'toxic' is just the feminist's way of attacking the traditional roles played by men. There is nothing toxic about it other than the fact that it opposes the doctrines of feminism. As a boy who grew up into a man with clear expectations of what a man is or does, I don't see anything toxic about it. Is it the stress associated with meeting the expectations? I dealt with it naturally. What are the feminists actually concerned with? I have seen attempts by feminists to conflate masculinity with bullying and call bullying toxic masculinity. Bullying has nothing to do with masculinity. There are just as many female bullies as male bullies. Even women who combat femininity often talk about toxic masculinity as the root cause of toxic femininity. This is not true.
Oh dear,,,!!!!!
I disagree that foreign women are less picky. Western men enter into foreign less developed nations and move up in status to the top 5%.
Comment
Hilarious 🤣
@@erinruhl5377 May your channel grow and may you be well. Thank you
I'm super confused by this. A lot of what's being discussed here is bullying between women because of women competing for male attention. But the only time I've ever seen women bully each other, is 1) non-hetero women calling hetero women pick-mes for liking a guy, or 2) lesbians bullying bisexual women for their attraction to men.
I have seen the devouring other issue though. I usually either see this more with single mothers raising sons, or women in relationships with men, where the man is more like a child being led by the mother, creating a situation where she seems like a single mother, which then affects the children.
Too little, too late- it will take generations to repair the damage that has been done by both genders and it has become a serious issue for humanity and procreation as is most visible in Japan where mothers advertising their "leftover" daughters like spoiled food . It may not have the same media coverage in western countries but has become a global issue and the very survival of love, sensitivity and humanity is in dire need in order to survive.
You're absolutely right. This is a crisis that most people don't see coming because it's hard to imagine how fewer people could be a bad thing, but it is.
@@erinruhl5377 The pressing issue is that we are running out of time.
There is no universal resolution ,all i can think of is to listen and speak to one another ,find a language, common ground and build on that without constantly attacking each other and further division.
It's as old as rulership, the most brutal and unethical weapon ever invented.
If you are learned in strategy you will find the desperation in the very attempt.
@@sylvio2094 It's gotten too economical at this point. Too many people make money from career-minded women. The battle of the sexes rages on, fueled by feminist and MGTOW rhetoric. Marriage rates continue to be abysmal thanks to no-fault divorce.
@@erinruhl5377
It's obvious that the traditional laws of economics don't apply anymore aswell as human interaction.
There is only one way to untangle the Gordian Knot.
well... whoever talks about toxic masculinity as if it was generally a real issue, abdicates all being appreciated enough intellectually for listening to or entertaining discourse with. besides, as fish don't see water, so xx.s aren't aware of the detriment they're implying at largest, to anybody incl. selves. for else stated in the video, as far as coherent and not just usual hivemind memes, it's too late already. ENOUGH
#karen.r
She looks like reviewbrah
Masculinity is not toxic!!!
or toxic masculinity is being sexy to women as the sweet bois get nun
8:14 Wrong.
Men do not have higher status.
It’s easy to get wrong: The high status people (measured against the male yardstick) are predominantly men. However the people with the lpwest status are also men. However these men are always filtered away when making these arguments. Along with average men.
Until very recently they did
Men did not step into the famine role, but women didn't step into the masculine role either. Sure, men didn't start doing traditional famine roles like cooking and cleaning, but women didn't start doing manual labor, home repairs, vehicle maintenance etc . Men don't just go work to make money and then sick around the house like the stupid sitcom depictions of men. It really all boils done to women down playing men's contributions and over valuing their own contributions, while complaining they got the raw end of the deal. Great, you pay your own bills like the rest of us, but now you have to do the cooking, cleaning, childcare, vehicle maintenance, manual labor, home repairs, and defend yourself. The only masculine role women took was going to work every day.......Now everyone has to do everything for themselves (cooking, cleaning, vehicle maintenance, manual labor, etc....) men and women.
Yet another feminist critique of feminism
You talk of toxic masculinity but that is taught by women in the nurturing years ie nursery rhymes like girls are made of sugar and spice and all things nice . And boys are made of slugs and snails and puppy dogs tails ! ! ! Just as one example
Boys go to Jupiter to get more stupider.
Girls go to Mars to get more candy bars. lol That's one I remember. You're right, though
Halfway through, i have heard enough and given up waiting for your opinion on this topic. I'm very disappointed. I was expecting to hear your thoughts on it - not a lecturing diatribe from an article full of the same traditional rubbish i hear from toxic masculine men. As a shy and sensitive guy i'm attracted to more confident career women and so i see the potential of calling certain feminine traits as toxic femininity. Nice to know i can add this terminology to my arguments when i am constantly told *I* should be the one to approach, lead, etc.
No such thing. Wemons are perfect, just as their divorce lawyers, drizzle drizzle.
Why would anyone expect an adult human being to be submissive. Is it a fetish? An adult isn't a child that needs to be guided. Another thing, people are basically a spectrum of different traits. A woman who stands her ground isn't masculine, she's just assertive. A man who shows emotions isn't feminine, he's a human being. Why there's the need to create the boxes and force people into it?
I agree that some feminists go too far when they oppose some the stereotypical feminine traits as the idea should be that women.have.the.right.to.choose. If a woman wants to be submissive, it's up to her. I'd find it odd, but again, it's her choice. I'd never agree to call submissiveness as strength, though. It is litteraly the synonym of passiveness. It leaves too much room for others to push you around. I used to be a shy and passive person and I advise anybody to get rid of that trait as fast as possible, period.
Because in relationships between men and women, that's what works. Of course women have a choice to be submissive or dominant, but a woman who submits to the leadership of her man wields more power that way, and the relationship operates more efficiently. A marriage isn't supposed to be about just one person and their rights to autonomy. It's supposed to be conducive for raising children. When a woman makes that sacrifice of dominance in order to maintain her marriage, she's choosing to be selfless for the sake of her kids. Once a woman is married and has children, it's no longer about her independence and her ego, it's about making the marriage functional so it runs smoothly because that's what is good for her children. It has nothing to do with sex.
@@erinruhl5377 I was a child in a houshold like this and it has a good side to it, indeed. I learned, thanks to it, what kind of wife I don't want to be and what kind of husband I'll never tolerate. As a child I never liked the dynamic they had, neither my siblings. We learned that submission equals power that can be misused. We grew frustrated with it. People are too imperfect to hold power like that over another adult human being and based on that, I disagree with you.
@@Ehrill942 No one is going to force you to get married and have children. But typically, women want committed relationships and they want babies. Marriage and the nuclear family is a flawed system, but it's still the best system we have.
@@erinruhl5377 Sure and that is perfectly fine that they want it. However, not every one of them wants to find herself in a situation that requires her to put on a cosplay of a submissive wife. Humans are not as simple as men = dominant, women = passive. Sometimes that would go against their nature. At least some children will pick up on their parent's internal struggle and they won't be happy about it, I assure you. I wasn't.
A dominant husband and a submissive wife dynamic leads to the boost of man's ego while it crumples female's ego. Accepting it is what women did for millenia agreeing to their subjugation. Life isn't a Hollywood movie, which means that men aren't perfect human beings that always make proper decisions or treat you right. Women, as adult human beings, are good enough to have a voice of their own. Therefore, submission is out of the window.
@@Ehrill942 I see where you're coming from because I used to think like you. I thought traditional gender roles were oppressive, but now that I have more experience, I see how practical they are. My point is that it's not about the woman as an individual. It's about working together. If a woman is married to an abusive tyrant, then I agree she should get out of that situation.
Contrarian silliness.
Capitalism is to blame, but no one dares say it.
Capitalism or consumerism?
No ones to blame for your behavior but yourself take accountability.
Nah, it's the Devil!
We don't live in a true Capitalist society and a true Capitalist society has not existed since the Stock Market. Only private companies are truly Capitalist companies, corporations are more like corporate socialism than they really are capitalist.
What are you even talking about? Bunch of crazy conspiracy theorists say that.
Wow so much internalised misogyny girlie please do a yourself a favour and be a girl’s girl!
Women are imo the only people who genuinely love women as a whole and truly understand each other so why pass on negative stereotypes that harm them🌺
Sister I’m rooting for you you don’t have to tell men what they want to hear you don’t owe them anything 💫💕💕 xx
I appreciate this comment. Thank you 😊
Wow! Just wow! Here to protect the secretes of the sisterhood, huh?
You are toxic. Almost eveyone love women and that's why they became narcissists.
Then after dealing with the evil they do, men become redpilled.
The internet is exposing women's manipulation and you don't like it and lie.
Being a girls girl is why she needs to do this. You don't understand the mess that society is in. Ignorance is bliss.
Boring! Boring! Boring!
Chill Robert
are you a child? watch something else if your are uninterested sherlock