Exhausting and frustrating, I have met these women in almost every job I've ever had. I'm lucky if it's just one woman, way down the hall. Unfortunately, there is usually a group of them and it is awful. Life is great for the most part, but when these woman start to back stab, gossip and create trouble where there wasn't any - it just drains the life out of you and it can be so hard to fight back against it and remember that their behavior is only ever a reflection on them, and never a reflection on us. Self love and self care can go a long way, but it still remains that eternal question of: why does anyone act like this?
mean girls are even more toxic to men coworkers. men are called creepy even if they did nothing to them, they can make false sexual advancement claims.. like for instance, if he attends a conference and she is working it. she sees him walking towards him down an aisle and automatically says to others that he is stalking her, but he sees her says hi and walks down another aisle looking at other vendors at the expo. when guys see that, we automatically assume she is too much in her head
Unfortunately, I didn’t know that pointing out the issues and that there’s a workplace bully who’s being placed at the top of the hierarchy would get me fired…. So that is EXTREMELY valid that people feel that way- it’s true
Workplace bullies are hurt people who use their manipulative behavior to get revenge for being hurt. Why can’t we just go to work, do our best job, support each other, network, mind your business, and go home to our family.
Yes, that's my experience, most of these people are unhappy with their own lives and just miserable people who feel better by making other people feel bad.
Tih look mñ 🎉🎉😢Ttte is is a good one for me tr The first thing I r going to do when ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤Love tree comes on the next day is to get my hair ra eeee and 🎉 I will be so happy to see y 😮iijiijjjjjjjjj it tt😂😂 the😮
Jordan Peterson has talked about this with great insight ! This is a women’s issue because of the way we tend to deal with conflict. Still very sad & destructive to see most women are against women in the workplace. In my own experience as a C-Suite executive in the beauty industry my best coaches and bosses were mostly man or women who were very secured of themselves. Otherwise, I had bosses who were viciously disrespectful & openly wanting to make me fail & feel hopeless despite of my ability to do great work. I can only encourage women being in the receiving end to remember that you can face the bully and create your own opportunities! Do not put up with it or believe their lies because you can confront the bully, get out of these situations and create healthier places for women to work at.
@@HerMoney Should I call the police, have them arrested and lock up these cowardly lazy bullies who are so miserable and super jealous of me being the top worker and that I own a condo too Been working for 40 years as a top worker. I will never let bullies ever win. I'm 56 now and they are trying to destroy my reputation with defamation of character at work. Saying I go harassing women, I'm a stalker and that I drink, I'm crazy, insecure, unstable. All 100% pure bs.I don't even drink and never stalked anyone in my life and my manager is 100% on my side too. I've never been suspended. But these bullies gaslight me, using flying monkeys and kind of gang stalking me at my condo with the same rumors. These bullies have been doing this to me for the last 16 years. This started 2 years before getting my condo for the past 16 years. I'm being targeted over and over trying to make me quit or make lots end up hating me for my professional reputation with very fake bad rumors. I will never quit to let these low life cowards ever win. But they will never get fired by these 2 bullies who also never work. I would need solid proof to get them arrested. No one wants to investigate. Maybe I should hire an investigator myself. lol or get them to do a lie detector test. lol My manager wants to do nothing because he's too afraid that the bullies could end up perhaps destroying his reputation.. Now that is a huge red flag. Making people scared of me in my condo and to hate me thinking that they will kick me out. I'm very respectful and have owned my condo for 14 years now. Bullies at work are so jealous. I just ignore it at work and in my condo too and try not to defend myself or react while they are trying to provoke me or should I do something about it since it will never stop, by trying to destroy me? This is criminal.
My mother had a nasty coworker that got sent to work with someone else after two years of harrasing her, the next person that worked with that nasty lady was so upset with her that he did something and got sent home for two weeks. After he came back, he had a heart attack and left two children orphans. I told my mom that you should have been more vocal abput that nasty lady with HR. That man died of stress and workplace harrasment.
I am a school nurse and work with all women. If I could work with a group of guys instead I would in a heartbeat. Women are gossipy and always want to be in the limelight…the ones I work with are. I am reserved and quiet and im feeling like some of them resend it.
This has specific application to the workplace; and in general can extrapolate for other environments-home, church, community. I appreciate that you clarified need to vent and process vs gossiping. Holding it in to avoid being judged for gossiping is an important differentiation. Reality checking is a process. Thank you.
Right? I can clean my side of the street all day long, sometimes you're gonna have to push back and be assertive and stand your ground. (And sometimes this will isolate you)
This here ----Is my currently technique and with consistent meditation and mindfulness i have been able to be consistent with it. It doesnt help when they have a native language i dont understand and i can tell they are setting me up for failure just by the way they speak and look at me - only issue is that they underestimated my capabilities!
I work in home health care for handicapped elders and have confronted the woman that I can sense definite hostility from...a couple of times...but she just denies it. Its childish as hell the things that she does...but I'm so fed up with the anxiety I feel every time I come in to relieve her. I don't get it...I work hard and do my best to make things as easy as possible on anyone coming in after my shift. This isn't the first place I've been treated like this before...I've actually had it much worse before. I just don't understand...I pray every time I go to work for peace...I make it through each night, but I'm so miserable. How can I fix this if she denies doing anything out of spite. PLEASE help me GOD...what am I missing here?
Hi Alicia, we're so sorry you're going through this and hope you found this episode helpful. Jean will also answer your question on an upcoming mailbag segment of the podcast.
It’s not you. Dont think it is. They’re going to gaslight tf out of you. Please don’t fall for it. Obviously she’s miserable and wants you to be too. It’s horrible and I’m so sorry you’re going thru this. I go thru it a lot. I’m young athletic and confident. Miserable people hate positive healthy and happy ones …
I had a manager who would deny things and eventually I confronted her and told her firmly that I didn’t believe what she was saying to me. Apparently she kept thinking I was falling for anything she said, when in fact I was highly aware. In hindsight, I would have tried the approach where I tell her that I know she cares about the role and that I’m on the same team as her and to see what the frustrations were about. Even though I’m not sure if that would help because she was very passive aggressive. In another role, I had to send an email to the bully and cc’ed leadership saying there was a pattern of gaslighting and I wanted to shed light on it and turn things around. That did not sit well with the director, I got a very angry phone call but I was able to switch managers after that and then switched departments eventually.
Having seen and experienced bullying in the workplace. It would be great to know how to manage this as I have struggled with managing this. I think I feel powerless as hierarchical others have power over your employment
I think women have the exactly same issues with the tension between offering dignity/respect as men do in the workplace. It’s a human condition not mediated by gender.
These type of women are everywhere, in clubs, in Churches, where there are women. I As a refuge, of nonEnglish speaking country, have been subjected to painful ridicule and bullying Now I am old heading out of life, gladly . I still carry the.painful treatment of women I barely knew, but mistreated me.
It is extremely unpopular to have principles and morals, and to hold people accountable, most colleagues would rather have the toxic fun workplace, gossip sessions and of course the acceptance and sometimes praise from the mean girls...its awful
There are rotten people out there who achieve all they want at work. I now realise it’s a very different value system that has them being just ok to choose to be a- holes.
People don’t care enough about you to hate you in the way you think. If they’re being unkind or difficult towards you there’s definitely something going on with them.
I been bully and it not a good feeling. I do everything in my power to treat everyone with respect and kindness. But when I feel being bully I make it very clear by being direct about my feelings towards that person. That’s how you let everyone know it’s not you but that person is being mean. Trust me it gets everyone attention.
I also make sure I am kind and respectful. I also believe at work if I do not like a person that I have a respect to focus on respect and the work at hand. Though I am easy to get on with , I now know that the people I did not like were behaving badly and my professional response only showed them what they could get away with.
19:08: watching privledge speak on things she’s absolutely clueless about is a true privledge. How would women know ? Hmmm I wonder how they would know 🤔
I would be fired if I was to say the truth plus I do tell people and they get so angry for months and don’t like me but I’ll take that over being fake with them
I think it’s good to call out the fact that they are jealous
Not all bullies are hurt people.
That’s right. They’re actually people without any real life or hobbies. Why else would they need to bully others. They fear their own company🤮
Exhausting and frustrating, I have met these women in almost every job I've ever had. I'm lucky if it's just one woman, way down the hall. Unfortunately, there is usually a group of them and it is awful. Life is great for the most part, but when these woman start to back stab, gossip and create trouble where there wasn't any - it just drains the life out of you and it can be so hard to fight back against it and remember that their behavior is only ever a reflection on them, and never a reflection on us. Self love and self care can go a long way, but it still remains that eternal question of: why does anyone act like this?
mean girls are even more toxic to men coworkers. men are called creepy even if they did nothing to them, they can make false sexual advancement claims.. like for instance, if he attends a conference and she is working it. she sees him walking towards him down an aisle and automatically says to others that he is stalking her, but he sees her says hi and walks down another aisle looking at other vendors at the expo. when guys see that, we automatically assume she is too much in her head
because they are evil, arrogant, jealous, and the list goes on. Wouldn't want to be em!
Unfortunately, I didn’t know that pointing out the issues and that there’s a workplace bully who’s being placed at the top of the hierarchy would get me fired…. So that is EXTREMELY valid that people feel that way- it’s true
Workplace bullies are hurt people who use their manipulative behavior to get revenge for being hurt. Why can’t we just go to work, do our best job, support each other, network, mind your business, and go home to our family.
Unfortunately these evil individuals are literally demonic possessed. This is what we’re up against.
Yes, that's my experience, most of these people are unhappy with their own lives and just miserable people who feel better by making other people feel bad.
Tih look mñ
🎉🎉😢Ttte is is a good one for me tr The first thing I r going to do when ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤Love tree comes on the next day is to get my hair ra eeee and 🎉 I will be so happy to see y 😮iijiijjjjjjjjj it tt😂😂 the😮
Jordan Peterson has talked about this with great insight ! This is a women’s issue because of the way we tend to deal with conflict. Still very sad & destructive to see most women are against women in the workplace. In my own experience as a C-Suite executive in the beauty industry my best coaches and bosses were mostly man or women who were very secured of themselves. Otherwise, I had bosses who were viciously disrespectful & openly wanting to make me fail & feel hopeless despite of my ability to do great work.
I can only encourage women being in the receiving end to remember that you can face the bully and create your own opportunities! Do not put up with it or believe their lies because you can confront the bully, get out of these situations and create healthier places for women to work at.
We need a video addressing mean girl recruiters
Great point, we'll discuss doing an upcoming episode on that!
@@HerMoney Should I call the police, have them arrested and lock up these cowardly lazy bullies who are so miserable and super jealous of me being the top worker and that I own a condo too Been working for 40 years as a top worker. I will never let bullies ever win. I'm 56 now and they are trying to destroy my reputation with defamation of character at work. Saying I go harassing women, I'm a stalker and that I drink, I'm crazy, insecure, unstable. All 100% pure bs.I don't even drink and never stalked anyone in my life and my manager is 100% on my side too. I've never been suspended. But these bullies gaslight me, using flying monkeys and kind of gang stalking me at my condo with the same rumors. These bullies have been doing this to me for the last 16 years.
This started 2 years before getting my condo for the past 16 years. I'm being targeted over and over trying to make me quit or make lots end up hating me for my professional reputation with very fake bad rumors. I will never quit to let these low life cowards ever win. But they will never get fired by these 2 bullies who also never work. I would need solid proof to get them arrested. No one wants to investigate. Maybe I should hire an investigator myself. lol or get them to do a lie detector test. lol My manager wants to do nothing because he's too afraid that the bullies could end up perhaps destroying his reputation.. Now that is a huge red flag. Making people scared of me in my condo and to hate me thinking that they will kick me out. I'm very respectful and have owned my condo for 14 years now. Bullies at work are so jealous. I just ignore it at work and in my condo too and try not to defend myself or react while they are trying to provoke me or should I do something about it since it will never stop, by trying to destroy me? This is criminal.
My mother had a nasty coworker that got sent to work with someone else after two years of harrasing her, the next person that worked with that nasty lady was so upset with her that he did something and got sent home for two weeks. After he came back, he had a heart attack and left two children orphans. I told my mom that you should have been more vocal abput that nasty lady with HR. That man died of stress and workplace harrasment.
We're so sorry this happened to someone you knew
I am a school nurse and work with all women. If I could work with a group of guys instead I would in a heartbeat. Women are gossipy and always want to be in the limelight…the ones I work with are. I am reserved and quiet and im feeling like some of them resend it.
This has specific application to the workplace; and in general can extrapolate for other environments-home, church, community. I appreciate that you clarified need to vent and process vs gossiping. Holding it in to avoid being judged for gossiping is an important differentiation. Reality checking is a process. Thank you.
Agreed, thank you for watching!
Toxic pastors and enabling church members.
Brilliant advice and content and I am only 8 minutes into the video. Yes, these women are acting just like middle schoolers. Thank you!
Thanks for tuning in, and we're so glad you're finding the content helpful!
This is all well and good, until you’ve got a sociopathic mean girl in any sort of position of authority.
Please. I've just about had it...having to deal. These types are so disruptive...and full of themselves. I have no respect. Who would?
Right? I can clean my side of the street all day long, sometimes you're gonna have to push back and be assertive and stand your ground. (And sometimes this will isolate you)
Yep. I am experiencing this now. It's not just a 'mean girl' situation.
Just act totally dumb with bullies, like you are really DUMB. When no bullying, act smart and very effective. This works and you get fun out of it.
This here ----Is my currently technique and with consistent meditation and mindfulness i have been able to be consistent with it. It doesnt help when they have a native language i dont understand and i can tell they are setting me up for failure just by the way they speak and look at me - only issue is that they underestimated my capabilities!
I work in home health care for handicapped elders and have confronted the woman that I can sense definite hostility from...a couple of times...but she just denies it. Its childish as hell the things that she does...but I'm so fed up with the anxiety I feel every time I come in to relieve her. I don't get it...I work hard and do my best to make things as easy as possible on anyone coming in after my shift. This isn't the first place I've been treated like this before...I've actually had it much worse before. I just don't understand...I pray every time I go to work for peace...I make it through each night, but I'm so miserable. How can I fix this if she denies doing anything out of spite. PLEASE help me GOD...what am I missing here?
Hi Alicia, we're so sorry you're going through this and hope you found this episode helpful. Jean will also answer your question on an upcoming mailbag segment of the podcast.
I have experienced violence and extreme aggression. I have taken legal action
It’s not you. Dont think it is. They’re going to gaslight tf out of you. Please don’t fall for it. Obviously she’s miserable and wants you to be too. It’s horrible and I’m so sorry you’re going thru this. I go thru it a lot. I’m young athletic and confident. Miserable people hate positive healthy and happy ones …
@jillianbaglad you found legal help. ker3260
I had a manager who would deny things and eventually I confronted her and told her firmly that I didn’t believe what she was saying to me. Apparently she kept thinking I was falling for anything she said, when in fact I was highly aware. In hindsight, I would have tried the approach where I tell her that I know she cares about the role and that I’m on the same team as her and to see what the frustrations were about. Even though I’m not sure if that would help because she was very passive aggressive. In another role, I had to send an email to the bully and cc’ed leadership saying there was a pattern of gaslighting and I wanted to shed light on it and turn things around. That did not sit well with the director, I got a very angry phone call but I was able to switch managers after that and then switched departments eventually.
Having seen and experienced bullying in the workplace. It would be great to know how to manage this as I have struggled with managing this. I think I feel powerless as hierarchical others have power over your employment
I like this conversation , liked when you said "women have to advocate for there selves".
Can you mention in comments by posting the book title please
Hi Sarah, thanks for the feedback! Here is a list of all of Rosalind Wiseman's books rosalindwiseman.com/all-books
I think women have the exactly same issues with the tension between offering dignity/respect as men do in the workplace. It’s a human condition not mediated by gender.
These type of women are everywhere, in clubs, in Churches, where there are women. I
As a refuge, of nonEnglish speaking country, have been subjected to painful ridicule and bullying
Now I am old heading out of life, gladly . I still carry the.painful treatment of women I barely knew, but mistreated me.
That is so sad to hear. Sending you much love.
I think the fact that there are so few likes and views of this video, points to how many women are also in denial about this subject.
It is extremely unpopular to have principles and morals, and to hold people accountable, most colleagues would rather have the toxic fun workplace, gossip sessions and of course the acceptance and sometimes praise from the mean girls...its awful
There are rotten people out there who achieve all they want at work. I now realise it’s a very different value system that has them being just ok to choose to be a- holes.
People don’t care enough about you to hate you in the way you think. If they’re being unkind or difficult towards you there’s definitely something going on with them.
Such a good point!
When I went to a leader at work, who I respect, about an issue I felt better when leader would reply with, “consider the source (coworker).”
At no point I heard that the first thing you should do is to join a trade union and consult with that organisation to understand what your rights are.
most jobs now dont operate that way, jobs with union benefits are becoming increasingly rare...
Trade unions are a vital resource. Even though we may feel we pays subs for nothing. They are a force to challenge at the legal level too
Them: you can’t sit with us! 😑
Me: I don’t want to. 🥱
Them: 😲😵🥴😮💨🫠😶🌫️
I been bully and it not a good feeling. I do everything in my power to treat everyone with respect and kindness. But when I feel being bully I make it very clear by being direct about my feelings towards that person. That’s how you let everyone know it’s not you but that person is being mean. Trust me it gets everyone attention.
I also make sure I am kind and respectful. I also believe at work if I do not like a person that I have a respect to focus on respect and the work at hand. Though I am easy to get on with , I now know that the people I did not like were behaving badly and my professional response only showed them what they could get away with.
yes, a troop of 32 year old woman and 60 year old woman. C19 saved me😂
At 19:00 Patterns we’ve grown up with
19:08: watching privledge speak on things she’s absolutely clueless about is a true privledge.
How would women know ? Hmmm I wonder how they would know 🤔
When you feel you gotta go understand it will be the same elsewhere work on yourself
Sounds like Cosa Nostra family women working in low admin jobs at municipal governments in GTA.
At 18:00 - people in jobs can’t speak up
I would be fired if I was to say the truth plus I do tell people and they get so angry for months and don’t like me but I’ll take that over being fake with them
…