You are right Dusty Darrius.This is my opinion and my opinion only.these Real housewives,love and hip-hop and Basketball wives dont make it any better.Grown folks bullying.
As a woman, I have actually experienced this with MEN too! No one talks about how catty and jealous men can be towards women too. It is the most bizarre thing because people always try to say mostly women are catty but there are so many men who are just as bad.
Be careful of the ones that pretend to be your friends but try to sabotage you, expose your secrets or make backhanded compliments when they see you're levelling up
I wouldn't encourage friendship. I have tried my whole life to be that one forgiving person and l usually end up still being targeted. There are very few women who care for a genuine connection in the workplace. It's just like finding the right man, you are lucky if you find them.
@@gelastan518 i concur with your statement....I just try to keep to myself in the workplace. I have been burned too many times trying to friend most women at work. Throughout my career I have only met one person I can genuinely say is a friend.
@@Julia-um4rv that’s because there were manipulative and insecure. Be thankful that you’re strong enough not to be manipulated or insecure enough to try make people feel like crap. Good on you. Keep being your internally secure and kind self 👍
I actually just dealt with being bullied at my work place, but yesterday I finally spoke up and verbally fought back in a very classy way. Fast forward to today and none of the 4 females looked my way more than twice 😌
Your right. Alot of mean girls/bullies do end up being losers in the end. At my job, ive un watched the fall and misfortune of alot of people who were very nasty to me and other people.
Yes. I was somehow part of mean girl groups til junior year hs then in college. I knew when things werent right. I see these women & they are just trying to fit a mold or feel important. Not for me.
@@sam1bamslayer73 if someone keeps coming for you unprovoked, at some point you have to assume why are they so preoccupied with you. If they weren't then they would just leave you alone.
At my new job, its very cliquish and the girls tend to get in their witch circles and stare out the ladies who aren't in their clique. I used to be bothered by stuff like that but who wants to be friends with ppl like that anyways??
Lowkey Jane yass! I refuse to dumb down to be friends with a catty female. I hate that personality trait & don’t like the “can’t beat em’, join em” mentality. Keep the negativity far away from me. To me it’s not my job to figure out why you are the way you are. Only do that with my real friends. We all have insecurities but when you treat other like shit you will reap what to sow.
Everything you said was the truth! When I started college I thought that I had left the mean girls in high school... unfortunately not but happy that I learned how to deal with them better. Success is the greatest revenge, so keep shining :)
Praise Jesus. Also, Ephesians 6:12 12 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.
Great video but I do disagree with befriending them. Girls have literally lost their lives over frenemies. You can’t be friends with someone who’s jealous of you. PERIDOT. Just smile and keep it moving
Mean girls feed off of your ignoring them. Confronting works best. Although it sounds scary, it isn’t. You have to show them that you are not the one to be messed with! They prey on weakness/silence.
I've learned to just ignore them and keep my distance. I no longer tolerate mean girls or envious behavior directed towards me. The moment I discern nasty or fake behavior from others especially women, I remove myself or the Lord removes them.
My issue is that, I wasn’t the main target of abuse but had to stand up to protect others who had no voice and now I fear that abuse will be solely focused on me. I can’t stand seeing bullying and abuse. I tend to be a chicken when it comes to standing up for myself but a lion when defending others. I’m really dreading facing them tomorrow. I’m going to have to fake being brave and just act like it doesn’t bother me. Wish me luck 🙏
For whatever it's worth, that particular behavior of Yours is about as respectable as it gets. And the jerks do respect the Hell outta that kind of character and poise. They won't confess to it. But rest assured ... they most certainly do. They have to. They can't not. Very Commendable. Very Commendable. ~TD, Boston
A girl from my school (a popular girl) put on her Instagram story that she felt left out. I messaged her saying 'are you okay' and she just said 'piss off you're irrelevant'. Like, I just asked her whats wrong.
Thank you so much for this. I literally went through depression my whole life because my cousins, sisters and other girls around me wanted my blood no matter what I did. They copied what I did and how I dressed behind doors but spit in my face. I tried to be nice to people around me and I dimmed my light so much so girls would like me but it never worked. I had no one to help me fight these demons until I realized I was probably stronger than all of them and that’s why they always ganged up on me to gossip about me and i always felt like it was jealousy. Lately I’ve been able to block them out and it feels so good bc most of them want that power and attention and now I know that. I really wish I had this advice earlier in my life my it’s never too late!
Goku once said to Frieza "I don't know why you call people such mindless names it just shows how weak you are because it seems that's your only form of attacking people!!!"
Wish I saw this when I was 11...might've actually enjoyed my teenage years! Something that doesn't go away either when you grow up. I hope more young people see this and take note, very helpful xx
Basically: ignore them and don’t make yourself look like a fool because you stooped to their level. If it seriously bothers you, then have a conversation in private to talk about your feelings to see if maybe there was a misunderstanding.
It's so true that you have to establish the respect factor as soon as possible or people WILL walk over you. Great video girl, don't dim your liiiight :)
I've dealt with the mean girl bully type before, and I feel they feel they look better than you, but if they really feel they are beautiful, why do they try to make other women feel less than, they must really not feel too good about themselves inside, plus alot of women are like really miserable these days, crazy but true
I liked the poem. I was bullied today and I felt sick. I came home wanting to overcome this fear from abusive words. I started singing a song with the theme about words of anger and hate are only water on a duck's back to me. Singing it high gives the feeling of power and also claiming the oil of joy and gladness from the Holy Spirit to make my feathers water proof.
I’ve come to the conclusion they have low self esteem… end off. Ignore them… just cast your care regarding them. True your a threat. They are negative they rarely see anything positive… I can’t be bothered with them. I had one girl be vile she included flying monkeys to join in the Bulling I literally completely ignored them. When I was told all the nasty gossip I never gave anything back, nada zilch It had no where to go … it stopped.
The confrontation advise is setting yourself up for failure. Most of the time they will not admit they have a problem with you and they will gaslight you even more. Also insinuating that you misinterpreted it gives them free room to play you and turn it around. No need in expecting honesty from an envious person. They will be too ashamed to admit and it would ruin their ego and false persona. Instead trust your gut and set some boundaries.
I'm almost 60, and I have to say that the experience with mean girls from grade school and high school, and some of college has been like PTSD. I still avoid them to this day. My mother told me it was all in my head, that I was overly sensitive, that I was imagining things. I didn't know it was jealousy and insecurity on their part until I saw the segment "Odd Girl Out." I was 40. My husband and I were watching it, and suddenly it just hit me and I burst out sobbing. I never knew! It all fit together. I cannot begin to tell you how it was to be all alone during that time of life. All because of one pretty little girl who saw me as a threat, and her minions followed, doing any of her bidding. I often look back and wonder how I could have handled the situation better. I dumbed down, I didn't dress well, I didn't wear makeup -- all in the hopes of not causing any competition. I couldn't even get a new pair of shoes without her ''punishing'' me by making sure I was excluded. Sound crazy? I know. But it's true. I can tell you that completely ignoring is the key. When they know you've been annoyed, that's when they know they've got you. But when you're young and don't have a mother who will guide you, sometimes you don't have the mental strength to keep going in that vein. It does work. NEVER let them see they've made an impact. NEVER. I had to learn it's okay to be alone and go your own way. Wish I'd had someone like Z.H. to tell me this when I was young. Thanks for a good video and good advice to these young ladies.
Thank you for these great tips. Some great, empowering quotes as well. When I am feeling the pressure from mean girls or adult bullies, I like to think of the quote "Great minds talk about ideas, average minds talk about events, and small minds talk about other people." Not sure who said it, but it reminds me to keep calm.
This is meant for teens. Not grown up women like me. Grown up women got no time to engage in fights confronting women who dont know how to behave classy. IGNORE has done for me over the years. Focus on better things!
Going through the comments before I read yours, you should rethink that. Older ppl get passes only bc they're more fragile. Well, some actually act like it and have actual wisdom to share. As far as you? You still seem healthy go back to my first sentence. Then proceed. Younger folks wanna learn ish not feel belittled. But yeah, I'm not that mean girl... So there's that. Maybe older ppl have their/ our... Different situations to priortize more but you know life never stops throwing u curveballs...
stay far away from the dental industry!!! its damn loaded with mean girls! i mean they should stress this more than anything else in dental assisting school! I left dental because of this. I mean 2 years of school and 40k of student loans. gone because I got so tired of being treated like crap and attacked by other girls that were so darn insecure about themselves, they would constantly pick on me or try to boss me around ( and they aint my boss) lol. Im in a better place now, but i can warn anyone to stay away from dental
Its sad but especially in the black community we r so quick to put each other down....Roast each other or just simply hate on the next person for literally NO REASON!!! I've experienced this over and over this includes strangers that don't even know u. Ive learned ppl just feel like putting others down somehow makes them feel better....So i just ignore it but if they approach me threathening I'll take legal action
I have been through this for so long.. I felt I was ugly because all the kids at school said it but my family and friends always said I am good looking and that made me feel good.. once I turned 8 years old I got sick of being bullied, so I learned how to do Kung Fu.. when that happens now I smile and say god bless you and sometimes I laugh a long with them.. I'm a silly person but I'm quite as well.. when I listening to music sometimes I close my eyes and I use my mind to get away from the world or from bad people.. last time I close my eyes and listened to music, made up a world of my own my head..its nice
Man I remember watching this 4 years ago to deal with a traumatic bullying situation in high school. Thanks for helping so many of us in that time of need!
I left my second job for mean girls. It was so overwhelming and lonely. I truly couldn't work in an environment like that and how cliquey it was. It happened at a University, I was working at during c19 smh
Thank you so much for this! I have recently been diagnosed with anxiety and depression, because of problems at school. I appreciate this so much, this video was some well-needed therapy. 😘❤
These girls that I know are so mean and I cry after school when they do certain things and it really sucks I try to ignore them but it just seems like they are always there 😭
So basically there are 2 mean girls. Meangirl1 is friends with me and talks trash about meangirl2 when meangirl2 is sick. When meangirl2 is at school then meangirl1 goes to her and they bully me. Sometimes meangirl2 comes to me and were friends but then meangirl1 bullys me anyways. She said that im sassy(in a bad way) because i have an iphone (even though its one of the old ones) and because im wearing a choker. And once she said that i have to go to tiger and buy myself a brain (theres a shop flying tiger and they sell squishy brains)
I will take ur advise. I have mean girls in my food and beverage department there's a group of women cooks that give me dirty looks or look at me and laugh with someone by them. I overheard one of them say I'm going to eat all the pizza up. I heard them giggling. Our boss got a ton of pizza for our lunch meeting. I brushed it off but deep down it hurt. I hate having young n old woman at work being bullies and being awful. We need to lift each other up not bring anyone down. But I will just kill them with kindness or just avoid them.
Love, love, love your vibe and what you had to share in this video. Insecurity or malice fueled mean girl behavior has been something Ive experienced since early college and I could never wrap my brain around it. And sadly, I hate to say that it's been something Ive experienced most with other black women. It sincerely confuses and also hurts. Im about sharing a great vibe and learning about people. Women that are claws and teeth before they even know your name are so off putting. I love how you presented some strategies and also so inspo. Thanks chica!
Can we talk about how when you try to talk to those mean girls to understand why they’ve been behaving like that with you they blame you for starting drama and they also never give you proper explanation?
Gaslighting. I say it’s pretty much pointless to try and have a mature respectful conversation with people like this. Better if pouring that energy into yourself!
Wow! Thank you for this video, I have 2 daughters and they don't want to hear thi from me, I'm going to show this video and start the conversation now! Thank you for making this video!😘
Thank you so much for this video. I've been getting bullied at my school for about 3 years now. But meh I just don't care anymore. I start school in 2 days and meh I'm just going to ignore everyone and focus on school and my friends.
Seriously amazing girl! I wish I actually was someone that could shine but I’m not. With that said this was very helpful! I have been bullied my entire life from school to work and family. Time to cut them loose and listen to your videos lol 💜
Girl this was so beautiful, you, your message, the quotes, you inspire me so much, watching this was like going to church! Thank you so much, this is EXACTLY what I needed in my life! Goddess bless you!
Thank you, it's been hard. I'm dealing with some younger mean girls in my nursing program. It's strange because I'm older lol 😂. I've been getting a lot of rolled eyes and catty remarks. I'm trying so hard to be friendly and kind. LOL I am trying really hard not to let my "old me" from when I was younger come out. 😂😂😂
I loved this video! It made me feel so much better and like I wasn't alone😊 it's good to know beautiful successful people like u go thru it too but there's always a way to get thru it! 👌🏽😌 great video!
46 year old woman here dealing with a mean girl. I've never even met this woman but she makes it very clear that she doesn't like me. Your video has some serious truth to it. Thank you!
Wow, this is the best video on how to deal with bullies. You'd be surprised at how the so-called bully really likes you but doesn't know how to convey the message. Sometimes it's just a breach or break down in communication. Like always Zuri Hall this was awesome, great job!
I love the see it as a compliment. This is how I actually did see, before I caved into my insecurities. Now that I am feeling stronger. I see what you mean.
Some of my teammates from a skiing team bully me like...call me a pig,hit me and call me all kinds of different names...they always do that when our couch(es) arent there,i told my mom but she only said to "show my fangs" when they dont stop when i tell them to...she didnt do anything else,thats why i watched this video...to be completely honest this really made my day and i think ill try to use this awesome advice you've told me! Thanks a lot!❤
Hi my name is Yasmin and when I was little Like about in 1 and 2 Grade my whole class bullied me and my teacher and my parents were worried about my safety and they reported the school principal and she told "everything is going to alright and she said she's going to fire the teacher and talk to the parents who bullied me and a few years later I'm in Middle school and a girl named Abby bullied me last year school year and my parents\Friends and my Siblings gave me some advice but tomorrow is my first day of 7th grade and you gave some Really good advice you'll help me to stand out my bully Abby and going to be a cheerleader in school God bless and thank you!:-) From yasmin
@zurihall you my dear need to do more of that. I woke up with anxiety this morning and your vlog changed my energy to positive . Your tips were what I needed this morning. I am so thankful to follow you!!!!!!!! Thank you and God bless you girl all the way from Montreal !!! Xo ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
This us a great message! Thank you! I love the most is the tip to not dim your light, something that i normally feel as if i need to do to make way for others to not feel bad
I love this video I just watched, i just posted it on my Facebook page as well , I just transferred job depts. and dealing with mean females in my new dept . This video you made really helps me look at the brighter side of things 😉💕
Hi, Zuri! I just wanted to let you know how much this video means to me. I dm'd you a few months ago in a time where I was really struggling with people like this and allowed mean girls to chip away at my self esteem. Not only did you respond with a really encouraging message but you made a video and it's so so so inspiring to see all that you've done. So, TYSM I hope things continue to go up for you :) x
Its not just that Zuri. I have found that most of the mean girls/ bullies now are people who were really insecure/ rejected/ bullied at school, subconsiously trying to get their own back at kids who were more popular/ seen to be pretty, girls who the guys liked at school etc
Ignoring them is the best advice. You can't force people to like you by going to everyone who talks bad about you and telling them to like you or that you angry. You said they want attention and they shouldn't be given any. They are miserable.
Thank you so much for doing this video!! I so need this right now!! I'm going through the exact same thing at work, there are these two women, grown-ass women I should add, who I do not get on with at all!! They are really bitchy, snobby and stuck up and I can't stand them!!! I get no support from my boss, who used to stick up for me, and now he's taking their side!!!! I've decided to look for another job as I cannot stand working there anymore, and have recently started a new course so now I'm focused on that!!!
This is why I just prefer not to deal with women outside of my Mom. I've been through enough with them throughout my life. They're a whole headache🤦🏾♀️. No thanks💯.
So me and my friends have this huge group and we hang out a lot. We call ourselves "The Squad". There was this one girl in our group who always tries to act tough and is a huge wannabe. She's been picking on my bff at school and outside of school. A few years back in December, my friend called everyone but that one girl and invited us to her b-day party that night. It was a late invite but we all still went. One of our other friends asked "hey....where's Jacqueline? Did you invite her too?" I'm like "guys let's just go..." My bff said "I don't want her to come. Let's just go inside" but my friend insisted and went all the way up the hill to go get her. Me, my bff, and my cousin were like "ugh omg your joking" when she came down the hill. Ofc we played pretend and acted all nice to her. We went inside her house and sat at her table while my bff's older sister started taking photos of us and stuff. She wanted to do a dance competition and she said whoever has the best dance gets to be on her IG. Ofc I flat-out refused and so did my cousin. After, SHE started to take over the competition and started shaking her hips and stuff while my bff's sister joined her and was like "woo let's go Jacqueline!" The rest of us were just looking at each other like "wtf..." and we just watched her with attitude bc she looked dumb asf. My bff started groaning and I'm like to everyone "ok next year we ain't invitin that bitch" and we all just started laughing and after, SHE had the nerve to make fun of my friend bc she didn't wanna dance. My friend was like "look, it's my birthday party, not yours ok? I never invited you. STOP CRASHING EVERYONE'S FUN-" and I stood in between them and I was like "ok ok shush" while everyone else was like "ooooooh...." SHE looked like she wanted to jump her so I'm like "just leave her alone. Nobody wants you here anyways" and SHE'S like "umm excuse me?! Nobody wants you here!" I clapped back and was like "at least I was actually INVITED" and everyone was like "OOOOOOOHHHH SHIIIIIIT". SHE'S such a bitch and we all think so
When you’re watching videos like this, there’s this feeling you get like “I don’t need to watch this” . ITS TRYING TO STOP YOU FROM LEARNING DONT LISTEN TO IT YOU NEED IT
I told my mom and let’s just say not even the principal looks at me now. My mom handled that teacher like she was a mob boss. 3 year ago and no one even looks me and my sister in the eyes when they see us .... they are scared of off now
I work in education and it is full of mean girls. I would document everything nasty she says or does to you. Then, take this information to the principal. If there are other students experiencing the same, get them to document it and report it as well.
Been going through a lot with girls trying disgust themselves as friends and etc. Thanks for reminding me to never shrink myself. I truly truly needed this. I'm going to listen daily until I build the strength to make your words action. Thank you!
Thank you SO much for this. It really resonated with me❤ It was my first day at work today. I am an IA (instructional assistant) that is pursuing to be a teacher, and so thankful for it! The kids are so fun and inspirational. A girl even gave me a unicorn drawing. I was having such a good, happy time getting to know all of the kids, some parents, teachers and staff. AND THEN: one of the other IA's storms into the lunch room (where I was at) and commands me to immediately start cleaning tables. Mind you, I asked if I could clean tables earlier and was told not to do it from another IA. Mind you, it was my first day. Mind you, she was so condescending. I was talking to a student and was interrupted by this person, to be commanded to immediately clean tables (something I would love to help with, but please, why can't she ask nicely?). It really made the rest of my day and night horrible. Because she didn't stop there. She even went as far as yelling my name, pointing her finger, and shooting daggers with her eyes at me to tell me which child I should be helping. Going to talk with the principal about this tomorrow. The saddest part is that she doesn't even care about the students because when I tried being friendly and asked about her day, she said, "another day, another dollar." This makes me feel so sad for the kids. Teachers and staff should care about their school. Think of it from a parents perspective. What parent would want their kid to go to a school that has cranky staff members who only care about getting paid?... Guess I need to learn to talk back, stronger. I did ask to talk with her when we were done with the lunch room, but she interrupted me when I was trying to express that I didn't like the way I was treated and then when I asked if everything was ok, she responded with, "if you're feeling a hectic vibe, then that's good. It's supposed to be hectic" And then I got a backhanded apology. She said, "sorry, but I'm just trying to make sure you know what to do when I'm out on vacation in March because you'll be all by yourself." BUT that still does not give the right to yell at me! Especially, not in front of a student. Wow, I didn't think I'd write so much lol Gosh, wish I wasn't bothered by this ridiculous event
You can be the nicest person but people just love to put you down.
ladymusiclover I found that out the hard way
Being nice is a felony. Just be neutral and confident.
But why?
Lauren Martínez why r u here ur like 50 just wondering not being mean...
@@mandywatson2084 actually not 50, show some respect, at least ask for the age first 😡
I work with women in their late 50s and 60s who still act like mean girl pre-teens... it's embarrassing.
Lol. There is no age actually. It's a question of confidence and maturity.
Yup it's crazy
Yessss they be old as hell trying to beef with girls in their 20s. Like bitch if you don’t sit down some where 😂
Lol 😂
You are right Dusty Darrius.This is my opinion and my opinion only.these Real housewives,love and hip-hop and Basketball wives dont make it any better.Grown folks bullying.
Mean girls are usually just jealous of the next person.
+Lala Foreal yep, usually!
Hazel Potato yes, mainly because of beauty, or more things they don’t have. You are beautiful. Don’t listen to them.
As a woman, I have actually experienced this with MEN too! No one talks about how catty and jealous men can be towards women too. It is the most bizarre thing because people always try to say mostly women are catty but there are so many men who are just as bad.
I agree. I experience a lot of salty men, too.
Yes
Yes. Absolutely
Yeah I had some old fart remind me I'm no Katy Perry.
Be careful of the ones that pretend to be your friends but try to sabotage you, expose your secrets or make backhanded compliments when they see you're levelling up
THIS! THIS IS WHAT HAPPENED TO ME RECENTLY!
I wouldn't encourage friendship. I have tried my whole life to be that one forgiving person and l usually end up still being targeted. There are very few women who care for a genuine connection in the workplace. It's just like finding the right man, you are lucky if you find them.
At my work the mean girls would befriend coworkers that I was friends with and suddenly they weren't my friends anymore.
@@gelastan518 i concur with your statement....I just try to keep to myself in the workplace. I have been burned too many times trying to friend most women at work. Throughout my career I have only met one person I can genuinely say is a friend.
@@Julia-um4rv that’s because there were manipulative and insecure. Be thankful that you’re strong enough not to be manipulated or insecure enough to try make people feel like crap. Good on you. Keep being your internally secure and kind self 👍
I actually just dealt with being bullied at my work place, but yesterday I finally spoke up and verbally fought back in a very classy way. Fast forward to today and none of the 4 females looked my way more than twice 😌
Smiley Sunni how did you respond....would like to get tips lol...have something similar at my workplace
yasss girl! classy is best:))
Story time!! Spill the deets plz ❤️
period queen
Amen
They're just jealous losers that want your life to be as miserable as theirs. Like who still does drama after highschool.
Your right. Alot of mean girls/bullies do end up being losers in the end. At my job, ive un watched the fall and misfortune of alot of people who were very nasty to me and other people.
Sadly alot of people
Yes. I was somehow part of mean girl groups til junior year hs then in college. I knew when things werent right. I see these women & they are just trying to fit a mold or feel important. Not for me.
Sometimes people hate you because of the way that other people love you.
truth❤
They're either jealous or scared of you
Mean girls/bullies: you think you're the prettiest but you're not!
Me: im sorry that you're jealous at me.
EmmyX Gachaz sorry not sorry 😌
My friend said that to her bully who used to be friends with us
What are you sorry for they are the sorry ones
Why do women always say that it's so cringe like no
@@sam1bamslayer73 if someone keeps coming for you unprovoked, at some point you have to assume why are they so preoccupied with you. If they weren't then they would just leave you alone.
If you’re attractive and carry yourself well, get ready!!!!
Yes this is true. Never dim your light. You attract the best when you strive to be the best version of yourself.
😂 😂 sad!!!
At my new job, its very cliquish and the girls tend to get in their witch circles and stare out the ladies who aren't in their clique. I used to be bothered by stuff like that but who wants to be friends with ppl like that anyways??
Lowkey Jane yass! I refuse to dumb down to be friends with a catty female. I hate that personality trait & don’t like the “can’t beat em’, join em” mentality. Keep the negativity far away from me. To me it’s not my job to figure out why you are the way you are. Only do that with my real friends. We all have insecurities but when you treat other like shit you will reap what to sow.
This describes my new work place 100%! Never thought I’d have to deal with this shit in my 40’s.
Kris D I just got a new job and in two weeks, the HR/Trainer managed to get two cronies to team up on me with her.
Yup. I'll take hanging out with managers and IT geeks or flying solo over hanging out with a bunch of insecure b*tches
This is so true
Everything you said was the truth! When I started college I thought that I had left the mean girls in high school... unfortunately not but happy that I learned how to deal with them better. Success is the greatest revenge, so keep shining :)
+Tia Taylor ya, it's a sad reality check but as we grow up at least we learn how to handle it. Thank you!
Tia Taylor
What? This is not a Caleb video?
Chloe V hey outta here
Tia Taylor happens in the workplace for sure...and yes probably thats how they were in h.s those traits stick
Thank u so much this helps so much thank u ☺☺☺👏👋🤙🤜🤛
2 Timothy 1:7 For God did not give us the spirit of fear, but of power, love, self discipline.
K amen God is good
Amen!!!
YOU MEAN A LOT OF ME YOUR NICE PERSON.
Amen thank Lord
Praise Jesus. Also, Ephesians 6:12
12 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.
Has anyone ever told you look like Regina Hall! You're gorgeous!
You shouldn’t try to be friends w people who hate, bully and mistreat you tho….
They screaming out I want you to feel insecure about yourself so I bully you because I admire you
Great video but I do disagree with befriending them. Girls have literally lost their lives over frenemies. You can’t be friends with someone who’s jealous of you. PERIDOT. Just smile and keep it moving
Yup move on and when they try next time say “(name) you could be a little nicer”
This is wisdom. An envious soul is incapable of being your friend. You'd be a fool to trust them.
Absolutely agree with this.
True.
Totally agree.
But when I ignore them they keep on talking shit 😔😔
Maryoom I no right because they do it more and more
Mean girls feed off of your ignoring them. Confronting works best.
Although it sounds scary, it isn’t. You have to show them that you are not the one to be messed with! They prey on weakness/silence.
Maryoom
Just say to them "maybe you should shut up because everybody knows your a douchebag!"
Unfortunately, many see ignoring as sign of a perfect target.
Same
1. Take it as a compliment
2. Confront
3. Ignore
4. Do not dim your light
Thank you 😊 💓
I've learned to just ignore them and keep my distance. I no longer tolerate mean girls or envious behavior directed towards me. The moment I discern nasty or fake behavior from others especially women, I remove myself or the Lord removes them.
My issue is that, I wasn’t the main target of abuse but had to stand up to protect others who had no voice and now I fear that abuse will be solely focused on me.
I can’t stand seeing bullying and abuse. I tend to be a chicken when it comes to standing up for myself but a lion when defending others.
I’m really dreading facing them tomorrow. I’m going to have to fake being brave and just act like it doesn’t bother me.
Wish me luck 🙏
For whatever it's worth, that particular behavior of Yours is about as respectable as it gets. And the jerks do respect the Hell outta that kind of character and poise. They won't confess to it. But rest assured ... they most certainly do. They have to. They can't not.
Very Commendable.
Very Commendable.
~TD, Boston
A girl from my school (a popular girl) put on her Instagram story that she felt left out. I messaged her saying 'are you okay' and she just said 'piss off you're irrelevant'. Like, I just asked her whats wrong.
The fact that you reached out like that shows a compassionate good person
like what is wrong with some people
If I where you I would post a screenshot of that and show ppl who she really is
@@francislouis766 right, that’s how it’s done 😂👍
How obnoxious she is.
Obnoxious people should be irrelevant.😄
Thank you so much for this. I literally went through depression my whole life because my cousins, sisters and other girls around me wanted my blood no matter what I did. They copied what I did and how I dressed behind doors but spit in my face. I tried to be nice to people around me and I dimmed my light so much so girls would like me but it never worked. I had no one to help me fight these demons until I realized I was probably stronger than all of them and that’s why they always ganged up on me to gossip about me and i always felt like it was jealousy. Lately I’ve been able to block them out and it feels so good bc most of them want that power and attention and now I know that. I really wish I had this advice earlier in my life my it’s never too late!
Evabelle15 I’m praying for you sis. I KNOW HOW YOU FEEL! Peace and blessings love!
I’m happy you learned though I know how you feel as well. Let’s lift other girls/ women we feel may need the advice we now know.
This story is so inspiring. I'm a booking producer for a new talk show. I would love to hear more of your story. Message me on Instagram @itsbiancabee
Me tooo
SAME COUSINS ARE THE WORST
Insecurities are loud and confidence is quiet
Yeah. I tried the bonding thing. Nope. Besides I can't deal with a 44 year old toddler. So I just don't be bothered with her.
Tracey Marshall, totally my coworker smh. I tried and they use that opportunity just to dig their nails again
Look up NPD, lots on youtube
Idky older women still act like that, when are they gonna grow the fuck up? Probably never
Yup same crazy doesn't get "nice" or "compassion"
Tracey Marshall Me too I tried it too but they biotches kept being messy and petty and I couldn’t just deal I said I’m out!
Goku once said to Frieza "I don't know why you call people such mindless names it just shows how weak you are because it seems that's your only form of attacking people!!!"
*claps* preecher
Tell me why I read this comment in gokus voice lol
Be careful tho because sometimes they’ll try to physically fight u for no reason
Yup, I know girls like that.
Yeah it's really stupid.
Wish I saw this when I was 11...might've actually enjoyed my teenage years! Something that doesn't go away either when you grow up. I hope more young people see this and take note, very helpful xx
My thoughts exactly!
Sorry that happened to you young. It can be harder for confidence. Hugs.
Hello comment from 5 years ago
You turn into a teen when your 13 it even says it in the name
hahaha no way would I become friends with my mean girls click, I can't stand that type
meryl hickman Right! Because they all gone turn the hell on each other anyways!
Basically: ignore them and don’t make yourself look like a fool because you stooped to their level. If it seriously bothers you, then have a conversation in private to talk about your feelings to see if maybe there was a misunderstanding.
It's so true that you have to establish the respect factor as soon as possible or people WILL walk over you. Great video girl, don't dim your liiiight :)
+Jessica Lanie Amen! Thanks for watching! xo
HEY ZURI HALL! Hiiiii
I've dealt with the mean girl bully type before, and I feel they feel they look better than you, but if they really feel they are beautiful, why do they try to make other women feel less than, they must really not feel too good about themselves inside, plus alot of women are like really miserable these days, crazy but true
Mean girls are just jealous of you because you are better them so ignore them
I liked the poem. I was bullied today and I felt sick. I came home wanting to overcome this fear from abusive words. I started singing a song with the theme about words of anger and hate are only water on a duck's back to me. Singing it high gives the feeling of power and also claiming the oil of joy and gladness from the Holy Spirit to make my feathers water proof.
I’ve come to the conclusion they have low self esteem… end off.
Ignore them… just cast your care regarding them.
True your a threat.
They are negative they rarely see anything positive… I can’t be bothered with them.
I had one girl be vile she included flying monkeys to join in the Bulling I literally completely ignored them.
When I was told all the nasty gossip I never gave anything back, nada zilch
It had no where to go … it stopped.
This some great advice and it's so true, everything is done for a reason. The bully may be jealous...
99.99% of the time, it is because they're jealous or feel threatened by you. But that's really their problem, not ours. Keep shining.
There comes a point where ignoring is NOT a good tactic which ultimately taught me SHUT IT DOWN RIGHT AWAY👊🏻👊🏻
Facts
The confrontation advise is setting yourself up for failure. Most of the time they will not admit they have a problem with you and they will gaslight you even more. Also insinuating that you misinterpreted it gives them free room to play you and turn it around. No need in expecting honesty from an envious person. They will be too ashamed to admit and it would ruin their ego and false persona. Instead trust your gut and set some boundaries.
I'm almost 60, and I have to say that the experience with mean girls from grade school and high school, and some of college has been like PTSD. I still avoid them to this day. My mother told me it was all in my head, that I was overly sensitive, that I was imagining things. I didn't know it was jealousy and insecurity on their part until I saw the segment "Odd Girl Out." I was 40. My husband and I were watching it, and suddenly it just hit me and I burst out sobbing. I never knew! It all fit together. I cannot begin to tell you how it was to be all alone during that time of life. All because of one pretty little girl who saw me as a threat, and her minions followed, doing any of her bidding. I often look back and wonder how I could have handled the situation better. I dumbed down, I didn't dress well, I didn't wear makeup -- all in the hopes of not causing any competition. I couldn't even get a new pair of shoes without her ''punishing'' me by making sure I was excluded. Sound crazy? I know. But it's true. I can tell you that completely ignoring is the key. When they know you've been annoyed, that's when they know they've got you. But when you're young and don't have a mother who will guide you, sometimes you don't have the mental strength to keep going in that vein. It does work. NEVER let them see they've made an impact. NEVER. I had to learn it's okay to be alone and go your own way. Wish I'd had someone like Z.H. to tell me this when I was young. Thanks for a good video and good advice to these young ladies.
Thank you for these great tips. Some great, empowering quotes as well. When I am feeling the pressure from mean girls or adult bullies, I like to think of the quote "Great minds talk about ideas, average minds talk about events, and small minds talk about other people." Not sure who said it, but it reminds me to keep calm.
Eleanor Roosevelt. ❤️
I've learned two things:
Stop being too nice.
Set boundaries for yourself.
😃😃😃
So true 🙌
Love this video!! Excellent advice 😀
+GabeBabeTV thanks, glad you enjoyed!
Oh I do too. I like her responses to bullying
This is meant for teens. Not grown up women like me. Grown up women got no time to engage in fights confronting women who dont know how to behave classy. IGNORE has done for me over the years. Focus on better things!
Going through the comments before I read yours, you should rethink that. Older ppl get passes only bc they're more fragile. Well, some actually act like it and have actual wisdom to share. As far as you? You still seem healthy go back to my first sentence. Then proceed. Younger folks wanna learn ish not feel belittled. But yeah, I'm not that mean girl... So there's that. Maybe older ppl have their/ our... Different situations to priortize more but you know life never stops throwing u curveballs...
stay far away from the dental industry!!! its damn loaded with mean girls! i mean they should stress this more than anything else in dental assisting school! I left dental because of this. I mean 2 years of school and 40k of student loans. gone because I got so tired of being treated like crap and attacked by other girls that were so darn insecure about themselves, they would constantly pick on me or try to boss me around ( and they aint my boss) lol. Im in a better place now, but i can warn anyone to stay away from dental
I’ve heard the same things about nurses.
Ignoring is gold.
Its sad but especially in the black community we r so quick to put each other down....Roast each other or just simply hate on the next person for literally NO REASON!!! I've experienced this over and over this includes strangers that don't even know u. Ive learned ppl just feel like putting others down somehow makes them feel better....So i just ignore it but if they approach me threathening I'll take legal action
I have been through this for so long.. I felt I was ugly because all the kids at school said it but my family and friends always said I am good looking and that made me feel good.. once I turned 8 years old I got sick of being bullied, so I learned how to do Kung Fu.. when that happens now I smile and say god bless you and sometimes I laugh a long with them.. I'm a silly person but I'm quite as well.. when I listening to music sometimes I close my eyes and I use my mind to get away from the world or from bad people.. last time I close my eyes and listened to music, made up a world of my own my head..its nice
Your cute 😍😍
+Abbi Brownlove thank u.. it makes me feel good that someone thinks I'm cute..
-_-....who cares if you look ugly? it's the personality that matters.
Joey Jackson I was ugly to. But honey wait til I bloomed! You will too. Trust me.
Man I remember watching this 4 years ago to deal with a traumatic bullying situation in high school. Thanks for helping so many of us in that time of need!
I left my second job for mean girls. It was so overwhelming and lonely. I truly couldn't work in an environment like that and how cliquey it was. It happened at a University, I was working at during c19 smh
People only talk about you when you're jealous.
Amen, sister!! Thank you so much for sharing!!! I have learned that: mean girls will diminish in the brightness of you shining!
Early for once!!! I've been dealing with bullies since 3rd grade
Thank you so much for this! I have recently been diagnosed with anxiety and depression, because of problems at school. I appreciate this so much, this video was some well-needed therapy. 😘❤
Don't let them bother you I'm glad you getting therapy
These girls that I know are so mean and I cry after school when they do certain things and it really sucks I try to ignore them but it just seems like they are always there 😭
They can suck it up I’m just like you I sometimes care but it’s just better to say something.
Been suicidal over mean girls snd bullying for years. This video helped. Thank you! ❤️
I know how you feel 😔I hope you in better place in your life.
Me too girl.
This was so good! Dealing with this at work now. SHINE BRIGHT!
Thank you for this! Currently dealing with adult bullies in my life, and it has really been taking a toll. This video helps!
So basically there are 2 mean girls. Meangirl1 is friends with me and talks trash about meangirl2 when meangirl2 is sick. When meangirl2 is at school then meangirl1 goes to her and they bully me. Sometimes meangirl2 comes to me and were friends but then meangirl1 bullys me anyways. She said that im sassy(in a bad way) because i have an iphone (even though its one of the old ones) and because im wearing a choker. And once she said that i have to go to tiger and buy myself a brain (theres a shop flying tiger and they sell squishy brains)
I will take ur advise. I have mean girls in my food and beverage department there's a group of women cooks that give me dirty looks or look at me and laugh with someone by them. I overheard one of them say I'm going to eat all the pizza up. I heard them giggling. Our boss got a ton of pizza for our lunch meeting. I brushed it off but deep down it hurt. I hate having young n old woman at work being bullies and being awful. We need to lift each other up not bring anyone down. But I will just kill them with kindness or just avoid them.
Love, love, love your vibe and what you had to share in this video. Insecurity or malice fueled mean girl behavior has been something Ive experienced since early college and I could never wrap my brain around it. And sadly, I hate to say that it's been something Ive experienced most with other black women. It sincerely confuses and also hurts. Im about sharing a great vibe and learning about people. Women that are claws and teeth before they even know your name are so off putting. I love how you presented some strategies and also so inspo. Thanks chica!
Can we talk about how when you try to talk to those mean girls to understand why they’ve been behaving like that with you they blame you for starting drama and they also never give you proper explanation?
Gaslighting. I say it’s pretty much pointless to try and have a mature respectful conversation with people like this. Better if pouring that energy into yourself!
Wow! Thank you for this video, I have 2 daughters and they don't want to hear thi from me, I'm going to show this video and start the conversation now! Thank you for making this video!😘
Thank you so much for this video. I've been getting bullied at my school for about 3 years now. But meh I just don't care anymore. I start school in 2 days and meh I'm just going to ignore everyone and focus on school and my friends.
You are so pretty! Your videos always give me life. Thank you :-)
+Amena Yaman aww so glad you enjoy them, thanks!
Don't befriend demons. They are only interested in winning, not resolutions.
Seriously amazing girl! I wish I actually was someone that could shine but I’m not. With that said this was very helpful! I have been bullied my entire life from school to work and family. Time to cut them loose and listen to your videos lol 💜
Montsergirl my daughter is experiencing bullying as well. Hopefully things can get better x
I am so thankful that my school doesn’t have bullies
Girl this was so beautiful, you, your message, the quotes, you inspire me so much, watching this was like going to church! Thank you so much, this is EXACTLY what I needed in my life! Goddess bless you!
Thank you, it's been hard. I'm dealing with some younger mean girls in my nursing program. It's strange because I'm older lol 😂. I've been getting a lot of rolled eyes and catty remarks. I'm trying so hard to be friendly and kind. LOL I am trying really hard not to let my "old me" from when I was younger come out. 😂😂😂
I loved this video! It made me feel so much better and like I wasn't alone😊 it's good to know beautiful successful people like u go thru it too but there's always a way to get thru it! 👌🏽😌 great video!
46 year old woman here dealing with a mean girl. I've never even met this woman but she makes it very clear that she doesn't like me. Your video has some serious truth to it. Thank you!
Im the best student in class and i get alot of bullies Thank you so much beacuse u help me alot.
Wow, this is the best video on how to deal with bullies. You'd be surprised at how the so-called bully really likes you but doesn't know how to convey the message. Sometimes it's just a breach or break down in communication. Like always Zuri Hall this was awesome, great job!
I love the see it as a compliment. This is how I actually did see, before I caved into my insecurities. Now that I am feeling stronger. I see what you mean.
Some of my teammates from a skiing team bully me like...call me a pig,hit me and call me all kinds of different names...they always do that when our couch(es) arent there,i told my mom but she only said to "show my fangs" when they dont stop when i tell them to...she didnt do anything else,thats why i watched this video...to be completely honest this really made my day and i think ill try to use this awesome advice you've told me! Thanks a lot!❤
My best friend well my ex best friend turned out to be a mean girl and a bully.
Hi my name is Yasmin and when I was little Like about in 1 and 2 Grade my whole class bullied me and my teacher and my parents were worried about my safety and they reported the school principal and she told "everything is going to alright and she said she's going to fire the teacher and talk to the parents who bullied me and a few years later I'm in Middle school and a girl named Abby bullied me last year school year and my parents\Friends and my Siblings gave me some advice but tomorrow is my first day of 7th grade and you gave some Really good advice you'll help me to stand out my bully Abby and going to be a cheerleader in school God bless and thank you!:-) From yasmin
@zurihall you my dear need to do more of that. I woke up with anxiety this morning and your vlog changed my energy to positive . Your tips were what I needed this morning. I am so thankful to follow you!!!!!!!! Thank you and God bless you girl all the way from Montreal !!! Xo ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
+Marjorie Joasil aww, I'm so glad it helped start your day on a positive note!! God bless! xoxo
This us a great message! Thank you! I love the most is the tip to not dim your light, something that i normally feel as if i need to do to make way for others to not feel bad
Thank you. This video made me cry because it was extremely helpful. It helped me and made me feel soooooooo much better.
Im so glad someone said more then just only saying "stop bullying"
I love this video I just watched, i just posted it on my Facebook page as well , I just transferred job depts. and dealing with mean females in my new dept . This video you made really helps me look at the brighter side of things 😉💕
Hi, Zuri! I just wanted to let you know how much this video means to me. I dm'd you a few months ago in a time where I was really struggling with people like this and allowed mean girls to chip away at my self esteem. Not only did you respond with a really encouraging message but you made a video and it's so so so inspiring to see all that you've done. So, TYSM I hope things continue to go up for you :) x
What a fun way to shed light on a dark topic. I love your humor, (vacuum joke) throughout. Smile!
Its not just that Zuri. I have found that most of the mean girls/ bullies now are people who were really insecure/ rejected/ bullied at school, subconsiously trying to get their own back at kids who were more popular/ seen to be pretty, girls who the guys liked at school etc
the quotes at the end made me cry ;-;
Ignoring them is the best advice. You can't force people to like you by going to everyone who talks bad about you and telling them to like you or that you angry. You said they want attention and they shouldn't be given any. They are miserable.
I tried the befriend one and it ended up with her in tears 😭 ummmm (she is the bully I promise 😂)
It’s better to have no friends than fake friends.
@@nejray7420 Amen to that 🙏 🙌
Preachhh!!!!!!! Shout out to you and thank you!!!!!
Thank you so much for doing this video!! I so need this right now!! I'm going through the exact same thing at work, there are these two women, grown-ass women I should add, who I do not get on with at all!! They are really bitchy, snobby and stuck up and I can't stand them!!! I get no support from my boss, who used to stick up for me, and now he's taking their side!!!! I've decided to look for another job as I cannot stand working there anymore, and have recently started a new course so now I'm focused on that!!!
This is why I just prefer not to deal with women outside of my Mom. I've been through enough with them throughout my life. They're a whole headache🤦🏾♀️. No thanks💯.
So me and my friends have this huge group and we hang out a lot. We call ourselves "The Squad". There was this one girl in our group who always tries to act tough and is a huge wannabe. She's been picking on my bff at school and outside of school. A few years back in December, my friend called everyone but that one girl and invited us to her b-day party that night. It was a late invite but we all still went. One of our other friends asked "hey....where's Jacqueline? Did you invite her too?" I'm like "guys let's just go..." My bff said "I don't want her to come. Let's just go inside" but my friend insisted and went all the way up the hill to go get her. Me, my bff, and my cousin were like "ugh omg your joking" when she came down the hill. Ofc we played pretend and acted all nice to her. We went inside her house and sat at her table while my bff's older sister started taking photos of us and stuff. She wanted to do a dance competition and she said whoever has the best dance gets to be on her IG. Ofc I flat-out refused and so did my cousin. After, SHE started to take over the competition and started shaking her hips and stuff while my bff's sister joined her and was like "woo let's go Jacqueline!" The rest of us were just looking at each other like "wtf..." and we just watched her with attitude bc she looked dumb asf. My bff started groaning and I'm like to everyone "ok next year we ain't invitin that bitch" and we all just started laughing and after, SHE had the nerve to make fun of my friend bc she didn't wanna dance. My friend was like "look, it's my birthday party, not yours ok? I never invited you. STOP CRASHING EVERYONE'S FUN-" and I stood in between them and I was like "ok ok shush" while everyone else was like "ooooooh...." SHE looked like she wanted to jump her so I'm like "just leave her alone. Nobody wants you here anyways" and SHE'S like "umm excuse me?! Nobody wants you here!" I clapped back and was like "at least I was actually INVITED" and everyone was like "OOOOOOOHHHH SHIIIIIIT". SHE'S such a bitch and we all think so
The “squad”sounds like bullies hun
When you’re watching videos like this, there’s this feeling you get like “I don’t need to watch this” . ITS TRYING TO STOP YOU FROM LEARNING DONT LISTEN TO IT YOU NEED IT
I love and admire your spirit! ❤️
Sooooo no big deal, but I named my baby sister Zuri too!
Btw my name is ZuZu ⭐️
Just got bullied and harassed very badly at school today, now I’m here 🤪
Omg girl im so sorry to hear that i hope you told someone about it how are you doing now ? If you need someone to talk to i will listen
WHAT IF IT’S A TEACHER THAT IS THE BULLY?
If a teacher is bothering and bullying you, speak out to everyone that you can. Please don't keep it quiet.
@@BreeBerzerker so true you should tell your principle of headteacher about it and get it sorted by your bully teachers boss
Please talk to your parents if you're still in grade school
I told my mom and let’s just say not even the principal looks at me now. My mom handled that teacher like she was a mob boss. 3 year ago and no one even looks me and my sister in the eyes when they see us .... they are scared of off now
I work in education and it is full of mean girls. I would document everything nasty she says or does to you. Then, take this information to the principal. If there are other students experiencing the same, get them to document it and report it as well.
Been going through a lot with girls trying disgust themselves as friends and etc. Thanks for reminding me to never shrink myself. I truly truly needed this. I'm going to listen daily until I build the strength to make your words action. Thank you!
aww...you totally blessed the world with this video!! love it. thankyou for sharing Zuri!!
+Shanadriab you're welcome, thanks for watching!
Thank you SO much for this. It really resonated with me❤
It was my first day at work today. I am an IA (instructional assistant) that is pursuing to be a teacher, and so thankful for it! The kids are so fun and inspirational. A girl even gave me a unicorn drawing. I was having such a good, happy time getting to know all of the kids, some parents, teachers and staff. AND THEN: one of the other IA's storms into the lunch room (where I was at) and commands me to immediately start cleaning tables. Mind you, I asked if I could clean tables earlier and was told not to do it from another IA. Mind you, it was my first day. Mind you, she was so condescending. I was talking to a student and was interrupted by this person, to be commanded to immediately clean tables (something I would love to help with, but please, why can't she ask nicely?). It really made the rest of my day and night horrible. Because she didn't stop there. She even went as far as yelling my name, pointing her finger, and shooting daggers with her eyes at me to tell me which child I should be helping. Going to talk with the principal about this tomorrow.
The saddest part is that she doesn't even care about the students because when I tried being friendly and asked about her day, she said, "another day, another dollar." This makes me feel so sad for the kids. Teachers and staff should care about their school. Think of it from a parents perspective. What parent would want their kid to go to a school that has cranky staff members who only care about getting paid?...
Guess I need to learn to talk back, stronger. I did ask to talk with her when we were done with the lunch room, but she interrupted me when I was trying to express that I didn't like the way I was treated and then when I asked if everything was ok, she responded with, "if you're feeling a hectic vibe, then that's good. It's supposed to be hectic"
And then I got a backhanded apology. She said, "sorry, but I'm just trying to make sure you know what to do when I'm out on vacation in March because you'll be all by yourself."
BUT that still does not give the right to yell at me! Especially, not in front of a student.
Wow, I didn't think I'd write so much lol Gosh, wish I wasn't bothered by this ridiculous event