For questions to be answered in the comments, please give a "super thanks" or head over to my website & ask there. 𝕊𝕜𝕚𝕝𝕝 𝕆𝕗 𝔸𝕥𝕥𝕣𝕒𝕔𝕥𝕚𝕠𝕟 Men's Advice Community: soa.fm Private relationship/dating coaching: soa.fm/dating-relationship-coaching/ Questions or feedback: soa.fm/contact/ Get Your Ex Back: 45dayreattraction.com ✔ SOA APPROVED COACHING PROGRAMS 𝗙𝗿𝗶𝗲𝗻𝗱𝘀 𝗪𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝗕𝗲𝗻𝗲𝗳𝗶𝘁𝘀 How To Get A Sex Buddy: bit.ly/3Mitohu 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗦𝗰𝗿𝗮𝗺𝗯𝗹𝗲𝗿 Turn a Girl Friend into a Girlfriend: bit.ly/3Kf9EJt 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗧𝗮𝗼 𝗢𝗳 𝗕𝗮𝗱𝗮𝘀𝘀 How To Attract ANY Woman: bit.ly/35Jyx0W 𝗣𝗮𝘀𝘀𝗶𝗼𝗻𝗮𝘁𝗲 𝗦𝗲𝘅 𝗟𝗶𝗳𝗲 Get The Sex Life You Deserve: bit.ly/3K9bI5V
I love you = I love you RIGHT NOW. When my ex ended it, I just said something like this: it’s sad that you feel that way, if this is truly what you want Then I respect your choice. I wish you all the best. I then disappeared, went no contact and cried my eyes out in the shower. I didn’t beg, plead or show weakness. I discussed it with the guys over a few beers instead. 2 weeks later she reached out and said that she misses me. Women often say this when they cheat as well.
Correct, women typically act based on the emotions they're feeling IN THAT MOMENT. It's not that they're lying, only expressing the emotions they're feeling right then. That's always subject to change. However, that doesn't mean that just because she's not feeling love for you that moment that she will go run off with another guy. In this video what I'm talking about is in the long term; when couples become more like good friends or roommates, & no longer lovers.
Skill of Attraction and because of this channel and a few others i helped some friends with their gfs as well as improving my skills. It’s largely about identifying how we behave around women.
@@narcfreeatlast6975 Yes, correct. If a woman likes you or is attracted to you, your job is really just to not mess it up by behaving weak, or on the flip side, domineering or cold.
You did the right thing. But I couldn't ever envisage taking her back. Once she ends it, then it is ended. Even if she later comes back, it will never be the same.
Skill of Attraction Yes you’re right, Coach I have that one girl I’ve fucked up with a month ago, now we started talking back, should I initiate contact every week or every 3-4 days?
My wife had quoted this saying twice a year for over 20 years. I then only give her 25% of my sexual powers because of that phrase. She enjoys it, and says I'm the best
Yeah, if she's not holding up her end you want to get out. You'll only wear yourself out trying to maintain the relationship. However, IF you love her, it's always best to tell her first, that how she's showing up in the relationship isn't working for you. Then give her a little time to rectify the situation. If she doesn't take the opportunity to pick up the slack, then end it.
To be dominant in a relationship you must be the one who leads the relationship; be assertive, be decisive, be her emotional rock, call the shots. However, you do this in a way where she is free to join you or not, but either way you are doing what you must. It's NOT being controlling & domineering.
M 34 ( Scorpio ) my ex gf F 31 ( Sagittarius ) my ex broke up w/ my on 11/12/22 " She told me I love you, but not in love w/ you " It's so weird she invited me to visit her parents & bff on 10/26/22 - 10/30/22 & came home move in w/ her for barely a week than she keep me out her appt than she broke up w/ me. We were together 1 year & 4 months
It sounds like the invite to her parents was her final attempt at hoping the relationship will work. When women breakup with a man it's usually a longtime coming, all along hoping that something will change, because the truth is, they don't really want to breakup. I have a lot of videos on how/why women lose interest & attraction in a man that may help you figure out the real reason. Figuring that out will help you from making that mistake again.
Typically, an older man is quite attractive to younger women, because these men usually have their act together & are already established. I dated a 24yo when I was 40 & she was totally into it & the age difference never phased her. The problem a lot of men have with this is, that they become insecure about younger men, which ultimately drives her away. So, I recommend to ask her out. If she mentions anything about the age difference, don't take it seriously. Flash a cocky smirk & respond with something witty (& a little cocky). Being independent of an outcome is key.
Me and my ex broke up last year, it's been 6 months of no contact. Last contact she got mad because I couldn't see her when she wanted me to, so she decided to not reach out or give me any plans. Today its her birthday, and it's also a day where we had our first time, a special day for the both of us and where she was the happiest when I had a surprise for her. I feel really hurt and sad for not reaching out..I didn't wish her happy birthday last year after the breakup. Am I doing the right thing by not wishing her happy birthday?
Yes, you are. I know it feels strange not to reach out to her(that's old 'nice guy' programming), but keep in mind her past behavior...& she hasn't reached out to you in 6 months.
I had a girl tell me once I have love for you just not the type of love you deserve low key looking back on it it really sounded like she was saying her heart belonged to someone else cause she moved on very quick an never tried to come back
Skill of Attraction yea it really is the icing on the cake was when I saw on her instagram she had a new man hugged up under her had to block her I couldn’t bare to see that shit
What do I do when I’m in a one sided relationship with a girl who acts like we are in a relationship sometimes but has dating apps, goes to clubs and hangs out with guy friends who have tried to make a move on her before. We have an on and off relationship for about a year. I’ve lost a lot of power in the relationship by not enforcing my boundaries, being needy, etc etc and I can’t take it anymore. I want to change the relationship but it feels like it’s too far gone. When I try to talk to her she doesn’t want to talk or compromise on any of the problems I have with her and our relationship. What do I do?
Yes, I've been in a similar situation before & I learned that the more that you accept this dynamic & a relationship that you don't really like, the more respect (& attraction) she'll lose for you...thus, the more power you lose. Honestly, the best thing you can do here is to end it. She's not taking you seriously, & it's not changing...probably getting worse...so why stay? It's a terrible idea to stay in a bad or lukewarm relationship just because you love her. It's only slowly tearing down your self esteem & probably making you more needy. While this isn't the same situation, I think you'll find this video somewhat enlightening: ruclips.net/video/rIDJDFQc32Q/видео.html If you do decide to end it, it's going to hurt...& it'll probably hurt for a while. But it's also painful to stay. You have a better chance a great relationship by finding a new girl who actually shows you respect & doesn't feel the need to interact with other men. Plus, by you ending it you take a lot of your power back & earn her respect back. On some level she knows that you're not happy with her, but because you're not doing anything about it, she's taking full advantage of getting free attention from you. Basically, she's treating you like a back-up & no man should ever tolerate that.
@@SkillofAttraction she definitely knows I’m not happy. And since we aren’t together I technically don’t have the right to tell her she can’t do any of those things and it shows she doesn’t want to be in a fully committed relationship . She’s told me before she wouldn’t continue our relationship if I did things with another girl and that she doesn’t want to do anything with anyone else , but she continues to have dating apps(which she says she won’t do anything with anyone), go to clubs and get drunk often( which she says she has self control and won’t do anything either but she has kissed guys before while we were on one of our off periods), and she also has been hanging out with a guy friend that kissed her while we were on a break as well(even though she told me the context of why he kissed her and how it was a mistake and he apologized). Even if I gave her the benefit of the doubt with all these things and she ended up being completely innocent and not doing anything, she knows it bothers me and doesn’t have enough respect or care for me to want to change these things because I continue to stay with her. Is having one final conversation with her worth it?
@@gabynyy12 See, she's putting rules on you, but doesn't hold herself to the same standards. She's TELLING you nothing else is going on, but her actions are showing that, at the very least, she's open to it (she's on dating apps, but saying she won't actually do anything. Then why is she on them?). Honestly, it sounds like she enjoys your attention & the security of having someone...until a better option comes along. If you're okay with her potentially going on dates &/or hooking up, then I'd just distance myself & date other women, keeping her as a backup or a FWB. If you're not okay with that, regardless of whether or not your relationship is official, I'd just tell her that you love/care for her, but this arrangement isn't working for you, & that you're not interested in being an option or Plan B with her. If you've talked to her about this stuff in the past, you can remind her that you've tried talking to her about this, but nothing has changed. Then tell her that if she's ever interested in something less casual (don't bring up commitment or relationship), she should contact you & if you're still available you two can see how it goes. Don't get angry, don't raise your voice. And whatever you decide, stick with it unless she proves herself. Remember, pay more attention to her actions, than her words...her actions are the truth & her words must align must align with the in order to believe her words. Then go no contact. We often stay in unfulfilling, unhappy relationships due to the fantasy we've created about our partner & our future together. That makes it difficult to leave. But, you have to take that out of the equation & think about yourself, your happiness, & your future. A girl that wants the relationship to work will be working at it. If she just got a little complacent, but still wants it to work...a breakup will have her running back, doing whatever it takes to earn you back. I know a breakup is scary, but you will have your answer afterwards. She may not make a move immediately, but she WILL do something about it relatively soon if she values you & the relationship, because she doesn't want to risk losing you forever.
It's extremely difficult to maintain a LDR unless you both make a conscious effort to see each other somewhat regularly &/or you're making plans to come together. I know you don't want to hear this, but you would better off investing your time, energy & emotions into a girl that is closer to you.
That sucks, dude. Just don't chase her, beg or plead. Channel your pain into developing yourself & building your value; pursue your goals/hobbies, health/fitness, building your social circle & meeting new people. Remind yourself that YOU are the prize & it's her loss.
For questions to be answered in the comments, please give a "super thanks" or head over to my website & ask there.
𝕊𝕜𝕚𝕝𝕝 𝕆𝕗 𝔸𝕥𝕥𝕣𝕒𝕔𝕥𝕚𝕠𝕟
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𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗦𝗰𝗿𝗮𝗺𝗯𝗹𝗲𝗿
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𝗣𝗮𝘀𝘀𝗶𝗼𝗻𝗮𝘁𝗲 𝗦𝗲𝘅 𝗟𝗶𝗳𝗲
Get The Sex Life You Deserve: bit.ly/3K9bI5V
I love you = I love you RIGHT NOW.
When my ex ended it, I just said something like this: it’s sad that you feel that way, if this is truly what you want Then I respect your choice. I wish you all the best. I then disappeared, went no contact and cried my eyes out in the shower. I didn’t beg, plead or show weakness. I discussed it with the guys over a few beers instead.
2 weeks later she reached out and said that she misses me.
Women often say this when they cheat as well.
Correct, women typically act based on the emotions they're feeling IN THAT MOMENT. It's not that they're lying, only expressing the emotions they're feeling right then. That's always subject to change. However, that doesn't mean that just because she's not feeling love for you that moment that she will go run off with another guy. In this video what I'm talking about is in the long term; when couples become more like good friends or roommates, & no longer lovers.
Skill of Attraction and because of this channel and a few others i helped some friends with their gfs as well as improving my skills. It’s largely about identifying how we behave around women.
@@narcfreeatlast6975 Yes, correct. If a woman likes you or is attracted to you, your job is really just to not mess it up by behaving weak, or on the flip side, domineering or cold.
You did the right thing. But I couldn't ever envisage taking her back. Once she ends it, then it is ended. Even if she later comes back, it will never be the same.
Space is by far the most important thing in a relationship, you really have to give a girl space sometimes...
True. But you also don't want to become complacent, because a woman will lose attraction then too.
Skill of Attraction Yes you’re right, Coach I have that one girl I’ve fucked up with a month ago, now we started talking back, should I initiate contact every week or every 3-4 days?
This means "It's over, I'm leaving soon"
Pretty much.
My wife had quoted this saying twice a year for over 20 years. I then only give her 25% of my sexual powers because of that phrase. She enjoys it, and says I'm the best
I was in a LTR for 2 years and though she wasn't saying the words her actions said ILYBINILWY. I ended it
Yeah, if she's not holding up her end you want to get out. You'll only wear yourself out trying to maintain the relationship. However, IF you love her, it's always best to tell her first, that how she's showing up in the relationship isn't working for you. Then give her a little time to rectify the situation. If she doesn't take the opportunity to pick up the slack, then end it.
Only water boys have their hearts flowing.
Get off the bench and start playing.
Exactly!
"think about how a girl feels about her dog" LMAO, that was brutal
Haha!
Eric, what does exactly mean to be dominant AND what are the traits? Im a little confuse about that. Thanks for all your work, its amazing.
To be dominant in a relationship you must be the one who leads the relationship; be assertive, be decisive, be her emotional rock, call the shots. However, you do this in a way where she is free to join you or not, but either way you are doing what you must. It's NOT being controlling & domineering.
Thank You Chief
You're welcome, sir!
M 34 ( Scorpio ) my ex gf F 31 ( Sagittarius ) my ex broke up w/ my on 11/12/22 " She told me I love you, but not in love w/ you " It's so weird she invited me to visit her parents & bff on 10/26/22 - 10/30/22 & came home move in w/ her for barely a week than she keep me out her appt than she broke up w/ me. We were together 1 year & 4 months
It sounds like the invite to her parents was her final attempt at hoping the relationship will work. When women breakup with a man it's usually a longtime coming, all along hoping that something will change, because the truth is, they don't really want to breakup. I have a lot of videos on how/why women lose interest & attraction in a man that may help you figure out the real reason. Figuring that out will help you from making that mistake again.
Just move on simple.
Simple in theory...
What's your opinion on age difference....I've known a girl for a while now and get on really well so I want to ask her out ...I'm 44 and she's 23
Typically, an older man is quite attractive to younger women, because these men usually have their act together & are already established. I dated a 24yo when I was 40 & she was totally into it & the age difference never phased her. The problem a lot of men have with this is, that they become insecure about younger men, which ultimately drives her away. So, I recommend to ask her out. If she mentions anything about the age difference, don't take it seriously. Flash a cocky smirk & respond with something witty (& a little cocky). Being independent of an outcome is key.
@@SkillofAttraction thank you sir.👍
Me and my ex broke up last year, it's been 6 months of no contact. Last contact she got mad because I couldn't see her when she wanted me to, so she decided to not reach out or give me any plans. Today its her birthday, and it's also a day where we had our first time, a special day for the both of us and where she was the happiest when I had a surprise for her. I feel really hurt and sad for not reaching out..I didn't wish her happy birthday last year after the breakup.
Am I doing the right thing by not wishing her happy birthday?
Yes, you are. I know it feels strange not to reach out to her(that's old 'nice guy' programming), but keep in mind her past behavior...& she hasn't reached out to you in 6 months.
Yes
I had a girl tell me once I have love for you just not the type of love you deserve low key looking back on it it really sounded like she was saying her heart belonged to someone else cause she moved on very quick an never tried to come back
Unfortunately, when women say things like, "I can't you the love you deserve" is a way of letting you down easy.
Skill of Attraction yea it really is the icing on the cake was when I saw on her instagram she had a new man hugged up under her had to block her I couldn’t bare to see that shit
Can't say I blame you. I wouldn't want to see that either...
What do I do when I’m in a one sided relationship with a girl who acts like we are in a relationship sometimes but has dating apps, goes to clubs and hangs out with guy friends who have tried to make a move on her before. We have an on and off relationship for about a year. I’ve lost a lot of power in the relationship by not enforcing my boundaries, being needy, etc etc and I can’t take it anymore. I want to change the relationship but it feels like it’s too far gone. When I try to talk to her she doesn’t want to talk or compromise on any of the problems I have with her and our relationship. What do I do?
Yes, I've been in a similar situation before & I learned that the more that you accept this dynamic & a relationship that you don't really like, the more respect (& attraction) she'll lose for you...thus, the more power you lose. Honestly, the best thing you can do here is to end it. She's not taking you seriously, & it's not changing...probably getting worse...so why stay? It's a terrible idea to stay in a bad or lukewarm relationship just because you love her. It's only slowly tearing down your self esteem & probably making you more needy. While this isn't the same situation, I think you'll find this video somewhat enlightening: ruclips.net/video/rIDJDFQc32Q/видео.html
If you do decide to end it, it's going to hurt...& it'll probably hurt for a while. But it's also painful to stay. You have a better chance a great relationship by finding a new girl who actually shows you respect & doesn't feel the need to interact with other men. Plus, by you ending it you take a lot of your power back & earn her respect back. On some level she knows that you're not happy with her, but because you're not doing anything about it, she's taking full advantage of getting free attention from you. Basically, she's treating you like a back-up & no man should ever tolerate that.
@@SkillofAttraction she definitely knows I’m not happy. And since we aren’t together I technically don’t have the right to tell her she can’t do any of those things and it shows she doesn’t want to be in a fully committed relationship . She’s told me before she wouldn’t continue our relationship if I did things with another girl and that she doesn’t want to do anything with anyone else , but she continues to have dating apps(which she says she won’t do anything with anyone), go to clubs and get drunk often( which she says she has self control and won’t do anything either but she has kissed guys before while we were on one of our off periods), and she also has been hanging out with a guy friend that kissed her while we were on a break as well(even though she told me the context of why he kissed her and how it was a mistake and he apologized). Even if I gave her the benefit of the doubt with all these things and she ended up being completely innocent and not doing anything, she knows it bothers me and doesn’t have enough respect or care for me to want to change these things because I continue to stay with her. Is having one final conversation with her worth it?
@@gabynyy12 See, she's putting rules on you, but doesn't hold herself to the same standards. She's TELLING you nothing else is going on, but her actions are showing that, at the very least, she's open to it (she's on dating apps, but saying she won't actually do anything. Then why is she on them?). Honestly, it sounds like she enjoys your attention & the security of having someone...until a better option comes along. If you're okay with her potentially going on dates &/or hooking up, then I'd just distance myself & date other women, keeping her as a backup or a FWB. If you're not okay with that, regardless of whether or not your relationship is official, I'd just tell her that you love/care for her, but this arrangement isn't working for you, & that you're not interested in being an option or Plan B with her. If you've talked to her about this stuff in the past, you can remind her that you've tried talking to her about this, but nothing has changed. Then tell her that if she's ever interested in something less casual (don't bring up commitment or relationship), she should contact you & if you're still available you two can see how it goes. Don't get angry, don't raise your voice. And whatever you decide, stick with it unless she proves herself. Remember, pay more attention to her actions, than her words...her actions are the truth & her words must align must align with the in order to believe her words. Then go no contact.
We often stay in unfulfilling, unhappy relationships due to the fantasy we've created about our partner & our future together. That makes it difficult to leave. But, you have to take that out of the equation & think about yourself, your happiness, & your future. A girl that wants the relationship to work will be working at it. If she just got a little complacent, but still wants it to work...a breakup will have her running back, doing whatever it takes to earn you back. I know a breakup is scary, but you will have your answer afterwards. She may not make a move immediately, but she WILL do something about it relatively soon if she values you & the relationship, because she doesn't want to risk losing you forever.
What about when it's the so call husband who says this?
Same, really. Loves you & cares about you as a person, but has lost attraction.
How can i give her more of my time, love and my full support? Long Distance Relationship
It's extremely difficult to maintain a LDR unless you both make a conscious effort to see each other somewhat regularly &/or you're making plans to come together. I know you don't want to hear this, but you would better off investing your time, energy & emotions into a girl that is closer to you.
@@SkillofAttraction we just broke up like 20mins ago, i feel like my whole world ended..
That sucks, dude. Just don't chase her, beg or plead. Channel your pain into developing yourself & building your value; pursue your goals/hobbies, health/fitness, building your social circle & meeting new people. Remind yourself that YOU are the prize & it's her loss.
Sounds like every girl I know
Making some adjustments in how you interact with women can change that.
🇦🇱🇦🇱🇽🇰🇽🇰