Is there really a concept of me before environment reflects me? My personality is the interface between my being and the other. So of course I can't remember such a thing before society told me what it is and how should it be, even the idea of me come to being because of the language and behaviours that I acquired from society. Eveything is connected and interdependent. But my reaction to that imposition is not passive acceptance either.
I walk early every morning with my dogs, I now say good morning and hello to the trees, bushes, birds, plants and various others forms of life, for without them you and I wouldn’t be here, take the time if even for a short moment just to look and see what we would normally take for granted and appreciate life as nature should be appreciated, it is a gift from the universe and should be respected.
@Metanoia Many believe God and the universe are the same thing. Its just language. If this video resonates with you and you see it talking about a disconnection largely from God and someone else thinks a disconnection from the universe, you are in agreement as far as I'm concerned. Try not to get hung up on terminology and like he says: "trust your gut".
@@JackCooksonMusic Kiaora.That is awesome how you picked up on those areas of disconnection, and how an argument can start immediately, just based on some difference in how 2 people have come to see the explanations for the wonders of our world or just the terms people use. Awesome food for thought. Kiaora again from New Zealand.
1. Alienated from nature 2. Alienated from people 3. Alienated from creativity 4. Alienated from self/gut feeling > products are sold to fill the gaps, but fail
1. Nature is a bitch who should be placed firmly under the heel of mankind 2. Only the intelligent feel alienated from other people, the rest are fools and get along just fine 3. True creativity is illegal, legal creativity is immoral 4. Refer to number 3. And you're right about the products. But it is nice to by things every now and again.
@@inquisitorkrieger8171 on your no. 1 mate don't forget if we screw with nature and we are - big time it deals with us firmly in its own way remember the dinosaurs? You make it sound like nature's some beast that needs to be tamed like a lion - put it in a cage. Err.......
"We're actually wired for empathy - even rats are wired for empathy. When you stress out rats in a laboratory by shocking their feet with electricity, they're more stressed watching other rats being shocked than when they're shocked themselves. Contrary to the myth in our culture that we're separated, aggressive, competitive creatures, we're actually wired for empathy, for connection, for love, for compassion. So really, to move forward, all we have to do is to get back to our true nature."
So true. Recently I thought something about my collegue at work that made me feel bad for her but it turns out I didnt know all the facts and she is doig better than I thought and made me so happy. We truly do want to see people happy.
@@kakasenfman True that but we can do something in our power.Atleast we should start from our family,friends, colleagues, acquaintances.From this group atleast a few will understand your empathy and try to implement the same and a ripple will form.After all it took centuries for us to lose our empathy and come to this hopeless condition,so if we start slowly atleast our future generations will get to see the real humanity.
I have always believed that economy is based on alienating people .When people are together they need too few things to feel good and enjoy themselves .When they are apart they are unhappy and empty so they buy things to feel better .We dont need things ,we are not consumers ,we are Human beings ,we just need each other.
I replied thumbs down to (I thought) the comment that follows yours about so many people over 50 being in the audience - very sorry. I had already given you a thumbs up. I am in my 70's, work from home for a wonderful humanitarian organization., but the work is so overwhelming and I'm so far behind after a bad accident it freaks me daily. So I'm somewhere close to being on the same page as you. Great comment, Mahesa!
Hope you're okay, try and make time to go on walks in nature if there's any nearby you, remember the present moment is more valuable than future or past ❤️
Atoms in the universe only bond when both "think" that the new bond is advantagious for them. They only share an electron when it gets them closer to "Equilibrium". Its the same with human connection. Always there has to be something in the middle of a connection, a thing that both partys want. So think about what you are willing to provide to people and go and search for people that need it. Good luck ;-)
darude sandstorm I can recognize The Truth when I read it. I make it where I’m given a “secret” and today I found it here. How can I find out more bc it makes perfect sense. Everything is down hill with God. Nothing I want is uphill
Yet I bet if I approached you in the street you'd freak out. Relationships take time. We have to be around people. Get to know them. And then maintain healthy relationships with people. Relationships go bad if not worked on.
School is where we learn to ignore our gut feelings and sometimes listen to teachers who don't give a damn about us and get us in trouble when we go with our gut because they've lost the ability to do so.
Teachers are failures in real life, they work for shit money filling kids with mostly useless and unnecessary knowledge. Its basically indoctrination from the young age so you can become a good corporate slave, follower.
@@guitar-jo Agreed. The school system though is fundamentally corrupt even if there are a few genuine really good teachers here and there the system doesn't promote that kind of behavior.
Most teachers do care. They are operating under a system that does not allow them the freedom they need to be effective. They use their own money to purchase school supplies. They notify help when a child is being abused. You have a lot of anger in your heart.
At 46 yr old you described the last 40 years of my life. I am a man out of time, a stranger in a strange land. EVERYTHING I was taught to care about and make me happy, a career, a home, a family, I have never had any interest in, especially working a job. I feel that I was meant to live a solitary life and unfortunately have been immersed in a society I care nothing about.
I read you Tyson. I’m 49yr old, I was much happier younger but the older I get the more distorted the world seems to appear. I had a few friends but you keep sensing one-up-man-ship going on and it’s toxic. I’m an engineer, and found that by studying new methods I give my self a sense of purpose and improved mental self esteem. I care less about what people think of me, societal expectaions are impossible to meet these days. I’ve never had a dog or a cat but I sure as hell would consider it in the future plus maybe learning to play a guitar properly. I feel for you, I take care of my Mom who has separated from my Dad 20 years ago. They were so unhappy together. I saw Back to the Future again over Christmas 2020, and thought if I could do one thing, I’d stop my Mom marrying my Dad. I told that to my Dad today. He wasn’t happy, but he could see that time had eroded my natural smile.
@@prosimulate Tena koe. I was just trying to find some friends I made here a few months ago. But I got side tracked and read some interesting comments, including yours. It is good to re evaluate our lives, especially at our age when it is probably half over. Your "new methods" sound interesting. I also don't care nearly as much what others think of me. It is so very liberating. As for one-up-man-ship. I thought that was a man thing. But I expect that with confidence, age, maturity, wisdom and humility, I think it declines. Women seem to have a different way of operating, which involves connecting more, but they can alienate other women as well. I wanted to mention some ideas that might help move the corners of your mouth up again. Firstly, thankyou for your compassion for your mother. In my mind, and heart, compassion goes hand in hand with connection. I mention that because of the beautiful and insightful lecture we have seen from Gabor Mate. All of my life I have been very affected by the suffering of others. I myself have had a lot of suffering in my life. I guess that is why I was an empath right from the start of it all. Within the last few years, I was again hit with some stuff I would never have expected or believed could happen. It was possibly the worst of all the biggest challenges of my life. But, everso wonderfully, I learned a lot. A real, real lot. I searched for answers and I found them. I would be writing all night if I were to list or describe them. The insights, personal growth and spiritual ascension has actually made the years of my hell, all worthwhile. I lost so much, but at the end of the day, it actually, what I gained was more precious than all that I lost. I like to think that your Mum has had many good times, and that she learned a lot, and is at eace with the chices she made. I stayed in 3 unsatisfactory relationships. The last one lasted 17 years and I cared for him at home when he was dying. But not long after, I met a really lovely man. I often wonder if I was somehow prepared for better things. All we have is today, and hopefully tomorrow and beyond. Yesterday is gone, but we can cultivate joy right now. I was listening to a song again yesterday 'Just an illusion', by Julie Zahra. Some things I dedicated a lot of my life to were an ilusion. I will finish my speel when I have time.
@@prosimulate Hello again. I just wish you well on your journey. Expectations from society are not aligned with what is good for ourselves, others or the planet. There is so much disconnection. But we do not have to conform to the shallow areas of expectations, as you know. Victor Frankl understood that suffering is fine if there is meaning in it. Buddhists are good at thinking positively about suffering. By the time your mother separated from your father she would have been very clear on what she did not want in her life. She would have, I think, marvelled at her newfound freedom. She will have directed her own life and learned her own lessons, as we all do, without complications from your father. I am extremely lucky that I choose to forgive others. I have nothing but appreciation for both parents in spite of the damage done to their 4 children. When you have kids yourself then, and only then, do you really get to see how easy it is to get things wrong. We never get handbooks on how to live life. We have to learn through experience. I love Byron Katy's method. Really accelerates a lot of growth and compassion. Our weaknesses can truly become our strengths. For me I am the family scapegoat where siblings are not prepared to be honest, compassionate or selfreflective. I now rejoice in the fact that all perpetrators, collaborators and bystanders are gone from my life. Me bring part of a normal loving family was an illusion. I am the selfless caring one but also discarded by siblings who manipulated the 3rd sibling into supporting that "side". There are less people in what I could describe as my caring family. But those around me are very similar to me, ie honest and caring. This has left so much time and energy for new relationships, plus what I needed, which was to look after myself and my wants more. Being abandoned made me very very strong. And highly appreciative of kind people. I would be interested in reading any comments from anyone. I have already learned so much about people and myself through comment sections. I believe there are some very very special connections being developed. Hearing from people from every corner of the world is very exciting and interesting. I have looked at many belief systems. Am curious to know if there is anything in the idea about vibrations attracting similar vibrations. Its just amazing the connections I have made through all sorts of topics. ??? From New Zealand
@@prosimulateYour words resonate with me. Take care of yourself. Remember you have the right to pursue your own life dreams. You no longer have to protect your mother ans release the hate you've revealed to your father. Say goodbye to carryincg the burdon for your parents divorce. Beeathe and let it all go.
The fact that you think it "may sound cliche" still shows that you still care about what other people think... why does it seem cliche? Simply because you relate to the video? There's nothing cliche about relating with realness and if others think so then it only shows their own insecurities and how much of a lost cause they are.
Good talk, but how to create human connections, while we are more and more driven into connections through machines----- more and more computers, more and more video games ,more and more texting only, more and more RUclips, more and more TV shows----people/family sitting in front of machines/TVs. Will it not be better that instead of TVs, watching grand sport shows, people talk to each other, have friendly contacts with other human beings, pray together, express/show personal feelings/thoughts with each other. We are surrounded, and overwhelmed by machines. Children are more and more occupied with cell phones and video games.And there is no end in sight, more and machines are coming, day in and day out. Am I wrong about it, or I am right? I really do not know. Any one knows how to do it right??
so many lonely and sad people in the world. Life can be so great. Travel, martial arts training, reading, and approx 1,000 other activities/events. Man, so many are depressed. It IS systematic. I hope everyone finds peace and solace.
80% of the world can't do all the things you listed there , their god won't allow having some fun and experience new things ... only reading from 1 book and maybe a walk around the yard , for most of that 80% 2000+ years of brainwashing and lying to people hasn't helped any of them they need a good shake to wake up , instead of sleepwalking through their lives , like the dead zombie they follow
true, the more developed the country the more brainwashed and unhappy they are. i traveled around the world and honestly the poorest people have the most of life.. most educated people have no idea about values or how to be happy
Travel spreads the Western ideology so it's anathema to truly connecting with people. I heard of a guy giving a beggar a few coins in India which years ago were gratefully accepted but now are thrown back in disgust because the cruise ships bring in wealthier opportunities. As we travel and spread the wonder of other cultures we cultivate commerce into sending more people there. Our social media travel bloggers will eventually destroy the world as Westerners descend en masse onto unspoilt paradises turning them into refuse dumps of Western wants spilling garbage onto virgin lands once loved for being so beautiful and tranquil. For many people the great achievement of a day is feeding oneself and having shelter to sleep safely within or under. They don't need activities because life itself fills their days. We've lost that in the Western world of convenience shopping and free time which needs to be filled in order to be quality time. We've been told to fill our lives otherwise we're pointless. Why? Doing nothing is absolutely fine. It has no environmental impact. It is peace and solace. But few see that.
@@brynleytalbot778 travel bloggers are extremely dangerous. not only they destroy the planet, but they also don't have enough knowledge.. most young people rely on this low quality information which in many cases can even be dangerous.
Very powerful speaker, I’ve never heard monotone sound so passionate... Thank you, Dr. Maté. Edit: For all you savagely defending against this comment, first of all you should realize the word monotone is not an insult unless you make it one. Secondly it is actually a compliment based on the power of Dr. Maté’s message, despite his lack of enthusiasm. Thank you for the likes and other positive comments.
...and starve or live under the bridge. It has to be some sort of balance, I fully respect dr.Gabor, but we can't go from one extreme to another. We have built this civilization, yes, I know it's way from perfect, or good, but we can't do better now, it's clear... not that we don't want to, we just CAN'T, we carry cave people fears, instincts of gathering, etc... BUT we can try to find a middle road.
its called autonomy and is the number 1 undervalued trait in our society, its certainly the make or break for me when assessing other people for possible connection..... and thats why I don't have many connections
@@tanadamico8396 you are not your thoughts. Don't label with them. Observe them. Choose positive over negative. Sorry, I'm too busy to expand on it. But if I could recommend a book it might help. 'The Power of Now' - Eckhart Tolle
@@mariek.474 I've started by going back to church, going for walks at my local state park and giving people a chance. One thing could be look someone in the eyes and say hello at the store or ask how they're day is going? Don't be hard on your self, your good enough ✨
At 3:00 he's essentially talking about "attachment theory" but doesn't call it that. It's why we often ignore our gut feelings about a person in relationships, going toward someone we instinctively know is maybe not right for us, and ignoring that feeling because we are so desperate for love and affection and have an insecure anxious attachment we may not realize, or push away from someone we instinctively know in our gut is really good for us, because we have an insecure avoidant attachment we may not realize. If anyone on here does this, gets into relationships with the wrong people often, or really wants love and affection but often pushes it away, I implore you to search "attachment theory" here on RUclips and learn what type of insecure attachment you have, so that when you meet someone, you can take your insecure attachment into account, and force yourself away from people your gut says are wrong, or force yourself to do the scary thing and get close to people who you feel are right. We can't "change" our insecure attachments that were ingrained in us by the way our parents reacted to our needs as babies and children, but I think that we can overcome them to an extent with awareness and practice, in order to foster better intimate relationships.
You have just summed up what it is I need to be researching as I am now 35 years old and still cannot fathom why I always end up giving too much to the wrong guys in a relationship and why I push away the good guys. It's driving me insane and I want to find out more. I have been feeling so alienated from the world these last few years to the point of questioning if this life is worth living. Of course it is... but I need to find out how to make it worth living which is the hard part...
Ok but he is not speaking just about relationships! It would seem that his words triggered your own relationship issues. I did not construe this as a relationship discussion.
Dr. Mate has stopped me on several occasions from self harm and OVER SPENDING - I can't see auras but I feel through this box of wire, metal, plastic, glass, his WIFI. Deep in an anemic slug depression, my 5 senses aren't operating much, but this man's genuinely, wisdom, kindly handsome face, ARE HERE. Namaste Dr. Mate
“No infant is born without gut feeling”.....it is so enlightening...(reminds me also how we impose -many times needless -shame on children as they grow up), I wish my parents had known that when they opted on circumcising me decades ago.
The paradox of our time in history is that we have taller buildings but shorter tempers, wider freeways, but narrower viewpoints. We spend more, but have less, we buy more, but enjoy less. We have bigger houses and smaller families, more conveniences, but less time. We have more degrees but less sense, more knowledge, but less judgment, more experts, yet more problems, more medicine, but less wellness. We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laugh too little, drive too fast, get too angry, stay up too late, get up too tired, read too little, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom. We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values. We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often. We've learned how to make a living, but not a life. We've added years to life not life to years. We've been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the street to meet a new neighbor. We conquered outer space but not inner space. We've done larger things, but not better things. We've cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul. We've conquered the atom, but not our prejudice. We write more, but learn less. We plan more, but accomplish less. We've learned to rush, but not to wait. We build more computers to hold more information, to produce more copies than ever, but we communicate less and less. These are the times of fast foods and slow digestion, big men and small character, steep profits and shallow relationships. These are the days of two incomes but more divorce, fancier houses, but broken homes. These are days of quick trips, disposable diapers, throwaway morality, one night stands, overweight bodies, and pills that do everything from cheer, to quiet, to kill. It is a time when there is much in the showroom window and nothing in the stockroom. A time when technology can bring this letter to you, and a time when you can choose either to share this insight, or to just hit delete. Remember, spend some time with your loved ones, because they are not going to be around forever. Remember, say a kind word to someone who looks up to you in awe, because that little person soon will grow up and leave your side. Remember, to give a warm hug to the one next to you, because that is the only treasure you can give with your heart and it doesn't cost a cent. Remember, to say, I love you to your partner and your loved ones, but most of all mean it. A kiss and an embrace will mend hurt when it comes from deep inside of you. Remember to hold hands and cherish the moment for someday that person will not be there again. Give time to love, give time to speak, and give time to share the precious thoughts in your mind. Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away. Bob Moorehead
Dr Gabor Mate is probably one of the greatest human beings alive on the planet right now. This video is a very incomplete slice of his thought provoking talks. I would recommend searching for more of Gabor Mate on here. He has a fountain of wisdom and knowledge to share with those who wish to understand themselves better, and the world we live in better, at a more profound level. Know Thy Self.
how culture makes us feel lost: Disconnection. solution: Connect [0:22] connect with nature [0:40] connect with others [1:01] connect with creativity (in what you do/or how you do it) [2:05] connect with yourself (spend some time alone [exercise, meditate, or read] to clear your mind)
What we put in our body is also a huge problem. #1 is water. City water systems are bad and plastic bottled water isn't an option because it's highly poisonous with BPA and other estrogen active chemicals. Also fluoride from the water calcifies pineal gland. Research that. #2 is food. I live in rural area in eastern Europe where our grandmas and grandpas grew up on 100% organic food and most of them are in their 90's without major health problems. Now, many of their children and newer generations eat only meat. Not homemade organic meat, but highly processed meat from supermarket. Alot of them became aggresive, sick, stupid and sad. Some of them died suddenly in their 50's. People in the villages and small cities don't have damn gardens anymore. It's stupid. #3 is plastic. As I said before, plastic is full of estrogen active chemicals. They disrupt our endocrine system (makes us fat, depressed, angry etc.) and those faults are even passed on genetically. No wonder we have so many fat people, 10 year old girls with menstruation and so many gays. Yeah, some people would be gay anyway, but most of them are simply victims of chemicals which fucked up their endocrine system! Alot of them have bipolar disorder and that is simply the proof of my statement. They aren't real gays, they are confused and depressed because of the poison they put inside their bodies. So yeah, you can try to connect with everything that is said in this video, but it will not work if you poison the basis of this Earthly existance which is your own body.
@@swtoni4464 being gay isnt related to having more estrogen in your body. You can research on that. Men who mistakenly tried to "balance off" their endocrine system with some other hormones resulted in having more testosteron which was not healthy, which means that they had enough of those hormones.
My greatest connections to life are family, lucid dreaming, and music. An occasional out-of-body experience is refreshing to the spirit, as well. Without these things I would be absolutely lost in darkness.
Nike has been doing an outstanding work on creating new technology to running and most sport shoes and clothing and it has helped thousands of people to do better in their sports. Of course we need love to live, and trying to use products and brands to fulfill this kind of gap is illusion. But don't blame products for that. Products of the capitalism are what helped us to grow civilized as a society, and have a good level of comfort and health. Think about hospital technologies, medicine. Now we can afford living till 90 if we are lucky. Be grateful to products and capitalism, but use it moderately.
@ippos_khloros *example bo jackson steps up to bat. Gut feeling is that shits about to pop off. Now in the hell loop gulch in recent sacred crisis example, gut feeling is a juckstuppose compared to dormant years as younger lovers in the not so younger sun lol seriously plausible. Talking exercises the esophagus.
As one must know sadness to truly appreciate happiness, one must also experience the sense of a seemingly meaningless existence in order to fully appreciate one's true purpose.
I was depressed for a long long time and after years of feeling hopeless and meaningless something suddenly changed in me, now I feel better than ever and I appreciate life so much more. Even if there are things going wrong in my life I still see the bright side of things. Life is really worth living :)
Rodrigue Grange No your response shows you haven't had experience of what he said there. To reiterate...when you have experienced real sadness then you can appreciate happiness. When you do (and you will because it is inevitable...no one escapes real sadness) you'll see. Sounds to me like you have a good life but believe me, when you hit rock bottom....perhaps even to the point of suicidal thoughts... and emerge from it, you'll remember this.
I remember one day thinking “so what if i die and one day go to heaven and feel happy, happiness is just an emotion and there is no meaning in anything” and when I thought about that I realized how suicidal I sounded. Is that what you mean by sense of a seemingly meaningless existence?
Thank You Gabor.. your gentle wisdom and presence is changing this insanity we face.. and you are making a beautiful difference.. reminding us of who we truly are and holding the greedy ones who profit off the sad and lonely via addiction that they have pushed and pushed in our faces. Thank You. Wanting to feel better is not a crime.
I definitely feel a sense of disconnection from everything. I’ve focused on nothing but how I look, and fitness and how others perceive me, cars etc, I feel happy but it’s a happiness based on peace of mind on being afloat, not real happiness.
@@mikeearls126 The only reason you might think it's insane is because your mind/ego will feel threatened by it and create all sorts of wonderful diversions and escapes for you. It is also not a concept, see above for the explanation as to why it is not a concept 😊 keep going Mike 👍
@@alexis-rl2vo if you can read your own internal book it would be better than any other book on offer. Part of the problem is we are always looking for external solutions religions, gurus etc to follow and then this too becomes part of the problem. If you can see that absolutely clearly, then you are already reading a good book as it were. If you can't do that, no problem, I will try to point you in a direction. Let me know how you get on🙏
I think the first step is to be willing to engage in meaningful, reciprocal dialogue with people who disagree with you. In other words, the exact opposite of what everybody does now. :)
I can watch this on repeat. It's simply hits me in the heart every single time. We need a shift on a fundamental societal level. Fight for "You". Cuz ain't nobody else gonna.
I feel a bit lost in work being surrounded by people who enjoy the shallow Kim Kardashian culture. When I'm out in the mountains or playing live music with friends my soul gets replenished.
~~ The Stream ~~ Social anxiety; is that me? I find comfort in classrooms, it’s a place I can breathe. when I get back home and roomies’ got ten friends over I retreat to my room like a traumatized soldier It’s not that I don’t like people, ‘cuz I do I just can’t relate to your everyday Sue my tolerance low for meaningless drivel hear folks unconscious, complain and snivel about their f***** up reality or that new show on MTV or the face on Esquire they’re all tryin’ to be everyone’s concerned with who fucked who I’m more concerned why the sky is blue where does body meet soul? can the mind find perfection? is our whole essence captured in the mirrors reflection? is there more to humans than meets the eye? or are we just bags of flesh trying to survive till we die? is there a higher realm? is God’s eye the sun? will Earth become Heaven when we unite as one? can we create world harmony? or is harmony just in music? is faith just a choice there if you choose it? or does it come from within? does it come from above? or is it something you catch like a ball in a glove? Is to love and be loved what holds the most worth? are things that most matter present from birth? blessed we are to merely exist It can end any second with a flick of God’s wrist so while some are consumed by grades, jobs, and women I’ll be drinking the spirit of higher livin’ and in the end I may not have a big house or Mercedes or be followed by swarms of short-skirted ladies but I’ll have the earth and I’ll have my heart things that we all have right from the start so while folks are mining, searching for gold I’ll be living the life of the divine, of the bold In this world of wonder I’ll dare to dream because only dead fish flow with the stream
This was the BEST I have seen yet about why we feel so bad inside ! For various reasons I was seperated from all four of those things & my family & I am living in a lonely Hell ! Would like to hear more from this man !
not that insightful. which is a good thing! we were all born with instincts and all of our natural qualities that make us human, so we all feel this deep down but have lost touch in this cultivated word. i cant help but feel sad for u that u think this is an amazing insight, you know?
I blame Television! Once Television came to the picture everyone now wants to idolize celebrities that don't give a rats ass about them and try to be like Kim Kardashian or follow popular trends
Problem is also more and more isolation. More singles, not playing outside anymore but play videogames, no talking but Whatsapp, no small talk in public areas/ transport, its headphones in and eyes on the phone.. and the list goes on And in just like, about 25 years or something the change is HUGE, the human cant adjust in just 25 years to this.. we are talking about 10000s years of evolution. We are supposed to bond and live in groups and thats not happening now.
Dr Maté, I'm so happy that I found you. I've shared your videos with everyone I know. They have had a huge positive impact on me, inspiring me and giving me hope. Thank you and God bless you and your family.
This is the thing I have been battling with for so many years. Specifically coming to London gave me a sensation of isolation I had never experienced before. Even when I am in the relationship I always wanted. I try to Re-member or Re-unite with my True Self by going out in nature, become more aware about myself, create and must Be. Because we are human beings not human doings. Completing this comment while ads continue to play about getting rich on Instagram...
Whoever is reading this now, remember: You are the light! You are unique and worth it! You are blessed to be in your body and experience all that is! Blessings to all beings! Love and Light!
@@arnieb3947 take a minute in a quiet place, close your eyes and breathe. Just breathe and feel that you are alive, every single cell is breathing. By accepting and acknowledging the fact that you exist, recognize how powerful you and your energy are! Ask yourself what holds you back to believe it and you will get the answers! :) Blessings!✨❤️
Gabor Maté is spot on! This subject is very rarely discussed in out culture because we want to defend the cause of it and its existence like a collective ego, yet Gabor Maté tells of this perfectly. When one feels incompatible with the culture that he/she/they were born into, that’s alienation. I feel that now, because my culture ‘dictates’ that I _must_ be a ‘gentleman’ and my culture ‘judges’ me as to how I am that cultural egoic icon, but I desire to be ‘me’ whatever that is, ‘gentleman’ or no ‘gentleman’. Culture does not understand the true self of the individual, nor wants to, because of its defence for its existence.
Lovely, and practical. Some time ago, I decided to remove my heart and replace it with an orange flame of self-compassion, which I, and only I are wholly responsible for . Some days it shines brighter than others, but it’s changing my view of love. Love is no longer ‘the one’, or a thing. Love is community.
us/them is everywhere. "Our football team is better than theirs", "Our country is better than theirs" , Even gangs control different zip codes and are at war with each other. It's who we are.
It’s a different kind of wiring though. Empathy, love, and compassion can definitely win over an “us and them” mentality in people. Us and them is mostly an illusion but love is generally seen as one of the realist things about being human. It’s in our nature to understand reality by grouping and differentiating but higher levels of science indicate that we are all really made of the same stuff. We get caught up differentiating abstract ideas that don’t always have a basis in reality and that separates us.
@@VentureHolly whatever the message was it is true that us versus them mentality is deeply ingrained in us and should be recognised for what it is. All you have to do is look at sport teams such as football and see their fan base. It tells you everything you need to know about this. These feelings are very powerful.
Dr mate is a realist and genius i must listen to him everyday..his voice is reasuring and his thinking is mind alternating that is so badly needed in our lives today..he puts you on a differnt plain with a deeper sence of living a full intence life style and yet still have a relaxed life all at the sametime......he is amazing
I absolutely love these videos...Your voice makes me float back into the chair and brings my whole body into a calm place and then opens my mind and let’s you in...Anyone else?
The fact that we are looking to comfort ourselves watching this type of videos and that there are so many people that feel lost and depressed is very sad. Mental illness is very common and yet ignored or ridiculed by many. Our "leaders" need to pay real attention to this issue. The world needs love, empathy and guidance. Have a nice day, I'm trying to... but I can't.
Mariaice133 Yes ... That’s exactly what I mean .. :-) When you live a life without expecting anything from anyone , you can’t be disappointed .. The feeling of disappointment will then start a chain reaction that’s gonna elevate other negative emotions in your psyche and eventually lead you to a place where you not only feel used , let-down , frustrated , negative , confused and disappointed, but also you will start bringing judgment into these emotions that will eventually spiral out of control and effect your state of mind in a negative way ... Instead , if you could give without expecting anything in return , then the feeing of disappointment can’t survive in that form and your state of mind will not be negatively effected ..
Mariaice133 You start living with ZERO expectations by becoming a stronger person , by increasing your self -esteem... Start by spending more time with yourself , I am not talking about driving alone or sitting on the sofa and listening to music ... I am talking about taking yourself on dates , doing a weekend escape , going to a place away from where you live and spending the weekend all by yourself , learning and becoming comfortable living with yourself peacefully and happily ... without having to depend on anyone else to make you feel a certain way ... Once you start doing this , then you will eventually realize it’s really not that girlfriend that’s making you feel disappointed , or your mother making you feel upset because she is being selfish , or your friend letting you down , but it’s your OWN mind ... Once you get a hold of your mind , embrace it , cultivate it , and observe it , then you will have ZERO expectations as your dependency on others and external events diminishes ... 😉😉😉
Mustafa Baris you are very wise! I live with a lot of expectations. My gf broke up with me, did some stuff that she shouldn’t have done that’s embarrassed me, trying to sleep with people I know and I’m so lost. I need to find myself and learn to live with out feeling lonely and depressed. Any kind words would be of help
I work as a software developer and am currently sick with shingles. I put it down to the stress of working in an industry where being a jerk is seen as being a value worth following. On many occasions my team lead has praised himself for being nasty or cruel.
You might want to consider another line of work. You sound like you may be too humane to be in that environment. You're at odds with yourself. You need the job but the paradigm you work within is not in keeping with your values. Shingles is serious. I know it's easy for someone to just say "get out" . Bills have to be paid. At least set your sights on leaving while you work there. Look -you have ONE life. YOU decide how you want to live it. Never mind what you're corporate buddies have to say. I 've spoken to many people who worked in the corporate world and then figured out that it took too high a toll on their well being.
@@bellavia5 I have had shingles 3 times in my life and it's no picnic. All 3 times in the same location. Now I have what is called shingles neuropathy, where the same nerve root has been infected so many times that it becomes damaged, causing a chronic localized pain similar to fibromyalgia, but only in 1 spot. Each time it was stress related, & sounds the same in Slartibartfast's situation. I was a Registered Nurse for 35 years. In what you would think is the most humane profession in the world, it has become infected with the corporate mentality in very short order. 1st came the patient is our customer, which was quickly followed with the patient & the family are both our customers. Once that realization dawned on the patients & the families, came the familiar idiom that, "the customer's always right." So when the patient picks & chooses which medications they're gonna take, orders out & eats an entire pizza every night, and can't be found for breathing treatments or vital signs because they're downstairs smoking every 15-20 minutes, we're supposed to grin & bear it. Or when the family wants the other bed in a double room to be kept empty so that 8-12 family members can create a makeshift shelter in place & stage a 'round-the-clock sleepover in the patient's room, we're supposed to grin & bear it, provide everyone with pillows & linens, try not to step on anyone, or wake anyone up while doing rounds & care. Oh, and fill their cooler with ice or their thermos with coffee. Regardless of the request, from the serious to the ridiculous, we had a policy that mandated we say, "Why of course, I've got all the time in the world." Which to me, was the professional equivalent of saying, "You want fries with that?" We had to take mandatory annual training in customer relations that would put the Gap to shame. Now, Medicare & Medicaid have jumped on-board. Patients AND families can leave and are encouraged to leave comments about the hospital stay on their website and rate the hospital. You can imagine what these look like, based on how wonderful all these YT comment sections are and how Amazon's product ratings turn out. Except that 20% of a hospital's reimbursement is now based off these comments & ratings. I have one question for you, and I already know the answer: Would you rather be treated by a healthcare system that places value in the quest for advancements in care & good patient outcomes (you lived/survived) or a healthcare market driven by and geared towards consumer perception (outcomes don't matter, only obtaining and maintaining that golden 5-star status)? I used to love being a nurse. I got great professional as well as personal satisfaction from my career, except for the last 8-10 years. I'm glad my career came to an end when it did. I was an old school dinosaur who saw my time flourish and then come to its end. I would advise our friend here to use his current job and talents to keep the lights on, all while fishing for other opportunities, making good connections with business clients, and networking. You'd be surprised at how many opportunities you can get 1st notice on when you start to use your job & position as a stepping stone, rather than being stepped on your entire corporate career. Or being a software developer, create an app on your own time. There's an open field there. Create a few, move to an area you can love with a lower cost of living, and learn to live off the residual. Life's too short to be miserable. I saw a study once that proved work you don't enjoy is perceived as 85% harder than it actually is. That's quite a burden to bear, along with being miserable. And as one person said, "If you find a job you love, you'll never work a day in your life."
This message is to everyone reading this have faith do not live in fear we all have a purpose to serve this world to make it a better place Share this video with everyone no matter what much love God bless everyone
We are brainwashed and programmed to think, speak, dream and worship empty brain numbing soul sucking numbers. Leaving us feeling empty and lonely. Because loveless lifeless numbers are completely absent of light, warmth, love, joy, magic, meaning, beauty and wisdom.
steve coley Yes, people are becoming enslaved and they are none the wiser to this insidious dis-ease. Completely unaware of giving their precious energy away.
Christy Fox this have existed since the first human intelligent civilization but just like us the system evolved and the “things” that control us and keep us deeply asleep have more tools now to keep us intact bowing to there will I am tired some days I choose to live by my own rules and what I want not what the system want me to be or do this is frustrating but sadly it was always there long ago your and my birth it have always been there we are just starting to see it now
Who the hell on earth (369 dislikes at this moment 05/22/19) would dislike these beautiful words from this beautiful man??? They must be alienated from themselves.
David Spencer- Máte said so much without saying anything at all. Left with questions...how does one lose one self and what is true nature. Empathy - too much left unsaid. Sounds like truth layered bullshit. I grew up being told listen to your gut instinct. I reserve the right to thumbs up or down. Yay internet! 👍
@@EileenMRyan well, it could seem like that if this is the only thing you've heard from him. I have heard him go very in-depth into the hows and whys in many other videos.
David Spencer the truly unaware and unawakened will downvote this message. There are many, way too many that want society in complete chaos and need to see the degradation and collapse of society. I’m sure they stand to benefit in some way financially from a lost and disconnected society! To many here the ONLY journey is creating chaos.
Gut feelings are instincts. Not something you learn from experience, rather something you are born with. Many animals have them, pretty much necessary for survival.
This man's awesome. I'm sure he's seen a lot and I'm glad to listen to his words, so comforting. Thanks Dr. And I'll add that you shouldn't search the meaning of life or God, cause you'll end completely MAD. The meaning of this life is just one:"Live It". The trick is to live it the best you can and overcome all the Fuc**ng problems you're in during it. Live it till the end and accept all its consequences with love, cause you'll see that you know not other thing but living life as it is. Search YOUR truth, cause YOU have all the answers to all your questions. Notice that God is in yourself and when you talk to others you're doing nothing but talking to yourself. Practice silence and meditation, such as yoga or some kind of subject that nurtures your inner-being and do nothing but LIVE, LOVE and DON'T THINK TOO MUTCH. Give a time to every single thing you want to do in this live, cause there's no time enough. Love 🙌❤✌😉
I drowned when I was 13 years old in 20 foot surf on the Gold Coast. I drowned and had an NDE. I won’t go through the whole experience but the reason why I’m saying... or should I say leaving a comment here is...about the gut feeling this man is speaking of. Where ever I was when I died the energy (god for lack of a better human word) that was speaking to me and through me and of me and about me said the exact same thing, you will hear me speak to you when you get that Uneasiness in your stomach. Remember my child this is me giving you direction. Never ignore my advice.
@@miranx5735 - Thanks for your reply. It’s very very hard to describe something that is not of this world. I use the word energy meaning I felt for lack of a better word, electricity and walked around me and go through me. I never felt a human presents meaning Jesus or Mohammed etc. It was more of a universal light.
I love how the mountain bike trail ride made this video! I live where I can’t ride...and I am sad. I guess i should trust my gut and get back to the mountains
and it's so hard to become aware of that! few are those who see this world in the seed, rather than blindly accept it for what it is. It's really really difficult to gain that perspective. seems like suffering is one of the ways to get there, for better or for worse.
I really just have alienation from nature. Growing up in La it’s weird to be in a place where nothing is older than 100-200 years and it makes you feel disconnected from history
This is why I hate LA. All they care about is money and clout. That's why porn stars and reality shows and actors and rappers and all people who don't care about the meaning of life live there.
I love LA. Great beaches, hikes, angel's crest is an amazing drive when i want to take a break. Go up north and hit santa barbara if you feel like it. EVERYTHING is made out of nature. It's everywhere if you know How to look at it.
It's so nice to read the comments and see/realise there are many others searching for the same thing (or why else would you be here? 🙂) but so sad that you rarely meet people in person to share these feelings with.
Gordymax - People over 50 matter too. We were raised in this society as well. Everyone, at every age, should hear this information (or at least to be reminded of Dr. Mate's points). With a little luck and good self-care you'll be over 50 someday too :D
@@drunkvegangal8089 i think what he was trying to say that is sad that young people are not interested in the subject but are out and about chasing emptiness.
Am I the only one who finds comfort in reading these comments? A sense of having an invisible tribe out there that understands you?
Absolutely. Tomorrow I have a biopsy on my thyroid. I don’t feel so alone now.
@@corvettedm1 best of luck... Hope all goes well... Praying for your quick recovery
I always look at comments
Not alone.
I think you would feel so surrounded by joining Irene Lyon‘s Facebook group 😊 she teaches and refers to Gabor‘s work
hugs to whoever lonely and sad
and to you, friend.
Nice of you and very kind.
Thanks needed a hug today
😔✌🏼
You lied, still got no hugs nor feel any hugs
"The cost of sanity in this society, is a certain level of alienation" Terence Mckenna
Those who wish to be
Must put aside the alienation
Get on with the fascination
The real relation
The underlying theme
- Neil Peart, Limelight by RUSH.
I agree. I've heard Terence talk on a RUclips documentary.
ruclips.net/video/SdZIiBLtWf4/видео.html
I wish he could convince the young people, the military, the police and all kind of authorities. Especially people in power.
@@dadigitechman I hope you´re right.
"Do you remember who you were before society told you who you should be"
I enjoyed delights in the little things and the giggles before society told me those things were not ambitious
Myself and happy
I just was
@@lucyxu2618 felt this so much
Is there really a concept of me before environment reflects me? My personality is the interface between my being and the other. So of course I can't remember such a thing before society told me what it is and how should it be, even the idea of me come to being because of the language and behaviours that I acquired from society. Eveything is connected and interdependent. But my reaction to that imposition is not passive acceptance either.
I walk early every morning with my dogs, I now say good morning and hello to the trees, bushes, birds, plants and various others forms of life, for without them you and I wouldn’t be here, take the time if even for a short moment just to look and see what we would normally take for granted and appreciate life as nature should be appreciated, it is a gift from the universe and should be respected.
Yeah, I do the same, and I also admire how ridiculous beautiful the flowers and the landscaping in my neighborhood looks.
Indeed, nature should be appreciated, because it’s a gift from God as well as ourselves.
@Metanoia Many believe God and the universe are the same thing. Its just language. If this video resonates with you and you see it talking about a disconnection largely from God and someone else thinks a disconnection from the universe, you are in agreement as far as I'm concerned. Try not to get hung up on terminology and like he says: "trust your gut".
@Metanoia god fuck off, theres always one debbie downer who has to be technical in every situation. Please dont breed
@@JackCooksonMusic Kiaora.That is awesome how you picked up on those areas of disconnection, and how an argument can start immediately, just based on some difference in how 2 people have come to see the explanations for the wonders of our world or just the terms people use. Awesome food for thought.
Kiaora again from New Zealand.
I met this guy, during a really rough year of my life. I’m glad I’m in a better mind frame now. Glad to have met you.
He must’ve been send from god.
Catlinbn
I am jealous. Glad you had the opportunity.
Get back to our true Nature..
In the eyes of truth
1. Alienated from nature
2. Alienated from people
3. Alienated from creativity
4. Alienated from self/gut feeling
> products are sold to fill the gaps, but fail
1. Nature is a bitch who should be placed firmly under the heel of mankind
2. Only the intelligent feel alienated from other people, the rest are fools and get along just fine
3. True creativity is illegal, legal creativity is immoral
4. Refer to number 3.
And you're right about the products. But it is nice to by things every now and again.
Christ everyone is so fucking cynical. Products are great! Ever look at a tin of Campbell's soup?
@@inquisitorkrieger8171 Oh wow. Edgy kids everywhere.
@@inquisitorkrieger8171 feeling better now, big man?
@@inquisitorkrieger8171 on your no. 1 mate don't forget if we screw with nature and we are - big time it deals with us firmly in its own way remember the dinosaurs? You make it sound like nature's some beast that needs to be tamed like a lion - put it in a cage. Err.......
"We're actually wired for empathy - even rats are wired for empathy. When you stress out rats in a laboratory by shocking their feet with electricity, they're more stressed watching other rats being shocked than when they're shocked themselves. Contrary to the myth in our culture that we're separated, aggressive, competitive creatures, we're actually wired for empathy, for connection, for love, for compassion. So really, to move forward, all we have to do is to get back to our true nature."
So true. Recently I thought something about my collegue at work that made me feel bad for her but it turns out I didnt know all the facts and she is doig better than I thought and made me so happy. We truly do want to see people happy.
Poor rats... so cruel
For me, sometimes the feelings of others is almost more powerful than my own feelings.
Seems kinda hard when the whole world is moving in an opposite direction. As if you had to change the world
@@kakasenfman True that but we can do something in our power.Atleast we should start from our family,friends, colleagues, acquaintances.From this group atleast a few will understand your empathy and try to implement the same and a ripple will form.After all it took centuries for us to lose our empathy and come to this hopeless condition,so if we start slowly atleast our future generations will get to see the real humanity.
I have always believed that economy is based on alienating people .When people are together they need too few things to feel good and enjoy themselves .When they are apart they are unhappy and empty so they buy things to feel better .We dont need things ,we are not consumers ,we are Human beings ,we just need each other.
I love your comment! "We just need each other" really warmed my heart up 💚
So true
So throw away your computer and phone lol
Divide et impera
So so true
man this video hits different when youre watching it in a cubicle with deadlines looming above your head.
lol!
movie Office Space is your bible.
Yep, I used to live that life 2 years ago. I know it well.
I replied thumbs down to (I thought) the comment that follows yours about so many people over 50 being in the audience - very sorry. I had already given you a thumbs up. I am in my 70's, work from home for a wonderful humanitarian organization., but the work is so overwhelming and I'm so far behind after a bad accident it freaks me daily. So I'm somewhere close to being on the same page as you. Great comment, Mahesa!
Hope you're okay, try and make time to go on walks in nature if there's any nearby you, remember the present moment is more valuable than future or past ❤️
‘The world couldn’t stand who you were.” That one hit a nerve with me.
“Alienation from yourself” was a point that hurt just when he said it
Yes it's so hard though. You have the gut feeling but the mind logic thinks about all the fears of bad what ifs.
The moment when you realize you are lost af in every sense...Great!
At least you've realised
Atoms in the universe only bond when both "think" that the new bond is advantagious for them. They only share an electron when it gets them closer to "Equilibrium". Its the same with human connection. Always there has to be something in the middle of a connection, a thing that both partys want. So think about what you are willing to provide to people and go and search for people that need it. Good luck ;-)
You are lucky! Most don't ever get to know
darude sandstorm
I can recognize The Truth when I read it. I make it where I’m given a “secret” and today I found it here.
How can I find out more bc it makes perfect sense.
Everything is down hill with God. Nothing I want is uphill
The moment you realize the video is meant to make you feel that way!
We are so close yet so far from each other. Soul crushingly.
Yet I bet if I approached you in the street you'd freak out. Relationships take time. We have to be around people. Get to know them. And then maintain healthy relationships with people. Relationships go bad if not worked on.
Your literary talents go between the 5-55 age gap.
we had to go to this place to get to where we are going, it's okay :)
Rusty Shackleford >>> Humans should love each other not cheat on each other.
@@daithiocinnsealach1982 Yep, right.
School is where we learn to ignore our gut feelings and sometimes listen to teachers who don't give a damn about us and get us in trouble when we go with our gut because they've lost the ability to do so.
Teachers are failures in real life, they work for shit money filling kids with mostly useless and unnecessary knowledge.
Its basically indoctrination from the young age so you can become a good corporate slave, follower.
@@guitar-jo Agreed. The school system though is fundamentally corrupt even if there are a few genuine really good teachers here and there the system doesn't promote that kind of behavior.
I only had good teachers and my dad also taught me a lot.
Most teachers do care. They are operating under a system that does not allow them the freedom they need to be effective. They use their own money to purchase school supplies. They notify help when a child is being abused. You have a lot of anger in your heart.
So does that mean students should be able to stand up and walk around whenever they want to even while the teacher is talking?
At 46 yr old you described the last 40 years of my life. I am a man out of time, a stranger in a strange land. EVERYTHING I was taught to care about and make me happy, a career, a home, a family, I have never had any interest in, especially working a job. I feel that I was meant to live a solitary life and unfortunately have been immersed in a society I care nothing about.
I hope you have found some kind of path ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤ im rooting for you :)
I read you Tyson. I’m 49yr old, I was much happier younger but the older I get the more distorted the world seems to appear. I had a few friends but you keep sensing one-up-man-ship going on and it’s toxic. I’m an engineer, and found that by studying new methods I give my self a sense of purpose and improved mental self esteem. I care less about what people think of me, societal expectaions are impossible to meet these days. I’ve never had a dog or a cat but I sure as hell would consider it in the future plus maybe learning to play a guitar properly. I feel for you, I take care of my Mom who has separated from my Dad 20 years ago. They were so unhappy together. I saw Back to the Future again over Christmas 2020, and thought if I could do one thing, I’d stop my Mom marrying my Dad. I told that to my Dad today. He wasn’t happy, but he could see that time had eroded my natural smile.
@@prosimulate
Tena koe.
I was just trying to find some friends I made here a few months ago.
But I got side tracked and read some interesting comments, including yours.
It is good to re evaluate our lives, especially at our age when it is probably half over.
Your "new methods" sound interesting.
I also don't care nearly as much what others think of me. It is so very liberating.
As for one-up-man-ship. I thought that was a man thing. But I expect that with confidence, age, maturity, wisdom and humility, I think it declines.
Women seem to have a different way of operating, which involves connecting more, but they can alienate other women as well.
I wanted to mention some ideas that might help move the corners of your mouth up again.
Firstly, thankyou for your compassion for your mother.
In my mind, and heart, compassion goes hand in hand with connection. I mention that because of the beautiful and insightful lecture we have seen from Gabor Mate.
All of my life I have been very affected by the suffering of others.
I myself have had a lot of suffering in my life. I guess that is why I was an empath right from the start of it all.
Within the last few years, I was again hit with some stuff I would never have expected or believed could happen.
It was possibly the worst of all the biggest challenges of my life.
But, everso wonderfully, I learned a lot. A real, real lot.
I searched for answers and I found them. I would be writing all night if I were to list or describe them.
The insights, personal growth and spiritual ascension has actually made the years of my hell, all worthwhile. I lost so much, but at the end of the day, it actually, what I gained was more precious than all that I lost.
I like to think that your Mum has had many good times, and that she learned a lot, and is at eace with the chices she made.
I stayed in 3 unsatisfactory relationships. The last one lasted 17 years and I cared for him at home when he was dying.
But not long after, I met a really lovely man. I often wonder if I was somehow prepared for better things.
All we have is today, and hopefully tomorrow and beyond.
Yesterday is gone, but we can cultivate joy right now.
I was listening to a song again yesterday 'Just an illusion', by Julie Zahra.
Some things I dedicated a lot of my life to were an ilusion.
I will finish my speel when I have time.
@@prosimulate
Hello again.
I just wish you well on your journey.
Expectations from society are not aligned with what is good for ourselves, others or the planet.
There is so much disconnection.
But we do not have to conform to the shallow areas of expectations, as you know.
Victor Frankl understood that suffering is fine if there is meaning in it.
Buddhists are good at thinking positively about suffering.
By the time your mother separated from your father she would have been very clear on what she did not want in her life.
She would have, I think, marvelled at her newfound freedom. She will have directed her own life and learned her own lessons, as we all do, without complications from your father.
I am extremely lucky that I choose to forgive others.
I have nothing but appreciation for both parents in spite of the damage done to their 4 children.
When you have kids yourself then, and only then, do you really get to see how easy it is to
get things wrong.
We never get handbooks on how to live life. We have to learn through experience.
I love Byron Katy's method. Really accelerates a lot of growth and compassion.
Our weaknesses can truly become our strengths.
For me I am the family scapegoat where siblings are not prepared to be honest, compassionate
or selfreflective.
I now rejoice in the fact that all perpetrators, collaborators and bystanders are gone from my life.
Me bring part of a normal loving family was an illusion.
I am the selfless caring one but also discarded by siblings who manipulated the 3rd sibling into supporting that "side".
There are less people in what I could describe as my caring family. But those around me are very similar to me, ie honest and caring.
This has left so much time and energy for new relationships, plus what I needed, which was to look after myself and my wants more.
Being abandoned made me very very strong. And highly appreciative of kind people.
I would be interested in reading any comments from anyone.
I have already learned so much about people and myself through comment sections.
I believe there are some very very special connections being developed.
Hearing from people from every corner of the world is very exciting and interesting.
I have looked at many belief systems. Am curious to know if there is anything in the idea about vibrations attracting similar vibrations.
Its just amazing the connections I have made through all sorts of topics. ???
From New Zealand
@@prosimulateYour words resonate with me. Take care of yourself. Remember you have the right to pursue your own life dreams. You no longer have to protect your mother ans release the hate you've revealed to your father. Say goodbye to carryincg the burdon for your parents divorce. Beeathe and let it all go.
This may sound cliche, but this speaks to me, and this is exactly what I needed to hear right now.
Hope your doing well.
Im with you bro
I too needed this right now. Glad I found something like this.
The fact that you think it "may sound cliche" still shows that you still care about what other people think... why does it seem cliche? Simply because you relate to the video? There's nothing cliche about relating with realness and if others think so then it only shows their own insecurities and how much of a lost cause they are.
Good talk, but how to create human connections, while we are more and more driven into connections through machines----- more and more computers, more and more video games ,more and more texting only, more and more RUclips, more and more TV shows----people/family sitting in front of machines/TVs. Will it not be better that instead of TVs, watching grand sport shows, people talk to each other, have friendly contacts with other human beings, pray together, express/show personal feelings/thoughts with each other. We are surrounded, and overwhelmed by machines. Children are more and more occupied with cell phones and video games.And there is no end in sight, more and machines are coming, day in and day out. Am I wrong about it, or I am right? I really do not know. Any one knows how to do it right??
so many lonely and sad people in the world. Life can be so great. Travel, martial arts training, reading, and approx 1,000 other activities/events. Man, so many are depressed. It IS systematic. I hope everyone finds peace and solace.
80% of the world can't do all the things you listed there , their god won't allow having some fun and experience new things ...
only reading from 1 book and maybe a walk around the yard , for most of that 80%
2000+ years of brainwashing and lying to people hasn't helped any of them
they need a good shake to wake up , instead of sleepwalking through their lives , like the dead zombie they follow
true, the more developed the country the more brainwashed and unhappy they are. i traveled around the world and honestly the poorest people have the most of life.. most educated people have no idea about values or how to be happy
Activities, travel..... helps but eventually , at some point, I feel a dire need for a meaningful lasting connection with someone.
Travel spreads the Western ideology so it's anathema to truly connecting with people. I heard of a guy giving a beggar a few coins in India which years ago were gratefully accepted but now are thrown back in disgust because the cruise ships bring in wealthier opportunities. As we travel and spread the wonder of other cultures we cultivate commerce into sending more people there. Our social media travel bloggers will eventually destroy the world as Westerners descend en masse onto unspoilt paradises turning them into refuse dumps of Western wants spilling garbage onto virgin lands once loved for being so beautiful and tranquil.
For many people the great achievement of a day is feeding oneself and having shelter to sleep safely within or under. They don't need activities because life itself fills their days. We've lost that in the Western world of convenience shopping and free time which needs to be filled in order to be quality time. We've been told to fill our lives otherwise we're pointless. Why? Doing nothing is absolutely fine. It has no environmental impact. It is peace and solace. But few see that.
@@brynleytalbot778 travel bloggers are extremely dangerous. not only they destroy the planet, but they also don't have enough knowledge.. most young people rely on this low quality information which in many cases can even be dangerous.
Very powerful speaker, I’ve never heard monotone sound so passionate... Thank you, Dr. Maté.
Edit: For all you savagely defending against this comment, first of all you should realize the word monotone is not an insult unless you make it one. Secondly it is actually a compliment based on the power of Dr. Maté’s message, despite his lack of enthusiasm.
Thank you for the likes and other positive comments.
He doesn’t sound monotone to me. Just calm, confident, not trying to hype anybody up.
It's the music
That is not monotone.
he punctuates it with speed increases and slow downs,
Meso Phelioma He wasn’t monotone. He had some inflection on his tone but it was mostly calm or calculated like most professors.
4 ways culture makes us feel lost
1. Alienation from nature
2. Alienation from People
3. Alienation from Work
4. Alienation from Self
This comment is usless
Fanckjcf20 So be a dick about it.
@@JustAMosca wtf)
@Josh Calkins not really, that's the 4) point
Yes that is the outline of his talk but how he explains and illustrates what those 4 alienations mean and affect us is the crux of his talk.
Society has become extremely disconnected. Its almost hard to watch.
Even worse to experience.
@Michael Tuttle mine did too
Mine taught me that it was a quantum realm in which out brainwaves fluctuate and manifest
Permanently online, yet disconnected.
We aren't made to be alone
Just go your own way. Forget about others and how they perceive you. Do your thing and be happy.
Andrew Patrick other people’s pursuits of happiness imposed on most other people’s attempts to do their own thing and be happy
People aren't happy, the world is unhappy.
That would be nice, however, the beliefs of others inevitably affects everyone.
Andrew Patrick damn why didnt i think of that. just be happy. its that easy apparently. Im going to go be happy now, thanks youtube comment
...and starve or live under the bridge. It has to be some sort of balance, I fully respect dr.Gabor, but we can't go from one extreme to another. We have built this civilization, yes, I know it's way from perfect, or good, but we can't do better now, it's clear... not that we don't want to, we just CAN'T, we carry cave people fears, instincts of gathering, etc... BUT we can try to find a middle road.
To find yourself,
Think for yourself.
.Socrates
You're a lone wolf in a valley of sheep.
its called autonomy and is the number 1 undervalued trait in our society, its certainly the make or break for me when assessing other people for possible connection..... and thats why I don't have many connections
And to truly think for yourself. Don't identify with your thoughts.
Gary O' Can you expand on this?
@@tanadamico8396 you are not your thoughts. Don't label with them. Observe them. Choose positive over negative.
Sorry, I'm too busy to expand on it. But if I could recommend a book it might help.
'The Power of Now' - Eckhart Tolle
The 4 ways to feel found:
1. Connect with nature
2. Connect with people
3. Connect with your work
4. Know yourself
how ?
@@mariek.474 I've started by going back to church, going for walks at my local state park and giving people a chance. One thing could be look someone in the eyes and say hello at the store or ask how they're day is going? Don't be hard on your self, your good enough ✨
Karl Marx would punch your face, for sure.
Have connection with your body before anything else
@@alexb8926 sounds cool
At 3:00 he's essentially talking about "attachment theory" but doesn't call it that. It's why we often ignore our gut feelings about a person in relationships, going toward someone we instinctively know is maybe not right for us, and ignoring that feeling because we are so desperate for love and affection and have an insecure anxious attachment we may not realize, or push away from someone we instinctively know in our gut is really good for us, because we have an insecure avoidant attachment we may not realize.
If anyone on here does this, gets into relationships with the wrong people often, or really wants love and affection but often pushes it away, I implore you to search "attachment theory" here on RUclips and learn what type of insecure attachment you have, so that when you meet someone, you can take your insecure attachment into account, and force yourself away from people your gut says are wrong, or force yourself to do the scary thing and get close to people who you feel are right. We can't "change" our insecure attachments that were ingrained in us by the way our parents reacted to our needs as babies and children, but I think that we can overcome them to an extent with awareness and practice, in order to foster better intimate relationships.
Very well said👍🏾
You have just summed up what it is I need to be researching as I am now 35 years old and still cannot fathom why I always end up giving too much to the wrong guys in a relationship and why I push away the good guys. It's driving me insane and I want to find out more. I have been feeling so alienated from the world these last few years to the point of questioning if this life is worth living. Of course it is... but I need to find out how to make it worth living which is the hard part...
Ok but he is not speaking just about relationships! It would seem that his words triggered your own relationship issues. I did not construe this as a relationship discussion.
Spot on. Attachment injuries are the root at the core of childhood trauma and the emotional dysregulation That manifests from that in adulthood.
thank you.
The most important lesson that they don't teach is : Listen to yourself.
What if want to kill mmyself?
Such a simple yet important lesson. Intuition is powerful.
@@darkcnotion look deeper. Killing not the answer. Heal yourself
These times are the most isolated and alienated I have ever felt in my life. My worry is that this has become my normal.
Dr. Mate has stopped me on several occasions from self harm and OVER SPENDING - I can't see auras but I feel through this box of wire, metal, plastic, glass, his WIFI. Deep in an anemic slug depression, my 5 senses aren't operating much, but this man's genuinely, wisdom, kindly handsome face, ARE HERE. Namaste Dr. Mate
“No infant is born without gut feeling”.....it is so enlightening...(reminds me also how we impose -many times needless -shame on children as they grow up),
I wish my parents had known that when they opted on circumcising me decades ago.
Poor you...should we feel sad about it. Grow a pair and find meaning in your life. Stop blaming your parents
The paradox of our time in history is that we have taller buildings but shorter tempers, wider freeways, but narrower viewpoints. We spend more, but have less, we buy more, but enjoy less. We have bigger houses and smaller families, more conveniences, but less time. We have more degrees but less sense, more knowledge, but less judgment, more experts, yet more problems, more medicine, but less wellness.
We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laugh too little, drive too fast, get too angry, stay up too late, get up too tired, read too little, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom. We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values. We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often.
We've learned how to make a living, but not a life. We've added years to life not life to years. We've been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the street to meet a new neighbor. We conquered outer space but not inner space. We've done larger things, but not better things.
We've cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul. We've conquered the atom, but not our prejudice. We write more, but learn less. We plan more, but accomplish less. We've learned to rush, but not to wait. We build more computers to hold more information, to produce more copies than ever, but we communicate less and less.
These are the times of fast foods and slow digestion, big men and small character, steep profits and shallow relationships. These are the days of two incomes but more divorce, fancier houses, but broken homes. These are days of quick trips, disposable diapers, throwaway morality, one night stands, overweight bodies, and pills that do everything from cheer, to quiet, to kill. It is a time when there is much in the showroom window and nothing in the stockroom. A time when technology can bring this letter to you, and a time when you can choose either to share this insight, or to just hit delete.
Remember, spend some time with your loved ones, because they are not going to be around forever. Remember, say a kind word to someone who looks up to you in awe, because that little person soon will grow up and leave your side. Remember, to give a warm hug to the one next to you, because that is the only treasure you can give with your heart and it doesn't cost a cent.
Remember, to say, I love you to your partner and your loved ones, but most of all mean it. A kiss and an embrace will mend hurt when it comes from deep inside of you. Remember to hold hands and cherish the moment for someday that person will not be there again. Give time to love, give time to speak, and give time to share the precious thoughts in your mind.
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.
Bob Moorehead
Beautiful ❤️💯✨👏I have always tried my best to spread love peace and kindness in this cruel world you deserve more likes than just 8 :o
If I could I'd give you 1k likes beautiful ❤️ 💯✨👏 I've always tried to spread love peace and kindness in this cruel world
Life is short to be overwhelmed by so much greed, hatred and vanity.
Too bad this mostly just America
Thank you!
Dr Gabor Mate is probably one of the greatest human beings alive on the planet right now. This video is a very incomplete slice of his thought provoking talks. I would recommend searching for more of Gabor Mate on here. He has a fountain of wisdom and knowledge to share with those who wish to understand themselves better, and the world we live in better, at a more profound level. Know Thy Self.
Patrick Heaney got any recommendations? Would love to dive into his works & talks
I also like that everything he talks about is vrry relatable and down to earth, not too abstract which makes easy it for people to consume
Gregg Braden, Bruce Lipton, Bill Donahue & Santos Bonaci are great too!
Agree! That's the truth Patrick.
Lawrence Of Canadia
Great / Higher States Of Consciousness
I so admire and respect Gabor Mate.
how culture makes us feel lost: Disconnection.
solution: Connect
[0:22] connect with nature
[0:40] connect with others
[1:01] connect with creativity (in what you do/or how you do it)
[2:05] connect with yourself (spend some time alone [exercise, meditate, or read] to clear your mind)
have you tried turning the culture off for 30 seconds and then booting back on?
What we put in our body is also a huge problem.
#1 is water.
City water systems are bad and plastic bottled water isn't an option because it's highly poisonous with BPA and other estrogen active chemicals.
Also fluoride from the water calcifies pineal gland. Research that.
#2 is food.
I live in rural area in eastern Europe where our grandmas and grandpas grew up on 100% organic food and most of them are in their 90's without major health problems.
Now, many of their children and newer generations eat only meat. Not homemade organic meat, but highly processed meat from supermarket. Alot of them became aggresive, sick, stupid and sad. Some of them died suddenly in their 50's.
People in the villages and small cities don't have damn gardens anymore. It's stupid.
#3 is plastic.
As I said before, plastic is full of estrogen active chemicals. They disrupt our endocrine system (makes us fat, depressed, angry etc.) and those faults are even passed on genetically. No wonder we have so many fat people, 10 year old girls with menstruation and so many gays. Yeah, some people would be gay anyway, but most of them are simply victims of chemicals which fucked up their endocrine system! Alot of them have bipolar disorder and that is simply the proof of my statement. They aren't real gays, they are confused and depressed because of the poison they put inside their bodies.
So yeah, you can try to connect with everything that is said in this video, but it will not work if you poison the basis of this Earthly existance which is your own body.
@@swtoni4464 you are spot on💞
@@swtoni4464 you lost me on the gay part.
@@swtoni4464 being gay isnt related to having more estrogen in your body. You can research on that. Men who mistakenly tried to "balance off" their endocrine system with some other hormones resulted in having more testosteron which was not healthy, which means that they had enough of those hormones.
ISOLATION !!! I don’t even text my friends anymore during this time, I’m close with my friends, but I’ve completely separated myself from them
Careful in the car hope it’s not a deep depression. Please take care and reach out to someone if you need to beautiful lady ✌🏻
True
I hope you get touch in with them soon!
Wow are we living the same life. I rarely text my friends as well.
@Psilocybin texts and phone calls are the only way to interact with others for a lot of people rn thanks to covid
I always felt like my true self was lost.. stolen. I want to regain my true self. I want to regain my heart. My heart feels completely dead.
My greatest connections to life are family, lucid dreaming, and music. An occasional out-of-body experience is refreshing to the spirit, as well. Without these things I would be absolutely lost in darkness.
:) meditation is nice, too, for me. I like energy healing too. It's like sound healing, but even better. You might like it. :)
This is what I found and see, when I go to big malls.
People basically just need Love, instead of Nike, Prada etc.
@Grant Barker Great ♥ thanks for your comment. We just all need ♥ ^^
Explain
Nike has been doing an outstanding work on creating new technology to running and most sport shoes and clothing and it has helped thousands of people to do better in their sports.
Of course we need love to live, and trying to use products and brands to fulfill this kind of gap is illusion. But don't blame products for that. Products of the capitalism are what helped us to grow civilized as a society, and have a good level of comfort and health. Think about hospital technologies, medicine.
Now we can afford living till 90 if we are lucky. Be grateful to products and capitalism, but use it moderately.
Yes, we all need food for the soul. When people can't find it they buy a lot of things
So true. 100
Honest man. A realist? My gut feeling is that he has done prolific work. Very grateful today for this. Thank you Dr. Mate.
@ippos_khloros *example bo jackson steps up to bat. Gut feeling is that shits about to pop off. Now in the hell loop gulch in recent sacred crisis example, gut feeling is a juckstuppose compared to dormant years as younger lovers in the not so younger sun lol seriously plausible. Talking exercises the esophagus.
We are looking for the answers in the very things that are destroying us.
Just Me Beautifully said
HotCheetoThot 420 wishful thinking, willful ignorance
What a Blessed human being. Thank you Dr Gabor
As one must know sadness to truly appreciate happiness, one must also experience the sense of a seemingly meaningless existence in order to fully appreciate one's true purpose.
And many other superficial catch phrases that you can throw around without resolving much
I was depressed for a long long time and after years of feeling hopeless and meaningless something suddenly changed in me, now I feel better than ever and I appreciate life so much more. Even if there are things going wrong in my life I still see the bright side of things. Life is really worth living :)
I think you’re right.
Rodrigue Grange No your response shows you haven't had experience of what he said there. To reiterate...when you have experienced real sadness then you can appreciate happiness. When you do (and you will because it is inevitable...no one escapes real sadness) you'll see.
Sounds to me like you have a good life but believe me, when you hit rock bottom....perhaps even to the point of suicidal thoughts... and emerge from it, you'll remember this.
I remember one day thinking “so what if i die and one day go to heaven and feel happy, happiness is just an emotion and there is no meaning in anything” and when I thought about that I realized how suicidal I sounded. Is that what you mean by sense of a seemingly meaningless existence?
The search for authenictity is so important - its a painful journey, yet the reward is without measure.
How do i look for authenticity?
Wise words from a wonderful man. Great intellectual and a wonderful father too. What a delight to listen too.
The best kind of father. Who was willing to admit -- as he did here -- that there were times when he was less than wonderful.
❤ 🙏
Thank You Gabor.. your gentle wisdom and presence is changing this insanity we face.. and you are making a beautiful difference.. reminding us of who we truly are and holding the greedy ones who profit off the sad and lonely via addiction that they have pushed and pushed in our faces. Thank You. Wanting to feel better is not a crime.
I definitely feel a sense of disconnection from everything. I’ve focused on nothing but how I look, and fitness and how others perceive me, cars etc, I feel happy but it’s a happiness based on peace of mind on being afloat, not real happiness.
I feel the very same way dear feeling lost.
As someone trying to discover myself... I have been thinking and asking a lot of questions. I am happy I found this. It created a good start for me.
Self is an illusion created by thought. Think about it 😆
@@Mugairyuiai I have been reading about that very concept...its insane and it makes sense all at the same time.
@@mikeearls126 The only reason you might think it's insane is because your mind/ego will feel threatened by it and create all sorts of wonderful diversions and escapes for you. It is also not a concept, see above for the explanation as to why it is not a concept 😊 keep going Mike 👍
@@Mugairyuiai i have also been thinking about thisss any books u can recommend???
@@alexis-rl2vo if you can read your own internal book it would be better than any other book on offer. Part of the problem is we are always looking for external solutions religions, gurus etc to follow and then this too becomes part of the problem. If you can see that absolutely clearly, then you are already reading a good book as it were.
If you can't do that, no problem, I will try to point you in a direction. Let me know how you get on🙏
Knowing the problem is one thing, coming up with a solution is totally different. If families can't even agree how can society.
If we can't even agree with ourselves, how can our families?
These talks are always just wishy wishy eutopian truths everyone knows. Never a solution, because there is none.
@@pellman87 Jesus is the only truth in the despair of it all.
I think the first step is to be willing to engage in meaningful, reciprocal dialogue with people who disagree with you. In other words, the exact opposite of what everybody does now. :)
@@Anonymous-bg2cx thanks man, I like to think I'm pretty true during times of despair as well, but it's nice to hear others say it
This is the truth we need .... NO PRETENCE, NO SUBSTITUTES !!
I can watch this on repeat. It's simply hits me in the heart every single time. We need a shift on a fundamental societal level. Fight for "You". Cuz ain't nobody else gonna.
This man is my role model & hero.
Leo Buscaglia, John Taylor Gatto, Joel Salatin, Ashley Montagu, Wendell Berry- Gabor Maté is on my list of wise and far seers.
BrytheP Dear friend it is ok to have a role model but be your own hero☺️
@@nayannbg6314 Thank you Nayan, i'm working on it...=]
@@voluntaryismistheanswer I'll look up those other names...thanks =]
BrytheP ruclips.net/video/mMRrCYPxD0I/видео.html
This guy gave true facts of knowledge for 5 mins.
So true. I love his work and ability to share. Thank you Gabor Maté
Had this saved to watch later and forgot about it. Glad i came around and finally watched it. Wonderful speech!
I feel a bit lost in work being surrounded by people who enjoy the shallow Kim Kardashian culture. When I'm out in the mountains or playing live music with friends my soul gets replenished.
~~ The Stream ~~
Social anxiety; is that me?
I find comfort in classrooms, it’s a place I can breathe.
when I get back home and roomies’ got ten friends over
I retreat to my room like a traumatized soldier
It’s not that I don’t like people, ‘cuz I do
I just can’t relate to your everyday Sue
my tolerance low for meaningless drivel
hear folks unconscious, complain and snivel
about their f***** up reality
or that new show on MTV
or the face on Esquire they’re all tryin’ to be
everyone’s concerned with who fucked who
I’m more concerned why the sky is blue
where does body meet soul?
can the mind find perfection?
is our whole essence captured in the mirrors reflection?
is there more to humans than meets the eye?
or are we just bags of flesh
trying to survive till we die?
is there a higher realm?
is God’s eye the sun?
will Earth become Heaven
when we unite as one?
can we create world harmony?
or is harmony just in music?
is faith just a choice
there if you choose it?
or does it come from within?
does it come from above?
or is it something you catch
like a ball in a glove?
Is to love and be loved
what holds the most worth?
are things that most matter
present from birth?
blessed we are to merely exist
It can end any second with a flick of God’s wrist
so while some are consumed by grades, jobs, and women
I’ll be drinking the spirit of higher livin’
and in the end I may not have a big house or Mercedes
or be followed by swarms of short-skirted ladies
but I’ll have the earth and I’ll have my heart
things that we all have right from the start
so while folks are mining, searching for gold
I’ll be living the life of the divine, of the bold
In this world of wonder I’ll dare to dream
because only dead fish flow with the stream
@@timacree7177 wow I love your comment. Check Mooji channel he has answers for you. Blessings
You need to find higher ground then your current work place.
@@timacree7177 wow i really like your comment.
@@timacree7177 this is beautiful. And yea there are a lot of others who seek truth out of the tv and shows. Who wrote this?
COME on people, lets UNITE again and remember who we are
Nicely sed,but one has to be United with hisself first then all possibility exists
Im with ya
roman szefler then lets do that then unite with eachother.
COME
Jo
This was the BEST I have seen yet about why we feel so bad inside ! For various reasons I was seperated from all four of those things & my family & I am living in a lonely Hell ! Would like to hear more from this man !
Gabor is amazing in his insights. More please! Thank you!
not that insightful. which is a good thing! we were all born with instincts and all of our natural qualities that make us human, so we all feel this deep down but have lost touch in this cultivated word. i cant help but feel sad for u that u think this is an amazing insight, you know?
Cindy Arnold I do agree, this wonderful man talks such a lot of basic sense with deep compassion too.
As an old fella, I can confirm the fact that our society was much happier 50yrs ago. The numbers don’t lie!
I wish I had lived in the 70s
I blame Television! Once Television came to the picture everyone now wants to idolize celebrities that don't give a rats ass about them and try to be like Kim Kardashian or follow popular trends
Brian Andrade Agreed. Idealization is our biggest problem. Once we turn it off, world becomes better again.
Problem is also more and more isolation. More singles, not playing outside anymore but play videogames, no talking but Whatsapp, no small talk in public areas/ transport, its headphones in and eyes on the phone.. and the list goes on
And in just like, about 25 years or something the change is HUGE, the human cant adjust in just 25 years to this.. we are talking about 10000s years of evolution.
We are supposed to bond and live in groups and thats not happening now.
jonathan bacon nostalgia is attractive, don’t be fooled.
What a nicely done complimenting video to this modern day great mind; a humble genius who like us, is also broken. We are not alone, not a one.
Dr Maté, I'm so happy that I found you. I've shared your videos with everyone I know. They have had a huge positive impact on me, inspiring me and giving me hope. Thank you and God bless you and your family.
Marterialism cannot be substituted for genuine meaning.❤️
But corporations spend TRILLIONS to convince us otherwise.
True. People must find meaning in their own lives. Material objects can be used as tools or can be a huge distraction.
This is the thing I have been battling with for so many years. Specifically coming to London gave me a sensation of isolation I had never experienced before. Even when I am in the relationship I always wanted. I try to Re-member or Re-unite with my True Self by going out in nature, become more aware about myself, create and must Be. Because we are human beings not human doings. Completing this comment while ads continue to play about getting rich on Instagram...
Whoever is reading this now, remember:
You are the light! You are unique and worth it! You are blessed to be in your body and experience all that is!
Blessings to all beings!
Love and Light!
Thanks. To be honest, I don’t understand that and I don’t know how to believe it, but I appreciate the sentiment.
@@arnieb3947 take a minute in a quiet place, close your eyes and breathe. Just breathe and feel that you are alive, every single cell is breathing.
By accepting and acknowledging the fact that you exist, recognize how powerful you and your energy are!
Ask yourself what holds you back to believe it and you will get the answers! :)
Blessings!✨❤️
I sure as fuck feel the opposite at this point in life.
🔊Buddha's last message be your own saviour!? "THANK YOU for sharing"👍😎❤
@@spencerlukay5809🔊 "Sit tight & it Will pass, & you will find joy again 🌠👍😎❤
Gabor Maté is spot on! This subject is very rarely discussed in out culture because we want to defend the cause of it and its existence like a collective ego, yet Gabor Maté tells of this perfectly. When one feels incompatible with the culture that he/she/they were born into, that’s alienation. I feel that now, because my culture ‘dictates’ that I _must_ be a ‘gentleman’ and my culture ‘judges’ me as to how I am that cultural egoic icon, but I desire to be ‘me’ whatever that is, ‘gentleman’ or no ‘gentleman’. Culture does not understand the true self of the individual, nor wants to, because of its defence for its existence.
Lovely, and practical. Some time ago, I decided to remove my heart and replace it with an orange flame of self-compassion, which I, and only I are wholly responsible for . Some days it shines brighter than others, but it’s changing my view of love. Love is no longer ‘the one’, or a thing. Love is community.
we are wired for empathy, love, compassion (as he said), but we are also wired for the us/them mentality. Both should be recognized.
us/them is everywhere. "Our football team is better than theirs", "Our country is better than theirs" , Even gangs control different zip codes and are at war with each other. It's who we are.
True..... Human beings are not built for sappy happy love love love only!!
It’s a different kind of wiring though. Empathy, love, and compassion can definitely win over an “us and them” mentality in people. Us and them is mostly an illusion but love is generally seen as one of the realist things about being human. It’s in our nature to understand reality by grouping and differentiating but higher levels of science indicate that we are all really made of the same stuff. We get caught up differentiating abstract ideas that don’t always have a basis in reality and that separates us.
@@VentureHolly whatever the message was it is true that us versus them mentality is deeply ingrained in us and should be recognised for what it is. All you have to do is look at sport teams such as football and see their fan base. It tells you everything you need to know about this. These feelings are very powerful.
Dream TheDream89 recognize these feelings how?
👍🏻 couldn’t have watched this video at a better time in my life! THX
Dr mate is a realist and genius i must listen to him everyday..his voice is reasuring and his thinking is mind alternating that is so badly needed in our lives today..he puts you on a differnt plain with a deeper sence of living a full intence life style and yet still have a relaxed life all at the sametime......he is amazing
RUclips algorithm knows how Ive been feeling lately, the hell
yup
God works in mysterious ways lol
I hope you are seeing a bit of heaven nowadays. Look for the good in all things, Friend.
Hugs to others who feel alienated and were separated from their true self.
I absolutely love these videos...Your voice makes me float back into the chair and brings my whole body into a calm place and then opens my mind and let’s you in...Anyone else?
The fact that we are looking to comfort ourselves watching this type of videos and that there are so many people that feel lost and depressed is very sad. Mental illness is very common and yet ignored or ridiculed by many. Our "leaders" need to pay real attention to this issue.
The world needs love, empathy and guidance. Have a nice day, I'm trying to... but I can't.
Once you start living life without any EXPECTATIONS from others , it becomes amazing ...😊😊
Mustafa Baris very true, and without any expectations of yourself
@@sTeVe-vl3nh …… how droll,… but reality is what gets done
Mariaice133 Yes ... That’s exactly what I mean .. :-) When you live a life without expecting anything from anyone , you can’t be disappointed .. The feeling of disappointment will then start a chain reaction that’s gonna elevate other negative emotions in your psyche and eventually lead you to a place where you not only feel used , let-down , frustrated , negative , confused and disappointed, but also you will start bringing judgment into these emotions that will eventually spiral out of control and effect your state of mind in a negative way ... Instead , if you could give without expecting anything in return , then the feeing of disappointment can’t survive in that form and your state of mind will not be negatively effected ..
Mariaice133 You start living with ZERO expectations by becoming a stronger person , by increasing your self -esteem... Start by spending more time with yourself , I am not talking about driving alone or sitting on the sofa and listening to music ... I am talking about taking yourself on dates , doing a weekend escape , going to a place away from where you live and spending the weekend all by yourself , learning and becoming comfortable living with yourself peacefully and happily ... without having to depend on anyone else to make you feel a certain way ... Once you start doing this , then you will eventually realize it’s really not that girlfriend that’s making you feel disappointed , or your mother making you feel upset because she is being selfish , or your friend letting you down , but it’s your OWN mind ... Once you get a hold of your mind , embrace it , cultivate it , and observe it , then you will have ZERO expectations as your dependency on others and external events diminishes ... 😉😉😉
Mustafa Baris you are very wise! I live with a lot of expectations. My gf broke up with me, did some stuff that she shouldn’t have done that’s embarrassed me, trying to sleep with people I know and I’m so lost. I need to find myself and learn to live with out feeling lonely and depressed. Any kind words would be of help
Valuable five minutes, this is something we need to consider if we are seeking the meaning of life.
2:57 "...something very powerful happens to alienate you from your true self, because world counldn't stand who you really were"
Or a person gives up on his/her difference and thinks he or she must be the same as everyone else to fit in
@@northstar5919 same thing
Dr. Gabor Maté is a treasure to humanity.
Aaron falls very close to the tree. His father is amazing. Kudos to the Matè family.
Just what I needed to hear and see this morning to get my "feet back on the ground", and my attention down in the body. (From the head)
Thanks! 💓
💜 ✨ 💛
I work as a software developer and am currently sick with shingles.
I put it down to the stress of working in an industry where being a jerk is seen as being a value worth following.
On many occasions my team lead has praised himself for being nasty or cruel.
You might want to consider another line of work. You sound like you may be too humane to be in that environment. You're at odds with yourself. You need the job but the paradigm you work within is not in keeping with your values. Shingles is serious. I know it's easy for someone to just say "get out" . Bills have to be paid. At least set your sights on leaving while you work there. Look -you have ONE life. YOU decide how you want to live it. Never mind what you're corporate buddies have to say. I 've spoken to many people who worked in the corporate world and then figured out that it took too high a toll on their well being.
@@bellavia5 very wise words and thank you for the 'tough love' I think I do need to get out of the industry👍
@@Slarti You're welcome.
That person is an empty soul. He has no pride. He is very weak inside if he thinks he is a man because he is cruel..He is a coward and a bully.
@@bellavia5
I have had shingles 3 times in my life and it's no picnic. All 3 times in the same location. Now I have what is called shingles neuropathy, where the same nerve root has been infected so many times that it becomes damaged, causing a chronic localized pain similar to fibromyalgia, but only in 1 spot. Each time it was stress related, & sounds the same in Slartibartfast's situation.
I was a Registered Nurse for 35 years. In what you would think is the most humane profession in the world, it has become infected with the corporate mentality in very short order. 1st came the patient is our customer, which was quickly followed with the patient & the family are both our customers. Once that realization dawned on the patients & the families, came the familiar idiom that, "the customer's always right." So when the patient picks & chooses which medications they're gonna take, orders out & eats an entire pizza every night, and can't be found for breathing treatments or vital signs because they're downstairs smoking every 15-20 minutes, we're supposed to grin & bear it. Or when the family wants the other bed in a double room to be kept empty so that 8-12 family members can create a makeshift shelter in place & stage a 'round-the-clock sleepover in the patient's room, we're supposed to grin & bear it, provide everyone with pillows & linens, try not to step on anyone, or wake anyone up while doing rounds & care. Oh, and fill their cooler with ice or their thermos with coffee. Regardless of the request, from the serious to the ridiculous, we had a policy that mandated we say, "Why of course, I've got all the time in the world." Which to me, was the professional equivalent of saying, "You want fries with that?" We had to take mandatory annual training in customer relations that would put the Gap to shame. Now, Medicare & Medicaid have jumped on-board. Patients AND families can leave and are encouraged to leave comments about the hospital stay on their website and rate the hospital. You can imagine what these look like, based on how wonderful all these YT comment sections are and how Amazon's product ratings turn out. Except that 20% of a hospital's reimbursement is now based off these comments & ratings. I have one question for you, and I already know the answer: Would you rather be treated by a healthcare system that places value in the quest for advancements in care & good patient outcomes (you lived/survived) or a healthcare market driven by and geared towards consumer perception (outcomes don't matter, only obtaining and maintaining that golden 5-star status)?
I used to love being a nurse. I got great professional as well as personal satisfaction from my career, except for the last 8-10 years. I'm glad my career came to an end when it did. I was an old school dinosaur who saw my time flourish and then come to its end. I would advise our friend here to use his current job and talents to keep the lights on, all while fishing for other opportunities, making good connections with business clients, and networking. You'd be surprised at how many opportunities you can get 1st notice on when you start to use your job & position as a stepping stone, rather than being stepped on your entire corporate career. Or being a software developer, create an app on your own time. There's an open field there. Create a few, move to an area you can love with a lower cost of living, and learn to live off the residual. Life's too short to be miserable. I saw a study once that proved work you don't enjoy is perceived as 85% harder than it actually is. That's quite a burden to bear, along with being miserable. And as one person said, "If you find a job you love, you'll never work a day in your life."
Most powerful video I have ever seen! Just hit me very hard! Feel like I should cry!
This message is to everyone reading this have faith do not live in fear we all have a purpose to serve this world to make it a better place Share this video with everyone no matter what much love God bless everyone
Likewise brother and God bless you! ❤️ne love
We are brainwashed and programmed to think, speak, dream and worship empty brain numbing soul sucking numbers. Leaving us feeling empty and lonely. Because loveless lifeless numbers are completely absent of light, warmth, love, joy, magic, meaning, beauty and wisdom.
steve coley Yes, people are becoming enslaved and they are none the wiser to this insidious dis-ease. Completely unaware of giving their precious energy away.
@@christyfox4624 what do we do instead? And how?
Amen 💜🌙🍃🙏
Sounds like simpering scapegoating.
Try living without making up artificial external enemies.
Christy Fox this have existed since the first human intelligent civilization but just like us the system evolved and the “things” that control us and keep us deeply asleep have more tools now to keep us intact bowing to there will I am tired some days I choose to live by my own rules and what I want not what the system want me to be or do this is frustrating but sadly it was always there long ago your and my birth it have always been there we are just starting to see it now
"All we have to do, not an easy task but certainly available to us, is to get back to our true nature"
He hit the nail squarely on the head! I've watched quite a bit of his material and couldn't agree more!
It's incredible how much in tune I am with this channel! I hope the videos never stop coming, we need this content in our lives.
Who the hell on earth (369 dislikes at this moment 05/22/19) would dislike these beautiful words from this beautiful man??? They must be alienated from themselves.
It’s this new thing that is trending called “ having an opinion”.....
@@mrcwoodworks4523 hahaha
David Spencer- Máte said so much without saying anything at all. Left with questions...how does one lose one self and what is true nature. Empathy - too much left unsaid. Sounds like truth layered bullshit. I grew up being told listen to your gut instinct. I reserve the right to thumbs up or down. Yay internet! 👍
@@EileenMRyan well, it could seem like that if this is the only thing you've heard from him. I have heard him go very in-depth into the hows and whys in many other videos.
David Spencer the truly unaware and unawakened will downvote this message. There are many, way too many that want society in complete chaos and need to see the degradation and collapse of society. I’m sure they stand to benefit in some way financially from a lost and disconnected society! To many here the ONLY journey is creating chaos.
Gut feelings are instincts. Not something you learn from experience, rather something you are born with. Many animals have them, pretty much necessary for survival.
He didn`t say we learn them. He said we learn to suppress them.
This man's awesome. I'm sure he's seen a lot and I'm glad to listen to his words, so comforting. Thanks Dr. And I'll add that you shouldn't search the meaning of life or God, cause you'll end completely MAD. The meaning of this life is just one:"Live It". The trick is to live it the best you can and overcome all the Fuc**ng problems you're in during it. Live it till the end and accept all its consequences with love, cause you'll see that you know not other thing but living life as it is. Search YOUR truth, cause YOU have all the answers to all your questions. Notice that God is in yourself and when you talk to others you're doing nothing but talking to yourself. Practice silence and meditation, such as yoga or some kind of subject that nurtures your inner-being and do nothing but LIVE, LOVE and DON'T THINK TOO MUTCH. Give a time to every single thing you want to do in this live, cause there's no time enough. Love 🙌❤✌😉
What a brilliant speech. Thank you for sharing!
I drowned when I was 13 years old in 20 foot surf on the Gold Coast. I drowned and had an NDE. I won’t go through the whole experience but the reason why I’m saying... or should I say leaving a comment here is...about the gut feeling this man is speaking of. Where ever I was when I died the energy (god for lack of a better human word) that was speaking to me and through me and of me and about me said the exact same thing, you will hear me speak to you when you get that Uneasiness in your stomach. Remember my child this is me giving you direction. Never ignore my advice.
what do you mean by this energy was "speaking" to you?
@@miranx5735 - Thanks for your reply. It’s very very hard to describe something that is not of this world. I use the word energy meaning I felt for lack of a better word, electricity and walked around me and go through me. I never felt a human presents meaning Jesus or Mohammed etc. It was more of a universal light.
Thank goodness you made it ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
@@perciousmatter7001 - thank you. Death changed my life knowing it is DEFINITELY NOT THE END.
Wow... thanks for sharing 🙏🏽
I love how the mountain bike trail ride made this video! I live where I can’t ride...and I am sad. I guess i should trust my gut and get back to the mountains
Gabor mate is one of my favorites. And this short video is very inspiring.
This guy talks so much sense, today this world is falling apart on every level.
and it's so hard to become aware of that! few are those who see this world in the seed, rather than blindly accept it for what it is. It's really really difficult to gain that perspective. seems like suffering is one of the ways to get there, for better or for worse.
I really just have alienation from nature. Growing up in La it’s weird to be in a place where nothing is older than 100-200 years and it makes you feel disconnected from history
This is why I hate LA. All they care about is money and clout. That's why porn stars and reality shows and actors and rappers and all people who don't care about the meaning of life live there.
I love LA. Great beaches, hikes, angel's crest is an amazing drive when i want to take a break. Go up north and hit santa barbara if you feel like it.
EVERYTHING is made out of nature. It's everywhere if you know How to look at it.
I want to focus on loveliness in my existence.
Let's do it.
Let's. :)
C’mon
We need to connect and form our support group!!
@Lisa Haha I'm so down.
@@MeimeiLovesmusic Hell yeah man
It's so nice to read the comments and see/realise there are many others searching for the same thing (or why else would you be here? 🙂) but so sad that you rarely meet people in person to share these feelings with.
Sometimes you have to go against your Gut feelings to achieve something worthwhile. Short term distress for long term gain.
Sad how it looks like most people at that meeting were already over 50.
@lee cee The message is effective when delivered to younger generations
Gordymax - People over 50 matter too. We were raised in this society as well. Everyone, at every age, should hear this information (or at least to be reminded of Dr. Mate's points). With a little luck and good self-care you'll be over 50 someday too :D
@@drunkvegangal8089 i think what he was trying to say that is sad that young people are not interested in the subject but are out and about chasing emptiness.
II II - in which case, you are 100% correct. That would be discouraging!
That's because they're the hippies who helped bring on the 'Woe is us and Marxism is the answere' stuff.
I have been saying this for many years, we have lost the holistic values of living more balanced lives
Genius and empathy. Much respect, Dr. Maté.