I was in a mixed state and was hiding in the corner of my closet. My husband came in and asked how I was. I said, "I feel small." My husband sat down next to me and asked, "Can I be small with you?"...I never felt so understood.
My partner does little things like this too and I hope to god that I don't mess it up because I love him so much. I don't think I will mess it up though, I care far too much to let that happen!
I'm so glad to have found this community...maybe there is hope for me dealing with my husband....sometimes I feel so helpless and lost what to do or say. I almost lost him this weekend in more ways than one. I'm going to watch more of your videos and maybe feel better equipped...I think I do ok...its been 15 years and he's still alive and with me💜
Thank you so much for the kind words and I’m glad that you found our community here. It sure feels good to not be so alone dealing with these kinds of things. There is a lot of really good information here. Close to 100 videos available. There’s another great resource I’d like to share, a book, called “loving someone with bipolar disorder” by Julie Fast. It’s fantastic for relationships. If you would ever like to connect or have any questions, there is a link in my video descriptions where you can join our Patreon community, whilst supporting my advocacy work. -Rob
Thanks so much for acknowledging our deep daily distress and our ability to put one foot forward each day, hour, minute, despite how we feel. Celebrate each triumph, no matter how small it may seem. BP warrior.
It’s seldom outright said, but the general attitude many members of my family took with regard to our differing religious and political views was, “You are manic, therefore you are wrong.” They basically used it as an excuse to dismiss me. The “flight of ideas” thing does happen to me a lot during mania, but that doesn’t make them bad ideas. It’s just that there are too many to keep up with.
Hey there ! Rob is available on patreon. You can message him, text or even have a call with him there. For a very limited time he is offering free support phone calls for all patrons right now in which he can lend an ear, give advice or answer questions. Take gentle care. Sometimes we all need someone to talk to: www.crisistextline.org/ teenlineonline.org/talk-now/ Dianna Polar Warriors Team Member (H)old (O)n (P)ain (E)nds On Patreon, you can message Rob directly, get a phone/video call, watch videos that are more personal in nature, and access a great community. www.patreon.com/PolarWarriors
So I have been with woman two years she has bipolar disorder I never know where I stand with her she never talks about her feelings anymore I have thought about leaving but I love her very much and she has said she dosent want me to go are there any videos books or classes I can take to understand her better anything specifically about how best to love and support a person with this condition
Hi, thanks for reaching out. The best way to talk to Rob directly is through Patreon. He responds to direct messages only on that platform. If you are already a Patron, just cut and paste what you wrote into a message and put the recipient as Polar Warriors and that is Rob exclusively. Take care! Dianna Polar Warriors Team Member (H)old (O)n (P)ain (E)nds Rob: I really need your help to keep a good thing going here... PLEASE consider supporting Polar Warriors work on Patreon. Even just $1 a month makes a huge difference. Thank you so much
Been diagnosed nearly 15 years here. Something I’ve learned and would like to add: sometimes, a person who is struggling with mood may not be able to make decisions when asked small questions like “what do you want to eat?” Or even “are you hungry?” Or “do you want to go for a walk?” Its helpful for me when my loved ones just take over those little decisions, saying things like “let’s go for a walk together” or simply putting food in front of me when they’re eating as well. Sometimes making small, simple choices like what to eat when I’m very unwell is just difficult, and it helps to have someone step in like that.
Very good point Vic! I knew someone at my support group and her friends would drop off coffee and her mom would visit and do the dishes for her if she was depressed. The key is to communicate with our loved ones what works when we are feeling well so that they know when the time comes. Dianna Polar Warriors Team Member (H)old (O)n (P)ain (E)nds Rob: I really need your help to keep a good thing going here... PLEASE consider supporting Polar Warriors work on Patreon. Even just $1 a month makes a huge difference. Thank you so much
Agree to that one! Little decisions are sooo hard...sit still ruminating gets paralyzing, AA even says "Move a muscle, change a thought"...walking/eating healthy
@@healcptsd6467 Yes please write or make a call as you will feel better & your sister & brother in law will be glad you recognise & appreciate their efforts helping you. 🍪pocket.
I totally agree with your comment Vic Fleenor, having a friend or loved one step in & take over those little decisions can be so helpful. I've suffered with bipolar disorder since 18years of age, wasn't fully diagnosed til my early 30s. I'm now 58yrs old & managing quite well at times yet when I'm struggling with my mood, actions of others helping me out is more helpful then talking & asking me questions. My partner often asks me to go out on a walk, I often don't want to or have no motivation yet he says "come on you'll feel much better after some fresh air etc" Just by getting dressed & going for a walk with him helps me so much even if it's' a short walk. The food issue is hard for me, not being able to cook for myself it's so helpful to have a meal placed down in front of me when I'm very unwell too. Having a pet is something I've found helps me as I have something to love & care for. I have to get up in the morning to feed & see to my cat, which I've owned for almost 18years. 🍪pocket.
Take modafinil, well butrin and bromantane you feel much better in depression At least you will feel 50% better I do take them when depressed Like today Tomorrow i have to boost my self with bromantane It works like magic T3 800 to 1000mcg Works well every day
Hello Rob. I have bipolar disorder and I'm a psychologist myself. Your videos are amazing and I'm glad that you are doing such a great thing. I'm a regular viewer of your channel and I always share your videos to my family and friends. But none of them watches them or takes measures for me. They are very supportive but not they way you describe in this channel. I majored in guidance and counselling. But even with my knowledge in psychology, I can't do this alone. I'm 28 years old and single. Just recovered from a nasty episode in which I almost killed myself. Your videos helped me recover much faster. Thank you so much for your amazing efforts :)
@@PolarWarriors thank you for your kind words. I really appreciate your time and effort even replying to my comment. Let's all work together and beat the stigma that exist about bipolar disorder :)
Hi! My psychiatrist thinks I may have BD, also I'm a clinical psychologist, it would be so helpfull if I ask you some questions. Could we chat or have a conversation? Please.
Thank you for sharing your story. Thank you Bipolar warrior for being the helping hand in time there's no one around a depressed girl or guy 😔 I had BD around 12 yrs old, love it hate it, it has become a long time friend. I studied psychology in hoping to overcome this by myself but realizing I can't. I felt so unworthy and untalented, I switched a lot and now working in elderly home. I always remember of the career path that I lelf. With my knowledge, I guide my family how to help me during my weak days. They just don't show interested, too much information, they don't have time, and always said religious thing would heal me. They blame me for not living a healthy lifestyle, just follow vegan, organic, detox, yoga all kinds of "healthy" lifestyle and I would be fine, just like them. I'm living in a foreign country now to escape the sad reality that my family make my situation worse. This channel has become the family member I know I would never had. 😢 Someone to listen to and feeling not so alone.
Loved #10 the most. The idea that someone needs us, wants us in their life, even when we're symptomatic, goes a long way to counteract the false conviction the depression sells -- that everyone would be better off if we were gone.
As someone who has loved another with bipolar and at times hasn't known what to say or do except just be there, it means a lot to know this actually does help.
This is a constantle struggle with my daughter everytime she has an episode. It could be over something so small but to her it is the whole universe crashing on her.
My partner thinks I shouldn't be involved or even educate myself for fear of being controlled. Is that common? Should I just leave it n hope for the best?
@@MelissaHillikerNPets No it's not Silly at all. I try to get my husband to watch a video or read an article. He says he "Knows" how I feel but he doesn't. When I'm agitated he thinks I'm being mean. We've been married almost 24 years but I just don't feel understood by anyone. Even my medical Drs don't understand. I think my psychiatrist is the only one who understands. I just feel like a failure. I've been diagnosed since 2003. I've had depression most of my life. I think there shouldn't be any stigma but it's still bad. People don't recognize us as having an illness. They think Mental illness is different but it's not any different than for instance my asthma. Thanks for your comment. God bless you! 🙏🏻✝️😌
@@julesservantofjesus972 unfortunately people don't understand there is so much depth to disorders. "Small" things in communication can be explained by disorders but people don't understand that because they don't look into them. That unfortunately adds to the stigma :( praying for you and your husband!
@@MelissaHillikerNPets That's so true! Thanks so much for your prayers! Praying for you as well! I saw on your channel you have furbabies & love Chewy! 🐶🐶 We have 2 Shih Tzus & we are always ordering from Chewy! Hope you have a great week! 🙏🏻✝️🤗🙋🏼♀️
Thank you Rob. So often I just want someone to be in the room with me. They don't have to say or do anything, I just don't want to be alone. I'm so glad you brought this up.
1. Give them permission to not be okay 2. What happened or what’s going right 3. You have every right to feel the way you feel 4. Don’t say anything 5. Validate feelings 6. Empathy (I don’t know but I can relate) 7. Find what works for them 8. Offer reassurance 9. Let the person know you believe them 10. Let the person know how important they are in your life
I have it and my dad tries to derail the conversation and tells me something positive like how beautiful my kids are and what a beautiful soul I have and that he loves me no matter what and he is never going to leave me ever My mood calms down and I'm up lifted
Watching these bipolar videos breaks my heart. I think my daughter (15) has it and I don't think I've been very helpful. I hate that I may have been making it very hard for her....so sad and angry at myself. I am watching any video and reading anything I can to learn about how to help her. Also, I read the comments so I can hear from people who have it and maybe learn from them too. Thank you so very much for all the information I'm getting so I can help my daughter.
You're doing better than my mum ever did. Instead of helping me calm down when I was angry, she'd get insulted and get even more mad and say things that did nothing but provoke me even further until I was screaming at her. Then she'd blame shift and make me look like a raving lunatic while claiming she was the victim who did nothing wrong. I can't tell you how many times I wanted to kill myself because of her.
The mother of my child is bipolar and it feels like 1 week of the month shes happy and the rest of the time she is miserable and so negative it breaks me down mentally. I'm so worried my daughter will grow up with it too and I debate if it's worth staying together.
So grateful for these suggestions. They’re incredibly helpful. As someone with a loved one who has BP, I want you to know that the information you provide in these videos has made it possible for me to improve how I communicate with my loved one, to avoid taking so many things personally, and to have the courage to set boundaries, which has made all the difference in our relationship. Thank you, Rob, for your invaluable work. In all sincerity, you make a huge difference in the lives of those with BP and in the lives of people like me, their loved ones. 🙏🏼
Thanks for posting this. I was one who asked a year ago what would be the best 10 things to say rather than not to say on your video. Back then, I had so much time and patience for the love of my life with Bi-polar. Slowly but surely her actions have killed virtually all that love. She has used and abused. I tried. My friends all said walk away from day 1. I still haven't completely but I know it's too toxic and draining. Every man in this woman's life has turned and walked away. I was determined not to be one of them. I've all but failed. All the best to you Rob.
Yes, the depression isn’t the hardest part to deal with for me. The untrue narratives they believe, repeat over and over, and attribute to God really irk me. Also the unreasonable anger (anger dysphoria) and the justification of those anger outbursts that occur during mania is much harder for me to deal with than the depression. I love listening to Polar Warriors because he takes responsibility for his own behavior rather than denying it, justifying it by spiritualizing the situation or by blaming someone else. He allows others to give him feedback about his irrational thoughts and tries to adjust, unlike my BP relationships. Maybe those I am dealing with are both BP and narcissists?
@@dahrunriver2924 yes I know what you mean. The diagnosed bi polar woman I was with had the most narcissistic personality possible and whilst I could see the bi polar symptoms in the background it was ultimately the narcissistic abuse that killed me and my love for her. Rob's ownership of his condition, his openness to be a better person and to heal himself is a sign of great character. Thanks for sharing Dahrun. Your shoulders are broader than mine. Best wishes.
Stuart Bible Thanks for the compliment but I still have a long road ahead. I read a lot of Dr George Simon’s work when dealing with the narcissistic tactics. At first it was overwhelming but I am slowly learning how to set boundaries with them.
Thanks for these positive tips. I’m Bipolar II & retired so I’ve been through lots of up & down symptomatic episodes. I live alone but have lots of rescue animals I care for. Sometimes my special dog & cat friends can help me when I’m depressed. They sense my moods & are always there to snuggle when I get into a depressive sleep phase. If I hadn’t had the animals to take care of, I seriously doubt I’d be here today. So I think a purpose or mission can help.
I have my animals also and because of them I fight hard because no one will love them like me and one they put to sleep being he is a pit bull but a gentle one...I am thankful for him especially
My husband is great about saying the right thing to show that he cares. Instead of saying 'you should feel good about..' he says 'how does that make you feel?' Or 'how do you feel about that?'. The right words can make a huge difference. Thanks Rob. 🙂
"It's ok to feel like that. I'm here for you. I can't imagine how it feels." Don't ask "what's wrong?" Ask "What happened?" "You have every right to feel that way." (Don't say anything) Just be quiet. Leave the room. Give them a hug. Give them a cup of coffee. Don't compare suffering. Offer them company. Be there for them. Validate the way they feel. Empathy: "I can relate to how you feel." Figure out what works for them. ---> "What helps you the most? What works for you?" Offer assurance----> "You aren't alone. This too shall pass." Let them know you believe them. "I believe you." (this is validating) Let them know how important they are to you. "I'm glad you have not given up. I need you in my life."
This was so helpful. It's like you were talking about my son and I and the issues I am having with him. I love him so much but feel like I'm at the end of my rope. There is nothing more I can do to help him and he won't help himself. This video has given me strength to not give up on him and not to take what he says and does so personally eventhough it really does hurt. I'm going to keep trying to approach him about seeking help. I also will have to stand firm to my boundaries for his sake. This illness has torn our family apart but I won't abandon him. I'm all he has left and I love him.
Thank you so much for this. I’ve had such a hard time talking to my daughter for years about her bipolar disorder. She refuses to take meds. This makes communicating with her close to impossible but I refuse to give up. Your vids are giving me some hope for a breakthrough.
I have a hard time my loved ones don’t understand bipolar. I’ve been very manic lately and my dr upped my medication. I told my partner I feel drugged and not well. He has a physical sickness and said he was the unwell one. If I’m super upset I self harm but I’ve really been trying to get past that. It’s funny I usually feel depressed but i felt really good lately not knowing I was manic. I thought wow I finally feel happy. I hope everyone is having a good day !
I've been diagnosed with Type 1 since I was 11, I just turned 21 and being in my first almost successful relationship with anyone in my entire life other than my father, who is also severely bipolar, I've finally decided to try learning about what it is that puts me off kilter. I hope you understand how important this is, thank you for doing this with your life.
It's weird how I realized I have no idea how to deal with a depressed person even though I've been having it for ten years. I was pleasantly surprised that #4 was on the list. It does seem to work! Everybody is different, some need space, some need company, sometimes it's both at different times. Stay strong!
It’s important with 10, not to use the words I’m glad you haven’t committed suicide. Stay with words like he was saying .. I’m glad you’re in my life, that you don’t give up, that you try your hardest, etc. using “suicide” can trigger ideations
I'm complicated. If I'm depressive, I prefer that someone straight up ask if I'm having suicidal thoughts because it kind of wakes up my brain to help me admit my thoughts. If I'm manic, I would rather I be asked am I having any negative thoughts because I don't comprehend sadness during my mania. Suicide results in a "well I am now" reaction. Negative thoughts reminds me to explore the pessimistic side of my blind optimism.
On point 1 just permission to feel the way they do.. reminds me of the most powerful words a Dutch famous person told my mother the same day I went to her to take care of her dog while she was getting ready to be hospitalised for chronic issues and giving up. "Every emotion is a good emotion" basically so long as you feel something you're alive and there's hope. I ended up making a bird with a scroll with those words with 3d pen that she keeps in her living room to remind her no matter how much her physical and brain problems (lot of forgetfulness as if dementia after head surgery to remove large menigioma) . No matter if bipolar or other I feel that no one should be judged for the way they feel. Great video all around! Thank you for putting this up here
In my algebra class my teacher called on me and I just felt like I couldn’t say anything for an answer, and later in the classroom my teacher comes up to me and says sorry if I was uncomfortable being called on and I told her I was fine just my brain doing tricks. And she seemed to understand me and respectful about me and my mental issues for how they affect me and not think I am doing things on purpose.
Personally, I have Bipolar II, which generally shows itself as depression, if anything. Even with that experience, it's still really hard to know exactly what to say. Sometimes I'll find myself unintentionally insensitive. Thanks for the video to guide me!
I loved your analogy with the eggs. people in my life have literally said that to me. reality evaporates on me when I'm symptomatic... nothing said to me usually helps, but acts of kindness do. like the coffee you mentioned, or dropping off homemade cookies at my door with a note that just says' thinking of you'... I need space as I wrestle with everything going on in my head. but these random acts of kindness indirectly letting me know they care... as you mentioned, it might not look like it helps right away, but it can make all the difference in the world.
I'm glad I watched this. Concerning #10, someone close to me who has been diagnosed with BPD opened up to me recently about suicidal feelings they've had over the years, and it broke my heart to think of losing them but I didn't know how I should frame that sentiment to them without making it sound like I was centering the discussion around myself, and I didn't know how to make it sound like I wasn't saying their life's value was in any way proportionate to how they impact me personally. I wish I had seen this video before that conversation, but I will definitely keep this entire video in mind when having these sorts of discussions in future.
Anyone else have trouble keeping up with just daily task? I just can’t seem to stay on top of daily life. Idk if I am just lazy or systematic. Do you have any videos about that? I am going to check in your list to see. Thank you for all you do!
I believe All of society is having that issue right now and that's great for them but for those of us who have been having that issue for a long time and now it's even exacerbated more I just don't know what to do. It happens to me too but clearly is worse now. I just try to do 1 thing... Then maybe another. I hope this stops for you, it sucks bad.
Emily I agree right now most of my energy goes to work and my seven year old. I am a single mom to top it all off. Lol I am glad to hear it isn’t just me. I was really beating myself up over it.
de marullo well, this is where I am at, I just don’t have any energy to keep up the housework. I look around and say I have to get this done, yet that is as far as it gets then next thing I know I am falling asleep.
You are not alone...I am in a mixed cycle, start stop start stop, nothing finished (and if I Do finish, I don't "Care"- ugh)...This channel is Amazing, I send it to my therapist and she shares it with other bps
i have borderline personality disorder and my partner is bipolar i love these videos because i am so in the dark with what to do and sometimes the emotions tend to clash with my bpd, thank you for the help you provide. im sure it has saved lives.
Thanks for your many videos , I now know what happened in what I thought was a wonderful relationship some 20 years ago. The numerous episodes have churned in my head for over 17 years. This is such a devastating mental disorder, especially for a partner who is trying to figure it out. Without proper meds that should be accompanied by talk at least once a month let alone once a week preferably, there is no hope for a relationship to go on😢.
I'm glad to have found this channel, albeit late. I'm bipolar II and its a struggle, besides my family dont understand what bipolar is. I stopped all meds and occasionally take Valium for anxiety. My hypomania is honestly worse (i'm self destructive)than my depressive state. I'm glad to learn I'm not alone in this struggle.
Oh god...I just stumbled on this video looking for something to help me with my husband. We've been together for 15 years now and it's getting worse. So bad this weekend I felt I was losing the battle as well...I feel like I have PTSD sometimes when he has his episodes. He hasn't been diagnosed, but you know. ..I am so glad I'm not alone💜
11 years with my SO and he's recently diagnosed BP and i know i have depression issues. I feel like i fail every single day at everything i try to do for our family
@@mamakfamily9576 you aren't failing!! Keep trying to focus on the good things. You have made it this far and now with a diagnosis you can work together!
This is my first time here, how interesting this is, I have been dealing with a child who only now has been diagnosed , listening and learning is something I want to learn about as she is 18, and I now am the full time career of her baby, of 5 months . This illness is so hard to understand, but now hearing from you about the do’s and donts helps me out in so many ways. So I’m still learning to understand what she is going thru for your perspective, and I’m willing to do anything to help her , she is 1 of 8 . So thank you 🙏 for your insights to this illness. I still have a long way to go. Learning that is…. Sydney, Australia 🇦🇺
Hi Rob, what do you do if no one can figure out if im bipolar 2 or somewhere along the spectrum or if its unipolar? I consulted 12 Psychiatrists over the years and always get a different answer. Im stuck in depression for years.
I love the expression you use that your loved one may be "temporarily unavailable" it puts so much into perspective when you think of it that way. The words reiterate that the episode is temporary and will pass we just have to be patient with them and we can't expect them to be available in the way we know them to be when they aren't experiencing an episode. Thank you for that language.💕
And again a excellent video without a single cut in it. You are putting the bar high for yourself ;-) I found point 10 a good one. But on the other hand something I struggle with is hearing how important I am for my family. It makes me feel pressured and often guilty for not ''being there'' so often. It makes me feel better when they say they manage fine without me. Or when I see they have a great time without me as well as with me. I don't know if you can relate to that. I would only say that kind of thing when someone is really going towards suicidal. The only reason I am still alive is because I know how much it would hurt my family and specially my children if I would do it. But (in my case) someone doesn't need to tell me that. I could figure that out by myself. But maybe that's not so easy for others. I don't know. It's different for everyone.
About to send this video to my mom. Sent me into a pissed mania yesterday while I was kinda happy and optimistic about my future. But like always she told me how to feel, to stop overthinking, and if you did this months ago you wouldn’t be dealing with this now. Well I’m dealing with it now and trying to fix it but thanks for reminding about what I didn’t do that I’ve felt guilty as fuck for longer then most people feel guilty ever in their life. And also reminding me that I wasn’t doing what I should at the time because I was busy living the great life of sleeping 12-18 hours a day and not talking to anyone for weeks. So fucking annoying. I’ve tried and tried to explain it to her and show her your videos and she temporarily reacts positively but a few months later it’s back to the start. Damn. It’s like guys yelling at a girl for her period and she explains and he’s fine for a month and starting all over again. So like always I said I don’t choose this but go yell at a blind guy and tell him how to feel since he chooses it. Sadly though. I’m sure she still doesn’t get the point. She can more than likely relate to a blind person more then myself because it’s possible to play pretend blind from what I know. Not sure how someone plays my brain kinda sucks ass off and on. Maybe if they think of funerals and how they feel and think of their happiest times partying while younger and thinking of how all of that is a reasonable way of explaining my feelings but the most important part to understand that those extreme emotions the relate with are emotions that I also have but happen as easy as flipping a light switch. They get the just of most of it. But she has no idea that her 1 min of talking was a light switch that sent me into an emotional feeling of being like my best friend just was hospitalized from getting jumped by a guy I know and put him in a coma. So I have a lot of anger while adrenaline to go defend and stick up for my friends suffering with some worry and anxiety sprinkled in. I could care less what almost all people think and say to me. But loved one just don’t understand that their words are like playing Russian emotional roulette. So tired of being irritated as shit for hours and days by people I love that most likely forgot what they said 5 mins within me leaving their house and going on with their daily routine while I leave struggling to not drive and get a bottle of vodka, drive 100mph for the anger rush, go gamble, go buy some pot, find some pills to abuse, and so on. All sounds stupid as shit to a normal mentally healthy person. But if people are like me when it comes to my bipolar. Those options I already know for a fact sound wayyyy better then going home like I did and still being pissed the next day and dealing with all of this while knowing a crash is coming with depression. So why not go get fucked up rather then spend another min of my life feeling this hell for the countless number of times. But I know now that it’s just worse with the choice of drugs and so on. But people should be aware that many people abuse stuff out of only trying to not hate life and it’s hard to judge a person for trying to escape hell. Wish the world realized that way the powerful that I’m assuming know this would stop using us to profit from us doing all the work to make them money from our mental illnesses. Hey let’s put someone in a cage because the hate their life and feel like dying. Even better let’s do it to the point of maximum capacity with a vast majority feeling relatable feelings. Super fucking idea on how to rehabilitate a person. Maybe put a lion, tiger, bear, crocodile, wolves, and some bunnies in a cage to make friends because they were isolated and acting odd for their species. Pretty much will go as good as putting mentally ill in prison. Just my opinion and way of saying with a very reasonable analogy that’s so easy to understand the point I’m trying to make that there’s no way that the powerful are assholes for the most part that use us and sadly our loved ones can’t grasp what they will never relate to anymore than I’ll know what giving birth feels like. No vagina so obviously I’m not knowing that feeling ever. Just like no fucked up mental issues then no clue of how we almost need to start making new words to specify what our happy/mania and depression is compared to everyone saying their feeling depressed because they have to work Saturday or whatever lol. No that’s called a bummer dude. And your happy about the day off isn’t like mania because I’m happy. Doubt they’ve ever been so happy they went to work smiling at the boss and said not today with a smile and quit, drove at 150mph on a highway to the casino and played poker for 24 hours while drinking crown and cokes without any stimulants other then the boring version of unhealthy coke from that sugar lol. Oh and I just remembered having fun at the poker table laughing and taking a drink that went down wrong and I coughed it up spitting my drink right in the face of a guy 15-20 years older than me and he looked like he had smiled 3 times in his life but killed as many things as leaves of camo on his outfit. Haha most awkward moment of feeling like that asshole I’ve ever experienced. Still funny but damn it got awkward at that table except for me drinking and manic. I was polite and apologized and bought the guy some drinks. But I would of shit myself if I was balanced and in my normal introverted mood. But yeah people should get that your happy isn’t mania. And I forgot I’m sending this video to my mom. Doubt she reads comments. Oh well if she does. I won’t feel bad about honesty and people in this world need to be informed of this silent pandemic that’s more out of control then anything in my opinion because mental health is so difficult to treat and spreads(effects) the population more than anything I know about which is nothing about disease spreading. But my bipolar has touched more lives then my coughs and herpes combined by a long shot. Haha just joking about the herpes... I hope. Lolol
You worded that exactly how i word it lol im like yesss someone feels and experiences what i deal with really fucking knows what i deal with especially when u said normal ppl can get over anger in 5min for us certain triggers will cause rage and so much anger over shit that normal ppl wouldn't even blink an eye over my girl always gets so mad at me bc she will try and talk to me when im in that state of mind then get pissed again bc im still pissed over the original pisser offer lol its a never ending cycle and i wanna be alone but she makes me feel obligated to be with her after i tell her time and time again i hate relationships im not good in them she expects too much out of me its simple shit but i cant provide that when im in my low stages and you also talk about 7 subjects within a sentence i thought it was drinking that caused that bc I've noticed ill be off the chain without alcohol talkive feel i can do all things then boom i wake up and i dont feel right not sick just animated or something idk not really sad but just feel so worthless like i just fuck every thing up and i need to take myself away from ppl so im not hateful or not myself but then everybody thinks im pissed at them when i go days and weeks on shut down mode ive tried meds but i dont agree with them i just need my weed to keep me calm and im good lol
I don’t know about the coffee suggestion. It’s just going to make things worse. Since I’m bipolar, I can tell you coffee creates anxiety and anxiety bring about lots of other negative symptoms. It won’t help. Gum, a quiet walk or a cold non caffeinated drink may help. Maybe leave out talking.
I really enjoy and appreciate the Polar Warriors videos. My self isolation, and additional bipolar symptoms, have been pretty rough the past several months. But I always get a sense of hope from these videos, so thank you Rob
My friend asks once per week but I love how they ask. Instead of being the typical straight forward "have I taken my meds?", it's "how are the meds making you feel?" It reminds me that my friend cares about how I feel and my friend gets a much better response.
I love that question “How do the meds make you feel” it’s so nonjudgmental! I am newly BPD II diagnosed (2yrs) and my sister also has BPD since adolescence and I get it so much more now! This is a great question when I speak with her. Thanks for sharing!
If you have bipolar or another personality disorder, you have an obligation to discuss your challenges with many you interact with regularly. These can come across as having a bad attitude, self-control issues, etc. By helping others understand and how to be of help, the better it is for everyone and misunderstandings avoided. That might sound mean. It’s not intended to. By sharing perspectives and gaining understanding, our interactions improve and conflict is minimized.
thank you so much. when my partner is symptomatic ive taken it very personally in the past--even to the point of seperation because i felt it belittled my worth. i am learning even if he blames me during an episode, i can be supportive and learn to accept what he is feeling. he is finally open to getting a diagnosis, which i hope to be a great turning point for the better.
My DH was diagnosed last summer, and realizing that it's not really him when he's symptomatic has not only been a relief in some ways, it's also been heartbreaking to know that I didn't have to take it all seriously. All the years, all the angst I experienced... if I had known, I could have avoided most of that pain.
you are so helpful for me you really help me to deal with my husband through his bipolar episodes i clearly noticed that i was doing the wrong thing and your videos in general made me improve the way i talk to him and what i should and shouldnt do thanks a lot!
thank you for this! 💘 my partner has bipolar disorder, and i've been looking at your channel to understand how to be a better partner and to be more helpful. i love them so much, and i just want to do right by them.
I have had bipolar for 20 years. Just last year I was put into hospital involuntary sectioned for the first time the police an ambulance were called and after hospital I was diagnosed bipolar 1. I had a baby a 8 mth old at the time My manic state was amazing to start became very creative and was painting alot but soon turned very dark. We were in the middle of covid restrictions and masks made me very paranoid and I thought people were trying to kidnap my children because I couldn't see their faces. The darker parts I never talk about with anyone. They aren't nice things to talk about. It was a very tough time for me and my family. My partner visited me in hospital every day. He was very supportive. I am on medication first time in 10 years. I was fairly stable for a very long time. I am dedicated to staying well and taking them regularly. The hospital stay was a wake up call to take my diagnosis seriously. I have a great support system and have a plan in place in case of relapse thanks to my psychologist. Hope everyone is doing well. The tough times soon fade away.
I like the way you put words with your feeling to it. I have bipolar, and your emphathy words just made me want to cry. Thank you for such a gentlement
One of the best videos you’ve put out, then again I seem to walk away from so many of them feeling the same way. In a nutshell, “That is so good to hear!” or “That is so spot on!” I learn, I laugh, I empathize and cry. All very good emotions as far as I’m concerned! Naturally, sitting on the other side of a screen within a RUclips channel we can’t all know one another personally. However, if I may be so bold as to call you friend it would afford me the privilege to simply say, thank you my friend for what you do. May you receive as many blessings in return. Stay healthy out there.
Thank you for all your thougts and suggestions. I can say no matter what, I take everything personal and have learned so much from your videos. Much appreciated.
If your loved one is open to it. Hugs and touch can help. For me that is what works. I feel like I am not alone and they will stay with me through this.
I work with clients that have wide range of mental disorders like bipolar this helped me work with my clients and understanding ways to approach their triggers. It's is frustrating at times that I can't always helped them and unfortunately take it out on my or other staff members, but this video gave me some relief because I thought once I felt like I caught a connection with my clients the next day it was back to square one and it's normal. Now I better understand ways to approach my clients! So I'm very thankful for this video! 💕
Thank YOU! For all the videos that made me both calm and sometimes worried. I see this illness like strong emotionally reactions to things, events and situations exactly like almost everyone else but much stronger and more easy to feel stress than others. Which I can recognize myself!
Thank you so much! I’ve found that I naturally do the majority of these with my partner but there are some great ones that I will definitely incorporate into my vocabulary! When she told me she had Bipolar Disorder I knew I had to inform my self to better grasp what she’s going through, although I’ll never fully understand exactly what’s she’s feeling your videos help my understanding of what she’s dealing with. Thank you so much for making videos like this!
Just stay nearby so they know you are there for them. They will talk when they are ready. I know it is difficult to not have an action to help them, but they will appreciate that you are there for them.
I would personally like to take a moment to thank you so so much for having this channel with all the amazing videos. Filled quite a few pages by writing down thins you give as tips and tricks to use. Have a girlfriend who struggles with bipolar disorder and I could tell I wasnt very helpful and making things worse. Glad to have come across this channel, keep up the good work sir!
Thank you so much for your kind comment. I'm so glad that Rob's channel has been so helpful to you. If you'd like to help support Rob in what he does with Polar Warriors I'd encourage you to consider joining him on Patreon. He posts exclusive content there and is able to reply to direct messages through that platform. There is also a wonderful little support community in the community section. I'll include the link so you can check it out! I hope you're having a wonderful week so far! :) -Rachel (Polar Warriors team member) www.Patreon.com/PolarWarriors
Certainly - a good point. I do believe, the positive approach is right in most cases and some of the examples you cited helps in understanding further. Thank you. Keep going.
Thank you so much Rob. Quite honestly, I wonder sometimes if I really do have bipolar disorder, or if I am a victim of a lot of narcisstic abuse from my dad, along with having a mother who enables him.
I posted on one of your videos Rob awhile ago concerned with myself having bipolar disorder I was given a BPD diagnosis and accepted this for awhile Just received a call from my psychiatrist and he now wants to work towards treating bipolar I’m relieved but also gutted
I have tried to see if he would watch you,but no luck. We him is Finally at a point he is going to talk to a psychiatrist, also with the help of his probation officer. She told him in a cool way ...lol well listen if they tell you have to take medication well you have to do it or else you are going to jail. So AMEN TO THAT.....AGAIN MUCH LOVE TO YOU!!!!
I feel obligated to be successful in school and afraid to let parents know that I’m struggling to stay caught up and it’s so incredibly difficult to get out of bed and go to classes. I’m in college and I’m supposed to be doing well. But I’m not. And I have to wait a couple months to see a psychiatrist. And I really don’t even know what to do at all. School just feels unmanageable.
Hi, thanks for reaching out. The best way to talk to Rob directly is through Patreon. He responds to direct messages only on that platform. If you are already a Patron, just cut and paste what you wrote into a message and put the recipient as Polar Warriors and that is Rob exclusively. In many places, perhaps your school where there are mental health communities and you should do a little digging and find out if there is something in your area. It can be a help line, support groups, organizations, clinics etc. It doesn't even have to be specific for Bipolar, any mental health resources for disabilities, depression, women's groups, LGBTQ*, really search. Consider not just joining but perhaps volunteering as well. Peer support is so important. If you need to talk to someone immediately, www.crisistextline.org/ teenlineonline.org/talk-now/ Dianna Polar Warriors Team Member (H)old (O)n (P)ain (E)nds Rob: I really need your help to keep a good thing going here... PLEASE consider supporting Polar Warriors work on Patreon. Even just $1 a month makes a huge difference. Thank you so much
Hi, Rob offers one on one support on Patreon if you are interested. He also posts more personal information about his day to day struggles like his recent hospital stay. Until September 15th, he is offering free phone calls to patrons. Another Patreon exclusive is Rob hosting and moderating weekly support groups on discord! Take gentle care! 🙏 Sometimes we all need someone to talk to: www.crisistextline.org/ teenlineonline.org/talk-now/ Dianna Polar Warriors Team Member (H)old (O)n (P)ain (E)nds www.patreon.com/PolarWarriors
Thank you so much for this video! These 10 things to say work for a lot of life's situations (when a friend is grieving a loss, etc). Most importantly, these 10 things to say are positive. Often, depression, anxiety, etc., feels so negative that it's hard to remember that there will come a stable time again.
i have bipolar and me and my 79 year old dad i live withe are struggling. when i am in a negative space he tells me you did good all day and now you are going to ruin it or he will say cut it out. I end up hating him and harboring a strong resentment. he and i have watched all your videos and he tells me he will do better but he says you need to not be so quick to react . I just came down off a 2 week depression phase, it was hell. Feeling stuck right now but i see my meds doctor next week to try something to help with my depression. I feel bad for thinking this but someday when my dad is gone i beleive i will be happier and i will live by myself which is what i prefer and will make my dream of being a self employed small engine mechanic a reality with my older brother. I do love my dad and i do not mean to crap all over him, he has been there for me since i was little and am now 47, thank you for your excellent videos.
Hey there Matthew! Rob is available on patreon. You can message him, text or even have a call with him there. For a very limited time he is offering free support phone calls for all patrons right now in which he can lend an ear, give advice or answer questions. Take gentle care. Sometimes we all need someone to talk to: www.crisistextline.org/ teenlineonline.org/talk-now/ Dianna Polar Warriors Team Member (H)old (O)n (P)ain (E)nds On Patreon, you can message Rob directly, get a phone/video call, watch videos that are more personal in nature, and access a great community. www.patreon.com/PolarWarriors
I'm estranged from my 15 year old bipolar son. He's living with his mom and won't communicate with me as he doesn't feel that I was supported or understanding. He will not answer my call, texts, or letters. I don't blame him. I didn't understand what he was going through nor how to communicate with him the right way. I know seek to understand and work on myself so I can help him in the future. How can I rebuild and relationship with him and make amends from a distance?
I wish I found these videos months ago when the person that I love the most was consistently in my life. I feel like I failed her. These videos do give me clarity and peace though. They give me hope that if and when she contacts me again, I’ll actually be prepared and more mindful as to what to say/do and that no matter the outcome, I did my best🕊
Watching this video, I'm wondering how many of these things my mom says to me. I can't even imagine how hard it's been for them. Subscribed btw. Would just like to not feel so alone.Especially during this pandemic. I had to let my friends go because they were not healthy for me. So I've just had no friends except my friend in Miami
Sometimes there isn't much, if anything, someone can do or say to me to make me feel better. But, that doesn't mean I don't pull all the kind words of encouragement from years ago out from the back of my mind when I'm on the edge of breaking and there's simply no more fighting I can do anymore. Sometimes those kind words keep me alive, and that's all that I need. I also like how you mentioned that our suffering is unique to each individual. And that sometimes, it's easier for me to just go alone into the night and face my demons alone, than it is for me to enlist the help of others when they have no idea how to deal with them, when I do. So I don't ask for people to "join in the fight with me" but I ask for people to encourage me from the sidelines, and give me advice.
I would love my husband to watch this …. And here is the catch …. He would be offended that i accuse him of having this disorder. He doesn’t even like using the word DISORDER. I am really blessed to have stumbled on here. 1st REAL look at this.
This sounds like you're talking about someone who gets depressed a lot. I have a family member with Bipolar 1 and she is angry, negative, mean, and abusive to people all the time. She goes way out of her way to help people, but she also goes way out of her way to be mean. As a result, most of the family keeps their distance from her. She doesn't get why so many people won't answer the phone when she calls. She refuses to take her meds. Can you do a video on how to deal with someone like that? Most people say to cut someone off who is toxic, but I think that's a cold way to treat a family member.
Please someone help me. Tell me what to do. My son LOVES his mania and psychosis because then he becomes “God”. He’s had 7 hospitalisations for 3 to 5 weeks each time. When the high starts to come, he runs with it and eventually does really crazy stuff when he becomes psychotic. He’s lost 3 jobs. He’s 38. I’m 64. I’m worried that he won’t ever believe the diagnosis and will end up on the street, homeless, talking to himself after I’m gone.
What I do with my loved ones that seemed to work- Going for a walk in the sunlight and playing the senses game: 5-things we can see, 4-we can hear, 3-things we can feel, 2-we can taste.
I was in a mixed state and was hiding in the corner of my closet. My husband came in and asked how I was. I said, "I feel small." My husband sat down next to me and asked, "Can I be small with you?"...I never felt so understood.
I wish i had that n
You are blessed for having a husband like that.
You hooked a rare one
Thank you so much for making these videos. :)
My partner does little things like this too and I hope to god that I don't mess it up because I love him so much. I don't think I will mess it up though, I care far too much to let that happen!
I'm so glad to have found this community...maybe there is hope for me dealing with my husband....sometimes I feel so helpless and lost what to do or say. I almost lost him this weekend in more ways than one. I'm going to watch more of your videos and maybe feel better equipped...I think I do ok...its been 15 years and he's still alive and with me💜
Thank you so much for the kind words and I’m glad that you found our community here. It sure feels good to not be so alone dealing with these kinds of things. There is a lot of really good information here. Close to 100 videos available.
There’s another great resource I’d like to share, a book, called “loving someone with bipolar disorder” by Julie Fast. It’s fantastic for relationships.
If you would ever like to connect or have any questions, there is a link in my video descriptions where you can join our Patreon community, whilst supporting my advocacy work.
-Rob
Thanks so much for acknowledging our deep daily distress and our ability to put one foot forward each day, hour, minute, despite how we feel. Celebrate each triumph, no matter how small it may seem. BP warrior.
Thank you for your videos :)
Thank you Rob you always give awesome information! Hopeful is a word I would use to describe your messages! You are a 🦸♂️!!!!🧡
thank you brother
It’s seldom outright said, but the general attitude many members of my family took with regard to our differing religious and political views was, “You are manic, therefore you are wrong.” They basically used it as an excuse to dismiss me. The “flight of ideas” thing does happen to me a lot during mania, but that doesn’t make them bad ideas. It’s just that there are too many to keep up with.
Hey there ! Rob is available on patreon. You can message him, text or even have a call with him there. For a very limited time he is offering free support phone calls for all patrons right now in which he can lend an ear, give advice or answer questions. Take gentle care.
Sometimes we all need someone to talk to:
www.crisistextline.org/
teenlineonline.org/talk-now/
Dianna Polar Warriors Team Member
(H)old (O)n (P)ain (E)nds
On Patreon, you can message Rob directly, get a phone/video call, watch videos that are more personal in nature, and access a great community.
www.patreon.com/PolarWarriors
So I have been with woman two years she has bipolar disorder I never know where I stand with her she never talks about her feelings anymore I have thought about leaving but I love her very much and she has said she dosent want me to go are there any videos books or classes I can take to understand her better anything specifically about how best to love and support a person with this condition
Hi, thanks for reaching out. The best way to talk to Rob directly is through Patreon. He responds to direct messages only on that platform. If you are already a Patron, just cut and paste what you wrote into a message and put the recipient as Polar Warriors and that is Rob exclusively. Take care!
Dianna Polar Warriors Team Member
(H)old (O)n (P)ain (E)nds
Rob:
I really need your help to keep a good thing going here... PLEASE consider supporting Polar Warriors work on Patreon. Even just $1 a month makes a huge difference. Thank you so much
Been diagnosed nearly 15 years here. Something I’ve learned and would like to add: sometimes, a person who is struggling with mood may not be able to make decisions when asked small questions like “what do you want to eat?” Or even “are you hungry?” Or “do you want to go for a walk?” Its helpful for me when my loved ones just take over those little decisions, saying things like “let’s go for a walk together” or simply putting food in front of me when they’re eating as well. Sometimes making small, simple choices like what to eat when I’m very unwell is just difficult, and it helps to have someone step in like that.
Very good point Vic! I knew someone at my support group and her friends would drop off coffee and her mom would visit and do the dishes for her if she was depressed. The key is to communicate with our loved ones what works when we are feeling well so that they know when the time comes.
Dianna Polar Warriors Team Member
(H)old (O)n (P)ain (E)nds
Rob:
I really need your help to keep a good thing going here... PLEASE consider supporting Polar Warriors work on Patreon. Even just $1 a month makes a huge difference. Thank you so much
Agree to that one! Little decisions are sooo hard...sit still ruminating gets paralyzing, AA even says "Move a muscle, change a thought"...walking/eating healthy
@@healcptsd6467 Yes please write or make a call as you will feel better & your sister & brother in law will be glad you recognise & appreciate their efforts helping you. 🍪pocket.
I totally agree with your comment Vic Fleenor, having a friend or loved one step in & take over those little decisions can be so helpful. I've suffered with bipolar disorder since 18years of age, wasn't fully diagnosed til my early 30s. I'm now 58yrs old & managing quite well at times yet when I'm struggling with my mood, actions of others helping me out is more helpful then talking & asking me questions. My partner often asks me to go out on a walk, I often don't want to or have no motivation yet he says "come on you'll feel much better after some fresh air etc" Just by getting dressed & going for a walk with him helps me so much even if it's' a short walk. The food issue is hard for me, not being able to cook for myself it's so helpful to have a meal placed down in front of me when I'm very unwell too. Having a pet is something I've found helps me as I have something to love & care for. I have to get up in the morning to feed & see to my cat, which I've owned for almost 18years. 🍪pocket.
Take modafinil, well butrin and bromantane you feel much better in depression
At least you will feel 50% better
I do take them when depressed
Like today
Tomorrow i have to boost my self with bromantane
It works like magic
T3 800 to 1000mcg
Works well every day
Hello Rob. I have bipolar disorder and I'm a psychologist myself. Your videos are amazing and I'm glad that you are doing such a great thing. I'm a regular viewer of your channel and I always share your videos to my family and friends. But none of them watches them or takes measures for me. They are very supportive but not they way you describe in this channel. I majored in guidance and counselling. But even with my knowledge in psychology, I can't do this alone. I'm 28 years old and single. Just recovered from a nasty episode in which I almost killed myself. Your videos helped me recover much faster. Thank you so much for your amazing efforts :)
I'm so glad you didn't do it, the world is a brighter place with you in it. It's not your time friend, people need to hear your story. 🙏🏽
@@PolarWarriors thank you for your kind words. I really appreciate your time and effort even replying to my comment. Let's all work together and beat the stigma that exist about bipolar disorder :)
Hi! My psychiatrist thinks I may have BD, also I'm a clinical psychologist, it would be so helpfull if I ask you some questions. Could we chat or have a conversation? Please.
I am taking care of two BP, watching your videos all the time, they are very helpful! Thank you!
Thank you for sharing your story. Thank you Bipolar warrior for being the helping hand in time there's no one around a depressed girl or guy 😔
I had BD around 12 yrs old, love it hate it, it has become a long time friend. I studied psychology in hoping to overcome this by myself but realizing I can't. I felt so unworthy and untalented, I switched a lot and now working in elderly home. I always remember of the career path that I lelf. With my knowledge, I guide my family how to help me during my weak days. They just don't show interested, too much information, they don't have time, and always said religious thing would heal me. They blame me for not living a healthy lifestyle, just follow vegan, organic, detox, yoga all kinds of "healthy" lifestyle and I would be fine, just like them. I'm living in a foreign country now to escape the sad reality that my family make my situation worse.
This channel has become the family member I know I would never had. 😢 Someone to listen to and feeling not so alone.
Loved #10 the most. The idea that someone needs us, wants us in their life, even when we're symptomatic, goes a long way to counteract the false conviction the depression sells -- that everyone would be better off if we were gone.
Amen!
As someone who has loved another with bipolar and at times hasn't known what to say or do except just be there, it means a lot to know this actually does help.
Number 10 has saved my life more times than I can remember. It is powerful.
This is a constantle struggle with my daughter everytime she has an episode. It could be over something so small but to her it is the whole universe crashing on her.
My partner thinks I shouldn't be involved or even educate myself for fear of being controlled. Is that common? Should I just leave it n hope for the best?
What I'd like people to say to me: "No, I don't understand how you feel but I'm going to try to learn more about bipolar.".
When people tell me they did research or that they're going to, it makes me feel so loved and validated. It might sound silly but that is HUGE to me
@@MelissaHillikerNPets No it's not Silly at all. I try to get my husband to watch a video or read an article. He says he "Knows" how I feel but he doesn't. When I'm agitated he thinks I'm being mean. We've been married almost 24 years but I just don't feel understood by anyone. Even my medical Drs don't understand. I think my psychiatrist is the only one who understands. I just feel like a failure. I've been diagnosed since 2003. I've had depression most of my life. I think there shouldn't be any stigma but it's still bad. People don't recognize us as having an illness. They think Mental illness is different but it's not any different than for instance my asthma. Thanks for your comment. God bless you! 🙏🏻✝️😌
@@julesservantofjesus972 unfortunately people don't understand there is so much depth to disorders. "Small" things in communication can be explained by disorders but people don't understand that because they don't look into them. That unfortunately adds to the stigma :( praying for you and your husband!
@@MelissaHillikerNPets That's so true! Thanks so much for your prayers! Praying for you as well! I saw on your channel you have furbabies & love Chewy! 🐶🐶
We have 2 Shih Tzus & we are always ordering from Chewy! Hope you have a great week! 🙏🏻✝️🤗🙋🏼♀️
@@julesservantofjesus972 I am obsessed with my pets haha, and thanks you too!
Thank you Rob. So often I just want someone to be in the room with me. They don't have to say or do anything, I just don't want to be alone. I'm so glad you brought this up.
1. Give them permission to not be okay
2. What happened or what’s going right
3. You have every right to feel the way you feel
4. Don’t say anything
5. Validate feelings
6. Empathy (I don’t know but I can relate)
7. Find what works for them
8. Offer reassurance
9. Let the person know you believe them
10. Let the person know how important they are in your life
That's so wonderful Beatrix, thank you! 🤗🤗
Excellent, anything, but the dreaded, I know how you feel, or, let me tell you what happened to me growing up or at school etc."
Good summary! Thank you!
@@sherp2u1 EXACTLY!! That’s what I’ve been dealing with lately smh
I can't stand the whole, you have such great things going for you, why are you sad?
Great, just throw some shame a guilt on top.
Hello everyone, I'm here to educate myself. Someone very dear loved one is suffering and doesn't realize something is wrong. So 😭
Me too. The hardest thing I have ever dealt with. Best of luck to you. It has helped me a lot to join support groups as well.
I have it and my dad tries to derail the conversation and tells me something positive like how beautiful my kids are and what a beautiful soul I have and that he loves me no matter what and he is never going to leave me ever My mood calms down and I'm up lifted
Watching these bipolar videos breaks my heart. I think my daughter (15) has it and I don't think I've been very helpful. I hate that I may have been making it very hard for her....so sad and angry at myself. I am watching any video and reading anything I can to learn about how to help her. Also, I read the comments so I can hear from people who have it and maybe learn from them too. Thank you so very much for all the information I'm getting so I can help my daughter.
You're doing better than my mum ever did. Instead of helping me calm down when I was angry, she'd get insulted and get even more mad and say things that did nothing but provoke me even further until I was screaming at her. Then she'd blame shift and make me look like a raving lunatic while claiming she was the victim who did nothing wrong. I can't tell you how many times I wanted to kill myself because of her.
The mother of my child is bipolar and it feels like 1 week of the month shes happy and the rest of the time she is miserable and so negative it breaks me down mentally. I'm so worried my daughter will grow up with it too and I debate if it's worth staying together.
Love that you take the time to make these videos! ❤️
So grateful for these suggestions. They’re incredibly helpful. As someone with a loved one who has BP, I want you to know that the information you provide in these videos has made it possible for me to improve how I communicate with my loved one, to avoid taking so many things personally, and to have the courage to set boundaries, which has made all the difference in our relationship. Thank you, Rob, for your invaluable work. In all sincerity, you make a huge difference in the lives of those with BP and in the lives of people like me, their loved ones. 🙏🏼
Thanks for posting this. I was one who asked a year ago what would be the best 10 things to say rather than not to say on your video.
Back then, I had so much time and patience for the love of my life with Bi-polar. Slowly but surely her actions have killed virtually all that love. She has used and abused. I tried. My friends all said walk away from day 1. I still haven't completely but I know it's too toxic and draining. Every man in this woman's life has turned and walked away. I was determined not to be one of them. I've all but failed.
All the best to you Rob.
💕
Yes, the depression isn’t the hardest part to deal with for me. The untrue narratives they believe, repeat over and over, and attribute to God really irk me. Also the unreasonable anger (anger dysphoria) and the justification of those anger outbursts that occur during mania is much harder for me to deal with than the depression. I love listening to Polar Warriors because he takes responsibility for his own behavior rather than denying it, justifying it by spiritualizing the situation or by blaming someone else. He allows others to give him feedback about his irrational thoughts and tries to adjust, unlike my BP relationships. Maybe those I am dealing with are both BP and narcissists?
@@dahrunriver2924 yes I know what you mean. The diagnosed bi polar woman I was with had the most narcissistic personality possible and whilst I could see the bi polar symptoms in the background it was ultimately the narcissistic abuse that killed me and my love for her. Rob's ownership of his condition, his openness to be a better person and to heal himself is a sign of great character. Thanks for sharing Dahrun. Your shoulders are broader than mine. Best wishes.
Stuart Bible Thanks for the compliment but I still have a long road ahead. I read a lot of Dr George Simon’s work when dealing with the narcissistic tactics. At first it was overwhelming but I am slowly learning how to set boundaries with them.
@@stuart4679 j
Thanks for these positive tips. I’m Bipolar II & retired so I’ve been through lots of up & down symptomatic episodes. I live alone but have lots of rescue animals I care for. Sometimes my special dog & cat friends can help me when I’m depressed. They sense my moods & are always there to snuggle when I get into a depressive sleep phase. If I hadn’t had the animals to take care of, I seriously doubt I’d be here today. So I think a purpose or mission can help.
Pets really Do better than people..I talk to them.
I totally agree with you! They KNOW! I also have Bipolar 2. God bless Y'all. 🙏🏻✝️🙋🏼♀️🐶🐶
I have my animals also and because of them I fight hard because no one will love them like me and one they put to sleep being he is a pit bull but a gentle one...I am thankful for him especially
Very cliche, but just talking to a loved one is always helpful.
Hope everyone is hanging in there. Xx
Daaaaaang... Someone hit the "dislike" button before they could have even watched it. Can't please everyone. Love ya Rob!
There are bots that do that... It's ridiculous, but what can we do? 🤷
Maybe they are in the downswing of bipolar 🤷♀️
With literally HUNDREDS of likes, this says more about them than the video ;)
Only 0,7% dislikes though. That's extremely low for a RUclips video. Not many that can beat that.
Literally changed my life
My husband is great about saying the right thing to show that he cares. Instead of saying 'you should feel good about..' he says 'how does that make you feel?' Or 'how do you feel about that?'. The right words can make a huge difference. Thanks Rob. 🙂
"It's ok to feel like that. I'm here for you. I can't imagine how it feels."
Don't ask "what's wrong?" Ask "What happened?"
"You have every right to feel that way."
(Don't say anything) Just be quiet. Leave the room. Give them a hug. Give them a cup of coffee.
Don't compare suffering. Offer them company. Be there for them. Validate the way they feel.
Empathy: "I can relate to how you feel."
Figure out what works for them. ---> "What helps you the most? What works for you?"
Offer assurance----> "You aren't alone. This too shall pass."
Let them know you believe them. "I believe you." (this is validating)
Let them know how important they are to you. "I'm glad you have not given up. I need you in my life."
That's amazing, thank you so much Roxi 🙏❤️❤️
This was so helpful. It's like you were talking about my son and I and the issues I am having with him. I love him so much but feel like I'm at the end of my rope. There is nothing more I can do to help him and he won't help himself. This video has given me strength to not give up on him and not to take what he says and does so personally eventhough it really does hurt. I'm going to keep trying to approach him about seeking help. I also will have to stand firm to my boundaries for his sake. This illness has torn our family apart but I won't abandon him. I'm all he has left and I love him.
Valerie Reedmartin I think this video might be helpful too! You are not alone 🤗: ruclips.net/video/GyI7ofl3Z74/видео.html
Thank you so much for this. I’ve had such a hard time talking to my daughter for years about her bipolar disorder. She refuses to take meds. This makes communicating with her close to impossible but I refuse to give up. Your vids are giving me some hope for a breakthrough.
I have a hard time my loved ones don’t understand bipolar. I’ve been very manic lately and my dr upped my medication. I told my partner I feel drugged and not well. He has a physical sickness and said he was the unwell one. If I’m super upset I self harm but I’ve really been trying to get past that. It’s funny I usually feel depressed but i felt really good lately not knowing I was manic. I thought wow I finally feel happy. I hope everyone is having a good day !
Check out truehope empower, seems like it has helped many!
I've been diagnosed with Type 1 since I was 11, I just turned 21 and being in my first almost successful relationship with anyone in my entire life other than my father, who is also severely bipolar, I've finally decided to try learning about what it is that puts me off kilter. I hope you understand how important this is, thank you for doing this with your life.
It's weird how I realized I have no idea how to deal with a depressed person even though I've been having it for ten years. I was pleasantly surprised that #4 was on the list. It does seem to work! Everybody is different, some need space, some need company, sometimes it's both at different times.
Stay strong!
Maybe try to call to someone relative or psychologist?
It’s important with 10, not to use the words I’m glad you haven’t committed suicide. Stay with words like he was saying .. I’m glad you’re in my life, that you don’t give up, that you try your hardest, etc. using “suicide” can trigger ideations
I'm complicated. If I'm depressive, I prefer that someone straight up ask if I'm having suicidal thoughts because it kind of wakes up my brain to help me admit my thoughts.
If I'm manic, I would rather I be asked am I having any negative thoughts because I don't comprehend sadness during my mania. Suicide results in a "well I am now" reaction. Negative thoughts reminds me to explore the pessimistic side of my blind optimism.
On point 1 just permission to feel the way they do.. reminds me of the most powerful words a Dutch famous person told my mother the same day I went to her to take care of her dog while she was getting ready to be hospitalised for chronic issues and giving up. "Every emotion is a good emotion" basically so long as you feel something you're alive and there's hope. I ended up making a bird with a scroll with those words with 3d pen that she keeps in her living room to remind her no matter how much her physical and brain problems (lot of forgetfulness as if dementia after head surgery to remove large menigioma) . No matter if bipolar or other I feel that no one should be judged for the way they feel. Great video all around! Thank you for putting this up here
In my algebra class my teacher called on me and I just felt like I couldn’t say anything for an answer, and later in the classroom my teacher comes up to me and says sorry if I was uncomfortable being called on and I told her I was fine just my brain doing tricks. And she seemed to understand me and respectful about me and my mental issues for how they affect me and not think I am doing things on purpose.
Personally, I have Bipolar II, which generally shows itself as depression, if anything. Even with that experience, it's still really hard to know exactly what to say. Sometimes I'll find myself unintentionally insensitive. Thanks for the video to guide me!
I loved your analogy with the eggs. people in my life have literally said that to me. reality evaporates on me when I'm symptomatic... nothing said to me usually helps, but acts of kindness do. like the coffee you mentioned, or dropping off homemade cookies at my door with a note that just says' thinking of you'... I need space as I wrestle with everything going on in my head. but these random acts of kindness indirectly letting me know they care... as you mentioned, it might not look like it helps right away, but it can make all the difference in the world.
Great comment, thank you friend!
I'm glad I watched this. Concerning #10, someone close to me who has been diagnosed with BPD opened up to me recently about suicidal feelings they've had over the years, and it broke my heart to think of losing them but I didn't know how I should frame that sentiment to them without making it sound like I was centering the discussion around myself, and I didn't know how to make it sound like I wasn't saying their life's value was in any way proportionate to how they impact me personally. I wish I had seen this video before that conversation, but I will definitely keep this entire video in mind when having these sorts of discussions in future.
Anyone else have trouble keeping up with just daily task? I just can’t seem to stay on top of daily life. Idk if I am just lazy or systematic. Do you have any videos about that? I am going to check in your list to see. Thank you for all you do!
I believe All of society is having that issue right now and that's great for them but for those of us who have been having that issue for a long time and now it's even exacerbated more I just don't know what to do. It happens to me too but clearly is worse now. I just try to do 1 thing... Then maybe another. I hope this stops for you, it sucks bad.
Emily I agree right now most of my energy goes to work and my seven year old. I am a single mom to top it all off. Lol I am glad to hear it isn’t just me. I was really beating myself up over it.
I cant even feed myself at times no less clean my house.
de marullo well, this is where I am at, I just don’t have any energy to keep up the housework. I look around and say I have to get this done, yet that is as far as it gets then next thing I know I am falling asleep.
You are not alone...I am in a mixed cycle, start stop start stop, nothing finished (and if I Do finish, I don't "Care"- ugh)...This channel is Amazing, I send it to my therapist and she shares it with other bps
i have borderline personality disorder and my partner is bipolar i love these videos because i am so in the dark with what to do and sometimes the emotions tend to clash with my bpd, thank you for the help you provide. im sure it has saved lives.
Thank you for using phrases that are useful, especially right now.
Thanks for your many videos , I now know what happened in what I thought was a wonderful relationship some 20 years ago. The numerous episodes have churned in my head for over 17 years. This is such a devastating mental disorder, especially for a partner who is trying to figure it out. Without proper meds that should be accompanied by talk at least once a month let alone once a week preferably, there is no hope for a relationship to go on😢.
I'm glad to have found this channel, albeit late.
I'm bipolar II and its a struggle, besides my family dont understand what bipolar is.
I stopped all meds and occasionally take Valium for anxiety.
My hypomania is honestly worse (i'm self destructive)than my depressive state.
I'm glad to learn I'm not alone in this struggle.
Sometimes I feel like I should just, shutie uppie. Sending love your way. Now I have to watch it again, to take notes. Thanks
I so talk
Way too much
Its embarrassing
So i run away....im 62 and cant run anymore.yvonne ness
I just feel like I’m losing my stability right along with him. As he swings I find myself swinging with him and I don’t even have BPD... 😭
Oh god...I just stumbled on this video looking for something to help me with my husband. We've been together for 15 years now and it's getting worse. So bad this weekend I felt I was losing the battle as well...I feel like I have PTSD sometimes when he has his episodes. He hasn't been diagnosed, but you know. ..I am so glad I'm not alone💜
11 years with my SO and he's recently diagnosed BP and i know i have depression issues. I feel like i fail every single day at everything i try to do for our family
@@mamakfamily9576 you aren't failing!! Keep trying to focus on the good things. You have made it this far and now with a diagnosis you can work together!
This is my first time here, how interesting this is, I have been dealing with a child who only now has been diagnosed , listening and learning is something I want to learn about as she is 18, and I now am the full time career of her baby, of 5 months . This illness is so hard to understand, but now hearing from you about the do’s and donts helps me out in so many ways. So I’m still learning to understand what she is going thru for your perspective, and I’m willing to do anything to help her , she is 1 of 8 . So thank you 🙏 for your insights to this illness. I still have a long way to go. Learning that is…. Sydney, Australia 🇦🇺
Hi Rob, what do you do if no one can figure out if im bipolar 2 or somewhere along the spectrum or if its unipolar? I consulted 12 Psychiatrists over the years and always get a different answer. Im stuck in depression for years.
I have been recently diagnosed Bipolar 2. I am so suprised at how accurate some of what you say applies to mr.
I love the expression you use that your loved one may be "temporarily unavailable" it puts so much into perspective when you think of it that way. The words reiterate that the episode is temporary and will pass we just have to be patient with them and we can't expect them to be available in the way we know them to be when they aren't experiencing an episode. Thank you for that language.💕
Hi Heidi! Thank you so much for the kind words. Do you stop by the channel again sometime :-)
-Rob
And again a excellent video without a single cut in it. You are putting the bar high for yourself ;-) I found point 10 a good one. But on the other hand something I struggle with is hearing how important I am for my family. It makes me feel pressured and often guilty for not ''being there'' so often. It makes me feel better when they say they manage fine without me. Or when I see they have a great time without me as well as with me. I don't know if you can relate to that. I would only say that kind of thing when someone is really going towards suicidal. The only reason I am still alive is because I know how much it would hurt my family and specially my children if I would do it. But (in my case) someone doesn't need to tell me that. I could figure that out by myself. But maybe that's not so easy for others. I don't know. It's different for everyone.
About to send this video to my mom. Sent me into a pissed mania yesterday while I was kinda happy and optimistic about my future. But like always she told me how to feel, to stop overthinking, and if you did this months ago you wouldn’t be dealing with this now. Well I’m dealing with it now and trying to fix it but thanks for reminding about what I didn’t do that I’ve felt guilty as fuck for longer then most people feel guilty ever in their life. And also reminding me that I wasn’t doing what I should at the time because I was busy living the great life of sleeping 12-18 hours a day and not talking to anyone for weeks. So fucking annoying. I’ve tried and tried to explain it to her and show her your videos and she temporarily reacts positively but a few months later it’s back to the start. Damn. It’s like guys yelling at a girl for her period and she explains and he’s fine for a month and starting all over again. So like always I said I don’t choose this but go yell at a blind guy and tell him how to feel since he chooses it. Sadly though. I’m sure she still doesn’t get the point. She can more than likely relate to a blind person more then myself because it’s possible to play pretend blind from what I know. Not sure how someone plays my brain kinda sucks ass off and on. Maybe if they think of funerals and how they feel and think of their happiest times partying while younger and thinking of how all of that is a reasonable way of explaining my feelings but the most important part to understand that those extreme emotions the relate with are emotions that I also have but happen as easy as flipping a light switch. They get the just of most of it. But she has no idea that her 1 min of talking was a light switch that sent me into an emotional feeling of being like my best friend just was hospitalized from getting jumped by a guy I know and put him in a coma. So I have a lot of anger while adrenaline to go defend and stick up for my friends suffering with some worry and anxiety sprinkled in. I could care less what almost all people think and say to me. But loved one just don’t understand that their words are like playing Russian emotional roulette. So tired of being irritated as shit for hours and days by people I love that most likely forgot what they said 5 mins within me leaving their house and going on with their daily routine while I leave struggling to not drive and get a bottle of vodka, drive 100mph for the anger rush, go gamble, go buy some pot, find some pills to abuse, and so on. All sounds stupid as shit to a normal mentally healthy person. But if people are like me when it comes to my bipolar. Those options I already know for a fact sound wayyyy better then going home like I did and still being pissed the next day and dealing with all of this while knowing a crash is coming with depression. So why not go get fucked up rather then spend another min of my life feeling this hell for the countless number of times. But I know now that it’s just worse with the choice of drugs and so on. But people should be aware that many people abuse stuff out of only trying to not hate life and it’s hard to judge a person for trying to escape hell. Wish the world realized that way the powerful that I’m assuming know this would stop using us to profit from us doing all the work to make them money from our mental illnesses. Hey let’s put someone in a cage because the hate their life and feel like dying. Even better let’s do it to the point of maximum capacity with a vast majority feeling relatable feelings. Super fucking idea on how to rehabilitate a person. Maybe put a lion, tiger, bear, crocodile, wolves, and some bunnies in a cage to make friends because they were isolated and acting odd for their species. Pretty much will go as good as putting mentally ill in prison. Just my opinion and way of saying with a very reasonable analogy that’s so easy to understand the point I’m trying to make that there’s no way that the powerful are assholes for the most part that use us and sadly our loved ones can’t grasp what they will never relate to anymore than I’ll know what giving birth feels like. No vagina so obviously I’m not knowing that feeling ever. Just like no fucked up mental issues then no clue of how we almost need to start making new words to specify what our happy/mania and depression is compared to everyone saying their feeling depressed because they have to work Saturday or whatever lol. No that’s called a bummer dude. And your happy about the day off isn’t like mania because I’m happy. Doubt they’ve ever been so happy they went to work smiling at the boss and said not today with a smile and quit, drove at 150mph on a highway to the casino and played poker for 24 hours while drinking crown and cokes without any stimulants other then the boring version of unhealthy coke from that sugar lol. Oh and I just remembered having fun at the poker table laughing and taking a drink that went down wrong and I coughed it up spitting my drink right in the face of a guy 15-20 years older than me and he looked like he had smiled 3 times in his life but killed as many things as leaves of camo on his outfit. Haha most awkward moment of feeling like that asshole I’ve ever experienced. Still funny but damn it got awkward at that table except for me drinking and manic. I was polite and apologized and bought the guy some drinks. But I would of shit myself if I was balanced and in my normal introverted mood. But yeah people should get that your happy isn’t mania. And I forgot I’m sending this video to my mom. Doubt she reads comments. Oh well if she does. I won’t feel bad about honesty and people in this world need to be informed of this silent pandemic that’s more out of control then anything in my opinion because mental health is so difficult to treat and spreads(effects) the population more than anything I know about which is nothing about disease spreading. But my bipolar has touched more lives then my coughs and herpes combined by a long shot. Haha just joking about the herpes... I hope. Lolol
You worded that exactly how i word it lol im like yesss someone feels and experiences what i deal with really fucking knows what i deal with especially when u said normal ppl can get over anger in 5min for us certain triggers will cause rage and so much anger over shit that normal ppl wouldn't even blink an eye over my girl always gets so mad at me bc she will try and talk to me when im in that state of mind then get pissed again bc im still pissed over the original pisser offer lol its a never ending cycle and i wanna be alone but she makes me feel obligated to be with her after i tell her time and time again i hate relationships im not good in them she expects too much out of me its simple shit but i cant provide that when im in my low stages and you also talk about 7 subjects within a sentence i thought it was drinking that caused that bc I've noticed ill be off the chain without alcohol talkive feel i can do all things then boom i wake up and i dont feel right not sick just animated or something idk not really sad but just feel so worthless like i just fuck every thing up and i need to take myself away from ppl so im not hateful or not myself but then everybody thinks im pissed at them when i go days and weeks on shut down mode ive tried meds but i dont agree with them i just need my weed to keep me calm and im good lol
I don’t know about the coffee suggestion. It’s just going to make things worse. Since I’m bipolar, I can tell you coffee creates anxiety and anxiety bring about lots of other negative symptoms. It won’t help. Gum, a quiet walk or a cold non caffeinated drink may help. Maybe leave out talking.
Yes, but also, decaffeinated coffee 👀
Thanks! I would also like a video that discusses what and what not to say to someone who is in denial and not treating their bipolar disorder.
When my loved one is manic and delusional, I try to understand the parts of the delusion that makes sense.I talk about those parts.
I really enjoy and appreciate the Polar Warriors videos. My self isolation, and additional bipolar symptoms, have been pretty rough the past several months. But I always get a sense of hope from these videos, so thank you Rob
Ohhh never ask if we have had our medication!!!! Raaahhhhhh lol
My friend asks once per week but I love how they ask.
Instead of being the typical straight forward "have I taken my meds?", it's "how are the meds making you feel?"
It reminds me that my friend cares about how I feel and my friend gets a much better response.
I love that question “How do the meds make you feel” it’s so nonjudgmental! I am newly BPD II diagnosed (2yrs) and my sister also has BPD since adolescence and I get it so much more now! This is a great question when I speak with her. Thanks for sharing!
If you have bipolar or another personality disorder, you have an obligation to discuss your challenges with many you interact with regularly. These can come across as having a bad attitude, self-control issues, etc. By helping others understand and how to be of help, the better it is for everyone and misunderstandings avoided. That might sound mean. It’s not intended to. By sharing perspectives and gaining understanding, our interactions improve and conflict is minimized.
thank you so much. when my partner is symptomatic ive taken it very personally in the past--even to the point of seperation because i felt it belittled my worth. i am learning even if he blames me during an episode, i can be supportive and learn to accept what he is feeling. he is finally open to getting a diagnosis, which i hope to be a great turning point for the better.
My DH was diagnosed last summer, and realizing that it's not really him when he's symptomatic has not only been a relief in some ways, it's also been heartbreaking to know that I didn't have to take it all seriously. All the years, all the angst I experienced... if I had known, I could have avoided most of that pain.
thanks for your videos. They are helping many people
you are so helpful for me you really help me to deal with my husband through his bipolar episodes i clearly noticed that i was doing the wrong thing and your videos in general made me improve the way i talk to him and what i should and shouldnt do thanks a lot!
thank you for this! 💘 my partner has bipolar disorder, and i've been looking at your channel to understand how to be a better partner and to be more helpful. i love them so much, and i just want to do right by them.
I have had bipolar for 20 years. Just last year I was put into hospital involuntary sectioned for the first time the police an ambulance were called and after hospital I was diagnosed bipolar 1. I had a baby a 8 mth old at the time My manic state was amazing to start became very creative and was painting alot but soon turned very dark. We were in the middle of covid restrictions and masks made me very paranoid and I thought people were trying to kidnap my children because I couldn't see their faces. The darker parts I never talk about with anyone. They aren't nice things to talk about. It was a very tough time for me and my family. My partner visited me in hospital every day. He was very supportive. I am on medication first time in 10 years. I was fairly stable for a very long time. I am dedicated to staying well and taking them regularly. The hospital stay was a wake up call to take my diagnosis seriously. I have a great support system and have a plan in place in case of relapse thanks to my psychologist. Hope everyone is doing well. The tough times soon fade away.
Thank you for sharing your experience. I hope you are doing OK.
I like the way you put words with your feeling to it. I have bipolar, and your emphathy words just made me want to cry. Thank you for such a gentlement
This ls so helpful for me to understand better to someone i care a lot.
One of the best videos you’ve put out, then again I seem to walk away from so many of them feeling the same way. In a nutshell, “That is so good to hear!” or “That is so spot on!” I learn, I laugh, I empathize and cry. All very good emotions as far as I’m concerned! Naturally, sitting on the other side of a screen within a RUclips channel we can’t all know one another personally. However, if I may be so bold as to call you friend it would afford me the privilege to simply say, thank you my friend for what you do. May you receive as many blessings in return. Stay healthy out there.
Thank you for all your thougts and suggestions. I can say no matter what, I take everything personal and have learned so much from your videos. Much appreciated.
If your loved one is open to it. Hugs and touch can help. For me that is what works. I feel like I am not alone and they will stay with me through this.
I work with clients that have wide range of mental disorders like bipolar this helped me work with my clients and understanding ways to approach their triggers. It's is frustrating at times that I can't always helped them and unfortunately take it out on my or other staff members, but this video gave me some relief because I thought once I felt like I caught a connection with my clients the next day it was back to square one and it's normal. Now I better understand ways to approach my clients! So I'm very thankful for this video! 💕
Thank you for your videos
Tank You! For EVERYTHING!
Thank YOU! For all the videos that made me both calm and sometimes worried. I see this illness like strong emotionally reactions to things, events and situations exactly like almost everyone else but much stronger and more easy to feel stress than others. Which I can recognize myself!
Thank you so much! I’ve found that I naturally do the majority of these with my partner but there are some great ones that I will definitely incorporate into my vocabulary! When she told me she had Bipolar Disorder I knew I had to inform my self to better grasp what she’s going through, although I’ll never fully understand exactly what’s she’s feeling your videos help my understanding of what she’s dealing with. Thank you so much for making videos like this!
What do you do when you have already done theses 10 suggestions and more and your partner refuses to talk and push you away?
Just stay nearby so they know you are there for them. They will talk when they are ready. I know it is difficult to not have an action to help them, but they will appreciate that you are there for them.
You leave them be...sometimes you need to be alone
I would personally like to take a moment to thank you so so much for having this channel with all the amazing videos.
Filled quite a few pages by writing down thins you give as tips and tricks to use.
Have a girlfriend who struggles with bipolar disorder and I could tell I wasnt very helpful and making things worse.
Glad to have come across this channel, keep up the good work sir!
Thank you so much for your kind comment. I'm so glad that Rob's channel has been so helpful to you. If you'd like to help support Rob in what he does with Polar Warriors I'd encourage you to consider joining him on Patreon. He posts exclusive content there and is able to reply to direct messages through that platform. There is also a wonderful little support community in the community section. I'll include the link so you can check it out! I hope you're having a wonderful week so far! :) -Rachel (Polar Warriors team member)
www.Patreon.com/PolarWarriors
Certainly - a good point. I do believe, the positive approach is right in most cases and some of the examples you cited helps in understanding further. Thank you. Keep going.
Thank you so much Rob. Quite honestly, I wonder sometimes if I really do have bipolar disorder, or if I am a victim of a lot of narcisstic abuse from my dad, along with having a mother who enables him.
I posted on one of your videos Rob awhile ago concerned with myself having bipolar disorder
I was given a BPD diagnosis and accepted this for awhile
Just received a call from my psychiatrist and he now wants to work towards treating bipolar
I’m relieved but also gutted
I am here for my daughter. I love your videos. I am learning more about it.
Wonderful 🙏🏽
The little voice over my head that I try to keep awake all the time mostly speaks to me that way. 🙂
You have helped me so much. Helping me with my son. I sincerely appreciate your videos. Thank you so much.
I have tried to see if he would watch you,but no luck. We him is Finally at a point he is going to talk to a psychiatrist, also with the help of his probation officer. She told him in a cool way ...lol well listen if they tell you have to take medication well you have to do it or else you are going to jail. So AMEN TO THAT.....AGAIN MUCH LOVE TO YOU!!!!
Your videos are so very helpful. Thank you for doing them!
GREAT VIDEO M8. My Gf recommended this channel to help me help her and its done wonders
I feel obligated to be successful in school and afraid to let parents know that I’m struggling to stay caught up and it’s so incredibly difficult to get out of bed and go to classes. I’m in college and I’m supposed to be doing well. But I’m not. And I have to wait a couple months to see a psychiatrist. And I really don’t even know what to do at all. School just feels unmanageable.
Hi, thanks for reaching out. The best way to talk to Rob directly is through Patreon. He responds to direct messages only on that platform. If you are already a Patron, just cut and paste what you wrote into a message and put the recipient as Polar Warriors and that is Rob exclusively.
In many places, perhaps your school where there are mental health communities and you should do a little digging and find out if there is something in your area. It can be a help line, support groups, organizations, clinics etc. It doesn't even have to be specific for Bipolar, any mental health resources for disabilities, depression, women's groups, LGBTQ*, really search. Consider not just joining but perhaps volunteering as well. Peer support is so important.
If you need to talk to someone immediately,
www.crisistextline.org/
teenlineonline.org/talk-now/
Dianna Polar Warriors Team Member
(H)old (O)n (P)ain (E)nds
Rob:
I really need your help to keep a good thing going here... PLEASE consider supporting Polar Warriors work on Patreon. Even just $1 a month makes a huge difference. Thank you so much
I’m so glad I found your channel. ❤
Hi, Rob offers one on one support on Patreon if you are interested. He also posts more personal information about his day to day struggles like his recent hospital stay. Until September 15th, he is offering free phone calls to patrons. Another Patreon exclusive is Rob hosting and moderating weekly support groups on discord! Take gentle care! 🙏
Sometimes we all need someone to talk to:
www.crisistextline.org/
teenlineonline.org/talk-now/
Dianna Polar Warriors Team Member
(H)old (O)n (P)ain (E)nds
www.patreon.com/PolarWarriors
You're looking very well at the moment, Rob, glad to see it. :)
Thank you so much for this video! These 10 things to say work for a lot of life's situations (when a friend is grieving a loss, etc). Most importantly, these 10 things to say are positive. Often, depression, anxiety, etc., feels so negative that it's hard to remember that there will come a stable time again.
I was just diagnosed bipolar w/manic episodes and major depression. I want to thank you for helping to understand me and to know that I’m not alone.
Bi-polar is hard, coping is draining. Being hurt emotional is numbing. It closes one off.
Thankyou for this very helpful video. Almost my whole family have a bipolar disorder its very challenging .Your words are very inspiring. ❤
I don't know why but for me if they leave the room during an argument I get even more angry.
How can I respond when they repeat the same story several times and every time we talk? Trying to help and learn. Thank you ❤️
i have bipolar and me and my 79 year old dad i live withe are struggling. when i am in a negative space he tells me you did good all day and now you are going to ruin it or he will say cut it out. I end up hating him and harboring a strong resentment. he and i have watched all your videos and he tells me he will do better but he says you need to not be so quick to react . I just came down off a 2 week depression phase, it was hell. Feeling stuck right now but i see my meds doctor next week to try something to help with my depression. I feel bad for thinking this but someday when my dad is gone i beleive i will be happier and i will live by myself which is what i prefer and will make my dream of being a self employed small engine mechanic a reality with my older brother. I do love my dad and i do not mean to crap all over him, he has been there for me since i was little and am now 47, thank you for your excellent videos.
Hey there Matthew! Rob is available on patreon. You can message him, text or even have a call with him there. For a very limited time he is offering free support phone calls for all patrons right now in which he can lend an ear, give advice or answer questions. Take gentle care.
Sometimes we all need someone to talk to:
www.crisistextline.org/
teenlineonline.org/talk-now/
Dianna Polar Warriors Team Member
(H)old (O)n (P)ain (E)nds
On Patreon, you can message Rob directly, get a phone/video call, watch videos that are more personal in nature, and access a great community.
www.patreon.com/PolarWarriors
will do. thank you for being there for us,
It's impressive that you can acknowledge the support you've received from your father despite the hurtful things he's said.
I'm estranged from my 15 year old bipolar son. He's living with his mom and won't communicate with me as he doesn't feel that I was supported or understanding. He will not answer my call, texts, or letters. I don't blame him. I didn't understand what he was going through nor how to communicate with him the right way. I know seek to understand and work on myself so I can help him in the future. How can I rebuild and relationship with him and make amends from a distance?
I wish I found these videos months ago when the person that I love the most was consistently in my life. I feel like I failed her. These videos do give me clarity and peace though. They give me hope that if and when she contacts me again, I’ll actually be prepared and more mindful as to what to say/do and that no matter the outcome, I did my best🕊
Watching this video, I'm wondering how many of these things my mom says to me. I can't even imagine how hard it's been for them. Subscribed btw. Would just like to not feel so alone.Especially during this pandemic. I had to let my friends go because they were not healthy for me. So I've just had no friends except my friend in Miami
Sometimes there isn't much, if anything, someone can do or say to me to make me feel better. But, that doesn't mean I don't pull all the kind words of encouragement from years ago out from the back of my mind when I'm on the edge of breaking and there's simply no more fighting I can do anymore.
Sometimes those kind words keep me alive, and that's all that I need.
I also like how you mentioned that our suffering is unique to each individual. And that sometimes, it's easier for me to just go alone into the night and face my demons alone, than it is for me to enlist the help of others when they have no idea how to deal with them, when I do. So I don't ask for people to "join in the fight with me" but I ask for people to encourage me from the sidelines, and give me advice.
I would love my husband to watch this …. And here is the catch …. He would be offended that i
accuse him of having this disorder. He doesn’t even like using the word DISORDER.
I am really blessed to have stumbled on here. 1st REAL look at this.
This sounds like you're talking about someone who gets depressed a lot. I have a family member with Bipolar 1 and she is angry, negative, mean, and abusive to people all the time. She goes way out of her way to help people, but she also goes way out of her way to be mean. As a result, most of the family keeps their distance from her. She doesn't get why so many people won't answer the phone when she calls. She refuses to take her meds. Can you do a video on how to deal with someone like that? Most people say to cut someone off who is toxic, but I think that's a cold way to treat a family member.
Basically living with bipolar family means they control what we can say or do 🚦it’s so challenging !!!!
Please someone help me. Tell me what to do. My son LOVES his mania and psychosis because then he becomes “God”. He’s had 7 hospitalisations for 3 to 5 weeks each time. When the high starts to come, he runs with it and eventually does really crazy stuff when he becomes psychotic. He’s lost 3 jobs. He’s 38. I’m 64. I’m worried that he won’t ever believe the diagnosis and will end up on the street, homeless, talking to himself after I’m gone.
watch this for my best friend ❤️
What I do with my loved ones that seemed to work- Going for a walk in the sunlight and playing the senses game: 5-things we can see, 4-we can hear, 3-things we can feel, 2-we can taste.