Dear Bosnian Ape Society, The yield you report from a 20,000kg compressed block of Uranium is rather low, at only about 226GJ or 54.01 tons of TNT. This suggests that prompt criticality has only barely been achieved, causing what is effectively a fizzle, rather than the significantly supercritical explosions which are a feature of most effective nuclear weapons. I would like to suggest some small improvements to the helpful instructions you have already laid out, which if properly applied should significantly increase yields to a level more appropriate for effective home defense. First we must analyze the proposal laid out by the video. In order for the solid cube you depict -- 101.5 cm on a side, judging by the density of Uranium -- to not already be critical, we may upper bound the isotopic composition using the geometric buckling of this cube as 3*(pi/101.5cm)^2, from which we determine the composition to contain significantly less than 15% U-235 and mostly U-238. This does have the benefit of being easier to obtain from existing nuclear supply chains, but as we will see this will also form one of the sources of the lackluster performance described in the tutorial. Now for some suggestions: 1. I would recommend starting with a hollow pit construction, which by lowering the effective density (and therefore increasing geometric buckling) will allow the usage of either more or a higher enrichment uranium, and more importantly also increase the ease of reshaping it into a more supercritical configuration. For beginners, a hollow prolate spheroid will be easiest to compress by two hands, and an aluminum pusher plate can also make easier the application of even pressure. 2. In preparation, the exercise of especially the pectoral muscles should be emphasized. Proper form and training goes a long way towards achieving maximum criticality. 3. Fusion boosting, by the injection of several milligrams of deuterium into the pit prior to compression, can help improve yields for those concerned about their performance. 4. Somewhat paradoxically, using a smaller amount of Uranium could improve yields here by minimizing the probability of a stray neutron initiating the chain reaction before significant supercriticality is achieved. The spontaneous fission rate of 20,000 kg of the isotopic composition inferred above produces at least 231,000 neutrons per second, giving an extremely small window for implosion to take place. In fact, I would judge this to be the likely reason for the fizzle described in the video. Using a smaller amount of a higher-grade Uranium will decrease the background neutron rate for two main reasons. First, and somewhat obviously, the spontaneous fission rate is proportional to the amount of material, so a smaller amount of material will lower the background neutron rate and give more time for compression to supercriticality. Second, and perhaps more surprisingly, U-235 actually has a far lower spontaneous fission rate than U-238, so these higher grades will also do even better on an equal-weight basis. 5. A polonium urchin, wrapped thinly in beryllium and gold, and placed at the center of the pit, can also help kick-start the reaction as soon as the pit is fully collapsed. Please let me know if you have any questions. With crime by Serbian home invaders on the rise, I am deeply cognizant of the need for home defense and am grateful to this channel for making such informative and high-quality tutorials freely available for the general public. It is my hope that my suggestions can also help those looking to protect their property and family from Serbian home invaders.
This was incredibly informative! Thank you! I had a gut feeling that I might not be getting a high enough yield, now I can rest easy knowing my home is properly protected.
I followed this tutorial down to every step, and it almost worked perfectly. The only problem I found is that there was a single seat, twin engine, supermanuverable Sukhoi Su-35 Flanker-E air-defence figther observing me the whole time. It didn't even consider me a threat because it was too busy laughing at my complete and utter incompetence
Describes my life perfectly I am currently on the run from the FBI and Mafia and I and watching this on a Samsung Smart fridge in an IKEA. I am quickly running out of ideas of where to hide, I already tried the ball pit in Chuck E Cheese but a child ratted me out. I must go, I hear footsteps coming
@SkepticDylan Oh ... I am new to this channel, so I thought it was a brand new video. I am glad it was restored. It's one of the ones that has a voice actor, which is better than TTS in my opinion.
Cringe alpha male: has a plan (is predictable if you know the plan) Based sigma male: makes up a plan as he executes that very plan (very effective against serbian home invaders)
"the voices sound familiar, but you cannot place.them" - I think the point here is that "you" is having a psychotic episode and family are trying to help him out
I absolutely LOVE the low quality, noisy, poorly adjusted domains, default settings, basic models, badly rotated particles, and unadjusted lighting in...whatever 3d software you are using. Looks like blender. I always try to aim for perfect photorealism, but this channel's videos have brought me above that.
what did i learn today about sweet baby ray's BBQ sauce: -burns hot enough to vaporize tungsten -if ingested, gives a (supposedly normal) person the capability of channeling the full force of a nuclear blast, essentially turning the subject into goku. did i miss anything?
I work at a grocery store, and every time I see a bottle of Sweet Baby Ray's come through the register, I can't help but think of this video. Thanks for the reupload.
Thank you very much Bonsian Ape Society. Your detailed tutorial for avoiding the home invasion tactically is effective both practically and mentally. You managed to save me, my wife and my four children from home invades of duolingo. I followed all these steps carefully and survived the situation but rest in piece my chill ketchup. Thanks for the tutorial you indeed saved those from the home invaders.
Next video should be “How to Save Your Wine Cellar From an Ohio Class Nuclear Submarine armed with 14 Trident SSBNs”. I need this in my life as I recently lost my 1857 Chateau d’Yquem to a Trident strike. Sad days.
“How to Save Your Wine Cellar From an Ohio Class Nuclear Submarine armed with 14 Trident SSBNs” Absolutely brilliant line. Definitly worth a video. Sorry to hear about your 1857 Chateau d’Yquem. All iv'e lost is my Tesco shopping cart. Didn't have enough ERA plates on it.
I feel you man. I also recently lost my hermit crabs from a nuclear trident missile launched from an ohio class submarine at exactly 3 AM in Eastern European Standard Time in my apartment complex, in the suburbs of Athens, while I was collecting my daily cat hunting bounty
@@spartannige3296 well, they did let me establish a CIWS system on my roof but they stole all the ammo to use it as seeds for their 30 mm tree farm. They even left me a message. "Get trolled"
As person who’s studying cyber security I can say that this is probably the only way you should do it. My only critique is that with the 12 gauge shot gun they did not tell you the proper room to ammo ratio but fear not I shall. From what my professor told me is that for every room in your house you want one and half rounds (armor piercing obviously). Thought for every hallway you want 3 rounds. So if you have 4 rooms but 2 hallways connecting it 9 rounds. Though keep in mind this is under the assumption that every room is “average sized”. Also if you cant get your hand on a flash-bang for some odd reason high intensity fast random pulse strobe lights work as well.
I didn’t think I would ever watch a Bosnian Ape Society video that made me laugh harder than the first one I watched. There have been countless gems since, but, as with so many things, nothing was ever quite as good as my first… until this one. I cannot understate just how brilliantly this entire shit post is written: the dialogue; the setup; the payoff; the grinding juxtaposition of the narrator’s calm, flowery, even poetic explanation of home defense step-by-steps with the blunt insanity actually unfolding on screen- It’s this effortless dance between the two that drives every beat of the story; never lingering for a moment longer than needed, but never sprinting ahead of itself; taking only the perfect amount of time to generate as much friction as it can until the two voices become unable to co-exist. When the apocalyptic force of a quarter-trillion joule nuclear explosion is revealed to be not only withstandable, but harnessable thanks to a swig of Sweet Baby Ray’s, the sheer absurdity obliterates (literally and figuratively) the entire structure upon which both the world and the story are precariously balanced- drowning out the collected voice of reason, and bringing all that remains crashing down into chaos… then silence. This video is a masterclass in story telling. It has no right to make any sense- for something so inherently absurd. And yet, it does. If you’re down here in the comments reading this, then you know it does too. You felt it. You laughed at it. You got it…You maybe even got it like you did with your first Bosnian Ape Society video. So cheers to you, my friend. Cheers to this work of art. And cheers to the chase for the next one. I hope you find it.
Well written. Out of curiosity, which Bosnian ape society video was your first? Mine was on how to properly navigate a roundabout. I sat in utter disbelief with my mouth open as the camera shifted focus to the Su-35 super flanker that was quietly stalking the driver. And then i knew i wanted more.
@@AndreasSweden “How to protect your computer from a main battle tank.” When the whole desk blew up like five seconds in, I was so completely taken aback. Uncontrollable laughter for the rest of the video and an instant subscription.
Great advice, I too had to repel a home invasion lately, and I followed the steps shown here to annilhate my enemies. However, I would have to note that sometimes the home invaders may have tricks up their sleeves, as during this home invasion, the two remaining home invaders had prepared an Übercharge and were therefore immune to the Uraninum-235's explosion. I was able to fortunately repel them, though, by challenging to a game of lethal rock, paper scissors, to which I won, and as per the universe lethal rock, paper, scissors agreement, they immediately exploded into giblets.
AdriFlux Well, I remember a lot more noise at the final bit about “you have ascended to a plane of existence touched by no other living man”. But that might just be me misremembering stuff. I think the main difference is that this one has less noise.
Thank you for this advice.a week after i acquired these resources my home was invaded.But as i was not lacking i followed these steps and the beings of Serbian Origin were Wiped of the Face of the Earth.Thank you!
I watched this when was originally uploaded. Since then, I've used this method to repel 3 different home invasions (2 Serbian invasions and one invasion by a pack of feral Brazilian jaguars). But two months ago, I encountered a problem with this method. My home came under assault by an elite infiltration force from the Isle of Man. I followed the steps here as I'd done before. However, this time, one of the invaders had brought HIS OWN bottle of Sweet Baby Ray's and managed to redirect the directed nuclear explosion I had launched at my attackers. Fortunately, I was prepared for this possibility and utilized my Apache AH-64E Version 6 attack helicopter to catch them unawares and fend them off using a generous compliment of AGM-114 Hellfire missiles. What I want to know is why didn't the technique in this video work for me during my fourth home invasion?
Because Manx people are famously known as wizards and will do anything you can think of. It is completely random if you can repel an invasion from them or not.
This is indeed distressing, as we, the Humble and Ever Faithful Supplicants of His Holiness Sweet Baby Ray have long operated under the assumption that we alone could imbibe his sweet manna and attain a frail fraction of his endless power, which could easily lay low any mortal foe. Your account, if verified, challenges the most basic tenets of our sacred faith, and what was once dismissed as heresy must now be confronted as reality: perhaps Sweet Baby Ray is not as benevolent as we were led to believe.
@@Karys-_- This conclusion makes sense. But just to ensure I'm prepared for any outcome, what would you suggest I do in the event that the invaders ALSO scale up their quantities of uranium and Sweet Baby Ray's?
@@AceKiIIjoy Replace Uranium block with block of ²⁵²Cf. If it doesn't work, you should lock them up in a room, best underground, concrete walls, floor and roof. When they all enter lock them up using 18 000 kg pure stall block. While they try escape you use Zyklon B and you drop it inside, remember to wear gas mask, Zyklon B gas will kill them, and even if they will have masks, you can drop your backup 550 kg ball of ²⁵²Cf for confidence they aren't alive. And remember to drink vodka and chew with pickled cucumbers for protection and addational strenght. (Works for everyone except Asian's) (Slavic people have buff)
Can’t believe this information is available for free. I will be sharing with all my family and friends, as they have had home invasions in the past. This will be incredibly useful for them! Thanks
Thank you so much for bringing this one back, my friends and I love to watch your content during pauses in our daily jobs (deployed overseas in combat) and your humor and straight forward style are iconic for us, thank you so much for keeping us entertained. And remember, a shrimp can lobster, but a lobster cannot shrimp.
I enjoy the fact that the sheer energy from 500 KT worth of TNT at 3:09 made my pc freeze, and it's worth mentioning that it has never happened before. My guess is that my RTX 2060 started to strike once it realized his GPU brothers and sisters were tortured by rendering the particles in the beam of fissile material
This channel saves lives, my house was invaded a few days ago but I remembered what you taught me. God knows what could’ve happened if I didn’t watch this video😮💨
I am so glad this video is back. You don't know how many times I have been subjected to home invasion by entities of Serbian origin, and have completely forgotten what to do about it.
i read the title and thought this was a tutorial on how to invade a home Edit: ive read through it and saw some very useful tips, thank you for uploading this
Hello, I followed this tutorial and I all went according to plan. However I recommend the Topol-M cold-launched, three-stage, solid-propellant, silo-based or road-mobile intercontinental ballistic missile in case you can’t compress and replicate the fission process of a nuclear weapon with the URANIUM 235 in the video, and also incase an enemy retaliates with 3 armoured divisions containing multiple T-72 Soviet-designed main battle tank that entered production in 1971, along with BMP-3 Soviet and Russian infantry fighting vehicle, successor to the BMP-1 and BMP-2s. In the unlikely case that the enemy has a Borei Class series of nuclear-powered ballistic missile submarines being constructed by Sevmash for the Russian Navy, equipped with RSM-56 Bulava developed for the Russian Navy and deployed in 2013 on the new Borei class of ballistic missile nuclear submarines, use the Kortik or Kashtan modern naval air defence gun-missile system deployed by the Russian Navy. I also recommend the Vepr-12 multipurpose semi-automatic detachable-magazine shotgun, produced by Molot-Oruzhie Ltd. It is patterned after the original Kalashnikov rifle and built on the heavier RPK light machine gun receiver. as a supplement for the 12-Gauge Shotgun. If you need to use it at a range, use common 12 gauge slugs If the enemies come at a distance and you need to use your stun grenade, get a HK69A1 40 mm grenade launcher developed and produced by the German arms manufacturer Heckler & Koch (H&K). The weapon was designed to engage enemy troops and strongpoints out to a distance of 350 m; it can also be used to deploy smoke grenades and illumination flares. These were perfect for launching grenades at a distance.
That isn’t even better way simply grab a cheaper barbecue sauce and throw that then grab the baby rays in swig the entire thing that makes your human recoilless done 10 times more powerful
I am sorry guys i have failed they took the living room, kitchen, bathroom and 1 room There is a intense fight in the stairs but my defense is collapsing, this is my final message. Goodbye.
Sounds like someone forgot his Sweet Baby Ray's BBQ Sauce. It's the taste that makes you great. Get your very own bottle of Sweet Baby Ray's BBQ Sauce at your local Tesco. So what are you waiting for. Come on down to Tesco for your Sweet Baby Ray's BBQ Sauce.
Home break ins by Eastern Europeans are the very thing I am most afraid of. Thank you for this helpful tutorial, yes everyone should know how to perform implosion compression of U235 using their hands. Once again you have shown a meaningful and balanced approach to solving one of my biggest fears (BTW my wife is Polish and I am terrified of her.......because she is Eastern European).
It is also useful to practice this procedure using live materials, I have been doing this frequently, and I am constantly refreshed on the tactics that will ensure my survival should there be any home invaders
I followed up your instructions, and turns out to be effective. As I have also bring in the Uralnovzgrod T-80BVM with 125mm 2A46 APFSDS from my backyard, I also grabbed the KS-23 shotgun with flashbang ammo which it went very effective then my expectations following this. The only problem is that the GDR Trabant 601 is too small to fit in a 12.7mm NSV machine gun which if I could, I'm easily turning into a counter offensive strike against the invaders, hunting them all in one. I'm happy that this instruction will now protecting my bottle of vodka and my PC -and the browsing history- .
I needed this in my life again. The final lines that drive me to become greater than God even in the face of total annihilation is what brings me to become the pinnacle of man.
Thank you for this easily digestible and mercifully short tutorial. I’m not going to spend hours to prepare for the end of the world. I’m not even going to spend 5 minutes. Hell, I won’t even get off the couch to PREVENT the end of the world. So 3:33 is the perfect length. Hey, could you do a tutorial on how to prevent nuclear attack without getting up from the couch or shifting to an upright sitting position? That’d be great, thanks.
I love how this went from hiding and protecting yourself from unidentified hostile entities that has been all around the nation and actively threatens the survival of human civilization, To immediately seeking vengeance in absolute fury and using your bare hands to trigger a nuclear explosion and achieving apotheosis, effectively becoming a god, and the said hostile entities now merely pose even such a speck of significance nor threat to your existence - only needing to aim your beam of fissile material at them and they will be nothing more but warm ash in the wind. All to avenge a Sweet Baby Ray's.
Dear Bosnian Ape Society,
The yield you report from a 20,000kg compressed block of Uranium is rather low, at only about 226GJ or 54.01 tons of TNT. This suggests that prompt criticality has only barely been achieved, causing what is effectively a fizzle, rather than the significantly supercritical explosions which are a feature of most effective nuclear weapons.
I would like to suggest some small improvements to the helpful instructions you have already laid out, which if properly applied should significantly increase yields to a level more appropriate for effective home defense.
First we must analyze the proposal laid out by the video. In order for the solid cube you depict -- 101.5 cm on a side, judging by the density of Uranium -- to not already be critical, we may upper bound the isotopic composition using the geometric buckling of this cube as 3*(pi/101.5cm)^2, from which we determine the composition to contain significantly less than 15% U-235 and mostly U-238. This does have the benefit of being easier to obtain from existing nuclear supply chains, but as we will see this will also form one of the sources of the lackluster performance described in the tutorial.
Now for some suggestions:
1. I would recommend starting with a hollow pit construction, which by lowering the effective density (and therefore increasing geometric buckling) will allow the usage of either more or a higher enrichment uranium, and more importantly also increase the ease of reshaping it into a more supercritical configuration. For beginners, a hollow prolate spheroid will be easiest to compress by two hands, and an aluminum pusher plate can also make easier the application of even pressure.
2. In preparation, the exercise of especially the pectoral muscles should be emphasized. Proper form and training goes a long way towards achieving maximum criticality.
3. Fusion boosting, by the injection of several milligrams of deuterium into the pit prior to compression, can help improve yields for those concerned about their performance.
4. Somewhat paradoxically, using a smaller amount of Uranium could improve yields here by minimizing the probability of a stray neutron initiating the chain reaction before significant supercriticality is achieved. The spontaneous fission rate of 20,000 kg of the isotopic composition inferred above produces at least 231,000 neutrons per second, giving an extremely small window for implosion to take place. In fact, I would judge this to be the likely reason for the fizzle described in the video. Using a smaller amount of a higher-grade Uranium will decrease the background neutron rate for two main reasons. First, and somewhat obviously, the spontaneous fission rate is proportional to the amount of material, so a smaller amount of material will lower the background neutron rate and give more time for compression to supercriticality. Second, and perhaps more surprisingly, U-235 actually has a far lower spontaneous fission rate than U-238, so these higher grades will also do even better on an equal-weight basis.
5. A polonium urchin, wrapped thinly in beryllium and gold, and placed at the center of the pit, can also help kick-start the reaction as soon as the pit is fully collapsed.
Please let me know if you have any questions. With crime by Serbian home invaders on the rise, I am deeply cognizant of the need for home defense and am grateful to this channel for making such informative and high-quality tutorials freely available for the general public. It is my hope that my suggestions can also help those looking to protect their property and family from Serbian home invaders.
But what if a "fizzle" was the desired effect all along?
it scares me that you both know so much about nuclear weapons and that you are sharing this knowledge on the internet
@@Inglonias I mean, you can probably get this stuff off of the internet.
This was incredibly informative! Thank you! I had a gut feeling that I might not be getting a high enough yield, now I can rest easy knowing my home is properly protected.
Think about the fact that in 1945 the Soviets would start a war over the information in this RUclips comment.
I followed this tutorial down to every step, and it almost worked perfectly. The only problem I found is that there was a single seat, twin engine, supermanuverable Sukhoi Su-35 Flanker-E air-defence figther observing me the whole time. It didn't even consider me a threat because it was too busy laughing at my complete and utter incompetence
Just get a Eurofighter Typhoon, or even better, an F-22 Raptor, that'll solve your problem
@@TheRogueminator Nah he needs to keep a AAA battery in his backyard.
What you need is a man portable shoulder held laser guided FIM-92 Stinger.
As long as you have an appropriate car for beginner drivers, with all-wheel-drive and a twin-turbo V8 engine, any of these options should work.
@@TheRogueminator Or a F-35
This channel never misses. Much like an AGM-65 Maverick Precision Guided Air-to-Ground missile.
Or a LeClerc MBT waiting in ambush.
Or my dad with a belt
What about the The AIM-120 Advanced Medium-Range Air-to-Air Missile.
true though it could miss in theory (the aim120)
@@dankuser8303 Dad OP pls nerf
“For if you do not know your next move, neither can they”
I love that quote
Describes my life perfectly
I am currently on the run from the FBI and Mafia and I and watching this on a Samsung Smart fridge in an IKEA.
I am quickly running out of ideas of where to hide, I already tried the ball pit in Chuck E Cheese but a child ratted me out.
I must go, I hear footsteps coming
Literally read this a second before he said
That’s literally the American war doctrine😂🤣🤣
They aren’t wrong though…
This will be my motto when I enlist in the military
I like how the channel presents simple solutions to common problems.
True and the things we need are always so easy to get
Yeah I mean who doesn’t have a solid block of the most radioactive stuff on earth just lying around?
@@NathanMyers-g2wthat’s polonium I think
@@NathanMyers-g2w What you don't?
@@NathanMyers-g2wwhat do you mean _"a_ solid block of uranium"? I have 12 of them right now
2:07 "For if you do not know your next move, neither can they".
-Sun Tzu, The Art of War
As a Serbian Home Invader, this sets back my plans significantly.
It's called "Bosnian" ape society for a reason
This actually helps me, now I know how to improve my house invasion methods
Thankfully, I'm a Filipino Home Invader.
With great Baby Rays sauce comes great irresponsibility.
Try invading Greek homes, instead of Serbian homes. If nothing else, you might find Moussaka.
So glad we can watch this again. I had already forgotten the date of the upcoming invasion of my home.
Mark it on multiple calendars; someone keeps altering my computerized 'home invasion' notifications.
What happened to it??
@SkepticDylan Oh ... I am new to this channel, so I thought it was a brand new video. I am glad it was restored. It's one of the ones that has a voice actor, which is better than TTS in my opinion.
666 Likes
you also forgot the upcoming invasion of macedonia
*"For if you do not know your next move, neither can they"* Genius, this will save so many people's lives 😂
American doctrine.
Cringe alpha male: has a plan (is predictable if you know the plan)
Based sigma male: makes up a plan as he executes that very plan (very effective against serbian home invaders)
"the voices sound familiar, but you cannot place.them" - I think the point here is that "you" is having a psychotic episode and family are trying to help him out
Imma use this as my senior quote
@@Caffeine_Addict_2020 who is you and how do you know it to the point of calling it a he
I absolutely LOVE the low quality, noisy, poorly adjusted domains, default settings, basic models, badly rotated particles, and unadjusted lighting in...whatever 3d software you are using. Looks like blender. I always try to aim for perfect photorealism, but this channel's videos have brought me above that.
what did i learn today about sweet baby ray's BBQ sauce:
-burns hot enough to vaporize tungsten
-if ingested, gives a (supposedly normal) person the capability of channeling the full force of a nuclear blast, essentially turning the subject into goku.
did i miss anything?
After following this clear to understand instructions, I could see that the number of my home invasions dramatically decreased.
I lost my house because I forgot to paint it with Sweet Baby Ray's BBQ Sauce tho
@@WowLookAtThat a common mistake unfortunately
I find it works better if you PRAY TO YOUR BARBEQUE SAUCE like the whole thing I'm talking chanting,HOLY writings,incents and ritualistic sacrifice
From 0 to 0?
also because there are less houses now
I work at a grocery store, and every time I see a bottle of Sweet Baby Ray's come through the register, I can't help but think of this video. Thanks for the reupload.
Thanks, I thought I was crazy. Everyone else is acting like this was their first time seeing it.
What happened to the original? Original was better. :'(
Yeah, thought this was a reup
Just be proud that you’re helping people survive nuclear explosions with the power of Sweet Baby Ray’s
@@samuelloomis9714 it's the same one
Thank you very much Bonsian Ape Society. Your detailed tutorial for avoiding the home invasion tactically is effective both practically and mentally. You managed to save me, my wife and my four children from home invades of duolingo. I followed all these steps carefully and survived the situation but rest in piece my chill ketchup. Thanks for the tutorial you indeed saved those from the home invaders.
“For if you do not know your next move, neither can they”
Story of my life
As an El Paso Resident this will greatly improve my home security, thank you.
We must stay vigilante hombre
As a Serbian home invader, this has seriously impacted my business
As an unidentified being of Serbian origin with malicious intent, I must make a new plan to achieve my goals.
instead of invading homes i would recomend chess
@@Beans-dweller, how can I invade chess?
@@serbianslav5494 queens gambit
Don't worry, you've got until 2:11 am on December 1st, 2027 to think of a new plan
@@serbianslav5494 by putting checker pieces on a chess board
Next video should be “How to Save Your Wine Cellar From an Ohio Class Nuclear Submarine armed with 14 Trident SSBNs”. I need this in my life as I recently lost my 1857 Chateau d’Yquem to a Trident strike. Sad days.
“How to Save Your Wine Cellar From an Ohio Class Nuclear Submarine armed with 14 Trident SSBNs”
Absolutely brilliant line. Definitly worth a video.
Sorry to hear about your 1857 Chateau d’Yquem.
All iv'e lost is my Tesco shopping cart. Didn't have enough ERA plates on it.
I feel you man. I also recently lost my hermit crabs from a nuclear trident missile launched from an ohio class submarine at exactly 3 AM in Eastern European Standard Time in my apartment complex, in the suburbs of Athens, while I was collecting my daily cat hunting bounty
@@masculineman123 The disrespect! Did they at least allow you to mount the AT4 on your Mercedes AMG GT before launching the Trident?
@@spartannige3296 well, they did let me establish a CIWS system on my roof but they stole all the ammo to use it as seeds for their 30 mm tree farm. They even left me a message. "Get trolled"
@@masculineman123 What bastards! Tell me you reused the 20mm Oerlikons auto cannon from WW2 that everyone keeps in their cellar.
My grandpa was a Serbian home invader and unfortunately this is exactly how he passed away 😢
As an Iranian, I want to thank you for giving me the self-defense advice I need to make my dreams come true
I literally want to meet the guy who runs this channel and just congratulate him for making such funny content
I have yet to find higher quality shitposts
Hahahaha... Actually no... It's funny until it saves your life...
@@paulwaltersheherfeministvl521 two girlfriends?
Chungus brother?
@@kimjongchungus7548 brother
I needed a re-run of this drill. Thank you for this, my paranoia has been satisfied by the informative nature of this survival guide.
I’m glad this man is back, it was hard surviving without his survival tips
True
As person who’s studying cyber security I can say that this is probably the only way you should do it. My only critique is that with the 12 gauge shot gun they did not tell you the proper room to ammo ratio but fear not I shall. From what my professor told me is that for every room in your house you want one and half rounds (armor piercing obviously). Thought for every hallway you want 3 rounds. So if you have 4 rooms but 2 hallways connecting it 9 rounds. Though keep in mind this is under the assumption that every room is “average sized”. Also if you cant get your hand on a flash-bang for some odd reason high intensity fast random pulse strobe lights work as well.
This is the best video that I have ever watched and I have been watching RUclips for over half of my life
I didn’t think I would ever watch a Bosnian Ape Society video that made me laugh harder than the first one I watched. There have been countless gems since, but, as with so many things, nothing was ever quite as good as my first… until this one. I cannot understate just how brilliantly this entire shit post is written: the dialogue; the setup; the payoff; the grinding juxtaposition of the narrator’s calm, flowery, even poetic explanation of home defense step-by-steps with the blunt insanity actually unfolding on screen- It’s this effortless dance between the two that drives every beat of the story; never lingering for a moment longer than needed, but never sprinting ahead of itself; taking only the perfect amount of time to generate as much friction as it can until the two voices become unable to co-exist. When the apocalyptic force of a quarter-trillion joule nuclear explosion is revealed to be not only withstandable, but harnessable thanks to a swig of Sweet Baby Ray’s, the sheer absurdity obliterates (literally and figuratively) the entire structure upon which both the world and the story are precariously balanced- drowning out the collected voice of reason, and bringing all that remains crashing down into chaos… then silence.
This video is a masterclass in story telling. It has no right to make any sense- for something so inherently absurd. And yet, it does. If you’re down here in the comments reading this, then you know it does too. You felt it. You laughed at it. You got it…You maybe even got it like you did with your first Bosnian Ape Society video. So cheers to you, my friend. Cheers to this work of art. And cheers to the chase for the next one.
I hope you find it.
Well written.
Out of curiosity, which Bosnian ape society video was your first?
Mine was on how to properly navigate a roundabout. I sat in utter disbelief with my mouth open as the camera shifted focus to the Su-35 super flanker that was quietly stalking the driver. And then i knew i wanted more.
Sir this is a Wendy’s
@@TheMiningMeteor oh shit, whoops
@@AndreasSweden “How to protect your computer from a main battle tank.” When the whole desk blew up like five seconds in, I was so completely taken aback. Uncontrollable laughter for the rest of the video and an instant subscription.
Yes, very well said, indeed.
Great advice, I too had to repel a home invasion lately, and I followed the steps shown here to annilhate my enemies.
However, I would have to note that sometimes the home invaders may have tricks up their sleeves, as during this home invasion, the two remaining home invaders had prepared an Übercharge and were therefore immune to the Uraninum-235's explosion.
I was able to fortunately repel them, though, by challenging to a game of lethal rock, paper scissors, to which I won, and as per the universe lethal rock, paper, scissors agreement, they immediately exploded into giblets.
Ah, so knockback is disabled, no rocket jumping then :(
This should be taught in 3D modeling schools as an example of how to just make something fun project without needing complex animations or a reason.
This is what happens when you tell CAD engineers to "have fun" with the project.
This is the best channel on youtube. I've said it before and I'll say it again. Best regards to Bosnia, and to Herzegovina also!
Plot twist the people at the door we’re your friends coming to check on you after isolated yourself from the world for three weeks.
As a person who never got my house invaded, I can confirm this is accurate
Then you are unfortunately not prepared, as December 1st 2027 is rapidly approaching. Optionally, avoid El Paso, Texas until the New Year of 2028.
I love when these scenarios start out as more realistic and then slowly devolve into confusing chaos
As a Serbian home invader, this made me rethink my plans.
Father les behavior
As an El Paso citizen, I'll be watching you
👁👁👈👈
👁👁👉👉
Назад на планирање
Hello, someone in an office getting a notification that yet another person has clicked on this video wishing to learn about thermonuclear weaponry.
At any given time, I proudly have no less than 10 bottles of Sweet Baby Rays in my pantry.
Finally another upload, these always make my day better
Edit: Is this sponsored by sweet baby rays and why would you do this to my ears.
I wouldn't say another, as its a re upload
@@khora3845 hey I'm a little hazy on the old version of this vid, did it have the synthetic voice in contrast to the human one here?
@@davidprestt6703 it’s the exact same as I remember
AdriFlux Well, I remember a lot more noise at the final bit about “you have ascended to a plane of existence touched by no other living man”. But that might just be me misremembering stuff. I think the main difference is that this one has less noise.
I have experienced many home invasions in the past week and this has been very helpful, I no longer experience home invasions
Remember you need toned arms in order to initiate super criticality
As a Brit, this is what I imagine some coming of age ceremony in America would be.
lol naw, thats just shooting a deer
As an american, can confirm, we have to defend a home invasion from unidentified beings of serbian origin with malicious intent.
Naa, they are practically barbarians, they use ketchup instead of Sweet Baby Ray's.
@@nunya6537 More or less
More like a gender reveal 🤣
I tried this at home and it worked!! Thank you for this very informational video.
Thank you for this advice.a week after i acquired these resources my home was invaded.But as i was not lacking i followed these steps and the beings of Serbian Origin were Wiped of the Face of the Earth.Thank you!
I watched this when was originally uploaded. Since then, I've used this method to repel 3 different home invasions (2 Serbian invasions and one invasion by a pack of feral Brazilian jaguars).
But two months ago, I encountered a problem with this method. My home came under assault by an elite infiltration force from the Isle of Man. I followed the steps here as I'd done before. However, this time, one of the invaders had brought HIS OWN bottle of Sweet Baby Ray's and managed to redirect the directed nuclear explosion I had launched at my attackers.
Fortunately, I was prepared for this possibility and utilized my Apache AH-64E Version 6 attack helicopter to catch them unawares and fend them off using a generous compliment of AGM-114 Hellfire missiles.
What I want to know is why didn't the technique in this video work for me during my fourth home invasion?
Because Manx people are famously known as wizards and will do anything you can think of. It is completely random if you can repel an invasion from them or not.
This is indeed distressing, as we, the Humble and Ever Faithful Supplicants of His Holiness Sweet Baby Ray have long operated under the assumption that we alone could imbibe his sweet manna and attain a frail fraction of his endless power, which could easily lay low any mortal foe.
Your account, if verified, challenges the most basic tenets of our sacred faith, and what was once dismissed as heresy must now be confronted as reality: perhaps Sweet Baby Ray is not as benevolent as we were led to believe.
You didn't used enought uranium or Sweet Baby Ray
@@Karys-_- This conclusion makes sense. But just to ensure I'm prepared for any outcome, what would you suggest I do in the event that the invaders ALSO scale up their quantities of uranium and Sweet Baby Ray's?
@@AceKiIIjoy Replace Uranium block with block of ²⁵²Cf.
If it doesn't work, you should lock them up in a room, best underground, concrete walls, floor and roof. When they all enter lock them up using 18 000 kg pure stall block. While they try escape you use Zyklon B and you drop it inside, remember to wear gas mask, Zyklon B gas will kill them, and even if they will have masks, you can drop your backup 550 kg ball of ²⁵²Cf for confidence they aren't alive.
And remember to drink vodka and chew with pickled cucumbers for protection and addational strenght.
(Works for everyone except Asian's)
(Slavic people have buff)
Can’t believe this information is available for free. I will be sharing with all my family and friends, as they have had home invasions in the past. This will be incredibly useful for them! Thanks
Thank you so much for bringing this one back, my friends and I love to watch your content during pauses in our daily jobs (deployed overseas in combat) and your humor and straight forward style are iconic for us, thank you so much for keeping us entertained.
And remember, a shrimp can lobster, but a lobster cannot shrimp.
As a military, how accurate is that flashbang sound? Spot on if you ask me. 😂
I enjoy the fact that the sheer energy from 500 KT worth of TNT at 3:09 made my pc freeze, and it's worth mentioning that it has never happened before. My guess is that my RTX 2060 started to strike once it realized his GPU brothers and sisters were tortured by rendering the particles in the beam of fissile material
This channel saves lives, my house was invaded a few days ago but I remembered what you taught me. God knows what could’ve happened if I didn’t watch this video😮💨
pov: youre on mid-page of a lego instructions: 2:24
I am so glad this video is back. You don't know how many times I have been subjected to home invasion by entities of Serbian origin, and have completely forgotten what to do about it.
I mean I was looking glad because you know helps me that people have forgotten how to repel me
0:53 finaly a reason to use that thing
Wait, you also have a limited ww2 20000kilo block of uranium 235?
Im surprised u don’t
"sir is that Uranium?" *here comes the sun starts playing*
As an unidentified being of Croatian origin, this has minimal effect on my plans
Thank goodness my home is safe after this training
Good one Mr. Ape, you showed those law-abiding homeowners who’s boss!
2:07 that tip is *Genius*
I have been looking for this channel for a week and now FINALLY I FOUND IT THE ORIGINAL VID LETS GOOOOO
this is one of my favorite videos to ever exist
Finally, I can address this critical flaw in my home security setup.
The legend has outdone himself again, truly will be remembered for ages as the most incredible home Invasion tutorialist to ever live. 420/10
Never again will I fall folly to ignorance and underestimate the sheer power of Sweet Baby Ray's.
so glad to have a tutorial on how to protect home with these common household items.
This has improved my efficiency. Thank you.
0:43
To get rid of the white border on the edge of the camera, go to: Render Properties > Screen Space Reflections and set edge fading to 0
I live in El Paso and I was caught so off guard when they started talking about my own house
i read the title and thought this was a tutorial on how to invade a home
Edit: ive read through it and saw some very useful tips, thank you for uploading this
i dont know what i would do without this channel
“If you dont know ur next move neither can they” smartest thing I have ever heard
Very nice, this will definitely go on my FBI file report after committing mass atrocities
Hello, I followed this tutorial and I all went according to plan. However I recommend the Topol-M cold-launched, three-stage, solid-propellant, silo-based or road-mobile intercontinental ballistic missile in case you can’t compress and replicate the fission process of a nuclear weapon with the URANIUM 235 in the video, and also incase an enemy retaliates with 3 armoured divisions containing multiple T-72 Soviet-designed main battle tank that entered production in 1971, along with BMP-3 Soviet and Russian infantry fighting vehicle, successor to the BMP-1 and BMP-2s. In the unlikely case that the enemy has a Borei Class series of nuclear-powered ballistic missile submarines being constructed by Sevmash for the Russian Navy, equipped with RSM-56 Bulava developed for the Russian Navy and deployed in 2013 on the new Borei class of ballistic missile nuclear submarines, use the Kortik or Kashtan modern naval air defence gun-missile system deployed by the Russian Navy.
I also recommend the Vepr-12 multipurpose semi-automatic detachable-magazine shotgun, produced by Molot-Oruzhie Ltd. It is patterned after the original Kalashnikov rifle and built on the heavier RPK light machine gun receiver.
as a supplement for the 12-Gauge Shotgun. If you need to use it at a range, use common 12 gauge slugs
If the enemies come at a distance and you need to use your stun grenade, get a HK69A1 40 mm grenade launcher developed and produced by the German arms manufacturer Heckler & Koch (H&K). The weapon was designed to engage enemy troops and strongpoints out to a distance of 350 m; it can also be used to deploy smoke grenades and illumination flares. These were perfect for launching grenades at a distance.
This has no reason to be this in depth but I love it
@@TacoTurkey haha I’m glad you enjoyed my comment on this video.
Sounds like someones been lacking
@@doughboywhine uh oh
@@doughboywhine wdym
0:26 numerous unidentified beans
This channel is more understandable than trigonometry
As a black market fissile materials supplier, I see this as an absolute win!
Finally, the reliable home defense tutorial is back, I can move on from the pepper spray + lighter flamethrower I have to a more effective method.
That isn’t even better way simply grab a cheaper barbecue sauce and throw that then grab the baby rays in swig the entire thing that makes your human recoilless done 10 times more powerful
An infintite creation of wisdom
0:09 i thought this is an SCP vid for a second
this feels like the ramblings of a personality core from portal
I don’t think I have EVER laughed so hard at a video before 😭 So funny yet so effective I have now successfully defended my home.
I am sorry guys i have failed
they took the living room, kitchen, bathroom and 1 room
There is a intense fight in the stairs but my defense is collapsing, this is my final message.
Goodbye.
DO NOT GO GENTLY INTO THE DARK NIGHT.
You've been caught lacking.
I can send you some more Sweet Baby Ray’s, just keep holding out!
Sounds like someone forgot his Sweet Baby Ray's BBQ Sauce.
It's the taste that makes you great.
Get your very own bottle of Sweet Baby Ray's BBQ Sauce at your local Tesco.
So what are you waiting for. Come on down to Tesco for your Sweet Baby Ray's BBQ Sauce.
Everyone who reads this: take this as a lesson as to why you gotta keep that mf thang on you.
Home break ins by Eastern Europeans are the very thing I am most afraid of. Thank you for this helpful tutorial, yes everyone should know how to perform implosion compression of U235 using their hands. Once again you have shown a meaningful and balanced approach to solving one of my biggest fears (BTW my wife is Polish and I am terrified of her.......because she is Eastern European).
As a certified home invader I now know how to defend against this
Sure you do, that's what you all say. 🧐
How to defend against it: don't go close to the maniac
@@georgeoldsterd8994 I just stole your sock what you gonna do about it?
@@somepvpguy69 joke's on you, I never had any socks!
@@georgeoldsterd8994 cuz I've been stealing them since I was born! Nyohihoho!
“For if you do not know your exit point, neither can they.” The sincerity in his voice is hilarious.
Thanks this helped a lot.
Thanks for this guide, it’s much better than my previous strategy of unleashing a 60kilo snow leopard onto my enemies
"if you do not know your next move, neither can they" That Got Me Laughting Hard..
It is also useful to practice this procedure using live materials, I have been doing this frequently, and I am constantly refreshed on the tactics that will ensure my survival should there be any home invaders
Thank you, this helped me alot, it also done a huge service and made clear land to build more homes!!!
A nuke turned into a directed energy beam is epic.
I followed up your instructions, and turns out to be effective. As I have also bring in the Uralnovzgrod T-80BVM with 125mm 2A46 APFSDS from my backyard, I also grabbed the KS-23 shotgun with flashbang ammo which it went very effective then my expectations following this. The only problem is that the GDR Trabant 601 is too small to fit in a 12.7mm NSV machine gun which if I could, I'm easily turning into a counter offensive strike against the invaders, hunting them all in one.
I'm happy that this instruction will now protecting my bottle of vodka and my PC -and the browsing history- .
Vodka is a great coolant for every PC!
I love how he just casually adds solid uranium 235 😂😂😂
"...for you have ascended to a plane of existence touched by no other man."
except for Shaggy
I don't think I've ever laughed so hard at what is essentially a barbecue commercial in my life
This man is living it up, existing in a inter-dimensional rift between timelines, where the Yugoslav War never ended and it’s a Balkans battle Royale
I needed this in my life again. The final lines that drive me to become greater than God even in the face of total annihilation is what brings me to become the pinnacle of man.
Thank you for this advice!
1:20
A weapon to surpass Metal Gear!
That guy watching this on December 26th, 2027, from El Paso Texas is going to be shocked when he sees us Serbian home invaders.
The text to speech pronounced everything perfectly except “recoilless”
Thanks this really helped the tutorial was really simple and easy to follow
Thank you for this easily digestible and mercifully short tutorial. I’m not going to spend hours to prepare for the end of the world. I’m not even going to spend 5 minutes. Hell, I won’t even get off the couch to PREVENT the end of the world. So 3:33 is the perfect length. Hey, could you do a tutorial on how to prevent nuclear attack without getting up from the couch or shifting to an upright sitting position? That’d be great, thanks.
I love how this went from hiding and protecting yourself from unidentified hostile entities that has been all around the nation and actively threatens the survival of human civilization,
To immediately seeking vengeance in absolute fury and using your bare hands to trigger a nuclear explosion and achieving apotheosis, effectively becoming a god, and the said hostile entities now merely pose even such a speck of significance nor threat to your existence - only needing to aim your beam of fissile material at them and they will be nothing more but warm ash in the wind.
All to avenge a Sweet Baby Ray's.
I’ve been dying to know how to do this. Thank you so much
this is the greatest youtube video I’ve ever seen