My ex narc husband knew all he had to do was ask and he got what he needed time and time again because I did it out of love and I wanted that same thing in return. Unfortunately, I only received breadcrumbs.
Really Lee you thought she would better never mind if you saw what i'd know you had to go get there and put that in the rub of a car there's not true brother yes yes not sure I don't know what you mind telling your brother but they're just not true bro you think of what I'm saying but I just learned this nasty session thing and I applaud you brother for going to get you some help because I'm seeing the dark side of this and I applaud you brother for going to get yourself some help now go out bless you
You do not love a narcissist you love their potential. It was a trauma bond. Cut them off forever. There’s no unconditional love for a narcissist that’s self-hate.
He wanted to know how I was able to stay positive & overcome the negative experiences 😌 I recognized he had a personality disorder & slowly removed my self until I had the power to cut all ties. I found out he had multiple “options” & actively dating others. I did not confront him about it, I just cut him off. He popped up at my job a few times, I no longer have a set work schedule.
At one point we went to counseling. The councelor wanted to meet with us separately. When I met with the councelor he said, “when did you decide that you have so low self worth that it is acceptable how he is treating you?” I was taken aback. I honestly at that time could not fully wrap my head around it. But he told me what I needed to hear.
That’s so interesting because our couple’s counselor (whom he chose) asked to meet with us separately and she said almost the same exact thing. I wish I’d listened to her back then. I’m out now, but it took two years after that conversation for me to actually leave
Giving a narcissist counseling, from what I've heard from psychologists who have had to counsel narcissists, only makes them more dangerous, easier to hide their nefarious ways and slip under the radar. My advice? Cut All Contact. If you can, of course. I am a chronically and incurable ill 37 yr old woman who absolutely has to rely on and live with my narcissist father, so it's an impossibility for me. I am, however, his favorite person, and infinitely more intelligent than him, so those two facts combined with my knowledge I've accrued from psychologists who specialize in how to deal with narcissists (all free to watch on RUclips) have empowered me GREATLY. I know the game better than he does. Does he still upset me, make me angry, make me cry? Yes. Do I take it personally? Nope, he's got Issues, with a capital I, that have nothing to do with me or anyone else. Completely unescusable. Plus, my best friends (Mom and my sister) know who he is, but unfortunately more intimately, as they weren't/aren't his favorite. I am. I still love him, he's my daddy, but good God, do I know how effed up he is. Thankfully he's not the worst of the worst of narcissists I've met or else I'd have no love for him at all.
Same exact thing for me! I played the recordings that I had made of the horrible verbal and physical abuse I was subjected to, the counselor looked at me and said “You are not here to save this marriage, you are here to validate what has been happening to you. What can I do to help you.” My now ex narc of 27 years insisted on counseling because he was SO CERTAIN THAT THE COUNSELOR WOULD SAY THAT I WAS AT FAULT! He took no responsibility for his abusive behavior, but his insistence on counseling backfired. I filed for divorce and left him within a month of this session.
I definitely can relate. I was engaged and on my way out the door, ex told me he scheduled therapy for himself bc he knew I wanted him to get help. We went and when I went separately the counselor encouraged me to leave. Especially since he didn’t schedule his individual session like I had. Within two weeks I was gone. It’s been almost two years.
I told him yesterday there is nothing holding me to you and i rather choose to be alone and happy and replied: this breaks my heart. 😂 i was about to ask: do you even have one?
you nailed it. Before and even after I left, self-sabotage was how I described that messy ass monster's behaviour. I absolutely gave up by the end of it. What's the fucking point with assholes like that. They're always miserable no matter what you do.
He lost me for 5 yrs. Then contacted me. I returned it has been the worst roller coaster ride I've ever had for the pass 14 yrs. They do not change. They get more evil and meaner. Now that I know what's wrong with him. I feel free as a bird. I repeat THEY DO NOT CHANGE. THEIR IS NO LOVE APPRECIATION LOYALTY OR ROMANCE WITH NARCISSIST.
You are so right!! They don’t change at all! They come back to destroy you and they portray a changed version of themselves, but give it time. You’ll see those same patterns and even worse!!
It’s been 3 weeks since I blocked my ex narc. These videos are keeping me strong in letting him go. I know it will never get better. Each time I forgave and took him back, he would end up always hurting me worse. Be strong and know your worth ❤
Me too kept taking him back and it was worse I had to cut him off 3 weeks today we were together 13 yrs till we split last yrs after getting fed up with the cheating
After treating me so bad, a narcissist told me "He loves me." He begged that I talk to him after 15years and told me that he would explain himself. He said- "If only you know how dead I am inside." I WAS SHOCKED. It was his first time saying things like this. I don't know if I would believe him again. I decided to ignore it. I am happier now. Blocked him already. IM DONE
Please note from the dialogue that it is "access to supply". If you think you for one minute that you were ever loved or regarded as anything other than a source for a very comfortable life, watch more videos. You are an ATM, an appliance, a thing that is there to feed their ego and torture you while you die a very slow death waiting to get back the person who loved bombed you - You will never be valued as a real human being...they simply do not have the capacity to give a shit and make it right.
And once you finally come to this realization, the confusion goes away. You can start to see it for exactly what it was and nothing less. You’ll start to replay moments in your head and finally be able to make sense of what was happening. It’ll become laughable, but with a bit of disgust on top. They are totally incapable of true love. They are addicted to the honeymoon phase of situationships. Like a kid with a new toy; plays with it often until a new one comes out. Gets bored with the new phone and back to the old one to see if it still works. Took me so many years to come to this realization, but I’m here now. If I do cry, which is rare now…it’s never tears for him or because I miss him. It’s me remembering those wounds and understanding my own trauma and processing it in a healthy way. Something the Narc can’t even do. What a sad existence.
He didn't come back, he knew I saw the truth. He couldn't be bothered to try and manipulate me anymore, too much effort for him. I'm sure he misses the supply but he is not willing to work on himself or the connection. He was cold and didn't show emotions, trying to make me look crazy when he drove me to breaking point.
Also, he DOES know I'm the best person that has ever happened to him. He told me during his times of weakness and I believe him because I know it's absolutely true. Too bad for him though, because I made it crystal clear when I kicked him to the curb that I am happy on my own. ❤
Those very rare vulnerable moments are the worst because you get to see the person they might have been if the narcissistic personality disorder never happened. Too bad they get angry and punish you for making them feel that way directly after.
True, they will regret only the fact they CAN'T continue to abuse you! My ex husband knows I don't give a damn about him and he CAN'T take it! Wants to get back with me so he can triangulate, manipulate and gas light me. Those days are OVER 💯 and I am happily contently single for 4 years now 🙌🏽
Good for you! Crazy thing is, If you were to take him back, he would act a COMPLETE fool and really try to destroy you! They are sick creatures. My ex would try so hard to get me back! I found myself in the exact same situation over and over and over and over! I had to pause and really get to the bottom of my own insecurities. Realized I had a lot of childhood trauma and this became normal to me based on my upbringing. I can see it for exactly what it is now. I see him for the shallow person he is. It’s all about winning and conquering. The more I rejected him, the harder he would come at me. Then turn around and do the same thing again!!! So glad that’s over and done with.
@@kellithomas9080 He would drag me if I were to ever take him back 💯😂, that's OUT! I went through the SAME cycle you are describing with your ex for 20 years 🤦🏽♀️ thinking that his heavy pursuit of me was because he truely felt remorseful and loved me that much that he would change 😂😂 WRONG, each time it got worse! The man had a child and another on the way by 2 different women while I too was pregnant and we were married LOL! That was the FINAL straw for me! I know he only wants to get back with me so he can get me caught up n mentally abuse me some more and throw his kids and BM's and other women in my face every chance he gets smh! My issues stemed from childhood trauma as well and although I am my worst critic at times I know my worth and nobody could ever play with me again 💯💜
I cried and suffered and lost myself over someone who was manipulating me into making me think that they loved me when they didn’t :( Why play people like this
Me too and I’m crying now because they tricked me and courted me when I wasn’t looking for love and said I love you but actions didn’t show silent treated me for no reason 😢
I kept allowing to excuse her treating me like dirt most of 2023 and now i wish i hadnt done the no contact for 5 weeks starting sept. She got her a new supply and she sounds very happy yet i am miserable. I'm even thinking now that maybe i became a narc because of her.
They literally destroy everything and then wonder wtf happened! It truly is sad. Then they work so hard to build a new mask and find a way to make life work again. Never ending cycle!
"Narcissists regret losing ACCESS to you. Not what they have done to you...not how they treated you....not what they put you through."🔥🔥🔥That wraps it up right there. If you really internalize this sentence....you can really understand the disorder. WE can look introspectively without shame...they cannot. The emotional connection isn't there anyway....so why would there be regrets with the exception of CONTROL and ACCESS? Wow!💥
This is so true. I left in January after 23 years and he still cannot stop drinking enough to make it to work. He still cries anytime we talk. He doesn’t understand why we wouldn’t come back. It blows my mind that he doesn’t get it. Lol!! Also, he’s had many women over since then. I knew I really meant that I was not going back because I didn’t feel jealous. I’m not saying that it doesn’t hurt at all, because there is so much hurt. But it is what it is right now. Gotta keep going!!
When you said , "You just want to matter", that is EXACTLY what I have been saying. I want to matter to the one person who cares about no one. It will never happen. Ill get there. I will heal.
The reason you are so miserable by the time you leave is because you already know you don't matter. You know they don't care it's clear, because you wouldn't be a shell of your previous self. You care about someone you support them to grow. Not suck the life out of them then say alll the issues are you. Anyone self reflective will believe that for so long. I couldn't understand why I had never been like this before but I genuinely was convinced I was chaotic and insane as a person. Don't get me wrong, I want out, I want to heal and have the relationship that grows etc. But anyone would be lying saying they don't care when you realise you never mattered. You will survive it off course. But it hurts because your feelings were real despite theirs. ❤
At this point, i don't care if he will regret losing me. I dont care if he has/will replace me. My leaving is for my own health and safety. He already has weaponized his family's money against me. Im taking extra steps, at great expense, to make sure that im ok when i finally cut him off.
My husband has lost me for good after 27 years of marriage and a 30 year relationship. He became abusive and that happened one time. I refuse to give him another chance to do it again. He definitely lost his “best supply!” I’m done with that BS. I’m 67 years old and I refuse to live that way the rest of my life!
I am proof of everything he’s said. I left me ex several times cutting off contact and he always regretted it. This last time he came back, I really thought he was gonna be better and our relationship got deeper than ever and we even lived together…but it STILL ended the same 3 years later. Y’all, people can regret not having you but like he said, that doesn’t mean they’ll still do better by you.
Grade A supply here. I spoke to her tonight after a couple of weeks of no contact. She cried and told me she regretted cheating and hurting me. She said she recognizes how her actions caused her to lose her family and that she lost everything and it wasn’t worth it. I pressed her on if there were other times she cheated. She finally admitted she cheated last year, too. 😢 I feel so hurt. I just can’t understand how someone can cheat and then come home. And act like everything is fine. We went on a big vacation later last year together which I organized. The feeling of betrayal is so intense. We were together 10 years, married for the past 7. Now she says she’s getting “help”, she’s going to go to therapy asap, and she has been trying to get in my good graces little by little. I don’t believe a word she says anymore and it hurts to hear the words I wish were true. Watching your videos helps me to remember who she really is.
Lee, all my respect for working on yourself and sharing with others. I had two npd exes. One refused going to therapy after losing me, committed suicide, may he rest in peace. The other one, God knows what he is up to... I pray that everybody struggling accepts and gets help.
A narcissist talking about their actions is really nice. It’s the accountability that will never be found anywhere else. They do know what they do and these videos are so validating after all the usual games and gaslighting.
Well he walked away, blocked me and went NC. I didn’t work for seven years and at the breakup told me all the bills I could start paying. He wanted to be in my daughters life until I filed for child support. His mom was behind him all the way stealing my stuff as well. I’m pretty worn down.
They "lack the ability to treat you well". Ugh! That is the ONE thing I asked of him on several occasions. He always said he'd treat me right but never did. And yes, the ego was through the roof!!!! And yet, he was super insecure. NPD sure is a roller coaster. 😢
Yea I couldn’t understand that either, he always said my ego was too big which huh? Lol I can be confident, but I don’t have no ego that big to where I can’t apologize or take accountability. Yet he’s insecure and has very low self esteem.
i was the perfect supply. i was 20 he was 23. i was fresh, never been in a relationship and naïve. i dedicated myself to him. i nearly worshipped him. he was never faithful in our 5 year marriage and in the end i made one move and he blames our separation on the one move i made because of the years of hurt he caused me. it may take some time but eventually he’ll regret losing me and his 3 boys. he’s acting like he’s moving on but i know he’ll never be as happy with whoever he finds and whatever he’s doing. i know for a fact i was the best thing he could have ever had.
That’s really sad. I think that sometimes people are definitely trauma bonded and confused about what love is for them but I also believe that some people (like myself) know what love is and even though we know the person is not a healthy partner for us we still have love for them and hope that they can heal and not be the worst version of themselves when we see past all the trauma in them and we know they could be much happier (genuinely)… it’s a shame that people become adults who abuse others, especially adults who abuse people who love them so much. It’s terrible for the victims of narcissistic abuse but we can heal and move on and the narcissist has to live with themselves forever, if they don’t work on themselves, what a horrible life to live being superficial and fake nice, and always having to hide your truth. That’s no way to live.
Cut off in traffic yesterday and the words out of my mouth were" What's going on beautiful people?" instead of cussing them out! So I guess listening to your videos have done more than just help me heal!😆
I just married a NARC, lucky for me I found out before he had a chance for him to move in with me. Secretely I am going to get a divorce and moved on.I wasn't sure if he was a NARC or not but luckily through all these videos I have been listening to, and his behavior, I realized that he's a NARC. Thank you God for sparing me because it is still very early in my relationship.
They become very stalkery. They build a supply bear and become very stalkering. My grandmother said it's a poor rat that only has one hole to crawl out of make sure you have an exit strategy going into the rathole.
they don’t care they always find better meaning others who are successful, they move on and so should you.I dealt with a narc who was very entitled and was use to successful women (bragged about it) so they don’t care. mine doesn’t think I know the “true” discard reason. they think they are smarter than you and you won’t catch them. Let that ish go and find someone who appreciates you. they will forever be dissatisfied after the love bombing stage.
All I ever wanted from him was a little affection. Don't tell me you love me if you can't show me. When he ended the relationship and I calmly walked away he slammed the door behind me.
Shut it down!!! I am so much happier now that I know I was raised with NPDs which led me to the same type of men. The last ex saw me earlier this year looking good in the club, and although he never came to my table, he finally tapped me on my shoulder while I was dancing to say hi. I acknowledged him, and swung my ponytail right around and kept dancing as I cracked up laughing!! He really hurt my heart.... never again. He will never change because he doesn't think its him. Ha!
I'm so done I don't care if I mattered .. what's important right this minute is that I know I matter is that NOW TODAY that I see I matter. & that's probably why this person even crossed my life path ...
He said it a few times over the year “I didnt treat you right” and you dont deserve that. And than he said but you didnt say No, right? Or I know I hurt people with my words and behaviour “ So at some point I realised he Knows allright He just doesn’t give a 💩 nor does he change.
Took me 22 years to realize what exactly I was dealing with and how to call it! At his full blown NARC mode. These videos are a God send and an amazing source of therapy! Thank you!
its always a very big sign to me that someone might be a narc when they start talking about how someone matters to them but they only mention material or physical things that are valuable to them. Even when you see one someone like Lee, who is trying to work on themselves, there is still this very materialistic aspect to it. Its's like the emotional qualities or character of a person are simply non existent... its very interesting
I once saved her life, she came back from a date with another man, I was pissed.. I went back to her apartment and discovered she was lying hopeless on the bed cos she had an asthmatic attack aftermath. I called the attention of other neighbors cos she was seizing breath continuesly as she was hopeless on the bed. We rushed to a hospital that night at 12:00AM I'm not God but she might have given up if I never loved her despite the fact that she left me drained that night. I can't imagine someone will still go on to keep manipulating you after I saving her life. That is how demonic narcissists are.
Damn Lee……Sometimes I want to go back to being ignorant to all of this. Now I’m a shit show out here realizing how I can’t be everyone’s supplier and unable to escape their hatred cause I’m still not all the way healed and find myself even more targeted cause not smart enough yet to fly under their radar!
My ex told me that as a human being I was trash, but still wanted me to sleep with him. He told me he didn’t respect me (like duh you never did). I let him know that I no longer want to be with him and now I’m blocked 😂.
Yup...I've been there. I was every name in the book..only for him to circle back. Try to treat me nice to get some..I say no..then the name calling starts again...
Hello I was going through the same thing but I was curious about what was going on so now I understand it enough to shake my self back because it was hard and painful to stay in that relationship with a narcissist and toxic person
Pride comes before a fall...Narcissists need therapy abd healing from childhood wounds otherwise they will end up alone. I protected myself from kindly asking them and telling them no need to call text or email me ...they were shocked since I always accept them and their apologies....then wished them luck ... hung up the phone then blocked then from all communication lines.
So much of this resonates! But curious if anyone else has had the experience with a narcissist where they actually react VERY emotionally when you leave- hysterical crying, guilt trip, 30x phone calls, 10-page emails, apologies, showing up at your house… until you agree to talk to them and they suck you back in??
Mine went on for 4 years and it would have gone on forever but by accident I answered the phone I thought it was one of my children as I was in a health issue but it was him. I told him I was afraid of him and hung up. He has left me alone (10 yrs now) I am certain he will never bother me again. I got lucky he lives in a different town now thank goodness. I never see him and do not feel his energy in my town anymore. I did lose over 50 thousand dollars and forced to be homeless with 2 children from a house I bought over 70% of but I was able to recover. He is homeless and now has to fake life with bottom feeder very overweight narc women to have a place to live. Someone was looking out for me to make sure my time with him was short and our engagement didn't turn into an actual marriage. I am grateful everyday I am not with him anymore and do not ever want him in my presence again.
YES, All of the above…. This is called STALKING. Get yourself a protection order, Sounds like you have a psychopath that is escalating . I would move and never look back.
Our ego is merely our fears the more you feed it the bigger it becomes. That means the more you bend down to your fears the bigger they become and the more they take over.
I’m sure mine hates me because I outed him to his local community and I tarnished his greater public image. I’m sure I’m the root of all his problems. I’m the only girlfriend he’s ever had who ISNT a drug addict. I refused to become combative with him. I just dissociated and packed my stuff and left. No contact almost 6 months.
My narc husband is currently in jail and has been for the past 2 weeks to the day. I wonder if he has any regrets.. he’s lost me, his job, health insurance, and home. On top of that he’ll now have a criminal record. Part of me is praying this will be enough to change him but knowing him he’s probably blaming me for everything 😢
Narcissists always blame others ... (The bank is guilty, you are guilty...). They can´t reflect themselves. Narcissists are children in adults bodies. You are not responsible for choices of others... Everybody is responsible for themselves. So never feel guilty because you are not.
@@isabellapiesch4180i still feel guilty and cant move on. I feel like a failure and yet when i did a no contact for 5 weeks she got her a new bf and even tried to downplay the fact. I even tried to re-kindle what i thought we had but it just got worse.
In moment of alcoholic clarity, he told me that I was a total catch and listed all the things that he liked about me and he was proud to be with & he even told me he found the right one I felt special and I believed him Then he turned on me weeks later !! I don’t get it. I’m just floored 😢 How do you tell someone all those things and then be so cold 😢💔 Now, after watching all these videos, he can’t have access to me anymore. I can’t take it anymore. ! 😢💔 he knew I would always come back but this time had to be for GOOD NO MORE! Now I feel like I didn’t even matter - I’m sure that he will find other women (he always has) to treat badly His treatment of me got worse overtime not better Bc his drinking got worse too He don’t care because he’s drinking. He can’t feel because he’s drinking. Maybe one day if he ever sobers up, he might regret losing me but it will be too late I AM the BEST thing to happened to him!
This is so hard to deal with... my husband is a NARCISSIST and it really kills me. I had to block him at every turn just to get him to understand to STOP N GO GET THE HELP HE NEEDS... he has yet to do this. He forced my hand to leave. This is very very hard... I haven't filed divorce papers because I'm hoping things will change but with this video... I'm assuming he will never. It's just hard and it hurts. You can't love a person to sanity. You can't love so that they can give it back... you have to love from a distance... n that's what hurts. No i don't think anything will change... because it hasn't happened. I'm just giving myself time to heal... it's just crazy to love a person and all the while they don't give a dayum about you. Just a hard pill to swallow.👑💋
I think what gave me the strength to cut off my NPD friend was realizing that being around him was enabling the maladaptive behavior. So I owned that part, knowing I'm never someone to hurt anyone else, and I left.
I just came across your page as i am learning more about Narcissists! I respect that you are bettering yourself! I wondered why I surrounded myself all my life with toxic people. And I realize that my mother, sister and my recent supervisor have all the traits that you talked about. I was afraid to leave all of them because they need help. I realized that they will not change so I had to make a change for my happiness. My mom and sister will never admit they are a narcissist. I started a new job in a new city and noticed the narcissistic traits in my new boss and sadly decided to resign. After pleas with my mom and sister, I have not seen or spoken to them in almost 4-years. I continue to understand this disorder to keep recognizing the traits and validating my reasons for them not being in my life, which hurts to my soul! Thank you for sharing your journey!
Im not a feminist but im a independent woman who loves to be on my own. My parents told me i needed to get married after each divorce.. like there was something wrong with me😜.😅😅. I gave all i had thinking that was a good thing. It wasn't they tried to tear me down. I told my mom i love you but i don't want to be like you!! ❤ I had my share though...
This was really heart-wrenching to hear. After years of weekly cycling between love and hate, I finally took the step and blocked my narcissistic partner. Every day I remind myself of what I’ve been through, and how starkly it contrasts with my own internal experience. Thanks for your video.
It’s been a year since I terminated the employment of narcissistic employee. She was extremely toxic to her coworkers and myself. When I terminated her employment I also blocked her on my phone. She tried to get in contact with me through social media (mainly LinkedIn). I blocked her there as well. I’m glad I haven’t heard from her since.
Finally makes sense! I've been binge watching your videos. I sit in silence after LEAVING with NO CONTACT. 22 years of unimaginable hurt and pain 💔 that I couldn't understand even after I left. wasn't easy. He did not want a divorce, but now I believe it's the failure to maintain fear and control hurting more, than my absence. Glad you found help, and chose to help others. 🙏
You really speak truth! I know my husband has mental issues. He is a malignant narcissist. I chk every box on. Now he's doing this exact thing. Calling and acting like nothing happen. My brother asked me an important question. He asked "What I'm I getting out of a conversation with him"? He needs a fix and I'm gone for good, divorce soon to follow. But thank you for this much needed life saving info. 30 yrs later and I'm moving on. I didn't not respond to his last call and will not respond to anymore. And I feel a sign of relief.
Man, your recovery seems like it's going well. I don't know if you're aware, but your focus seems to be improving as well, just in the last few months, so you're doing something right.
So accurate! My husband trained me up to be exactlyly how he wanted me..i got away after many years, but the first mention of divorce he was out gallvanting to quickly replace me, with younger and better im sure, but so far no luck..he cant quite believe i still dont want him.. 5 years later.
I left again and plan NEVER to return. It took me 30 yrs to find out what was wrong with him. Lying cheating gas lighting disrespectful no loyalty at all. I packed up and moved while he relaxed at the kitchen counter on his computer. Now 9 months later hes calling asking why he hasnt heard from me. Telling me how good things are.
He lied to me ,he manipulated me, he would always find his way through when i was trying to cut every contact...the last thing was to cheat on me...and I discovered in a very nasty way during a trip we had in Italy that he arranged as a gift for me... I feel still devastated but these videos really help me to acknowledge the fact that i deserve better ❤
I don't need confirmation to know that he regrets losing me. He is gonna look for what I gave him in every person he meets. And while I have compassion for him as a person, I will never go back there. He just abandoned our daughter and that's where I draw the line. I'll be damned if you hurt my baby. He is giving me the silent treatment because he fafo when I set a boundary about texting me and he got downgraded to emailing me. So, I haven't heard from him in about 2 months. My daughter is paying the price because he is mad at me for implementing a boundary. That shit is crazy
They don’t love you, they love what you do for them ya’ll.
It kills me.... But it's true
Thread over, whoever leaves last please turn out the lights. THIS!
A whole FACT
🥺
💯
When you learn to accept the fact that you never mattered to them, you've won half the battle.
Absolutely
They never did never will. They are selfish, self centered people
When you learn to accept that they are mentally ill.....
100%
Very true
Unconditional love with a Narc is Imprisoning yourself.
💯
so true
I was ready to do that
My ex narc husband knew all he had to do was ask and he got what he needed time and time again because I did it out of love and I wanted that same thing in return. Unfortunately, I only received breadcrumbs.
Perfect statement!
A Narcissist will treat you worse and be more disrespectful if you take them back again !!!
🎯🎯🎯
Really Lee you thought she would better never mind if you saw what i'd know you had to go get there and put that in the rub of a car there's not true brother yes yes not sure I don't know what you mind telling your brother but they're just not true bro you think of what I'm saying but I just learned this nasty session thing and I applaud you brother for going to get you some help because I'm seeing the dark side of this and I applaud you brother for going to get yourself some help now go out bless you
Facts.. It happened to ME 🤌🏽🤌🏽🤌🏽
I almost lost my mind living with my ex for 31 yrs I’m happy I divorced him no matter how hard it was leaving.
Omg 31 years😮@@normachase7227
You do not love a narcissist you love their potential. It was a trauma bond. Cut them off forever.
There’s no unconditional love for a narcissist that’s self-hate.
💯
So true!
Pay attention to what our government is doing.
The potential!!
Never to be realised.
Yes! 🎯
It’s scary to think you could be with a narcissist and not know it , we should post their pictures up on a website with a surgeon general warning 😢
😵💫
Wouldn't that be a great resource?? But they'd post messages that we were crazy.
😂
Pictures along with the manic devaluing text messages .... I HAVE SOOO MANY!!! Sometimes reading them is what helps me stay no contact....
I agree
The Narcissist's biggest regret is that they did not totally decimate you.
This is the ONE!!!!! Best comment yet!!!!
This!!!!
He wanted to know how I was able to stay positive & overcome the negative experiences 😌 I recognized he had a personality disorder & slowly removed my self until I had the power to cut all ties. I found out he had multiple “options” & actively dating others. I did not confront him about it, I just cut him off. He popped up at my job a few times, I no longer have a set work schedule.
@robinjohnson1003 Well done in cutting him off. We cannot change what happened to us in the past, but we can hold stronger boundaries in the future.
So true! He literally got upset because someone helped me out in a way he COULD have, but chose to watch me struggle instead. He was soooooo mad! 😁
Their loss. I read the other day someone said “they lost a diamond while playing with stones”. I’m no contact. No access. Access denied. Game over.
Same!! All of it!!!
Staying in our power every day 💪
@@louiseelliott6404
SAME HERE - Praise GOD! 🙌🏽🙏🏽💫💫💫
💯
At one point we went to counseling. The councelor wanted to meet with us separately. When I met with the councelor he said, “when did you decide that you have so low self worth that it is acceptable how he is treating you?” I was taken aback. I honestly at that time could not fully wrap my head around it. But he told me what I needed to hear.
What a great therapist!🙏
That’s so interesting because our couple’s counselor (whom he chose) asked to meet with us separately and she said almost the same exact thing. I wish I’d listened to her back then. I’m out now, but it took two years after that conversation for me to actually leave
Giving a narcissist counseling, from what I've heard from psychologists who have had to counsel narcissists, only makes them more dangerous, easier to hide their nefarious ways and slip under the radar. My advice? Cut All Contact. If you can, of course. I am a chronically and incurable ill 37 yr old woman who absolutely has to rely on and live with my narcissist father, so it's an impossibility for me. I am, however, his favorite person, and infinitely more intelligent than him, so those two facts combined with my knowledge I've accrued from psychologists who specialize in how to deal with narcissists (all free to watch on RUclips) have empowered me GREATLY. I know the game better than he does. Does he still upset me, make me angry, make me cry? Yes. Do I take it personally? Nope, he's got Issues, with a capital I, that have nothing to do with me or anyone else. Completely unescusable. Plus, my best friends (Mom and my sister) know who he is, but unfortunately more intimately, as they weren't/aren't his favorite. I am. I still love him, he's my daddy, but good God, do I know how effed up he is. Thankfully he's not the worst of the worst of narcissists I've met or else I'd have no love for him at all.
Same exact thing for me! I played the recordings that I had made of the horrible verbal and physical abuse I was subjected to, the counselor looked at me and said “You are not here to save this marriage, you are here to validate what has been happening to you. What can I do to help you.”
My now ex narc of 27 years insisted on counseling because he was SO CERTAIN THAT THE COUNSELOR WOULD SAY THAT I WAS AT FAULT! He took no responsibility for his abusive behavior, but his insistence on counseling backfired. I filed for divorce and left him within a month of this session.
I definitely can relate. I was engaged and on my way out the door, ex told me he scheduled therapy for himself bc he knew I wanted him to get help. We went and when I went separately the counselor encouraged me to leave. Especially since he didn’t schedule his individual session like I had. Within two weeks I was gone. It’s been almost two years.
I told him yesterday there is nothing holding me to you and i rather choose to be alone and happy and replied: this breaks my heart.
😂 i was about to ask: do you even have one?
The saddest thing is that most do every thing possible to make sure that supply has no choice but to give up on them. Its self sabotage
😞🥺
Exactly. 😕😞
Truth
you nailed it. Before and even after I left, self-sabotage was how I described that messy ass monster's behaviour. I absolutely gave up by the end of it. What's the fucking point with assholes like that. They're always miserable no matter what you do.
So sad but so true.
He lost me for 5 yrs. Then contacted me. I returned it has been the worst roller coaster ride I've ever had for the pass 14 yrs. They do not change. They get more evil and meaner. Now that I know what's wrong with him. I feel free as a bird. I repeat THEY DO NOT CHANGE. THEIR IS NO LOVE APPRECIATION LOYALTY OR ROMANCE WITH NARCISSIST.
😫😞
You are so right!! They don’t change at all! They come back to destroy you and they portray a changed version of themselves, but give it time. You’ll see those same patterns and even worse!!
If they come back, it will be to get even with your ass.
So true !!! Slowly but surely the old habits are still there. They come back with a vengeance
Yup.
It’s been 3 weeks since I blocked my ex narc. These videos are keeping me strong in letting him go. I know it will never get better. Each time I forgave and took him back, he would end up always hurting me worse. Be strong and know your worth ❤
Protect your peace ✌️
Same here.
Same here❤
I’m in the same boat. 3 weeks.
Me too kept taking him back and it was worse I had to cut him off 3 weeks today we were together 13 yrs till we split last yrs after getting fed up with the cheating
After treating me so bad, a narcissist told me "He loves me." He begged that I talk to him after 15years and told me that he would explain himself. He said- "If only you know how dead I am inside." I WAS SHOCKED. It was his first time saying things like this. I don't know if I would believe him again. I decided to ignore it. I am happier now. Blocked him already. IM DONE
Please note from the dialogue that it is "access to supply". If you think you for one minute that you were ever loved or regarded as anything other than a source for a very comfortable life, watch more videos. You are an ATM, an appliance, a thing that is there to feed their ego and torture you while you die a very slow death waiting to get back the person who loved bombed you - You will never be valued as a real human being...they simply do not have the capacity to give a shit and make it right.
And once you finally come to this realization, the confusion goes away. You can start to see it for exactly what it was and nothing less. You’ll start to replay moments in your head and finally be able to make sense of what was happening. It’ll become laughable, but with a bit of disgust on top. They are totally incapable of true love. They are addicted to the honeymoon phase of situationships. Like a kid with a new toy; plays with it often until a new one comes out. Gets bored with the new phone and back to the old one to see if it still works. Took me so many years to come to this realization, but I’m here now. If I do cry, which is rare now…it’s never tears for him or because I miss him. It’s me remembering those wounds and understanding my own trauma and processing it in a healthy way. Something the Narc can’t even do. What a sad existence.
More power to you in your healing journey.
@@kellithomas9080well said🙌🥹
Very well said.
I love this comment tnx guys
He didn't come back, he knew I saw the truth. He couldn't be bothered to try and manipulate me anymore, too much effort for him. I'm sure he misses the supply but he is not willing to work on himself or the connection. He was cold and didn't show emotions, trying to make me look crazy when he drove me to breaking point.
💯💯💔
Also, he DOES know I'm the best person that has ever happened to him. He told me during his times of weakness and I believe him because I know it's absolutely true. Too bad for him though, because I made it crystal clear when I kicked him to the curb that I am happy on my own. ❤
Those very rare vulnerable moments are the worst because you get to see the person they might have been if the narcissistic personality disorder never happened. Too bad they get angry and punish you for making them feel that way directly after.
💯🙌🏾
Truth... but not worth the personal sacrifice.
@@Elysion404like an alcoholic moment of clarity. And gone as quickly as it apoeared
@@recoveringsoul755 Yeah, it's both sad and frustrating.
True, they will regret only the fact they CAN'T continue to abuse you! My ex husband knows I don't give a damn about him and he CAN'T take it! Wants to get back with me so he can triangulate, manipulate and gas light me. Those days are OVER 💯 and I am happily contently single for 4 years now 🙌🏽
🙌🏾🙌🏾💯
Good for you! Crazy thing is, If you were to take him back, he would act a COMPLETE fool and really try to destroy you! They are sick creatures. My ex would try so hard to get me back! I found myself in the exact same situation over and over and over and over! I had to pause and really get to the bottom of my own insecurities. Realized I had a lot of childhood trauma and this became normal to me based on my upbringing. I can see it for exactly what it is now. I see him for the shallow person he is. It’s all about winning and conquering. The more I rejected him, the harder he would come at me. Then turn around and do the same thing again!!! So glad that’s over and done with.
@@kellithomas9080 He would drag me if I were to ever take him back 💯😂, that's OUT! I went through the SAME cycle you are describing with your ex for 20 years 🤦🏽♀️ thinking that his heavy pursuit of me was because he truely felt remorseful and loved me that much that he would change 😂😂 WRONG, each time it got worse! The man had a child and another on the way by 2 different women while I too was pregnant and we were married LOL! That was the FINAL straw for me! I know he only wants to get back with me so he can get me caught up n mentally abuse me some more and throw his kids and BM's and other women in my face every chance he gets smh! My issues stemed from childhood trauma as well and although I am my worst critic at times I know my worth and nobody could ever play with me again 💯💜
I cried and suffered and lost myself over someone who was manipulating me into making me think that they loved me when they didn’t :(
Why play people like this
I’m sorry that happened to you. 🥺
Me too and I’m crying now because they tricked me and courted me when I wasn’t looking for love and said I love you but actions didn’t show silent treated me for no reason 😢
Self love is breaking the cycle and healing child wounds. Be kind to yoir self x
Losing their access to supply/control - the ego is so big they cannot express any vulnerabilities. Stalking/monitoring is what I experienced. On 🎯.
💯
I was just trying to look into if there is a secure email program
Access = ways they use you-money, sex, favors...etc etc
💯
Yes!!!
All love should be conditional. You should never stay in the situation where you are giving and someone's treating you like shit.
100!!
I kept allowing to excuse her treating me like dirt most of 2023 and now i wish i hadnt done the no contact for 5 weeks starting sept. She got her a new supply and she sounds very happy yet i am miserable. I'm even thinking now that maybe i became a narc because of her.
To a narcissist you are nothing more than a supply nothing more!
Yep no emotions for you, all about them
Narcs are not only hurting those they target but themselves. its really sad at the end of the day.
They literally destroy everything and then wonder wtf happened! It truly is sad. Then they work so hard to build a new mask and find a way to make life work again. Never ending cycle!
"Narcissists regret losing ACCESS to you. Not what they have done to you...not how they treated you....not what they put you through."🔥🔥🔥That wraps it up right there. If you really internalize this sentence....you can really understand the disorder. WE can look introspectively without shame...they cannot. The emotional connection isn't there anyway....so why would there be regrets with the exception of CONTROL and ACCESS? Wow!💥
🙏
Perfectly said. 💯💥
Great points! They never really loved us anyway
👏👏👏
This is so true. I left in January after 23 years and he still cannot stop drinking enough to make it to work. He still cries anytime we talk. He doesn’t understand why we wouldn’t come back. It blows my mind that he doesn’t get it. Lol!! Also, he’s had many women over since then. I knew I really meant that I was not going back because I didn’t feel jealous. I’m not saying that it doesn’t hurt at all, because there is so much hurt. But it is what it is right now. Gotta keep going!!
You got this
❤
❤
Please don’t ever go back!!!
❤
When you said , "You just want to matter", that is EXACTLY what I have been saying. I want to matter to the one person who cares about no one. It will never happen. Ill get there. I will heal.
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The reason you are so miserable by the time you leave is because you already know you don't matter. You know they don't care it's clear, because you wouldn't be a shell of your previous self. You care about someone you support them to grow. Not suck the life out of them then say alll the issues are you. Anyone self reflective will believe that for so long. I couldn't understand why I had never been like this before but I genuinely was convinced I was chaotic and insane as a person. Don't get me wrong, I want out, I want to heal and have the relationship that grows etc. But anyone would be lying saying they don't care when you realise you never mattered. You will survive it off course. But it hurts because your feelings were real despite theirs. ❤
At this point, i don't care if he will regret losing me. I dont care if he has/will replace me. My leaving is for my own health and safety. He already has weaponized his family's money against me. Im taking extra steps, at great expense, to make sure that im ok when i finally cut him off.
stay strong and protect your peace
I applaud your recovery and so appreciate your service, Lee. Thank you so much.
You’re welcome
thank you ❤🙏😊💯
My husband has lost me for good after 27 years of marriage and a 30 year relationship. He became abusive and that happened one time. I refuse to give him another chance to do it again. He definitely lost his “best supply!” I’m done with that BS. I’m 67 years old and I refuse to live that way the rest of my life!
Bless your heart beloved Queen!! You chose, YOU!!! AMEN!! I SALUTE YOU.
God, is with us. You are Not, alone. ❤😅
@@Keva-jp8kc ❤️❤️❤️ thanks for the encouragement! I hope we all heal and move on.
Three cheers for you. Hip hip hurray hip hip hurray hip hip hurray . Pray that I might be able to do the same.
Was 68 after 41 years…….
They can only change if they touch rock bottom and acknowledge they are sick. And only God can transform.
And that would be a modern day miracle!!!
Pin this post! 😮
I am proof of everything he’s said. I left me ex several times cutting off contact and he always regretted it. This last time he came back, I really thought he was gonna be better and our relationship got deeper than ever and we even lived together…but it STILL ended the same 3 years later. Y’all, people can regret not having you but like he said, that doesn’t mean they’ll still do better by you.
Grade A supply here. I spoke to her tonight after a couple of weeks of no contact. She cried and told me she regretted cheating and hurting me. She said she recognizes how her actions caused her to lose her family and that she lost everything and it wasn’t worth it. I pressed her on if there were other times she cheated. She finally admitted she cheated last year, too. 😢 I feel so hurt. I just can’t understand how someone can cheat and then come home. And act like everything is fine. We went on a big vacation later last year together which I organized. The feeling of betrayal is so intense. We were together 10 years, married for the past 7. Now she says she’s getting “help”, she’s going to go to therapy asap, and she has been trying to get in my good graces little by little. I don’t believe a word she says anymore and it hurts to hear the words I wish were true. Watching your videos helps me to remember who she really is.
I'm sorry for your heart break. Cheating is The End Deal breaker in my book. Id be forever alert for next time. I'm not Jesus. 🙏🩷
Please don’t ever take her back. Let her suffer in her own misery.
Cheating and crying when you caught them is there trick to melt your heart,they can never change,unless u try therapy.
SHE HAS NOT CHANGED. Therapy will take years. Don’t be fooled. Keep moving forward.
Stay focused, in you and your healing. 😊
We never truly mattered to them
😔
Sadly that is absolutely true. 😢
It is so sad to be so evil and hurt people that care about u. Thanks for sharing.
That's wherever they lay their heads everyday. They're afraid to be homeless.
Lee, all my respect for working on yourself and sharing with others.
I had two npd exes. One refused going to therapy after losing me, committed suicide, may he rest in peace. The other one, God knows what he is up to...
I pray that everybody struggling accepts and gets help.
wow, that's horrible! It's proof they're depressed beyond any help if they refuse it. so sorry you had to deal with that.
@@swedishgirl2506 thank you
My Narc got tired of me confronting him on his lies😅😅😅😅😅😅😅they hate that so hard😅😅😅😅😅🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭
😂 I be wearing my mama out like you got to go or grow sis! We don’t do ridiculous and petty here
and thats when they block you on everything.
A narcissist talking about their actions is really nice. It’s the accountability that will never be found anywhere else. They do know what they do and these videos are so validating after all the usual games and gaslighting.
appreciate it
Well he walked away, blocked me and went NC. I didn’t work for seven years and at the breakup told me all the bills I could start paying. He wanted to be in my daughters life until I filed for child support. His mom was behind him all the way stealing my stuff as well. I’m pretty worn down.
I never mattered. It is dangerous to forget that I don't matter. Radical acceptance is safest. Be healed all.
🥺🥺
You are one strong man to look in the mirror & admit being a narcissist. Thank you sir for spreading this insight, God bless 🙏🙏🙏
They "lack the ability to treat you well". Ugh! That is the ONE thing I asked of him on several occasions. He always said he'd treat me right but never did.
And yes, the ego was through the roof!!!! And yet, he was super insecure. NPD sure is a roller coaster. 😢
🙏 power up
Yea I couldn’t understand that either, he always said my ego was too big which huh? Lol I can be confident, but I don’t have no ego that big to where I can’t apologize or take accountability. Yet he’s insecure and has very low self esteem.
i was the perfect supply. i was 20 he was 23. i was fresh, never been in a relationship and naïve. i dedicated myself to him. i nearly worshipped him. he was never faithful in our 5 year marriage and in the end i made one move and he blames our separation on the one move i made because of the years of hurt he caused me. it may take some time but eventually he’ll regret losing me and his 3 boys. he’s acting like he’s moving on but i know he’ll never be as happy with whoever he finds and whatever he’s doing. i know for a fact i was the best thing he could have ever had.
That’s really sad. I think that sometimes people are definitely trauma bonded and confused about what love is for them but I also believe that some people (like myself) know what love is and even though we know the person is not a healthy partner for us we still have love for them and hope that they can heal and not be the worst version of themselves when we see past all the trauma in them and we know they could be much happier (genuinely)… it’s a shame that people become adults who abuse others, especially adults who abuse people who love them so much. It’s terrible for the victims of narcissistic abuse but we can heal and move on and the narcissist has to live with themselves forever, if they don’t work on themselves, what a horrible life to live being superficial and fake nice, and always having to hide your truth. That’s no way to live.
😫😫
Well said. I really loved my ex despite the hard times. I feel sad for him being so deeply broken.
I love when you said this is not a sign if you want to go back.... I LOVE IT. that was a push and confirmation to continue to move forward
Cut off in traffic yesterday and the words out of my mouth were" What's going on beautiful people?" instead of cussing them out! So I guess listening to your videos have done more than just help me heal!😆
🤣🤣🤣👏🏽
I just married a NARC, lucky for me I found out before he had a chance for him to move in with me. Secretely I am going to get a divorce and moved on.I wasn't sure if he was a NARC or not but luckily through all these videos I have been listening to, and his behavior, I realized that he's a NARC. Thank you God for sparing me because it is still very early in my relationship.
Don’t let him know you know.
It could be Asperger’s to a lot of women think they are with a narc but their partner is autistic ( same abuse )
They become very stalkery. They build a supply bear and become very stalkering. My grandmother said it's a poor rat that only has one hole to crawl out of make sure you have an exit strategy going into the rathole.
NARCS DO NOT CHANGE, EVER, NEVER😅
Well this guy doing videos says he has changed thru therapy……….😊 he got help and recognized he was a narcissist.
Never there when you need them in any way, but they have full control of you.
💯💯
they don’t care they always find better meaning others who are successful, they move on and so should you.I dealt with a narc who was very entitled and was use to successful women (bragged about it) so they don’t care. mine doesn’t think I know the “true” discard reason. they think they are smarter than you and you won’t catch them. Let that ish go and find someone who appreciates you. they will forever be dissatisfied after the love bombing stage.
I still accept his jail calls because that’s just who I am. Alone in jail is too much on any human.
All I ever wanted from him was a little affection. Don't tell me you love me if you can't show me.
When he ended the relationship and I calmly walked away he slammed the door behind me.
🥺
Shut it down!!! I am so much happier now that I know I was raised with NPDs which led me to the same type of men. The last ex saw me earlier this year looking good in the club, and although he never came to my table, he finally tapped me on my shoulder while I was dancing to say hi. I acknowledged him, and swung my ponytail right around and kept dancing as I cracked up laughing!! He really hurt my heart.... never again. He will never change because he doesn't think its him. Ha!
I'm so done I don't care if I mattered .. what's important right this minute is that I know I matter is that NOW TODAY that I see I matter. & that's probably why this person even crossed my life path ...
Protect your peace
Absolutely by all means necessary
great attitude good for you!
I been gone away from my ex husband 1 yer now and I’m so happy I’m FREE❤❤❤❤ and it feels soooo good!!!
Stay safe
He said it a few times over the year “I didnt treat you right” and you dont deserve that.
And than he said but you didnt say No, right? Or I know I hurt people with my words and behaviour “
So at some point I realised he Knows allright
He just doesn’t give a 💩 nor does he change.
They can change but choose not to (period)
Took me 22 years to realize what exactly I was dealing with and how to call it! At his full blown NARC mode. These videos are a God send and an amazing source of therapy! Thank you!
its always a very big sign to me that someone might be a narc when they start talking about how someone matters to them but they only mention material or physical things that are valuable to them. Even when you see one someone like Lee, who is trying to work on themselves, there is still this very materialistic aspect to it. Its's like the emotional qualities or character of a person are simply non existent... its very interesting
They won't tell you, but they will continue to talk about you, or may hoover years later.
😞
I once saved her life, she came back from a date with another man, I was pissed.. I went back to her apartment and discovered she was lying hopeless on the bed cos she had an asthmatic attack aftermath. I called the attention of other neighbors cos she was seizing breath continuesly as she was hopeless on the bed. We rushed to a hospital that night at 12:00AM
I'm not God but she might have given up if I never loved her despite the fact that she left me drained that night. I can't imagine someone will still go on to keep manipulating you after I saving her life. That is how demonic narcissists are.
Damn Lee……Sometimes I want to go back to being ignorant to all of this. Now I’m a shit show out here realizing how I can’t be everyone’s supplier and unable to escape their hatred cause I’m still not all the way healed and find myself even more targeted cause not smart enough yet to fly under their radar!
They regret not being able to leave you a dried up sponge.
13 years an emotional slave to my Narcissistic husband, now ex. Thank God I made it out! To God be the glory
14 years and two kids 😢
My ex told me that as a human being I was trash, but still wanted me to sleep with him. He told me he didn’t respect me (like duh you never did). I let him know that I no longer want to be with him and now I’m blocked 😂.
😅😅
Yup...I've been there. I was every name in the book..only for him to circle back. Try to treat me nice to get some..I say no..then the name calling starts again...
Hello I was going through the same thing but I was curious about what was going on so now I understand it enough to shake my self back because it was hard and painful to stay in that relationship with a narcissist and toxic person
My husband use to be a narcissist but God answered my prayers and healed him 🙏😁
Really??Good for you’ll
How is he healed. Would you explain a little more.
he manipulates them more smoothly! @@teesahurt2074
Really? Of course Allah ( SWT)can do anything. You are truly blessed then.
I wonder how long he can put up the mask
Pride comes before a fall...Narcissists need therapy abd healing from childhood wounds otherwise they will end up alone. I protected myself from kindly asking them and telling them no need to call text or email me ...they were shocked since I always accept them and their apologies....then wished them luck ... hung up the phone then blocked then from all communication lines.
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So much of this resonates! But curious if anyone else has had the experience with a narcissist where they actually react VERY emotionally when you leave- hysterical crying, guilt trip, 30x phone calls, 10-page emails, apologies, showing up at your house… until you agree to talk to them and they suck you back in??
Yes for 6 years
Maybe they're co-morbid BPD+NPD?
Restrain order. Call the POLICE.
Mine went on for 4 years and it would have gone on forever but by accident I answered the phone I thought it was one of my children as I was in a health issue but it was him. I told him I was afraid of him and hung up. He has left me alone (10 yrs now) I am certain he will never bother me again. I got lucky he lives in a different town now thank goodness. I never see him and do not feel his energy in my town anymore. I did lose over 50 thousand dollars and forced to be homeless with 2 children from a house I bought over 70% of but I was able to recover. He is homeless and now has to fake life with bottom feeder very overweight narc women to have a place to live. Someone was looking out for me to make sure my time with him was short and our engagement didn't turn into an actual marriage. I am grateful everyday I am not with him anymore and do not ever want him in my presence again.
YES, All of the above…. This is called STALKING. Get yourself a protection order, Sounds like you have a psychopath that is escalating . I would move and never look back.
You’re a breathing, walking, talking encyclopaedia of narcissistic education. Thank you so much for taking the time to share and to teach the world …
Our ego is merely our fears the more you feed it the bigger it becomes. That means the more you bend down to your fears the bigger they become and the more they take over.
That stalking & monitoring is so real. I blocked on everything and they still kept tabs, reaching out everyday.
I’m sure mine hates me because I outed him to his local community and I tarnished his greater public image.
I’m sure I’m the root of all his problems.
I’m the only girlfriend he’s ever had who ISNT a drug addict.
I refused to become combative with him.
I just dissociated and packed my stuff and left. No contact almost 6 months.
stay safe
My ex was a narc..and 12 years later I realized his mother was also one.Everything you said in this video is true.
My narc husband is currently in jail and has been for the past 2 weeks to the day. I wonder if he has any regrets.. he’s lost me, his job, health insurance, and home. On top of that he’ll now have a criminal record. Part of me is praying this will be enough to change him but knowing him he’s probably blaming me for everything 😢
Narcissists always blame others ... (The bank is guilty, you are guilty...). They can´t reflect themselves. Narcissists are children in adults bodies. You are not responsible for choices of others... Everybody is responsible for themselves. So never feel guilty because you are not.
@@isabellapiesch4180i still feel guilty and cant move on. I feel like a failure and yet when i did a no contact for 5 weeks she got her a new bf and even tried to downplay the fact. I even tried to re-kindle what i thought we had but it just got worse.
In moment of alcoholic clarity, he told me that I was a total catch and listed all the things that he liked about me and he was proud to be with & he even told me he found the right one I felt special and I believed him
Then he turned on me weeks later !! I don’t get it. I’m just floored 😢
How do you tell someone all those things and then be so cold 😢💔
Now, after watching all these videos, he can’t have access to me anymore. I can’t take it anymore. ! 😢💔 he knew I would always come back but this time had to be for GOOD NO MORE!
Now I feel like I didn’t even matter - I’m sure that he will find other women (he always has) to treat badly
His treatment of me got worse overtime not better
Bc his drinking got worse too
He don’t care because he’s drinking. He can’t feel because he’s drinking.
Maybe one day if he ever sobers up, he might regret losing me but it will be too late
I AM the BEST thing to happened to him!
This is so hard to deal with... my husband is a NARCISSIST and it really kills me. I had to block him at every turn just to get him to understand to STOP N GO GET THE HELP HE NEEDS... he has yet to do this. He forced my hand to leave. This is very very hard... I haven't filed divorce papers because I'm hoping things will change but with this video... I'm assuming he will never. It's just hard and it hurts. You can't love a person to sanity. You can't love so that they can give it back... you have to love from a distance... n that's what hurts. No i don't think anything will change... because it hasn't happened. I'm just giving myself time to heal... it's just crazy to love a person and all the while they don't give a dayum about you. Just a hard pill to swallow.👑💋
I think what gave me the strength to cut off my NPD friend was realizing that being around him was enabling the maladaptive behavior. So I owned that part, knowing I'm never someone to hurt anyone else, and I left.
I just came across your page as i am learning more about Narcissists! I respect that you are bettering yourself! I wondered why I surrounded myself all my life with toxic people. And I realize that my mother, sister and my recent supervisor have all the traits that you talked about. I was afraid to leave all of them because they need help. I realized that they will not change so I had to make a change for my happiness. My mom and sister will never admit they are a narcissist. I started a new job in a new city and noticed the narcissistic traits in my new boss and sadly decided to resign. After pleas with my mom and sister, I have not seen or spoken to them in almost 4-years. I continue to understand this disorder to keep recognizing the traits and validating my reasons for them not being in my life, which hurts to my soul! Thank you for sharing your journey!
Im not a feminist but im a independent woman who loves to be on my own. My parents told me i needed to get married after each divorce.. like there was something wrong with me😜.😅😅. I gave all i had thinking that was a good thing. It wasn't they tried to tear me down. I told my mom i love you but i don't want to be like you!! ❤ I had my share though...
This was really heart-wrenching to hear. After years of weekly cycling between love and hate, I finally took the step and blocked my narcissistic partner. Every day I remind myself of what I’ve been through, and how starkly it contrasts with my own internal experience. Thanks for your video.
you got it
It’s been a year since I terminated the employment of narcissistic employee. She was extremely toxic to her coworkers and myself. When I terminated her employment I also blocked her on my phone. She tried to get in contact with me through social media (mainly LinkedIn). I blocked her there as well. I’m glad I haven’t heard from her since.
Thank you so much. I am dealing with a 33 yr marriage to a Narc. He served me with divorce papers out of the blue. The hurt is awful😢
I feel for you.😢 May Allah ( SWT) make it easier for you.
Finally makes sense! I've been binge watching your videos. I sit in silence after LEAVING with NO CONTACT. 22 years of unimaginable hurt and pain 💔 that I couldn't understand even after I left. wasn't easy. He did not want a divorce, but now I believe it's the failure to maintain fear and control hurting more, than my absence. Glad you found help, and chose to help others. 🙏
You really speak truth! I know my husband has mental issues. He is a malignant narcissist. I chk every box on. Now he's doing this exact thing. Calling and acting like nothing happen. My brother asked me an important question. He asked "What I'm I getting out of a conversation with him"? He needs a fix and I'm gone for good, divorce soon to follow. But thank you for this much needed life saving info. 30 yrs later and I'm moving on. I didn't not respond to his last call and will not respond to anymore. And I feel a sign of relief.
Protect your peace
This hit home my ex would say to me your the best thing that has ever happened to me 😢
stay strong
My first X said the same. I did not like being a "thing" that "happened to him." That's so far from being a person who was in a relationship with him.
Lost access and control over my checkbook. 👍😂💪
🙌🏾🙌🏾
Thank you so much for these, I’ve dealt with narcissistic people all my life.
Man, your recovery seems like it's going well. I don't know if you're aware, but your focus seems to be improving as well, just in the last few months, so you're doing something right.
So accurate! My husband trained me up to be exactlyly how he wanted me..i got away after many years, but the first mention of divorce he was out gallvanting to quickly replace me, with younger and better im sure, but so far no luck..he cant quite believe i still dont want him.. 5 years later.
I left again and plan NEVER to return. It took me 30 yrs to find out what was wrong with him. Lying cheating gas lighting disrespectful no loyalty at all. I packed up and moved while he relaxed at the kitchen counter on his computer. Now 9 months later hes calling asking why he hasnt heard from me. Telling me how good things are.
My husband and I have been separated for 4 yrs and he just won't let go!! It's VERY VERY FRIGHTENING!!!
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He lied to me ,he manipulated me, he would always find his way through when i was trying to cut every contact...the last thing was to cheat on me...and I discovered in a very nasty way during a trip we had in Italy that he arranged as a gift for me...
I feel still devastated but these videos really help me to acknowledge the fact that i deserve better ❤
Yesss. He’s like a whole gnat!! Just will NOT leave me tf alone even after 8 months🤦🏽♀️ stalking, calling, etc etc etc😫
You really helped piece my life back together ...thank you Lee H.
You’re welcome ☺️
I regret meetimg him and giving him the time of day. Lesson learned!!
I don't need confirmation to know that he regrets losing me. He is gonna look for what I gave him in every person he meets. And while I have compassion for him as a person, I will never go back there. He just abandoned our daughter and that's where I draw the line. I'll be damned if you hurt my baby. He is giving me the silent treatment because he fafo when I set a boundary about texting me and he got downgraded to emailing me. So, I haven't heard from him in about 2 months. My daughter is paying the price because he is mad at me for implementing a boundary. That shit is crazy