5 TIPS to take control AWAY FROM a narcissist
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- Опубликовано: 2 янв 2024
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DISCLAIMER: THIS INFORMATION IS FOR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND IS NOT INTENDED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR CLINICAL CARE. PLEASE CONSULT A HEALTH CARE PROVIDER FOR GUIDANCE SPECIFIC TO YOUR CASE. THIS VIDEO DISCUSSES NARCISSISM IN GENERAL.
THE VIDEO DOES NOT REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AND SHOULD NOT BE USED TO REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AS HAVING NARCISSISM. PERMISSION IS NOT GRANTED TO LINK TO OR REPOST THIS VIDEO, ESPECIALLY TO SUPPORT AN ALLEGATION THAT THE MAKERS OF THIS VIDEO BELIEVE, OR SUPPORT A CLAIM, THAT A SPECIFIC PERSON IS A NARCISSIST. THAT WOULD BE AN UNAUTHORIZED MISUSE OF THE VIDEO AND THE INFORMATION FEATURED IN IT. ORDER MY NEW BOOK "IT'S NOT YOU"
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SIGN UP FOR MY MAILING LIST
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LISTEN TO MY NEW PODCAST "NAVIGATING NARCISSISM"
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Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/2fUMDuT...
Stitcher: www.stitcher.com/podcast/how-...
iHeart Radio: www.iheart.com/podcast/1119-n...
DISCLAIMER: THIS INFORMATION IS FOR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND IS NOT INTENDED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR CLINICAL CARE. PLEASE CONSULT A HEALTH CARE PROVIDER FOR GUIDANCE SPECIFIC TO YOUR CASE. THIS VIDEO DISCUSSES NARCISSISM IN GENERAL.
THE VIDEO DOES NOT REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AND SHOULD NOT BE USED TO REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AS HAVING NARCISSISM. PERMISSION IS NOT GRANTED TO LINK TO OR REPOST THIS VIDEO, ESPECIALLY TO SUPPORT AN ALLEGATION THAT THE MAKERS OF THIS VIDEO BELIEVE, OR SUPPORT A CLAIM, THAT A SPECIFIC PERSON IS A NARCISSIST. THAT WOULD BE AN UNAUTHORIZED MISUSE OF THE VIDEO AND THE INFORMATION FEATURED IN IT.
My very insightful and supportive daughter says, "stop explaining yourself to someone who is committed to misunderstanding you, who is committed to their dysfunction."
Yes she is ❤
But we need to make sure what has been happening to us in disguise of the sincere relationship until we will have found out ourselves. It is inevitable and very crucial
Right
I think one of the best ways to take control away from a narcissist is to put up an information wall against them. When I went no contact, I told people close to the situation to not to talk about me to the narcissist, and I don't want to know what they have to say about me. If they don't respect that then I consider them an enabler and distance myself from them as well. Personal information is a weapon for the narcissist.
Truth! Go you!
Smart move! I left a lot of people behind to get away from the narcissist. No contact was my only option.
💯💯💯
I really don’t care about them hearing about me but I sure do not want to know anything about them.
People who triangulate with the narc are definitely enablers (flying monkeys -do we still say that?). It demonstrates their loyalty to the narc. It is required. Narcs need, want, expect everyone to accept their version of the truth and therefore should demonize the perpetrators- shun them, talk badly about them, etc.
A narc is essentially an overgrown 2 year old.
To whom we give too much power, I'd add.
@@dianas2766 The power people give them is a matter of choice but the consequences for others of the narcissist's behaviour are not.
So true ! 😀
Truly is "terrible two year old" mentality, but the narcissist refuses to learn and cannot be disciplined.
🎯
Once my dad came to my house without calling first and he said "I have a surprise for you, to help you relax I brought supper" and he gave me huge uncooked steaks. I did not know about narcissism at the time, but I felt anxious and trapped, so I said "Wait a minute, to help me relax, you are asking me to cook you supper at my house and showing up unannouced?". He smiled and said "Well, I am irresistible, am I not?". I said no "I am sorry dad, but I have children and I already spend a lot of time cooking, that doesn't feel relaxing at all". He went into a blind rage, accusing me of not having good family values and that he was ashamed I was his daughter. If I had known about this channel, I probably would have done what I do now : not answer the door.
Oh fun, narcissism plus patriarchy and misogyny, I know that combo well. Having any boundaries and not accepting that they view you as their slave equals "you don't understand what FAMILY is". To them, family means breeding your own slaves.
Never answer again...they'll push you into self doubt, self blame and you end up people pleasing till they leave and you're right back to self guilt for allowing them to invade your personal space. This happened to me and my husband just recently..we haven't spoken to his parents 3mths ago,ever since.they showed up unannounced. It wasn't ok to allow their ambushed entitled behaviour, pls don't fall for it.✌🏽💕
Hugs, Comfort, and Strength.
Heel goed dankjewel 😊
It's not a productive response unless you're planning to follow up with no-contact, but 'If you're so ashamed to admit I'm your daughter, then stop admitting I'm you're daughter and stay away" is awfully tempting.
Fake friends will believe the gossip and rumors about you. Real friends know better and will stand up for you.
Yes, in the past couple of years, I realized I had a lot of fake friends siding with the narcissist and excusing her bad behavior. The fake friends don't see their part at all in the smear campaign against me.
keep doing you !
I allow Real Friends to prove themselves by telling me what I Already Know. If you are associating with trash, the burden of proof isn't my problem
Exactly 💯
@@HealingMyselfIsTheFocusheyyyy I escaped this in early January, it does change and I have friends again and it was scary af because I really don’t trust people anymore but I’m getting there. These people don’t realise just how much they’ve helped heal me just by being friendly and opening up their friend circle to me. Please please don’t lock yourself away, try and learn to trust again ❤
They know how to FAKE empathy to the outside world, I’ve seen it and makes me so mad because I know who he truly is. They be “caring” for outside people and mistreating their own wives and making her go crazy
Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde to the max. Optics optics optics.
At the age of 53 I first time have heard about what narc perdonality is and how terible to live with narc. And I am in horror because I have found out that my derest one is narc. Refleting the past I understand there were my contributions to forming such a personality but the past cannot be changed. Now I don't know what to do even I have listened so many podcats of Dr. Ramani. The more I listen the more I feel desperate
We are collateral damage.
Yup I agree my husband will do more for a stranger than his family
If I never stick up for myself and stay silent, he gets nastier
with me because he thinks I'm a meek wimp and I won't fight back, perfect target for him whenever he feels like letting loose!!!
There's times I want to fight FIRE with FIRE, but Dr. Ramani's right, an eye for an eye leaves everyone blind.
Truthfully, interestingly well said!
The correct quote is "no more than an eye for an eye". It is about compensation for injuries (including a thourough investigation of what the value of an eye is). This is what happens when we don't go to original sources. 🙄 This delineates the difference between using and manipulating quotes, as it inflames the reader/hearer with an insinuation of revenge vs justice.
Gee, I understood what you meant and didn’t feel inflamed at all. Well said.
That's why I didn't even tell him I was leaving and my reasons why. I just left.
And it becomes soooo exhausting!
Financial independence is the only option. Thank Dr.Ramani❤
My biggest regret apart from marrying him, I gave up my job and independence, now 30 years later I have nothing, until the divorce is settled, he has full financial control, bastard.
Yes how I survive amen🎉😊
@@hannahhughes4801 I understand you😞And I wish for you to get your freedom as soon as possible 🙏🙏
Amen. I refused to quit my job. Oh yeah, he worked behind the scenes to smear me, but it didn't work.
@@twovirginiacats3753 You did the best👍💯
My experience with narcs over the decades has led me to believe narcs don't want to tell you what "the problem" is. They want you to figure out what they want on your own and go along with it no matter what. In other words, narcs want submissive psychics.
YES!!
Omg the amount of energy I have wasted (and still am) over this issue!!!
yes, it's effing mind games!
Yep. That's free labor that they're demanding from you because their gods/angels/astrology sign/whatever told them that they DESERVE it. You're supposed to be The Teacher™ and teach them to be better and/or "be more informed" FOR FREE. My response... 🚶🏿♀️
Yes they want to make you make then a better person, but I've told him too many times it's an inside job!
I asked my father if our relationship was important to him. He said no. I thanked him for the good things he did for me, wished him the best of luck in his projects and left. Haven't seen him for 6 years now, and I'm happy with that.
Wow.
@@Auntemem
Yup.. He did not even pretend.
That’s a bummer. I’m glad you know to not waste your precious time and energy tho .
@@ChaChaWitYa It was actually a quite liberating "Oh! It wasn't me!!" moment.
At least he was overt about it. My experience, they were covert, they know how horrible it is to say that outright so they rather diminish your self esteem in ways that show you they hate you. While also manipulating you and saying they do love you. Congratulations for getting the truth and being free ❤
Nothing to say, silence is golden, nothing worked with my father, sheer manipulator. I’m single and don’t get involved with anyone who doesn’t allow me to be my authentic self. Agreeableness effects my self esteem and self esteem means everything to me.
Good for you! That completely resonates with me and I support you 100% in that.
Amen!
I'm agreeable, but refuse - now, after two years of trauma therapy - to lower my standards and moral compass for anyone. I now set boundaries; an unfamiliar concept to me until two years ago.
You point out narcissist people at every angle, and their flaws. we aware of their delusional, who they are.... The truth is, no one ever can bush you something against your interest or what you don't want or interfere your value and what you believe because that's is not about change personality, when it comes to that, i strong believe that we can win that...
@@MohamedTuuraaye-cl5oy I’ve had it with narcissists. I clearly know who they are because I was raised by them and they ruined my life. That’s why I listen closely and intently to Dr. Ramani because she’s the expert.
After the year I've had in 2023 this empath has changed. I'm tired of being a doormat
I have learned from 35 years of abuse is to NOT engage at al anymore. Trying to get out now.
Same! One day at a time
Omg - exactly the same situation!
40 years… I didn’t know what was wrong. Kept thinking it was me. I’m just a couple of months away from being able to move out. Trying to hold myself together until that time. One day at a time.
I am too.
30’yeara left 2 weeks ago today .. my advice , get over them while your there .. as long as your safe x
What gets rewarded gets repeated. Make a list of basic gold standard behavior, and settle for that. They are out there, be patient, pay attention for ways to improve to basic human behavior. Block, distance, detangle from antagonistic, lying, bullying life draining fools.
@augustineschaefer5522 , thanks , I needed a reminder
@@Greenawareness188 apparently me too….love them as people at best from a distance but lazy bullies who can’t evolve get left behind. Cut and cauterize that malarkey.
Narcissist will turn you into a crazy person if you let them. The worse abuse is the one you can’t physically see, being abused mentally by a narcissist is a whole different monster only the victim sees. 😢
I have been in a online relationship with this Lady for 20 months.There was a time I thought she might be a Romance Scammer. Now I know that she is a full blown Narc.I have been in many relationships and am friends with most of my ex's . Now I think I am going crazy. I block her and delete all her contacts yet I keep turning them back on thinking she will change. Now she is pushing me to move in with her after she has flaked on me 5 different times we were to meet in person. I know 100% that is a terrible idea. She has been really nasty to me for months and every once in a while she will love bomb me and send a couple sexy pics etc. Now because i wont do what I know I should do( run from her) . I think I am flipping stupid and crazy. I've lost my grip on reality.
❤
Do I want more money? Sure. Do I want to "succeed more"? Sure. And I could earn more money and succeed more, but in doing so I'd have to lose my soul. The price is too high. Having money is important to me, but my soul is more important to me. Without that, am I really winning or actually losing? I'd say losing.
Narcissists either do not have a soul, or its so rotted to its core that all that's left is a toxic sludge with no humanity whatsoever left. Just a cancerous tumor where a human being SHOULD be. That may APPEAR as "winning" on the outside, but to me, ultimately it is losing, not winning.
As a practicing psychotherapist of 52 years, I love the way Dr Ramini hits all the important points re narcissists and explains so clearly! Thank you , Dr Ramini!
May I ask you what could be done to protect yourself but still not antagonize the narcissist? I am tired of the harassment that follows
"Radical Acceptance" It's important. Accept and do not feel guilty for moving on and moving away.
I had no idea who my father was until I was 39 and his live-in servant. So abusive. I was shocked, confused, and disoriented by all of it. Especially his gaslighting sessions and smear campaigns. This man had exploited me for his selfish purposes all of my life and I didn't know. He got worse, became meaner, more cruel, exploitative, gaslighting...I'm agreeable and he got away with too much and I'd had it. I still offer help to people who wouldn't help me for their life.
Personality styles might not be a choice, but being a manipulative liar is
Yessssss!!! 🙌
I've done this. It's exhausting. When they don't get their way they throw a fit and rage to try and scare us into giving in. Like a child
They are a petulant child just awful.
Exactly. But its tiring. I cant stand him anymore..
I calmly ask my narc brother if he's done after he throws a tantrum. I also have said to him, "you know nobody thinks exactly like you do, right?"
Moving away takes control away. Or remain unaffected by them.
Can you do the latter?
I had to physically move away about 4 months ago. It took me almost 30 years of trying to be unaffected by him. I'm so much happier and freer now.
I just moved across the country from them a month ago, and I can choose not to pick up the phone!
Until the narcissist intentionally moves to where you live.
I gave up communicating with narcissists after I had 40 years of it with my father; “you’re too sensitive, you’re a spoiled brat, you’re a baby, then, you fail at everything, what about that statistics class you got a “C” in, now you have to prove yourself to the world. I’m fed up. I had enough of it with my father and brother. I’m going narcissistic free because I can.
I am so lost and brain washed after 20 years that I can’t sort it all out in my head. I can’t even clearly explain myself and talk about things that are happening to me. He always always wins in an argument. My teenage daughter can easily and clearly fight her dad’s arguments so I can see the truth. She responds the right way but it’s not her responsibility to fight with narcissistic father.
Be patient with yourself. The narc has taken the spider role. Dismantle 😅 the web and perhaps 😂weave a basket.
Building up and taking the high road never enables destructive behavior.
Your on the way free, ur seeing the brain fog & 19 months ago @ age 58 I couldn't describe what has happened. A construction worker who couldn't read his tape measures to make a cut. Raking leaves was ABOUT all I could do & be able to finish. I'm doing much better & my Narc mum is showing her milage cuz it's hers to keep, not mine❤.
When I tried to communicate clearly during my relationship, I realized that was the end of the relationship because he showed who he really was.
I've tried so hard to keep calm and composed as a way to communicate clearly and resolve issues. It's like the rodeo, how long can you hang on for while you're constantly being interrupted and talked over as they go through all of their narc tricks to divert and confuse. There really is only two options for normal and healthy people, and objective dialogue isn't it.
Leave or don't leave.
My experience and tip is start writing your feelings down on paper. What happens is that the negative thoughts can go on paper and out of the head. You don’t have to share but it helps you to get space in the brain for positive energy.
I've been struggling with angry, repetitive rumination about all the nuttiness, nasty games, and injustice, but this makes sense. If you write it all out, then you know it is contained/held somewhere. It's also a safe place to get things "said" without further repercussions. Thanks!
And it also helps to admit in front of yourself how you feel and what's going on in the relationship. For a long time I chose to live in denial how emotionally abusive it was. Writing it down pen on paper and keeping it helps to see the reality.
That's good advice. Pain and grief tend to fade with time. I found it helpful to reread my journal whenever I felt the hoovering starting, or if I started to miss my narc. Helped my resolve to stay no contact a lot!
I'm scared to journal because my narc mother has in the past taken my journal and got offended by my feelings and even went as far as to write her own feelings on paper, like on side of my writing "seriously?? How can you say that ..." etc etc so I don't feel safe
@@1236alexaGet a small, personal safe/lockbox where you are the only one with the key. Put your journal inside. Your Mom should not be reading/responding to your private writings. If you can't get a box, start an e-journal on your computer, where you are the only one with access. You have to always try to stay one step ahead of these folks if you must be around them. All the best.
I can definitely relate to the idea of wanting a script. That used to be me. I can't leave yet, so I've accepted I'll never please my narcissistic spouse. I now avoid him as much as possible and only share information with him if I have to. I enjoy my relationships with my kids, sisters, and pets, and I don't count on him for anything vital.
Truth!!!!!!!!!
This is EXACTLY how my mom and me and my sister relate to my dad. None of of us make enough money to be financially independent and mom doesn't believe in divorce. Even if i was financially independent, i would not feel comfortable leaving my mom alone with my dad. He's been verbally and emotionally abusive my whole life. He has gone into rages before where i was truly scared fists would start swinging.
I’m in a similar boat as well. Just waiting to start working full time so I can get a mortgage then I’m out with the kids. I just ignore him. He drops his ‘comments’ as I call them but I just pretend I didn’t even hear him. It’s driving him nuts which I am secretly enjoying in my head.
Following your sessions is helping me heal and deal with a 40 year trip with my son. Why has it taken me so long to stop the misery? Probably because I was conditioned to it.
I'm an 'agreeable' person to a fault. My entire life has been surviving extremely controlling, highly intelligent, intense personalities...my mother being the only exception (another agreeable person.) I grew up in an abusive relationship with my father who was extremely controlling, easily angered, and untouchable. I married a controlling man with an explosive temper and we produced two children with intense personalities both with IQs in the 160s. For most of my life, this was normal = life with intense personalities... Suddenly one day I snapped...I was broken and I couldn't hold it together any longer. I realized it wasn't normal, it was abusive and he was toxic. It's been over four months of no contact. Four very difficult months but thanks to God, some family and friends and your sessions, I'm heading where i need to be.
THANK YOU! THANK YOU! THANK YOU! Been in a narcissistic relationship for 23 yrs and you have helped me so much these past 2 years I've been learning under you. Wow. You have truly given me back my sanity and the tools you share have changed the dynamic in how I relate with the narc. I finally woke up. He wants to dominate and devalue. I wasn't prepared when I met him. I am an empathetic, codependent, avoidant people pleaser and peace maker. I am a giver and healer. I had no idea that those qualities made me the perfect target and mate in a narc's eyes. Lost years for sure but I actually feel a burden lifted off of me now. I have radically accepted and am actively using your advice to feel less foggy, less controlled.
Same here. You are not alone 💚💚💚
Kudos to you! You've got awareness and insight. Imo, that's the first step toward healing and transcending. Your relationship sounds exactly like the relationship between my mom and dad. She was a caring, empathetic, loving person--exactly what my dad needed. She kept hoping for and wanting him to change, but he never did. My mom's love and good heart saved me from a narcissistic dad and even more narcissistic older siblings. I have more love and respect for my dear mom now than ever before. Keep being your sweet self. Good luck
Foggy, yes!!! This is really a thing. I'm so glad to learn I'm not losing it
@azurea0587 Thank you for sharing this. This comment means everything. I have children.
Good girl
I'm an INFJ. Narcs LOVE me.I cannot change from being an empath, intuitive, easy-going.
INFP here. Mostly been dealing with an ESTP…one of the most likely to become a sociopath I’ve been told, (dare I add “lol”?) … exhausting individual.
@@SophieBird07interesting
You can change to the extent that you learn what boundaries are and how to enforce them….if you get tired of always being the wounded victim. I did.
I’m also InFJ .. we feel that negative energy and can read it me ( body language ) I had a very malignant narc stepfather who wasn’t shy at using a belt ..
I’m an INFP and the narcissistic men I’ve been in relationships with have been INTJ (two of them), ENFP and the worst narc of them all - was an ENTP.
We Introverted Agreeables who've been lucky to meet this channel LOVE U 2! Evolving from this mess of a marriage (TY No Contact Situation), i have found that, overall in our lives, not only do we get back what we give, but what is served out in a spoon can come back in a shovel-ful. To me, that means StayNice 💙❣️
Isn't it interesting,... to see the law of reciprocity work in relationships. Blessings
@@teresapotts3476 you as well 💪
Never have joint finances with a Narc. If you already do, then transition slowly over to your own accounts. Also, "keep book" on what is going on with the narc. They gaslight and lie to you about any and everything. Journaling really helped to see the pattern of behavior.
I feel like Dr. Ramani was in my head. It’s shocking how she describes exactly what I’m going through, almost word-for-word. Mind-blown 🤯
100%!!!!❤
Oh yes. She knows exactly what we are dealing with. Thank the Lord for Dr.Ramani!!!!!
I have been pushed to the limit on so many levels I fear my empathy will go away. I am constantly feeling taken advantage of because when I try to enforce boundaries, the narcissist tries to make it look like I'm the one with an issue. I am so sick of this and feel that I am changing from a doormat to a wall.
Radical acceptance, exactly 😊
Sounds like my situation
Thank you for this! Absolutely brilliant.. yes I am very easy going and agreeable. I always have been this way. Always an introvert who likes to study alone, work out alone etc. I truly enjoy my own company. But I am not passive or weak. I stand up for truth, for my convictions, for children, for others being taken advantage of and narcissists hate this.
Truth:
My mother the narcissist very bossy has an agreeable laid back husband- my father who is happy to let her direct his life. 60 years married
My husband’s brother a narcissist who is married to a very agreeable passive woman who lets him do whatever he wants.
I am agreeable but I had enough. My ex & my mother etc took advantage of my kindness and easy going nature. My joy honestly is to make others happy. Their joy? Making themselves happy
Narcissism = selfishness
My dad is now a passive spineless jellyfish.
He doesn’t stand up for anyone she hurts and never disagrees w her
My husband’s brother’s wife? A shell of a woman with no personality- afraid of her own shadow who jumps when he commands it.
No thank you .
Narcs never change and they will literally suck the life out of you.
A quiet spineless women never changed the world
Sad stuff
Well said. They ruin innocent people’s lives.
I thought the reason narcissist people don’t want to give you a script is so you can be wrong once again and they can feel superior. I still remember my mother saying “I shouldn’t have to ask”. In other words, you should always know.
I have learned to treat my toxic MIL like I would treat a rattlesnake.
😂😂😂 That’s EPIC.
Epic reply… cannot think of a better word to describe my mil
My MIL makes onions cry when she cuts them.@@HRHackworth
@@livesolarge lol
Oh, man. I just walked into the cave and stated MY feeling on the news that I was about to be disinherited (for being a "terrible daughter," i.e., not compliant to the narcissists), and was immediately name-called and gaslighted. Of course. But I felt I had to speak my truth for me. I love how Dr. Ramani paints this as firing a "shot across the bow" just so I can get more clarity about the reality of the situation. I didn't do it to change them to change what they were going to do re the will (lost cause there), but I felt I couldn't keep silent, for my own integrity. I had to say "This is not okay." So I'm trying to feel good about that bravery (it wasn't fun to be shamed and further pilloried), but I do feel good about standing in my truth in this one instance.
Not easy to do. They are total twits and coward. Well done. ❤
So happy for your growth!!! ❤🎉
I did but it made the situation more worst but I also did for my own integrity
After a lifetime of narcissistic relationship's, you have enabled me to break the chain. Now I'm the strongest link, your words have been gold.
Dr. Ramani amen. Thank you for acknowledging us agreeable introverts who simply just don’t want to go to the party and have no fear of missing out. If not a easy road to stand up to the predatorial nature of people with narcissism, but I am all about the cat, the TV and the cozy blanket #PeaceOfMind.
That's me as well 😊
I’m an introvert and I am most comfortable at home
You are my people 😂
I'm with you❤
I'm so exhausted!
This video is an exact playbook on my relationship with my 24-year-old daughter.
How eye-opening this video has been.
I've spent many emotionally traumatizing days and nights, hoping things will be better, to realize that that's an unreasonable expectation.
It's so disheartening.😢
That darn awful fatigue trying to anticipate his needs & not trigger a rageful rant was never-ending
Walking into the "dark cave" would be reciprocated with silence
The only way to go for me was taking the legal route, something I had to do as physical violence could occur anytime
The legal route was a great respite for both myself and for my children
I did have a great solicitor through the years and it all eventually ended with divorce
Just regret not having divorced him rather than that awful cycles of love bombing & a hundred second chances given
I was an extroverted party woman before that toxic entanglement when I then evolved into a very fatigued introvert
Just my dog & me and tv mingled with visiting adult kiddos & darling Grandchildren
Sheer bliss
Thank you brilliant video as always DrRamini
❤
Dr. Ramani that’s a brilliant point. I’m not going to stop being empathetic. Radical acceptance is very important. I need to choose to stop being mistreated by my husband. Empathy and compassion is for a healthy relationship that it’s reciprocated. Your knowledge and experience along with the empathic understanding is my wake up call.
This is a tough situation, because when another person can pretend to have empathy, they accuse you of being the problem for everything.
Then, as you go to a counselor and start working on healing yourself and pursuing self-love, then this person will use what you told them as a new weapon to criticize, belittle, brainwash and scold you more. Speaking from experience. Ugh.
This is SOOOO GOOD!
Going into the dark tunnel with the focus on the "WHAT" they do, rather than WHY are they doing it.....shows you exactly what you need to confirm, to help yourself understand and SEE it when they react to those CLARITY statements.
CLARITY is KEY.
And the wonder and waiting part is SPOT ON!
Thanks you so much for this pep talk video/great wisdom video/and how to do it video!
Sam Vaknin explains the why. There were so many questions I had to why people behave the way they do, and his content is very good for that.
Leave. Discard. Ghost, go no contact.
Worked for Me!!!! * I refued to go into 2024 with the dark cloud (him) over my head; I'd been rained on, enough.
Best way to take control away from the narcissist is to never give it to them in the first place. Always maintain strong boundaries. By you having control over your own life, nobody else will ever have control over you.
too late.
Easier said than done.... Mainly because it creeps up on you slowly, before you know what is happening... And those of us who never knew what narscissisism was, it takes us longer to put the pieces of the puzzle together
Wish I was stronger back then, now I'm paying the price 30 years later,.
@@hannahhughes4801 remember you aren't alone... It doesn't help except to make us feel like less of a fool... I have been beating myself up for years .. at least now I can move forward a little better
It isn’t easy, but it is worth it.
1) figured out my husband is a covert narc
2) couples therapist concluded we should split up
3) realized he’ll NEVER change
4) therefore: divorce in the works
Thanks to Dr. Ramani, I have my eyes wide open to manipulations!
Thank you so much Dr Ramani. The long spoon is spot on. I took my life back, no communication, he had no idea about my life. I viewed him as a bad room mate. Limited my exposure. I had 2 friends that saw him for what he was. That was perfect, we could laugh him off. I DIALED DOWN THE IMPORTANCE OF HIM. If he had the rant, I just looked at my watch and tilted my head. He then stomped off. PERFECT. Thank you again.
Maybe they could change after an excorcism is performed 😂
It will be a waste of an excorcism😂Demons dont want to leave a person so closely identifying with them😂 they only leave those who want to change and act on it
I and my narcissistic daughter have gone no contact after years and years of abuse. I will no longer be in a situation that demeans me and acused of things I have not done. I believe she is BPD as well. Was diagnosed with ADHD as a child. A lot going on. I need to live the rest of my life in peace!
Yes, it is so hard with my daughter no contact
Going into the communication cave with my father some years ago really worked for me with my father. After that I stopped gaslighting myself in the relationship. I could see the relationship clearly.
Tried to tell my wife she embarrassed me in front of a friend. She started a fight. I said all I want to do is express my feelings. She blew up. Then the next day she did it again at a dinner party with multiple friends....I tried to tell her how it made me feel, she proceeded to tell me it was just a joke and that I shouldn't feel that way. Being new to "narcissism" I am trying to focus on the patterns....which now that I am looking, I see very clearly. Thank you Dr. Ramani.
Make a list of the relationship rights you both have. You'll find the places where only she has rights and you have none. And if you argue for one right (right to express your emotions with words), if she's like the others I've known, she'll try to take other rights from you (like the right to have your own passwords etc).
@@steggopotamus About a month ago I realized she was going through my phone at night after I fell asleep. Then checked my browser history and saw she was doing the same on my computer. I changed the passwords then the very next day she started a fight saying i was toxic for changing my passwords. I told her i will share anything she would like to know, however i feel like she is being disrespectful for just going through my personal phone and computer without asking me first. She blew up.
@@christophercollins9933 sounds right, sadly. You deserve better. Keep making those lists, it will help it all stick in your head better how she really super doesn't care about equality or reciprocation in the relationship, just control control control.
Run while you can !
Couldn't avoid my adult only child narcissist. I have learned more in the last year to understand him than in his adolescence. I am one really tough cookie to stick, but radical acceptance is my path. I do brave the occasional walk over the coals and get into a deep talk with him. I am totally in this stage of accepting this is how he is and will be.
Masterclass! The only way is out and let Go. 💔
I had a friend who we all remember being very selfless and kind when we were in school. Now we're in our thirties and she's become this person who acts like she can read your mind, constantly puts people down, constantly angry, everything feels like a big misunderstanding. Her mom emotionally abused her, and so did her ex. Now I'm wondering if it's possible that she just broke one day and became a narcissist, or if I was just naive in my youth and couldn't see it.
So true. Don't fight with them. ❌ It's the best strategy to win without fighting. 😁😁😁
👍🌹😉😁
I have a high level of trust in myself so I zipped past the self doubt. I can assure you that my personality has not changed and it doesn’t make dealing with them any easier. What has COMPLETELY changed is how much I allow myself to be exposed to them. I don’t have any in my personal life but they’re EVERYWHERE in my field of work. I put my electric fence up IMMEDIATELY if I see any of the red flags.
Oh boy, it was such a relief to confirm reality! Please anyone holding out, just confirm your suspicions so you can finally deal with it.
Talk about no empathy. My dad passed away on Monday. My narc husband insisted on coming with me when i got the call to get there to say my goodbyes. He left an hour later. Not one thought about I might need him later - even if it was just to drive me home. I'm SO hurt and angry over this.
I am in the same situation. My grandpa dying in days , my grandma sending messages to my boyfriend so that we come and visit to say goodbye. He didn’t even mentioned she contacted him!!! He didn’t even shaken his head when I told him I am going to my grandparents because it’s already very bad situation with my grandpa, it’s a home hospice now. He didn’t even looked at me from screen with a video game. Not even told anything comforting not something that „you should say” in such situation. How come they can be so detached? I wonder if they would cry at their patents funeral ?
I hear you. When my brother was hit by a car and killed my narcissist husband made me drive 13 hours alone to my hometown to help my mother with everything. I later said something I guess guilted him and he drove in but left early. All he cared about was himself. Its hard driving that far crying but I did it.
I’m so sorry for everyone 😢
Sorry for your loss.I can relate to your situation. When my baby son died my narcissist mom cleaned the bathroom and called my father to show him how sparkling clean it became after her magical touch.Three days later I remembered my baby and cried and she said that she remembered her brother who died when he was a baby over 50 years ago .she called me one day pretending that she is asking about me then told me thank God at least you still have your kids and husband but what about me? I was shocked she didn't pass through this experience, she is living with my dad there is no comparison I know she must always be more hurt more tired more more but even when my baby died she is more hurt for no reason?! These mothers will be in a hell specially made for them not even with the normal people .They do worse than killing innocents they kill us while a life and leave us with all the problems we have because of our childhood.
So very sorry for your loss. 😢 Hope you're doing alright. Try to put the narc out of your mind, and concentrate on your Dad at this time. You and your family members who truly loved your father, can comfort/be there for each other. You don't need the narc and all its drama; especially now. They use situations like this to garner attention for themselves, as morbid as that sounds. Peace to you and your family. Hugs.
With my mother there was no right. The one right was no contact.
I've learned so much from you that I am now putting an END to it. Very simple: respect the boundaries or I keep going and leave yer crazy butt behind!
It is amazing at what I forgot! Yes my mother raged if she believed or realized I was walking on eggshells around her. I was insensitive and hurtful.
It’s amazing how this is all coming back. I just survived my last Christmas with her.
Thank you God!
Christmas was exhausting having to be around my narc mother, I feel burnt out from every interaction with her 😩
@@Bea_Rosy are mothers supposed to drain us like that or make us feel ill when around?
For me, I thought that was normal.
Years ago I stopped hugging her goodbye, it felt forced and for show.
I told myself she wasn’t an affectionate person (and she’s not), but at the same time when I did stop that, I felt better.
Yet I hug my adult kiddos every chance I get.
@@Melissa_John3_16 No it shouldn’t be like that, but it took me til my 20’s to realise it wasn’t normal behaviour! Then when I had my daughter I realised how completely messed up the relationship and behaviour was, I would never ever do or say the things my mother did to me to my daughter. She’s in her 80’s now, I thought she might get less toxic but if anything it’s worse! The constant emotional blackmail that she might pass away any day, and I’ll regret not doing whatever the thing is she wants me to do at that moment!
Acceptance that he was a narcissist was the cornerstone for me to be able to reset my boundaries, re-define who I am and who I ultimately want to be. ❤
Trying to communicate and be heard repeatedly over long periods of time is truly exhausting. It makes you need it even more too
I lived with a narcissist for 30 years. 30 YEARS!!! It got to a point that it affected me not only psychologically, mentally and emotionally, but physically. I have now tremors that are a constant reminder of what I and my kids went through. It was exhausting. I am a newborn Christian and tried everything to make our marriage work, but obviously, nothing worked. I have been separated for almost 2 years and until now I am starting to heal. I am very grateful to Dr. Ramani. So clear and right to the point. It has helped me to understand and get closer to my true self.
I'm so sorry. I've been with mines for 3 years and I'm over it. It's more than exhausting it's demonic he's a straight demon!!
27yrs married to Mr Narcissist. I think bc the Lord loves me and I know it and rest in that, He has kept me. Little by little God has revealed to me things that my husband would do and eventually, after learning of Dr Ramani, I was able to put a name on it. Manipulation is the sin of witchcraft. When I had my back prayed for, there were about 4 different preachers tell me someone was working witchcraft on me. By Gods grace, I finally figured it out. I told my “Christian husband” he’s working witchcraft on me and God sees it. He refuted some, but I stood my ground in Jesus. He told me to stop telling him that, and I told him to stop with guilt trips and intimidation. God sees all and He is not happy about this. He eased off quite a bit! I don’t receive that garbage anymore and guess what? My back has not hurt me since.
I don't feel personalities stay the same, as in lifelong. I think abuse changes a person. There are so many people realizing in their 50's, after their children are adults and they are now caring for their elderly parents.
Thank you for dedicating so much to help us understand.
We need to know where we stand in order to be able to decide what move to make next. This is very helpful. Thank you
Even the smallest of conversations with a narc is pain.....I was constantly on egg shells and used to wonder what if in future he leave because they lack empathy.....they drag matters like drop of a hat for days ....few days back in Child support case he said something so awful that I had to react and when I looked at him I saw he was literally watching me that yes he still can control me and I felt strange ...I felt so evil of him ...they study you ...I was stonewalling him from months and he pinched me so bad and got his supply ...
to be educated on narcissism is healing; it also is a cause for great frustration of having so much knowledge and not share what I know with the narc siblings who I always was close to and "shared all"....feels like being a betrayer just like I was betrayed....I want to walk away in my advancing age because I want rest, not exhaustion or play nice. I am done. I just want done...Hail Mary I am full of Grace. I want to concentrate on my survival as their grandiosity is toxic to be around.
"Do I need to slap you around for you to notice that I'm angry at you?". A partner didn't say this to me, my highschool bestie did. I realize I'm a narcissist magnet, having been raised by one.
Sounds like this was being said to that teen...
Dr Ramani, it feels like you've traveled through narcissism purgatory and collected nuggets of wisdom to share with the rest of us who stumble through our own versions of hell. And THAT'S love.
I'm currently a resident therapist and your sessions help me heal and understand my own wounds AND support my clients even more.
I also want to say maintaining healthy boundaries with some of my narcissistic loved ones HURTS. And I have to remind myself continuously that the temporary pain and guilt I feel now is so much better than the pain and resentment I'd feel if I sacrifice myself AGAIN to appease selfish entitled behavior.
You are a diamond and your service (especially as an introvert!!!!) is a timeless blessing.
Dr Ramani, you present info in such a clear & applicable way! Thanks❣️
No l absolutely agree with you!
I see it exactly as you do.
And as an Empath, l had to do the inner work to change.
I didn't change who l am, l simply grew and evolved over time and learnt to understand what I was dealing with and changed how l dealt with them.
Understanding them and toxic behaviours in general gives you more control through educating yourself.
And yes, l do call them out and l don't allow them to point the finger back at me by keeping calm and telling them to stay on topic which is their behaviour and what they did.
I won't waver, nor explain myself when they try to bring up something that has nothing to do with the issue at hand.
Learning to have strong boundaries is key in dealing with these individuals.
In the end they either storm off, left dumb founded or simply change the subject.
Do you have any tips for getting good at setting boundaries? I’m an empath too and have been working on it for a couple years now and have only made a little progress
I highly recommend that you pick up the book Boundaries by Drs Cloud and Townsend - it changed, and probably saved my life
UTube Terri Cole's work on boundaries...Awesome!@@mckaylamacrae5796
@@mckaylamacrae5796
Hi...
The truth is, progress takes time.
However, how much time is all dependant on the inner work you do on yourself and the various areas you accumulate knowledge in.
It adds to your learning and understanding.
It's like a Jigsaw puzzle, you gather different elements of knowledge along the way, nuggets of wisdom per say.
You take understanding from it, but don't yet see the big picture.
But one day, as you continue to gather knowledge (and you're the one who needs to seek out this knowledge) you come across something that speaks to you and it allows you to have a better understanding of everything else you've been educating yourself on.
You now are able to clearly see all the pieces of the puzzle with clarity.
They all make sense and come together clearly within your mind.
For me, l wasn't aware of all the information out there and youtube videos such as Dr Ramani.
I simply came from a disfuntional family and couldn't understand why my family members would exhibit certain behaviours.
I wanted authentic, trusting and loving, non shallow relationship's with my siblings. To experience the same love and support l extended to them my entire life.
And of course along the way, l experienced partners with toxic behaviours.
As a deep and analytical person, l decided l would no longer continue to live and allow toxicity to rein in my life.
My soul and spirit were saying No More.
This was not what healthy looked like.
But you don't know where to start or even what you're looking for.
What l knew was l needed to seek out knowledge and understanding.
I still remember nearly two decades back the words seek out family dynamics came to mind.
I began to Google and google and from one search gaining knowledge that led me to another.
And so on and so on.
I began studying in different areas of psychology, that would help me understand other areas.of my life, that l wasn't seeking.
That helped me understand more and more.
Not only about my experiences but learning to understand myself and what l needed to work on.
Changes l needed to make, and it wasn't easy!
Some of us are born Empaths, some are created through circumstances (family dynamics) can play a huge role.
Or it can be a combination.
The discovery of your childhood experiences and how you grew up plays a major role in learning to understand yourself.
This leads to learning about weak and strong boundaries and more so, understanding yourself and the work needed to be healthier within yourself.
You can educate yourself from RUclips video's, and listen to various different educator's.
Everyone brngs something different to the table.
I don't regret the year's it took me to learn everything l hear now in RUclips video's if l feel.compelled to listen.
It simply confirms the inner work l did on my own seeking.to gain understanding and grow from it in Life.
I hope some of what l share is of help.
Remember that the biggest investment you can make is to know yourself.
This allows you to change what needs to change, grow, and mature along the way to becoming the best version of yourself.
That leads to contentment and it's a journey.
Good luck and l wish you well.
Keep listening to various educator's.
What l love about Dr Ramani is how authentic, transparent and leaves ego at the door.
She's relatable, and allows her viewer's to know they're not alone as she too understands coming from her own experiences.
Another woman who is amazing at helping people grow is Joyce Meyer.
She's a practical common sense Bible teacher.
You don't need to be a Christian to listen to this woman.
Because of my own understandings, l know and understand this women has a vast knowledge on all areas of life through her own sufferings.
Narcissism is one of them, she simply doesn't use the world's but expresses certain behaviours that you gain an understanding from a different angle when she speaks.
Listening to her teachings will help you on your self discovery if you stick with it.
It's food for the Soul. 🙏
I am so lucky. 2 years ago when we started the process of fostering and ultimately adopting our troubled daughter, my Husband realized his narcissistic tendencies.
He has since devoted much of his effort towards overcoming his behaviors towards me and our adult children.
I knew he was working on himself but didn't know in all ways. Since I found your channel, I was showing him a video about identifying traits, many of which I see forming in our adopted daughter from the abuse and neglect she received before she came to us. He was verbally identifying the markers and traits he saw in himself. I'm a high empath, highly agreeable, and have made it work for 28 years with him.
I've not confronted him but have received all the classic abuse forms from him. Most of the time, i focus on "his imbalance isn't my imbalance." And allow it to slide off, refocusing myself on our kids.
I truly feel I'm one of they lucky ones, and then I think about it. I'm not lucky. I created this reality to be my own with my gentle, unrelenting love and devotion. Our adult kids are affected but not as afflicted as they could have been. I choose to accept this as a victory.
22:55 exactly! I did this. I asked, please tell when you stopped liking me as a person to do these things. (Gaslight, dismiss my invisible disability, emotional neglect) ...crickets, he gave an angry stare and pursed lips.
The argument ended me leaving for the night. A few times that happened. A lot of the time i was up for more than 24 hrs at a time, because the abuse from him was worsening. He was baiting, trample boundaries , gaslighting me every day (compounded & contemptuous baiting for 3 hours every morning before he left for work), pushing me to frustration and anger. Finally, he did a diabolical event. Then i went no contact.
I experienced confusion and even asked him for help.
Seriously, Dr. RAMANI would recieve a nobel if she looked into my current situation.
It really helped when I realized the narcissist's behavior doesn't have anything to do with ny value as a person. Her behavior is HER behavior.
That’s an excellent idea. I know for a fact my husband would say, you want to be in control. You’re the control freak. I don’t have to answer to you about why I spend money on myself. You just want it to be all about you. You’re greedy you want the money for yourself. I have experienced this. My mind was foggy, so it didn’t completely sink in. Especially, because he did say I was the Narcissist. So I do have to be aware that radical acceptance is my neighbor right there. Now I have to take it as it is. By the way, he doesn’t have an income. I support everything financially. He lives for free. If he does earn money in some way with a task, he believes that’s his money. He doesn’t have to give his money away to contribute to our household utilities or mortgage.
May I ask you why you are accepting this situation?
My mom was just like your husband. Dad’s income was “theirs” and her babysitting money was “hers.” After she died, we found small amounts of money hidden all over the house. Can’t take it with you…
Sounds like my ex brother-in-law
I have been applying that "narcissistic communication cave" theory lately . I sort of stumbled into the idea.. it's been both super depressing ( to see clearly they'll never ever change ) plus informative to develope a strategy for dealing with the unavoidable ( it's a parent ) family dynamics. Now it's totally clear and I have no unrealistic expectations . It is what it is. It's like they're sort of a ghost I never knew and never really will.
Yea communication is a popular topic in couple's therapy and my ex latched on to that. Whenever I tried to discuss other relationship problems such as passive aggressive behaviors, lying and cheating she would change the subject to "We need to communicate more." We spent a lot of time talking about talking. When I pressed the other issues she would then stonewall. So much for we need to communicate more.
Well thank you Doc!!! It’s bittersweet because I am taking the high road to sustain our relationship!! You have given such amazing advice and I’m so grateful for it!!! I’m this morning at the eggshells!!!….even bought a one way flight out of town to visit my kids because of his reckless abuse. However, I must have a strong trauma bond with him because I can’t let him go!!! Was thinking of dropping him off to you for a few weeks LOL!!! Anyway I believe I’ve set some boundaries now because I’m leaving without him but I’m still married and I do wish it could be fairytale life! I have come to the raw conclusion that if I want to continue that I have to accept his crazy behavior or ideas but I’m strong enough to clearly claim my boundaries!!! I’m going to take your prescription medication advice you just gave and go with it!!! Please pray for us too!!! I want him to find God like I have!!! Blessings and many thanks for your monumental efforts to help the community trying to survive and stay healthy in the narcissist world!!! Don’t know how I really would do this without you!!!! Thanks 😊
Wow! I’m now VERY inspired to stay calm. Thank you!
Thank you!
This is 5 star information!
This would be useful to high school students in an auditorium! Let them know! I wish I could save this and print it out.
Thanks again!
Final hearing in the family court with Narcky Narc.....we won
Thank you for all your work
I have been doing this for 29 years and am emotionally exhausted!! I have changed my life to be what he expects me to be. Nothing is good enough
I have learned so much from you, Dr. Ramani. There's an awful person in my HOA who has sent me hostile email, and I've documented her messages for two years along with my replies. It would be evidence for a psychological study on projection, manipulation, and antagonistic behavior. I'm still affected by her words, but I can re-regulate faster than I usually did. My neutrality in responding has made this person go to great lengths to get me upset. I will remain serene and calm in my Gray Rock replies to her. I wish I could completely ignore her.
I absolutely love not reacting (neutrality) to a narcissist like you speak of. Makes them furious because you aren't the narcissistic supply they so desperately need. They just try harder to get the response they want. Kudos to you. I did that to my 2 sisters even as young kids. I just didn't react. Made them nuts as they had not honed their narcissistic traits at that time. Now I just go full on no contact.
Someone I know had to get a restraining order against her HOA board member (who is a retired cop 👮🏻 L🤣L). Doesn’t look so great on one’s record.
I may have to do this. Thanks for the thought.@@KiKiQuiQuiKiKi
HOAs suck.
Brilliant compilation. I especially appreciate the reminders on strategically using clear communication as a test for narcissism. You are so good at this, Dr. Ramani! I'll be watching this one again and again.
Thank you! Yes tried it all so that makes me trauma bonded which finally was broken by the ultimate problem that I could not fix! I was discarded both times and all these years later I love it! Thank God! ❤
First, I wouldn't like myself if I changed. Being an off the scale extrovert who is very agreeable I like me. But, also being a fighter by nature I employed the age old concept of reverse psychology on my late husband and it worked quite well when used. I realized early on that if I responded to him the way he responded to me it threw him off center. It was fun watching him try to figure out what just happened? But then I got tired of that and just started implementing activities which did not include him. For what it was worth it got me through to the end. I've always been painfully independent so it is easy for me to fly solo. When at home I relish the solitude. When in public I embrace and enjoy interaction.
Good advice. It always works to copy and send back the same style of communication to the narc. Or to the complainer. Complain and whine worse or bigger than they do every now and then. It shuts them up for weeks at a time. Surprises and de-stabilizes them. They rely on your strength and confidence.... If you make it seem shaky... They back off. If you are not a basically self-knowledgeable and co fide t person this might be hard to do. Reverse psychology really works. You need to know you are living with the enemy. What do you to protect yourself against a virus? Employ same analysis to a person-virus or energy-vampire. Strategy. Use it.
😂 love your humor on the obvious and helping us to realize what is bad for our health and what is not good thank you ❤️
Even if you were a clairvoyant and could actually read their mind they would be angered by your presumption of knowing and trying to avoid the fight.
They would just move the goalpost. "Yes, you did this thing right this time, but you didn't do *new thing we never talked about*"
this is a great education for me my neighbour who gas lights me and harrases me with noise through the walls every night for ten months
I’m one of those Agreeable People. That relative has created so much pain for family. They even denied my MS, and I felt I had to Prove it to them! It’s largely an invisible disease, but I’m disabled from it. Thanks for helping me become more savvy about this awful personality!
Now to change the mindset from defeated resignation to radical acceptance...
Yes-@me! The former only punishes ourselves.
It would be uncomfortable and draining to not be introverted. It would also bring up some social anxiety issues I’m working on that one. I completely agree it would be hard to change.
If I acted like a Narcissist, I would feel guilty, terrible, and sad. There’s a line about being agreeable. Healthy boundaries are a priority.
"Me, cat, TV, take-in---I'm golden"---I love that you said that lol. I'm also an introvert---I have mad people skills but they are just skills. Total introvert
When she says “ Dr Ramani is High !” 😂❤, I had to watch this video twice to fully understand the strategy 😊 Thank you Dr Ramani , I learn how to protect myself while I’m still living with my husband of 31 years , Discovered he is a narcissist about 21/2 years ago by watching Dr Ramani’s videos
Wow! So much in this compilation! I did not say the words”just tell me what to say” but I often found myself saying “I am NOT a mind reader. I don’t have this skill and never will”. I also tried so many different ways of “talking”. - nothing worked. It got to the point that I just reacting became my norm and then that was used against me because I was such an angry person.
I said the same!!! He was mad at me saying I was invalidating him for the consequences of his neglectful behaviour, silent treatment and triangulation, he even said I was mean and invalidating through my body language (after he said he HAD to go with me to an event I was sooo excited to go, and telling me to not to expect much from him) and I got sad, right after he said I was punishing him for his honesty. I told him Thank you for being honest and also gave him an apology, I asked him to tell me his needs and that I will do my best to meet them. He went to silent treatment for 4 days and then discarded me. It was really confusing. One week before this I asked him if I was meeting his needs, that I really wanted it to work out from a loving way. It is helpless. They will even take your words and project their actions on you to throw them back at your face and get away with their hands clean playing the victim.
I am sorry for both of us. No one deserves this treatment. What you say sounds so familiar. Take care - sending you a big hug!
You're right on point!! It's like you lived in my house when I listen to you. It's been very difficult because I just ended a twelve year relationship with someone like this. And it's still difficult because I have to deal with them because we have a shared child. It's a difficult time in my life. But thank you so much for your videos they been helping me get through. 🙏🏾💚💯
I felt like I had to be a mind reader my entire childhood and nearly all of my adulthood. Went LC and doing some much better 😊
The first few minutes of this video helped me a ton. That's a huge realization. INFJ here.