Social Anxiety - 6 Tips from a Navy SEAL
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- Опубликовано: 17 авг 2019
- 6 Tips to help get over Social Anxiety from a former Navy SEAL and CIA Contractor.
Find ways to boost your confidence and do not put yourself into a situation that you can not get yourself out of. These 2 categories will help you overcome social anxiety.
#VIGILANCEELITE #SHAWNRYANSHOW
Vigilance Elite/Shawn Ryan Links:
Website - www.vigilanceelite.com/
Instagram - / shawnryan762
- / vigilanceelite
Facebook - / shawnryan762
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Twitter - / vigilanceelite
Linked In - / shawn-ryan-84b97314a
Mental health is becoming mainstream and I LOVE it, especially critical for men to talk about this!
Thank you 🙏🏻
Anxiety since 1972.. Just remember there is always an exit sign in your mind , you need not explain ANYTHING to others , Money I have had and not had . It Does not define you , just be you .. people that are more like minded always help whatever hobby you may find . We live in this competitive environment . Shrug it off , no one said you had to be part of the rat race . Drinking is not even good for you .. I am glad you walked from it . You sound like you are a nice person and doing great ! God bless .
We ALL have it to a degree. We are all on “the spectrum”
Yeah, my friend ended up being a statistic. It sucks.
@@ronalexander4955 I came just a day away from it. My brother approached me and opened my eyes to the fact that I had been avoiding it out of fear for many many years and that it was time to accept help. He didn't know it at the time but in that moment he had just saved my life.
The fact that him and his Fiance have a safe word/sentence for his social anxiety in certain settings and events...is fucking awesome. She sounds like a keeper
My husband and I have safe words too, for my PTSD
I’ve never heard of safe words for anxiety & PTSD.. that’s a good idea.
@@MrBigChops the safe words are colors red - I need to leave and stop the current activity now, yellow- this bothers me I need coping mechanisms, blue- I'm going to switch to an alter to handle the situation, green - I'm ok
Jmom Rodgers • Thank you 🙏🏼
Jmom Rodgers • What do you mean by “ switch to an alter” and what are some of the coping methods?
This guy is an international hero to all introverts
He is 2nd to the great Buckethead.
Having social anxiety isn’t synonymous with being introverted
@Player Hater I'm Aware of things that were done. I Fully support the actions! You're way off track!
@Player Hater why do you think they've done wrong to Americans? There's nothing to substantiate that.
@Player Hater if that were true nobody would be working for the cia and definitely wouldn't care about non disclosure agreements. at the very top yah maybe there is people that are in the elite who do those things all I know is if I was ever asked to do those things I would refuse and most likely kill them as 99% would too. don't believe in all the qanon stuff its a psy op. if trump was fighting against these people and it was indeed the cia he could disband the cia but he hasn't. why is that?
A lot of men suffer silently. This video was a big help for me.
So glad you got some help from this!
I've been getting nausea and lots of really strong adrenaline feelings in my stomache. I don't like taking meds but I just took one. I've had before where I would feel anxiety in public for no apparent reason and then something bad would happen like a sixth sense also
I agree. I was never in the military though. I grew up in a rough place. So I'm used to sad mad and crooked people. I try to stay silent until I can't.
@@derekstaroba I know the feeling. It is almost debilitating. The surge of adrenaline in almost any social encounter makes me say the dumbest shit. I then think about what I said for the rest of the day or week. That's what I hate the most about it all.
Can your local doctor help you?
I find it kind of fascinating and a little comforting that someone as highly trained and peak human as a navy SEAL goes through a lot of the same things that I go through in social situations. Thank you for sharing this.
It makes it more comfortable for regular people like us that people in higher levels of life suffer similar issues
People forget we are all people. Our careers, futures, past, is just what makes us and sometimes we all forget that. Status is just what society says about us. Our hearts, bodies, brains and souls all work the same regardless if someone has no money or all the fame, we are all the same.
@@jonathancristobal4724 agree we all have same issues how we got there may be different the end is the same ,like the point of not needing to talk ,but listen see what happens ,yes keeping hands busy ,I use to drink really heavy in my early years ,I will have a beer only at special events other then that no booze .
I was thinking the same thing, makes me feel better about myself knowing someone of this caliper feels intimidated by anyone. Thank you for sharing.
That’s just your insecurities. Seals are just people. You too, could be a seal, assuming you don’t have physical problems, if that’s what you wanted to do.
Ive found myself becoming more isolated, not because I’m anti-social. I just want to be left alone because my bullshit meter is getting smaller with age.
I know what you're saying, as I've listened to people like him I have dropped 90% of my 'friends' because of how full of bullshit he helped me realized they are. I'd much rather have 3 friends I can trust, than 100 friends I can't trust.
I’m glad he’s using his platform to do this, though. Y’all stay safe.
@Solid Snake just don’t let it run your life bro. Adjustments. Leverage it and use it to your advantage. I’m perfectly ok not wanting to socialize with most people. Keep your circle small and tight. There’s a reason 4 people make a fire team 😂 My buddy killed himself a few years back. Sad thing is he didn’t reach out to anyone. He was just done, his wife and kids will never be the same. Never quit. Ever.
💯 I’m the same way. Can’t deal with all the bs and listening to all the backstabbing. I just don’t wanna hear it. My circle is small and just keeps getting smaller.
Amen man. Feel exactly the same
My life got much easier when I stopped thinking there was something wrong with me for being introverted and preferring solitude. I stopped trying to fight it and make excuses for my actions and just accepted who I was. If others don't I really dont care anymore its too exhausting.
absolutely.. silence is golden.
Same. I just stay mindful of not being the asshole unless I must. Works great.
"What do you do for a living?" I always found this to be a rude question... cause I know it's people's way of trying to find what "box" to put you in.
It’s the height of conversational laziness.
Usually it's women who ask me that, at parties, and I always think they want to know how much money I make.
@@jeffiekrugermann5501 That’s because they are asking that.
@@fcarjule there’s a reason people think MJ is attractive. When you get 400, 500 million it makes you handsome
I tell people ‘as little as possible.’
"I had no hobbies other than drinking". It takes alot to talk about this. Respect.
There was a time I would drink a whole bottle of Rum in one evening...
This resonates with me so much. Always feel like I gotta be doing some shit (hobby-wise) just to prove my existence.
Potential alcoholic behavior
@@dbix11 no no no. absolute alcoholic behavior.
That's me
Dude you probably helped thousands of people with this video.
Common Sence he definitely did!
I believe that.
Common Sence / l have too much respect for you to say Dude you helped so many through making this video . I will say thanks for the shout out
Common Sence I love the long neck npc from tucker Carlson lol
I hope you’re right.
I’m almost entirely crippled from anxiety. It’s just shear will power that gets me to my car to go to work, let alone walk into work. I work at an airport.. I avoid people as much as possible. I almost never go out outside of work unless it’s a park with my girlfriend. When someone so much as even looks at me, particularly people I know nothing about, my body goes cold, anxiety turns to fear and fear to some anger. My head goes down. I think about how much they hate me and what I’m insecure about. Honestly, By the end of the work day, I get home (I live alone) and sit in bed and breathe. I think to myself that I’m genuinely surprised I even made it through the day.
One day I’ll have a small cabin in the woods with a creek going through my property. I’ll do nothing but paint, build things, draw and play my guitar. Those are the things that make me happy and feel good most of the time. Especially my guitar.
sounds like you need some weed in your life lmao, but i agree i have a little social anxiety and hate it. almost everybody struggles with some form of it but in this day and age, damn near everybody is fake and tries to act like someone there not. you just gotta see through it
*sheer will power
Do you like to write your own songs?
You’re not by yourself brother. Praying for you 🙏. It’s a battle everyday but stay strong don’t give up.
You sound like a bitch tbh lol someone looks at you and get scared? I understand wanting to avoid ppl but still lol
Every now and then i come back to this video. To an introverted big guy this is so relatable. Thanks brother.
Yeah I would luv to hear Shawn speak on this in a couple months after his psychedelic & Dmt experience really works on him & his ego..it changes lives..but sometimes not forever...
Idk man. I think "I'm a Navy SEAL" is enough to win the What Do You Do game
Thats the thing these guys think that people have a million different opinions. You walk into a room and suddenly everyone thinks you are something you might not be. Imagine that at the level of : Ive killed people with my bare hands in situations that are so classified and privileged that only 20 people on the planet knew you were there. This shit cant be oversimplified. I feel for these folks.
@@terrypeterson5707 true
As a doctor a guarantee he would be the most interesting person at any of our 'parties'. I would love to hear an anesthesiologist bitching about getting 5% less from medicare this year, only to have this guy interrupt with an anecdote about his service - a time when he was in acute danger. Now I'm going to fantasize about this scenario for years.
@@Theiliteritesbian I can somewhat relate to that. People complain so much for nothing. But I guess that everyone has their own problems
How
I never thought I would hear a SEAL say he had social anxiety disorder like I do. It looks like we actually are all in this boat together.
Gary W-l-o-t navy seals are people to
good pun there
You are fucking dumb
AngryBoy ok angry boy
I was, hopefully you can over come it
I find it weird how he’s intimidated by doctors, lawyers, stockbrokers, and so on, but he’s a Navy seal. Navy Seals are the most badass and respected profession I can think of
There's probably an "I can kill everyone in this fucking room" component to it.
That's ironically how my normie ass deals with social anxiety. "Go ahead, make my day". I haven't had a proper knock-down-drag-out fight since the fourth grade. Fuckin' shameful.
@@scowler7200 it's not shameful dude do what you gotta bro to be happy. I haven't got into a serious fight since 11th grade and in the over 30 fights I got into I only won a small number of them. Lmao don't be afraid of these people do you. I'm not afraid bro lose a fight or even die for that matter so I say what I want because I accept the consequences
@@devinwatkins8953
I just wanna kick someone's ass, clap someone else's cheeks.
It's just fish out of water and not being able to relate. If it was a super rich stockbroker in a room of Navy Seals the stockbroker would prob feel intimidated too just cuz he wouldn't know what to talk about or how to act
Unfortunately, not everyone really knows what they do, or respects their service.
“Which is why I bought a place right in the middle of fucking nowhere” -Every Introverts Dream
Yes. I want at least 20 acres of "get off my property"
Lifelong dream of mine to live out in isolated but nice looking areas. Have a bunch of land to ride my dirtbike, go hunting, go for trail runs, etc.
Maybe one day. . .
@@johnsoapmactavish9921 I'm not on a maybe, just working for it
@@johnsoapmactavish9921 one day you will get your dream. I finally got the land/dirt bike thing solved so far. Just need a bitch or nice woman to complete it. Stay strong 💪 I am still too.
I have the land now - for 8yrs & some issues still remain. The way our Brother just opened up his chest cavity is … a hella Lot Better than the “suck it up buttercup” - or “have you gone soft?!”. Just stab me in the jugular if you saying something…. So hardcore cliche’
I got my Dogs. Wish I had a Vern. No decent “therapy” when you’re near off grid.
So I try to turn to God & occasionally…. Alikes online.
Hell yeah I’ve left a cart of groceries behind before. Ok Nuff about me. 🇺🇸
Dead silent at a dinner party:
Me: this is my favorite song.
Nathan Summers I died laughing, I have major social anxiety but this actually made feel a little better. Thank you.
Lol absolutely my friend. Too close to home that i couldn’t help but laugh
IT ME.
😂😂😂
Lol I don’t get it
I have zero military background (just a normal shmuck) and this helped me so much. Social anxiety is social anxiety, plain and simple. This dude is legit
Nick I’m glad it helped.
With you Nick. No military experience. Work in EMS. Stumbled on this video by accident and damn. Shawn, Thank you.Respect, Sir....
Military or not we are all Americans and we need to help each other out. No such thing as a normal shmuck. Anxiety is a hard mofo to deal with.
I was about to make the same comment. I’ve had social anxiety all my life and I don’t even think it’s really social anxiety I just hate being around people these days.
I turned 45 this past August; ten years later after being finally diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome. My life before that was a losing battle trying to become a normal college graduate and gaining secure employment. My anxiety was not the only problem which had got only worse with shit state of our state job market, the substandard stone aged resources a community college that during the time my attendance was terrible. TERRIBLE.
NOW after learning what monkey was on my back was, things have slowly gotten better. Thank you Shawn for this video! My best to you and your fiance. Be well.
Thank you for this video. I leaned heavily on drugs and alcohol after I transitioned out of the Marine Corps. I spent 10 years dealing with addition/alcoholism on top of PTSD, clinical depression, and social anxiety. I ended up getting help and going to treatment. I'm 37 days sober and I couldn't be happier.
Remember how shitty you felt. You brain will try and forget it.
How are you doing 2 years later?
"just fuckin leave" this guy is so genuine lmfao i love it
He’s real unlike most of these fake people you see now a days
The only time I don’t have social anxiety is around the boys. Even around my relatives I have social anxiety
Same, I thought I was just loosing my shit for no reason.
My relatives are expecting me to get a wife and make children. How the fuuck am I suppose to do all that shiit when I can't even speak to people? I'm a disappointment...
I feel you bro
My social anxiety is so fuckin bad that I can barely even speak to friends I’ve known for years the only reason they’re still cool with me is because they are dealing with the same shit
Yo felt this so much same exact situation.
“You dont always have to talk”
That fits into so many aspects of life, wish more people utilized that kind of thinking.
@islanti and your probably that guy that constantly talks and doesnt know when to shut the fuck up either.
Aaron I can relate to this so much. I learned that people will not always remember your stories but will always remember your personality. How you’re put together and so on. Rather than the words you necessarily say!
@islanti The world's boring and lonely when everyone talks for the sake of talking not when they have something to say.
islanti more boring if everyone was the same....chatty, quiet, etc. I like different and interesting with depth. What I hate most about social functions? Mindless talk, small talk, and boasters.....it’s so shallow it pisses me off. Then again, ignorant comments like yours piss me off even more than that.
I am very social. Two of my children are not, and I can tell they recent it! So, to improve their comfort zone, while their around, I dial it way back! Their favorite saying is, “Mom nobody cares”, lol. I’ve come to realize, they are right! People are so consumed in their own problems and daily life they really don’t have much left over to care about anyone else! So my kids are right! Lesson learned from my children! One of the many!💞
“Be anxious over nothing, but in everything, through prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, make your requests known to God.”
Philippians 4.
Amen ! 🙏✝️
You definitely are helping so many that suffer from this in silence.
the average person would think SEALs are all super confident no matter what. Thanks for a new perspective
Jesse Rose the average human is fucking stupid then. Seals are humans, they might be stronger physically or even mentally at a certain aspect but in the end we are all the same
@@ayda2876 You flatter yourself, I would love to see how you're doing after 47 seconds in a haji torture chamber (enough time for them to get a couple nails off). That should give us all the info we need to debunk your theory on all humans being the same, apart from our basic biological composition.
@@bdf2660 LMFAO STFU there is no way u're more than 15 years old
@@ayda2876 Yes yes resort to insults... I guarantee that seal wouldn't have reacted the silly way you just did when proven incorrect. So again, apart from basic biological composition we are not all the same, but be my guest, keep proving my point.
@@bdf2660 get help.
If someone told me at a party “I was in the CIA and SEALS but can’t talk about it” I’d spend the rest of the night speculating on what they did. That’s the coolest shit ever.
international man of mystery
Killing mostly, they do alot of killing usually in Areas of the world we aren't supposed to be in.
The majority of people I have met who talk about it didn’t do it . Real bad asses don’t blab on generally , a few do but most don’t . I DESPISE talking to people who talk about military or certain experiences when it’s so obvious they haven’t been part of it .
No not really. There are many things we are not supposed to see. There is complete evil. Unfortunately I have seen it. And it can't be unseen.
Since when was the CIA cool? They're involved in the deaths of countless innocents.
I'm just a truck driver and I've always been kind of ashamed that I feel the way I feel. And hearing that not only is it affecting me but it affects someone of your stature really helps me realize that this is totally out of my control and then I shouldn't be ashamed. I've never seen you or your channel but man I really appreciate this video
It is totally in your control you just need to be taught how to handle yourself.
America wouldn't be shit without truckers. Your not just a trucker. Your keeping America going and needs/wants stocked. We can't live one day without truckers. Too many would die.
You're not *just* a trucker. Truckers are vital to the functioning of our society. And you're also a person with thoughts, feelings, emotions, interpersonal relationships, and value well beyond your career status.
I don't do anything and i don't care, anyone that works look responsible enough to me
Believe it or not, this channel and this man give me great comfort even though I'm a middle aged woman civilian. I went through 23 years of domestic abuse and have c-ptsd from it. Shawn, you help me. Thank you and God bless you and your loved ones always 💕🕊️👑⚔️🛡️
He talks about these “badass” lawyers, doctors, and stock brokers. Dude you were a navy SEAL who worked for the CIA. You are infinitely more badass than them.
It's a different kind of bad ass he's referring to.
Apparently not.
It's because a lot of people don't, A. Respect military anymore. Therefore having zero concept of what he went through and did. B. Only focus on money and civilian accreditation aka colleges to determine openness to establish a relationship on a deeper level. C. Civilians take offense easily, especially successful ones because to become successful for them, they kissed alot of ass. So finding a mutual expression/understanding in conversion is paramount to creating bonds to civilians. This is my opinion and personal experience. And the sad part is, I'm not even a combat veteran. Im a maintenance guy who still sees and deals with the disconnect between civilians and veterans. I have found strength and self confidence in being drawn to combat veterans in a random crowd. I throughly gain happiness and fulfillment uplifting struggling individuals and making them not feel so alone. While also not feeling alone myself. Veterans seeking out veterans in a civilian crowd is the best source of support and healing
@@rayman1230 "Civilians", makes military guys sound like cock suckers who kissed their leaders and higher-ups asses.
@@MoarteaLunii Maybe its because "they" are the ones who kill anything thqat moved, when given orders to do so. Clearly you have no experience.
"Nothing bad will happen if you lay off the booze." TRUTH! It took me a lot of years to figure that one out.
@Hammer_of_creation Cheers! ha ha
"Nothing bad will happen if you lay off the booze." a very simple statement, thanks for that, I have heard alot of advice and stuff to help with a drinking problem. That one kinds sticks, Thanks again!!!!!!!!
Here here. Fuck alcohol and drugs. Life is so much more fulfilling without.
robert f Thats true ! I dont mess with spirits anymore ...
Measure this 'nothing' so it can have a rationale here please.
I used to have really bad social anxiety when I was younger, now Ive gotten way way better. I hope you all overcome it, best of luck.
Agoraphobia is what it seems he's describing. Always been this way but as i hit 30 it got much worse. I hated talking to people about my job (mechanic) since i was so unhappy with it. I'd walk into stores and would feel the crushing weight on me. Suddenly driving would give me panic attacks. I used to love driving cars and now i'm freaking out? What the hell. I don't know why it suddenly got worse but its been a few years of me getting back to a normal state. Relationships suffer. Anxiety turns to anger. Everything he said has been what i've been doing for years and it certainly helps. Hang in there guys and know you're not alone.
Ah man I’m sorry to hear that, I think mechanic work is freakin sick..nothin to be ashamed of bro. If you feel insecure it’s only because you know you should be something you aren’t, try working out if you don’t already, huge confidence gains. Hope you are doin well brotha.
Person: "Hi"
Me: "I don't have a f*cking clue what you are talking about"
hhahahahahahahah
Lmao this is so true from my personal experience because I’m kinda retarded
Person: Hi
Me: what do you want from me?!?
Person: "Hey, want a beer?"
Me: "I don't have a clue what the f*ck you're talking about."
😂😆😂🎖
The water running in the background is so damn relaxing.
echotherapy
I had to piss twice just watching this
Never apologize for who you are, as you're the most interesting person in the room. You have rare skills and knowledge that would curl the toes of the ordinary person. You've lived a life unlike others.
I find this amazing. Having someone with his title, discussing such a vulnerable subject is what we need to help those who think it’s not okay to feel what they feel. The most difficult part of mental illness is the isolation and this video shows that we aren’t alone in the fight to making the world a little safer for people with mental illness.
I’d be 100x more impressed if someone told me they were a Navy SEAL rather than a doctor, lawyer or stockbroker
@John P There is plenty of things he can talk about being a Seal. Granted it can't be about specific missions, but there is plenty to talk about.
1000x more*
No doubt
Why u need those other people to work i hate when people constantly talk out if there ass about SEALS yes u need them in parts but there not fucking Martyr’s there just people and becoming a doctor is still impressive just because u fight in wars for your country doesn’t make u any more impressive than other professional people
No shit.
My code phrase is “I want to leave because I hate everyone here.”
hahahah same mate!
Same! Id rather be at home by myself than be surrounded by prententious crowd i don’t like
SlayCityUSA exactly for me it’s more like “how are people this interested in this crap😂, Im out this piece”
C lmfao people nowadays just care about their image on social media lmfao
Damn fuckn straight. 99.9% of the time is a family gettogether.
“Don’t put yourself in a situation you can’t get out of “ that’s a good one
I saw this video close to a year ago and forgot, but most of these things I have started doing. Stumbled upon this video again and learned from it a second time.
Happy to hear that.
This is a strong man, admitting you have something like social anxiety is a sign of real strength instead of what a lot of people do which is pretending to be manly and fearless.
So true. He obviously really did "shit can" his ego.
@Mr. X Wayy to completely miss the damn point dude
@Mr. X No, he is saying that a man that admits his fear is brave.
@Mr. X 🤦♂️🤦♂️🤦♂️
Mr. X So in your view straw-manning is a sign of emotional stability. Gotcha.
I see a lot of people saying they don't like talking to people, is there anyone else who doesn't even like to be seen?
Sometimes it is nice just to feel invisible.
After my accident that left me paralyzed from the neck down I didn't like be in public. I was never like that before my accident
I'm sure a lot of people don't but never think of it that way. Being in view of others starts your brain up, because you know they may be judging, making decisions up about who you are and your worth or whatever you don't want them to be thinking. Maybe a lot of people don't want to be seen, but they don't even know it.
@@juniormendoza657 🙏🏼 for ya. I know 2 guys both surfers both now in the same boat. I don't now how but they both found a way. Both smile a lot more than me both talk about being blessed. I honestly have no answers but it looks like people can find them. Like I said I'm 🙏🏼 for you junior ✊🏼
- Vee - I’m one of those people, I’m most comfortable when I just blend into the surroundings
I just stumbled across this - I can only say thank you. Thank you for keeping me and my family safe. The price you and your fellow warriors pay for our freedom.....it's humbling.
Shawn I was not in the military, but spent the last 15 years in active addiction and basically living militant and being a criminal i share the same social anxiety now that I have recovered and living a “normal” life thank you so much for the six tips. And thank you for your service. I’m a huge fan.
Your tip on not always having to talk hit me really hard man. Nothing wrong with being silent in a world that doesn't stop talking. Much love.
I work with a lot of people who like to talk ALL the time... does my head in. They think I don’t have anything to say because I don’t feel the need to talk all the time.
I’ve found a lot of people respect you for it.
@Harry Munker it's definitely easier to listen THAN* talk.
Hear much, say little....
Harry Munker learn to spell dumbass, than*. Simple English buddy
Imagine being a stud SF operator and CIA agent, and being intimidated by Docs and Lawyers. :(
We got you bro. You're a stud in our eyes.
Mike Hale Dude, he spent many years learning a totally different skillset and anytime you are not in your element it is natural to be a bit intimidated. Your assumption that an operator wouldn’t suffer from anxiety is the type of shit that makes people feel embarrassed to talk about it. Because those Boca Raton types are so insecure themselves they spent a lifetime learning to stroke their own ego in social situations and figured out that making other people uncomfortable masks their own anxiety. Imagine how much more intimidated they would be than a SF operator if they saw someone’s head get blown off in a war zone.
@Stephen S. Thank you sir. Inartfuly said on my part, but I meant it with nothing but the utmost respect.
Love your no BS honesty & experience with this.
Deal with all the same shit your taking about, Sound advice man.
I think I speak for us all when I say, this means a lot coming from someone like yourself….
I hate speaking in large groups, my voice goes weak and I get a lump in my throat and I tend to waffle on about all kinds of rubbish. I find myself getting short of breathe or sometimes hold my breath subconsciously. After a bad period of anxiety I get tight chested and bad tension headaches. I hate meeting new people and never know what to say.
I hope this video helps you brother.
You not the only one trust, my hands and feet get sweaty and I start stuttering 🤦🏿♂️
try this works for me "I have anxiety,if i have an attack don't worry,it always passes" people KNOW exactly what i'm talking about,it's very common,and trying to hide it makes it worse. after years of struggles i just said this to a woman barber once and she sighed with relief,put her hands on my shoulders,like an angel,and said aloud "good for you,I have anxiety too" my best haircut ever if u decide to try it,anywhere,anytime,good luck.
I have exactly the same problem. I feel you brotha, hope you find place for yourself.
You know, as someone whose natural state is to be highly extraverted and outgoing, social anxiety is a problem for me. I'm pretty much stuck to saying "hi" to passers by and dressing wild. No real thoughts and feelings being expressed. It tends to make you feel like you're being cucked by "Society", you know?
I wanna be friends with this guy, he seems so blatantly honest and genuine. Not to mention the navy seal background which proves he's worthy of respect even if he isn't racking in millions of dollars. Super cool dude
Matt L'Ecuyer Follow him on IG-and grab some VE gummy bears. You won't be sorry-my friends are getting addicted to them.
Isn't it crazy how all we want from our friends/fam/a partner is for them to be honest, genuine, n respect?
Agree. But man, being a millionaire doesn´t mean you are worthy of respect. People tend to look up to millionaires as if they were gods, but no, they are just ordinary people, some are good some are bad.
Yea that's great that I can hear someone else that copes with same shit
Shawn is as real as they come. His honesty and transparency is rare in today's society. I've got 100% more respect for him than any plastic surgeon, lawyer, or money manger, most of whom are full of their own shit.
Indeed
Because you met MOST people with those professions?
You can respect this guy without making yourself look stupid.
@@YouReallyDontKnow I've met a lot of lawyers and money managers and many of them are indeed full of their own shit... especially the lawyers. Still, everyone can respect and like someone who is straightforward down to earth regardless of what he does for a living. No one likes a pretentious jackass; these types can even be found in the armed forces.
I relate to this so much. It bothers me when people say, “You’re pretty quiet.” I always tell them I’m just being observant.
I appreciate the honesty in this video. I was one of those guys that put up the wall and said I am fine there is nothing wrong with me for my past 34 years with uncle sam. But luckily a battle buddy and fellow rider was my savor and helped me open my eyes and show me a better path and open up to the help out there.
God Bless
Young men need guys like this. He's genuine, doesn't hold back and is a reflection of ourselves... just wiser.
Yup
Even this 43yr old can learn something here
Hell yea
righttt, wish i caould hangout with him. i have horrible anxiety, even around my siblings and parents. sucks
I can't believe all of these comments. So many people feel like i do. It makes me wonder how many people feel this way, who are in the same room with me, when i feel this way. Peace you all of you
Yea, what we all have to realize is we are more similar then different. Everyone has emotion and everyone at some will feel anxiety. I was watching a video on a football player(hillis i think) use to trunk people when running with the ball. One he did just thaf and the other player said that hurt alot. So he come to the conclusions that its not just him or me, but most likely everyone feels pain. Know this is different context be go well.
love u!!! you are not alone in this
@@skrwdUNi and i love you. I'm at my monthly doctors appointment, where i receive some counseling on brain maintenance. He teaches me how the brain works, and why it does what it does. Thank you for your kind comment
@@jimmyp9105 Yessir. My Dr teaches me that we are all connected. When i hurt you, i hurt me. That's mostly true, i suppose. Idk.
A hero and CIA operative gave me a ❤️! Holy shit! My day is made!
Recently started in person classes again in uni-anxiety has gone through the roof, guess being alone for the better part of a year messed me up. Glad I found this video
Thank you for sharing this! So many people are dealing with traumas and mental health issues. So much has been kept hidden out of fear. Much ❤️ Love.
I hate social situations and need my own time and space to recover.
but it's easy for you because you live in western/developed countries,
imagine you live in developing/asian/african countries where people have
strong prejudices and they watching every inch of movement you've done..
They keep talking behind your back even thou you said nothing to them
or harm them verbally,,
you do this, community hates you
you do that, religion forbid you
you do this again, your parents hate you
it's easy if you live in liberal countries where liberty found its way
I like his technique of using code words or phrases ("this is my favorite song, lets roll") as a means of getting the hell out of a place. It's subtle and no one need ever know. Not heard of that one before.
TheJess Man dude move to Seattle for a while and you will fit in right in there!
Grow up.
@@abdur1300 comparing doesn't really help anyone. Hopefully you'll realize when you grow up.
This guys is a total badass and he has social anxiety, makes me feel a little better about my social anxiety. thank you for talking about this.
Same here. My doc recently told me she has anxiety on airplanes. I was like really me too! If she has this fear as a doctor then I don’t feel crazy anymore.
took the words right out of my mouth
Only through the mouths of people like him and you, will every day people be willing to discuss the issues that they are having with mental health. I think for a long time, it was considered taboo and crazy for people to discuss in public. But, I think the past few years and definitely the pandemic has forced people to reevaluate themselves and their circumstances and allow them to set themselves free by openly discussing what they are feeling with people. Which is one of the ways that they can heal. The more you keep locked up inside, the more anxious one can get. So God bless all these people for having the foresight and ability to share their experiences and especially what works for them to help relieve the symptoms. As it helps so many people who so desperately need it.
I’ve been an entertainer all of my life and you wouldn’t think that somebody who is used to being on the stage in front of thousands and sometimes tens of thousands of people would have an issue with anxiety. But the second I step off that stage and especially in a one on one or smaller room, I am a totally different person. I can talk to people, but I am less comfortable. Maybe the old trope safety in numbers is in play, I don’t know. But whatever the case, I have, especially over The past year have brought my inner child back out. Someone who was never afraid to talk to anyone or never let anything get to him. When I realized in doing so is that it was the people who kept trying to tell me too change into whatever they wanted me to be, that was causing the most of the anxiety. The second that you can for yourself from the prison cell of caring what other people think, The sooner you can live your life for you and realize that the time you spent trying to impress or please others in your life, could’ve been better spent just enjoying that life around you.
For whatever reasons, as adults we feel the need… Which I think is actually brought on by social pressure, to be an act a certain way. To dress a certain way as you age. To essentially be the clone of the perfect parent or adult. The thing is, you can be whenever you want to be throughout your life. There is no need to let others point you in any one direction as to who you need to be to essentially fit in. Because, if those people don’t like you for the person you are… You need to find new people to associate with. Because the you that you are, should be good enough for anybody. I always tell people, be you for you and nobody else. Because the second you let go of, what is essentially social pressure to act and be like everybody else, the second you are free of the anxiety. This may not be true for everybody, but for me it was a major steppingstone in getting back the person I used to be. Because the wife who supposedly pledged to love me for better or worse, decided that I needed to be this or that so that her friends would be impressed. Her entire life has been spent trying to live through the eyes of other people. And unfortunately that was talk to her by her mom. So it is hard encoded in her DNA. The second that I found out she was cheating, was actually more of a relief. Because it allowed me to get back to the basics that kept me happy for so many years before her. And I realized that she was the cause of most of my anxiety and depression. After a year of being away from her, I started to feel like my old self.
So, what you can take away from my story is that people around you can have an extreme effect on the person you are. Surround yourself with good people who love you for you and you will find a extremely happy life will follow. Learn the signs of narcissism and the people who have it and what they do and make sure you stay as far away from them as possible. Life, every day, is a learning experience for everybody. Learn to love yourself and the person you are, as opposed to trying to be the person and everybody else wants you to be. Enjoy every moment like it is your last, because you never know when it will be. Do away with all of the people in your life who is seemingly drag you down and replace them with people that have incredible happy spirits. Make every day and everything you do count and let those around you know how much you care. Because on your dying day, you don’t want regrets… You want to feel the love of those great people around you. That way you know you really succeeded in life.
I don't think Alex Jones has social anxiety. lol
just what i was thinking
You're a good man. Thank you for serving our country. It's clearly come at a great personal cost to you and you continue to fight for your country by showing us the way you cope with the after-effects of a lot of trauma and intensity. Thank you for sharing this.
Well said
Shawn, I find this not only fascinating, but extremely valuable. I was diagnosed with PTSD after 2 near death experiences. It's a hard road to walk. Especially if you choose to walk alone. You are SO correct about getting help. My dogs are great therapy. I would have lost this battle without them. Thru prayer, family support, getting professional help I am here today. The only thing that I just don't understand is how a former seal can be intimidated. You are of America's best. We are proud of you and your country is grateful for you standing between us and danger. I am a huge fan of your channel and look forward to every episode. Thank you for your continued service to America thru this work you are doing. You're making a mark and I personally am grateful for your channel. I'm no high speed dude. Just a proud American that loves his God, family and country and who's willing to give his life unconditionally for any of the 3. God bless you my friend. -Phantom.👊
Vietnam combat vet here...ptsd , social anxiety...work through it, thanks brother! Excellent advice!
Let go of what was.................appreciate the here and now .................. adopt a few kittens ...............life if good and fun if you'll believe it ..
Dennis Sutton thank you for your service
Welcome home brother.
“Wtf do I do with my hands when there isn’t not drink in my hand” my biggest social anxiety
I like to slowly flap my arms like a bird of prey. It's a sign of dominance.
@@SolarJakee I start jelqing
Wtf
Shadow puppetry
@@SolarJakee 😂😂😂
I come from a similar community, medically retired 2 years ago. I’ve been seriously struggling with this exact problem. I’ve thought I was crazy, or paranoid or just plain broke for the last few years. I gotta tell you I found this channel about a month ago, and it’s helped me so f’n much. I’m still going to psychotherapy, but I feel like listening to Shawn and the other guys on his show has done more for me than anything the VA has tried. Not sure if Shawn ever reads these, but I’d love to say: Thank you for doing what you do. I don’t know that you’ll ever understand what you’ve done for the SOF community.
As a natural autistic, I'm naturally socially anxious at all times, even at home in front of my immediate family. So, I appreciate your honest, no BS advice. You truly help out a lot of people with your videos
Dealt with Social Anxiety all my life. He's right. You don't have to talk. Stay away from the Alcohol. Always keep an escape route.
👍
Mister006 yea I have an alcohol problem myself. I THINK I’m outgrowing it and enlightening myself but Idk it’s always up in the air
@@evansaber7642 it's no laughing matter but it is comical how much I relate to that buddy. Just when you think you have things figured out you get a real good kick in the nuts. I'm just at the point where I do the best I can and try not to be a complete fuck up. That works for me at this point haha. Alcohol could be my demise but it's also the only lifeline I have left. I have to keep a very close eye on myself. Like Shawn was saying I also dont do hard alcohol. Maby a couple beers or a glass of wine to take the edge off. It can get out of hand so fast. Im in your corner man we are all in this thing together. I wish you the best in life. You got this!
Alcohol is only a bandaid, and usually makes things worse long run
Meth used to help me but noo it’s not socially acceptable. Bullshit.
“Don’t put yourself in a situation you can’t get out of,” said guy getting married.
Kidding bruh great video.
😂
And by kidding he means not kidding
jackderaway I wholly subscribe to Shawn’s philosophy on not putting yourself in said situation, but can’t speak to marriage personally for I think that same reason. Nothing against it tho...wish all you married guys a happy life.
Davo Rebo
85% of affairs happen at the work place. Financial freedom can play a major role in a strong marriage. I know my parents divorced over the dollar bill..
Davo Rebo well if you go into marriage with that kind of mindset, you probably won’t make it very long. What kind of dork starts running through the divorce percentages in his head before making the decision to legally bind himself to someone he truly loves? If you think you found the right guy/girl, and you’re really sure you want to marry, why not go for it? Of course you gotta marry for the right reasons, because in the end, it is a legal contract between two people with many strings attatched
If i asked someone what they do for a living and they straight up said they were a Navy Seal i would be extremely impressed. It really does go to show you that every type of person goes through some kind of anxiety. The fact that you choose to come on here and talk about it to help others is amazing.. much respect you are a amazing person.
Needed this! Have very bad social anxiety and depression myself and am trying to start RUclips and my goal is to get more comfortable on camera and build a group friends here on the platform! Really grasped a lot from this - much appreciated!!
What a nice humble guy, not trying to prove how manly he is at every turn. A true quiet professional.
two words, Navy Seal! All the proof you need.
This dude claimed he trained Keanu reeves. He’s a known liar
Is he genuine?
Sword of the Morning he’s caught a ton of hate recently in the firearms world over his claim.
@@jshaw1503 Do you have any sources for that? I badly wanted to believe he was a good guy with useful advice.
When he talked about having to drive his own car was spot on!
Seriously, I am exactly the same way.
Also, just be willing to walk away. I have walked as far as 8 miles to get out of a place and resume control. You can almost ALWAYS walk away. Just don't accept that trapped feeling.
Caleb Wynn I always bring my truck so I make the rules on when we go! Lol
Last time I got in a car with someone I trusted I was 19. I was setup and jumped by 12 people, and the only reason they didn't kill me was because a man came out yelling 911. If not for that I would have been dead. I woke up in a pool of my own blood on the asphalt. Ever since then I drive my own car. I will not get in the car with anyone.
I love your honesty about all this, especially the no hobby thing. Most people can't even admit that alone.
Thank you for this video, and I want to say your fiance is amazing for finding a way to get you out of the situation and into safety (mental safety). This video is great. I may not be a SEAL or any type of military but I suffer from social anxiety that is debilitating. Much love and respect.
Drunk people make my anxiety raise the roof. Clubs & Bars are definitely a No-Go at this station.
Just thinking of a drunk person in my personal space spitting all over me when they try to talk above the music makes my anxiety spike
@C Man pretty much lol
Banksy 💯 % dude I can’t go anywhere! I’m an avid pool player, I don’t drink or smoke cigarettes! Pool tables are only usually where there’s bars/ heavy drinkers! It’s my happy place! My stress reliever! But... it’s full of stress! People yelling, music way to loud! Cigarette smoke galore! Because people stand at the doors with them open, smoking cigarettes! I always feel people are watching me! Yet I also feel like a ghost that no one can see! I space out! I fight or flight! Luckily i flight before the fight! How do I deal with this shit? I just want to have peace in my mind
Ya who wants jail time or prison for a buzz? Full tard
bars & clubs are shitty places in general, not only for people who suffer from social anxiety.
A real man is able to talk about his fears and discomforts. Respect VE.
Real Tlk👌
this is the realest video i seen in forever, no extra talk, straight and unfiltered. Thanks for the vid
Shawn, can’t imagine the shit you’ve seen or been through, but someone like you making this video helped me. Thank you and for your service
this is a real man no bullshit just straight talk
Facts!
I happen to be a psychologist/psychonalyst who specializes in working with veterans/first responders. THANK YOU FOR ADVOCATING THERAPY!!!
Andrew Berry my pleasure. Thank you for what you do.
@@ShawnRyanShow I just emailed you. I hope that's OK.
Thanks for what you do I was a first responder years ago iam getting help now it's working
From a Canadian professional firefighter.... Thank you Andrew, keep up the important work.
Ive been to one, made it 10x worse but im glad it helps some
Thank you, Shawn. We still appreciate this, even in June of 20201. Thank you for all you do
Shawn is hilarious without even trying! The way he speaks is just so idgaf that I can't help but smile and have a laugh as he's saying what he's saying. Keep being you Shawn and thanks for the video and all your content. Love it!
Man, your honesty is powerful and refreshing. I've never heard a combat vet be so vulnerable. I have so much respect for this work. I think your message is gonna have legs.
I hope you're right. Thank you
@Mr. X I guarentee you are too pussy to serve, you know it, and that's where your anger comes from.
i think combat veteran sharing a "vulnerable" side says alot about our society's expectation on male gender role and violence.
being a soldier who deals with Death requires you to be a violent sheepdog, of course, you need to keep your wolf side under control or you will just turn into a wolf/war criminal. But often the society doesn't like to have a sheepdog around
Like Shawn said in the video, don't put you in a situation where you will get overwhelmed and can't get out in 3 seconds. Especially when you got trapped in an argument where the other side is just better at getting a ride of you or attacking your weak points. As the social condition makes you feel ashamed about your violent side, the trait you are proud of becomes your weak point in an argument. they be like "you like hitting women? come on, fight me like a real man!"
so the best bet really is...........just shut the fuck up and ignore them. "whatever man, its just my opinion"
@@rawx485 man, ppl don't respect each other anymore. pop culture really fucked it up
@@Spider-Too-Too and then social media compounded the problem
"Don't put yourself in things you can't get out of," Probably why I feel so stressed in long checkout lines.
Or because there's nothing for people to do but stand there and look at you. This used to really bother me too. I finally accepted, I look fine, and they might be worried I'm looking at them too. In reality, most people are standing there on their phones or preoccupied by some other crap in their lives.
I get anxious in the grocery store before the line. I have started listening to audiobooks while I shop and I am a lot more relaxed by the time I get to check out.
That's why I hate being in the middle of the line in a drive thru
I thought I was the only one
I do have that feeling, too, very strongly. But some day, it will go away. I know that. Nothing is permanent. Stay strong but don't be too hard on yourself.
Wow. I relate to this so much. The whole 'What Do You Do' question is daunting and ruins my mood whenever I am in a social setting because of the constant judgement. Social anxiety is fucking tough but it gets better and I'm getting through it.
Man I really appreciate you talking about this. To know a man with your background deals with this too it helps. Thanks
I’ve noticed a lot of alcoholics deal with social anxiety. They use the drink as a social lubricant and when the don’t have it they’re awkward AF
Cool. Thanks
Yeah I do this because nothing else works trying kratom soon
I self identify with this statement
I get that, I have super bad social anxiety but as soon as I even get a little buzzed all my thoughts come out
That’s 100% facts, at least in my situation. When i discovered alcohol in high school, i thought i’d found the cure to my anxiety. 15 years, two dui’s, and dozens of lost opportunities later, i’m learning to deal with this shit myself.
A doctor, a lawyer and a Navy Seal are in a room, the Navy Seal is the one that should get the most respect in my book.
Plus, he was a CIA operative as well.
I’m a doctor. I give veterans the most respect in my office by always thanking them for their service to me and our great country. I agree, being a doctor is nothing compared to any military personnel or veteran.
@@Maxumized I do respect both but veterans get the most respect, now for lawyers that is another story.
@@Maxumized you save lives and you made that decision, he made the decision to be some ones puppet ( no disrespect ,i did recon for 4yrs 1JP (Belgium)) I think you just made a better choice IMO.
We all have people that we look up to and who inspire us. Thank you. Seriously. Thank you for your advice and honesty.
I want to thank you. Thank you for your service and thank you for telling your story. My teenage daughter has suffered from social anxiety and chronic depression since she was about 6 years old and battles with it daily. There are days where it is hard for her to leave her bedroom much less the house. Your video helped me understand her just a little more after all these years because she has never been able to quite put into words how she feels on those days
Cant even stand in line at Walmart sometimes. Hang in there yall!!
Standing in line sweating, heart thumping, eyes darting at every movement, scared I'm going scare people by being so weird.
brandon cohen OMG there is never a reason to go to Walmart. The Walking Dead helps me
@@jumbo4billion damn sorry you go through this but nice to know I'm not alone
@@johnherring9633 Cheers John. I wouldn't have thought to comment if Brandon hadn't done so first. We have to share this stuff so we all understand that it's normal and we're not alone with it. Keep on keeping on mate.
@@jumbo4billion stay safe brother
When people ask "What do you do for a living" they don't really care what you do. They can't wait to tell you what they do, Be vague and brief, then flip it back on them and pretend to be interested. They will walk away from that conversation thinking you're a great conversationalist. It's a stress free way to get through social events.
Tenacious V Lol @ “pretend to be interested”. That is the exact type of social situation that I try to avoid. In other words, I don’t ask questions about things I don’t care the answer to.
I'm pretty vague with everyone. But I wonder what's a good vague response when someone asks what I do?
@@ChandlerWorthen Say what company you work for and general category of your job. I'm a microscopist, which is super boring to talk about. I usually say "Oh, I work for Company X in one of the labs. You know, high tech stuff..(wait for blank stare) What do you do?".
people suck huh..theyre getting worse by the decade too
So why the fuck would i care what they do lol
I've been dealing with angry drunk for a few years now. I am generally a nice person but when I drink heavily, I'm angry and love to fight. Well this past week on vacation I drank heavily with an old friend and my 2 boys saw how "inhuman" I can be. I am ashamed and won't drink anymore. I really appreciate your video. Hit me right when I needed most. Thanks brother
Thank u for sharing this. To hear someone like you can suffer with this helps us all. Thanks for opening up. Hero.
I suffer from social anxiety too. I overcame it by getting a job where I'm forced to talk to complete strangers everyday. And communicating and being around strangers became natural.
Me too! Im a huge introvert but i became a nurse and i am pretty good at talking with strangers
I tried that. It was a dumpster fire. Glad your anxiety is manageable.
Having a job to show up for on the regular is more difficult than anyone could admit. Getting to work and through the day is no easy feat. It’s the foundation that all normalcy rests.
Natural Slasher why is joining the army an option? If you do not know what to do with yourself, then its not the best idea to have another person telling you to go to another country to kill other humans there...
@@chifdet5878 not true. The military breaks down your personality during boot camp and then builds it back up with confidence in yourself. Secondly it will give him a job and teach him out to do it. Not all military personnel are infantry. Kid could become an IT guy, a mechanic, a cook. Huge opportunities there.
A man has two lives. The second one starts when he realizes he only has one.
Confucius says
🤔🤔🤔 I read that in the back of Playboy once
Wes K helps me with my anxiety... whenever I find myself overthinking a situation I think of that quote and try to look at my life from a 30,000’ view... that’s why I love flying in planes. Puts everything into perspective. How irrelevant we really are. You can block out the sun with a dime if you stare at it close enough.
The Kids Nice hey that’s an awesome quote! Who is it? You?
Momma Llama I’m not sure where I heard it... certainly not my wisdom
This is the second time I watched this, and I don t recall if I commented. I have the need to say that this is the straight up most honest, helpful and courageous thing I have seen, and you are helping people. Having a big title or bankroll will never make someone as bad ass as you!
Algorithms brought me here. I'm glad it did sir. I needed this seriously. Thank you.
I am 19 years old and i have autism, i can relate to what hes saying cause i have social anxiety,my stepdad and my mom been helping me with it and i have been getting better at socializing with people,i ain't as quiet around people as i used to be, this video was really helpful,thank you for sharing your tips.
@theo dorou thank u.
@Kevin Most People that you will encounter on a daily basis have just as much anxiety as you will. They usually just try to hide it in various ways and may even be mean or angry in order to distract you from their own insecurity. The more times they are genuinely mean, the more they reveal themselves as being more insecure than you are. Once you realize this a lot of your own anxiety will beging to go away.
I’m 41 and learned very late I’m in a similar boat. It’s a terribly unfair and invisible disadvantage we face- judgement, and/or the fear of it. I am lucky that I have a wife and two boys that love me for who I am, help extract the best of me, and help me see where I need to change my expectations of myself and others.
Nobody will ever tell you that you’re special...but know you are special to those that love you. Embrace what makes you unique, do things that you believe to be right, and never stop learning. You will be on higher ground in the end. Take care.
@@snail415 i will
I couldn’t even order at McDonald’s when I was younger I used to have my little sister talk to people for me. I tried to change my mentality to sort of “practice” talking to people cuz practice makes perfect
I can guarantee i havent been through a quarter of the shit this guy has been through, but god damn i can relate to what hes saying. Anxiety switching to anger is probably my biggest one
Just stumbled on this video. 100% Happy I did. Probably my biggest dilemma since getting out. More so comforted knowing I'm not alone in this. Thank you sir.
Dude....I WISH I had come across a video like this YEARS ago. Your description of your struggle almost identically mirrors my own...through failed relationships, through alcoholism and AA, through LIFE since about the age of 10. And yet, unlike me, you're a Navy SEAL and ex-CIA -- IOW, about as badass as it gets. If a guy like you can still go through this -- then I know I don't really have much to be ashamed of. Just hearing your story and background is a HUGE confidence-builder in and of itself. One-thousand and one thank-yous for this video -- and for your distinguished service.