0:28 They will never apologize to you or admit that they were wrong. 1:08 They will never tell the truth. 1:40 They will never forgive or make peace. 2:18 They will not listen to you. 2:45 They will not take responsibility. 3:15 They will not seek help or professional support. 3:54 They don’t address the difficulties they have with emotional stability and manipulation. 4:34 They will not act selflessly. 5:08 They will never provide you with any sense of safety. 5:34 They will never let you go. 5:52 They don’t want change.
I could of stopped a robber who was stealing 3 pairs of shoes by chucking my phone at the back of their head like throwing an axe close range The the store was famous footwear What are the chances of the person steals my phone
@@mamapoch1915 a time stamp won't affect the creators at all. We'd still have to see all the ads and stuff even after jumping forward. It just makes it easier for us watchers to skip to the important part and RUclips themselves has this time stamp feature. It doesn't affect the creators at all!
The narcissist I dated for 3 years would always say I was too sensitive, when I would bring up their behavior, they would also NEVER apologize when they were clearly in the wrong. To a point that I had to use text messages in exchanges and they denied those were real. She made me question my sanity and memory by gaslighting me to no ends of the earth. Glad to be away and healing through therapy as it really did a number on me and trusting myself and my reality.
Same. When I said anything she has done wrong she would say that im being too sensitive. To the point i believed for a long time that i was indeed too sensitive. In the end it would turn to me apologizing for the manipulative things she did. Looking back at it now I wish i got out of the friendship sooner. I hope u feel better now and know that u deserve better.
Thank you for sharing. Sorry you had to experience such a toxic relationship. Happy that you found therapy that helped you. What advice would you give to your younger self?
@Psych2Go honestly, get out at the first sign, don't take someone's diagnosis as means to let the abuse continue and don't be afraid. They hoover me now but are trying to steal my friends. So far have stolen one good one from me
I had a "best friend" that was a narcissist, they manipulated me and made me feel guilty and miserable my entire childhood and early teenage years. Even now after a few years of blocking contact with them I still feel the affects of their actions on me every day.
“When a toxic person can no longer control you, they will try to control how others see you. The misinformation will feel unfair, but you stay above it, trusting that other people will eventually see the truth just like you did.” - Jill Blakeway
What really makes me mad is that they’ll never genuinely apologize without throwing in a manipulation tactic but they feel SO entitled to their own apology and will make you feel like the worst person in the world if they don’t get it, doesn’t matter if they did that and worse to you, it’s always your fault.
Yes exactly. I was manipulated into doing and saying things to someone that I would never have done or said otherwise. Then when I realized that it was going too far I tried to cut it off but the person manipulated me into feeling so badly about it that I ended up crying and apologizing. I feel for you too if you've had that happen. It's so messed up
The thing is, what if it really is YOUR fault? There's a thin line here....I think everyone just wants to make an excuse for narcissism because they don't want to admit to their wrongdoing. Just saying so in general, not directly to you. People argue all the time and both sides want to be on the right. My ex gf always was right even though it was crazy obvious she was wrong many of the times. Hell, I once admitted to her I was wrong in an argument and left it at that and then she would rub it in my face that I was wrong and gloat she was right. Kept going on, like further twisting that knife in the back where I eventually said "ok, it's over....I get it. Why keep making it worse? Just move on."
Exactly! This is what makes me so mad when I'm asked to apologize it means that they have won and got what they wanted people don't seem to understand this when the victim of narcissism is forced to apologize the victim is not getting any benefit out of it but the narcissist is The narcissist thrives off of chaos and pain and by apologizing it shows them that they can do whatever they want to you with no consequences which is why I get so angry when I'm told to apologize to them congratulations you took whatever little confidence that I had left and gave it to them and now they're going to walk around thinking that they can get away with whatever they want and nothing is going to stop them
I kinda disagree with number 1. There are different types of narcissists. The covert narcissist may apologize when spoken to in a calm and communicative manner and say all the things they know you want to hear. Only to turn around and act the same way they always have, and likely gas light you when you call them out.
Thank you for saying this, I have been burned by a covert narcissist so many times because I fell for their apologies. They gain your trust by seeming sincere, then attack you again later. It’s a cycle. 💔
@@quillfairy same here. They give you a fake apology such as “I’m so sorry. I missed you so much and I was in so much pain when you left!” So honestly #1 is varied
Bruh my imposter syndrome be so bad that when people say “narcissistic people don’t think their narcissists” my brain goes “but what if I’m lying to myself about thinking I’m a narcissist and I actually am a narcissist!” Edit: a lot of people are talking about how some narcissists do know their narcissists. Yes I am aware that people like this exist and that people with NPD are still people. Another thing people were pointing out was that if I show traits of NPD I should talk to someone about it. I don’t, my self esteem is just so bad that I think giving myself any self care or self love makes me a narcissist. Just because you love yourself and enjoy your own company dosent make you a narcissist. Anyway good luck to everyone, I hope y’all can get trough your mental struggles!
Maybe it's me pretending that i'm concerned about my narcissism just to deep inside think that i don't have a problem with that because "narcissistic people don't think their narcissists" help
“Life is a battle zone in their eyes” I’m literally here to keep it that way in my narc mother’s eyes because of the betrayal with my sister. My mom is literally the reason why I found out about gaslighting and this channel as a whole. That’s one time where the YT algorithm worked in my favour.
This is %100 right, my mother is a narcissist and has done everything in this video at some point in time. Very sad. Sending love to anyone effected by a narcissistic parent. ❤️
My twin sister to a T. Though it has progressive gotten worse as we've aged. I think her long-term drug addiction has exacerbated it. Could this happen?
The Never telling the truth part really resonated with me. I've told enough lies in my life to the point where I can no longer tell the difference between what's real and what I said was real. I hate when people figure out or question my stories because I know that they will loose trust in me if they learn the truth. My whole life is based on lies and I truly wish that I can make things go back to normal, but alas, I may live forever with a backstory that isn't mine.
That is awesomely courageous of you to share. You have great creative talent. I want to read the nex episode. How does is story fall apart and he is left standing un touched. discovering he could not be a thought or a feeling. Sooo exciting. Keep posting i really appreciate. My mom and grandma would slightly bend the truth and end up with compleat lies.
As someone who had been on the recieving end of such tactics, it's nice to see the other side sharing their feelings about this. Thank you for being so open and vulnerable about something that may not get much understanding. I hope this doesn't get taken the wrong way but maybe it's as simple as telling the truth. Try it with small things and work your way up to the big stuff. It's going to be hard and very uncomfortable at first but it will easier get over time. Think of it this way, the fact that you are able to be this vulnerable means that these lies have been disturbing your peace for far too long. The anxiety of being "found out" or exposed, trying to remember all the lies, etc. Is it worth it? You deserve better than that and you owe it to yourself to at least try to see how it goes. Much love and respect to you 😊
if you confront their wrong doings you'll get a response like "im sorry you feel that way" - basically putting it back onto you, while showing no accountability or regret.
I was narcissistic but not nacissistic personality disorder. It stems from insecurity and the way I overcame this was by peeling off the layers of my own self and looking at myself honestly even if it feels awful. I challenged myself by doing martial arts and getting myself humbled when sparring with people better than me.
Being narcissistic is not bad as long as you’re not malicious, have empathy and you can prove what you boast. Don’t let this narc education undo you like it’s doing me. Keep your confidence! It’s also how you protect yourself from the monsters
Sorry no time for these people, I've walked away and never looked back. Known these people past good few years.Ive carried this for a long time and leaving them was best thing I've done so far this year! They just bring you down to a certain level that you start to question yourself. Not worth the tears n anguish.
I had a good friend who was a narcissist. We’re no longer friends (I ended the friendship) as I was tired of the verbal abuse. Nothing was ever her fault - it was always mine. I was done.
Nearly ten years after getting the monster out of my house, I still hear his constant insults in my head. Everything I do, everything I think, he's there insulting me every step of the way. That's the worst thing about such people. They live in your head forever.
It must fade at some point? Its been two years without mine and he still pops up but its much less than it was at the beginning. Somehow they manage to burrow themselves into your mind and soul but i believe in healing and digging them out
You must accept that you allowed it to happen. If I was stuck in that position again and I had to make the choice of living with a narcissist or death, I would gladly bathe in their blood. But hey. Once you come to terms with the fact that you allowed it, you allowed yourself to lie to yourself after you convinced yourself of the truth. Then you can begin to repair the damage and fix your problems. As humans we are capable of the worst evils, or the most unconditional love. We choose. And they chose the life of denial and abuse. You can't not save them, but you can save yourself.
This literally describes my ex-girlfriend. I was questioning my sanity after we broke up but I'm glad that I bumped into this video. Their manipulation skill is really on another level.
22 years with NPD wife...your points spot on. Hardest part for me was to accept there has NEVER been any real love from her. Have left for good and filed divorce....moved to Ecuador....finally finding peace.
Literally same. I didn't realize she was until I was 25 I was so brainwashed from the lifelong gaslighting. Suddenly SO much made sense. It's rough having that kind of mom. My heart goes out to you, I'm sorry you're going through it too ❤
Being pregnant while having a narcissistic partner was the worst thing EVER. Being yelled at (while body changes and being so vulnerable) and being told it’s all your fault that the male is gaining weight is the ugliest feeling. I could go on and on. But it was the WORST. As my body was changing the narc acting like I was now gross and non attractive. He didn’t even like to touch my belly to feel the baby move around when the baby was growing. So thankful I studied and found protection from being belittled and abused.
I hate to see so many people who can relate to this like I can 🥺. Over the years I’ve been able to grow past the trauma that a narcissist can cause I Just hope the same for you all 💜
I’m glad I spot the signs so easily now. I’ve been watching videos and reading about narcissism for days and it’s like watching me talk about my experiences… I hope anybody dealing with one finds the strength to cut them off. Going no contact or at least minimal contact is the only way, since they will never change.
In some, rare, instances one cannot cut off the narcissist. Not without losing something or someone important to them. It sucks. It hurts. It’s frustrating. But sometimes you have to humor and basically enable the narcissist; you have to apologize for things you shouldn’t have to, keep your mouth shut when they start touting their self-inflating BS, and just agree with everything they have to say if you want to keep the peace. It’s exhausting, but sometimes (sadly) necessary.
I feel like having a parent with narcissistic tendencies can affect how you act as well. My dad definitely has a lot of these things, the majority of the, actually. I noticed that sometimes, children with parents who have narcissistic tendencies can take after those traits. So, if you ask yourself “am I a narcissist?” You’re probably not and you’re probably just taking some of their tendencies without wanting to. Sometimes, people will act like their parents when faced with a situation similar to theirs. An example: I have ADHD but my father always denied me having that, despite me having a diagnosis. He keeps questioning me and doubting me about the majority of my diagnostics and disorders. So often times, when I have a friend say they think they might have the same disorder as me, my first thought is going to be similar to what my dad tells me. I make sure not to air those thoughts out because I know they can be hurtful but those are always my first thoughts. Just doubting and questioning cuz that’s what my dad always does
That is truly sad 🥺 just know that deep under the layers of influence from ur dad , u r still in there. The original u who will think twice about saying something hurtful. ❤ love urself u got this
Yeah I agree, though I think it can be broader than just parents. If either of my parents is a true narc, my mom is. My dad mainly just has a lot of unaddressed trauma he deals with very poorly, including with some narc things. Over the course of the 25 years I interacted with them before cutting them off, the scariest part was how easily they took on each other’s manipulation strategies-especially my mom since she was clearly doing it more consciously-and used that to very symbiotically create and reinforce their own reality.
I somehow managed to get my narcissistic mother into therapy recently. She asked me to book a session with my therapist. My therapist was shocked to hear that my mom wanted an appointment with her and also was proud of me for convincing my mom because the therapist had been trying since last year. It's a long story about how did that happen and it conflicts with 6. Narcissists do not seek professional help. I no longer know if my mom really wants help or she just thinks that my therapist is the reason why I'm keeping my distance from her and wants to know what happens in my sessions. And I've already talked to my therapist about this topic.
@@MiBookaholic I'm so sorry to hear that. I doubt that she truly wants help... She is really manipulative. I've already warned my therapist about it and she told me not to worry, she'll deal with my mom.
Another thing I've heard of narcissists doing is going to therapy for very few sessions and then claiming they "went to therapy" in order to try to prove to others that they've somehow changed.
@@krishtikaneerahoo5040 Even if your mom doesn't truely want help, I'm glad that she is willing to go. Even if it's to save face, at least your therapist would be able to see what you are up against and guide you better. That is a lot of work ahead of you, but it will so be worth it! From a stranger, I'm proud of you and rooting for you! Good luck!
@@krishtikaneerahoo5040 It is great your mother tries out therapy. You will soon realize if she really wants to change or Not. Be Patient. Stay Strong. Even if one is a narcissist, everyone can change if they really want to. So it does not really collide with point 6. You can ne narcissistic but seek help, If you realize that the way you are does not make you truly happy. It is rare with this personality but it happens ♥️
My father is an extreme narcissist and struggles with BPD, as well as many other things, so you could imagine how my childhood was. There were a lot of messed up things he did in my childhood that I previously thought was normal until my parents divorced when I was 13, nearly 14, in 2018. We were financially unstable when I was a child and he was a workaholic, so he was never really present in my childhood, but I still looked up to him and thought of him as an idol in a way. Even after all the horrible things he's done, which I'll explain below. But when he was home, he would mistreat me, my mom, and my three sisters. My father would lock me and my older sister outside all day while he was gone at work without food and water, telling us to dig a hole in the dirt and fill it back up multiple times until he returned home after the sun was down. He did this all year long and my little sister brought food to us in secret. He would also force us, children under six years old, to carry heavy bricks and build walls in the back yard as punishment - just to kick them down and force us to do it again and again and he even went as far as to make my older sister sleep outside in the dark, knowing that there were opossums, wolves, raccoons, and bears thriving in the forest in our backyard. He would also shove full bars of soap into our mouths when we talked back, making my little sister - who was two or three at the time - have a severe allergic reaction and she had to be rushed to the emergency room. He would also put us on 5-minute timers to eat full dinner plates of food or he would force feed us or beat us with his belt or the metal end of a fly swatter. And looking about it, it makes sense why three of the four of us have had eating problems, even to this day; The last thing I remember him doing was he used to lock all of me and my sisters in the small bedroom we shared - again, without food and water - the whole day and we would scream and cry, hungry and desperate to use the bathroom within the 6-10 hours we would be locked in there. It wasn't until later that I found out why my mom never helped us was because she was experiencing crippling depression because of my father and literally *couldn't* get out of her bed. My parents fought a lot but I never knew why he would sometimes leave and not come back for days, even weeks sometimes. Now, my mom has told me why and my childhood made a lot more sense knowing that he had been cheating on her for their entire marriage, up until he decided he didn't want to deal with the guilt and divorced her - leaving her to support four daughters with no career experience. She worked at Chick-fil-a, miserable and I remember her sobbing in the car every day because she was worried about losing the house and having nowhere to go. Not to mention the $32,000 debt he left my mother in, which the IRS didn't care who's debt it was and took the money anyway, giving her unredeemable low credit so she will never be able to buy a house and has us stuck in renting. The house *was* taken from us, and so was our car, and her dad helped us pay to stay in an apartment until he died of a heart attack three months later, my father said to my mom at his funeral that he "felt bad for divorcing her right before her dad died" and not for everything else he caused. If that isn't the most narcissistic thing someone could say, I don't know what is. He proceeded to verbally abuse me and my sisters, my older sister taking the brunt of the abuse until her therapist told her not to keep going to his house anymore, which he still takes out on us to this day and accuses her of making things up. My younger sister and I were his favorite victims of his verbal and emotional abuse after that, calling us "little spies" for taking pictures of his nasty house and the lack of food he had, which has affected my appetite to this day. He screamed at us and told us how during the beginning of the divorce, he wanted to unalive himself because he didn't see us, calling us selfish, and turned the wifi off so we couldn't call our mom. (Which was not allowed in the custody agreement. We are supposed to have the ability to contact with both parents 24/7.) Now, after a year and a half of telling my dad, I never wanted to see him again, he's remarried and is corrupting my youngest sister's (who is 13 and considered his "golden child") mind by telling her we don't love her because she's pansexual and we won't accept her (despite me being asexual and my whole family knowing). Currently, he's trying to go to court so he won't have to pay child support for my older sister who's 19, and me, who's 18 soon, despite him having skipped over a whole year of paying child support and for our education like he's required to and my mom can't find someone to take her case and sue my dad. Wish us luck. And thank you for letting me rant, none of my friends understand my situation.
Am so sorry 😞 you had to endure so much could not imagine that praying for you sweet child and hope you can find some peace god bless and all your sisters🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻
That's a psychopath. But all socio and psychopaths (anti social disorder) are narcissists, not all narcissists are socios or psychopaths. Also likely borderline, which gets confused with bipolar. Borderline switches from decent to angry in an unexplainable heartbeat. Bipolar is when someone is up for 5 days without sleep , happy , enthusiastic confident, then crashes... sleeps for days , depressed , etc Hope this helps. I'm sorry for your childhood . I relate . And reading your story helps me know I'm not alone. 💗💪🔥
Just to clarify - you are right - definitely disgusting narcissistic that I completely relate to and feel your pain. It's just to clarify not only is it narcissism , I'm in the process of processing my relatives who I've been calling out for narcissism are actually psychopaths. My niece, daughter of narc , said "her mother (my sister) is more evil than a narcissist. I think she's psychopath." Takes time to process. Sounds like what your dealing with too . Wishing you healing as well ❤️✨
As someone that also experienced his childhood with a narcisst as father, I can easily imagin what you went through psychologicaly. I hope you and your sisters will stay as strong as you are and will succeed in your lives and get the happiness you deserve. The tunnel has always an end. Keep going forward
TIMELINES: 0:28 They will never apologise to you or admit that they were wrong. 1:08 They will never tell the truth. 1:40 They will never forgive or make peace. 2:18 They will not listen to you
I've accepted that I have many narcissistic traits. I'm working to overcome the conditioning I learned as a child from parents with high degrees of narcissism as well. I'm no longer blaming them for the problems I have today, but recognizing where I learned some of these "skills" is important for growth. I know that I've hurt people and I've been trying hard to forgive myself and others every day
Tell me about it. I have been living with this my entire life and literally whenever there's heat between me and someone, I'm always the one to get pinned and every witness acting like it's objective that my opponent did nothing wrong and that I'm the one who ''started it''. At this point, those who love to pin the blame and act like they are 100% fair so much are the real devils around but noooope, reality always SOMEHOW finds a way to ''prove them right'' Gaslighting is the absolute worst...
@@frostlightningx1636 yeah I know what you mean,lol. I was just thinking about this, how in “every scenario” if something goes wrong it is always my fault (even when I am not even involved) 😂
To tell you the truth it is possible to win with them. But it's hard and depends what kind of narcissist they are. I was with a narcissist boyfriend for a long while. He was extremely abusive but tried to be deceitful through acting nice. It mentally destroyed me but my best friend tried to get me out of that relationship making me realise. I managed to make alt accounts and all so my bf couldn't watch me and I made him believe I'm not online when I actually was having fun with my friends or lied I wasn't meeting them when I was and much more. Everything he was putting me down for I managed to cover and lie back to him making him believe I was listening when I wasn't. I got away with many things and this way we both were satisfied. Soon I realized I should be with someone I don't have to lie to with nearly everything as it was exhausting and stressful. I then broke up with him again playing a victim making him believe my parents didn't want us to date anymore made up some proof. He freaked out cause I wouldn't be his planet anymore and tried to badly get back with me giving me gifts and all to earn me back to manipulate me. I didn't come back. He still tells my friends how unfortunate it is and how it's my parents fault lol. After a while he got with a new gf but she soon broke up with him. Now I'm with a much better partner (my best friend who got me out of it) and my narcissistic ex got over me but is all lonely.
All of these points are why I am careful how much time I spend around my father. I have learned to say no more often to things....and be consistent with my boundaries. Don't let people walk all over you!
I deal with a narc who will readily mutter "I'm sorry", but there is clearly zero remorse. It feels like it is just two words they learned that they can say to move on to the next topic.
TW: Abuse: I like to watch these and reflect on why my stepdad was such a narcissist. I remember I wasn't able to tell anyone about the abuse my mom faced bc of immigration and when she died he told me about her mentally struggled and said " I don't know why you didn't want to help her or be there for her " he even proceeded to lie at her funeral about what an amazing marriage they had. Watching these helps me realized that I should stop gaslighting myself and understand these people are real
Wish I would have seen this video 4 1/2 years ago... ex-BF had all 11! I could have saved my tears and heart ache. That relationship finally ended with my escape and the ONLY way to get out of a relationship with a narcissist is TOTAL ghosting!!!!!
Ended a 30 marriage. Until I started going to therapy I didn't realize I was in a toxic relationship with a Narc (or at least a person with a Borderline Personality Disorder). It has taken a lot to get past the trauma and damage, but the past year has been very blessed and getting better. Thanks to videos like these, it has helped me understand more of what happened and how to move forward.
This is my grandma and half of my family on my dads side. It’s sad but I’m glad I don’t have them in my life. I’ve always struggled with a few diff mental illnesses and they made it so much worse. I’m grateful for myself and my strength to not allow them Into my life. I won’t tolerate people like this even though I have my whole life until a few years back. It took everything in me to cut my grandma off but I knew I needed to do it. I feel so much better now💜 thanks for bringing awareness to this it’s so important!
''You are the problem, you are the bully, you are the bad guy, you are the embodiment of selfishness. Forgiveness is earned, and you haven't earned it yet. You are a child and need to be taught humility.'' Nope, still didn't forget... Yes, it is true that I can make missteps but whenever I try to back down or elaborate I only get ''You started it'' like I'm the only one who made a mistake...
It’s a personality disorder that requires an awareness they have it and therapy/inner work to change the behavior. I had a boyfriend that has it. All the patterns in his past relationships were the same as with me. I was the villain and everyone thought he was just the greatest, yet I was constantly trying to please him. My mom is also one and we were estranged until she was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s and I had to take care of her. She didn’t talk to me my whole teen/adult years, even when we lived under the same roof. I never knew what I did wrong and I was a good kid, always trying to please. I’m in therapy once a week because I had a mental breakdown taking care of her in my home and I’m still trying to figure out how not to feel guilty. The ex? I wouldn’t shed a tear if he died. Sounds mean but he put me through hell
i cut my dad out. no matter what illness he has, i have no feelings towards him and wouldn't have a single care if he died miserably. change starts with you. you deserve to be happy
Also they are addicted to their head games, lying, hostlility, inner anger, being manipulative, blame shifting, vindictiveness and torturing their victims. They will not stop.
I'm so glad that this video exists. My ex girlfriend keep telling me that I had narcissist disorder in a moment of my life that I has a streak of success at work and I was feeling proud of that. She was so convinced because she "studied it" that I believed her. I keep telling myself that I need to change and try to undermine anything good l did. Even after breaking up with her. I still believed that she was wright and I was narcissist. This video helped me a lot to get a little of mental peace. Thanks.
My sister to a T. Once I was exhausted and she responded "well we're all exhausted...". She also will throw temper tantrums on a dime when something doesn't go her way. I swear, being around her is like being next to a lit fuse and just waiting to see what kind of outburst happens next. I'm starting to set boundaries and tell my family "no" for my own well being though.
It’s unfortunate that a lot of narcissists will never take the steps to change. It’s hard for both the people they’re hurting and on themselves. I have diagnosed npd and alot of what was said in this video is true. I have to fight against alot of this everyday and constantly work to have functional and healthy relationships with people. I don’t think people realize that narcissism is a serious mental health issue that causes constant intense emotional pain for the people who suffer with it. You truly feel like you can’t trust anyone and have to constantly be on the defensive. I wish more people with npd would learn to look inward and try to help themselves. They’d be so much happier. Ever since I started really trying to fix these issues and work on building my empathy my life has improved so much and my relationship with my girlfriend, friends and family have gotten immensely better. It’s definitely possible for narcissists to get better but they have to really want to.
How can I deal with a npd sibling who can only thrive when I’m down (from her constant betrayal)? Your answer as someone with this diagnosis would be very helpful
I have a narcisstic personality disorder. Some behaviors operates unconciously and i‘m mostly aware of them but somestimes i noticed them to late. It‘s like those traits are so embedded they are a part of me.
My mother and my x husband are both narcissists. After I went no contact with her, she teamed up with my x and they are trying to take my children. They are wicked lunatics
The thing that the narcissist in my life would always say was, "I can't make you feel anything. You are in control of your emotional responses." Keep in mind, I was a child and this person had a history of emotional abusing people. It was always so frustrating and it took me years to realize that this was just wrong. The power they had and the fear they used on me deeply impacted my emotions and to deny such a thing was just more gaslighting. I'm so glad I'm a way from them. Coming up on 5 years now.
Only recently I've realised that I was with a person who was a narcissist and they spoiled what was supposed to be the best five years of college life. I hope people recognize and try to move on from these narcissist for the better!
Had a recent ex accuse me of narcissism and I think they were probably gaslighting. These vids helped me feel a bit more human. Pretty sure I just had rejection sensitivity dysphoria.
I've been harassed by some of the worst narcissists alive, and, unfortunately, my situation doesn't allow me to simply take my leave of them. So as a man of experience, these traits always go together. If you experience a single one, your fight or flight response _will_ kick in. Don't ignore or minimalize it. Fighting them is always to be preferred unless they are a kickboxer, but if you feel the need to get away, do it and don't look back. To anyone who's ever experienced gaslighting or narcissism, my heart is with you and I'm praying for you. Stay strong, my loves, and never take any shit from anybody! 💗
I'm currently trying to leave the orbit of a narcissistic romantic partner. this one was a big oof when Amanda said "they will not let you go"... my heart sank... that's exactly what it feels like and the way I love makes leaving so hard... I know she'll never change but she has my heart and I'll always wish she would... luckily, therapy has at least helped me begin to drift away from her
Iam there now I think. I just really want to make it work, change, find a solution. It must be so painful for her to be unable to really trust anyone, I want her to trust me, i have told her so often. Nothing works, except doing exactly what she wants... I hope you are over it.
The biggest problem for me when dealing with narcissistic people was my own _psychological projection._ Basically I wanted to see the good in everyone, and tended to excuse bad behaviour as an aberration rather than something Intrinsicly part of them. I thought that by modelling good behaviour in myself, their narcissism would fade away. It took me decades to realise that these people just don't think that they're doing anything wrong, so they are never going to change. I felt very naive when I finally realised what I was doing wrong. Now those narcissistic people have been cut from my life. No contact anymore, and I'm a lot calmer and happier for finally doing that. Bottom line: Some people really don't care that they cause hurt in others, and just because I sometimes accidentally hurt others, and then I try to fix what I did wrong, doesn't mean that everyone else wants to fix the hurt they caused too.
I've been scared that im a narcissist for a long time, because my ex claimed i was one. I was scared because i hate the idea im doomed to hurt people forever, i was pretty sure i wasn't but the anxiety that i was never went away, but thanks to this video im sure im not, especially because of the part about how narcissists rarely self reflect, self reflection is something i do constantly, cause im so scared im gonna mess up or that i did mess up
Everybody hurt ppl at some point I think I’m a narcissistic but i really like staying alone there’s nobody to hurt I enjoy making ppl happy but not at the cost of my own happiness so I stay away I have friends but I keep everybody at a distance
All these videos about narcissists..it's like watching a video about my younger brother. I'd hate to lose his gf as a possible sister-in-law because I love her so much, but she deserves so much better than the controlling, gaslighting jerk my brother is. Thank you for creating these. it also helps solidify any uncertainties I've had in the past when I've been made out to be the bad one when he did something awful.
I was actually a narcissist from as young as I can remember till 8 years old when I moved to my current school. Almost everyone in the new school is warm, positive and genuinely friendly(something I never received at my old school). So I slowly became more aware of myself even though I didn't admit to my behaviour at the time(didn't know narcissists exists). It was a hard process with so many little steps, but it's definitely worth it! I am now proud of myself for having succeeded in this much progress and achieving true happiness from my friends/families. It has been almost another 8 years since I transferred, and I'm still working on improving my inner self and social skills(which r abt 2years behind my peers). Hopefully, narcissists will begin to realize themselves and their thinking even if it's a slow development! it would've helped with stress levels loads for them and others too :))
Excellent video, thank you. From my experience, I noticed my acquaintance who is definitely a narcissist, NEVER says "please" or "Thank you", and when approached by me saying; "hey a simple please wouldn't hurt", he said; "Please is for strangers". I thought that was very telling.
Sadly, my dad falls into this category. My mom has told me that he is a narcissist, but regardless, I still love and forgive him. It gets hard cause he married a narcissistic woman, my step-mother. But to those of you in the same boat, you’re not alone. Find something or someone you truly trust and find comfort in them. This always seems to help me! Also, if you need to vent, there’s a good song called “narcissist” by Avery Anna!
I am sorry. I always had a good relationship with my dad until he started showing many narcissistic traits. The manipulation built up so so much until I had to step away from that one close relationship with him that is now no longer there at all. It upsets me a lot because he is my dad and I still love him but I know he will never change
I have a colleague who was, until about a year ago I also saw as a close and trusted 'friend'. In the beginning I slowly but surely cut out contact with the person outside of work and since then I feel much happier in myself but my work life at times can be miserable because of all the snide remarks I get from this person. Thank you psych2go for this informative video.
Ty for this one. Narc is a hoarder who also erases. They have to obtain as their property everything and everyone relevant to the grandiosity mechanism driving them. The erase part can be broad but it all comes down to them ruining anything you put together or attempt, and especially destroying your speech of self expression
@@milkmaurice1240 I'm a narc, and I question myself constantly. as of late, I realise I'm being egoistic and unfair. still, it doesn't make me less of a narcissist.
@@joeshabe well the fact that you are acknowledging it just means you are evolved and you are trying to do better ❤️🫶🏾 I’m happy for you keep elevating !
Thanks Psy! I always click on your narcissist videos as soon as I can. Learning to cope and validate my experiences with my narcissist started with this channel. Thank you for everything :)
xavier, i recommend blocking this channel if you actually want to learn anything meaningful. the whole “narcs vs empaths” thing is entirely pseudoscience and relies on a lot of ableist rhetoric which unfairly equates NPD with abusive behavior, when in reality it’s a survival mechanism. if short and easy content is what you’re into, i could give you the @‘s to many actual educated people and those who have NPD who post easily digestible information on instagram. this isn’t me saying you’re not a survivor, by the way. i’m sure you are. but lumping in a complex disorder into it is incredibly inappropriate. i hope you can understand.
@@hypnotictrain9767 I actually am against demonizing narcissists, and advocate for their rehabilitation over total ostricization. However, I do not encourage victims of narcissism to "fight" for their abusers. My narcissist was my father, and it took many years to even begin to heal from the trauma I and my several siblings experienced. Psych2go helped nurture that progress. I've heard people say that their content is superficial, but I'd like to say that its accessible. Due to my interest in psychology I've looked into several other sources for more in depth explorations of psychology, but I have nothing but praise for a channel that made it so easy to better myself
@@xavierdillon7023 I agree with Xavier. Just because this channel isn't the most reliable. Doesn't mean you can't get some information from it. I go to other sources to see if it backs up this information. I wouldn't say take this channel with a grain of salt, but I wouldn't say to heavily relay on it either. It's best to do more in depth research.
@@xavierdillon7023 ofc but narcissism isnt what defines an abuser, keep in mind of that, their actions, traits and behavior is what makes them an abuser
@@beepboop2842 That's a good distinction, but the type of abuse, narcissism, is a huge factor in how the trauma is resolved and dealt with. Not all alcoholics are abusers, some are just struggling, but children abused by alcoholics face a specific set of challenges from said abuse. They're not causally linked, no, but it is definitive to the type of abuse
I recently left a relationship with narcissist. It took me a year to realize what was happening. I saw the red flags and, I wasn't sure. Unfortunately, it was quite a damaging experience.
My sister has always been abusive. She definitely shows these signs of narcissism and whenever she "offers" an apology, the immediate thing she does is say: "Now, aren't YOU going to tell me how sorry you are, as well?" Or she would say: "I am sorry I didn't react the way YOU had expected".
The worst, sorry I understand as I’m in the same situation. Wish girls with narc sisters could meet up and have a girl chat because it’s hell to deal with especially when others don’t understand
Apart from not seeming to understanding that narcissistic tendencies exist in all people to some degree and that that we only avoid being problematic if we are aware of why we do things this is one of the best descriptions of a narcissistic personality I have found. It can be genetic but the problems can come from trauma or addiction. And often we accept bad behaviour in order to not have to raise our own game. Self growth hurts us but to not do the work necessary hurts others.
My father never really understood why i stopped visiting him, the second to last time i saw him he made a big deal about my transition. His wife (not my mom) also joined in and really only blamed me for things and basically just cornered me with questions and bland statements of things they read on the internet. He still texts me and i text back and he always says he misses me, and while i miss him i know he'll just start asking more questions.
Chances are he was shocked about the transition and had no idea how to handle it leading to him handling it poorly. That's a plus that he still cares about you, some are disowned when doing what you've done. That sounds like a relationship that can be mended. Consider it, maybe.
The moment the Narcissistic apologized to me, when I told him 'I dont trust you any more, you are no one to me but my bf friend, bcs I know you are a liar and manipulative person" his response was: yes, I have a problem! I manipulate people but I don't want to, help me, you saw me through the mask!" (After years of abuse, of course, what else he could do? We were alone, thats why he sayd that to me)... And in spanish "lo mandé a la verga"
Tener una familia con varios narcisistas ha sido una escuela dura, pero de ello he sacado lo mejor aunque cuanto ha dolido, mis mejores deseos para quienes pasan algo similar. Trabajen en su amor propio y establezcan límites, eso ayudará. 💗
my dad is a narcissist and it is so tiring to deal with every day. he checks off every single point in this video. the worst part about him and the situation is that he is a doctor. he is constantly receiving complements and that is all he ever talks about. every day.. every sentence. its all about him, he has absolutely no care for humans at all. he thinks he is above everyone and it is very noticible. it can show through seemingly small things like taking up two parking spaces but it can get to the point where he does whatever he wants whenever he wants regardless of the rules. this is not only rude but can also be dangerous. an example would be his driving. he drives on both sides of the road, doesnt obey traffic laws, speeds, etc. the worst part is that he uses his doctor position to "get him out of trouble". i remember we got pulled over one time because he was speeding and he started kissing up to the officer and then saying like "im a doctor you know that white collar people like me arent the problem" etc etc. he is just the most entitled person like i swear this man is like a male karen smh. after i graduate college i am cutting all contact with him and my mom (who is also an absolutley horrible person). obviously they arent good people and being in contact with them will be of no help to me. so yeah sorry for the paragraphs lol just thought i should share.
I just recently stopped dealing with someone who displayed a lot of these traits. He also displayed a lot of antisocial personality disorder traits. I had to take off from work just to deal with the trauma and my depression. I am happy to have finally found a therapist so that I can have help healing.
2:52 my grandmother once called my sister a snot ass just because I didn’t want to pack up my sculpting tools because i was still sculpting with them. She said that in front of me and my sister, then later she came back and she was like “im sorry but you can’t just get mad at little things all the time” to my sister and then my sister said “you called me a snot ass” and my grandmother replied Saying “I did not!” I really badly wanted to say “actually you did” but I was too scared to
Highly needed a video Reasons behind their behavior either it is their childhood ignorance,bad upbringing, because they bully and taunt other as if they suffer in childhood or what......
These 11 things are EXACTLY what my ex-hubby &` my ex best friend me. It's like Narcissistic people hunt down Empath just to torture. It is just so sad how some people enjoy hurting people & push, the blame onto the Empath. But the Empath will win,.
And heaven forbid that you stand up to them - they will break down and STILL expect you to be there for them! My (I now realise narcissistic) ex-wife said to me before I left her "I am not going to try to make you come back to me - you have to realise that you WANT to come back!" The day I divorced her I told her that she had never given me anything worth coming back for...
My narcissist got himself arrested and it was the BEST thing that could have happened to ME! I was able to escape before he could become physically abusive. In only 28 days my world was flipped upside down. It’s been 3 years, he was released due to Covid, and now I’m scared AF!
After seeing many of these videos. I can identify that I have narcissistic tendencies. And all I keep reading is that it's not possible to change for me. I am trying every day. Every single day. I hope I can change because I do not want to cause anyone so much hurt. I now understand how much hurt I have caused before to people I love. Thursday is my birthday and I want to gift myself the ability and commitment to change for people around me... Pray that I do.
Ah I feel like I was a narcissist but happily I am not a narcissist rn. Gtk that but I still have some toxic traits in myself. Thanks psych2go for letting me know these things
Hey dude, that's not quite how it works, NPD is quite a complex disorder and it's not something that you can stop or start being it often derives from early childhood trauma and quite often runs within families.....
It sounds like you most likely don’t have NPD, you may just behave narcissistically on occasion. Everyone does, it’s part of normal human behavior, in fact. We all can act like a narcissist sometimes. But that’s not the same thing as having NPD. As the other commenter said, it is a complex personality disorder that usually stems from childhood and yes, there is also a genetic component to this as it often runs in families. For someone to develop NPD it usually is caused by both genetics and/or environmental factors (i.e., how they were raised). A person with NPD is known as a “type B cluster” as in the empathy area of their brains are smaller than a person without the disorder.
@@kaymuldoon3575 Oh yea, maybe it was because of a friend of mine. She was very toxic to me. That made me narcissist for a short term. Tysm for spending your time on writing this
@@kaymuldoon3575 it's quite common for someone who has been close to a Narcissist to mimic there traits as it's the rawest form of human nature and narcism technically is a survival for the person....
I have a father who I'm 95 % sure is both narcissistic and borderline, and I see him in a lot of your videos about narc behavior. BUT I also know someone who was diagnosed with narcissism a few years ago, and I would've never clocked her as a narc! She may have some insecurities, but she is so sweet and funny, and super social. And she is getting therapy and treatment for her disorder. People like her may be few and in-between, but I think it's good to remember that, although some people may be unlikely to change, it doesn't mean that they can't change.
I was manipulated by someone in a romantic/sexual context. I often feel dumb for letting myself get manipulated, but these videos remind me that some people truly are masters of manipulation. I don't know if the person was a narcissist but they definitely had some of the qualities mentioned. Mostly I was just used for their own personal gain. It's hard for me to speak to people about this who haven't experienced it because they tend to be judgmental and not understand. It's nice to have space here to share.
I was hoping the first sentence "its used as a buzzword" couldve been a bit further discussed. Because yes, people throw this around way too much. Similar to gaslighting, people just diagnose without actually knowing whats the real meaning behind it. Its annoying
Hi everyone. How are you? :(
Hi, I’m good you?
good
Best day of my life
How is life treating you?
Pretty sure that I'm a narcissist after watching this
Why the sad face?
Narcissists always gonna give you up, let you down, run around and desert you. They always make you cry, say goodbye, tell lies and hurt you.
Y u gotta Rick Roll me here of all places? NOWHERE IS SAFE
This was more painful to read than it ought to be
@@Silverburstnelson FR
Next level of Rick rolling 🤣🤣
When you realize that narcissists are just embodiments of the anti-rickroll
0:28 They will never apologize to you or admit that they were wrong.
1:08 They will never tell the truth.
1:40 They will never forgive or make peace.
2:18 They will not listen to you.
2:45 They will not take responsibility.
3:15 They will not seek help or professional support.
3:54 They don’t address the difficulties they have with emotional stability and manipulation.
4:34 They will not act selflessly.
5:08 They will never provide you with any sense of safety.
5:34 They will never let you go.
5:52 They don’t want change.
Opposite of Rickroll
Why would you do this? These YT creators work hard on their videos.
Thanks!
That's That's mom
I could of stopped a robber who was stealing 3 pairs of shoes by chucking my phone at the back of their head like throwing an axe close range
The the store was famous footwear
What are the chances of the person steals my phone
@@mamapoch1915 a time stamp won't affect the creators at all. We'd still have to see all the ads and stuff even after jumping forward. It just makes it easier for us watchers to skip to the important part and RUclips themselves has this time stamp feature. It doesn't affect the creators at all!
The narcissist I dated for 3 years would always say I was too sensitive, when I would bring up their behavior, they would also NEVER apologize when they were clearly in the wrong. To a point that I had to use text messages in exchanges and they denied those were real. She made me question my sanity and memory by gaslighting me to no ends of the earth. Glad to be away and healing through therapy as it really did a number on me and trusting myself and my reality.
I'm so glad that you were able to get out, and I hope you get the help you need. You got this! I believe in you.
Same. When I said anything she has done wrong she would say that im being too sensitive. To the point i believed for a long time that i was indeed too sensitive. In the end it would turn to me apologizing for the manipulative things she did. Looking back at it now I wish i got out of the friendship sooner. I hope u feel better now and know that u deserve better.
Thank you for sharing. Sorry you had to experience such a toxic relationship. Happy that you found therapy that helped you. What advice would you give to your younger self?
Waw. Thank you. What a trip.
@Psych2Go honestly, get out at the first sign, don't take someone's diagnosis as means to let the abuse continue and don't be afraid. They hoover me now but are trying to steal my friends. So far have stolen one good one from me
I had a "best friend" that was a narcissist, they manipulated me and made me feel guilty and miserable my entire childhood and early teenage years. Even now after a few years of blocking contact with them I still feel the affects of their actions on me every day.
Yes, narcissistic abuse can last with us. It's as bad as being bullied. How are you coping with your experience at the moment? Do you see a therapist?
@@Psych2go yes I do go to therapy for a few other reasons but that is a big part of it
Holly Molly. That is intense.
I believe in you, you can live again and help those in suffering.
@@Psych2go can we PLEASE get a video on what are the effects of being with a narcissist person ? And how to cope with it ? PLEASE
I totally understand. I went through the same thing.
“When a toxic person can no longer control you, they will try to control how others see you. The misinformation will feel unfair, but you stay above it, trusting that other people will eventually see the truth just like you did.” - Jill Blakeway
What really makes me mad is that they’ll never genuinely apologize without throwing in a manipulation tactic but they feel SO entitled to their own apology and will make you feel like the worst person in the world if they don’t get it, doesn’t matter if they did that and worse to you, it’s always your fault.
That is why I didn't apologize off the bat with her because she did exactly that
@@Kain_R_Heinlein I’m so sorry you had to deal with that
Yes exactly. I was manipulated into doing and saying things to someone that I would never have done or said otherwise. Then when I realized that it was going too far I tried to cut it off but the person manipulated me into feeling so badly about it that I ended up crying and apologizing. I feel for you too if you've had that happen. It's so messed up
The thing is, what if it really is YOUR fault? There's a thin line here....I think everyone just wants to make an excuse for narcissism because they don't want to admit to their wrongdoing. Just saying so in general, not directly to you. People argue all the time and both sides want to be on the right.
My ex gf always was right even though it was crazy obvious she was wrong many of the times. Hell, I once admitted to her I was wrong in an argument and left it at that and then she would rub it in my face that I was wrong and gloat she was right. Kept going on, like further twisting that knife in the back where I eventually said "ok, it's over....I get it. Why keep making it worse? Just move on."
Exactly! This is what makes me so mad when I'm asked to apologize it means that they have won and got what they wanted people don't seem to understand this when the victim of narcissism is forced to apologize the victim is not getting any benefit out of it but the narcissist is The narcissist thrives off of chaos and pain and by apologizing it shows them that they can do whatever they want to you with no consequences which is why I get so angry when I'm told to apologize to them congratulations you took whatever little confidence that I had left and gave it to them and now they're going to walk around thinking that they can get away with whatever they want and nothing is going to stop them
I kinda disagree with number 1. There are different types of narcissists. The covert narcissist may apologize when spoken to in a calm and communicative manner and say all the things they know you want to hear. Only to turn around and act the same way they always have, and likely gas light you when you call them out.
I was thinking the exact same thing
Thank you for saying this, I have been burned by a covert narcissist so many times because I fell for their apologies. They gain your trust by seeming sincere, then attack you again later. It’s a cycle. 💔
Yes
Yes!!!
@@quillfairy same here. They give you a fake apology such as “I’m so sorry. I missed you so much and I was in so much pain when you left!” So honestly #1 is varied
Bruh my imposter syndrome be so bad that when people say “narcissistic people don’t think their narcissists” my brain goes “but what if I’m lying to myself about thinking I’m a narcissist and I actually am a narcissist!”
Edit: a lot of people are talking about how some narcissists do know their narcissists. Yes I am aware that people like this exist and that people with NPD are still people. Another thing people were pointing out was that if I show traits of NPD I should talk to someone about it. I don’t, my self esteem is just so bad that I think giving myself any self care or self love makes me a narcissist. Just because you love yourself and enjoy your own company dosent make you a narcissist. Anyway good luck to everyone, I hope y’all can get trough your mental struggles!
LOL I feel this soooo hard 😂
Fking same
Maybe it's me pretending that i'm concerned about my narcissism just to deep inside think that i don't have a problem with that because "narcissistic people don't think their narcissists"
help
Some narcissists do know they are narcissists. As someone who shows signs of NPD for a long time now and havnt noticed it till somebody alerted me
I can't get diagnosed w npd or bpd cause I'm a minor
“Life is a battle zone in their eyes” I’m literally here to keep it that way in my narc mother’s eyes because of the betrayal with my sister. My mom is literally the reason why I found out about gaslighting and this channel as a whole. That’s one time where the YT algorithm worked in my favour.
My mother is insane too. I’m sorry you’ve had to deal w that. You will always be better than them without doing a thing
This is %100 right, my mother is a narcissist and has done everything in this video at some point in time. Very sad. Sending love to anyone effected by a narcissistic parent. ❤️
My mom too bro…… keep marching soldier.
You guys aren't alone. My mom also.
My twin sister to a T. Though it has progressive gotten worse as we've aged. I think her long-term drug addiction has exacerbated it. Could this happen?
my sister is a narcissist; she has destroyed our entire family- i feel you.
My mother too. I’m now on my second round of healing myself.
The Never telling the truth part really resonated with me.
I've told enough lies in my life to the point where I can no longer tell the difference between what's real and what I said was real. I hate when people figure out or question my stories because I know that they will loose trust in me if they learn the truth. My whole life is based on lies and I truly wish that I can make things go back to normal, but alas, I may live forever with a backstory that isn't mine.
same.
That is awesomely courageous of you to share. You have great creative talent. I want to read the nex episode. How does is story fall apart and he is left standing un touched. discovering he could not be a thought or a feeling.
Sooo exciting.
Keep posting i really appreciate.
My mom and grandma would slightly bend the truth and end up with compleat lies.
As someone who had been on the recieving end of such tactics, it's nice to see the other side sharing their feelings about this. Thank you for being so open and vulnerable about something that may not get much understanding.
I hope this doesn't get taken the wrong way but maybe it's as simple as telling the truth. Try it with small things and work your way up to the big stuff. It's going to be hard and very uncomfortable at first but it will easier get over time. Think of it this way, the fact that you are able to be this vulnerable means that these lies have been disturbing your peace for far too long. The anxiety of being "found out" or exposed, trying to remember all the lies, etc. Is it worth it? You deserve better than that and you owe it to yourself to at least try to see how it goes. Much love and respect to you 😊
@@FutureFendiFsnista Thanks mate, I'll take your advise to heart. People like you prove that the internet really can be sweet at times.
Brave!!
if you confront their wrong doings you'll get a response like "im sorry you feel that way" - basically putting it back onto you, while showing no accountability or regret.
I was narcissistic but not nacissistic personality disorder. It stems from insecurity and the way I overcame this was by peeling off the layers of my own self and looking at myself honestly even if it feels awful. I challenged myself by doing martial arts and getting myself humbled when sparring with people better than me.
Being narcissistic is not bad as long as you’re not malicious, have empathy and you can prove what you boast. Don’t let this narc education undo you like it’s doing me. Keep your confidence! It’s also how you protect yourself from the monsters
Vegeta?
Sorry no time for these people, I've walked away and never looked back. Known these people past good few years.Ive carried this for a long time and leaving them was best thing I've done so far this year! They just bring you down to a certain level that you start to question yourself. Not worth the tears n anguish.
I had a good friend who was a narcissist. We’re no longer friends (I ended the friendship) as I was tired of the verbal abuse. Nothing was ever her fault - it was always mine. I was done.
You deserve better. And at least you don't have to worry about the stress that it all put you through. I wouldn't deal with that either.
Yes I was in the same boat sad as I was friends with her for over 35 years
@@charmainehanlon7444 How are things now?
@@johnbakasmoothhotchocolate yes agreed
@@zurqarasul hey there. It's nice to meet you
Nearly ten years after getting the monster out of my house, I still hear his constant insults in my head. Everything I do, everything I think, he's there insulting me every step of the way. That's the worst thing about such people. They live in your head forever.
It must fade at some point? Its been two years without mine and he still pops up but its much less than it was at the beginning. Somehow they manage to burrow themselves into your mind and soul but i believe in healing and digging them out
You must accept that you allowed it to happen. If I was stuck in that position again and I had to make the choice of living with a narcissist or death, I would gladly bathe in their blood.
But hey. Once you come to terms with the fact that you allowed it, you allowed yourself to lie to yourself after you convinced yourself of the truth. Then you can begin to repair the damage and fix your problems.
As humans we are capable of the worst evils, or the most unconditional love. We choose. And they chose the life of denial and abuse. You can't not save them, but you can save yourself.
No no no... ten years?? Evict that mfer and move on. God you must be miserable
This literally describes my ex-girlfriend. I was questioning my sanity after we broke up but I'm glad that I bumped into this video. Their manipulation skill is really on another level.
Narcs gaslight you and put their own opinions on you. And make it seem like they know your thoughts. Their entitlement is absolutely disgusting.
@@R2C2__ Very true, I never imagined that this would happen to me but learned a lot from it.
22 years with NPD wife...your points spot on. Hardest part for me was to accept there has NEVER been any real love from her. Have left for good and filed divorce....moved to Ecuador....finally finding peace.
you guys always make me realize that i have a narcissistic mother and that i need to get a therapist👁👄👁
And to get far away from her as possible 💕🙏
so relatable
Literally same. I didn't realize she was until I was 25 I was so brainwashed from the lifelong gaslighting. Suddenly SO much made sense. It's rough having that kind of mom. My heart goes out to you, I'm sorry you're going through it too ❤
Kudos
that’s common
Being pregnant while having a narcissistic partner was the worst thing EVER. Being yelled at (while body changes and being so vulnerable) and being told it’s all your fault that the male is gaining weight is the ugliest feeling. I could go on and on. But it was the WORST. As my body was changing the narc acting like I was now gross and non attractive. He didn’t even like to touch my belly to feel the baby move around when the baby was growing. So thankful I studied and found protection from being belittled and abused.
I hate to see so many people who can relate to this like I can 🥺. Over the years I’ve been able to grow past the trauma that a narcissist can cause I Just hope the same for you all 💜
I’m glad I spot the signs so easily now. I’ve been watching videos and reading about narcissism for days and it’s like watching me talk about my experiences… I hope anybody dealing with one finds the strength to cut them off. Going no contact or at least minimal contact is the only way, since they will never change.
I still need to research more in narcissism and gas lighting
(Creats an alternate reality that makes you act in there favors)
So true. Goodbye to my family of origin, good riddance!!
In some, rare, instances one cannot cut off the narcissist. Not without losing something or someone important to them. It sucks. It hurts. It’s frustrating. But sometimes you have to humor and basically enable the narcissist; you have to apologize for things you shouldn’t have to, keep your mouth shut when they start touting their self-inflating BS, and just agree with everything they have to say if you want to keep the peace. It’s exhausting, but sometimes (sadly) necessary.
Ecactly right! Stay strong!
I feel like having a parent with narcissistic tendencies can affect how you act as well. My dad definitely has a lot of these things, the majority of the, actually. I noticed that sometimes, children with parents who have narcissistic tendencies can take after those traits. So, if you ask yourself “am I a narcissist?” You’re probably not and you’re probably just taking some of their tendencies without wanting to.
Sometimes, people will act like their parents when faced with a situation similar to theirs. An example: I have ADHD but my father always denied me having that, despite me having a diagnosis. He keeps questioning me and doubting me about the majority of my diagnostics and disorders. So often times, when I have a friend say they think they might have the same disorder as me, my first thought is going to be similar to what my dad tells me. I make sure not to air those thoughts out because I know they can be hurtful but those are always my first thoughts. Just doubting and questioning cuz that’s what my dad always does
That is truly sad 🥺 just know that deep under the layers of influence from ur dad , u r still in there. The original u who will think twice about saying something hurtful. ❤ love urself u got this
Waw. You have some good self controle and good judgment. 👍
Nature is the best medicine ruclips.net/video/4b6OkMkGyRA/видео.html
Same my mum loves her image
Yeah I agree, though I think it can be broader than just parents. If either of my parents is a true narc, my mom is. My dad mainly just has a lot of unaddressed trauma he deals with very poorly, including with some narc things. Over the course of the 25 years I interacted with them before cutting them off, the scariest part was how easily they took on each other’s manipulation strategies-especially my mom since she was clearly doing it more consciously-and used that to very symbiotically create and reinforce their own reality.
I somehow managed to get my narcissistic mother into therapy recently. She asked me to book a session with my therapist. My therapist was shocked to hear that my mom wanted an appointment with her and also was proud of me for convincing my mom because the therapist had been trying since last year. It's a long story about how did that happen and it conflicts with 6. Narcissists do not seek professional help. I no longer know if my mom really wants help or she just thinks that my therapist is the reason why I'm keeping my distance from her and wants to know what happens in my sessions. And I've already talked to my therapist about this topic.
@@MiBookaholic I'm so sorry to hear that. I doubt that she truly wants help... She is really manipulative. I've already warned my therapist about it and she told me not to worry, she'll deal with my mom.
Another thing I've heard of narcissists doing is going to therapy for very few sessions and then claiming they "went to therapy" in order to try to prove to others that they've somehow changed.
@@krishtikaneerahoo5040 Even if your mom doesn't truely want help, I'm glad that she is willing to go. Even if it's to save face, at least your therapist would be able to see what you are up against and guide you better. That is a lot of work ahead of you, but it will so be worth it! From a stranger, I'm proud of you and rooting for you! Good luck!
@@Cupcakee4 thank you Elena 💖. Your support means a lot to me
@@krishtikaneerahoo5040 It is great your mother tries out therapy. You will soon realize if she really wants to change or Not. Be Patient. Stay Strong.
Even if one is a narcissist, everyone can change if they really want to. So it does not really collide with point 6. You can ne narcissistic but seek help, If you realize that the way you are does not make you truly happy. It is rare with this personality but it happens ♥️
My father is an extreme narcissist and struggles with BPD, as well as many other things, so you could imagine how my childhood was.
There were a lot of messed up things he did in my childhood that I previously thought was normal until my parents divorced when I was 13, nearly 14, in 2018.
We were financially unstable when I was a child and he was a workaholic, so he was never really present in my childhood, but I still looked up to him and thought of him as an idol in a way. Even after all the horrible things he's done, which I'll explain below.
But when he was home, he would mistreat me, my mom, and my three sisters.
My father would lock me and my older sister outside all day while he was gone at work without food and water, telling us to dig a hole in the dirt and fill it back up multiple times until he returned home after the sun was down. He did this all year long and my little sister brought food to us in secret.
He would also force us, children under six years old, to carry heavy bricks and build walls in the back yard as punishment - just to kick them down and force us to do it again and again and he even went as far as to make my older sister sleep outside in the dark, knowing that there were opossums, wolves, raccoons, and bears thriving in the forest in our backyard.
He would also shove full bars of soap into our mouths when we talked back, making my little sister - who was two or three at the time - have a severe allergic reaction and she had to be rushed to the emergency room. He would also put us on 5-minute timers to eat full dinner plates of food or he would force feed us or beat us with his belt or the metal end of a fly swatter. And looking about it, it makes sense why three of the four of us have had eating problems, even to this day; The last thing I remember him doing was he used to lock all of me and my sisters in the small bedroom we shared - again, without food and water - the whole day and we would scream and cry, hungry and desperate to use the bathroom within the 6-10 hours we would be locked in there.
It wasn't until later that I found out why my mom never helped us was because she was experiencing crippling depression because of my father and literally *couldn't* get out of her bed.
My parents fought a lot but I never knew why he would sometimes leave and not come back for days, even weeks sometimes. Now, my mom has told me why and my childhood made a lot more sense knowing that he had been cheating on her for their entire marriage, up until he decided he didn't want to deal with the guilt and divorced her - leaving her to support four daughters with no career experience. She worked at Chick-fil-a, miserable and I remember her sobbing in the car every day because she was worried about losing the house and having nowhere to go. Not to mention the $32,000 debt he left my mother in, which the IRS didn't care who's debt it was and took the money anyway, giving her unredeemable low credit so she will never be able to buy a house and has us stuck in renting.
The house *was* taken from us, and so was our car, and her dad helped us pay to stay in an apartment until he died of a heart attack three months later, my father said to my mom at his funeral that he "felt bad for divorcing her right before her dad died" and not for everything else he caused. If that isn't the most narcissistic thing someone could say, I don't know what is.
He proceeded to verbally abuse me and my sisters, my older sister taking the brunt of the abuse until her therapist told her not to keep going to his house anymore, which he still takes out on us to this day and accuses her of making things up.
My younger sister and I were his favorite victims of his verbal and emotional abuse after that, calling us "little spies" for taking pictures of his nasty house and the lack of food he had, which has affected my appetite to this day. He screamed at us and told us how during the beginning of the divorce, he wanted to unalive himself because he didn't see us, calling us selfish, and turned the wifi off so we couldn't call our mom. (Which was not allowed in the custody agreement. We are supposed to have the ability to contact with both parents 24/7.)
Now, after a year and a half of telling my dad, I never wanted to see him again, he's remarried and is corrupting my youngest sister's (who is 13 and considered his "golden child") mind by telling her we don't love her because she's pansexual and we won't accept her (despite me being asexual and my whole family knowing). Currently, he's trying to go to court so he won't have to pay child support for my older sister who's 19, and me, who's 18 soon, despite him having skipped over a whole year of paying child support and for our education like he's required to and my mom can't find someone to take her case and sue my dad.
Wish us luck.
And thank you for letting me rant, none of my friends understand my situation.
im so sorry you had to go through that
Am so sorry 😞 you had to endure so much could not imagine that praying for you sweet child and hope you can find some peace god bless and all your sisters🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻
That's a psychopath. But all socio and psychopaths (anti social disorder) are narcissists, not all narcissists are socios or psychopaths.
Also likely borderline, which gets confused with bipolar. Borderline switches from decent to angry in an unexplainable heartbeat.
Bipolar is when someone is up for 5 days without sleep , happy , enthusiastic confident, then crashes... sleeps for days , depressed , etc
Hope this helps. I'm sorry for your childhood . I relate . And reading your story helps me know I'm not alone. 💗💪🔥
Just to clarify - you are right - definitely disgusting narcissistic that I completely relate to and feel your pain. It's just to clarify not only is it narcissism , I'm in the process of processing my relatives who I've been calling out for narcissism are actually psychopaths. My niece, daughter of narc , said "her mother (my sister) is more evil than a narcissist. I think she's psychopath."
Takes time to process. Sounds like what your dealing with too . Wishing you healing as well ❤️✨
As someone that also experienced his childhood with a narcisst as father, I can easily imagin what you went through psychologicaly. I hope you and your sisters will stay as strong as you are and will succeed in your lives and get the happiness you deserve. The tunnel has always an end. Keep going forward
TIMELINES:
0:28 They will never apologise to you or admit that they were wrong.
1:08 They will never tell the truth.
1:40 They will never forgive or make peace.
2:18 They will not listen to you
I've accepted that I have many narcissistic traits. I'm working to overcome the conditioning I learned as a child from parents with high degrees of narcissism as well. I'm no longer blaming them for the problems I have today, but recognizing where I learned some of these "skills" is important for growth.
I know that I've hurt people and I've been trying hard to forgive myself and others every day
sucks. I realised I was a narc many times before. still, I manage to forget about it and find a new victim every time. tired.
There is also the side where “they are ALWAYS absolutely right, and you never are”, and also the “me me only me” thinking 24/7 which is exhausting…
Tell me about it. I have been living with this my entire life and literally whenever there's heat between me and someone, I'm always the one to get pinned and every witness acting like it's objective that my opponent did nothing wrong and that I'm the one who ''started it''. At this point, those who love to pin the blame and act like they are 100% fair so much are the real devils around but noooope, reality always SOMEHOW finds a way to ''prove them right''
Gaslighting is the absolute worst...
@@frostlightningx1636 yeah I know what you mean,lol. I was just thinking about this, how in “every scenario” if something goes wrong it is always my fault (even when I am not even involved) 😂
I'm surrounded by narcissists and always afraid I'll pick up on their behaviours and ways of thinking
Run 🏃🏻♀️!!!
it’s possible but if you have a strong heart and healthy mind, you will know better by habit to not pick those up
They'll rot your soul. They'll make you mean and angry just like them. Don't participate, just watch.
Me too!
Same. I think I've already developed some behaviours of it unfortunately.
NEVER EVER an apology.
You can never win with them, it’s like talking to a wall. This relationship whatever it is family or romantic it destroyed you to the core 😢
To tell you the truth it is possible to win with them. But it's hard and depends what kind of narcissist they are. I was with a narcissist boyfriend for a long while. He was extremely abusive but tried to be deceitful through acting nice. It mentally destroyed me but my best friend tried to get me out of that relationship making me realise. I managed to make alt accounts and all so my bf couldn't watch me and I made him believe I'm not online when I actually was having fun with my friends or lied I wasn't meeting them when I was and much more. Everything he was putting me down for I managed to cover and lie back to him making him believe I was listening when I wasn't. I got away with many things and this way we both were satisfied. Soon I realized I should be with someone I don't have to lie to with nearly everything as it was exhausting and stressful. I then broke up with him again playing a victim making him believe my parents didn't want us to date anymore made up some proof. He freaked out cause I wouldn't be his planet anymore and tried to badly get back with me giving me gifts and all to earn me back to manipulate me. I didn't come back. He still tells my friends how unfortunate it is and how it's my parents fault lol. After a while he got with a new gf but she soon broke up with him. Now I'm with a much better partner (my best friend who got me out of it) and my narcissistic ex got over me but is all lonely.
@@orin9920 wow I’m happy that you finally find someone better for you .
My dad would be a narcissist and abusive I ran from him. And ended up with the cops. I lived with mom for like ten years.
Glade you got help, narcissist can be harmful and manipulative. I hope you have a great day :)
@@Minnowhasnomeaning thank you
Literally me a month ago
@@NinesOwnGoals lol
👍
All of these points are why I am careful how much time I spend around my father. I have learned to say no more often to things....and be consistent with my boundaries. Don't let people walk all over you!
I deal with a narc who will readily mutter "I'm sorry", but there is clearly zero remorse. It feels like it is just two words they learned that they can say to move on to the next topic.
TW: Abuse: I like to watch these and reflect on why my stepdad was such a narcissist. I remember I wasn't able to tell anyone about the abuse my mom faced bc of immigration and when she died he told me about her mentally struggled and said " I don't know why you didn't want to help her or be there for her " he even proceeded to lie at her funeral about what an amazing marriage they had.
Watching these helps me realized that I should stop gaslighting myself and understand these people are real
I had a friend like this,she is gone for mine and my best friend's lives for good.
Wish I would have seen this video 4 1/2 years ago... ex-BF had all 11! I could have saved my tears and heart ache. That relationship finally ended with my escape and the ONLY way to get out of a relationship with a narcissist is TOTAL ghosting!!!!!
Ended a 30 marriage. Until I started going to therapy I didn't realize I was in a toxic relationship with a Narc (or at least a person with a Borderline Personality Disorder). It has taken a lot to get past the trauma and damage, but the past year has been very blessed and getting better. Thanks to videos like these, it has helped me understand more of what happened and how to move forward.
This is my grandma and half of my family on my dads side. It’s sad but I’m glad I don’t have them in my life. I’ve always struggled with a few diff mental illnesses and they made it so much worse. I’m grateful for myself and my strength to not allow them Into my life. I won’t tolerate people like this even though I have my whole life until a few years back. It took everything in me to cut my grandma off but I knew I needed to do it. I feel so much better now💜 thanks for bringing awareness to this it’s so important!
''You are the problem, you are the bully, you are the bad guy, you are the embodiment of selfishness. Forgiveness is earned, and you haven't earned it yet. You are a child and need to be taught humility.''
Nope, still didn't forget...
Yes, it is true that I can make missteps but whenever I try to back down or elaborate I only get ''You started it'' like I'm the only one who made a mistake...
It’s a personality disorder that requires an awareness they have it and therapy/inner work to change the behavior. I had a boyfriend that has it. All the patterns in his past relationships were the same as with me. I was the villain and everyone thought he was just the greatest, yet I was constantly trying to please him. My mom is also one and we were estranged until she was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s and I had to take care of her. She didn’t talk to me my whole teen/adult years, even when we lived under the same roof. I never knew what I did wrong and I was a good kid, always trying to please. I’m in therapy once a week because I had a mental breakdown taking care of her in my home and I’m still trying to figure out how not to feel guilty. The ex? I wouldn’t shed a tear if he died. Sounds mean but he put me through hell
😥sending you love and peace ❤💕💓
@@darrenoconnell9716 Thank you, Darren 🥰
i cut my dad out. no matter what illness he has, i have no feelings towards him and wouldn't have a single care if he died miserably. change starts with you. you deserve to be happy
pls dont demonize a disorder. literally find a new buzzword. i doubt ur bf had npd armchair diagnosing ppl is fucked up
The ex? I wouldn’t shed a tear if he died : SAMEE
Also they are addicted to their head games, lying, hostlility, inner anger, being manipulative, blame shifting, vindictiveness and torturing their victims. They will not stop.
Observe don't absorb and once you know you go you get out and you stay out 🙏 and don't ever let them stay rent free in your mind.
I'm so glad that this video exists. My ex girlfriend keep telling me that I had narcissist disorder in a moment of my life that I has a streak of success at work and I was feeling proud of that. She was so convinced because she "studied it" that I believed her. I keep telling myself that I need to change and try to undermine anything good l did. Even after breaking up with her. I still believed that she was wright and I was narcissist. This video helped me a lot to get a little of mental peace. Thanks.
My sister to a T. Once I was exhausted and she responded "well we're all exhausted...". She also will throw temper tantrums on a dime when something doesn't go her way. I swear, being around her is like being next to a lit fuse and just waiting to see what kind of outburst happens next. I'm starting to set boundaries and tell my family "no" for my own well being though.
It’s unfortunate that a lot of narcissists will never take the steps to change. It’s hard for both the people they’re hurting and on themselves. I have diagnosed npd and alot of what was said in this video is true. I have to fight against alot of this everyday and constantly work to have functional and healthy relationships with people. I don’t think people realize that narcissism is a serious mental health issue that causes constant intense emotional pain for the people who suffer with it. You truly feel like you can’t trust anyone and have to constantly be on the defensive. I wish more people with npd would learn to look inward and try to help themselves. They’d be so much happier. Ever since I started really trying to fix these issues and work on building my empathy my life has improved so much and my relationship with my girlfriend, friends and family have gotten immensely better. It’s definitely possible for narcissists to get better but they have to really want to.
How can I deal with a npd sibling who can only thrive when I’m down (from her constant betrayal)? Your answer as someone with this diagnosis would be very helpful
I have a narcisstic personality disorder. Some behaviors operates unconciously and i‘m mostly aware of them but somestimes i noticed them to late. It‘s like those traits are so embedded they are a part of me.
yep. people without npd never tell us when we've done something wrong which is why so many of us are painted as bad people unknowingly.
My mother and my x husband are both narcissists. After I went no contact with her, she teamed up with my x and they are trying to take my children. They are wicked lunatics
Stay strong 💪 💕
The thing that the narcissist in my life would always say was, "I can't make you feel anything. You are in control of your emotional responses." Keep in mind, I was a child and this person had a history of emotional abusing people. It was always so frustrating and it took me years to realize that this was just wrong. The power they had and the fear they used on me deeply impacted my emotions and to deny such a thing was just more gaslighting. I'm so glad I'm a way from them. Coming up on 5 years now.
If you're a child then you clearly wouldn't have control of your emotional responses but as you get older and develop logic you do.
@@Atypical-0 my point exactly, thank you
Only recently I've realised that I was with a person who was a narcissist and they spoiled what was supposed to be the best five years of college life. I hope people recognize and try to move on from these narcissist for the better!
Sincerely they spoiled my four years of undergraduate indeed they are very sick to the core but never admit they’re wrong
Describes my mother quite well. I've been years with no contact and have not looked back. Life is much happier.
Had a recent ex accuse me of narcissism and I think they were probably gaslighting. These vids helped me feel a bit more human. Pretty sure I just had rejection sensitivity dysphoria.
I've been harassed by some of the worst narcissists alive, and, unfortunately, my situation doesn't allow me to simply take my leave of them.
So as a man of experience, these traits always go together.
If you experience a single one, your fight or flight response _will_ kick in. Don't ignore or minimalize it. Fighting them is always to be preferred unless they are a kickboxer, but if you feel the need to get away, do it and don't look back.
To anyone who's ever experienced gaslighting or narcissism, my heart is with you and I'm praying for you.
Stay strong, my loves, and never take any shit from anybody! 💗
I had two so called friends that were total narcissists, they gaslighted me and another close friend of mine all the time
Valuable information. Agree with so many points eg criticism.Hard to break up with these people unless you keep busy and distracted.
I'm currently trying to leave the orbit of a narcissistic romantic partner. this one was a big oof when Amanda said "they will not let you go"... my heart sank... that's exactly what it feels like and the way I love makes leaving so hard... I know she'll never change but she has my heart and I'll always wish she would... luckily, therapy has at least helped me begin to drift away from her
Iam there now I think. I just really want to make it work, change, find a solution. It must be so painful for her to be unable to really trust anyone, I want her to trust me, i have told her so often. Nothing works, except doing exactly what she wants... I hope you are over it.
The biggest problem for me when dealing with narcissistic people was my own _psychological projection._
Basically I wanted to see the good in everyone, and tended to excuse bad behaviour as an aberration rather than something Intrinsicly part of them.
I thought that by modelling good behaviour in myself, their narcissism would fade away.
It took me decades to realise that these people just don't think that they're doing anything wrong, so they are never going to change.
I felt very naive when I finally realised what I was doing wrong.
Now those narcissistic people have been cut from my life. No contact anymore, and I'm a lot calmer and happier for finally doing that.
Bottom line: Some people really don't care that they cause hurt in others, and just because I sometimes accidentally hurt others, and then I try to fix what I did wrong, doesn't mean that everyone else wants to fix the hurt they caused too.
I've been scared that im a narcissist for a long time, because my ex claimed i was one. I was scared because i hate the idea im doomed to hurt people forever, i was pretty sure i wasn't but the anxiety that i was never went away, but thanks to this video im sure im not, especially because of the part about how narcissists rarely self reflect, self reflection is something i do constantly, cause im so scared im gonna mess up or that i did mess up
Your ex sounds like a gaslighter..keeps you scared and doubting yourself.
Felt this…
Everybody hurt ppl at some point I think I’m a narcissistic but i really like staying alone there’s nobody to hurt I enjoy making ppl happy but not at the cost of my own happiness so I stay away I have friends but I keep everybody at a distance
A narcissistic person just left me and did all these things and he was my childhood friend. This video made me cry
Yes! My last relationship was 100% this. It’s been really hard to identify it and come to terms with what was happening
All these videos about narcissists..it's like watching a video about my younger brother. I'd hate to lose his gf as a possible sister-in-law because I love her so much, but she deserves so much better than the controlling, gaslighting jerk my brother is. Thank you for creating these. it also helps solidify any uncertainties I've had in the past when I've been made out to be the bad one when he did something awful.
I was actually a narcissist from as young as I can remember till 8 years old when I moved to my current school. Almost everyone in the new school is warm, positive and genuinely friendly(something I never received at my old school). So I slowly became more aware of myself even though I didn't admit to my behaviour at the time(didn't know narcissists exists). It was a hard process with so many little steps, but it's definitely worth it! I am now proud of myself for having succeeded in this much progress and achieving true happiness from my friends/families. It has been almost another 8 years since I transferred, and I'm still working on improving my inner self and social skills(which r abt 2years behind my peers). Hopefully, narcissists will begin to realize themselves and their thinking even if it's a slow development! it would've helped with stress levels loads for them and others too :))
I think the reality is you have narcissist traits but a real narcissist doesn't become a new person while changing schools lol
Excellent video, thank you. From my experience, I noticed my acquaintance who is definitely a narcissist, NEVER says "please" or "Thank you", and when approached by me saying; "hey a simple please wouldn't hurt", he said; "Please is for strangers". I thought that was very telling.
Sadly, my dad falls into this category. My mom has told me that he is a narcissist, but regardless, I still love and forgive him. It gets hard cause he married a narcissistic woman, my step-mother. But to those of you in the same boat, you’re not alone. Find something or someone you truly trust and find comfort in them. This always seems to help me! Also, if you need to vent, there’s a good song called “narcissist” by Avery Anna!
I am sorry. I always had a good relationship with my dad until he started showing many narcissistic traits. The manipulation built up so so much until I had to step away from that one close relationship with him that is now no longer there at all. It upsets me a lot because he is my dad and I still love him but I know he will never change
I have a colleague who was, until about a year ago I also saw as a close and trusted 'friend'. In the beginning I slowly but surely cut out contact with the person outside of work and since then I feel much happier in myself but my work life at times can be miserable because of all the snide remarks I get from this person. Thank you psych2go for this informative video.
Thank you so much for the great content! Keep it up!
Ty for this one.
Narc is a hoarder who also erases. They have to obtain as their property everything and everyone relevant to the grandiosity mechanism driving them. The erase part can be broad but it all comes down to them ruining anything you put together or attempt, and especially destroying your speech of self expression
I was afraid of being a narcissist for no reason, luckily for me this has calmed me down & I feel better about myself.
A narc wouldn’t question themselves ❤️ so you’re fine
@@milkmaurice1240 I'm a narc, and I question myself constantly. as of late, I realise I'm being egoistic and unfair. still, it doesn't make me less of a narcissist.
@@joeshabe well the fact that you are acknowledging it just means you are evolved and you are trying to do better ❤️🫶🏾 I’m happy for you keep elevating !
@@milkmaurice1240 thank you, love, I'll do my best.. 🤍
I always get: 'I'm sorry, but (insert justification) " - that's not a real apology
Thanks Psy! I always click on your narcissist videos as soon as I can. Learning to cope and validate my experiences with my narcissist started with this channel. Thank you for everything :)
xavier, i recommend blocking this channel if you actually want to learn anything meaningful. the whole “narcs vs empaths” thing is entirely pseudoscience and relies on a lot of ableist rhetoric which unfairly equates NPD with abusive behavior, when in reality it’s a survival mechanism. if short and easy content is what you’re into, i could give you the @‘s to many actual educated people and those who have NPD who post easily digestible information on instagram.
this isn’t me saying you’re not a survivor, by the way. i’m sure you are. but lumping in a complex disorder into it is incredibly inappropriate. i hope you can understand.
@@hypnotictrain9767 I actually am against demonizing narcissists, and advocate for their rehabilitation over total ostricization. However, I do not encourage victims of narcissism to "fight" for their abusers. My narcissist was my father, and it took many years to even begin to heal from the trauma I and my several siblings experienced. Psych2go helped nurture that progress. I've heard people say that their content is superficial, but I'd like to say that its accessible. Due to my interest in psychology I've looked into several other sources for more in depth explorations of psychology, but I have nothing but praise for a channel that made it so easy to better myself
@@xavierdillon7023 I agree with Xavier. Just because this channel isn't the most reliable. Doesn't mean you can't get some information from it. I go to other sources to see if it backs up this information. I wouldn't say take this channel with a grain of salt, but I wouldn't say to heavily relay on it either. It's best to do more in depth research.
@@xavierdillon7023 ofc but narcissism isnt what defines an abuser, keep in mind of that, their actions, traits and behavior is what makes them an abuser
@@beepboop2842 That's a good distinction, but the type of abuse, narcissism, is a huge factor in how the trauma is resolved and dealt with. Not all alcoholics are abusers, some are just struggling, but children abused by alcoholics face a specific set of challenges from said abuse. They're not causally linked, no, but it is definitive to the type of abuse
My dad is a narcissist, sadly we all got the verbal abuse a lot and it’s been a year since we finally escaped. This brought me back tons of memories
I recently left a relationship with narcissist. It took me a year to realize what was happening. I saw the red flags and, I wasn't sure. Unfortunately, it was quite a damaging experience.
They don’t care about anyone. Never say sorry. They can be the bully/victim on same topic. Oh, a whole bunch of lies .!! Be careful..
My sister has always been abusive. She definitely shows these signs of narcissism and whenever she "offers" an apology, the immediate thing she does is say: "Now, aren't YOU going to tell me how sorry you are, as well?" Or she would say: "I am sorry I didn't react the way YOU had expected".
The worst, sorry I understand as I’m in the same situation. Wish girls with narc sisters could meet up and have a girl chat because it’s hell to deal with especially when others don’t understand
Apart from not seeming to understanding that narcissistic tendencies exist in all people to some degree and that that we only avoid being problematic if we are aware of why we do things this is one of the best descriptions of a narcissistic personality I have found.
It can be genetic but the problems can come from trauma or addiction. And often we accept bad behaviour in order to not have to raise our own game. Self growth hurts us but to not do the work necessary hurts others.
Thank you for always posting such informative videos! ❤
“they will never provide you with any sense of safety.” 🎯🎯🎯🎯🎯
My father never really understood why i stopped visiting him, the second to last time i saw him he made a big deal about my transition. His wife (not my mom) also joined in and really only blamed me for things and basically just cornered me with questions and bland statements of things they read on the internet. He still texts me and i text back and he always says he misses me, and while i miss him i know he'll just start asking more questions.
HOPE U GET THE COMFORT U NEED IN UR HURT, HEALING CONTINUES BUT THE HURT WILL STOP EVENTUALLY AWAY FROM A TOXIC HUMAN BEING
Chances are he was shocked about the transition and had no idea how to handle it leading to him handling it poorly.
That's a plus that he still cares about you, some are disowned when doing what you've done.
That sounds like a relationship that can be mended. Consider it, maybe.
Accurate, perfectly said and explained , perfect to open eyes more and take away headache …. The only sad thing on the end when person don’t want help
The moment the Narcissistic apologized to me, when I told him 'I dont trust you any more, you are no one to me but my bf friend, bcs I know you are a liar and manipulative person" his response was: yes, I have a problem! I manipulate people but I don't want to, help me, you saw me through the mask!" (After years of abuse, of course, what else he could do? We were alone, thats why he sayd that to me)... And in spanish "lo mandé a la verga"
Tener una familia con varios narcisistas ha sido una escuela dura, pero de ello he sacado lo mejor aunque cuanto ha dolido, mis mejores deseos para quienes pasan algo similar. Trabajen en su amor propio y establezcan límites, eso ayudará. 💗
my dad is a narcissist and it is so tiring to deal with every day. he checks off every single point in this video. the worst part about him and the situation is that he is a doctor. he is constantly receiving complements and that is all he ever talks about. every day.. every sentence.
its all about him, he has absolutely no care for humans at all. he thinks he is above everyone and it is very noticible. it can show through seemingly small things like taking up two parking spaces but it can get to the point where he does whatever he wants whenever he wants regardless of the rules. this is not only rude but can also be dangerous.
an example would be his driving. he drives on both sides of the road, doesnt obey traffic laws, speeds, etc. the worst part is that he uses his doctor position to "get him out of trouble". i remember we got pulled over one time because he was speeding and he started kissing up to the officer and then saying like "im a doctor you know that white collar people like me arent the problem" etc etc. he is just the most entitled person like i swear this man is like a male karen smh.
after i graduate college i am cutting all contact with him and my mom (who is also an absolutley horrible person). obviously they arent good people and being in contact with them will be of no help to me. so yeah sorry for the paragraphs lol just thought i should share.
Dont feel bad for cutting off contact either
I just recently stopped dealing with someone who displayed a lot of these traits. He also displayed a lot of antisocial personality disorder traits. I had to take off from work just to deal with the trauma and my depression. I am happy to have finally found a therapist so that I can have help healing.
2:52 my grandmother once called my sister a snot ass just because I didn’t want to pack up my sculpting tools because i was still sculpting with them. She said that in front of me and my sister, then later she came back and she was like “im sorry but you can’t just get mad at little things all the time” to my sister and then my sister said “you called me a snot ass” and my grandmother replied
Saying “I did not!” I really badly wanted to say “actually you did” but I was too scared to
Highly needed a video Reasons behind their behavior either it is their childhood ignorance,bad upbringing, because they bully and taunt other as if they suffer in childhood or what......
These 11 things are EXACTLY what my ex-hubby &` my ex best friend me. It's like Narcissistic people hunt down Empath just to torture. It is just so sad how some people enjoy hurting people & push, the blame onto the Empath. But the Empath will win,.
And heaven forbid that you stand up to them - they will break down and STILL expect you to be there for them! My (I now realise narcissistic) ex-wife said to me before I left her "I am not going to try to make you come back to me - you have to realise that you WANT to come back!" The day I divorced her I told her that she had never given me anything worth coming back for...
Oh, phew. I was actually really scared i was a narcissist.
Thank you Psych2Go. I needed this.❤
NP :) Glad this reassured you!
My narcissist got himself arrested and it was the BEST thing that could have happened to ME! I was able to escape before he could become physically abusive. In only 28 days my world was flipped upside down. It’s been 3 years, he was released due to Covid, and now I’m scared AF!
I had a boss who is a narcissist. Even with all of the things I went through, in the end I felt sorry for her. They really have no friends.
After seeing many of these videos. I can identify that I have narcissistic tendencies. And all I keep reading is that it's not possible to change for me. I am trying every day. Every single day. I hope I can change because I do not want to cause anyone so much hurt. I now understand how much hurt I have caused before to people I love. Thursday is my birthday and I want to gift myself the ability and commitment to change for people around me... Pray that I do.
I think I'm unintentionally a narcissist
so am I
I have some of these traits and am working at changing. This is why I am watching.
I’m coming to the conclusion that there is no cure, help or hope for a narcissistic person. Get out, don’t walk RUN 🏃♂️
Ah I feel like I was a narcissist but happily I am not a narcissist rn. Gtk that but I still have some toxic traits in myself. Thanks psych2go for letting me know these things
Hey dude, that's not quite how it works, NPD is quite a complex disorder and it's not something that you can stop or start being it often derives from early childhood trauma and quite often runs within families.....
It sounds like you most likely don’t have NPD, you may just behave narcissistically on occasion. Everyone does, it’s part of normal human behavior, in fact. We all can act like a narcissist sometimes. But that’s not the same thing as having NPD. As the other commenter said, it is a complex personality disorder that usually stems from childhood and yes, there is also a genetic component to this as it often runs in families.
For someone to develop NPD it usually is caused by both genetics and/or environmental factors (i.e., how they were raised). A person with NPD is known as a “type B cluster” as in the empathy area of their brains are smaller than a person without the disorder.
@@kaymuldoon3575 Oh yea, maybe it was because of a friend of mine. She was very toxic to me. That made me narcissist for a short term. Tysm for spending your time on writing this
@@kaymuldoon3575 it's quite common for someone who has been close to a Narcissist to mimic there traits as it's the rawest form of human nature and narcism technically is a survival for the person....
I have a father who I'm 95 % sure is both narcissistic and borderline, and I see him in a lot of your videos about narc behavior.
BUT I also know someone who was diagnosed with narcissism a few years ago, and I would've never clocked her as a narc! She may have some insecurities, but she is so sweet and funny, and super social. And she is getting therapy and treatment for her disorder. People like her may be few and in-between, but I think it's good to remember that, although some people may be unlikely to change, it doesn't mean that they can't change.
Amazing content! Keep up the good work!!
I was manipulated by someone in a romantic/sexual context. I often feel dumb for letting myself get manipulated, but these videos remind me that some people truly are masters of manipulation. I don't know if the person was a narcissist but they definitely had some of the qualities mentioned. Mostly I was just used for their own personal gain. It's hard for me to speak to people about this who haven't experienced it because they tend to be judgmental and not understand. It's nice to have space here to share.
keep in mind that some people who don’t do these things are not automatically narcissists. this is not a professional diagnosis.
Yes, this is not meant to be a diagnosis.
I was hoping the first sentence "its used as a buzzword" couldve been a bit further discussed. Because yes, people throw this around way too much. Similar to gaslighting, people just diagnose without actually knowing whats the real meaning behind it. Its annoying
@@Psych2go well people in your comments are armchair diagnosising their abusers with NPD and youre demonizing us more. but you never listen.
If it walks like a duck, talks like a duck sounds like a duck, feels like a duck how can it not be a duck?
@@aseasonalname1421 Some fursuiter with rad vocals ur mistaking as a duck lmao