After Four Nights Of Nonsense At The RNC, We're Getting Off This Emotional Roller Coaster

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  • Опубликовано: 26 авг 2020
  • Stephen Colbert wraps up two weeks of LIVE episodes with a roundup of the highest lowlights from an anger-filled RNC, which culminated with an epically boring speech from President Trump to a crowd of 1500 maskless souls on the White House lawn. #LateShowLIVE #RNC2020 #Monologue
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Комментарии • 7 тыс.

  • @DrStratComm
    @DrStratComm 3 года назад +73

    I love that there's muffled laughter from behind the cameras at just the right moments. 😂

  • @DavidJ222
    @DavidJ222 3 года назад +505

    This RNC has been one big gaslighting extravaganza. It was a seminar on Russian style propaganda that would have made Stalin proud.

    • @thereisbeautyinthisworld7251
      @thereisbeautyinthisworld7251 3 года назад +36

      I'm sure Putin was happy too.

    • @TheMulToyVerse
      @TheMulToyVerse 3 года назад +3

      After night 2 of the RNC, I made the mistake of replying to a comment saying how positive and uplifting the RNC had been up until that point compared to the nasty hate-mongering of the DNC... 🙄🙄

    • @larazanz
      @larazanz 3 года назад +3

      Rampage7 what did you say?

    • @xmilkshakesx
      @xmilkshakesx 3 года назад

      But what is Megan Thee Stallion?! I love her! ❤️ 🐎 🎶

    • @xmilkshakesx
      @xmilkshakesx 3 года назад +1

      Rampage7 Your username upsets Lizzie. 🦖 🦎 🌩

  • @emilylittle1187
    @emilylittle1187 3 года назад +114

    "This is a glimpse into Biden's America"
    Sweetheart... It's happening in Trump's America. Right now.

  • @oyaoyaoya9099
    @oyaoyaoya9099 3 года назад +149

    when they say "this is a taste of Biden's America"...... uuuuuh who's been sitting in office for 4 years,?

    • @53cr3t4ccnt
      @53cr3t4ccnt 3 года назад +10

      That was just a 4 year hologram. He was in Russia to find a location for his new tower. Lol

    • @gmbligh-shuck8989
      @gmbligh-shuck8989 3 года назад +10

      They think the average voter is stupid and blind that's why they think they can tell folks that this is currently Biden's America. Again Trump absolving himself of all responsibility.....too busy gobbling Mac burgers and watching Fox News.

    • @CT-vm4gf
      @CT-vm4gf 3 года назад +4

      It’s either Obama’s fault or Biden’s fault. He never blames himself, the current POTUS!

    • @captain2ahab
      @captain2ahab 3 года назад +2

      they are trumpanzees. don't try to argue with them

    • @Silvana716
      @Silvana716 3 года назад +3

      That's what psychos do - choose a convenient scapegoat and put effort into publicizing they are "bad" even though there's no logic used, avoid personal responsibility; my father would tell relatives that the bathroom smelled after I cleaned it, that I was worthless (a good job at US Immigration, then a grad student working two jobs, no drugs, alcohol or erratic behavior, which normal parents would be proud of and supportive), I was the reason he couldn't marry his 7 year fiancee, equally a nut, who continued to blame me even after I moved out and they broke up, I was blamed for my family home having waterbugs even though they still appeared after I moved out, and nothing on the floors of my apartment to attract them, called to ask if I ran up a big phonebill, while my brother was the only one who lived with him, claimed I nearly had him thrown out of his own house by my uncles when I never had a word with them and wasn't living there, and along with his equally deranged brother then tried to stop me when I moved out, and called me a "fat bitch" - meanwhile his girlfriend was a few sizes bigger; he had no trouble, however, with his fiancee attempting to make herself comfortable in the hous my mother and he built, even her relatives trying to home in like leeches. I still get angry thinking about the long list of crazy I experienced with him. I guarantee Trump has done this within his own family.

  • @Leelz247
    @Leelz247 3 года назад +84

    “We pioneered the mortality rate?” Wow, words are hard.

  • @censusgary
    @censusgary 3 года назад +257

    “I profoundly accept ...”
    Most nominees say “I humbly accept,” but of course, “humbly” has never been part of Trump’s vocabulary.

    • @VishwaJay
      @VishwaJay 3 года назад +12

      I think he meant "proudly". That's what some of the news outlets reported, anyway. Not the actual word he used.
      But yes: nothing about Trump has ever been humble. He'd have to openly admit that he got it wrong. "It" being "anything of the last 40 years involving anything other than real estate deals."
      And even those, he's only batted about 80%.

    • @meafordmichael
      @meafordmichael 3 года назад +10

      Vishwa Jay Traitor Trump, amongst his many other “virtues”, is illiterate; what do you expect?

    • @sarahcampbell8819
      @sarahcampbell8819 3 года назад +7

      @@meafordmichael
      "THE DUMP" is a LUNATIC. I would rather have Mr. T "I pity the the fool" from the "A-Team" at this point as the POTUS !!!!😫
      NONE of the moron's in the crowd even had DAMN FACE MASKS ON !!!!
      "THE DUMP" HAS TO GO, he's done NOTHING but destroy the country. Left 1000's and 1000's to LOSE EVERYTHING THAT they once had, homes, jobs and freaking lives. How can people be stupid enough to not see any of these things this ORANGE CREATURE has done and still support him ???? Really wondering how much money his firework displays cost US ?? Hope that you are well. ✌😷

    • @waynesmith4120
      @waynesmith4120 3 года назад +2

      YOOOO. SA. MIGHT. (Yosemite)

    • @censusgary
      @censusgary 3 года назад +1

      I just realized his script probably said “proudly accept,” but, as usual, Trump couldn’t read the teleprompter correctly, and, as he so often does, guessed the word, and got it wrong.

  • @christomaszewski1580
    @christomaszewski1580 3 года назад +55

    He's talking about Abraham Lincolin like he's in the same league. Abraham Lincolin freed the slaves, you're making the presidency into a monarchy.

    • @TaurusHere
      @TaurusHere 3 года назад +3

      Actually, Lincoln did NOT free slaves as they were still enslaves until 1865 and beyond and Lincoln was Racist and said Negroes would Never be EQUAL to Whites. With that being said, Trump is still not in any position to evoke Lincoln bcuz he COULDN'T fit his shoes like he will NEVER be able to fit President Obama's shoes

  • @iloveschmuzzies
    @iloveschmuzzies 3 года назад +179

    There's something to be said for the delightful muffled giggles in the background of these recordings. Thank you for that. My props to the snicker-er. You bring me joy in these trying times.

    • @Canuckmom128
      @Canuckmom128 3 года назад +31

      @kazterboro That's Stephen's Wife, Evie. She's been helping with the show since he started broadcasting from home. TONS of feedback from viewers saying she has to be part of the show, now, cuz we all love her giggles. They are a delightful couple.

    • @amymargarethowe
      @amymargarethowe 3 года назад +9

      I’m with you - it makes the monologue almost normal. Plus knowing it’s his family makes it all the funnier. The raspy laugh really got me tickled.

    • @rb7297
      @rb7297 3 года назад +4

      I love listening to Evie laugh! Especially when it makes Stephen start laughing.

    • @rosebud4467
      @rosebud4467 3 года назад

      That's about the only laughs Colberts dumbass will ever get.

    • @rosebud4467
      @rosebud4467 3 года назад

      @@Canuckmom128 You have to be kidding.
      Ewe.

  • @mandelw
    @mandelw 3 года назад +191

    “He is Dorian Grey and we are the picture” that’s deep

    • @pattycake9856
      @pattycake9856 3 года назад +3

      William Mandel that was so funny and so true.

    • @ckandrew
      @ckandrew 3 года назад

      It was one for the word nerds, for sure! 💜

    • @charleswatson1093
      @charleswatson1093 3 года назад +2

      William Mandel Surprisingly , Wilde spelled it "Gray". Descending to the American level.

    • @ckandrew
      @ckandrew 3 года назад

      @@charleswatson1093 crazy! I don't think I ever noticed that, but I've always used the spellings interchangeably myself, and tend not to notice one vs. the other in writing. I will say Oscar Wilde's writing sent me into a phase of writing overly dramatic stories in high school that used the word "settee" far more often than could ever have been warranted...😂
      Descending to the American level... The burn is scorching. ❤️

    • @charleswatson1093
      @charleswatson1093 3 года назад

      @@ckandrew Sorry about that!

  • @slightly_elevated
    @slightly_elevated 3 года назад +48

    "We have pioneered the fatality rate" I'm utterly speechless at how profoundly and incomprehensibly moronic this statement is.

    • @Hotspur37
      @Hotspur37 3 года назад +4

      He was not wrong in that statement LOL highest death rate in the world

  • @user-mu1os7me8s
    @user-mu1os7me8s 3 года назад +153

    "Americans are exhausted"
    That's the only true thing Trump has ever said

    • @gmbligh-shuck8989
      @gmbligh-shuck8989 3 года назад +3

      Maybe you'll be lucky if he gains the Presidency again..he can throw rolls of paper towel at everyone in celebration. Please note I am kidding.

    • @adaangel8585
      @adaangel8585 3 года назад

      Yes they are exhausted. They are exhausted from the media lies. They are exhausted from the fake racism. They are exhausted from the Democrats supported riots they are exhausted from the Democrat Mayors the Democratic Governors they are exhausted. They are exhausted from over three years of trying to tear down a democratically elected president. They are exhausted from a bunch of baby still acting like a bunch of babies even after all this time and absolutely sterile proof that the president has done anything wrong but there's lots of proof that the Democrats have done things wrong but you never hear that because it's against the mainstream media version. Oh yes Americans are exhausted they're exhausted from these young idiots who went to University and instead of coming out with an education came out brainwashed into violent brainwashed leftist socialist.

    • @jacobgraham8363
      @jacobgraham8363 3 года назад +2

      @@adaangel8585 oh honey... I’m so sorry, being that stupid must be hard, you poor thing.

    • @policerthought5649
      @policerthought5649 2 года назад

      @@adaangel8585 Did you have fun storming the Capitol

  • @clearfield2009
    @clearfield2009 3 года назад +76

    Ivanka “American Girl doll that just follows orders” perfect.

    • @gmbligh-shuck8989
      @gmbligh-shuck8989 3 года назад +5

      They are prepping her for government..she fancies herself the next President. When the meeting of the world leaders happened..she tried to chime in on their conversation...in person. What a bubble head.

    • @dsoccer241
      @dsoccer241 3 года назад +1

      She runs multiple companies! She’s brilliant, hard working and drop dead gorgeous! Why you hatin?

    • @dsoccer241
      @dsoccer241 3 года назад

      S D the truth hurts sometimes, it’s okay though I understand.

    • @WakeUpAmerican000s
      @WakeUpAmerican000s 3 года назад +2

      @@dsoccer241 If Ivanka is running multiple companies, why is she collecting a salary from American taxpayers while posing as a White House "advisor"? That's a direct conflict of interest, and it's against the law.

    • @sukiyakiirinza3604
      @sukiyakiirinza3604 3 года назад +3

      jc As a member in good standing, of the, ‘Club Of Women’ (COW), I hereby recommend that Ivanka turn in her vajayjay and resign from the group. She won’t be abandoned. I hear one of her grandparents is an Orangutan!

  • @danmaftei7633
    @danmaftei7633 3 года назад +68

    Not gonna lie, I love this more intimate setting because the staff trying to conceal their laughter behind camera is so much more contagious than audience laughter.

    • @le2800
      @le2800 3 года назад +2

      Don't Maftei. Yes! I know right! I wish it could stay this way!

  • @Jeffcrocodile
    @Jeffcrocodile 3 года назад +305

    "This is a taste of Biden's America"... Wait a minute, isn't that Trump's actual America?

    • @markbriten6999
      @markbriten6999 3 года назад +23

      @LAWRENCE looking from Europe we think there will be mass violence. From Trump support cos he lost and they don't like it

    • @TheMelancholicWriter
      @TheMelancholicWriter 3 года назад +10

      LAWRENCE Found the Trump simp guys!

    • @evawurttemberger4994
      @evawurttemberger4994 3 года назад +8

      Isn't it weird that Trump and the GOP slugs blame the actual total mess in USA to Biden and there are people who believes theese liars?

    • @BrokeredHeart
      @BrokeredHeart 3 года назад +8

      @@TheMelancholicWriter I assumed it was a troll account - it is not. All caps nut job has a lot of saved videos to Christian "save your soul and repent" videos....... and then a weirdly high number of Tom Jones and Paul McCartney music videos. Everyone has their fetishes, I suppose. lol

    • @TheMelancholicWriter
      @TheMelancholicWriter 3 года назад +3

      LAWRENCE Might be hard to win when all his dumbass supporters are dead or suffering from Covid, because they don’t take it seriously and get infected...

  • @akaviral5476
    @akaviral5476 3 года назад +125

    "This is Biden's America"
    I'm sorry, WHO'S in office right now again? Right.

    • @rudylabsilica2286
      @rudylabsilica2286 3 года назад +4

      Aidan ; yeah right, it isn’t just Biden’s America, it’s OUR America. Not one person owns this country, not even that horrible person running this country down right now. So if you’re claiming he owns this country, come November, he won’t be. And every educated, fair-minded voter will make sure of that.

    • @adaangel8585
      @adaangel8585 3 года назад

      It is Biden's America are you forgetting who was denying what was happening? What party is saying that it's peaceful protest and what party said that antifa did not exist? No this is nothing to do with Trump at all. It has to do with Trump hating white hating psychopath.

    • @literatiglee
      @literatiglee 3 года назад +10

      I was planning to make this exact point -- these riots are happening under the Trump administration, not Biden's. Well, let's hope Biden has the chance to have an administration.

    • @literatiglee
      @literatiglee 3 года назад +6

      @@adaangel8585 WTH are you talking about? Are you referring to a single person or just scads of psychopathic people who hate Trump AND hate white people? Your statement is incredibly unclear and if you're referring to the latter, extremely unlikely.

    • @danadams6477
      @danadams6477 3 года назад +3

      @@literatiglee Lol. I agree. I was just thinking the same thing. It's very unclear.

  • @loristewart6141
    @loristewart6141 3 года назад +43

    "The last four years is like Trump is Dorian Gray, and we're the picture!" Truer words were never spoke :(

    • @loristewart6141
      @loristewart6141 3 года назад +1

      @Jon Denver Neither Colbert nor I are unemployed bums, so no idea what you're talking about

    • @oldrrocr
      @oldrrocr 3 года назад +1

      he fell in love with his look after he was made-up with fake tan, hair, hair color... for his game show. And millions of fools fall for this conman. add to that his long addiction to stem-cell injections. you have a 150 pound overweight 11-year-old baby.

  • @NewMessage
    @NewMessage 3 года назад +179

    I wonder how many times Ivanka had to repeat "Don't call him Daddy... Don't call him Daddy..." in her head during this speech.

    • @antoniosaxon8605
      @antoniosaxon8605 3 года назад +6

      Fake-Vanka is a Joke

    • @kenanderson517
      @kenanderson517 3 года назад +2

      She was tutored by the adoring husband of mother.

    • @cweissable
      @cweissable 3 года назад +1

      LOL!

    • @NewhamMatt
      @NewhamMatt 3 года назад +7

      I thought that was the way she got the job in the first place...
      "I want a job in the White House.
      Give it to me, Daddy.
      Give it to me Daddy!
      GIVE IT TO ME DADDY!
      YES! GIVE IT TO ME DADDY!"

    • @jessthehuman
      @jessthehuman 3 года назад +1

      7

  • @randalldavis3251
    @randalldavis3251 3 года назад +335

    "Bone chilling nonsense from America's top trashbags" pretty much sums it up.

  • @chaoslord8918
    @chaoslord8918 3 года назад +14

    "Wyatt Earp, Annie Oakley, Davey Crockett, and Buffalo Bill..." yet another fantastic example of how deep and knowledgable turnip and his base are...n't.

  • @lalakuma9
    @lalakuma9 3 года назад +150

    It's bad enough that America's Endgame is approaching. Then Chadwick Boseman passed away when we need Black Panther the most.

    • @AnabethalightASMR
      @AnabethalightASMR 3 года назад +4

      Lala OMG WHAT?! He died yesterday?!? Why didn’t I hear about this?!! WTF!!!

    • @igorschmidlapp6987
      @igorschmidlapp6987 3 года назад +5

      @@AnabethalightASMR You're REALLY quarantined, aren't you?

    • @1TigerJo
      @1TigerJo 3 года назад +6

      Heartbreaking, and a huge loss at a time when we need humans like him, a giant in heart and spirit, a beacon of light. I watched his Howard University commencement speech today and it was deeply inspiring, uplifting, powerful. There should be a statue of him, a foundation in his name.🌱🍃🌿🥀🌹🥀🌿🍃🌱

    • @sheilahardy38
      @sheilahardy38 3 года назад

      That is totally stupid. He portrayed a fictional character. Trump is not racist and never has been. Chk out Alveda King on RUclips. She is Rodney King Jr.s neice. "It is outrageous to call this President racists."

    • @bronztrooper9440
      @bronztrooper9440 3 года назад +6

      @@sheilahardy38
      Now, see, I might've taken a second to consider the potential validity of your claim, but no one here said anything about Drumpf being racist

  • @colleen3107
    @colleen3107 3 года назад +225

    OMG, the Teleprompters said “I proudly accept......”. He didn’t even correct his reading mistake😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

    • @19lhernandez
      @19lhernandez 3 года назад +15

      Eileen Dover Trump truly is a MORON!!!

    • @mariesinging7654
      @mariesinging7654 3 года назад +20

      Profoundly ACCEPT???🤣🤣

    • @chuckperego2216
      @chuckperego2216 3 года назад +29

      You're right. I pulled the transcript and it was written as "proudly accept" which, of course, would be normal. It was a glaring moment of cognitive malfunction. As that moment was one of the key points in the speech, you'd think he would remember it, regardless.

    • @FiferSkipper
      @FiferSkipper 3 года назад +21

      After the speech,
      Speech writer: I wrote 'proudly'...
      Trump: That's what I said.
      Speech writer: ?

    • @Sam16mee
      @Sam16mee 3 года назад +6

      Eileen Dover lol that’s the best you gave me a reason to smile! Thank you

  • @writewoodcreations7091
    @writewoodcreations7091 3 года назад +192

    I hope everyone got the Dorian Grey reference because that was gold. (Congratulations on five years, Stephen. You are saving sanity every night with your shows.)

    • @mori1bund
      @mori1bund 3 года назад +7

      The "just following orders" reference was kinda dark... ^^

    • @andyrosenthal544
      @andyrosenthal544 3 года назад +2

      For real! I was an English/Philosophy major in college and I was screaming at that line!

    • @martinlouis911
      @martinlouis911 3 года назад

      Explain it for those who didn't....like me lol

    • @seanryan3020
      @seanryan3020 3 года назад +1

      @@mori1bund But en pointe!

    • @martinlouis911
      @martinlouis911 3 года назад

      @@nonyabidness8676 oh ok lol thank you

  • @jedidiahhendricks8572
    @jedidiahhendricks8572 Год назад +3

    Stephen, I don’t know if you’re going to have the time to read this but if you do.
    If we ever run into another lockdown situation and you’re okay with doing the show still, this is a great setting. Your family is the best, your interactions with your crew, the lighthearted zingers, I love it all. Please stay happy, healthy, and safe.

  • @BubblewrapHighway
    @BubblewrapHighway 3 года назад +19

    "No one else looked like they were trying to snort their way to a Peruvian citizenship!" LMAO 🎉👏

    • @binghiboi8004
      @binghiboi8004 3 года назад

      How do Talking Hemorrhoids become Political Humorist? They hemorrhage by shit. Hollywood is their toilet...

    • @BubblewrapHighway
      @BubblewrapHighway 3 года назад

      Fungus will help you. 🍄

  • @christinesmilak2633
    @christinesmilak2633 3 года назад +369

    The presidency aged every ex president and trump aged the whole USA in less than 4 years. Wow!

    • @jazz21977
      @jazz21977 3 года назад +14

      Not just the USA...

    • @Silverfirefly1
      @Silverfirefly1 3 года назад +4

      Well, you can't fix something that you can't see. If it wasn't for all the death, I'd say that 4 years of trauma could be the making of your nation... or the end of it obviously.
      Maturity is painful, nothing is in vain if the lessons are actually, finally learned. That won't happen overnight, though it won't happen at all whilst people are oblivious to what's important and how fast things can change. People are a lot more engaged than they've ever been, whatever comes next will be better informed for better or worse.

    • @cero2277
      @cero2277 3 года назад

      If Obama wanted to look younger he should’ve dyed his grey hair.

    • @FinneousPJ1
      @FinneousPJ1 3 года назад

      Yeah aged 4 years in 4 years wow lmao

    • @MsMary957
      @MsMary957 3 года назад +1

      Funny I was just thinking about that.

  • @theosher101
    @theosher101 3 года назад +1202

    Dear America,
    If this doesn't change on November 3rd, the entire world will never forgive you..
    Sincerely,
    The rest of the world

    • @elizabethwhite1068
      @elizabethwhite1068 3 года назад +89

      We're really trying! Just keep posting this exact message. Thank you!

    • @antoniosaxon8605
      @antoniosaxon8605 3 года назад +37

      The Other Virus- US Republican Conservative Senators
      Featured (Sena)Traitors: All Below; Weak, Do Nothing, Fake Conservatives, who for Stand Strong for:
      Destroying the US Postal Service so Their Master, Donald J Trump, can take away Americans Constitutional right to vote.
      All turning their backs to America and allowing Russian and other Foreign interference in US Elections.
      Protecting their own power, political interests & wealth.
      Denying a woman’s rights to choose, earn equal wages of men, and speak out against abuse.
      Sexism, Voter Suppression, Health Care for None, Racism and Social Inequality.
      Support of Russia, foreign election interference and destroying the American Military.
      Silence; Weakness. Allow President Donald J. Trump and Bill Barr to destroy the United States
      Constitution, US Rule of law, US National Security & the US Economy.
      The Other Virus are US Senators BELOW. All Need TO BE VOTED OUT OF OFFICE.
      1) (MOSCOW RICH) Mitch McConnell.
      2) Ron Johnson- Wisconsin
      3) Lindsey (LENINGRAD) Graham- South Carolina
      4) Thom Tillis- North Carolina
      5) Cory Gardner- Colorado
      6) Joni Ernst- Iowa
      7) Susan Collins- Maine
      8) Chuck Grassley- Iowa
      9) Steve Daines- Montana
      10) John Cornyn- Texas
      11) Martha McSally- Arizona
      12) Kelly Loeffler- Georgia
      13) Ted Cruz (“No Backbone”)- Texas (Apologies to your wife for allowing Donald Trump to insult her; You, simply fine with it.
      14) John (“kiss my Ass”) Kennedy- Louisiana
      15) Marco Rubio- Florida
      16) Rick Scott- Florida
      17) Josh Hawley- Missouri
      18) John Thune- South Dakota
      19) Rand Paul- Kentucky
      20) Jim Inhofe, Oklahoma
      The Long List of Do Nothing, Say Nothing, Donald J. Trump Puppet Senators is a Disgrace to the United States of America.
      VOTE OUT ALL UP FOR REELECTION IN NOVEMBER 2020 AND THOSE IN 2022

    • @juliekay3662
      @juliekay3662 3 года назад +47

      That's right, we're ALL relying on you America, for goodness sake, get rid of trump, we can't come on holidays to hawaii because of him, you need to get this virus under control. It will take ages, for people to think it's safe to visit again. You must be loosing billions of dollars because of him

    • @marymorgan8282
      @marymorgan8282 3 года назад +43

      My God, that is so true. I beg you America - bring them all down.

    • @TheSCPStudio
      @TheSCPStudio 3 года назад +34

      Did you know Trump lost popular vote last election but was still made president?
      The American people have no true power.

  • @JadeValour
    @JadeValour 3 года назад +16

    When he said, "No one else looked like they were trying to snort their way to a Peruvian citizenship", I choked on my tea!

  • @msjadeli
    @msjadeli 3 года назад +2

    Congratulations on 5 years, Stephen and Crew. Thank you for being there.

  • @archer9784
    @archer9784 3 года назад +200

    “The mirror under your nose” 😂😂😂😂 thank you who ever wrote that.

  • @mariapiaboni
    @mariapiaboni 3 года назад +28

    I'm Argentinian but the thought of a US citizen not voting it's inconceivable to me. There's to much at stake!

    • @elizabethwhite1068
      @elizabethwhite1068 3 года назад +7

      Thank you! Please just keep posting this message. We need all the help we can get!

    • @octavianpopescu4776
      @octavianpopescu4776 3 года назад +3

      @@elizabethwhite1068 Well, how can we help? I'm European, so technically we can't really get involved in campaigning. But I will say this: if I were American I would definitely vote, because I see things, patterns, behaviours in the US, I never thought possible in the "land of the free". It's weird to see such communist mentalities in people who were raised in freedom. We got these things, after 45 years of communism which was imposed on us at gunpoint by the US, UK and USSR after WW2. We never wanted it, never approved of it. But to see this slavish worship of one man by free people... I'm stunned. It's a real-deal personality cult.
      The RNC reminds me of former Communist Party congresses where the leader and his family were praised like they were the saviours of the motherland and without them the sky would fall on us. Trump may point to Sanders and Biden and scream socialism, but having been born in communism, he and his Red Party are the ones that remind me of it.

    • @elizabethwhite1068
      @elizabethwhite1068 3 года назад +2

      @@octavianpopescu4776 Thank you so much for your comments. Can I ask what country you're in? I'm just curious with the description you give. You are absolutely right, about everything. It's scary as hell right now, we are all so stressed out. Not about whether we can get the votes, but that they could steal it again. In broad daylight they're trying to create massive problems to the postal service, and Russia is interfering again because they did nothing to stop them. Seeing the Dumpster and his criminal children and cronies treating the White House like it's his dictator palace is repugnant and extremely upsetting. I could go on but you seem very clear on what's happening. Every word out of their mouths is pure projection. As for what you all can do, make posts like this one anywhere you can. You can't send money but you can encourage people to vote. Early voting will start soon in some states. Encouragement from around the world may just get some people to vote.

    • @octavianpopescu4776
      @octavianpopescu4776 3 года назад +3

      @@elizabethwhite1068 Thank you! I will. I'm from Romania and we had so many Trump-like politicians, the pattern is obvious. In a sense I feel it's my duty to tell people: don't go there! You don't want to go there! We've lived through this and the corruption dragged us down so much.
      He reminds me of Ceausescu's instinct to repress protests and a politician called George Becali. This last guy, is so identical to Trump, from hand gestures, to their vocabulary, to their incoherent way of speaking, to being in the real-estate business, even the campaign slogans sound similar (Make Romania like the Holy Sun in the Sky), both run their families more like a mafia godfather, both have far-right sympathies, both despise educated people, both ran a university, both tried running a sports team... I mean it's like the exact same person, but our guy ran for president twice, about a decade before Trump, but never got more than 2%. And then went to prison for a few years for fraud.
      It's like watching a horror film, you know what's going to happen you scream at the screen, you've seen this before, so many times, but it still plays out exactly like you anticipated and a character dies... this is how watching American politics from the outside is like.

    • @elizabethwhite1068
      @elizabethwhite1068 3 года назад +3

      @@octavianpopescu4776 Wow, that's really crazy to hear. Dumpster has been thinking about it for a very long time. It's unsettling how much alike all dictators seem to be. Your experience could definitely help motivate some people. Thank you so much.

  • @angelinamclaughlin-heil
    @angelinamclaughlin-heil 3 года назад +3

    Congrats on 5 years of Late Show!🎉Thank you for all you and your team do to inform and entertain

  • @SnarlingMaiden
    @SnarlingMaiden 3 года назад +3

    ..."after listening to YOU for 70 minutes . . ." LOL I LOVE you Steven!

  • @laalaa99stl
    @laalaa99stl 3 года назад +39

    Congrats on literally surviving season five, Stephen! Best wishes to you, Evie, Jon, the band, the writers, and the crew. Thanks for helping all of us stay homin!

  • @justhuman24
    @justhuman24 3 года назад +452

    Stephen without you this presidency would have been unbearable.

    • @paulkerrigan9857
      @paulkerrigan9857 3 года назад +4

      True.

    • @shelbyclark4620
      @shelbyclark4620 3 года назад +8

      Please say it isn't true! We NEED you more than ever, Stephen!

    • @namehere2206
      @namehere2206 3 года назад +3

      Sit back buttercup... 4 more years!!! MAGA!!!!

    • @isthisjustfantasy7557
      @isthisjustfantasy7557 3 года назад +7

      @jason cole 😂 what are you on you loser?

    • @mattk6101
      @mattk6101 3 года назад +12

      @jason cole what do you mean "back to Canada?" Colbert was born in the US. You sound jealous of the fact that he's a late show host and you're a nobody who's going back under their rock in November.

  • @facespaz
    @facespaz 3 года назад +20

    "The immigrants didn't know they would be appear at the RNC, they were conned by Trvmp... Congratulations, now you're Americans."
    So true. So true...

  • @davidjscox1
    @davidjscox1 3 года назад +16

    Never thought I’d ever need to say this but the USA needs the United Nations Election Observers to man the polling stations and counting offices, as they do in third world dictatorships, to ensure a free and fair election.

    • @pamelacass9642
      @pamelacass9642 3 года назад

      Unfortunately, I can see Donnie kicking out the UN and demanding DEFUNDING. He's not going to ask for election oversight.

  • @wilfredowen7632
    @wilfredowen7632 3 года назад +43

    Stephen's writers are ab-so-lutely nailing it lately. His delivery is the icing on the cake.

  • @jazz21977
    @jazz21977 3 года назад +73

    "We've had quite enough of D.T. " -The world

  • @Canuckmom128
    @Canuckmom128 3 года назад +95

    "The last 4 years are like Trump is Dorian Gray and WE'RE the picture". Ya...that gets my line of the night award. I'm not even American and 4 years of Trump has screwed my blood pressure and increased my alcohol consumption. VOTE BIDEN/HARRIS 2020. Make sure you are Registered and Vote ASAP by mail, absentee ballot, or bring your camp chair and a lunch on Nov. 3rd. Signed: the rest of the World. Thanks EDIT: PS: Don't forget your Mask 😷

    • @monica766
      @monica766 3 года назад +4

      Here here! From Canada

    • @user-pj8mt2kd4v
      @user-pj8mt2kd4v 3 года назад

      Sorry, my message ...like a bottle with coordinates thrown into the ocean....I hope that someone will read my message and help me!, I hope to find someone who is not indifferent, I myself live in Siberia from Russia, I am 62 years old, I am alone...and I do not understand the Internet..I'm more than a little turned out all right on Facebook...but alas, I was banned...finally (Russophobia) in RUclips do not understand at all....over time, of course, experience will come. so I chose the tactic of sending my messages almost to ugat, in the hope Today, for all progressive, caring people who care about the fate of the planet, the fate of people, the fate of humanity! Today, it is unequivocally and irrevocably clear that warming is the main threat to humanity. It is extremely important to pay attention to projects that can change the situation on a global scale. to stop further warming. The main supplier of gases that provoke warming is a thermal power plant, which burns coal, gas, oil,...and the atom, too!. Exactly my invention…
      Still
      I ask all people who are not indifferent to the problem! to convey this message to interested persons and companies, I Apologize! if you are not interested in my offer I am from Russia .I live in Siberia looking for a sponsor (investor) I ask you to give this information to interested persons, companies..Thank you for reading with respect Popov Gennady.

    • @janistotham-davies4300
      @janistotham-davies4300 3 года назад +2

      Canuckmom1958 I’m not American and I never want to be, and I live in this vile country!

    • @praveensg
      @praveensg 3 года назад +1

      @James Whipple just another generic Trumptard comment with no data to back up.

    • @crosita1
      @crosita1 3 года назад +4

      Honestly I can't decide, "the wrong grail" was pretty awesome too

  • @Mevenda1
    @Mevenda1 3 года назад +1

    “Be best” gets me every time. Lol

  • @jay-el-bee
    @jay-el-bee 3 года назад +224

    "After 4 nights of bone chilling nonsense from America's top trash bags.."
    Nailed it.

    • @siddarthatummala4321
      @siddarthatummala4321 3 года назад +7

      Ieva Wehler The country isn’t nonsense but the President is. Got a problem with that?

    • @letthesunshinethru2355
      @letthesunshinethru2355 3 года назад +4

      @Ieva Wehler Of course you don't, troll.

    • @jay-el-bee
      @jay-el-bee 3 года назад +3

      If you're in support of Mr. Trump and have watched this video, and then proceed to comment on a post from someone with an opposing view- take a minute to ask yourself why. Hint- it's because you want to argue with someone. 😆

    • @chrissiek8706
      @chrissiek8706 3 года назад +2

      @Ieva Wehler taip, Ieva, ir baik nusišnekėt, commiai jai vaidenas mat...

    • @reneolguin1081
      @reneolguin1081 3 года назад +1

      @Ieva Wehler not me...i am not a mother

  • @schoolcraft420
    @schoolcraft420 3 года назад +91

    "We have pioneered the fatality rate"
    -History book

    • @vegasj305
      @vegasj305 3 года назад +3

      Deep thoughts by DJT 2020!!

    • @DS-rt1ed
      @DS-rt1ed 3 года назад

      He's not wrong....we're number one in Covid fatalities...something to be proud of???? 🤔🤨🤒🥴

    • @ofdrumsandchords
      @ofdrumsandchords 3 года назад

      To be precise the fatality rate of America is very low. For once, he's right.
      But you are in the top ten for mortality rate, and you can still win the gold.

    • @expatla8671
      @expatla8671 3 года назад

      @@ofdrumsandchords with their behaviour and the Orange family/team in charge, almost no doubt about this..

  • @moviesovermatterproductions
    @moviesovermatterproductions 3 года назад +3

    Colbert! You get him man! this was HILARIOUS! watching it again and again! X-D

  • @leavingitblank9363
    @leavingitblank9363 3 года назад +4

    Playing with the green screen dress was brilliant. They should have done more.

  • @cloud__99
    @cloud__99 3 года назад +84

    The more exhausted and frustrated Stephen is the more hilarious he gets 😅 Thank you for making this dumpster fire slightly more bearable for us Stephen, it has aged us just as much as it has you...

    • @nicolebrown1927
      @nicolebrown1927 3 года назад +2

      I know!😂😂😂

    • @nadt5547
      @nadt5547 3 года назад +4

      @dmo572 Actually, it's because he worked for and cared about the American people. Your idiot has killed 180,000 souls and it doesn't even faze him. Heartless bastard.

  • @WillBravoNotEvil
    @WillBravoNotEvil 3 года назад +36

    To paraphrase Napoleon, “When your enemy is in the process of committing suicide, do not interfere."

    • @leyrua
      @leyrua 3 года назад +1

      Depends on their method. Suicide _bomber...?_

    • @thomasword5762
      @thomasword5762 3 года назад

      It is now Putin's saying.

  • @pamellatofu4966
    @pamellatofu4966 3 года назад +1

    The last 5 months have been an amazing 10 years! I died! So true, emotionally speaking.

  • @davidanderson_surrey_bc
    @davidanderson_surrey_bc 3 года назад +7

    "...we have pioneered the fatality rate."
    A gold star to whoever can give me the best comment on THAT line.

    • @dizzyonaball4623
      @dizzyonaball4623 3 года назад +1

      Republicans will blame the commas. It should have been, "Thanks to advances we have pioneered, the fatality rate has been reduced by 80 percent" but was spoken, "Thanks to advances, we have pioneered the fatality rate."
      I'd like to have heard how the rest went. "...has-been reduced by 80 percent" would sound like Trump talking about his poll ratings.

  • @radle12000
    @radle12000 3 года назад +34

    Sooooo... when I get a job I can blame everything that’s gone wrong on my predecessor after over three years. And then blame it on someone who may take over my job?

    • @cherylyates9845
      @cherylyates9845 3 года назад +4

      Only if you are an insane sociopath coddled rich boy. Then, yes you can. Do we buy into it? Enough is enough.

    • @33lex55
      @33lex55 3 года назад +1

      If your boss is a Trumptard, it might work..

    • @terrygibson1808
      @terrygibson1808 3 года назад +2

      Radle12000 Let me know if this works Please! LoL And if you get raises. ..

  • @lynndenault4212
    @lynndenault4212 3 года назад +37

    Stephen and his writers nailed it this week. Tuesday was epic.

    • @danivani5978
      @danivani5978 3 года назад

      I'm gonna have to stop right there✋. No they didn't.

    • @soni-switch5270
      @soni-switch5270 3 года назад

      Indeed.

    • @juliannaagoncillo6090
      @juliannaagoncillo6090 3 года назад +3

      @@danivani5978 I'm inclined to agree. It was actually WEDNESDAY's show that cemented the zeitgeist of the 2020 election.
      However, Lynn, I do agree Tuesday was epic, just secondary to Wednesday personally~
      Have a nice day, both of you~

  • @ronanmckeown9785
    @ronanmckeown9785 3 года назад +8

    "...before the end of the year, or maybe even sooner." What? Is he a time-traveller now?

  • @jacoblaughbon3323
    @jacoblaughbon3323 3 года назад +2

    "How can you tell they were on coke?" "I grew-up watching Robin Williams do stand-up." "Oh."

  • @wetbobspongepants
    @wetbobspongepants 3 года назад +34

    After watching the rnc which was so disturbing and anxiety inducing that I’ve decided to relax by watching The Shining.

    • @yoidkldk
      @yoidkldk 3 года назад

      Which version?

  • @kellyg358
    @kellyg358 3 года назад +126

    "Looks like I drank from the wrong grail!"
    This is more true than I want to admit.

    • @negascoot23
      @negascoot23 3 года назад +7

      I know...I feel and look about twenty years older after surviving the ten years of Trump's administration...
      ...wait--it's only been FOUR?
      But what about the six years since the pandemic hit?
      Those were *MONTHS???*
      😵😵😵

  • @SunderlAndy
    @SunderlAndy 3 года назад +3

    That intro to America: Endgame is so freaking brilliant and hilarious.

  • @linnaeusshecut3959
    @linnaeusshecut3959 3 года назад

    The line "say hello to your new neighbor" (Flamenco dancer) was great.

  • @pizdocivka
    @pizdocivka 3 года назад +555

    "This is a taste of Biden's America."
    -brought to you by 4 years of Tump's presidency
    Who is insane here?

    • @rayallensjumper
      @rayallensjumper 3 года назад +39

      Precisely. Pass the blame. Never take responsibility. Zero accountability.

    • @michalvoh
      @michalvoh 3 года назад +4

      Yeah, he (Biden) has only been in politics for the last 50 years. No impact on currenct political climate whatsoever...muppet.

    • @rayallensjumper
      @rayallensjumper 3 года назад +61

      michalvoh last time I checked the senate has 99 other seats. Biden wasn’t a one man congress 😂 nice try tho

    • @rainbowprism6242
      @rainbowprism6242 3 года назад +24

      @@michalvoh yes, just like that "quack doctor" who has been silenced and taken off task force to stop Covid-19 is criticized for not doing enough to stop Covid-19.
      Don't forget your prescription from Demon Sperm Doctor.

    • @rayallensjumper
      @rayallensjumper 3 года назад +2

      Rainbow Prism who was bought and paid for by the oil lobby. Cuz they want the world to go back to normal again and start buying their product once more.

  • @stephaniechung2366
    @stephaniechung2366 3 года назад +286

    I’d rather watch 20 or more minutes of Colbert’s monologue than waste time on Chris Christie.

    • @matthewsarson6934
      @matthewsarson6934 3 года назад +13

      Yeah why even have those people on the show, even if it gives both sides a chance to talk to his audience, one side does nothing but tell provable lies.

    • @nicolebrown1927
      @nicolebrown1927 3 года назад +6

      I know. It's really annoying.

    • @nikolaipersad4098
      @nikolaipersad4098 3 года назад +2

      💯 agreed!

    • @ericrenz6074
      @ericrenz6074 3 года назад

      RIP Isaac Kappy

  • @steveg9863
    @steveg9863 3 года назад

    Love you Stephen. Thank you dearly for wearing the weight of staring into the darkness that you may offer it's visage with a little levity. And your staff, they no doubt make a team effort of that burden and polish it up nicely. Thanks again, take a breath!

  • @Lucius1958
    @Lucius1958 3 года назад +3

    Well, we're off the emotional roller coaster of the past few weeks...
    Now, on to the Emotional Out-Of-Control Tilt-A-Whirl that is the run-up to the election...😱🤢🤮

  • @coosoorlog
    @coosoorlog 3 года назад +46

    "I profoundly accept"... oh no someone gave that swamp thing a thesaurus

    • @robelmurph
      @robelmurph 3 года назад +3

      You think he's smart enough to open that up? It probably was a paint-by-numbers word of the day calendar.

    • @sandraaustin1282
      @sandraaustin1282 3 года назад +2

      Reader's digest word of the day or it was on his day planner, word a day.

    • @honeste6652
      @honeste6652 3 года назад +1

      And when they did, he exclaimed, "Oh, boy! A thingasaurus! That's my favorite dinosaur!"

    • @victoriabaker4400
      @victoriabaker4400 3 года назад +6

      Apparently the teleprompter script said "proudly", which his mouth changed to profoundly. I say "mouth" because there is no brain engagement.

    • @theeviloverlord7168
      @theeviloverlord7168 3 года назад

      Please don’t. He’ll be using endless synonyms without any regard for connotations.

  • @heartofdawn2341
    @heartofdawn2341 3 года назад +80

    Calling riots on the streets in Spain "Biden's America" fails on so many levels:
    * It's the wrong country
    * rioting is happening right now, in Trump's America
    * If Biden **was** to blame for this crisis (he's not), it simply tells us that Trump is so weak that even as president, he's letting someone else call the shots.

    • @bradleywylie3823
      @bradleywylie3823 3 года назад

      trolling with some fact free youtube channel is pretty lame

    • @chloekey8043
      @chloekey8043 3 года назад +2

      Bradley Wylie trump is trolling America. Not only is the rioting on his watch-he’s in charge, what goes on is his problem- his crew makes it all look worse by showing scenes from Spain! Not only is he unfit to serve, he has to be dishonest and lie while he’s telling lies!🙄

  • @eileenedmonson9485
    @eileenedmonson9485 3 года назад

    Stephen Colbert every day I thank God for your brilliance and sense of humor. I don't think I could have made it through these dark days of DT's administration without you.

  • @vgerlightening3944
    @vgerlightening3944 3 года назад +7

    "VOTER EXTINCTIION" ABSOLUTELY HILLARIOUS, SUPERMAN GENIUS.

  • @kristine6324
    @kristine6324 3 года назад +37

    "We threw up a little in our mouths..." - SC - 😂

    • @sunnydaze2359
      @sunnydaze2359 3 года назад +2

      Kristine : My God. , does anyone have a more monotonous tone than him ? His voice actually hurts my ears.

  • @okzoomer5728
    @okzoomer5728 3 года назад +44

    "We have pioneered the fatality rate"
    Trump just admitted that he loves bigly body counts, oof. Took him a while to tell the truth for once.

    • @JennyverseLive
      @JennyverseLive 3 года назад +2

      @@robsuffridge9298 Whatever, 'Rob'.

    • @le2800
      @le2800 3 года назад

      What Eva. I know right! Great one!!!

    • @le2800
      @le2800 3 года назад

      @ Rob Suffridge. What Biden said is that THIS isn't his America. It is TRUMP'S. It began UNDER Trump and is continuing UNDER Trump while TRUMP stands by and let it happen. So he can tell obedient sycophants like yourself that because it is happening in Democratic led cities and Biden is running as a DEMOCRATIC president then low and behold it MUST belong to him. Let me explain to you, THAT is NOT how the world works. When natural disasters took place or shootings took place Obama nor any of the other presidents ever said it wasn't their problem because it was in states that aren't Democratic or Republican. No one except that infantile Trump has EVER tried to separate the U.S. like that, except maybe Nixon.:-) All Biden is doing is placing this mess squarely on the shoulders of the man who deserves it.

    • @ClipsTVUSA
      @ClipsTVUSA 3 года назад

      Rob Suffridge that’s a modified link, you think people are that stupid.

  • @mannoubouba9204
    @mannoubouba9204 3 года назад +1

    whenever i see Trump talking i remember Peter Ustinov as Nero in Quo Vadis!!

  • @uhu597
    @uhu597 3 года назад +202

    I think the original phrase was probably something like, "I'm profoundly honored to accept..." But after the tenth time Trump has bungled saying it, his aide just changed it to "I accept..." But Trump likes how "profoundly" sounds, he just adds it back himself, thinking it would make him sound smart.

    • @dancingwithnature5303
      @dancingwithnature5303 3 года назад +3

      Or how about "I am profoundly humbled as I accept..." trump being humble was such a revolting idea to him that he would've had a stroke contemplating saying it.

    • @michaelwinter742
      @michaelwinter742 3 года назад

      Edit: profoundly smart.

    • @a.lerner8468
      @a.lerner8468 3 года назад

      HE WILL, NOT ELECTED BUT HE WILL BE "SELECTED" FOR ANOTHER 4 YEARS.....THOSE IN POWER WANT HIM THERE.

    • @gwenreader6631
      @gwenreader6631 3 года назад

      Sort of like that liberty mutual ad

    • @kashiaroundtheworld
      @kashiaroundtheworld 3 года назад

      That's sounds like an accurate assumption 🤣🤣🤣

  • @mlongoria124
    @mlongoria124 3 года назад +85

    One of best byproducts of the pandemic...
    Steve, and wife/producers stuck in a small room keeping the country laughing!!

    • @daddylongdreads
      @daddylongdreads 3 года назад +1

      It’s priceless right! I feel like they need a show together😊

    • @dancalindi
      @dancalindi 3 года назад

      @@daddylongdreads They do have a show together. It's called A Late Show with Stephen Colbert 🤣😂😂. Just kidding, sorry, I couldn't resist.

  • @LeftIsBest001
    @LeftIsBest001 3 года назад +1

    _"It look's like I drank from the wrong grail... HeLp!!"_ 😂😂😂 4:07

  • @brendabiffibaldovino8306
    @brendabiffibaldovino8306 3 года назад

    Thank you very much❤❤❤

  • @MA1.5
    @MA1.5 3 года назад +135

    “Pioneered the fatality rate.”
    What does that mean?

    • @aevelynmoose609
      @aevelynmoose609 3 года назад +1

      REDUX OKTOBERFEST SING ALONG WITHOUT THE STEINS OF BEER.

    • @thekububeach
      @thekububeach 3 года назад +3

      Hahahaha he invented the rate .. and it’s beautiful

    • @leonwright8643
      @leonwright8643 3 года назад +3

      First to discover the secret for the mass killing of Americans! A real pioneer!

    • @Cathyblj
      @Cathyblj 3 года назад +2

      It means that he profoundly pioneered the moribund rate of fetal abnormalities.

    • @Hailstormful
      @Hailstormful 3 года назад +3

      Well, America DOES have the highest body count in the world for COVID cases... maybe that's what he meant?

  • @robharris9406
    @robharris9406 3 года назад +113

    He's made the White House look like the Nuremburg rally grounds.

    • @architech02
      @architech02 3 года назад +3

      In a few months it will look like the nuremburg trials

    • @Resologist
      @Resologist 3 года назад +4

      No, the Nuremberg rallies were much better attended, better choreographed, included a spectacular lighting (the Lichtdom, or "Cathedral of Light"), military displays, and had better speakers. It was so disappointing that the 11th Party Congress was cancelled at the last moment, when the "Rally of Peace" was interrupted by the invasion of Poland a day before its opening. And, who would want to bore their audiences by filming a long-winded speech by a pathological narcissist? Certainly, not Leni Riefenstahl. And, it's "Nuremberg."

    • @bowdencable7094
      @bowdencable7094 3 года назад +2

      Melanie helped by destroying the Rose Garden.

    • @architech02
      @architech02 3 года назад

      @Dahn they will all disown trump the same way many of hitler's generals disowned him

  • @tracypeter7216
    @tracypeter7216 3 года назад +1

    You crack me up, Colbert! Thanks dude!

  • @CrazyBear65
    @CrazyBear65 3 года назад

    _"Now you're American!"_ I laughed my ass off. (Really, it fell on the floor, I had to glue it back on...)
    Love ya Steve! God Bless you, brother! Keep doing what you do.

  • @helveticaification
    @helveticaification 3 года назад +90

    Love the half- stifled off- screen giggles. Will miss them after The Plague.

  •  3 года назад +63

    The background laughs and back and forth banter between Stephen and his family is far superior than the canned laughter of the studio audience. Could just keep the Home Late Show

    • @FaithyFrometa
      @FaithyFrometa 3 года назад +4

      Facts. Same for Trevor Noah over at the daily show. They don’t ever need to go back to the old style

  • @scottrowe533
    @scottrowe533 3 года назад

    Colbert, mocking Junior's claim that his eyes appeared very glassy because of "something with the lighting": "Yes, the lighting! I think it must have been reflecting off the mirror under your nose!" _HAH!_ 😂

  • @privateprivate5302
    @privateprivate5302 3 года назад

    Colbert is top of his joanin game! Glad I saved this vid 'til my lunch break! I SO needed these laughs!

  • @NewMessage
    @NewMessage 3 года назад +40

    It was pretty apt that the background accompaniment to Donnie's speech was sirens blaring in the distance.

  • @DaveLugo79
    @DaveLugo79 3 года назад +58

    "Well, I’ll tell you the funniest is that before a show, I’ll go backstage and everyone’s getting dressed, and everything else, and you know, no men are anywhere, and I’m allowed to go in because I’m the owner of the pageant and therefore I’m inspecting it ... I sort of get away with things like that."

    • @nadt5547
      @nadt5547 3 года назад +6

      Creepy, sad and true.

    • @wendym2192
      @wendym2192 3 года назад +2

      Pepperidge farms remembers.

    • @flyeaglesfly94
      @flyeaglesfly94 3 года назад

      Yep I also heard he liked playing inspector at EPSTEINS parties until one girl walked in and reminded him of his daughter. She said "I was chosen not only because I was still a virgin and new to these parties, but also he told me I reminded him of his daughter who would have been around the same age as me. It was the way he said it that creeped me out it wasn't a naunchalant way, but more of a sexual way with a mmmm. Then fast forward to one of the late shows when Donald was asked what do you and Ivanka have in common? Expecting an answer as such she's a hard worker great business mind you know all the made up lies he told about himself, NOPE Donald's answer came right out with no hesitation "SEX". Now this surprises everyone including Ivanka who looked so embarrassed and then he starts to talk about her beauty and how sexy her legs are that she got from her mother etc..I also love how they think AMERICANS are so stupid I know there are some still being duped but a lot of them are waking up just as I did he is a conman that is a DICTATOR WANNABE AND A RUSSIAN PUPPET TO PUTIN, RUNNING AN AD WITH ALL THESE RIOTS AND SAYING THIS IS A
      BIDEN/HARRIS AMERICA IS TOTALLY RIDICULOUS THESE RIOTS ARE HAPPENING RIGHT NOW UNDER YOUR WATCH TRUMP THIS TRULY IS A TRUMP AMERICA AND IT WILL BE WAY WORSE IF HE IS REELECTED!! This is why every vote for BIDEN/HARRIS must make sure we get them in ASAP and every vote matters so much this time. LET WE THE PEOPLE TAKE BACK OUR POWER AND SEND A CLEAR MESSAGE THAT WE WILL NOT ALLOW TYRANNY, AUTHORITARIAN AND A DICTATOR WANNABE WHO TAKES THE WORD OF A HOSTILE FOREIGN LEADER OVER OUR MEN AND WOMEN WHO ARE OUT THERE PROTECTING US FROM POS LIKE PUTIN AND KIM FROM N KOREA. THIS IS WHY IF YOU SUPPORT TRUMP YOU DONT GET TO CLAIM HOW PATRIOTIC YOU ARE YOU MAYBE BE ABLE TO CLAIM HOW RACIST YOU ARE BUT NOT PATRIOTS. WHEN THE SH$T HIT THE FANS YOU CHOSE TO STAND WITH EVIL INSTEAD OF USING THE SECOND AMENDMENT TO FIGHT AGAINST THESE EXACT KIND OF TAKEOVERS THAT TRUMP IS TRYING TO ACHIEVE AND THE KICKER IS HE DOESN'T CARE ABOUT YOU ONE BIT IF YOU HAVEN'T NOTICED. CORONAVIRUS HE IS TESTED SEVERAL TIMES A DAY ALONG WITH ALL THE OTHER PEOPLE AROUND HIM, WE IF WE CAN GET A TEST IT THEN TAKES 6-14 DAYS TO SEE RESULTS, WE NEED TO GET BACK TO WORK AND SACRIFICE OUR SELVES FOR "THE ECONOMY", THIER ECONOMY WHICH IS THE STOCKMARKET (MONEY before LIVES), THEN WANTED US TO SACRIFICE OUR CHILDREN NOT THIERS THEY ARE STAYING HOME SCHOOLED, NOTHING TO DO WITH EDUCATION ITS SO THAT BOTH PARENTS CAN WORK AND NOT WORRY ABOUT DAYCARE WHY SAME REASONS (MONEY OVER LIVES), THEN HE CUTS FUNDS TO DEMOCRATS STATES AND CITIES WELL THERE'S STILL A LOT OF SUPPORTERS THAT ARE REPUBLICANS IN THISE AREAS OH YES WERE TALKING ABOUT TRUMP WHO DOESN'T CARE ABOUT YOU HE JUST WANTS TO CON ANOTHER VOTE OUT OF YOU TO REMAIN IN POWER SO HE CAN KICK DOWN THE WORKING CLASS AND POOR WHILE HIM AND HIS PEOPLE (THE TOP 5% OF WEALTH IN AMERICA) CAN KEEP SUCKING MONEY OUT OF THE COUNTRY AND ENJOYING THIER HUGE TAX BREAKS. THEN THERE'S THE POSTAL SERVICES WHERE HE ONCE AGAIN SH$ITS ALL OVER OUR CONSTITUTION AND UNDERMINDING OUR DEMOCRACY WHERE WE ALL DEFEND ON OUR MAIL WEATHER ITS TO GET BILLS PAID ON TIME OR YOUR MEDICINES. YOU SEE REPUBLICANS THIS IS NOT AN ELECTION TO DO WITH BLUE VS RED ITS LITERALLY EVIL VS GOOD. NOW THAT IT'S CLEAR HE JUST USED US FOR OUR VOTES THEN DID ABSOLUTELY NOTHING FOR THE WORKING CLASS AND POOR AND INSTEAD THE LAST 4 YEARS HAS BEEN NOTHING MORE THAN ENRICHING THE MILLIONAIRES BUT ESPECIALLY THE BILLIONAIRES WHILE WE ARE THE ONES RISKING OUR LIVES EVERY DAY TO ENRICH THESE PEOPLE ITS SICKENING AND DISAPPOINTING THAT SUPPORTERS THAT ARE POOR OR HARD WORKING REPUBLICANS DONT SEE THROUGH THE LIES HE SPEWS OUT EVERY DAY. PLEASE CHECK OUT THESE TWO GUYS ON RUclips THEY ARE PEOPLE WHO GOES OFF OF FACTS AND BREAKS DOWN WHO TRUMP TRULY IS AND GLENN IS A PROSECUTOR FOR THE WASHINGTON D.C. AREA FOR OVER 30 YEARS AND IS CURRENTLY TEACHING LAW. WELL FIRST UP IS "GLENN KIRSCHNER VIDEOS ON RUclips" AS I SAID STRICTLY A LAWMAN AND HE TELLS US WHICH LAWS ARE BEING BROKEN NOT ONLY BY TRUMP BUT ALSO HIS FAMILY AND HIS ADMINISTRATION ALONG WITH THE REPUBLICANS IN THE SENATE. SECOND UP IS A STRAIGHT UP AMERICAN WHO DOES CONTRACT WORK ON THE GOVERNMENT'S BEHALF SUCH AS TEACHING OUR MILITARY PERSONNEL ALL KINDS OF SUBJECTS HE IS OBVIOUSLY FULL OF KNOWLEDGE AND GIVES THE TRUTH STRAIGHT FORWARD TYPE OF GUY...SO BEFORE YOU VOTE PLEASE DO YOUR RESEARCH THE TRUTH IS THERE IN BLACK AND WHITE JUST NEED TO THINK FOR YOURSELVES AND NOT JUST TAKE THE WORDS OF A MAN JUST BECAUSE HE IS PRESIDENT. TRUMP USED THE CONMANS MOTTO "I LOVE STUPID PEOPLE AND THEY LOVE ME". WELL WE ALL KNOW HE HATES ANYONE WHO IS AGAINST HIM SO WHO ARE THE STUPID PEOPLE HE IS REFERRING TO. WELL NOW YOU CAN SEE THAT HE TRULY DOESN'T CARE ABOUT YOU BECAUSE AT THE END OF THE DAY YOU ARE ON THE SAME SIDE OF THE FENCE AS WE THE PEOPLE SO DONT DIRECT YOUR ANGER AT US TRYING TO MAKE A REAL CHANGE FOR GOOD FOR EVERYONE INCLUDING YOURSELVES YOU ARE FIGHTING AGAINST US WHILE WE ARE FIGHTING FOR A BETTER LIFE FOR ALL OF US AND ALL OF YOU. SO DIRECT THAT ANGER TOWARDS THE MAN THAT CONNED US OUT OF OUR VOTES AND THEN HAD LITERALLY KILLED A LOT OF PEOPLE AND HAS LEFT A LOT MORE LOSING THIER LIVLIHOOD. HE HAS DESTROYED US AND WANTS US FIGHTING EACHOTHER BECAUSE THE MORE NUMBERS WE HAVE THE BETTER WE ARE AND THAT SCARES THE HELL OUT OF THE GOVERNMENT AND WE THE PEOPLE WILL BE HEARD VOTE BLUE ALL THE WAY PRESIDENT THEOUGH THE SENATE AND ANY OTHER REPUBLICAN REPRESENTATIVE WHO KISSED DONALD'S A$$ VOTE THEM ALL OUT. THIER IDEOLOGY IS TO SUCK THE MONEY OUT OF THE WORKING CLASS AND POOR WHILE THEY ENRICH THEMSELVES....

  • @sallieanngillen5874
    @sallieanngillen5874 3 года назад

    I love your show! I’ve looked forward to seeing your new monologues every week. I will miss you!

  • @megan1785
    @megan1785 3 года назад +1

    stephen's reaction to the watch pointing was gold

  • @richardbraakman7469
    @richardbraakman7469 3 года назад +66

    He "profoundly" accepted the nomination because his staff couldn't get him to say the word "humbly"

    • @buddhababy2005
      @buddhababy2005 3 года назад +1

      Oh, thanks, was that the word on the teleprompter...No, he has no humility whatsoever!

    • @lindataylor3834
      @lindataylor3834 3 года назад +2

      @@buddhababy2005 I wonder if the word on the teleprompter was "proudly", which he either misread or purposely changed thinking he was replacing it with a stronger adverb that would depict greater emphasis. But just like many of his statements, it just sounded profoundly stupid.

    • @Gun4Freedom
      @Gun4Freedom 3 года назад

      This is an entirely plausible hypothesis. If I were a gambling sort, I would take odds on this.

    • @lilsammich8252
      @lilsammich8252 3 года назад

      At least his aides talked him out of "awesomely accepting"

    • @Gun4Freedom
      @Gun4Freedom 3 года назад

      @@lilsammich8252 Awesomely accepting the nomination could actually make a positive, complete thought, as in: I have some indescribable awe for the responsibility of this post. Profoundly accepting the nomination brings to mind that he may have profound plans regarding his Moscow handler's goals.

  • @Renpaichii
    @Renpaichii 3 года назад +55

    "They didn't have money, they didn't have fame." What? Almost all of the founding fathers were wealthy land owners. There's literally a provision in the constitution that protects their revolutionary war bonds.

    • @michellepowell9300
      @michellepowell9300 3 года назад +2

      This country was founded by rich white men for rich white men

    • @LincolnDWard
      @LincolnDWard 3 года назад

      I think he must've just watched _Hamilton_ and now thinks that Hamilton was the only founding father.

  • @GJ-ux8dj
    @GJ-ux8dj 3 года назад

    Stephen Colbert you crack me up!!!!!! The beginning using the Avengers was simply perfect.

  • @paul2466
    @paul2466 3 года назад +1

    Amazing! Excellent, that intro is priceless!

  • @SeanModernAthlete
    @SeanModernAthlete 3 года назад +136

    For a guy who likes to refer to his opponents as "sleepy" and "low-energy," Trump's speeches are all too often sleep-inducing. Not that I want to listen to his nonsensical rambling, anyway. Can't wait until he is voted out of office. Four years of him has been four years too many.

    • @livelaughloathe
      @livelaughloathe 3 года назад +4

      He always sounds sluggish

    • @tsicy6731
      @tsicy6731 3 года назад +5

      Another one who slipped in via the electoral college

    • @karlosiouk
      @karlosiouk 3 года назад

      Dementia Joe ftw. USA will be rekt like the dems cities currently are. Good luck lolz, Putin, Xi and Kim will have Biden for breakfast hahaha

    • @SeanModernAthlete
      @SeanModernAthlete 3 года назад +1

      @dmo572 Look, if that thought appeals to you, go right ahead and believe it, but my gut feeling is that more people disagree with you than agree. Personally, I think the Electoral College system in its current guise is the main reason Trump got elected, and I have my doubts he will be able to pull it off a second time. But really now, you think Don Jr is presidential material? Dude, you're really not setting the bar very high...

    • @SeanModernAthlete
      @SeanModernAthlete 3 года назад +1

      @LAWRENCE Only problem is that the "TRUMP TRAIN" is hurtling out of control down a steep mountainside, with no brakes, and the train driver is more concerned about his hair, tan and golf score than the safety of his passengers...

  • @IAmSuzyQ
    @IAmSuzyQ 3 года назад +186

    If you missed Trump's speech tonight, here's a summary...
    "Me, me, me, me, me. I, I, I, I, I. Deny, deny, deny, deny, deny. Cry, cry, cry, cry, cry. Lie, lie, lie, lie, lie. Gah Blesh Da Unidesh Schaces!"

    • @davidshulimson9491
      @davidshulimson9491 3 года назад +25

      I profoundly thank you for the summary so I don't have to watch the speech. (Full disclosure: I profoundly never had any intention to watch the speech.)

    • @heavierthanlight7173
      @heavierthanlight7173 3 года назад +12

      Didn't watch it and now I'm even better informed than if I did!

    • @annieparker3107
      @annieparker3107 3 года назад +5

      And blah,blah,blah

    • @janetives7718
      @janetives7718 3 года назад +3

      @@heavierthanlight7173 I had it on mute. I try lip reading. Not really.

    • @heavierthanlight7173
      @heavierthanlight7173 3 года назад +3

      @@janetives7718 did you try to focus for 70 minutes on an area on the face of trump... 🤢

  • @ekdaufin1485
    @ekdaufin1485 3 года назад

    Hysterical writing. Thank you.

  • @alicebryan8307
    @alicebryan8307 3 года назад

    I love you,Stephen Colbert!

  • @blisguy
    @blisguy 3 года назад +120

    He couldn't read "proudly" and instead said "profoundly" Even he doesn't pay attention to his speech

    • @op3129
      @op3129 3 года назад +6

      majority of my brain suspects he sharpied that edit beforehand bc he thinks its "stronger"
      (but you could be right bc "parents fighting for their children's furniture" actually happened)

    • @jimreily7538
      @jimreily7538 3 года назад +2

      Yeah, his Amphetamines have stopped working.

    • @oldrrocr
      @oldrrocr 3 года назад +2

      truth that he doesn't read his speeches beforehand, that he cannot read without glasses(he doesn't have any) and that he doesn't even know what the word "profoundly" means. Penn/Wharton must be sooooo profoundly proud.

  • @suzanneadamson1306
    @suzanneadamson1306 3 года назад +24

    He gets this sing-song inflection when he's straining to sound sincere. He knows he's a mind-gamer.

  • @LizzyMcD
    @LizzyMcD 3 года назад +7

    “Profoundly” ... Really!!!

  • @roguebuddha
    @roguebuddha 3 года назад +4

    More like "stool in their spines, grits in their souls and a massive KFC heartburn.

  • @mickreaddin4979
    @mickreaddin4979 3 года назад +55

    Trump..."I have broken America. Now I need 4 more years to completely destroy it."

  • @ridgesail
    @ridgesail 3 года назад +121

    Colbert full derisive sarcasm..."Oh no, we can't cut into the Governor!!!"
    Christie's face in the final "coming up next" moment 🤣🤣🤣🤣

    • @michellepowell9300
      @michellepowell9300 3 года назад +7

      Something tells me that Christies hands are dirty from trumps casino ventures in new jersey

    • @couchpotato6270
      @couchpotato6270 3 года назад +1

      He always looks like that.

    • @cw5001
      @cw5001 3 года назад +1

      Christie was busy kissing the Orange Cheetolini butt. lol

  • @bettywing52
    @bettywing52 3 года назад

    One of your best shows in this format. thank you for making me laugh in a good way 💙

  • @billrussell3955
    @billrussell3955 3 года назад

    Omg you made me LMFAO! THANK YOU!

  • @timypp2894
    @timypp2894 3 года назад +29

    Have your ever wonder why people supported and looked up to Hitler in the 30s?
    You don't have to look to hard..