Funny that you see everything as practice, Alex. I do this with painting since not to long, every painting that I make is just practice I tell myself. And that helps me relax about the end result. Because even if I make something I don't like afterwards it still can be part of a learning proces and further development and improvement.
@@alexanderlyon Thinking about how it works in your situation as well as my situation, maybe I should think of almost anything in life as just practice.
Sorry to hear that you have had such a rough time of it. I think it might help you is to get outside of yourself when you have to speak. When an actor plays a convincing villain or hero it's not because they are a villainous or heroic person in real life, but because they have created in their mind the personality they need for the part. Then when they go on stage they put aside their actual personality and become the character. Create a version of yourself that is brave and confident and let her give the speech. She is not shy, damaged or insecure -- she is exactly what you think you need to be to give a good speech. This takes practice but you can do it. You may want to practice in front of a mirror so you can work on the body language of confident you as well. Once you learn how to "be in character" you'll be amazed at what you can do!
I say let the anxiety happen. Emotion only last 90 seconds he said is true. I'm scared to death talk in front of people. When I finally had to do it I was shaking. After I sat in the chair after a minute it left. I made it through the speech even though it wasn't that interesting that time, I still did it. I'm very insecure and unconfident in front of others cause my past traumas with rejections so it's really hard. That's all part of me and the journey to get through it. no shame.
"It's all about the mindset." This interview is fire! Thanks for the insights, Alex and Kit! Love seeing two of the best coaches that I know, in one interview.
I would say that much of our fear is not even necessarily based in mindset, that it goes deeper. I think it is an instinctual response that to some degree we have no control over from the standpoint of the fear and anxiety response in our brains. I do think we can overcome the anxiety and not let it dominate but to rid it completely is impossible. I presented to about 100 people the other day and I literally had to tell myself to calm down even though I had no reason to be anxious. I was well prepared and confident in the topic I was presenting but the anxiety was very strong. My mind was not fearful but my body was out of control with cortisol. I think our bodies play a role too
Yes, it's all an inside job and all about our perception of the experience. I was anxious about speaking for decades in spite of being a performer until discovered a way to get rid of my anxiety for good. Having an attitude of practice is also so helpful. It gives us permission to experiment and be in the process. I'm delighted to be one of the presenters at the summit and bring my framework of healing the root causes that are described in my book, Delight In The Limelight.
Mine has always been "starting" to talk because I work myself up so much beforehand. Once I got over that start or in other areas of life I can come across as confident. Always struggled with it though, the thought of feeling/looking daft and its like im doing it to myself.
Why even try to encompasses the "Why" I'm lame at public speaking, and how do I overcome these overwhelming emotions.. Simple answer.. If you suck at speaking, have a shot or two of liquor.. people become confident and open up.. If you can talk to friends or family, you can talk to a crowd, I'd suggest listening to Conor Neil, for building confidence called, " Improve your speaking" Ever heard of him Alex?
See Kit's Fearless Public Speaking Summit (affiliate): www.bostonspeaks.com/a/2147516731/hGVphzzJ
Funny that you see everything as practice, Alex. I do this with painting since not to long, every painting that I make is just practice I tell myself. And that helps me relax about the end result. Because even if I make something I don't like afterwards it still can be part of a learning proces and further development and improvement.
Thanks for sharing, Siward. It really is a relaxing mindset.
@@alexanderlyon Thinking about how it works in your situation as well as my situation, maybe I should think of almost anything in life as just practice.
@@siwardwoudstra1751 I also think the same...
@@KumarResearch I think seeing things as practice is allowing yourself to make mistakes, because trial and error is part of practice.
It’s interesting but I do the same when I am painting 😃 and it’s help me to continue even final result is far from being perfect
So easily said than done! When you are severely shy, damaged, and insecure, you honestly, truly believe you are abandoned!
Sorry to hear that you have had such a rough time of it. I think it might help you is to get outside of yourself when you have to speak. When an actor plays a convincing villain or hero it's not because they are a villainous or heroic person in real life, but because they have created in their mind the personality they need for the part. Then when they go on stage they put aside their actual personality and become the character. Create a version of yourself that is brave and confident and let her give the speech. She is not shy, damaged or insecure -- she is exactly what you think you need to be to give a good speech. This takes practice but you can do it. You may want to practice in front of a mirror so you can work on the body language of confident you as well. Once you learn how to "be in character" you'll be amazed at what you can do!
I say let the anxiety happen. Emotion only last 90 seconds he said is true. I'm scared to death talk in front of people. When I finally had to do it I was shaking. After I sat in the chair after a minute it left. I made it through the speech even though it wasn't that interesting that time, I still did it. I'm very insecure and unconfident in front of others cause my past traumas with rejections so it's really hard. That's all part of me and the journey to get through it. no shame.
Thank you for sharing your story!
"It's all about the mindset." This interview is fire! Thanks for the insights, Alex and Kit! Love seeing two of the best coaches that I know, in one interview.
Hi, Hazel!
Hey Alex ~ Thank you for having me on!
Always a pleasure, Kit. Thanks for giving some great advice.
Thank you so much
I would say that much of our fear is not even necessarily based in mindset, that it goes deeper. I think it is an instinctual response that to some degree we have no control over from the standpoint of the fear and anxiety response in our brains. I do think we can overcome the anxiety and not let it dominate but to rid it completely is impossible.
I presented to about 100 people the other day and I literally had to tell myself to calm down even though I had no reason to be anxious. I was well prepared and confident in the topic I was presenting but the anxiety was very strong. My mind was not fearful but my body was out of control with cortisol.
I think our bodies play a role too
Alex, I love your tip, "It's just practice!" I will remember this.
I'm glad it was helpful, Linda. I say that to myself about almost everything I'm doing!
Excellent and helpful.
Yes, it's all an inside job and all about our perception of the experience. I was anxious about speaking for decades in spite of being a performer until discovered a way to get rid of my anxiety for good. Having an attitude of practice is also so helpful. It gives us permission to experiment and be in the process. I'm delighted to be one of the presenters at the summit and bring my framework of healing the root causes that are described in my book, Delight In The Limelight.
Hi, Linda. Thank you for sharing.
Hey Linda!
absolutely
Mine has always been "starting" to talk because I work myself up so much beforehand. Once I got over that start or in other areas of life I can come across as confident. Always struggled with it though, the thought of feeling/looking daft and its like im doing it to myself.
Thanks!.
Thank you so much coach.. Helps a lot
Thank you!
How do you then resolve the causes, is the ultimate trick.
Thanks!
Whoa! Thank you so much, Arturo Chacin. I sincerely appreciate it!
Thank you. Great words but a little hard to listen to with the vocalization.
Spreading good stuff here! I would also say that finding a group like Toastmasters is essential for improving confidence.
Yes, Toastmasters has helped tons of people over the years.
Hey Alex, good to see you
Hi, Troy.
I love this. Thank you for sharing these insights.
Thanks for watching!
I have been here since 50k subs! You are my inspiration
Hi, Kendi! It's awesome that you've been following for so long. Thank you!
CONGRATULATIONS
Great Interview Alex & Kit! Extremely helpful!
Glad it was helpful!
Welcome ❤️👍
Why even try to encompasses the "Why" I'm lame at public speaking, and how do I overcome these overwhelming emotions.. Simple answer.. If you suck at speaking, have a shot or two of liquor.. people become confident and open up.. If you can talk to friends or family, you can talk to a crowd, I'd suggest listening to Conor Neil, for building confidence called, " Improve your speaking" Ever heard of him Alex?
Yes, I know Conor. He's excellent.
I know this channel from Liza's video
Lisa is wonderful.
Off-topic: Zuckerberg on Rogan, please!
Disappointing. Did not fulfil the promised brief.