One of Yakub’s first creations was actually the smoke alarm, however, due to the ebonoid tribe’s refusal to replace the batteries, Yakub invented a new race that would.
we dont fall for the same tricks as they do which is probably one of the reasons we were able to overthrow our overlords and hit them with that uno reverse card
I mean, the whole thing reads just as much as a White Supremacists' fever dream. How previously blacks use to rule the world, and yet white man came from caves and were able to overthrow these hyper intelligent and advanced blacks with little more then spears. And were so good at this erasure we hid it for thousands of years and took over the world. It's down right inspirational.
Keep laughing but Ben Franklin believed it and he wrote a book on it. Napoleon believed it. He passed it to Hitler and Hitler immediately believed it and tried it himself. You guys gotta quit laughing. Kemet egypt was a college city of PHD doctors. Lasted 100k years literally. Surgery and medicine began there. All animals and insects named there. I'm KEMET. Chemistry invented there too. Chemistry translated means the black art.
@@NYUArchaeologyUh no. None of that happened. Ben Franklin didn't write a book about it or believe that. Mustache man didn't either. There was no city in Egypt that existed for 100,000 years. Surgery and medicine did not begin there. All animals and insects were not named there. The word "chemistry" comes from the Greek word khēmeia, which means "cast together" or "pour together." In no language does it mean "black art."
If you’re ever feeling sad, remember that you are a weapon of war devised by the finest scientific mind to ever exist, and that your ancestors destroyed the greatest civilisation to ever exist with nothing but their bare hands.
I remember the first time I heard of Yakub. I was on Twitter and the black nationalists were doing their usual thing. I ended up asking "if every one of these groups were originally black, where the fuck do they think white people even came from?" Some guy just responded "oh you're going to love this."
Religions in ancient times: The sun and moon were wed and led an age of wonder 1930s religions: A guy with a big forehead farmed for the pastiest genes
I’m wondering if the founder was killed and fed to swamp alligators just for being an insufferably bad writer who made the corniest “Buck Rodgers” radio specials seem like Shakespeare by comparison. He seriously did disappear at some point in Louisiana in 1930.
I cant tell if the divorce is a real thing or just a joke. I thought he was married and happy by the way he speaks about his family on the second chanel.
This all sounds like blurred sonic lore. “The black man was the fastest creature on earth until dr egg man stole the chaos emeralds from the Timbuktu library.”
I like how Afrocentric teachings are basically how Black people created the world we all enjoy, we're still awful to each other even when they ruled the world in unity, created white people to be the inferior race, and serve them, had their empire destroyed and white-washed, were enslaved for less time by the whites and complain about how they're the victims and are still just as awful to each other. This is the same stuff Malcolm X got assassinated for walking away from and affluent musicians like Jay-Z and Beyonce believe. Praise be to Father-Brother Yakub for creating me.
@@mikepoor6397 Haha, look at other Afrocentric readings and Afrocentric theories and you'll see all kinds of stuff about whites being an inferior race to serve blacks. These kinds of things are taught to liberal arts students in colleges.
There are vids on yt about ex NOI members who became Sunni Muslims and their interactions with their former correligionists. Not exactly that violent or extreme tho tbh
I feel like it’s not often discussed how deeply racist Middle Easterners are towards Blacks/Africans. Even if said Africans happen to be fellow Muslims, they’re often looked at as inferiors to Arabs, Persians, etc. Muslims love to speak about “unity” and “love for our brothers and sisters” but when you get right down to it they’re often deeply hateful people.
The founder of NOI has a white mom and a Pakistani dad and was a door to door salesman. He was taught by Drew Ali who founded the Moorish Science Temple of America. Whole thing is nuts
I knew he was half white, but I was under the impression his father was a black man. Are you telling me this “Kang” wasn’t even part African?… or is this a example of the little talked about “Islamic Slave Trade?” Because funny enough Pakistan and India do have a “native” Black population to this day because of it.
@@BigBroTejano I’m not sure actually, based on what research I’ve done it just says he was born in New Zealand and his dad was from east India which became Pakistan, and his mom was British. Didn’t make a specific ethnic distinction. He told his followers he was born in Mecca lol
I’ve been black my whole life.. I’ve heard every version of this crazy story growing up and I can tell you straight up… it is the most hilarious and inexplicably obscure story we have.
FYI, by "several counts of child molestation" he means 197 counts. Yes, nearly 200 counts and it was the largest amount of charges for such a crime ever brought to a single person in US history.
There’s something so immensely funny about creating a fictional character, asking “how do we demonstrate he’s smart? Oh just make his head 3 times bigger then everyone else so he has a big brain.” It’s something you’d expect out of a child or a comic book writer
I've been to Patmos. You can feel Yakub's (peace be upon him) presence everywhere, as if he never left us. My wife's black boyfriend was extremely distraught, so much so that he asked to be broken himself by me. My wife, seeing this, broke up with him and let me re-arrange her guts. Yakub (peace be upon him) saved my marriage.
@@matthewrawlings1284 are you implying the time travelling, possibly a cyborg, genocidal crusader, who is also maybe the incarnation of a god, doesn't make perfect sense
It's important to note that the cultivation of the White Germ has seperated the Caucazoid subrace from the afterlife. However, Yakub had foreseen this with his second arse brain (like Godzilla) and constructed an Infinity Circuit, interlaced under the Earth's crust between every EU house of Parliament, Whole Foods and the Bass Pro Shops pyramid to store their malicious, unmelinated energies until Ragnarok, where Yakub will ascend from his platinum throne in Agartha and lead every Milk-Skinned Daemon in a final war against the BIPOC federation for the right to destroy the Qu. My expired Benadryl pills told me so.
@RN4L367 dont you even fucking say that as a joke. Edit: this whole thing was a joke. y'all took the bait hook, line and sinker lol. take it as a lesson. a lesson in waht you might ask? idk, why dont you go google it lol.
How the mighty have fallen... It's sad. Follow the science, it is the only way to decalcify your pineal eye now that you know the lie. Or you can read and believe all the 1940's - 50's science "fiction" you can find, it will do the same thing. Farmer in the Sky (Robert Heinlein) really happened, or is about to... both! Read it and believe!
😂😂This is one of the funniest vids and funniest comments sections I've seen in a long time.Thank you one and all 🙏 And thank Yakub ( peace be upon him )
I would argue with the Black Muslims I was locked up with about Yakub for hours. When I asked them about their beliefs. They eventually got to Yakub. I honestly thought they were joking with me about old Yakub at first. But, it was even funnier when I realized they were serious.
@@Keirnoth I mean if God appeared before you, you might freak out but you wouldn't hit him, it's unfathomable. It's much the same for a black seeing a standard Yakubian male in the wild. It's like seeing God.
Lemee get this straight. Allah, just, completely out of boredom created an entirely new race of celestial beings and told them "Go ahead and relax. I made this for you" only for one of them to go "If this is paradise then how come im not the one with the ability to do what you can do." Are you fucking serious. Even in the story of "Adam and Eve" there was curiosity in why the Apple was so important to god. This implies they had paradise and they thru it all away all because its instinctive even on a cosmic celestial level that a civilization even of the highest pinnacle of existence will never be allowed to exist forever because everything within the realm of creation just needs something to hate regardless of its reason You'd think Allah thought "Why are they angry with me I gave them everything." Thats so stupid. Imagine being as close to the creator of everything as possible and youre STILL unhappy and you cant explain why.
@@KnightofFunnyJunkimagine getting endless government handouts and freebies and never being held socially responsible for any hardships you bring upon yourself and STILL feeling like you need more? Shit hasn't changed in millions of years I see.
@noone12748 my Karlach actually became this with the Spear you get from the Genie if you make him angry, while making her into a Mindflayer 🤣 achievements said only 4 % of people did that at the time
As a Finn and a historian I can attest to this mans knowledge of the ancient Imperial history of Finland and the massive decline in our race ever since the Hyperwar. I proclaim Count Dankula a honorary Finn. You now have improved resistance against hangovers from cheap vodka.
Malcolm X left the nation of islam and converted to actual islam after visiting mecca, he even changed his name to Al-Hajj (meaning the one who has completed the pilgrimage) Malik Al-Shabbaz. Then the nation of islam killed him when he came back and started speaking against them and elijah mohammed. But yes, he did believe in this for a hefty portion of his life.
Doesn't matter if he converted to real Islam. He believed it. Believing this nonsense for even a second is far too long for anybody with half a braincell. Besides. Actual Islam is barely better. Barely. At least NoI haven't killed millions, conquered and forcefully converted half the known world, be cause that's actual Islam is spread, through force. All of the things atheists accuse Christians of doing, Muslims have actually done. NoI can be hateful morons all they like, as far as I know they have caused not even a fraction of the damage that real Islam has. Point being, doesn't matter. Only fools believe in Nation of Islam, and only violent fools believe real Islam.
I remember joining a seminar at my university I randomly signed into, since I was late for the semester as always and just needed some points in a subject outside my field. I was stoned as fuck for the first meeting and this guy stood there with a 90min Yakub presentation, completly straight faced. It was great, lmao.
Bro went to University to pay for the most experience sifi story ever sold. Lol I can just imagine going to college and being like well I'm cooked I ain't learning shit from here.
@@Sin_Alder How do you know if someone is a social-conservative? Don't worry, it's their entire personality since they have literally no other vice except the high they feel from getting really angry & unhinged
As a black man (Nigerian, not from America), this video is so hilarious! I can't believe there are people who actually made this up and call it a "religion". Racialists are crazy, no matter where in the world😂😂 We have our own crazies here too. the comment section is gonna be sooooo fun to read😂😂😂😂😂
lol it’s crazy! I used to sell cars and we had a believer of this stuff that wanted a very specific car we had, when he heard there were no black salesman he left at first,but ended up coming back. My boss stuck me with him since I was rookie and other salesman didn’t want to work with a racist.. he ended up getting along really good with me and had to say that I looked like I had African ancestry(I’m Norwegian and Irish descended 😂😂) in order to make himself not feel guilty for having a good time hanging out and buying a car from me.. I almost felt bad to be honest, must be exhausting to carry so much hate.
"You know how whites came to be? They were black once. But after being captured by Yakub they were changed and twisted into a perfect monsters" -saruman the white
Yakub formed me specificially in his image, I know its true because anytime I am threatened with my life, I simply laugh and remind myself that I am white, and my assailants back down in pure terror. Thank you Lord Yakub.
The writings of the "Honorable Prophet Elijah Muhammad" are comedy gold. L Ron Hubbard was once quoted as saying "Dude that's what you believe in? Who in their right mind would think any of that happened?"
There are people who actually believe this at face value as a religion, they don't even hide it away for high level members like Scientology with their space emperor. Let that sink in.
Fun fact I created the smoke detector to see if I succeeded and to know when I finally created the ultimate weapon. The fact it can also detect fire and smoke and therefore is a saftey device is completely an accident.
Afrocentrism and black supremacy in general are both massive copes. The majority of their adherents don’t really believe any of this stuff, they just desperately want to. I would even extend this concept to black activism.
And all of it because they feel impotent and inferior because they never had a glorious struggle to gain their freedom. They resent being so weak that freedom was given to them by their former oppressors and that makes them very angry and bitter hence all the cope.
I brought up the alliance between the Nation of Islam and the American Nazi Party to my history teacher who said the same thing and I literally saw this man short circuit in real time
@@DANCERcow Not really an official alliance, but George Lincoln Rockwell did perform a speech to a crowd of Nation of Islam members talking about how American Race Relations were being deliberately manipulated by a peculiar sort of people.
@@spingebill8551 the AI for youtube is very, very hit and miss. It's like the police in real life. You'll see one person pulled over and then 100 people breaking the law right next to you
My genetic ancestry test says I'm 7% black. That allows me to say the gamer word 100% of the time. And trust me, I do. My ancestors didn't go through all that for me to just not say it.
This could be one of the coolest Sci-Fi games ever, dubious ancient history mixed with dubious religion, aliens and space, this could easily be a GOTY.
So Yt people are just Yakub's Terminators? Sick. This is so much cooler than being a Viking. I feel like Yakub was just autistic and really hated how everyone was always late so often that he created an entire race of people who are specifically good at being on time.
@@DeadlinePhil any self-respecting child of The Mighty Headed Allpapa Yakub (praise be upon him) holds nothing but merriment in their hearts for the divine harmonics of the Yodel that He has bestowed upon us lowly, grateful subjects.
Father Dankula needs to apply for his channel to be considered a church and therefor taxfree. His sermon has given more wisdom and spiritual advice than anything else I've seen.
Go to TryFum.com/DANKULA or scan the QR code and use code DANKULA to get your free FÜM Topper when you order your Journey Pack today!
Stealing the first comment 7 hours ago?!
RUclipsr privilege, smh.
HI DAD
What’s up, my fellow Yakubian Apes?
Sorry Dank...I don't smoke da reefer 😅❤❤
Bro, just skip past it - he's wearing a different shirt in the ad so it's really easy. @@Kuwaitisnot_adeployment
One of Yakub’s first creations was actually the smoke alarm, however, due to the ebonoid tribe’s refusal to replace the batteries, Yakub invented a new race that would.
I'll be honest trailer park whites don't often either.
That's some Sam Hyde knowledge bruvvah.
@@severiusbrandusa1413 it's become a tiktok meme basically at this point. ShortFatOtaku did a decent video explaining it
Beep
Thats where the word „people“ comes from. It originally described white „peeple“ that could hear the godly frequencies of the peep.
I love how this shit is used to dehumanise europeans yet white people saw that and went "this shit funny af lmao" and started yakub posting
It was more like “SO TRUE” and we embraced our heritage as white devils.
@@ringomandingo1015so true my fellow test tube amigo
Embrace our heritage of bio-Chads
we dont fall for the same tricks as they do which is probably one of the reasons we were able to overthrow our overlords and hit them with that uno reverse card
I mean, the whole thing reads just as much as a White Supremacists' fever dream. How previously blacks use to rule the world, and yet white man came from caves and were able to overthrow these hyper intelligent and advanced blacks with little more then spears. And were so good at this erasure we hid it for thousands of years and took over the world. It's down right inspirational.
My grandmother used to tell me: "no matter what they teach you in school, Yakub was Korean"
goddamn right.
North Korean
You know what? My Tribe believing in Bigfoot just seems more normal every day.
Cue Cpt. America meme: I understood that reference.
DAS RITE
"White people love hot tubs because it reminds us of Yakub's Bubbling Tanks"
True. Hot tubs always remind me of the good old days ❤️
Keep laughing but Ben Franklin believed it and he wrote a book on it. Napoleon believed it. He passed it to Hitler and Hitler immediately believed it and tried it himself. You guys gotta quit laughing. Kemet egypt was a college city of PHD doctors. Lasted 100k years literally. Surgery and medicine began there. All animals and insects named there. I'm KEMET. Chemistry invented there too. Chemistry translated means the black art.
@@NYUArchaeologyUh no. None of that happened. Ben Franklin didn't write a book about it or believe that. Mustache man didn't either. There was no city in Egypt that existed for 100,000 years. Surgery and medicine did not begin there. All animals and insects were not named there. The word "chemistry" comes from the Greek word khēmeia, which means "cast together" or "pour together." In no language does it mean "black art."
@mr.brenman2132 ok sure. Look it up buddy. Your grandfather herodotus said so 3000 years ago he's the eyewitness.hahhaha. Grandpa is a liar in 2024??
@mr.brenman2132 let me know when you say grandpa is a liar.
If you’re ever feeling sad, remember that you are a weapon of war devised by the finest scientific mind to ever exist, and that your ancestors destroyed the greatest civilisation to ever exist with nothing but their bare hands.
DAS RITE!
Mhmmm, chile
The Blessed Blood of a thousand generations charges through mighty veins.
💪💪💪💪💪💪💪💪💪💪
I guess things aren’t so bad after all!! Thanks my brother.
This requires a South Park-style “this is what some people actually believe” banner across the bottom of the page
I'm surprised South Park hasn't done an episode on this.
Amen to that! Haha
This is what Out of Africa theory believers believe
@@antonioreconquistadorno lol
@mrlank I was thinking about that aswell 😂
The most terrifying fact in the world is that there's people who take this 100% seriously.
nice seeing u here
Eyyyyy wassup Loli
I love your stuff, man.
Ongo bongo people
Yo loli
"Emporeror Palestine shoots lightening at Mace Dindu"
I fucking lost it at the first part but once "Dindu" processed in my head, I fucking cackled.
The writer had a field day with this.
😂 Same
Is Emperor Palestine Palpatine's brother?
Dindu is perfect
@@TyKay-vd9fohis son, one who spawned Rey
I remember the first time I heard of Yakub. I was on Twitter and the black nationalists were doing their usual thing. I ended up asking "if every one of these groups were originally black, where the fuck do they think white people even came from?"
Some guy just responded "oh you're going to love this."
It's one of those things where the first time you hear it, you think it must be a prank. But then you google it and you're just like "oh no" lol.
It's like Chris-chan lore.
@@DonVigaDeFierroit’s a good thing never found out about the Nation of Islam
I'm convinced Malcolm X left the nation when he heard of yakub. @@leviticusprime4904
I had to stop reading Malcolm X’s biography for years because the story was too wild to get through.
Dankula, when he finds out he is 0.0001% black
Thanks to the one drop rule, that makes Dank 100% black.
funny af, made my day.
If Elizabeth Warren can still attend the local tribe meetings then dankula can use the N word...or just report on these crazy ass beliefs
Still not as white as Elizabeth Warren!
One drop rule according to whites means he's 110% Black
‘All religions are equal’
The religion:
Equally bullshit
Aye
Only equal in that @@Sheadogisbeast01
Woah, there, edgy atheists. Careful, or you might summon your great prophet, Richard Dawkins. He does not like to be called in vain.
"My religion is hating religion!"
Isnt the NoI basically a cult rather than a full fleged religion?
"we're reaching levels of shitposting that shouldn't be possible" -Black Science Man
Religions in ancient times: The sun and moon were wed and led an age of wonder
1930s religions: A guy with a big forehead farmed for the pastiest genes
I’m wondering if the founder was killed and fed to swamp alligators just for being an insufferably bad writer who made the corniest “Buck Rodgers” radio specials seem like Shakespeare by comparison. He seriously did disappear at some point in Louisiana in 1930.
Honestly...sounds like some southern shenanigans right there@eldermillennial8330
Makes Mormonism seem like a Tolkien level novel by comparison.
Oh, by the way, the guy who founded this religion was a white guy.
@@eldermillennial8330No gator did that. .
First he shaves his beard, then he becomes a pan-african studies professor. The divorce really hit him hard 😔
Mid-life crisis.
Happens....en sheiiitttt!!!!
I cant tell if the divorce is a real thing or just a joke. I thought he was married and happy by the way he speaks about his family on the second chanel.
@@jami.j2044 p sure it's a joke dude, same as papameat. Feel like one might be copying the other lol
@@benb5308nope unfortunately his wife is actually divorcing him.
This all sounds like blurred sonic lore. “The black man was the fastest creature on earth until dr egg man stole the chaos emeralds from the Timbuktu library.”
Sonic lore is a metaphor for the melanin "people".
you stole that from nick mullen
Did you get that from Cumtown?
@@DolphinPain I’m gay
The chaos blood diamonds
Yakub. The Father who left to get milk and actually did.
Thank you Yakub for making me A. Exist and B. Racist. My life wouldnt be as much fun without it
Many such cases
Peace be upon him
You’re my favorite child
@@YakubTheFatherHe is among us! Blessed be.
@@dan5609police be apon him😂
As a Slav, I am proud of our contribution to the Finno-Korean Hyperwar
i too, love being a bioweapon
Oh, is that what they're calling Space War One now?
@Avengrll What do you mean _"One?!"_ 😨
@@Daniel_Lancelin don't tell me you don't know about the one that happened on the 6th of Septurber 2031?
@@b0bther4md0m Whoops, I was off partying with big booty aliens in Alpha Centauri around that time. Guess I dodged a bullet. 😅
Yakub created a species that knows how they would feel if they didn’t eat breakfast this morning
You would have many more likes if more people knew how they would feel if they understood this comment.
But I did eat breakfast.
@@xneo329 But what if.... you didn't?!!
@noddy1973 What are you talking about? I said I ate breakfast today.
Hungry
I like how Afrocentric teachings are basically how Black people created the world we all enjoy, we're still awful to each other even when they ruled the world in unity, created white people to be the inferior race, and serve them, had their empire destroyed and white-washed, were enslaved for less time by the whites and complain about how they're the victims and are still just as awful to each other. This is the same stuff Malcolm X got assassinated for walking away from and affluent musicians like Jay-Z and Beyonce believe. Praise be to Father-Brother Yakub for creating me.
They weren’t created to be inferior but rather to cause division, which has been proven successful
@@mikepoor6397 Haha, look at other Afrocentric readings and Afrocentric theories and you'll see all kinds of stuff about whites being an inferior race to serve blacks. These kinds of things are taught to liberal arts students in colleges.
@@mikepoor6397 Through sheer technical and mercantile superiority, I'm pretty sure the Kingdom of Benin set the prices, you know.
Kinda just shows how easily manipulated humans can become. I mean all races have some goofy as shit
@@raaby7236 Malcolm X was assassinated for thrice-denying almighty Yakub.
As a former Nation of Islam member theres a reason Im former, they dont tell you this shit off the bat, its like Scientology lowkey
Praise to Christ
APOSTATE!
Sounds like the freemasons
and here you are spewing heresy
Either way, you’re an idiot for ever being taken in at all. Glad you’ve grown though!
13% of the tribes destroyed 50% of the moon.
More like 62%
@@literallyshaking8019 exactly %49.75. they wiped out the minority.
Stats like that make me chimp out thanks Yakub
ask death grips who was on the moon
6.5%; the other half were women.
Yakub is one of the missing 40k Primarchs
No, he just changed names to Vulkan
Yakub > Emperor
@@delta9915No. Yakub made the Emperor.
YES!
This whole shit heavily reminded me of the emperor 😂😂
YES I YAKUB AM VERY PROUD OF YOU SPREADING AWARENESS ABOUT YOUR CREATOR!
I am your biggest fan OMGG
Head tricknologist reporting for duty
I LUV MY DADDY YAKUB!!!!
F*CK YES, you are the best maker ever!
I genuinely want to see the interaction of a Nation of Islam "scholar" interacting with an Iranian Islamic Fundamentalist.
Who will kill who first? Another great mystery of the universe
There are vids on yt about ex NOI members who became Sunni Muslims and their interactions with their former correligionists. Not exactly that violent or extreme tho tbh
I feel like it’s not often discussed how deeply racist Middle Easterners are towards Blacks/Africans. Even if said Africans happen to be fellow Muslims, they’re often looked at as inferiors to Arabs, Persians, etc. Muslims love to speak about “unity” and “love for our brothers and sisters” but when you get right down to it they’re often deeply hateful people.
@@kara-k3854 Sure, but most Iranians are Shi'a, not Sunni.
They did great work on The Secret Relationship Between Blacks And Jews
The tricknology is strong with this one
Das rite my yakubian brother Dantavius, huge fan of the channel keep it up 👍🏻
DAS RITE!
Yoooo, it's another RUclips creator. Never thought I'd see you here 🙃
Ayy, it's mah boi Dantavius. How goes the conflict with the ex wife?
trigganometry
Shoutout to our father Yakub.
Todd is it true that you were the first creation of allfather Yakub?
🙏🏻
👋
lorkhan is basically yakub from the mer-ish PoV
*OUR* father 😂😂
The founder of NOI has a white mom and a Pakistani dad and was a door to door salesman. He was taught by Drew Ali who founded the Moorish Science Temple of America. Whole thing is nuts
The original Shaun king
Where does Dr. Umar (Umoist) Johnson fit into this?
I knew he was half white, but I was under the impression his father was a black man. Are you telling me this “Kang” wasn’t even part African?… or is this a example of the little talked about “Islamic Slave Trade?”
Because funny enough Pakistan and India do have a “native” Black population to this day because of it.
@@BigBroTejano I’m not sure actually, based on what research I’ve done it just says he was born in New Zealand and his dad was from east India which became Pakistan, and his mom was British. Didn’t make a specific ethnic distinction. He told his followers he was born in Mecca lol
Showing that the NOI is bunk.
I’ve been black my whole life.. I’ve heard every version of this crazy story growing up and I can tell you straight up… it is the most hilarious and inexplicably obscure story we have.
Its like black people's scientilogy 😂
I wish you many more hilarious and inexplicably obscure stories.
I'm sorry for your misfirtune
I hung out with Blacks as an Asian. They believe I am a God. I am not down for this crazy Dark Skinned shit.
"my whole life" well... yes ofcourse.
Lol
Lmao
HYPERBOREA CALLS MY CRACKAS
🤚🏻
🙋🏼♂️
✋🏻
I see fields of spinning friendship windmills before my third eye...
🙏🏻
"He did this for 200 years, afterwards dying at the young age of 150 year old" 🤔We need the asians here.
Dont worry 😂 he got around to making them after he died because he miscalculated
Decolonize maff, dawg!
he had that benjamin button disease lol
Immortal Mythic Asians never reveal their real age.
@@allewis4008das wassup
"yodeling at certain frequencies causes extreme discomfort to black people" I believe it.
Time to reclaim our natural armaments and perform Lord Yakub's will.
All praise Yakub for gifting us country music, blue jeans, swimming and lactose tolerance
Dont forget He Also invented the Father
fun fact, black people actually have a much higher rate of lactose tolerance than white people do
yakub's trickery knows no bounds
And showing up to work, too. And remaining faithful to their wife after getting her pregnant.
And earning a sustainable income independent of government hand outs.
This is like that one Sam Hyde skit
X chromosome is from Xenu.
Y chromosome is from Yakub.
Das rite
Xenos ÷ yakub = white man
Scientology… tricknology! Makes sense!! 😂
🤯🤯
One for each brain.
Oh. Emm. Gee.
You have broken the 🧬 code and brought us wisdom my wyteBlix brother. Praise be upon you.
FYI, by "several counts of child molestation" he means 197 counts. Yes, nearly 200 counts and it was the largest amount of charges for such a crime ever brought to a single person in US history.
Wait til you get caught
Well, he was following in Mohammad's footsteps.
@@StrangeCreedthat old nut. Mary was 12 😂
Police be upon him@@StrangeCreed
@@IYouLikeCheeseII'm using this from now on.
Next time you change the battery in a smoke detector, my brothers, spare a thought for Yakub, who made it all possible.
The Ceiling Bird is not amused!
BEEP!
I believed for a while that he was discussing some obscure Warhammer 40K lore.
Yes!
I think this was intended😂he even used concept art of an eldar craftworld
Close enough
To be fair this would fit right in with 40ks already insane lore.
@@FatherAndrew-Scarlet-Priestyakub could be a primarch
When Yakub’s people couldn’t pay their bills on time, he had to create a race of people that would.
Needed a maintenance guy to change the battery in the ceiling bird..
Oh how I wish YT would allow us to bookmark comments 😂🏆
What race is that?... 💀😂
Yakubs anger was kindled after his 10th bike was stolen!
@@AquaFan1998the human race
There’s something so immensely funny about creating a fictional character, asking “how do we demonstrate he’s smart? Oh just make his head 3 times bigger then everyone else so he has a big brain.” It’s something you’d expect out of a child or a comic book writer
.......😏
Jimmy Neutron is yakubian propaganda confirmed
Well, yeah. This whole story was made up by a Snake Oiler from Louisiana in order to scam freemen.
The intellect of many... ehm... "coloureds" is indeed similar to that of a child, if not inferior
L. Ron Hubble tier shit
I took a shot for every “peace be upon him”. I can now turn water into whiskey.
More like whiskey into piss
I've been to Patmos. You can feel Yakub's (peace be upon him) presence everywhere, as if he never left us. My wife's black boyfriend was extremely distraught, so much so that he asked to be broken himself by me. My wife, seeing this, broke up with him and let me re-arrange her guts. Yakub (peace be upon him) saved my marriage.
I'm actually going on pilgrimage to Patmos next week. Can't wait!
Yakub (peace be upon him) be with you brother
He doesn't deserve a master like you. I hope he knows that.
Something tells me ur wife’s black bf was diddy and he just there watching in a tub filled with baby oil to hide his toys
@@Sonny-m1f It's okay he'll spend the rest of his life trying to make it up to him and that'll have to be enough.
😂😂😂😂
About half an hour in this video is like listening to a lore video about a franchise you've never heard of which is entirely written by crackheads
So...like niche elderscrolls lore.
@@matthewrawlings1284 are you implying the time travelling, possibly a cyborg, genocidal crusader, who is also maybe the incarnation of a god, doesn't make perfect sense
@@johnjohnson9073 I was more referring to how screwy the metaphysics are, but that qualifies too.
"Like"... Yes, exactly "like".
😂 it's like if someone wrote a 40k style lore page...completely jacked up on heroine, after getting beaten with a brick
It's important to note that the cultivation of the White Germ has seperated the Caucazoid subrace from the afterlife. However, Yakub had foreseen this with his second arse brain (like Godzilla) and constructed an Infinity Circuit, interlaced under the Earth's crust between every EU house of Parliament, Whole Foods and the Bass Pro Shops pyramid to store their malicious, unmelinated energies until Ragnarok, where Yakub will ascend from his platinum throne in Agartha and lead every Milk-Skinned Daemon in a final war against the BIPOC federation for the right to destroy the Qu.
My expired Benadryl pills told me so.
Wait, Benadryl? Did this whole thing start because some urbanite tried to make lean with the wrong cough syrup?
Good ole Benadryl Shapiro
Sizz Syrup.@@aliveandwellinisrael2507
You know what, that's some solid backstory, let go with it
All tomorrows reference expired benadryl is based
This video converted me, I'm going to have a blast explaining this to my parents
My dear children,
You're welcome for creating you all. I love you. Go forth and procreate.
Best,
Yakub
Praise be upon you
Thank you lord, peace be upon you
@@yakubtricknologist WIT ARMS WIDE OPON
Thanks, Yakub!
Father, we miss you! Come home soon. XOXO
so what I'm hearing is: white men have A father & they work to make him proud
Always have been
I ❤️ YAKUB
i WISH i had a father i could make proud. but sadly, mine mollested me.
@RN4L367 dont you even fucking say that as a joke.
Edit: this whole thing was a joke. y'all took the bait hook, line and sinker lol. take it as a lesson. a lesson in waht you might ask? idk, why dont you go google it lol.
@@zerrierslizer1you must not know the audience of this channel dear wigga.
Per capita is our most powerful tricknological weapon.
And parking tickets
And job applications
And social welfare 😊
And fatherlessness
And smoke detectors
This is Warhammer 40K sent through a remedial ghetto prism.
Well, I wasn't expecting Dankula to pivot to a science based channel but here we are.
He's working on his Phd for tricknology
How the mighty have fallen... It's sad.
Follow the science, it is the only way to decalcify your pineal eye now that you know the lie.
Or you can read and believe all the 1940's - 50's science "fiction" you can find, it will do the same thing.
Farmer in the Sky (Robert Heinlein) really happened, or is about to... both! Read it and believe!
So it went from "We wuz Kangs" to "We wuz God and shieeet"
I get channel strikes for making comments like this😂
They claim its ""hate speech"" and shieeet
as it does
Wakanda forever
@@AndToTheRepublic4WhichItStands SHIEEEEEET MAAAAYN
No different then we wuz VIKANGS
Watching this video has fried away approximately 30% of my brain cells. It seems that Yakub's powerful lore was too much for my small albinoid mind
Are you sure it was only 30%? 13% of this video fried 50% of my brain, after all
At a certain point I stopped trying to follow along and just enjoyed it as word salad.
Deep fried* pass the gravy, son.
@@zzzzzzzzzz_meit's always the 13% of brainrot that commits 50% of the catastrophic aneurysms isn't it
😂😂This is one of the funniest vids and funniest comments sections I've seen in a long time.Thank you one and all 🙏 And thank Yakub ( peace be upon him )
Disney Movie Producers: "Write that down. WRITE THAT DOWN!"
If only… I would pay so much to see this movie!
They wish their original projects these days were anywhere near this good
If anyone did it, it'd be Disney. Honestly, id be kinda hyped.
@@jonathanwells223They probably tried to shove some of this into Black Panther.
Directed by Spike Lee
I would argue with the Black Muslims I was locked up with about Yakub for hours. When I asked them about their beliefs. They eventually got to Yakub. I honestly thought they were joking with me about old Yakub at first. But, it was even funnier when I realized they were serious.
They are “Muslims” the same way Mormons are Christian’s lol
So how did it end?
How did you hold your laughter in?
@@genericascanbe3728I'm just surprised they didn't freak out and hit him for mocking how silly it was.
@@Keirnoth I mean if God appeared before you, you might freak out but you wouldn't hit him, it's unfathomable. It's much the same for a black seeing a standard Yakubian male in the wild. It's like seeing God.
Yakub: "i have plans, i have plans that i cannot share with you right now becuz the haters will sabotage me"
Lemee get this straight.
Allah, just, completely out of boredom created an entirely new race of celestial beings and told them "Go ahead and relax. I made this for you" only for one of them to go "If this is paradise then how come im not the one with the ability to do what you can do."
Are you fucking serious. Even in the story of "Adam and Eve" there was curiosity in why the Apple was so important to god. This implies they had paradise and they thru it all away all because its instinctive even on a cosmic celestial level that a civilization even of the highest pinnacle of existence will never be allowed to exist forever because everything within the realm of creation just needs something to hate regardless of its reason
You'd think Allah thought "Why are they angry with me I gave them everything."
Thats so stupid. Imagine being as close to the creator of everything as possible and youre STILL unhappy and you cant explain why.
@@KnightofFunnyJunk
Honestly that just sounds like human nature. Angry at nothing
@@KnightofFunnyJunkimagine getting endless government handouts and freebies and never being held socially responsible for any hardships you bring upon yourself and STILL feeling like you need more? Shit hasn't changed in millions of years I see.
I’ve always had this uncontrollable urge to perform ceremonial head binding, during the evenings. Now, finally it all is making sense.
FINALLY, BLACK MEGAMIND
The Disney remake
The Netflix adaptation
Negamind
@@MacacoCorDeMerda-r2t you spelled it wrong but i appreciate the effort my n*!#~?
A ginger megamind. Wait.
29:49 “Their psionic abilities allowed them to chuck spears further than any other tribe”
After playing Baldurs Gate 3 this hits so good
@@eno6712 Nat 20 good?
@@eno6712 Playing spear chucking psi warrior
@@noone12748why chuck a spear when a chest with over 400 pounds of rocks is better.
@noone12748 my Karlach actually became this with the Spear you get from the Genie if you make him angry, while making her into a Mindflayer 🤣 achievements said only 4 % of people did that at the time
As a Finn and a historian I can attest to this mans knowledge of the ancient Imperial history of Finland and the massive decline in our race ever since the Hyperwar. I proclaim Count Dankula a honorary Finn. You now have improved resistance against hangovers from cheap vodka.
I declared him an honorary slav a while back, too.
Finland isn’t real. Nice try swarth.
@@LobsterDeity It's not my fault you cannot peer into the world between statistics and statistic error in which we exist. Seethe more.
Perkele!!! Can I be an honorary finn too?
Seems accurate.
Malcom X believed this. Remember this next time you hear about how smart he was.
Nope, he left nation of Islam when this bullshit started. He became a Muslim afterward
Malcolm X left the nation of islam and converted to actual islam after visiting mecca, he even changed his name to Al-Hajj (meaning the one who has completed the pilgrimage) Malik Al-Shabbaz. Then the nation of islam killed him when he came back and started speaking against them and elijah mohammed. But yes, he did believe in this for a hefty portion of his life.
Shows how smart you are for literally not knowing that he converted back to actual Islam
Doesn't matter if he converted to real Islam. He believed it. Believing this nonsense for even a second is far too long for anybody with half a braincell.
Besides. Actual Islam is barely better. Barely. At least NoI haven't killed millions, conquered and forcefully converted half the known world, be cause that's actual Islam is spread, through force. All of the things atheists accuse Christians of doing, Muslims have actually done.
NoI can be hateful morons all they like, as far as I know they have caused not even a fraction of the damage that real Islam has.
Point being, doesn't matter. Only fools believe in Nation of Islam, and only violent fools believe real Islam.
@@Mshari-the-grey-wardenI mean honestly that wasn't much better. But at least it got him to stop being so racist against white people.
WE WUZ CRACKAZ N SHEET!
DAS RIIIIITE
Just after M
Scheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet
ayo hol up
Ain't gonna rape themselves yo
I remember joining a seminar at my university I randomly signed into, since I was late for the semester as always and just needed some points in a subject outside my field. I was stoned as fuck for the first meeting and this guy stood there with a 90min Yakub presentation, completly straight faced. It was great, lmao.
Bro went to University to pay for the most experience sifi story ever sold. Lol I can just imagine going to college and being like well I'm cooked I ain't learning shit from here.
How do you find out if someone's singular personality trait is being a drug addict?
You don't have to, they'll tell you.
@@Sin_Alder Nah I don't smoke regulary, even back then. It just made the whole experience alot more surreal.
Just can't get better stoner entertainment than that
@@Sin_Alder How do you know if someone is a social-conservative? Don't worry, it's their entire personality since they have literally no other vice except the high they feel from getting really angry & unhinged
This is black scientology
Na scientology is white this.
Nah black racist scientology ist not mormonism
True taste of American Culture right here. They wont show this in hollywood.
@@Trump2024aswyeah thats actually a way smarter way of putting it.
Fun fact: Nation of Islam actually uses L Ron Hubbard's Dianetics now.
Finally! A definitive guide from the foremost authority on the subject! Peace be upon you, my brother!
When someone tells me that Wakanda isn't real, I will proudly direct them to this video as truthful evidence of the contrary.
As a black man (Nigerian, not from America), this video is so hilarious! I can't believe there are people who actually made this up and call it a "religion". Racialists are crazy, no matter where in the world😂😂 We have our own crazies here too. the comment section is gonna be sooooo fun to read😂😂😂😂😂
Like the Japanese, Nigerians are honorary whites
lol it’s crazy! I used to sell cars and we had a believer of this stuff that wanted a very specific car we had, when he heard there were no black salesman he left at first,but ended up coming back. My boss stuck me with him since I was rookie and other salesman didn’t want to work with a racist.. he ended up getting along really good with me and had to say that I looked like I had African ancestry(I’m Norwegian and Irish descended 😂😂) in order to make himself not feel guilty for having a good time hanging out and buying a car from me.. I almost felt bad to be honest, must be exhausting to carry so much hate.
Is “racialist” a new phrase now?
@@TheSutaniannope. Just another way of saying an ethnonationalist/supremacist.
In other words, actual nutters.
@@TheSutanian Idk but I've heard Ali G say it
"You know how whites came to be? They were black once. But after being captured by Yakub they were changed and twisted into a perfect monsters"
-saruman the white
"My fighting White Man, whom do you serve?"
"Yakub"
If that was true you would be able to run in the sun 😂
@@alimohammed4709 We can get a tan. Can you magically create vitamin D? Nope.
@@alimohammed4709poor John Henry.smh
@@alimohammed4709there was giants in them days 🤫
I thank you Father Yakub for Your generous gift of lactose tolerance, which is very precious to me
This lore sounds like it was written by a black nerd in like 1995
thats because it was
It was. A black racist nerd
*1965
Some one gonna tell him👀
It was a white nerd who grifted them.
Yakub invented the milk jug in 300,000 BC and immediately put kool-aid in it.
💀💀🤣🤣
Grape to be exact.
You can never get the taste of milk out, how do people mix kool aid in that?!?
which he also invented.
Black people don't do that lololol You have to use a pitcher to add and stir the sugar
This man really rewrote silmarillion into yakub origin story
Yakub formed me specificially in his image, I know its true because anytime I am threatened with my life, I simply laugh and remind myself that I am white, and my assailants back down in pure terror. Thank you Lord Yakub.
Is this a Boondocks reference?
@@1whospeaks Praise be to Yakub for breeding the suseptibility to nibba moments out of us
The writings of the "Honorable Prophet Elijah Muhammad" are comedy gold. L Ron Hubbard was once quoted as saying "Dude that's what you believe in? Who in their right mind would think any of that happened?"
L Ron Hubbard was a black man, his real name was L Ron Hoyabembe.
@@HOXiFiREL Ron Harambe
@@HOXiFiRE Turn that poop into wine
The guy who created the scientology cult criticizes another cult leader. The pot calling the kettle black.
@@KroiAlbanoiArbanon Or calling the kettle ni........
There are people who actually believe this at face value as a religion, they don't even hide it away for high level members like Scientology with their space emperor. Let that sink in.
“People”😂
Of course they believe it's true
@@MacacoCorDeMerda-r2tit's funny because the NoI says the same thing about white ppl
Absolutely based.
@@highbread817 yet only one of us is factually correct 👀
Why does this story sound like Dune, sometimes Lovecraft and at other times basic UFO/UAP conspiracy? This is so fun! 😆
Thank you, Father Yakuub, for the divine knowledge of knowing when a smoke detector needs new batteries 🙏🏻
Fun fact I created the smoke detector to see if I succeeded and to know when I finally created the ultimate weapon. The fact it can also detect fire and smoke and therefore is a saftey device is completely an accident.
The amount of Afro-centric/ṣupremacist cope in Yakub's lore is unreal.
It's derived from the Nation of Islam, a black supremacist group. Definitely checks out!
just say it properly ffs, black supremacists, or if you want some fun, blackzi's.
Afrocentrism and black supremacy in general are both massive copes. The majority of their adherents don’t really believe any of this stuff, they just desperately want to. I would even extend this concept to black activism.
That’s the point
And all of it because they feel impotent and inferior because they never had a glorious struggle to gain their freedom. They resent being so weak that freedom was given to them by their former oppressors and that makes them very angry and bitter hence all the cope.
I'd like to thank my wife, my parents and the Great All Father Yakub for blessing us with Count Chocola in our feeds.
In high school for a project on Malcom Xs auto biography me and my buddies made a 6 foot tall yakub statue.
Remembering my history teacher discussing what a brilliant thinker Malcolm X was has become alot funnier.
I brought up the alliance between the Nation of Islam and the American Nazi Party to my history teacher who said the same thing and I literally saw this man short circuit in real time
lol proof he was dumb
At least Malcolm eventually came to see the nonsense and walked away from it, and he was killed by Nation of Islam members for doing so.
What alliance, now I'm curious!
@@DANCERcow Not really an official alliance, but George Lincoln Rockwell did perform a speech to a crowd of Nation of Islam members talking about how American Race Relations were being deliberately manipulated by a peculiar sort of people.
If nobody got me, I know Yakub got me. Can I get a "DAS RITE" ?
DAS RITE!!!!!!! Edit: SSHHHHEEEEETTTTTTTT
DAS RITE!!!!
DAS RITE!! MMHM!!
DAS RITE HOMEBOY
You can get deez nuts HAHA GOTEEEM
"Asalam aleikum, my curious caucasoid kin." Is one Hell of an into.
32:50 thank goodness. I was worried this was starting to become slightly unrealistic. Glad to see the story stay in reality
I am Yakub's most unmelanated warrior
I am Yakubs Right Hand
Head tricknologist reporting for duty
My nigga Dank out here coming out for the people ✊🏿✊🏿✊🏿
Genuinely curious, how is your comment visible? I once got a strike because of a private meme playlist I had on my channel had the word “şħïť”.
@@spingebill8551 dude, I got hit for calling someone a “cr.zy bia+ch” after she used the N word on me, that’s how I found out 😂
@@spingebill8551He black.
@@spingebill8551 the AI for youtube is very, very hit and miss. It's like the police in real life. You'll see one person pulled over and then 100 people breaking the law right next to you
@@SiriusSphynx I know, but also that playlist was like 8 years old too lmao. I think ever since then the AI gave me less lenience too.
Getting called caucazoid by a scotsman with a strange beanie on their head is a jumpscare alright
Historical fact: Yakub invented the chirping smoke alarm.
*BEEP!*
My genetic ancestry test says I'm 7% black. That allows me to say the gamer word 100% of the time. And trust me, I do. My ancestors didn't go through all that for me to just not say it.
✊️
Hell yeah nigga
Damn, I'm only 1-3% so I can only say it 50% of the time, still waiting on reparations and my membership card to come in the mail.
I'm 0.1%, and I say it in every sentence my ni...🥷🏿👀
I have freckles, making me about 3% black. It's our cultural tradition to say the holy word when crossing a bridge.
I just can't get over the fact that this was an actual belief that someone held. Like that's some African Science Fiction right there.
Holds.
Was? 😂 my sweet summer child
Oh, don't worry. It goes downhill from there.
*hold. It’s an active religion, show some respec.
@@chrisw6164-t*
you better not badmouth my boy yakub master of magnets
He's a magician?
@@TheJcris87 hes a magnetian
He’s not a musician
@@creeperking0017 how does that work?
nahh ,.. my money is on Magneto
This could be one of the coolest Sci-Fi games ever, dubious ancient history mixed with dubious religion, aliens and space, this could easily be a GOTY.
This is unironically really cool mythology.
Tricknologists rise up.
this is the franchise you tell your Dune and WH40K not to worry about except 10 inches taller and better endowed 😂
I'd play in this guys scifi rpg game at least once. "Roll for Tricknology."
You should listen to Alex Collier - huge Earth back story, cool sci-fi, totally believes it all. Even though 100% of his predictions failed.
WE
WUZ
K A N G Z
And shit
Das rite!
DAS RAAAAIT!
We Wuz Astronubians
N SHIET
So Yt people are just Yakub's Terminators? Sick. This is so much cooler than being a Viking. I feel like Yakub was just autistic and really hated how everyone was always late so often that he created an entire race of people who are specifically good at being on time.
This comment sent me 🤣🤣
@@Ceboolwhere?
"he did this for 200 years"
"died at 140"
ummmmmmmmmmmmmmm
36:52 "Yodeling at the right frequency causes extreme distress to black people".
This gives Mars Attacks a whole new perspective.
To be fair yodeling at the right frequency causes everyone distress
@@DeadlinePhil any self-respecting child of The Mighty Headed Allpapa Yakub (praise be upon him) holds nothing but merriment in their hearts for the divine harmonics of the Yodel that He has bestowed upon us lowly, grateful subjects.
Speaking 3 syllable words has a similar effect
Well, I'd like to thank Count Dankula for telling me who my actually daddy is.
Actually Daddy ™️
Still waiting for him to make it back from getting a pack of cigarettes at the corner shop.
You can call me daddy all you want, uhhh doiishhhhh. Sorry. Shit joke. I'll stop.
Yakub Maxing Lfg.
I'll be ur yakubian daddy
Father Dankula needs to apply for his channel to be considered a church and therefor taxfree. His sermon has given more wisdom and spiritual advice than anything else I've seen.
This is my favourite SCP article.