As a kid with autism parents get a lot of shit from other adults for keeping the calm demeanor when a neurodivergent kid has a melt down so and they can explain it all they but unless an adult see it first hand there not going to get
@@nickolashybrid3121 I understand where you are coming from but it is really messed up to post someone else's meltdown without their consent which especially applies to children. Also a parent should focus on helping their child with a meltdown not pulling out the camera to file a tiktok.
Question: if the tiktok hadn't said "neurodivergent" to me that would have looked like a regular temper tantrum. I have ASD and I've had such tantrums, and so has my brother and all my cousins all of whom are neurotypical. We all grew out of it. And when I saw the tiktok to me that seemed like the same kind of tantrum we used to have, a typical stage in child development where we learn to accept rules and that we can't just impose our will on others, no matter how much we scream. What makes that child's tantrum neurodivergent? Or another way around, if I see a child have a tantrum, how can I tell if it's a regular tantrum or something in connection to neurodivergence?
@@augustaseptemberova5664 A meltdown isnt a tantrum, think of it as similar to a panic attack because both are caused by high forms of stress(in meltdowns, is tipically because we cant understand or properly process whats goingon around us) and because they both have flight or fight responses. The difference is that panic attacks have flight responses, where the first instinct is to hide and get away, while meltdowns have fight responses, which is why we are so aggresive during one. A tantrum is basically a form of protest, its saying "I want something and if you dont give it to me i will make you regret it". A meltdown, on the other hand, is a survival instinct response caused when we dont understand why something is or isnt happening.
@@dudeeee2015 Thank you so much for taking the time to explain :) I think I understand now. Personally, my own meltdowns are definitely not of the 'fight'-kind, which is why I thought it was like this for all people with autism. But now I know better. When I don't understand what's happening, I don't become aggressive. I just 'shut down' and stare blankly and stop reacting to people/input until the confusion passes, sometimes I cry, sometimes that only takes minutes, sometimes an hour, and very rarely until I go to sleep. I only get meltdowns during sensory overload and then my reaction is a flight reaction, as in "I have to get out of here, NOW" and I run away to find a quiet, dark place to hide and calm down. But I know for sure that's not a panic attack, because I've had a panic attack twice in my life - and panic attacks are different and much worse than just the impulse to run and hide. I only become aggressive when someone touches me unexpectedly, especially if it's close to my head, and especially especially if it's my hair or ears. And then I don't scream, but instinctively push or hit. That happens regardless of whether I'm in a meltdown or not.
I understand that the third one is meant to help, but I know that I would be furious at my parents if they showed a video of me like that. We can’t really control it, and it’s something personal.
I liked most of these videos but sharing a child in their most vulnerable state (meltdown) without their consent isn't OK. You maybe didn't know but please don't do it again if you care about neurodivergent children. I'm not trying to be rude btw
The one with the beautiful bald girl talking, ive had that exact situation with a guy friend of mine thats diagnosed ADHD. He thought he was a narcissist, but i grew up with a sociopath step father and can recognize narcissism really easily, and when i do cross paths with them, we clash... hard. But i also explained to my friend that i didnt think he was narcissistic and why i thought so. Also, we get along great, so thats another sign that i dont think hes a narcissist lol.
IMO, the third video is not a meltdown, it’s a tantrum. It’s not caused by physical overstimulation or emotional confusion, it’s an emotional reaction to things not going the way she wants. All kids do this. If anything, the video doesn’t belong because from what I can tell it has nothing to do with being neurodivergent (unless there is more information about the child on the mother’s account).
I can see both sides. She is very upset about her sibling not wanting to sleep in her room regardless of whether she’s NT or ND, that will be absolutely embarrassing when she’s older. She’s being vulnerable about not understanding her siblings actions, and it seems like she is emotionally confused as to why they don’t want to. I try to think about how that specific child will feel as a teen or even older realizing their parent put that out for the world to see. But I can also see your point too. None of us can tell whether it is a meltdown or a kid being a kid.
@@d.h.4778 I agree that it probably shouldn’t be in here regardless. In general, I think parents shouldn’t post videos of their children online. There is no way for the child to have informed consent, whether or not they are autistic or nt. The video should be removed for that reason as well.
@@alexandrahand5649 I’m right there with you. Kids online isn’t regulated. None of us have any idea what goes on behind the camera or how many takes their parents make them do or videos they force them to be in.
The getting words and phrases stuck in your head is a big one for me. I'll be wandering around and my brain just goes 'kiss me' And just... Who? I don't want to be kissed! But my brain is like These are our words. We will say them often.
6:02 this tiktok hit home because I too struggle with perspective taking until someone describes it in extreme detail or “dumbs it down” for me. Otherwise, I have a tendency to put other people in MY shoes and misunderstand their perspective or situation because it is being filtered through what I know and experience to try and understand, which usually goes wrong.
2:55 my autistic son from across the room "🤩🥰 what is that?" My adhd butt "🤢 oh please don't get stuck on this sound I can feel it in my ears and tongue."
the most impressive thing I saw today was the child in the first video not only knowing the word of his 4th language but knowing the right german articles! thats insane
I really do enjoy these compilations! Thanks for putting them together. Is there any way to get them in portrait mode? If not, that’s chill, I was just wondering
2:15 has me arguing with myself as I struggle not to live in a victim mentality or state. But I've tried my damnedest to live like a neuro-plain bagel in this burnt out bakery of life so hard i genuinely forgot about my neuro-spicy diagnosis entirely, I freaking gaslighted myself because of the crappery we call our society. However; in the last two or three years I'm stopping all that noise of pretending and denying for the sake of neuro-plain status, or being able to be called "normal" if you prefer. Now I'm seeking treatment for my ADHD and comorbidity diagnosises going to therapy and trying to live mostly healthier bits at a time. But the core of this remains. Going from experiencing simultaneously berating, name calling and insults alongside belittling assumptions further tacked on alongside claims of some degree of gifted status; only to find its bus of projections of jealousies, insecurity, poor anger management and upbringing overall, and that claim of gifted status will ever only serve in a nye microbial aspect of overall life and will actually serve me no true good REALLY... It's crushing to say the least. The number of negative statements are a single speck in a proverbial pool of BS we neuro-spicy people are literally forced to deal with in what feels like an utterly incompetent bakery of civilizations... Nobody ever told me that life would be fair, but countless people tell me I should be happy. Conveniently leaving out the how of it of course. We'll at least in therapy it teaches you (or me at least) to reorient your focus wherever is positive but not to ignore problems, only the negative thinking. 😅 Hard fought and learned is that gratitude is paramount in this, and life is (like it or not) a great gift for us all. We are numerous and vibrant one and all, and at all times!?! Emerge that, but also emerge balance means we cannot know the light without the dark as the contrast gives the understanding. Be strong but be you. You are loved by your fellow neuro-spicy people guaranteed. If you made it this far, for real, name your favorite special interest in a reply please
4:00 this helps me so much understanding myself i have the same thing but never really nothised whats going on (im not diagnosed with anything) but still this helps me so much thank you
Neuro typical people can’t hear electricity I don’t know this that’s why everyone looks at me funny when I said I hear it I personally like the sound of air conditioning the best
@@whitetiger2515 thank you for your respond but the internet is full with humans who called "autistic" so i do not think that there are humans in the world, without autistic suddenly every human is autistic🤷 suddenly every human has a "desease"
I agree with the second to last one, but the wording seems kind of off bc there are people with narcissistic personality disorder who aren't manipulative or selfish. I might just be misinterpreting it, but it seemed a little negative to them, though I know op had good intentions. It felt like they were describing it more as a bad trait and that's not cool considering how stigmatized cluster b disorders are. It kinda rubbed me the wrong way.
I think you may be mixing up narcissistic personality and narcissistic personality disorder. Narcisstic personality is if someone has predominant narcissitic traits, but without them being maladaptive or exploitative of others. Narcissistic personality disorder is when a person with narcisstic personality is exploitative, maladapted and their behaviors are anti-social, i.e. lie significantly outside of what is socially acceptable. A disorder is a disorder, not a trait. You want to treat and optimally cure/resolve the disorder, but that doesn't mean that the personality trait is 'bad'. When a person with the disorder goes to therapy it's not be cured of their personality or trait, but to learn how to be narcissistic without harming themselves and others.
@@augustaseptemberova5664 thanks, I agree 100%. I've just seen people use "narcissistic = bad" in a lot of cases and it kind of felt like the last one was unintentionally doing that. I don't have npd and I probably need to do more research on it, I just want to help destigmatize it anyway I can (even if it's insignificant in the grand scheme of things 🤷♂️)
Question: Does the words "Neurotypical" and "Neurodivergent" annoy anyone than just me? I hate it. You're different, special, odd, whatever. You are what you are, you have what you have, you're not the normal everyone else is. I'm Autistic, not neurodivergent, I'm not normal. My mum is normal, she's not neurotypical. It annoys me so much sorry for the accidental hostility. Does anyone else feel this way?
I understand what you mean. But we are disabled for the way the world is set up. There is nothing wrong with us. There is no such thing as normal. The world the way it is running right now makes us disabled so neurodivergent or neurotypical is just a way to describe the differences. It’s like explaining yourself as a cis black man or trans white woman. It’s not to discriminate. It’s not to separate us. It’s so others understand our minds work differently than ours, and kind of more easily explain how, rather than go into detail. But I also understand where you are coming from. If this world was also set up in a way for us to thrive I don’t think it would be as triggering for you. It’s also very hard that (at least for me thirty y.o.) I spent my entire life being called names and things and now it can seem like neurotypicals are trying to use our own words as a way to put us down and bully us instead of the names I was called as a child. So I can 100% understand why it makes you uncomfortable. However YOU would like to be addressed is how you deserve to be addressed, anyone who continues to label you as something you do not like is a dickhead and you deserve better, whether that’s friends, teachers, even if you tell your mental health provider that it bothers you and they don’t listen. You deserve respect, and if you personally feel it’s disrespectful to you to be called ND, as long as you explain that’s not how everyone feels but you would prefer not to be labeled that way you are allowed to do that, and also allowed to be angry if someone in your life is not respecting that. I think it is good to be able to have this open dialogue and hear how others feel about our community in a calm way too. So it is wonderful to hear your feelings as well and hear a different perspective.
I'm confused as to why it annoys you? Neuro refers to the brain, so someone with autism or adhd doesn't have an average brain, they have one that diverges from the average, aka neurodivergent. Someone without mental illnesses is considered neurotypical. Edit: maybe the word average isn't the best to use. I'm not sure of the best word but I just mean that most people don't have autism so the population of people that do are technically just different. Doesn't mean that difference is a good thing or a bad thing.
I’m not sure if you know this, but scientists have said most of the people we remember for changing the world in a positive way were probably autistic. Einstein. Emily dickenson. Jefferson. Tim burton. Nikola Tesla. It is not a bad thing at all. We are some of the smartest people alive. We have a way of being able to think in a way NT can’t. The world (the way government has made it) is fucked up, not us.
It didn't seem like she was letting her talk that way at all. She specifically stated that if she chose to keep behaving that way there would be consquences.
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meltdowns should never be included in these. I never would have forgiven my parents.
As a kid with autism parents get a lot of shit from other adults for keeping the calm demeanor when a neurodivergent kid has a melt down so and they can explain it all they but unless an adult see it first hand there not going to get
@@nickolashybrid3121 I understand where you are coming from but it is really messed up to post someone else's meltdown without their consent which especially applies to children. Also a parent should focus on helping their child with a meltdown not pulling out the camera to file a tiktok.
Question: if the tiktok hadn't said "neurodivergent" to me that would have looked like a regular temper tantrum. I have ASD and I've had such tantrums, and so has my brother and all my cousins all of whom are neurotypical. We all grew out of it. And when I saw the tiktok to me that seemed like the same kind of tantrum we used to have, a typical stage in child development where we learn to accept rules and that we can't just impose our will on others, no matter how much we scream.
What makes that child's tantrum neurodivergent? Or another way around, if I see a child have a tantrum, how can I tell if it's a regular tantrum or something in connection to neurodivergence?
@@augustaseptemberova5664 A meltdown isnt a tantrum, think of it as similar to a panic attack because both are caused by high forms of stress(in meltdowns, is tipically because we cant understand or properly process whats goingon around us) and because they both have flight or fight responses. The difference is that panic attacks have flight responses, where the first instinct is to hide and get away, while meltdowns have fight responses, which is why we are so aggresive during one. A tantrum is basically a form of protest, its saying "I want something and if you dont give it to me i will make you regret it". A meltdown, on the other hand, is a survival instinct response caused when we dont understand why something is or isnt happening.
@@dudeeee2015 Thank you so much for taking the time to explain :)
I think I understand now. Personally, my own meltdowns are definitely not of the 'fight'-kind, which is why I thought it was like this for all people with autism. But now I know better.
When I don't understand what's happening, I don't become aggressive. I just 'shut down' and stare blankly and stop reacting to people/input until the confusion passes, sometimes I cry, sometimes that only takes minutes, sometimes an hour, and very rarely until I go to sleep.
I only get meltdowns during sensory overload and then my reaction is a flight reaction, as in "I have to get out of here, NOW" and I run away to find a quiet, dark place to hide and calm down. But I know for sure that's not a panic attack, because I've had a panic attack twice in my life - and panic attacks are different and much worse than just the impulse to run and hide.
I only become aggressive when someone touches me unexpectedly, especially if it's close to my head, and especially especially if it's my hair or ears. And then I don't scream, but instinctively push or hit. That happens regardless of whether I'm in a meltdown or not.
I don't like the third one because we shouldn't be seeing some kid when they are in the midst of a meltdown.
I understand that the third one is meant to help, but I know that I would be furious at my parents if they showed a video of me like that. We can’t really control it, and it’s something personal.
I liked most of these videos but sharing a child in their most vulnerable state (meltdown) without their consent isn't OK. You maybe didn't know but please don't do it again if you care about neurodivergent children. I'm not trying to be rude btw
dude get rid of the meltdown one. that's a) never okay to post without consent and b) can be extremely triggering.
The one with the beautiful bald girl talking, ive had that exact situation with a guy friend of mine thats diagnosed ADHD. He thought he was a narcissist, but i grew up with a sociopath step father and can recognize narcissism really easily, and when i do cross paths with them, we clash... hard. But i also explained to my friend that i didnt think he was narcissistic and why i thought so. Also, we get along great, so thats another sign that i dont think hes a narcissist lol.
IMO, the third video is not a meltdown, it’s a tantrum. It’s not caused by physical overstimulation or emotional confusion, it’s an emotional reaction to things not going the way she wants. All kids do this. If anything, the video doesn’t belong because from what I can tell it has nothing to do with being neurodivergent (unless there is more information about the child on the mother’s account).
I can see both sides. She is very upset about her sibling not wanting to sleep in her room regardless of whether she’s NT or ND, that will be absolutely embarrassing when she’s older. She’s being vulnerable about not understanding her siblings actions, and it seems like she is emotionally confused as to why they don’t want to. I try to think about how that specific child will feel as a teen or even older realizing their parent put that out for the world to see. But I can also see your point too. None of us can tell whether it is a meltdown or a kid being a kid.
@@d.h.4778 I agree that it probably shouldn’t be in here regardless. In general, I think parents shouldn’t post videos of their children online. There is no way for the child to have informed consent, whether or not they are autistic or nt. The video should be removed for that reason as well.
@@alexandrahand5649 I’m right there with you. Kids online isn’t regulated. None of us have any idea what goes on behind the camera or how many takes their parents make them do or videos they force them to be in.
The getting words and phrases stuck in your head is a big one for me.
I'll be wandering around and my brain just goes 'kiss me'
And just... Who? I don't want to be kissed! But my brain is like
These are our words. We will say them often.
omg why is this me, it's the same phrase for me too!
@@caspergotlost omg yes
I had the phrase “You wh0r3.” stuck in my brain for awhile, it was very strange and I kept randomly muttering it at no one and freaking people out.
@@FloatyyBrain oh dear, that's quite unfortunate 😂
Thank you for the description of autism shutdown, I think this is what I've been going through all week.
6:02 this tiktok hit home because I too struggle with perspective taking until someone describes it in extreme detail or “dumbs it down” for me. Otherwise, I have a tendency to put other people in MY shoes and misunderstand their perspective or situation because it is being filtered through what I know and experience to try and understand, which usually goes wrong.
2:55 my autistic son from across the room "🤩🥰 what is that?" My adhd butt "🤢 oh please don't get stuck on this sound I can feel it in my ears and tongue."
the most impressive thing I saw today was the child in the first video not only knowing the word of his 4th language but knowing the right german articles! thats insane
I really do enjoy these compilations! Thanks for putting them together. Is there any way to get them in portrait mode? If not, that’s chill, I was just wondering
Yeah, that’d be nice!
Unfortunately, they are from Tiktok, and this is the format used on that site
2:15 has me arguing with myself as I struggle not to live in a victim mentality or state. But I've tried my damnedest to live like a neuro-plain bagel in this burnt out bakery of life so hard i genuinely forgot about my neuro-spicy diagnosis entirely, I freaking gaslighted myself because of the crappery we call our society. However; in the last two or three years I'm stopping all that noise of pretending and denying for the sake of neuro-plain status, or being able to be called "normal" if you prefer. Now I'm seeking treatment for my ADHD and comorbidity diagnosises going to therapy and trying to live mostly healthier bits at a time. But the core of this remains.
Going from experiencing simultaneously berating, name calling and insults alongside belittling assumptions further tacked on alongside claims of some degree of gifted status; only to find its bus of projections of jealousies, insecurity, poor anger management and upbringing overall, and that claim of gifted status will ever only serve in a nye microbial aspect of overall life and will actually serve me no true good REALLY... It's crushing to say the least. The number of negative statements are a single speck in a proverbial pool of BS we neuro-spicy people are literally forced to deal with in what feels like an utterly incompetent bakery of civilizations...
Nobody ever told me that life would be fair, but countless people tell me I should be happy. Conveniently leaving out the how of it of course. We'll at least in therapy it teaches you (or me at least) to reorient your focus wherever is positive but not to ignore problems, only the negative thinking. 😅 Hard fought and learned is that gratitude is paramount in this, and life is (like it or not) a great gift for us all. We are numerous and vibrant one and all, and at all times!?! Emerge that, but also emerge balance means we cannot know the light without the dark as the contrast gives the understanding. Be strong but be you. You are loved by your fellow neuro-spicy people guaranteed.
If you made it this far, for real, name your favorite special interest in a reply please
2:51 those sound makes my skin crawl
4:00 this helps me so much understanding myself i have the same thing but never really nothised whats going on (im not diagnosed with anything) but still this helps me so much thank you
2:52 feels like I’m melting, no explanation don’t know why
Neuro typical people can’t hear electricity I don’t know this that’s why everyone looks at me funny when I said I hear it I personally like the sound of air conditioning the best
3:03= diese Wort gibt es nicht oder irre ich mich? Was ist Allistik?
“Allistic” refers to people who are not autistic.
@@whitetiger2515 thank you for your respond
but the internet is full with humans who called "autistic"
so i do not think that there are humans in the world, without autistic
suddenly every human is autistic🤷
suddenly every human has a "desease"
Non autistic people
People who aren’t autistic
I'm ngl idk abt the third one
I agree with the second to last one, but the wording seems kind of off bc there are people with narcissistic personality disorder who aren't manipulative or selfish. I might just be misinterpreting it, but it seemed a little negative to them, though I know op had good intentions. It felt like they were describing it more as a bad trait and that's not cool considering how stigmatized cluster b disorders are. It kinda rubbed me the wrong way.
I think you may be mixing up narcissistic personality and narcissistic personality disorder. Narcisstic personality is if someone has predominant narcissitic traits, but without them being maladaptive or exploitative of others. Narcissistic personality disorder is when a person with narcisstic personality is exploitative, maladapted and their behaviors are anti-social, i.e. lie significantly outside of what is socially acceptable.
A disorder is a disorder, not a trait. You want to treat and optimally cure/resolve the disorder, but that doesn't mean that the personality trait is 'bad'. When a person with the disorder goes to therapy it's not be cured of their personality or trait, but to learn how to be narcissistic without harming themselves and others.
@@augustaseptemberova5664 thanks, I agree 100%. I've just seen people use "narcissistic = bad" in a lot of cases and it kind of felt like the last one was unintentionally doing that. I don't have npd and I probably need to do more research on it, I just want to help destigmatize it anyway I can (even if it's insignificant in the grand scheme of things 🤷♂️)
Question: Does the words "Neurotypical" and "Neurodivergent" annoy anyone than just me? I hate it. You're different, special, odd, whatever. You are what you are, you have what you have, you're not the normal everyone else is.
I'm Autistic, not neurodivergent, I'm not normal. My mum is normal, she's not neurotypical.
It annoys me so much sorry for the accidental hostility.
Does anyone else feel this way?
i like those words but i respect ur opinion :)
like its a valid point
I understand what you mean. But we are disabled for the way the world is set up. There is nothing wrong with us. There is no such thing as normal. The world the way it is running right now makes us disabled so neurodivergent or neurotypical is just a way to describe the differences. It’s like explaining yourself as a cis black man or trans white woman. It’s not to discriminate. It’s not to separate us. It’s so others understand our minds work differently than ours, and kind of more easily explain how, rather than go into detail. But I also understand where you are coming from. If this world was also set up in a way for us to thrive I don’t think it would be as triggering for you. It’s also very hard that (at least for me thirty y.o.) I spent my entire life being called names and things and now it can seem like neurotypicals are trying to use our own words as a way to put us down and bully us instead of the names I was called as a child. So I can 100% understand why it makes you uncomfortable. However YOU would like to be addressed is how you deserve to be addressed, anyone who continues to label you as something you do not like is a dickhead and you deserve better, whether that’s friends, teachers, even if you tell your mental health provider that it bothers you and they don’t listen. You deserve respect, and if you personally feel it’s disrespectful to you to be called ND, as long as you explain that’s not how everyone feels but you would prefer not to be labeled that way you are allowed to do that, and also allowed to be angry if someone in your life is not respecting that. I think it is good to be able to have this open dialogue and hear how others feel about our community in a calm way too. So it is wonderful to hear your feelings as well and hear a different perspective.
I'm confused as to why it annoys you? Neuro refers to the brain, so someone with autism or adhd doesn't have an average brain, they have one that diverges from the average, aka neurodivergent. Someone without mental illnesses is considered neurotypical.
Edit: maybe the word average isn't the best to use. I'm not sure of the best word but I just mean that most people don't have autism so the population of people that do are technically just different. Doesn't mean that difference is a good thing or a bad thing.
I’m not sure if you know this, but scientists have said most of the people we remember for changing the world in a positive way were probably autistic. Einstein. Emily dickenson. Jefferson. Tim burton. Nikola Tesla. It is not a bad thing at all. We are some of the smartest people alive. We have a way of being able to think in a way NT can’t. The world (the way government has made it) is fucked up, not us.
i am all for gentle parenting but you cannot let her talk to you that way
Yeah I agree
It didn't seem like she was letting her talk that way at all. She specifically stated that if she chose to keep behaving that way there would be consquences.
@@Kira_Martel Exactly. Kids aren't that stupid. When they know there's a consequence, they tend to stop.