Signs That The No Contact Rule Is Working On Your Ex

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  • Опубликовано: 7 ноя 2024

Комментарии • 226

  • @DarknessIsThePath
    @DarknessIsThePath 5 лет назад +359

    The longer NC, the more I wonder if I want him back at all lol

    • @chrisseitercoaching
      @chrisseitercoaching  5 лет назад +60

      That is part of the process. When the mind clears and you find an emotional balance, things start to come into better focus. Same can apply to your ex. Eventually a couple that cares for each other at a deep level, find their way back.

    • @DarknessIsThePath
      @DarknessIsThePath 5 лет назад +6

      That's true, I mean I still care and love him to a degree, but sometimes makes you wonder if he cares at all, mostly out of curiosity for each day @@chrisseitercoaching

    • @chrisseitercoaching
      @chrisseitercoaching  5 лет назад +38

      Just keep you focus on your own self growth and recovery, lifting yourself up for "you", not him. He knows what he needs t o do if he wants you back. And if he chooses not to pursue....chalk it up as his loss and your gain.

    • @calmysohento712
      @calmysohento712 5 лет назад

      Same feeling😁😁

    • @abdelli.f987
      @abdelli.f987 4 года назад

      King Ghidorah me too 🤣

  • @abcdefg208
    @abcdefg208 4 года назад +156

    I'm starting to care less and less everyday I use to be so emotional but now I see what the bigger picture is

    • @chrisseitercoaching
      @chrisseitercoaching  4 года назад +12

      Its not a bad thing to care less, it shows you are getting over the pain

    • @ramirroxd6986
      @ramirroxd6986 4 года назад +3

      I don't really care less , I still think about her alot , I'm just afraid of her response if I do make the first step

    • @thetraveldynasty7915
      @thetraveldynasty7915 Год назад

      I’m
      Having major surgery and he is watching my kids it’s been booked for months and I have no one else well I broke up with him dec 3 my surgery is in 11 days so he told me he still would help me do I went no contact 25 days and he called 2 times texted 2 times but I did t respond yest I broke no contact I sent a nice message and called he called in 2 hours and was very sweet loving
      He said Hey flower that’s my nickname and he sis is I’m doing good now that I hear your voice he said he hadn’t told any one we broke up and they are asking for me then his mom got in car he told me he told her we are fighting not broke up she said hi and said he is going through it not eating she handed him the phone and he played it off like she was exaggerating we talked 30 mins and he stated he will take me to airport and watch the kids
      Question he was very sweet and it was a great convo he complimented me said I’m
      Strong he knows I left becuase he was cheating and he was wrong so what do I do Now I very much want him back is this a good sign he’s still keeping the kids fyi there not his there mine and he offered to take me to airport and pick me up

  • @dannasamson1344
    @dannasamson1344 4 года назад +42

    On my 6th day of NC, my ex reached me out and told me my silence made him realized how much he was sure of himself about his feeling towards me. Men fall inlove, when us girls not around. Just make sure we created to our man more on good and positive energy when we are still together. On top of it all, love and respect yourself first.Thanks Chris for the great advise! Keep it up

    • @alicesampiano1925
      @alicesampiano1925 Год назад

      If its ok to post on socialmedia while you doing no contact rule? Because i am onlineseller ineed to post something to sell🥺

  • @EmilyGloeggler7984
    @EmilyGloeggler7984 2 года назад +24

    The ex I had went no contact, and despite loving him, I decided to keep walking away and focus on healing and moving on. Good thing because eleven years later, I met a new man who is now my husband!

  • @ft.janice
    @ft.janice 3 года назад +29

    girls get over and deal with their emotions first then the guy feels it, by the time he comes back im like i dont care anymore, im over it

    • @dragorn3212
      @dragorn3212 Год назад +2

      Easy to be over it when as a woman you have 50 times the number of options, and 10 times the amount of support, attention, and validation. And in addition they start lining up their replacement months before breaking up with a guy. That's why its called easy mode. You cannot compare the two for men it is like building a house that collapses out of no where.

    • @matthewcasebolt1902
      @matthewcasebolt1902 9 месяцев назад

      @@dragorn3212there are signs - we were just too naive to see them

  • @Oluafeyijimi
    @Oluafeyijimi 6 лет назад +35

    This is very true, completely true, for me anyway. My Ex and I have been separate for almost two months now and he jumped into a relationship in the first month, I felt sad and crazy but I chose to let it go and ignore things. Unconsciously I went into no contact and he has been checking my post and really following my updates. At this point I don't even want him back cause time has help me realize how childish, low self-esteemed and petty he is. It is crazy but it works.

    • @chrisseitercoaching
      @chrisseitercoaching  6 лет назад +4

      I'm glad your feeling better!!

    • @mrclever2470
      @mrclever2470 5 лет назад +1

      If he went with another person yea fuck that. He dint want to be alone . I rather wait and I want to get back with my wife .

  • @lalame2840
    @lalame2840 4 года назад +10

    No contact made me better and peace of mind too..I don't wanna have connection with him,I think move on but first I felt in hell when I'm started the no contact but day by day I'm become ok

    • @lalame2840
      @lalame2840 4 года назад

      I*

    • @chrisseitercoaching
      @chrisseitercoaching  4 года назад +2

      That is good you reached this point you feel you want to move on. No Contact is always best as it gives you a chance to understand your emotions and thoughts. What you do and do not want for yourself too.

  • @kevphillips02
    @kevphillips02 6 лет назад +11

    Surely access to your Facebook is a total contradiction to no contact .

    • @Innoz1337
      @Innoz1337 3 года назад +2

      I don't think it technically is, since 'No Contact' is about not initiating contact, its not running away and ignoring, and it's not being pushy and needy, but being neutral.
      And you're not directly contacting her on social medias, if you post something on your wall/stories..
      No Contact is not about deleting her from everything, destroying your relationship photos and jewelry and get into a ton of rebounds...
      but there are coaches that vary on their social media tactics, but most agree that in the first 3 days to a week, you should be like a dead profile on social media..
      And avoid running a jealousy-game with ambiguous pictures of you and other "potential" romantic partners of the opposite sex...

  • @chumele
    @chumele 5 лет назад +16

    NC day 13. He told me already that he misses me and he has some doubts about the breakup. And for the last two days silence...:(

    • @chrisseitercoaching
      @chrisseitercoaching  5 лет назад

      Hi there...sounds like some upside here. go visit my website and check out my teachings

  • @ummee25
    @ummee25 Год назад +1

    if he cheats on you, you don't want any sign! pls.

  • @chiaroo1058
    @chiaroo1058 5 лет назад +10

    How about an ex who claims they are "never jealous"? An ex who has a habit of waiting to be pursued rather than actively pursuing? This is a point of pride for him, I know.

    • @chrisseitercoaching
      @chrisseitercoaching  5 лет назад +7

      No such beast who is never jealous. Sound like someone a bit big for their britches! Some stuff you rolll with unless it negatively impacts the relationship. Could be an maturity issue.

    • @owyana
      @owyana 4 года назад

      chiaroo10 my issue too. I’m scared he will never reach out.

  • @mahamkhan4400
    @mahamkhan4400 3 года назад +4

    Is it a good thing if im always been a chaser and this time im not chasing for him .?? Will it disturb him somehow and make him comeback ?

  • @themoonlustgoddess9561
    @themoonlustgoddess9561 4 года назад +4

    I scored 86 percent. I think I’m going for it

  • @fiftyshadesofme
    @fiftyshadesofme 2 года назад +1

    How does this work if they are the ones dumping you and then removing all possible means of contact.

  • @leahc8347
    @leahc8347 5 лет назад +1

    I havnt heard from him still 😭. Its not working and its going to be very hard if and when I feel confidant and ready for the challenge to contact him and do it rightly and not fail. Its so hard. I thought the hardest bit was the '30 day' but I didnt first notice was that the harder part comes later..
    And Im not going to be self improved enough anytime soon. Plus half the 30 day thing has gone by and havnt gone far and I still feel I desperately want him and not sure all the areas to improve that he might be looking out for. But I just wish we had the right communication to sort this it wouldnt have come to this. And its true he was fearful of commitment.. but I still love him... we invested so much time and connection which confused me what fear of commitment really meant... plus he can be so stubborn at times...
    This relationship is still haunting me though on all those jam packed special moments... I wish there was a way to sort this and get us both understanding from the same hymn sheet... there was so much love and trust in the beggining ... but then I wonder if I was ending up doing more effort and had the right to be upset or the things he said towards the end were true and justafiable... cuz if so I feel awful - but I digress. I really could do with support through this but I cant afford it ...
    What do I have to do specifically that I know that Im not 'working on myself rightly' what do I have to do that I know mentally Ive chaned 100% for the better.
    Plus Im not on facebook, should I? plus I think he will be happy if I moved on... :/
    Plus Im really scared of doing all the initial text rightly and not messing it up...if the only for of contacting will still be open to me still... :/

    • @chrisseitercoaching
      @chrisseitercoaching  5 лет назад

      Hey Leah, so social media will help you create the appearance you are living a positive life without him. So adding mutual friends and letting them see what is going on with you through them will change his perspective and hopefully will make him reach out to you first. But not reaching out yourself is going to delay your progress so consider doing it when you know youre going to be busy straight after sending the message e.g the gym

    • @leahc8347
      @leahc8347 5 лет назад

      @@chrisseitercoaching I thought I have to wait at least 30 days not to reach out. And Im still under the shock of the breakup eventhough its been roughly a month since and 20 days of that month in no contact. I dont know his mutual friends and he is originaly from abroad settling here. I might be able to attend a social group we first met at and maybe if I go there he might get word Im looking fine... but Im still quite scared of messing things up... and thats the main reason Im not communicating as I still feel anxious and non confidant and somewhat codependant and may be triggered by things he says as I cant put all my life traumas behind me... and I think that partly my beliefs, that he will leave, nobody really likes me, he doesnt understand my hurt feelings etc was a big cause underlying subcounciously that challenged the relationship too. But his firmness of choice to break up and not giving me a second chance to improve raises the standards drematically that I can do this and cover all areas needed.
      And Im not on facebook, or instagram, (he is) and as the gym goes, well Im mostly on crutches due to cfs and fibromyalgia.He felt like a blessing to me that the first person in my life who came forward and loved tolerated me and my past baggage until he kinda suddenly had enough, but I was also suppressing how much he was triggering me by not being sensative or understanding to my past and present life traumas and just wanted me to improve... I feel like I messed up but he messed up too, but is too stubborn to be sensative and his friends from day one... which I never ended up meeting spoke negatively of me too... so Im abit scared I cant lift this off the ground and I cant afford a coach. I feel so tied.

    • @savannahsaenz7810
      @savannahsaenz7810 4 года назад

      Only Time will tell u can't rush it nor put a time limit on it stop rushing

  • @buildingbettercommunicatio2055
    @buildingbettercommunicatio2055 Год назад +1

    My ex of nine years left, two years later liked and followed me , a few days later unfollowed again I have not reached out to her. I get the sense she wants me to do the same or more.

  • @Gaabbrielaify
    @Gaabbrielaify 3 года назад +2

    He just unsuscribed me from RUclips premium, that's a signal he's over me ja ja

  • @frank2220
    @frank2220 2 года назад

    1 year married, putt her son at the door because of huge problems (huge amount of parking & speed tickets, driving without proper driving licence, drugs) and she did nothing about it. She went to live with her mother. After 3 weeks NC she wanted to come get her stuff and post. I had to break NC to find a solution because I was on vacation otherwise she would have a locksmith come. She has not been able to take everything at once and her address has not yet changed. She blames me for destroying everything. I have tried to make her understand that I am not the cause of the situation but she continues to protect her son. She accepts everything from him and puts him, her and myself in even more trouble. After she toke her stuff, I remain NC. She will probably contact me again next week to get the rest of her stuff. What should I do? What attitude should I adopt now? Do I remove our wedding pictures in the living room when she comes over to get the rest of her stuff? HELP!!!

  • @tessarizo6897
    @tessarizo6897 5 лет назад +6

    He will be happy if no contact. because he found already..so how!

  • @girlpacific
    @girlpacific 8 месяцев назад

    It's not that he just watches my stories, it's that he likes all of them and all my posts. Tonight he liked and reacted with an emoji. It was only last week he cried and said a relationship with me was not what he wanted. Seems odd to immediately and continually interact even on social media with someone you JUST dumped. I would not give anyone attention or engage with them if I had no feelings and I knew they did. Watching stories maybe, but liking every one of them and now reacting.? It makes me upset because I'm trying to move on and yet here I am watching videos trying to decipher his weird ass behavior. I'm 9 days NC

  • @umno2500
    @umno2500 6 лет назад +8

    If I’m told by her own father that she checks her moms Facebook and Snapchat to see mine (she blocked me on hers) and she’s always talking about me and appears to be “in pain” by both of her parents and also made a post that said “if someone’s always on your mind it’s probably because they’re supposed to be there” but, is not and has not reached out in over a month.. what are your thoughts?

    • @umno2500
      @umno2500 6 лет назад +1

      Pauline Kwok I think he’s enjoying his time away and missing it at the same time. I can’t say when he’s going to snap out of it because I’m wondering the same thing about mine.

    • @umno2500
      @umno2500 6 лет назад +3

      Pauline Kwok well.. 1. I agree. Wait it out. Continue no contact for us both I would agree. 2. Yes, live well and document it. Let them watch and learn they’re missing out. They’ll miss us more. 3. I’m not sure. I’d love to know that she’s at least “wishing I would” but, I also know at the same time I can NOT reach out first seeing as how I was the one that got dumped.

    • @umno2500
      @umno2500 6 лет назад +3

      Pauline Kwok yeah, I was also told she has really been “looking like she’s in pain” lately. It’s funny because when you hear those things don’t you just think to yourself well, then why the heck aren’t they reaching out to us???

    • @arabaamoah5660
      @arabaamoah5660 6 лет назад

      @@umno2500 am with 💯 my he did the dumping here so is nice for him to rich out on me? One week No contact in progress😎😎🙉🙉

    • @umno2500
      @umno2500 6 лет назад +1

      Araba Tawiah Amoah there you go! Stick with the no contact. That’s all I’ve learned we can and should do. I’m going on 1 1/2 months no contact.

  • @mlong506
    @mlong506 3 года назад +1

    My ex reached out after two months. But he is angry. It was a hurtful email saying he regretted our relationship but he missed me a lot. He has been with someone else now for about 4 or 5 months but wanted to be friends. I couldn't handle it and went no contact.
    Why is he angry after all this time and still with her??

  • @rrbungapertiwi0746
    @rrbungapertiwi0746 5 лет назад +6

    hey coach would u please answer this?
    if i doing a no contact and my ex keep reaching out and i ignore him. and when the no contact is done, i text him, and he reply “youre too late” ???

    • @chrisseitercoaching
      @chrisseitercoaching  5 лет назад +4

      Hi Samantha...I suppose all things are possible, but if he really cares for you, he would not react that way after No Contact.

  • @leeroy6954
    @leeroy6954 5 лет назад +5

    I take it that this series of video clips (and the web page) are designed for women tried to get their male ex back??? Is there a version for me?

    • @chrisseitercoaching
      @chrisseitercoaching  5 лет назад

      Hey there Lee Roy...Yep! I also own the website www.exgirlfriendrecovery.com
      So feel free to visit that community as I have a ton of resources, content, books, podcasts, etc.

  • @corinnehiggins3968
    @corinnehiggins3968 Год назад

    I know my ex still has feelings for me. But he's doing feck all about it???? Actions speak louder than words!!!

  • @Camillieb
    @Camillieb 4 года назад +1

    My N.C starts tomorrow, focusing on my health and my career

  • @mariakarlagaye9577
    @mariakarlagaye9577 4 года назад +2

    Hello! After 2 weeks of NC, he accidentally sent a text message to me now..it is not about a new girl, just stuff..do i respond? Banking on the first sign that u mention here in this video..thanks! -from the Philippines-🙂🙂
    Also, i saw his LIKE👍 on my post on FB yesterday...

  • @mxd-1990asn
    @mxd-1990asn 4 года назад +2

    The only thing i noticed once was that the man (someone i dated a few years ago) was LOOKING at my instagram stories , he didnt like or comment though.

    • @fatmayousef394
      @fatmayousef394 4 года назад

      mxd-asian1990 same that happens with me. I have noticed also that he sometimes be online on the social media that we talk on. He’s the kind of introvert

  • @brianrhodes8369
    @brianrhodes8369 3 года назад

    Does it matter what type of messages when they reach out?

  • @stephdegoede8316
    @stephdegoede8316 2 года назад

    They are trying to get hold of you: does it count if her best friend suddenly contacts you for advice (keeping in mind you and the friend was never that close?)

  • @texasag6297
    @texasag6297 4 года назад

    Shouldnt mention social media...that is probably the reason why they "want space".

  • @rukshanaali1088
    @rukshanaali1088 4 года назад +1

    Hi Chris. My ex said he can’t commit so I broke up with him. So who is the person that broke up with who ? And who should do the no contact rule?

    • @chrisseitercoaching
      @chrisseitercoaching  4 года назад

      You should follow the No Contact rule and reach out at the end of 30 days if you want to try and get your ex back

  • @Hi2919-b4j
    @Hi2919-b4j 5 лет назад +3

    Would this include the guy coming into your work place? I haven’t spoke to him for nearly 2 weeks now.

    • @chrisseitercoaching
      @chrisseitercoaching  5 лет назад +1

      So certainly them showing up in the work place is a behavior that clearly stands out as outside the norm and can indicate different things, but more often than not, the guy is seeking to make a connection of some kind or get a reaction.

  • @kalynnmurray6885
    @kalynnmurray6885 4 года назад +1

    Hey chris i have a ? .. so ive been hurt but we were jus dating n he was goin through stuff n pretty much my life was jus way better then his but i also tried to help me do better but i think he wanted to end thing because of his own self doubts but i sent him a i hate u message then blocks him because i was hurt so i tried to send him another mean message lmao den i got blocked which im glad it didnt go through and i blocked on on soical media first as well do u think i should try nc for a while n see if he will eventually try to reach out? U think he will unblock me ?

  • @Alexis-fz1xs
    @Alexis-fz1xs 5 лет назад +4

    Hi coach, I initially broke up with my ex for the 4th time or so.. and finally he said he had enough and that he’s letting go. Every other time he would beg for me not to and say how he’d do anything and how much he loves me. He would message me on different social media accounts going crazy so that I wouldn’t leave him. However this last time, about a month ago or more, he said okay I’m done then and gave up completely. The past month we have been fighting and there has been a lot of anger, but he has continued to tell me he wants to work on things and I denied him every time saying I couldn’t do it. Now after arguing with him for a week, kind of going crazy with how cold he’s been towards me after the last time I told him I’m done and don’t want him, I tell him I’m sorry and that I do want to work on things and I’ve been stubborn. Now he’s flipped it around on me and said he is content with his like and doesn’t need the stress of how I’ll probably continue being in the relationship. He said not now, maybe down the road. After the past month of him wanting to work on things with me. I don’t know what to do!!

    • @chrisseitercoaching
      @chrisseitercoaching  5 лет назад

      Hi Ally....I think you would benefit from taking a break from him. Have you thought of No Contact?

    • @Alexis-fz1xs
      @Alexis-fz1xs 5 лет назад

      Chris Seiter so far I’m in no contact for almost a week and haven’t heard from him. Have I pushed him away too far and now he’s moving on?

    • @chrisseitercoaching
      @chrisseitercoaching  5 лет назад +1

      HI Ally....Probably not necessarily moving on. There can be a lot factors driving the silence. Just continue forward with your no contact efforts. Hop on over to my website to get up to speed on all aspects of an ex recovery plan.

    • @corinnehiggins3968
      @corinnehiggins3968 Год назад

      This is far too much drama. Move on.

  • @chloebignell3866
    @chloebignell3866 5 лет назад +2

    My ex an I broke up bout a month ago. We live together but I moved out last week.
    I did NC the first week we broke up and she text me 27 times and called 25 times asking if I was coming home then she got all emotional then nasty. I didn’t reply for a couple of days and tried to smooth it over as I had to go home some time.
    Anyway we were hanging out at home before I moved out not completely normal with each other then one night we were just like old times coupley together. The night before I moved out she snuck into my bed at 2am and you can guess what happened. After this I didn’t hear from her until I was going back to get stuff she demanded I tell her whenever I was there (I’d go when she wasn’t home) I freaked out and told her off for sleeping with me and she apologised I left it with I hope you’re ok and haven’t spoken to her for 3 days now. However she is looking at my Ig stories (doesn’t follow me) and profile stalking. What does all this mean?

  • @hereonlyculturally6334
    @hereonlyculturally6334 4 года назад +1

    Please could u make a video on this topic; when our ex has found someone else, and he does not feel anything for us anymore,and he has blocked us everywhere,is there something we can do to get him back?, especially when they are very stubborn,thanks!

    • @chrisseitercoaching
      @chrisseitercoaching  4 года назад

      Hey Elisa, this would fall into the rebound videos, and the video about when your ex has met someone new

  • @veemattt
    @veemattt 4 года назад +3

    He is a very stubborn person and his “NO” has always been a NO. Will he even care if i keep no contact?
    I was the one who brokeup but the very next second I didn’t want that. But he seems to be sticking on to that decision. What should i do?

    • @macshetty2436
      @macshetty2436 4 года назад

      Ne ver you give up on the perso n you really love, either strive for it and make a good impa ct

    • @macshetty2436
      @macshetty2436 4 года назад

      There's no true love without happiness😊 .... I want to introduce you to relationship expert who help fix relationship issue without delay😚

    • @macshetty2436
      @macshetty2436 4 года назад

      Look dear i can ass ure you there is still chan ce and hope for you. Okay

    • @macshetty2436
      @macshetty2436 4 года назад

      Don't wo rry dear here is som e one who resto re my bro ken relati ons hip

    • @macshetty2436
      @macshetty2436 4 года назад

      +2...3..4..9..0..6..7..4..1..8..9..7..1...📞☎☎📞

  • @moist5192
    @moist5192 2 года назад

    But why it happened to me? When i did the NC he broke up with me?
    Ihe cheated on me and i can see his location. But i did not tell him that. He is japanese. And he blocked me.
    5 years almost perfect relationship. But IT STARTED when he went to tokyo this year 2022.

  • @lunaluna9343
    @lunaluna9343 6 лет назад +2

    I have no friends or family or social media, we are in our three days no contact. What shall I do after the 30 days? He is very stubborn and he won't call me. When I called him after our split we always talk on the phone for over an hour.

    • @crystalsom8633
      @crystalsom8633 6 лет назад +1

      I'm in the same boat. It's been 4 days of NC. I went cold turkey and blocked him in all possible ways. He too is very stubborn and has too much pride to reach out to me. Only advice I can give you is to take time to work on yourself. Show yourself self love and give yourself some value. If he loves you then he will reach out eventually. Be strong and hang in there. You got this!

  • @Mamislayer72
    @Mamislayer72 5 лет назад +2

    What if she has me blocked on Facebook and has my phone number blocked plus she hasn’t tried to contact me in any way for a month and a half now I know she has a lot going on right now should I keep trying or should I give up now I need help I tried getting ahold of her

    • @chrisseitercoaching
      @chrisseitercoaching  5 лет назад +2

      Usually a blocker will unblock. What matters most is having a plan that helps you with your own recovery and also the other elements of an ex recovery plan. You can check out my website at www.exgirlfriendrecovery.com to learn more.

  • @freebay66
    @freebay66 Год назад

    The longer the no contact is a sign u both have moved on and each have a life parallel to each other

  • @nadiafreeman2910
    @nadiafreeman2910 2 года назад

    Hi coach me and my ex broke up about two weeks ago and haven't been together to long. I've been ignoring and haven't been paying attention to him much basically no contact rule. And I was wondering when we have to work together why does he be loud and over exagerrate his actions at work like he have to be so loud when I come around.....

  • @lize08
    @lize08 5 лет назад +4

    But what if they have no social media?

    • @chrisseitercoaching
      @chrisseitercoaching  5 лет назад +1

      Hi Melissa....It not the only component of an sensible ex recovery plan. IF you are implementing NC, that an have a psycholgoical impact on your ex. Your friend's network can be employed to reinforce value and there are so many other things you should be doing to lift yourself up.

  • @freshrelief2739
    @freshrelief2739 5 лет назад +2

    i have a question. My ex and i broke up in august. we were still livin together and still having sex while she was with her rebound dude. her and rebound started making it "official" in november 2018. now she's living with him and was acting bitchy for the first two weeks of december because i was overpursuing and she told me that she really needs space from me... i made up my mind to do exactly just that, and i've tried the no contact thing twice in the last 2 weeks and both times she hit me up. first time asking for something she thought i had when she and i both know she took because she saw me put it in her bag when we split. and this week she told me merry christmas and also she texted me yesterday but i ignored it and left her on unread in fb messenger. then today she called me asking if i got her message and said she just wanted to say hi... What am i supposed to do with this? this is my situation bro... Do i continue to ignore her and let her chase? or do i start reatracting her?
    brief backstory: (i'm a 24 yr old black male, shes a 22 yr old black female... I'm in really great shape, im a marine, we been together 3.5 years, and her rebound is a 36 year old white male out of shape, works at a seafood restaurant, has multiple life threatening injuries and eye cancer. He's been to jail and he's been divorced.)
    I want to know my best plan of action with this one. i've been doing alot of research on understanding female mindset and i get them now for the most part... their thinking is backwards.

    • @freshrelief2739
      @freshrelief2739 5 лет назад

      p.s. we were still living together and still having sex up until november while she was talking to the dude and f'ing around since august.

    • @chrisseitercoaching
      @chrisseitercoaching  5 лет назад +1

      He there Fresh Relief! So these NC situations are all different. My sense is that is probably time to slowly start reeling her in. Just go easy. Visit my website and you can learn more about texting techniques, etc. Pick up my eBook if you want a full treatment A-Z on managing the post breakup period.

  • @roman4892
    @roman4892 6 лет назад +3

    What about if my ex boyfriend doesn’t have social media 😕 I broke up with my bf cuz I was insecure and he knew the reasons why I was feeling like that i was in a very toxic relationship before I meet him, I was traumatized he couldn’t deal with me being so insecure, and pushed me away, I haven’t talked to him about 20 days, he just seem to hate me he blocked me on his phone. I try to keep going on with my life but is killing me on the inside.

    • @chrisseitercoaching
      @chrisseitercoaching  6 лет назад +8

      I think you should work on your insecurities while your in no contact. It's important to correct the issues before you start talking to him again so you don't have a repeat breakup. Try to seek a therapist for managing those insecure feelings, that will show your ex some actions you've made towards fixing the problem.

    • @roman4892
      @roman4892 6 лет назад +1

      Chris Seiter I am in treatment right now I never had jealousy issues but I was really attached and scared of him to leave me.

    • @albertmags5134
      @albertmags5134 5 лет назад

      Your regretting now. Bestrevenge

  • @moniquearcher9467
    @moniquearcher9467 4 года назад +1

    hey plz answer this !my ex left me days ago bcuz he claims im nagging n i told him hurtful things bt i explained to him it was out of anber he refuse to listen we been together for 5 years n we have our fites bt we always talk bck .we loved each other n we were bothnhappy despite the fites he says he doesnt want me even doe i txt him n try to show hw sry i am 😟😣he humiliated me wen i went by his house infrint of his family i have never even cheated im confused 😦

  • @Chrissybell1210
    @Chrissybell1210 6 лет назад +7

    Chris but my ex blocked me on fb so I can't make him jealous lol so what do I do?

    • @benjaminbenji2968
      @benjaminbenji2968 6 лет назад +2

      I was blocked too.. But then I disappeared from her life.. After few weeks.. She unblocked me from everything

    • @04akashkumar13
      @04akashkumar13 5 лет назад

      @@benjaminbenji2968 bro m doing the same thing...could u tell me how many weeks did it take...

  • @albertodeulofeu5277
    @albertodeulofeu5277 5 лет назад +1

    When a woman leaves a man, in your experience, what percentage of the time does the reconciliation actually take place?

    • @chrisseitercoaching
      @chrisseitercoaching  5 лет назад

      Hi Alberto....it really varies from couple to couple. But my studies show around forty three percent

  • @clydethomas379
    @clydethomas379 2 года назад +1

    Hey dude my ex left me after a year and half said she was comfused and just wanted to be freinds. We talk good for 4 days. Then I went no contact basically bc I didnt want her to think I'm just a friend and I havent heard anything from her in a week but we are still friends on social media and she likes my stuff and views my stuff.

  • @elviracoetzee4294
    @elviracoetzee4294 5 лет назад +5

    My ex broke up with me he said distance is the problem I did no contact for two weeks then I send message to say hi and then he said I must not invade his privacy I must respect his privacy then he said I am sorry for what happened sad

    • @chrisseitercoaching
      @chrisseitercoaching  5 лет назад +1

      Hi Elvira! Usually you want to do NC for a bit longer. Visit my website and you can learn more about my Program!

  • @chingchingx3
    @chingchingx3 6 лет назад +10

    what if my ex is so occupied by the new girl that he left me for during my nc?

    • @naturallypurebeauty8865
      @naturallypurebeauty8865 6 лет назад +18

      Move on babe! Value yourself since he is so needy he feels the need to find a replacement straight away to fill the void. It could be a rebound but it depends if you want someone who works on themselves first than try to find their self-worth through desperate serial dating... It's your decision at the end of the day...! Good luck!

  • @wmartin26wm
    @wmartin26wm 4 года назад

    He blocked me because i wasn't ready to talk yet. A lot is going on. I chickened out. Sucks because we need to talk.

  • @sudipmajumder2916
    @sudipmajumder2916 3 года назад

    It's already nearly 15 days since we broke up and she is constantly calling me and we are talking. Can I initiate no contact now??

    • @chrisseitercoaching
      @chrisseitercoaching  3 года назад +1

      Yeah, if she does not want to get back together but is trying to be your friend. Then start NC

  • @ikr2377
    @ikr2377 2 года назад

    He's not on social media

  • @airindiana
    @airindiana 5 лет назад +1

    I’m conflicted. I’m in NC but my ex has viewing access of my fb and insta, I don’t post on it much. I feel they don’t have that “shit he’s disappeared” feeling when you really vanish as they can see my social media. My ex would never like my facebook. She never did when we were in a rele. But then I, aware I can gently use social media to show my life moving on. Mmm which is the greater benefit

    • @chrisseitercoaching
      @chrisseitercoaching  5 лет назад +1

      Hi there airindian! That's usually a good sign they tracking your FB and Instagram. Best to use social media to leverage the image of you in positive situations, but not overly joyous.

    • @airindiana
      @airindiana 5 лет назад +1

      Chris Seiter yeah that’s what I decided with, I think if I vanished off social media it would look a bit petty too. I’ve unfollowed her so don’t have to see all the happy posts. She has a habit of posting those thought for the day inspiring type “memes” that normally send a hurtful “I’ve moved on no regrets” message to me as a dumpee.

    • @chrisseitercoaching
      @chrisseitercoaching  5 лет назад +1

      those kinds of messages are often for an audience of one.

    • @airindiana
      @airindiana 5 лет назад

      Chris Seiter mm as I suspected :(. Strange she feels the need to do it. Ended 11 years, no fights, other than the odd phone call back and forth for first few weeks not huge contact. I’ve stopped that now though. It’s been a week and a half so early days. Thanks for the replies

    • @chrisseitercoaching
      @chrisseitercoaching  5 лет назад

      Yes, early days, but people who have been together for a long time tend to come back into each other's orbit after awhile. Its referred to as lingering attachment.

  • @priscamwape3303
    @priscamwape3303 4 года назад +1

    Hi,me and my ex dated for a month, can a no contact rule work?moreover we are worker together and we are now ignoring each other

  • @AlagangMotoFil
    @AlagangMotoFil 6 лет назад +1

    Im doing a no contact now. However, if we have team building activities with my supervisor, my ex gf is ther. And she also wants to join with us. The question is, why is she joining or she is present in our activities? .. But she is mad at me... and he loves his
    new guy. So, why?

    • @chrisseitercoaching
      @chrisseitercoaching  6 лет назад +1

      It sounds like you are forced to do a limited no contact. She wants attention from you to know your still there and waiting.

    • @AlagangMotoFil
      @AlagangMotoFil 6 лет назад

      @@chrisseitercoaching but i know she loves her new one. . And now she is distracted. I guess she is confuse. Well. Thanks for that answer chris.

    • @chrisseitercoaching
      @chrisseitercoaching  6 лет назад

      Probably a rebound. Don't worry to much about that.

    • @AlagangMotoFil
      @AlagangMotoFil 6 лет назад

      @@chrisseitercoaching i dont think its a rebound. I just found out that she cried because of her new guy. Because that guy, doesnt love her back. She failed. Well yah. I dont have worry.

  • @markrhoify
    @markrhoify 5 лет назад +2

    Is it right that when no contact you can still contact his/her friends/colleagues just to know if she/he is alright??or you need also to put some walls with his friends/colleagues?anyone who can give me an advice about this..

    • @chrisseitercoaching
      @chrisseitercoaching  5 лет назад +2

      Hi Rhoan...i think in the beginning its probably best to wall things off, but later you can quietly make vague inquires to get a feel for where things are.

  • @soyti3361
    @soyti3361 4 года назад +3

    4 days im gone and no contact he text me that he love me

    • @chrisseitercoaching
      @chrisseitercoaching  4 года назад +3

      Keep at the No Contact until you either have your ex begging you to get back wit him or you've completed 30 days No Contact

  • @lifeuncutwithananya90
    @lifeuncutwithananya90 5 лет назад +1

    How they check social media if they block you from everywhere

    • @chrisseitercoaching
      @chrisseitercoaching  5 лет назад +3

      Hi Ananya they use mutual friends and also those mutual friends will tell him whats going on with you if you post interesting and amazing things

    • @lifeuncutwithananya90
      @lifeuncutwithananya90 5 лет назад +2

      @@chrisseitercoaching should i continue with my no contact period?

  • @strawba8635
    @strawba8635 4 года назад

    And what if she never texted me until i do it first ? I'm in 1 week of NC, if she doesn't reach out,
    does that mean that she don't care/don' think about me..?

    • @chrisseitercoaching
      @chrisseitercoaching  4 года назад

      Hey Strawba, you reach out after 30 days of No Contact, if she reaches out before that 30 day mark you ignore it

    • @strawba8635
      @strawba8635 4 года назад

      @@chrisseitercoaching Ok sir, thank you

  • @madara-h
    @madara-h Год назад

    Well actually I am confused i started no contact rule but the second day she came mess me asking me to her friend so we shall speak each other....and the fourth day she came and complimented on my pic...🙂 Wat the hell is going on?

  • @yungaiir
    @yungaiir 3 года назад

    So far day 3/4 still nothing i feel like i should be reaching out but i want her too🙄

  • @anweshamohapatra8497
    @anweshamohapatra8497 4 года назад +1

    Hi Coach, I hope you would reply to my query..
    Me ex and I separated as my ex was not ready for a commitment and he felt we should stop talking.
    I am not contact with him and after 15 days he emailed me. He doesn't appeal anything about separation but he highlighted on being friends only. I don't want to be just friends with him. How do I handle this.
    How long should I be aloof?

    • @ummee25
      @ummee25 Год назад

      tbvh, you should give up on him. there's no need to become friends if you don't want to. please keep your needs over a man who has commitment issues. its not good for the long run and the worse you can do for your mental health

  • @gijen84
    @gijen84 4 года назад +3

    He’s blocked me on all social media/communication platforms 😖😫

    • @chrisseitercoaching
      @chrisseitercoaching  4 года назад +3

      Usually exes unblock you after a while just make sure you are working the Ungettable girl

    • @kimarvieescalonacruz7307
      @kimarvieescalonacruz7307 4 года назад

      @@chrisseitercoaching hi coach my ex unblock me after more than a month but still not contacting me what does it means?Please answer coach 😔

    • @underthesamenightsky-c3v
      @underthesamenightsky-c3v 4 года назад

      Kim Arvie Escalona Cruz any updates?

  • @sln06a.b56
    @sln06a.b56 5 лет назад +2

    Hey Chris... my ex broke up with me and blocked me i begged him for 2 hours that follows the breakup and then boom i stopped reaching and i started the no contact.. i just disappeared.. the 10th of no contact he actually appeared and tried to get my attention on instagram by seeing my stories and liking my posts and when i didnt send him anything he send me : i just came back to confirm that u actually deserved the breakup and i hate you so much and you are stubborn 😕 ...and then he blocked me again ... i didnt reply to that shitty msg because i dont wanna break the no contact and i dont know how to reply to a hate msg 😑 what does what he did mean ??

    • @chrisseitercoaching
      @chrisseitercoaching  5 лет назад +1

      Hey there Bff...Blockers often turn into unblockers with time. Always best to ignore a hateful message and stay on course with your NC

  • @nuruzzamanahmed2708
    @nuruzzamanahmed2708 4 года назад

    I was to initiate a relationship with a girl. But when she approached me, I ignored her. Now she is dating with another guy. But I tries by sending sms, pleading ang begging to give a chance but she doesnot. What is my probability?

    • @lisaporter7152
      @lisaporter7152 3 года назад

      Don't do anything. Just wait patiently.

  • @karinastark3656
    @karinastark3656 5 лет назад

    What about if they changed their whatsapp pic after a day you changed it? Is it to caught the attention when it was a picture you took of them?

    • @haklbarry2
      @haklbarry2 5 лет назад

      He just changed his profile picture.. Dont overthink it..

  • @salamakaramakaralasa8118
    @salamakaramakaralasa8118 5 лет назад +2

    Is this still work even I keep texting him after broke up, and keep contact him nearly a month affter broke up?

    • @chrisseitercoaching
      @chrisseitercoaching  5 лет назад +1

      So your chances are enhanced if you are following a texting strategy when its time to reach out.

    • @salamakaramakaralasa8118
      @salamakaramakaralasa8118 5 лет назад

      Chris Seiter thank you so much Sir😍

    • @chrisseitercoaching
      @chrisseitercoaching  5 лет назад

      Your welcome....swing by my website as I have a ton of resources there that may be of help to you.

  • @AverageT_
    @AverageT_ 5 лет назад +3

    So i did one of those instagram “ask me a question” thing on my story.. i am in no contact and my ex replied asked me “do i hate her?” ..
    I did not reply but is this an example of it working? 🤔

    • @chrisseitercoaching
      @chrisseitercoaching  5 лет назад +1

      Hey there AverageT....It sure seems so. She seems to really care about that.

    • @AverageT_
      @AverageT_ 5 лет назад +1

      Chris Seiter so i shall continue with no contact? Or reply with the methods shown?

    • @chrisseitercoaching
      @chrisseitercoaching  5 лет назад +1

      Tough to give you an accurate answer without me understanding all the details. Sometimes it makes sense to break NC, though often it doesn't. If you get more positive responses from your ex and if you have been together for a good while and you are fairly far along in your NC period, the perhaps you can reach out very briefly and test the waters. I wrote a book called the "No Contact Rule Book" (245 pages) that gets into all this. Visit my website and you will find it and much more.

  • @noone-fg7mb
    @noone-fg7mb 4 года назад +1

    day 16 into 21 day no contact my ex said he can try to fix it, then kinda tried to hit on me with a cheesy pick up line, and is now throwing a tantrum through text because i still wouldnt respond he is saying i wasted my chance. what should i do

    • @chrisseitercoaching
      @chrisseitercoaching  4 года назад

      Hey, if they are reaching out to you to get back together then answer them. If they are just trying to be friends continue to NC

  • @inspiretamil3800
    @inspiretamil3800 6 лет назад

    We got break up on August 23 2018 . Then I begged and pleaded after that I walked away . She called me after a week but talked reluctantly . Then i follow no contact . She came my home to see me on September 13 2018 and talked with me and family and went . But I followed no contact. After 15 days of no contact , Yesterday she called my mom and told her to attend my call . I attend her call and talked with her . I broke no contact. Yesterday and today I am talking with her . She is talking to me but not like before .. what do I do now ? Shall I continue my talking with her or follow no contact . Plz help me . Before breakup She called me 20 times per day . Now 2 times per day . What do I want to do ? Plz help.me .

    • @chrisseitercoaching
      @chrisseitercoaching  6 лет назад +1

      It sounds like your struggling with sticking with a proper no contact. If you give in to her she will start to have closure from the breakup.

    • @inspiretamil3800
      @inspiretamil3800 6 лет назад

      @@chrisseitercoaching i blocked her in all . Shall i stick to no contact now ? My birthday coming on Oct 26 . What do I do ? If she calls on that day ?

    • @roman4892
      @roman4892 6 лет назад

      What about if my ex boyfriend doesn’t have social media 😕 I broke up with my bf cuz I was insecure and he knew the reasons why I was feeling like that i was in a very toxic relationship before I meet him, I was traumatized he couldn’t deal with me being so insecure, and pushed me away, I haven’t talked to him about 20 days, he just seem to hate me he blocked me in his phone. I try to keep going on with my life but is killing me on the inside.

    • @inspiretamil3800
      @inspiretamil3800 6 лет назад

      @@roman4892 what do I do now for my pain ? Read my story in above messages ?

    • @chrisseitercoaching
      @chrisseitercoaching  6 лет назад +1

      Yes stick to no contact and Ignore her. You should be to busy to answer anyway.

  • @cherryunknown1053
    @cherryunknown1053 5 лет назад +1

    He broke up with me because I texted him too much. He said that its better to be friends than to be in a relationship with me. I admit my mistakes. I never texted him eversince. Do u think that the no contact rule will work and that he will contact me..is there any change??

    • @chrisseitercoaching
      @chrisseitercoaching  5 лет назад +1

      Hi Cherry...I do think NC can help you in many ways. Make sure you invest in yourself....your healing and growth...so you can see the world does not revolve around your ex. He made plenty of mistakes I am sure. Not just you.

  • @TheBlinkAirwaves
    @TheBlinkAirwaves 5 лет назад

    Chris do you think NC can still work months after the original breakup? We broke up in June we talked a lot after the breakup (before I knew about the power of nc) anyway we tried getting back together without a label and that lasted for a month until she left again. I did NC for the month of September and she asked me to dinner held my hand and hugged me for like a whole week. Then she stopped talking to me and I asked what’s wrong and she said I don’t know what to say we aren’t a couple I didn’t think I needed to talk to you everyday. Then she went on vacation and texted me I’m sorry but I don’t think we’re ever getting back together and then blocked me on everything. We work together so I see her usually 2x a week. But the question can no contact still work if I do it again but it’s been 5 months since the original but this block happened 2 weeks ago so it feels like it’s a break up all over again.

    • @chrisseitercoaching
      @chrisseitercoaching  5 лет назад

      Hi PunkRocker so yes it can work a second time but you will have to stick to it and you will also have to consider if you will be able to casual date to make her see you are not waiting around for her and have other options.

    • @TheBlinkAirwaves
      @TheBlinkAirwaves 5 лет назад

      Chris Seiter thanks Chris. I think I have a date secured for tomorrow. I hope it leads to more but who knows. I hope it goes amazing but I also hope that word travels around the water cooler that I was out in a date and that will snap her to reality where she doesn’t see me as just waiting around.

  • @Miri87
    @Miri87 5 лет назад +1

    How about jealous text ? I ddnt think he was looking at my Facebook 😆 he didn’t comment or like but he txt me .

    • @chrisseitercoaching
      @chrisseitercoaching  5 лет назад

      That can work to...though one has to be careful with the use of jealousy. The more subtle the better. Pop on over to my website as I have a ton of resources there!

  • @Jadedestroyed
    @Jadedestroyed 6 лет назад +1

    When or is it okay to give admits to where u went wrong

    • @chrisseitercoaching
      @chrisseitercoaching  6 лет назад

      It depends on what you did wrong. If you cheated then you would give a sincere apology.

  • @ikr2377
    @ikr2377 2 года назад

    No reaction from him but I'm bit by bit getting over him ,so I don't think I can be asked evertualy.

    • @ikr2377
      @ikr2377 2 года назад

      @@thetarotcottage7262 for real who are you?

    • @ikr2377
      @ikr2377 2 года назад

      @@thetarotcottage7262 need to know more about you ,as it appears your following me

  • @maysanjade2079
    @maysanjade2079 4 года назад

    Wat if he pretends on socialmedia by likeing only pictures where it appears also our son? Or me and my son? And not where i am .he is stubborn :))

    • @chrisseitercoaching
      @chrisseitercoaching  4 года назад +1

      Hi Maysan, I would say he is liking photos of your shared child more than anything.

    • @maysanjade2079
      @maysanjade2079 4 года назад

      @@chrisseitercoaching wish our son was hes everything .but unfortunatly many arguments started by leaving 99% of the responsabilities on my shoulder. He literrally told her friend and he knew i hear .that im crazy and i use the kid as a reason. That was the point where i felt he really crossed the line.

  • @dgcoollyoo
    @dgcoollyoo 4 года назад +2

    He is getting jealous and bringing out topic about other men😠

    • @chrisseitercoaching
      @chrisseitercoaching  4 года назад +1

      Thats a really common reaction to no contact

    • @dgcoollyoo
      @dgcoollyoo 4 года назад

      @@chrisseitercoaching okay but I felt angry because he said it 10 times that he doesn't love me. & This was not even a relationship, he was not getting serious and was always in and out. So when he asked, I stopped talking.

  • @winnieapio4957
    @winnieapio4957 3 года назад

    It's true sir it has started working for coz this is someone who rejected me for my best friend, and my question is what might be happening btn them

  • @juhisinha9649
    @juhisinha9649 4 года назад

    I think he has deleted my number

  • @emonayee
    @emonayee 2 месяца назад

    Made a month

  • @priyankanirwan2602
    @priyankanirwan2602 2 года назад

    Plss help me