Why Silence Is Important After A Breakup
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- Опубликовано: 23 июл 2024
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Why Silence Is Important After A Breakup
Today were going to talk about why I believe silence is important after a break up. But what do I mean by silence? It depends on what you want to do after your break up, if you want to move on or if you want to try and get your ex back.
Here is the important thing, no matter what your situation is, the most important thing after a break up is that you follow something that I call the No Contact Rule. Now for those of you who do not know what a No Contact Rule is, it is a set amount of time where you and your ex don’t talk, no matter the circumstance. That means you won’t be reaching out to him to talk after the break up and if he reaches out to you, you simply ignore him until your No Contact is over.
But why is this time out so important to do after a break up?
I was curious to see how people react after a break up. I surveyed my audience, people said they got angry, frustrated, begged for their ex back, lost appetite the usual break up emotions. But one thing that came up consistently is that they couldn’t stop talking to their exes. Whether that’s their ex getting into a pattern of talking to them again, or them getting back into a pattern of talking to their exes again.
As you can see, silence isn’t an often-used strategy in these circumstances but why not?
Well I think it is important that I make a case why silence is important after a break up, silence can be used in many different ways. There is the No Contact Rule, or the Radio Silence Rule that my competitors use. There are five main reason that I suggest you follow the No Contact Rule.
Its best to view this as your advantages;
#1 - You appear more powerful
So here is what i find happens when someone engages into a conversation with an ex after a break up. People talk too much in a way to validate themselves. They want to go back to what they feel is comfortable making themselves look a fool. Then there are those who talk too much to rub things in their exes faces. They make themselves appear weak. Where someone who stays silent looks stronger and as if they are not as bothered about the break up.
#2 - Action vs Words
What is interesting about this No Contact Rule is where clients feel the need to tell their ex that they are going to not contact them for 30 days. We have found that it is more powerful and meaningful when you just go silent.
#3 - It gives you a chance to listen and observe
Breakups are essentially an agent of change. There are moments in life that can be the most stressful, moving house, losing your job and break ups. This is where you need to take this opportunity as making a change. If you are obsessed with what your ex is doing, you don’t realise what there is to improve your life. Often people go through one track mind to get their ex back. They don’t really sit back and observe the kind of person they are.
#4- It allows time for self-reflection
So, these two are kind of intertwined, where you sit back and listen it gives you some time to self-reflect on yourself. One thing that is clear, you are not going to get your ex back unless you are willing to give some time to yourself. Working on yourself enough to learn who you are as a person, who your ex is as a person and the things that you have done wrong in your relationship to make it fail.
#5 - Your ex will be the one seeking answers
This is the number one known advantage to using the No Contact Rule, your ex is going to be looking for answers. People who are in relationships get into patterns talking to the same person every day through texting or phone calls. Where a lot of people keep doing that after the break up. Where if you go into No Contact without warning they are going to want to reach out to you more to find out why you are not talking to them and they end up chasing you.
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I have a rule. I just pretend like they never existed. Sure its not the best way but perfect
It doesnt apply if your ex doesnt really love you in the first place ..so just move on ..
I like the way you think. plus your photo nice.
yeah...
4:30am watching this video. First day of no contact. 💔
I know exactly how you feel,you will be fine 💞💕
Any update?
@Jennifer John me please..
Me too
Idek how long I should stop talking to him for
This is really effective. We recently talked again after almost 2 months of breakup. And now we're cool.
Great!
Does it really work
@@prakashpoudel2977 i swear it does, but remember to make yourself better in the process of no contact rule. Me and ex are now fine after 2 months of not talking to each other. Though I really think it depends on the reason why you two broke up.
Did he contact u??
Minette Taopo are you fine and back together? Or just having conversation
After we break up i never talk to him i let him realize what he Lose and i focus on my dream goal so i could achieve it
Thats great very UG :)
Am doing the same here
Same here. Almost 3 years. I changed my number ASAP. Not a text and not a call from me. I thank God for making me strong during those difficult nights and days. It's extremely hurtful but I made it. Silence equates to class.
I did this as well! After 2 weeks he was with someone else. Good luck to him, I’m focusing on me!
It’s been 5 days and I miss him so much! I tried reaching out 2 days ago , but it just made me look desperate :( But now I’m here watching this video, hopefully it works and he eventually contacts me.
Evelyn Lewis yes! We got back together after a month!!!
@@jackie8138 are you guys still together?
@@sakshisaha2392 no! It actually ended like 3 months later , but it’s been over a year and I’m in a happier relationship! So things worked out for the better
@@jackie8138 I'm happy for u :)
Very useful video . I really like it
Thanku Chris. I m already silent after break up. But this video made me stronger.
Great to hear! Keep going!
Just want you to know that this video helps a lot :) . It’s so tough not talking to him. Thank you 😊
Glad it helped!
3 days of no contact and I'm cool 😎 Ive gain so much confidence and I feel very comfortable with myself. Im in love with myself more and more 😍 He texted me but I be ignored it for 2 days :) 😚😚😚 I'm cool.
@Joys Pedro1 number
Just got my heart broken today.... I am so depressed and broken
awww noooo im feeling the same, how are you now? did anything get resolved, i feel im handling the break up all wrong as there is so much info out there thats all different it gives me a headache by the end of the day lol
update?
@@itsbritneybitch69 hello! how did it go? were you guys togheter after?
@@merrax7773 well i did go silent no txts messages nothing and after prob 3 weeks when i was starting to feel a tiny bit less obsessed he txt me out of the blue, ended up coming to mine for 2 nights got my hopes up but no he had been seeing someone else aswell as me for a few months
he cut me off after being really horrible i got very depressed was off work for 2 months then dusted myself off realised what a nasty peice of work he was and met someone totally perfect last april who loves me to bits and i love him to bits
point of this is, no romantic interest is worth having to play games with, if its meant to be it will be cool fun easy and loving from both sides
@@itsbritneybitch69 great, thank you! :D
nice advice sir thank you
You're Welcome
1st day of no contact rule.After 9yrs of being together.Can't wait to give you an update.
Good luck!!
update ??
Great video sir
Thank you.
what if he said "maybe in the future, but it's not guaranteed"? in response to getting back together? i sorta annoyed him by constantly asking this question but his response was this every single time.
Hi Monica, work on yourself so that you are focus on becoming Ungettable and let your ex see the positive changes you are making to yourself
Hey Chris, my ex just broke up with me and said she wanted to maintain a friendship. We kept messaging a bit the day after but then I discovered your website and the NC process, took your quiz and it said my circumstance was rated "Above Average". She said she's open to the possibility of getting back together after some time to herself but wanted to remain friends in the process.. Is No Contact appropriate for this situation or will she think I don't want anything to do with her and just move on? Im worried since I started talking friendly after the breakup that if suddenly cut her out it wont work..
Just asked a simple question and got the most heartbreaking breakup ever...I don't know what to feel and what not to feel but what I know is that am Brocken.
@@alexnanny3217 okay I'll WhatsApp now
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Very good work sir.. also u replied to all your fans thats the best kind hearted person you are
I recommend you to a great man,who can help you manifest whatever u wannna manifest💯💯
He helped me bring back my ex few days ago,without any delay💖💝
Watzzap him**
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There is nothing to say, if he cared about you he would not have blocked you.
Not true , I had to block my ex because it hurt to much to see her on social media . Not because I don’t care about her
@@mgaleoutdoors I'm trying my best to do so
M Gale Outdoors did you break up with her
@@mgaleoutdoors i did that also. Kept breaking my heart when I would see her post happy pictures and posts meanwhile I was dying. It helps in the healing process.
If he doesnt block you ..it means he didnt care ..hes not affected by what he sees or hears from you ...so rejoiced ur ex still cares for you thats why he blocked you ..
What if my ex and I have been broken up for a month. She has yet to stop texting me “how amazing we were” and “how lucky we were” and sending songs we listened to and pictures of us and even pictures of me saying “I miss this guy” but then I asked to meet to talk she says the day of.. “I don’t think I want to, sorry” but then silence for two weeks and then another text of song lyrics stating “my kiss brought her back to life” and also saying “that will ever be true” what do I respond with seeing as how my simple responses have dragged it out this long and no forward movement has occurred regarding us being together.
Hi Jay this is showing she is holding onto the past relationship more than wanting you back. If you have not done so yet, complete a NC of 30 days and ignore anything she sends to you for those 30 days and then reach out, but not about the relationship or about meeting up just start a conversation about something she would be interested in and end it before she does
Please help. She said she didn’t want to continue anymore because we got in a little argument and I told her she should just leave as this won’t work if you’re not gonna move with me. She left because I didn’t do anything to stop her from leaving, I just let her walk out the door. 2 days later we talked about us but before that in the day we went to eat and we’re making out the whole time, holding hands, saying I love you to each other and that she doesn’t wanna leave me. We have the talk later that day and says she doesn’t wanna continue cause I didn’t do anything to stop her from leaving. She still wants to work out together and keep in touch. What do I do? Still be friends and communicate? I want her more then anything
We’ve broken up since Sunday which was a week ago. We last spoke on Tuesday 08/31/21.
I went on no contact 09/01/21… he literally
Just watched my bf story and also did tell me when we last spoke “ He needs space and time.”
I’m not buying into it. I’m not contacting him. I’m just doing me.
I used the no contact rule after he broke up with me last month and I told him that I needed time to figure out our relationship and blocked him at the same time because I didn't get into endless message situation, however, I sent him an email after I got my thoughts. Then I called him two nights ago but he was furious and said that why I didn't wanna say anything for a month and suddenly I wanted to talk. He said that he really believe our relationship is over and I should be mature enough to accept that. I tried to convince him to get our relationship one more chance to work it out with me but he said that he couldn't do it any more because he would go back his country in summer and I'm never on his path and can't be in his future. He told him that he was angry too... he didn't reply after I told him that I knew that he would go back home after all since we started in September 2017 but now I could go with him and it's the first time I'm actually willing and thinking to go with someone wherever he goes. I wanna fight for it this time. He broke up with me once before and it took us more than a year to get back together but I fucked it up this time because something I said really hurt him and he said he's a man with dignity. I really want him back
And what if he sent a SMS saying "I am sorry but I don't want contact anymore, you were always good to me but now that's it. All the best for your life"....so it's a goodbye forever? :(
Hey Chris,
Last week my boyfriend of 5 months broke up with me and moved out of state. He moved back home. We have talked everyday and have been really civil. Hes coming back in a couple of weeks to get the rest of his things. We've agreed to meet up for coffee. I miss him so much. What can I do? He says he wants me to be so independent that I don't need him. I'm establishing no contact starting today and just feel very lonely. Especially after work because we met there.
He will help you bring him back and he will love you like never before
Amazing👏👏👏
Thank you! 😊
Verry effective
Right!
I know that iam never gonna get him back but with a Lil hope iam watching all these kinds of videos to make myself evrthing will be fine :)
He contacted me after 1 day of NC but I ignored him till now...
Hey coach please help me. Tomorrow will be our 1 month since the break up. I tot we were good and suddenly wen she got angry with mr and messed up i asked her if she still has feelings for me and she said she only feels pitty on me thats why i let her go and give up. If i will do NC is there any chance that she will miss me? Please reply
Do you really want to get your ex back
2 months ago he broke up with me. After 3 years latter he can't see our future together. He said he was soft so he thought we can be together but now he become strong and he feel we can’t be together. But i cant live without him..sir please help me..whats should i do... We are in no contact.. But its couldn’t help....i am desperate to patch up.. But he even dont want to listen my name..now how can i back him my life?
We broke up 4 months ago im the one who caused the break up because of what I been through life, work, stress, covid ,losing job but she doesn't accept my explanation..and I used to plead and beg call text tried to do the no contact then broke it , but yesterday finally we met and I made a nice birthday gift, she saying that whether its me or someone else shes not thinking of any relationship this year, but i can feel there is a chance we can get back and sometimes I get bad vibes she would move on and I lose her .. any tips ?
I really need your help me and my ex broke up like almost a year ago like a couple months and one minute we are good and then he just don’t wanna talk and I want him back he keeps ignoring me saying he don’t have a problem with me but he doesn’t need to be texting and he keeps pushing me away what do I do
Chris do you think my ex will ever come back? We were long distance and he changed numbers and blocked me everywhere and he deleted our pictures. I know he still loves me, but I'm worried he is too chicken to apologize and comeback after 1 year of memories. I'm going no contact. But is there a chance??? I know he is a very sensitive person and he not the type to go out and party. He's kinda an introvert and very family oriented. But I know his mom told him to change his number. I know he's my soulmate. But he got cold and mean right after the breakup. I love him. I miss him. But I hope he can miss me and comeback... i need to know if there is a chance. I hope you can respond
This is same for my situation now I'm going 2 weeks of no contact now, he unfriend on Facebook and blocked me on ig and WhatsApp for good even after Thanksgiving I didn't reach out for anything more but he slowly removed me, but I'm in positive way and not going to chase him and not contact his friends and family, the radio silence works or not work we never knows, and I still don't know if one day he will unblock me but I believe because we both are soulmate and we will get back together again when everything getting better and when we both get back our confident, stay strong I miss my ex too but I have to respect and give him a break up and space to realize what he miss in our relationship, and I'm in long distance and my ex he very stubborn and big head, not disturb them just working on myself and believe that they will come running back when you or me find ourself back, sorry if my English is bad, stay strong and all the best, take care
Hi Mariel if you work on yourself and the Ungettable information and then start the texting phase with your ex they are going to see positive changes in you and hopefully while working up the value ladder you re attract your ex
No contact is very effective i believe because a lot of dating coach and psychologist teaching it.
Do it to get your respect back and not to get him back .. just stay silent and move on
Hi! My ex has me blocked on everything and is also liking another woman’s photos. They have told me they have let go. I did the quiz on your website and it said 72% . But I really don’t know. Do I still have a chance maybe?
Hey Penelope, you need to not be watching your exes social media and start your No Contact
What if my ex is an avoidant and it's what he does best, it started out with him ghosting me, then he is replying cordially after a month, but still sensing anger in him and only picking on the bad parts of relationship. He did this weird thing of deleting pics of our holidays and just letting some neutral pics of us remain on ig.Can NC still work now? Either way, I'm going silent.🙏
Yes NC is still your only chance. He needs distance and space from you. With distance and time he will think about you, he may try to connect with others and that’s good because if he’s avoidant then he won’t be able to connect with them in the same way and that will make him start valuing you more, you not reaching out will also show your level of self respect. Wait until he reaches out to you. He will and be prepared that it will NOT be anything specific to the breakup or anything meaningful. You can’t respond with heaviness or seriousness, keep it light, when reconnecting once he reaches out the goal is to show him that you two can connect lightly.
@@mattshenkerwhat thank u Matt🙏 yes, I think he is subtly trying to test grounds by posting jokes on ig ( I do that habitually for fun to destress) , but I don't want to partake in this and just want to wait till he ready to reach out via a text or so. I think social media can complicate things and have since uninstalled ig. My gut feeling is that he deleted the pics to show he is angry, trying to get a response from me, or hurt me, but I really don't want to play that game.
Keep failing and lossing, and learning,..xxx
Hi Chris..i appreciate your philosophy about relationships.
My question is how many times this no contact rule work on same person? N don't u think without any communication u can destroy relationship, because i hv read somewhere that communication gap can kill relationship. Do xs forget u in this no contact period?
Regards : 🌹
Hey there, so with No Contact, it can work on an EX not a current partner. The relationship has already broken down and split so it would not cause more damage. In fact I have proof through research that every successful client who has had their ex back completed a full No Contact rule as that space and time was needed for each person. Exes do not forget their partner in the 21/30/45 days of no contact, that is not possible. It gives them time to move past the break up, and their negative feelings that they have towards each other and in most cases start to remember the better times they shared.
Whats app him
+(234)-815-974-2833.
Chris Seiter Thank you very much Chris for replying. I got ur idea about no contact rule n got an idea that they r not going to forget u in some amount of time. But my question was that IS NO CONTACT RULE WORK FOR SAME PERSON MORE THAN ONE TIME /like one time applied no contact rule n x came back , again there is some problem in between two people n again can anyone apply no contact rule for same person? I mean to ask that. Anyways thank u 🙏🏻 once again for replying, wishing u n ur loved ones a great health and happiness ❤️🌹🙏🏻
I am not against this at all. It works and has much value for many. Yet, for me, if my boyfriend goes into no contact with me, that is the end of the relationship with me. I cannot rely on a person who does this because we argued and there are some problems. Life requires a good partner, and if a man needs to do that with me, I know he is not the right person for me. I move on immediately regardless of how much I miss him. It won't work out in the long run anyway, so why waste time and energy for both of us. Being able to be there and present for good and bad is one of the great qualities I require in my life partner. After a fight, if he says he needs some time and space, or he just disappears for a while and does not contact me, or does not respond to my calls for a week, I am already moving on. It is his loss.
How i wish i can do this
This is the exact scenario I’m in. I needed this comment more than anything, a quote I read ages ago along the lines of “you think you’re on you’re own and you pick up a piece of literature and you realise someone has experienced the exact pain and heart ache” being human we need others’ to have shared this. Thank you, he has told me to leave me alone for a week and it’s been so difficult but like you said a good life partner stays through good and bad. Just as I have with him.
Same. It’s okay to take a day off to think but week? What are we unknown people now? Sorry but I value myself. I value my energy and love I give. If he doesn’t want to figure this out by talking then there’s no way we can work together
So, you're supposed to tell them you're done and disappear? No reasons as to why? Some of us are pushed to the point of making the call, but, being an adult, you should let them know exactly what they did wrong and why you're chosen to give up on them. That's just common courtesy.
Chris, She texted and called me after 10weeks of nc and told me to never hesitate to call her. Then 5 days later she texted again but I also found out that night she was with her rebound. She contacted me again later that same night but didn’t mention him and said she’d call me the next day to hear about my week. The next day she texted me but never called asking me if I would trade her something. I replied and then was left on read. That was 12 days ago. It has been 12 more days of silence after she reached out to me 3 times that week. She is also in another state for potentially 4 more weeks. I don’t know if I should reach out now since she did already or keep waiting. I don’t know why she talked to me after 10 weeks of silence and then just went silent again.
Same here
Lol, that's the mind game. Keep your cool and focus on yourself. She is already in a rebound as you said, then just ignore her, she feels you can be reachable at anytime hence she plays the game. Get your respect back with no contact
Hey Punk Rocker, so when we say to stick to a No Contact, it includes when they reach out to you too,. You need to do a solid 30 days of not speaking or replying to them. If you want to get your ex back after you have completed a 30 day NC period then you can reach out with a text that is going to interest your ex and hopefully get you two having a short positive conversation for the first time in a while and you can build up from there
Just for the RUclips algorithm. I don’t want my ex back
I borderline harassed her for about 2 weeks after the breakup calling her and texting her daily. She’s been extremely patient and kind to not ignore or block me but she has told me that we both need to move on and be apart from one another’s lives for awhile. Her friends talked her into blocking me but she doesn’t wanna do that just yet, I told her to trust me I’ll stop. Am I doomed Chris? We’re in LDR btw
Hey Teo, so you would need to do a long 45 day NC and be sure that you do not break at all, otherwise you are going to put yourself in the "Crazy" category and that is something you really do not want
Do you really want to get your ex back
I know of a better way
To get your ex back to you now
Contact him on WhatsApp now
What is the song at the start of the video anyone know?
Recordando Tauro
About the no contact rule: Do you think this could work even if he sent a SMS saying he doesn't want contact anymore and wishes me the best for my life? I mean that sounds pretty final, doesn't it? We tried to stay friends after he broke up but my feelings were too strong. Been 3 weeks now since that last message, I didn't reply to that, maybe I should have though. I am so desperate, just want to talk to him again but he also blocked me on Whatsapp :(
hey Chris! so, my ex broke up with me this week on Monday after just getting past a year long relationship and I've made every mistake that you could probably think of doing within the past few days after.
- I called him every single night, begging and pleading for him to come back
- I told him I loved him AND missed him
- I apologized constantly and attempted to bargain him by "being willing to change".
I just now applied the "No Contact" rule starting today by leaving him on read, since he's attempted to contact me first everyday since then. I just wanna know if it's a bit too late now to start it or if I already ruined it all and how I can "reverse" it so that I can get him back.
hey any update on this??
@@shannonwilliams8351 hey dear. How are you, I would like you to email me so we can talk. smnabramo@gmail.com
Love yourself more and focus your self improvement. Decline your attention to him so that he will become crazy for reaching you out. Until you'll come back to him if you are now ready to commit yourself. We just only live once. So enjoy yourself more. Knowing yourself is the beginning of wisdom.
I AM GOING THROUGH THIS RIGHT NOW OMG):
My gf broke up with me and left me on NC, I’ve been giving her the space she needs but during the last texts before NC she was very hostile. It came out of no where. I am sad an broke obviously but I dont Know! what to do
After no Nc I started to search her fb account from my frn acc. When she knew I was searching her then she blocked my frn acc but she unblocked my acc on Facebook that time i didn't txt her but after 3days again she blocked me. After she blocked me I send a text only calling her name on whatapp she was seen my txt but she didn't respond and blocked on whatapp also what is she thinking ?? Is she love me or not???
Iam goin to apply this
Awesome
Do you really want to get your ex back
Can you help me.pls I did a no contact rule for 3days and it works he tried to text me and reach out I ignored him. But the problem aftr 4 days I had talked.to him and it's the same.thing he wanted to be alone and let go of me but that 3 days made him miss me the problema now can I. Do that again that no contract rule will it still work again thankyou very much
You broke NC too soon, he started worrying that he had lost you and then you reassured him that you hadn't gone anywhere. Complete a solid 30 days without replying to him this time
@@chrisseitercoaching nah no contact forever until they reach out
if I do silence, will she move on easily? it is a long distance of us but we met every mounths. i want to wait her but if she move on i might waste the time. can anybody answer me please
Hey thunder, she will not move on easily if you go into NC, if you continue to chase her when she needs a break you are going to push her away.
The odds here is you should be an alpha male dominant. Do not beg her to come back to you. Observe them if they will reach you out. Be a man! In no contact rule, do not just sit back and wait her messages. It's just a waste of time. Instead, you should do some chores or busy yourself. You'll have to change yourself. Because surely she will reach you out. Peace 👍
How do I get my ex back after she ignores me
He didn't call me in 3days, sometimes he send good morning picture,,after 3days it happen few times not only one's or twice,so I called him and asked what happened to you,, his reason is nonsense,,so i told him,,
If my message or call is disturbing on you, sorry i won't disturb you anymore,since you already get or got what you want from me,,,
He just read only didn't say anything,
Is my message wrong or right ?
Need your advice please
Do you really want to get your ex back
Just an update. My ex reached out after 3 weeks of no contact . Asking me to “Hang out” aka having dinner. I’m not sure what to do but I guess it did work
That's a promising sign, be sure to stick with the program if you want to make this work.
You are right
@Anna Daley ok
What if he is also using the no contact rule...?
If I just begged and pleaded my ex by texting in a month, then I went no contact. Do I still have a chance to get her back? Is it too late to do no contact in my case Coach?
Hey there, no it is not too late to do a no contact in this situation. It is actually a lot more common than you think
@@chrisseitercoaching thank you Coach, you inspired me. Wish you jave a good day
How did it go
@@sydneeball4077 do you need help to get your ex back
@@sydneeball4077 I can help you out
My ex boyfriend have already move on he us other girl but I told him to concentrate with the new relationship and I cut of communication
This is good, heal properly and focus on you. Its going to bite him when you move onto someone else.
I went no contact almost 2 weeks ago and today got caught up in bait texts from him. Should I just jump back into no contact?
Stop spamming comments!
Should I not wish him on his birthday also ...he's not talking with me and in 8 days his birthday is there I'm confused
What if no contact worked, he texted me after 3 weeks but then for talking for about 3 weeks he stopped answering and it’s been almost a month now
@@louisemeryem8024 send this way need help
@@louisemeryem8024 whete is it
This is just too painful. No appetite. No sleep. My mind runs wild as to how a person can just switch off their feelings. I care too much & he simply just doesn’t care! It’s leaves you with a feeling in the pit of your stomach, was I ever enough!
Now we went 5 days but he kept blowing up my phone. I couldn’t take it anymore lol. So I answered the phone. He would want to hang out and I’ll say no. Can that work too? Whenever he wants to meet up I’ll say I have to check my schedule or he will text me and I won’t respond
Watzap him.
((+234-815-974-2833
Didn’t know Luka Doncic was a relationship coach..!!
I need y’all help I don’t know what’s going on with my husband he stopped calling me and everytime I call him or text him he doesn’t call or text me back so what should I do my friend we have four kids together n he doesn’t want divorce me.
Joyner Lucas thank you my friend
Kalima
Please take advice from imam, follow your deen
He told me not to contact him anymore and he has meant it. Haven't heard from him since. (It's been over a year). I want to talk to him and tried to, and the no contact rule has no impact. I think I have lost him for good.
Have you tried the pattern interrupt texts that I suggested in my videos?
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You almost look like my ex boyfriend. But unfortunately I lost him and he's not coming back😢
the minute he ended it... he's gone for good.. why fight for something that is not wanted anymore? move on .. easier said than done.. but that's the truth. my ex ended our 4 year relationship just like that... like it was nothing. i blocked him right away.. no argument..BLOCKED!
same with me. we ended our almost 5yrs relationship and now it's more than 2 months since we last talk. So far Im doing great with no contact because usually I am the one who always initiates the conversation after the no contact. But this time, it's for good and I realize my worth.
Thanks to my friends who were there for me.
@@joebagotsay9738 cheers hun.. we are better than that. we deserve better♥️
@@jassicahenry9084 lol i dont want him back
He loves you an you love him
You need to unblock him an love him again
Hey coach, actually my ex is asking me to be his friend if I'm willing. But he is okay to let me go too. He initially said that he needed time because, he wanted me to know more about me. But, I have become too attached to him and made him feel more wanted and loved him more. So he says I'm being dramatic and he needs no relationship with me. But I want him back. I cannot go into entire no contact because he is my mentor too. What should I do in this situation?
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@@ukokobiliclifford7515 my boyfriend is cheating on me,an were almost break up
My ex broke up with me a month ago, just before we should get married and prepared all documents.. Didn't even have courage to say into my face, was ignoring me and I left.. Was a very bad way.. I was so hurt.. Than he texted me for days by telling me I don't give him enough attention and stupid things.. We were together for almost 2 years.. Was saying bad words to me for days, very angry, after 3days wanted to meet us to talk in personal, but.. Didn't show up.. Then said wants to kerp in touch, sometimes sends me like he miss me, ask for my photos as I reject by telling him we are broken up.. He was angry and now he s silent.. Not a word.. I still have feelings.. Its very hard.. Don't really know the reason, cause what he said its not the real reason, its stupid.. I'm so confused.. 😔
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Lmao this is tru my ex reach out to me today an I didnt take him back. I didn't even know about this viedo
When a person breaks up with you don't pay them no mine an keep enjoying life an have appreciate time With your friends and family. Normally when they come bk it's because they can't replace you. They left you because they thought they had someone better.. smh why take back someone who left you for someone better . Smh I kindly let him know he was replaced . An let him know why I ain't taking him back. Guys dont take your ex back
They will loose respect for u they know they only see you as a sec option if nothing works out then I go back to them option.
Nothing good comes out of taking an ex back
The longer your don't interact with your ex
The more that Ex gone respect you and change there perception of you .
It's best never to take them bk
Just like a drug addicted smoking after treatment. Is just like an ex coming bk.
They gone relapse and do it again
I don't want him back. I just want to move on completely. 😏
Hey Aura, that's great for you! Keep your happiness in focus and how to be th ebest version of yourself.
That's what's up !!!!!
@@chrisseitercoaching thanks Mr. Seiter. I just don't like men who love porn and he is so disrespectful, that's why I don't want him anymore ✌️
How do you handle this when you work with them? Its been 4 days since he broke up with me, and I’ve been off since. (Vacation) I go back in two days and went completely silent after. What do I do if he tries to approach me? I’m afraid I’ll rip his head off! lol
Hey Sarah, when you work with someone you need to follow a limited no contact, where you do not reach out to them outside of work and do not make an effort to speak with them while in work. Only when you need to.
Chris Seiter thanks so much for responding!
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My ex left me for no reason and started dating a married woman.Am heart broken. I don’t know how to deal with this situation because i still love ❤️ him.
So sorry to hear this, very painful...... it’s his loss😀You deserve someone much better..... hard to hear but just give it time🥰Good luck to yiu😘
Wow, what an ass, but hey everyone has a right to do what they must to be happy, even your ex, and especially you.
Who plays to be missed, is risking to be forgotten.
What if both of us using this method??
Most definitely with kids correct
How do you do this listen and observe if it is a LDR? He has moved in with someone new closer to him in distance. He still says we are tight and he is a little loose. He still wants to message, I have stopped talking as of this past Friday after a day of emails.
Hi Kathy, when someone is in a new relationship you should be doing a 45 day NC and then following the being there method. Even if he still want stop talk you need to ignore him for 45 days solid. To let him feel the loss of you
After I got angry and broke the NC rule and messaged him told him congratulations and I was letting him go on with his new life and his response was don't sweat the crap and for me to quit being so cold. That really did it for me with how he wouldn't take responsibility for what he had done to me. He continues to send messages but I don't even care at this point. Complete 45 day NC began
What do you do then when they finally come back to you after you leave silence treatment? How easily do you take em back?
How was your relationship after he got back?
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Hi,I need help
😂imagine if your ex reads your comment
I am losing my mind we broke up a week ago I broke it off after not taking to him for days because he wasn't giving me enough attention... he has blocked me for week which is very unusual and when I called him 3 days ago he was very mad and said he wanted nothing to do with me... I am frustrated I miss him so much and this is not normal for us, we are very close
Hey there, so it could be a number of things but he sounds angry with you for ending the relationship. However your reason for ending the relationship is still going to be valid if he does not see any wrong doing on his part. So even if you were to get back together he may not have changed, so you would have to settle for less than you want in a relationship. If you want him back then you would need to complete a 30 day NC and then reach out with a text that I suggest, which is about getting him open to talking to you, not about getting him back and then you work your way up the value ladder.
@@chrisseitercoaching I went silent for 2 weeks and recently reached out using text and he responded saying that I he hates it when I break up with him.... however I made it clear that I'm not ok with what he did and that and that I hate the tension between us and that if he wont change I am willing with being friends ... I will start the 30 day right away cos I am I detached.
I failed at the no contact rule
Thanku Chris. I m already silent.
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I need help please coach. I started to talk to my ex boyfriend 8 months ago. We met through a dating site. He has a child. He was never in a relationship with the mother of the child. He works with this lady at the same place. Before me he used to stay at the daughter’s mother every weekend. When we started dating he stopped staying at the mothers house, but will pick up the daughter (4 years old) and go to his parents house. He had a house on his own. I had met the daughter once and the parents two times in 8 months while he comes to my house and is around my daughter and mother who loves with me. I had never met his friends. He supposedly was going to introduced me to everyone but because of Covid it didn’t happen. I had asked why he never take me with him to pick up the daughter and go to his parents. He doesn’t include me in holidays or in his daughters life. Last week I was going to surprise him going to his house but when I asked what he was going to do he said he was going to his friends house and the stay over night there. I got mad and started saying that I was planning to go to his house if he could cancel that with his friends and spend time with me since we don’t really see each other that much. He said no. And after fighting we said that we were done. I cried and plead for him to not break up with me. Same thing the next day. The following day we talked but I was very sad and crying that I don’t really remember talking about some decisions because on the next night while we’re talking on the phone I asked him what was going on and where were we standing? He said: “I don’t know”, I said well I would like to know and he said: well, we said that we are going to take one day at the time and you being pushy right now again. I don’t remember saying that. I wanted him to say that he loved me and wants to work things out with me. So, we talked again on the next day but I noticed him being distant and dry with me. He will not call me baby or honey like he used to. So I decided to send him a text early in the morning saying this:
Good morning. It seems that you are talking to me like I’m your friend. I’m not your friend.
The other night you said that you taking one day at a time and need to think? I need to do that also. when you figure out what you want to do call me, until then do not contact me. Have a good day. He hasn’t responded to me for three days and I’m so sad right now. I just wanted to take my value back and make him realize that he loves me. What do you think about this? Do you think that he would come back to me or I will just forget about him? Or was I too harsh with him? I’m trying very hard to do the cero contact but scared that will no work with him. I love him but I also don’t want this relationship happening like this. We are in the very late 30’s so I don’t know why he is not answering or even said ok we talk when another time. Please help.
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What if he initiated no contact for an indefinite period to give us the chance to "heal" and "move on"...? :( He cried a lot as well when he broke up...saying how much he was going to miss me...what do you think are the chances of getting back together?
Niemand same here. I did the no contact rule and nothing. I think I have lost him. I guess he’s happy in his new relationship.
Hi Niemand, so when you go into a No Contact and it goes over 66 days your ex starts the process of getting out of the habit of talking to you and thinking about you. So if it has been along time then you are going to have to reconnect to get your ex back where you treat it as if you are getting to know a new person, you will not be able to pick up where you left off.
Hi i just broke up with my bf.i beg him to stay but he still want to broke up.he says he loves me but he cant just with me .its make me so stressful .he loves me but he wont me 😭
I'm sorry to hear Ayu, be sure that you work on yourself during your No Contact so that you are best version of yourself when you start reaching out to your ex
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my ex and i have never broken up for real in the span of 3 years. but due to this pandemic, we couldnt see each other and the frustration just gets in the way of our relationship. we fought a lot recently thru texts. he says he loves me a week ago but we had a fight and he suddenly got tired and told me to stop. he said the relationship is toxic now and he wants us to move on. this is so sudden to me because i know we aren't like this usually. will he come back? i'm implementing no contact rule now. we fight as a normal couple before but now it got frequent but for me it was still manageable. he said he won't see anyone else after the breakup.
your ex is toxic
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My ex just broke up with me after 3 years. His reasoning was that he wasnt strong enough to be in a relationship with me and that he needed to work on himself... I miss him, I want him back. He was my everything.. but I'm scared he won't come back...
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Do not ignore your ex if THEY reach out listen to coach lee and coach Craig Kenneth, if you want them back why would you ignore them, there just gona then move on thinking you don't want them
he broke up with me with no reason,he just say its over😭and i dont know what im going to do,i cant eat,i cant sleep ,,i dont know what to do😔and he say he not love me anymore😔
Hey Batham, the most important thing you do right now is take care of yourself! Work on your Holy Trinity, where you focus on your health and feeling better. Work on yourself and show him how he does not control your happiness. When you have completed your 45 days No Contact you can start reaching our with texts that I have suggested in my videos if you want to get him back
@@chrisseitercoaching thankyou so much,,it really helps for me,its 2days i will not contact him,,but yesterday he will chat me and he was verry angry to me i will not response all his msg but still hurt for me😔
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My boyfriend and I broke up about two weeks ago , and I started no contact the day after I gave him his stuff back . He has messaged me three times , things like "I hope you don't have bad feelings towards me , I still care about you a lot" and I have not answered any of them. Today I found that be blocked me on social media. Is he acting out because I've been avoiding him ?
Yes he is just upset that you did not reply to his messages. You will be unblocked before you know it
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We just broke up. We have an 8 years relationship. All what you've said in this video's true. Im so depress right now but thanks to your videos, it helps me feel a little better now.
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Coach Chris u mentioned no contact even if the ex reaches out until the no contact rule is over. When is the no contact rule over?
The average person does 30 days, we say to do 45 if you had a bad bad break up of begging and pleading for a few days. Or if your ex meets someone new then extend your NC to 45 days
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@@chrisseitercoaching what could possible reason why suddenly he blocked me with just a little misunderstanding. In our case he is the one who have a bigger love. He always say that. Im in a great pain now. Pls help
I had a emotional affair with a girl online that I never met ex got mad moved out of state changed her number blocked my email and facebook will this still work I mean I'm up against some incredible odds
Brian Stoops sadly she’s probably not coming back. She probably feels she wasn’t good enough and she never will be. With all the blocking she’s gone, you should move on too.
@@PeaceDayCortez thanks for the advice but I'm not ready to give up just yet
If she was the one, why would you hurt her like that? Emotional affairs are even worse to a woman than random sex. Sorry but it will take a lot to get her back if ever. Seems like she’s got a good head on her shoulders. It’s not to bash you. I apologize. It had happened to me and I never wanted even look at him. And he was my husband.
@@Lovepinkdress people make mistakes and people change thanks for your attack on me
Brian Stoops Brian, I was not attacking you. Sorry. I was just stating my opinion. I'm prop too harsh but I just belive that if you really like someone you wudlnt put yourself in a position to lose that person.
I broke up with my ex, then begged and pleaded for him to come back on the same day, the last time I texted them was 5 days ago asking for my things back but he ignored me. I’m in no contact now ... but will this work on my ex ?
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He broke up with me 3 weeks ago and 2 weeks ago said we should stop all contact. I said if that’s what he wants then that’s fine with me. He texted me later that day saying his mums tests care back ok. I didn’t reply because he asked to stop contact. I’ve now not heard from him in 2 weeks. I think he’s completely gone.
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