"Respect is so important to men" ACTUALLY it's important to every human being on the planet! Women deserve and should expect respect just as much as men.
TLDR: it's a socialization issue. Everyone needs external validation, but men get it significantly less often than women currently. (Note, this is me just taking about cis people, as being trans will change up these observations a lot.) I think the difference many people don't notice is that it's much easier for women to get outside validation from friends, while guys are currently socialized to think that it's "gay" for men to hype each other up. Not just is that homophobic, it's also incredibly damaging. Women friends are expected to give each other validation and platonic affection (physical and emotional) while men tend to think they can only receive it from their romantic partner. This is difficult for men who have a hard time finding a partner and unfair for any partners they are with. This is thankfully getting better in more recent years, but not fast enough for many men who need it. Oh, and fun(?) fact for those that think this is inherent, this used to be switched. Men used to be considered the emotional ones while women were supposed to be stoic. It's why a lot of old stories have men crying a lot and women either being reserved or if they got emotional it being a sign they're unwell.
@@normalgamergalthe thing is… the type of “respect” that is preached for females to give males in conservative complimentarian communities (which Melina is already part of) is not “I see you as an equal human worthy of validation” but “I must defer to you in everything.” The people speaking out against the rhetoric that “men need respect” are dealing with the “love and respect” false dichotomy popularized in evangelicalism: that women uniquely need love and men uniquely need respect. They would wholly agree with your statements that men need healthy peer validation, because we’re dealing with two different definitions of respect. (Aside: glad someone else has brought up that historically-particularly before the Enlightenment-men were perceived as the emotional ones. 😁)
@@normalgamergal I agree with you to an extent but I guess I just don’t consider validation and affection to be the same as respect. To say that, nowadays, men actually need respect more than women is to imply that women are now more highly respected in this world than men and that’s just not true.
@@flowerchild29831 I didn't disagree with your statement at all, just giving context to why guys may currently feel more needy with those things. Saying that, affection may not be part of respect, but I personally feel affirmation is. If you're talking more about autonomy, obviously both need it equally, though women are the ones facing having our rights taken away more than men right now, as I'm sure you know. Sorry if you got the wrong impression, I was attempting to expand on what you said, not disagree with it.
@@normalgamergal they're still paid more than women, get better jobs, are more resoected in the workplace and co-ed environments so that respect from OTHER WOMEN WHO SEE THE UNPAID LABOR their friend is doing means very little. Women only receive praise from other women who are their friends. Men receive praise from everyone, in every world. Doing the bare minimum.
Highlighting the battle of flesh and spirit within us. It’s freeing when we are living in the Spirit, but difficult at the same time because we are dying to our flesh and old self.
First of all, if you're in an abusive relationship you should leave, don't put up with that. Now with that out of the way, here's the most godly way to submit to a covertly abusive situation
Her disclaimer in the beginning means nothing when you think of the complexities of emotional and psychological abuse. If she believes that submission to the husband MUST happen, this idea can be twisted in ways that one may not see as abusive. The submission things is inherently a recipe for disaster when you consider coercive control and emotional abuse. Ephesians 5:22 can be used to justify emotional neglect ("I don't want to hear anymore about how you feel about..." for example), gaslighting (when submission is justified as "biblical," gaslighting is obviously going o occur), judgemental attitudes ("that outfit is immodest, I want you to change" is a possibility). I hate the idea of submission, period. It's not healthy and inherently abusive.
I CAN NOT emphasize/agree with this more. I got into a terrible marriage and my way of coping was hiding within these ideas of submissiveness. My ex was psychologically/mentally/emotionally abusive long before he was ever physically. I was the ideal biblical wife to my ex husband and that was his narcissistic dream. This video was extremely triggering ha.
I don't like the idea of submission either because when people talk about it, it's always on the woman to submit to her husband, they never say how the man should submit to her as well. It's never in a positive healthy way. Like no...this is a partnership. Not a master/servant thing. Both should submit to each other, you serve each other, you listen to each other, you respect each other, you take each other's opinions and feedback into account.
"..Or my daddy" and we all cringe and laugh. This whole video is icky. If you have to white knuckle everything all the time, maybe it's not something you need to be doing. Her sugary sweet monologue sounds like it's covering bitterness. Just my take. 😢
As an ex-fundie, I find these reaction videos on submission cathartic. For me personally, I think her view is rigid and restricting and the practical tips are more how to treat anyone you are in a relationship with.... nobody likes a backseat driver. I was actually wondering if her husband is a backseat driver and if she'd put up with it if he was. Her view also helps me realize how harmful those teachings were to me years ago and how much, imo, they reinforced and showed me how to, unknowingly, view myself as an object in so many nuanced and detailed ways. What a mind fuck truly it was for me and I'm still purging those mindsets!
Re: Milena messing up words- I think her native language is Portuguese and her parents are not native English speakers so she is bilingual. I think she sometimes gets English words and phrases confused or slightly off because it’s not her family of origin’s primary language. It’s been pretty consistent over time, not new.
My ex's parents had (past tense because he passed away) this dynamic in their marriage, where dad made all the decisions and rules. The way they executed it though was...odd. They wouldn't argue in front of the children at all. Like literally at all. So whenever she wanted to voice an opinion contrary to his, they would go hide in their bedroom, muffle the sound by cramming a blanket or something in the bottom door gap, and whisper argue. He (my ex) said multiple times they as kids would try and eavesdrop on their arguments, couldn't hear a thing. He said it was a very strange process getting to adulthood and realizing he had virtually no conflict resolution skills because his parents kept them all so hush hush, and they'd emerge doing whatever Dad said anyway. And whenever the siblings fought it just resulted in at least one of them being abused. Obviously it's not the most harmful way a submissive marriage can potentially affect someone, but it's a possibility.
I feel him. My parents were not religious and none was more submissive, but they never argued or disagree in front of me. I'm an only child so they never helped me process a conflict with a sibling or anything like that. It was very hard growing up and I had to work on that all alone while I was also trying to control the raging hormones of the teenage years. It made my life way more difficult than if they would have talked from time to time about things they disagree about (whatever that is).
My win for the week was, after 1 year of sacrificing for a very long commute to work in a territory far from my home I was able to land a transfer to a territory closer to me! Everyone told me it would be a slim chance when I started but I got it! now I get to have more time back for myself to start working out again 😊
Just a heads up, the children in her first submission video are her own kids. I’ve been “following” her for years and those are definitely her kids, I don’t know why people would think they are not lol.
I do know that the one that had the face shown in that video isn’t hers. She did mention in either another video or an instagram story that she was babysitting for a friend that day. But yeah, all the other ones are hers.
Omg “Naturally I want to talk and I want to make my opinion known”. And the problem is what? If you aren’t then you are in an abusive relationship. She is brainwashed and abused
Unfortunately, I think this type of submissive woman is letting the enemy win rather than lose like she believes. Because these terms are so broad, because men are socialized to think less of women, and this thinking and behavior lets women think less of themselves as well, it isn’t what God wants but rather what the devil wants.
It is a 2-way street! “Do unto others as you would have done to you” is also in the freaking Bible. She’s infuriating. Women alone can’t do it all. Men alone can’t do it all… that’s why we have help, relationships, etc. marriage or not… humans need other humans. 🙄😒 Where’s the accountability for the men?!
Well you're not going to find it in a video talking about what women should do... Because it's not about what the men should be doing? Perhaps look up something like "how to be a biblical husband" etc.... just a tip.
She has many videos about how men should be acting in relationships with her husband. She says she does not have the authority to preach to men which is biblical.
I feel so bad that these women don’t think there can be harmony in a marriage without submission. I am a sahm of 2 girls, 2 and 6 months. We have a great relationship and partnership because we see each other as partners and friends first. And communication can not be underestimated. Also the number of times she talks about being mean to your husband. Never. I have never been mean to my husband. Why would I be married to someone that I would treat so poorly.
You know it is possible to ask your hubby for help in a respectful way. We both work. I like to cook, and he washes the pots and pans. When I have a tough day at work, I tell him and ask him and the teenagers to help get dinner together.
18:31 I don’t think she’s saying that he “gets” to act however he wants if his wife is not respecting him. I interpreted it as it would be his fleshly inclination to respond in an unkind way. But husbands are called to love their wives the way that Christ loved the church. A man teaching men about that passage would be saying the same thing as Milena-don’t do what your flesh wants to do-do what God calls you to do. If both people in a marriage are trying to be less selfish and more loving towards their spouse-that is more than likely going to make for a harmonious relationship.
How sad does one have to be to examine and review another womans life to bits just because you disagree and it doesnt align with your lifes view? This is just weird.
Yes this is so weird to me that people do this.. like this is really sad that she doesn’t add on wisdom or other things instead she puts other people down that’s weird
@@pri2x0x if she decides to no longer show her own children that is her right to do so. We don’t know who the other children are. Also, how do we know if she didn’t already ask the parents of those kids if it’s ok to show them online? I’m not keeping tabs on her so i don’t track her every move but people are worried too much about other people’s lives.
@pandalilili i think the answer youre scrambling desperately for is shes a hypocrite, concerned with the privacy of her own children but completely willing to exploit the privacy of others' children.
My win for the week is that I'm getting back into journaling. I stopped altogether when I went to university, but I'm back to loving writing again. A few things that irked me about Milena’s video: 1. Requiring the wife to submit to her husband was a punishment for Adam and Eve’s disobedience, not God’s perfect design for marriage. (In Genesis 2: 19, God said that Adam had dominion over everything he named, but he didn't name the woman Eve until after they disobeyed God in chapter 3: 20.) I believe that a true godly marriage (if you are so inclined) is one in which both spouses love, respect, and submit to *each other* and share familial/household responsibilities. 2. The term ‘die to self’ irks me because it's nowhere in the Bible. Christians are called to *deny* themselves, meaning that we should not give in to base selfishness, materialism, cruelty, and depravity, which are not characteristics of Christ. It doesn't mean that we allow ourselves to be dominated without responding/defending ourselves out of a misguided sense of duty. I feel compassion for the women who were taught this because they don't know any other way and changing is difficult. However, the teaching that this is supposed to be the standard for everyone when it has only stifled the God-given inquisitiveness, leadership ability, and ambitions of so many Christian women breaks my heart. I appreciate your take on this topic because your responses are pragmatic, nuanced, logical, and compassionate. Great video as always!
Good lord! When I watched Milena back in the day I would have NEVER thought this would be her. Giiirrrrrllll the way I was bothered the whole time. Like girl you have rights sister! Being oppressed/subservient to man is NOT SUBMISSION. Girl I’m not a punching bag you gotta find somebody else to do that.
I love how she reads in 1 Peter 3, where it says wives can love their husbands through their actions, NOT through "outward adornments, braided hair and gold jewelry" and then one minute she tells us that we need to do our hair and makeup so husband can come home to "a hot wife that he loves" 🤮 MY husband loves me regardless of what I look like. He, like God, considers my heart above all else. Seems like my husband is probably more godly than Milena's 👀🤔
It says, "Do not let your adornment be MERELY outward..." merely means "just only." So don't only let your adornment be outwards, but also inwards. Matthew 7 also says not to judge others, or you too will be judged.
She is spending entirely too much time washing that tiny fry pan. I can not imagine spending 20 minutes on a tiny pan while my perfectly curled hair is down and my golden bracelets hit my wrists.
I saw another comment that mentioned this, but when she speaks on what women do and how women treat their husbands (according to her), her words just drip with scorn. It sounds like she resents other women to me - which isn't an uncommon narrative in fundamentalist culture. Normally it angers me, but for some reason in her case, it makes me sad to hear. I can't imagine how she's been treated or what she's been told to make her view herself and other women so harshly.
My win for the week is that I got hired on for a permanent position! Her warning about the abuse makes me sad. Not because it’s a bad thing to decide you aren’t going to put up with abuse, but because she goes on to perpetuate elements of psychological and emotional abuse and say THAT is okay to put up with. I don’t actually hear her say that the wife deserves respect as well. Both elements in a relationship are worthy of respect, not just the husband. And the whole making herself presentable for her husband…Girl, you should make yourself presentable BECAUSE IT MAKES YOU FEEL GOOD. There are so many times when I was starting to hop back on the Depresso Expresso that a shower and a presentable outfit helped me to not punch that ticket. But you should also be able to give yourself the grace to admit that you aren’t feeling it and your husband should love and respect you enough to be okay with you not feeling it.
Milena: “All we have to do on judgment day is account for whether or not we submitted to our husbands.” Tell me, how’d that go for Sapphira? On the flip side of that coin, how do you think it’s going for Zipporah, or Abigail? Did Deborah not teach men? Were all her prophecies and judgments in submission to her husband first? “Well those were in Old Testament times.” Great! So you’re saying God changes, then?…
Yes! I’ve been in the fundie spaces for years and always bring these up and they hate these. I’ve also heard about sapphira that “she should have chosen a better man” 😢
@@granolamomie oh good grief. Because women had ^so much choice^ in their spouses in that time and culture … 🙄. Do you ever wonder what these people are on?
I am a God-fearing, Christ following wife and mother. I’ve followed Milena for a couple of years now (btw lover her). I’ve also seen her spiritual shift in her weekly videos, as you pointed out at the beginning. Even though I am a fan of her, her family and her content, Lately I find myself disagreeing quite a bit with her specifically with the way she describes Christianity and how drastic she portrays some things. She has the best intentions. It just comes off a bit extreme. Specially to women who may be more naïve when it comes to the word of God. But hey, if this is the lifestyle she’s happy with kudos to her. I just think she should put a bit more context When it comes to these types of videos. She should make it important to also point out that this is what she does in her marriage and spiritual journey. Not everyone’s walk with Christ looks the same. The important thing here is that we all have the same destination.
Im not married whatsoever but I pray for a healthy relationship and Im praying for marriages that reflect what marriage should be in a wrong light. I view marriage as a partnership, and though I believe men and women have different roles in life, you can still come together and have a partnership built off the foundation of Christ and learn and grow together. I am learning what true respect and healthy relationships can look like, and though it is nice seeing someone talk about this stuff, it saddens (and frustrates) me when others don't see it.
I can’t. I am an equal. I pull more money, I raise the kids, I take care of the house. He’s lucky af, as so am I 😂 I can’t compute this concept in my brain. I’ll never be less then
I am genuinely curious as a non-religious bystander, how biblically submissive women handled the death of a spouse? If they have deferred to him in all things for decades, how then do they cope with having to be the sudden decision maker? This doesn't seem like a healthy way for an adult woman to behave, she mashes it sound almost like being in a perpetual state of childhood. I honestly don't get it.
It's not biblical. It's how sad men twist certain Bible verses to control women. The Bible calls for women to be involved in the greater economy outside of the home and are absolutely able to question and defy their husbands if they stray from virtue.
The end there “all the 🚩 “ made my heart sad . It feels like she I s headed towards legalism. I don’t know anything about her but I don’t want that for anyone.
That was horrific ha. I wonder about her bizarre assumptions (ie. woman naturally are controlling & nagging etc.) and examples (her talking her husbands ear off). I was in an abusive relationship for about 10 years where I coped by diving deep into the trad wife lifestyle and honestly now that I’ve been in therapy for 3 years and I’ve had an opportunity to reflect on that time in my life I’m kind of just left speechless by that video. I can’t believe I lived that lifestyle for as long as I did. Now that I’m in a healthy relationship I realize how easy it is to not nag or control when I have a kind and caring partner ha. Like I don’t need to tame my tongue because we have mutual love and respect for each other. Relationships are NOT supposed to be that kind of hard. My heart aches for her.
Yeah, I also felt like she was telling on herself... It's okay to have issues, you just need to adress the issues at the root, not to struggle throught something else, in my honest opinion.
I feel that you are asking valid questions but most of this video was nitpicking every she says, wears, how she speaks. I watched this same video and understood the message she was trying to convey, nothing was confusing or offensive. It threw me a bit off guard when you went as far as saying that she “borrowed” someone else’s kids for a video? A very odd assumption.
I believe you are being overly judgmental. You don’t need to have the same viewpoints or perspectives but I picked up from your commentary and reactions that you are knit-picking points she is making..
48:07 One of the less talked about signs of an abusive relationship is when a partner drives recklessly and does not take your safety or comfort into account. Regardless of what your relationship is with a person, whether it's a friend or family member or romantic partner, you should be able to provide feedback if you are concerned about their driving. Your life is in their hands. If you tell them something they're doing makes you uncomfortable or unsafe, they should be able to respect that and make changes to make sure you feel safe. If they get angry with you for wanting to feel safe, that's concerning. Now, there's obviously good and not so great ways to provide this feedback, so we should be mindful of how we're giving feedback, but we should be allowed to give this feedback.
You might touch on it later but haven’t as I’m listening (had to come to the RUclips video to comment as I was listening on Spotify 😂) but I am shocked and appalled and confused at the idea that women don’t understand the need to feel respected? Like what? That’s universal. You should absolutely feel that and expect your partner to respect you. So many positives build off of that. And so many negatives build off of not having respect, many veering into abusive behaviors.
Literally. It was from a book “love and respect” that has been pushed around in fundie spaces a lot. This idea that women can be disrespected even horribly so but need love. Like how can you love someone you don’t respect!?
@@granolamomie You hit the nail on the head. I always say that it’s impossible to love someone without respecting them. It’s possible to feel affection, desire, fondness, and/or appreciation for a person without respecting them. But love? No.
From context (and deductive reasoning), it’s likely that the “nagging” is actually reasonable requests for her husband to complete the tasks necessary to take care of his children and his home. And those reasonable requests are likely made in a state of frustration and/or exasperation because it’s reasonable to expect an adult to do what’s necessary without prompting instead of them refraining from childcare and housework unless being actively managed by their spouse. Often, men/fathers will claim that they “help” with childcare or housework when their wives directly request their “help.” Meaning, that their wives are not only doing most of the housework and childcare (as well as likely having a separate job) but these men/fathers give their wives _another_ job which is to manage their husbands-an adult who, according to evangelical Christians, is the leader and head of household. Weird.
Those children that shows in her videos ARE HERS. I don’t know who it was telling they’re not but yes they are. For some reason she chose not to show her kids faces anymore. She said that sometimes kids will show on her videos but she won’t show their faces anymore.
I have a question though… she talked about how we should do it their way even though it’s not our prefered way… but my logic is that we are the helper of our husband so if something seems easier done a certain way why would i keep it from him instead of respectfully and softly telling him the maybe easier way? Hope someone can answer and understands my question
The difference between you and her is that she speaks from the understanding that the holy spirit has given her. You only speak of what you think and what you think is correct based on your life experiences. We need to let go of what we think and what we are accustomed to and start asking the holy spirit for understanding and true transformation. God bless you.
Exactly we are still in the hands of the potter and we are being transformed as seemed best to him. We have no say in what we think is right or wrong. I love the book of Job when God confronts Job and tells him all God is in control of this helped open my eyes and now I find it funny how we mere humans like to fight with the maker thinking we know best. I pray for all who read this that God may have mercy on us and give us understanding and true wisdom to fully understand his word.@@Velenty.Mauricia
Ok then how come no one can seem to agree about what the holy spirit actually says? How come the bible constantly contradicts itself in what it tells people to do and be? It's easy to THINK you're understanding something, it's a lot harder to be honest with the fact that you don't actually know.
@@StonedHunter It's not contradicting at all. It says the same thing over and over. That is confirmation from the Lord. The Bible was written over a time laps of 1500 years with over 40 authors and they all agree with each other. You can read the prophets like Isaiah and then read the New Testament and see how it's all the same. Never once does the Bible contradict itself because it was inspired by God and he is perfect and divine. I encourage you to do a short prayer before you read the bible (don't judge until you've read all of it). Say Lord please help me understand your word, and have it be like the seed that is planted in good soil, and help it bear good fruit at its time. - Hope this helps, Good bless you!
I watched this on my lunch break and I was HEATED. I support women. But I don’t support being made to feel less than because I don’t subscribe to an interpretation of Bible. First of all I believe the mainstream interpretation of submission is wrong. But I’m not gonna go for blows over that. I just won’t be buying into it. Cause I’ve lived my life in a box I’m not doing with that someone I’m gonna spend the rest of my life with. I like to be joyful and not being who God created me to be is subjecting my life to hell. And that’s not where I’m going so I won’t be doing none of this foolishness
Being pure is so important it’s on her list twice so naturally she talks about it the least, gives 0 practical examples, and orders you to do the work she promised she has educated herself on enough to make this video about it…
How is a gentle spirit equated to gentle guarded words? These are two different things someone can have gentle, guarded words, and have very non gentle spirit, I believe.
32:10 see this is one of the things that frustrates me. I work from home and my husband works out of the home. And he believes that I should do all the home things since I work from home. But we’ve worked on it and have divided the chores in the home. We both contribute to our household financially. And we both live here as well. Not all women are SAHM.
Win for the week: uni classes started again this week and I just had a really long day, but now I'm settling down for dinner ready to watch a new B Haney video!
She has a history of postpartum depression and she expresses that she has struggled with selfishness and submission and gentleness and taming the tongue. And her husband has a history of getting distracted and taking forget to get from point a to point b. Or staying longer just because. He has expressed he has a struggle with time management (time blindness). And this has been a struggle in their marriage in the past.
Just constructive criticism: when reacting to videos, remember that the way you are understanding it may not be what she is trying to say, for example when she says in the beginning about saying what you feel, it could be about saying something that is not constructive or just that you feel very negative and whatever you are going to say will just hurt, then it’s better not to say it ( that goes for everyone ) Or the part that the man needs respect or he doesn’t feel like protecting you, we can all feel a certain kind of way but the fact that we still have to love and protect our wives doesn’t change, she’s didn’t say that he will stop loving and protecting you but maybe he won’t feel like it just like sometimes we don’t feel like doing what we’re suppose to, but we always try. Just try to be a bit more positive with what she is saying and understand that the way you are seeing it might not be exactly what she is trying to say. Between Christian women everything should be encouragement and/or correction with love.
I don’t believe she’s saying her husband is free to live in sin. Her point is that even though our husbands aren’t perfect, we are still to be submissive. She’s highlighting character flaws and then giving actionable things we can do to still love and submit to them. She’s not giving husbands a free card.
@@Raya-ir4tm absolutely! I do believe there are some like that as well and I it’s sad that some husbands are like that. But what I believe Milena is trying to point out is that the power isn’t within us. Our job isn’t to convict, that’s the Lord’s job. God has the power to power to convict and correct. And yes, your husband will hurt you the same way you will hurt your husband sometimes (emotionally) because we are sinful, fallen, imperfect people. Milena is encouraging us to direct the focus onto ourselves because we can only control ourselves, no one else. And she’s encouraging us to hand over the things out of control to the One who does have control-God.
So this is a great example of why people who don’t know how to do exegesis should not be teaching anybody. Also why if you aren’t using a concordance , you should not be teaching anyone. The word helper in this context is actually the word ezer. This word is used very few times, and is reduced to refer two people-woman and God. Her belief of how the word helper is used also indicate that she believes that God should bow down to man. Anyone who uses that verse as a way to indicate that women should submit to God are literally being sacrilegious. They are also showing that they do not know they’re talking about, that they have a poor Education if any education or they were manipulating you in order to get what they want. Many biblical scholars agree that because of the use of that word specifically it completely changes the concept of what submit means in the Bible and submission of the wife to a husband would be more like a partnership. This understanding is also the basis of egalitarianism, now that concept of biblical egalitarianism is a manipulation designed to force two puzzle pieces (submission and the use of the word Ezer) together in a way that it doesn’t disturb the rest of the harmful worldview, but it’s still an example that in this video it is COMPLETELY misinterpreted.
“Are you treating your husband like the man you love most….or are you treating him like a stranger off the side of the road that you absolutely hate?” WHAT?!?!
Yes. You are absolutely right that is what she is saying in 18 mins. We are only accountable for what we do in this life. Our job is to fulfill the role God has for us, therefore we should do it regardless of how our husbands are fulfilling their role. Our husbands will be held accountable for what they do and don’t do.
@@Raya-ir4tmactually, biblically, your husband is expected to lead, love, provide protect and even give up his life for you (if it comes to that). Yes. I wouldn’t settle for anything less. That’s why it’s very important to only date seriously with the goal of marriage. All the examples we see in society have been distorted by sin. Make sure you look to the Bible for real answers not people, we are all faulty.
Familiarity breeds contempt and children. --Mark Twain That's what came to mind when you were speaking about familiarity. It's important in intimate relationships to make sure that just because one person is so familiar with the other other person that they disrespect, forget about, or take them for granted, or take advantage of them. For me, that is one way that familiarity can be bad/dangerous. However, thankfully this can be prevented if both/all parties in the relationship are taking steps to actively respect one another's boundaries.
I’ve watched and listened to Milena’s RUclips videos/podcast on and off for a few years and I always thought that 1. Nothing that her or her husband said ever really made sense, they would just constantly read bible verses with no explanation. And 2. She does struggle with her speech and has mentioned that in her podcast many times. I think that she means well, but this just shows you that some people should be the one teaching scripture and others should listen. So glad that you made this video because I thought I was the only one who thought this way about her!
Your confusion with dying to the flesh is a good indicator that you may not be as informed Very sure she shares her opinion with her husband, she always shares her opinion anyway (she has an entire RUclips etc) First start out with thinking you yourself aren’t your own, your God’s! So submitting is already something all Christians should be familiar with. Often times we get immediately defensive about submitting at all You seem like you have a negative mindset towards her before even listening, judgmental really. The comment section is just straight up gossip! I don’t think she’s saying that the men who aren’t being good husbands are off the hook and wives have to be perfect. But as a wife you should be focused on what you do for them not what they do for you since marriage is servitude. They should also be a great husband! There’s also something about not submitting when they are bringing you into sin. I just wanted to comment that seeing a woman wanting to dissect another woman’s video and tearing it down…it almost seems you may not really understand most of the concepts here and that might just mean more reading or praying for you if you’re curious about these topics There are many books on this, harder to understand this when you don’t have a man you truly want to lead you as he’s led by God (idk you, it’s the first video I’ve seen of you) Also seems you’re selective hearing - to control or manipulate (to control with skill) a situation- would make it turn out in your favor. There’s a lot about not living by your own will but living by Gods will tied into that. The thing you’re missing about women being at home is that they are mothers sometimes as well that should be at home. yes in 2024 both parents probably have to work in order to live. That’s not a great thing! Daycare is really expensive! It’s strange to have children and not raise them majority of the time. . you might as well not talk about submission at all if you aren’t clear on a number of other things first - assuming you aren’t from the video I would really say, if you didn’t like hearing most of this, it may not be something for you at this time! With my ears, I can relate! That is after agreeing with a lot of other things before submission at all! You may hear this with a new set of ears sometime in the future and it may make more sense. Someone else said it on here but English is her second language. Yes she mispronounces on her videos sometimes! I’m not sure why your approach is to create these reaction videos! If you can tell by the way I took you at face value, I’m sure I don’t have any context like who you are, if you’re not Christian at all, what your purpose is for these videos, etc. I just truly hope I don’t have another woman making videos about me behind my back. But I’ll say it’s more likely she will continue down this route as she has been convicted about a number of things personal to her (modesty, submission, etc) I didn’t realize this video was so long 😂 I didn’t know if I was going to get through all of it…. Took me all night with stopping and starting, also writing this! You spent some time and effort with this video and there were some additions you made that I liked!
hold up, i thought wives were to respect their husbands and husbands are to love their wives. if that's the case, then shouldn't those verses from 1 corinthians 13 be even more important and relevant for husbands??
Hi! I've been binge watching your content for the last two days and just subscribed. I'm so glad I found you and wanted to tell you that I have extreme amounts of religious trauma from the christian religion. I watch a lot of the reaction videos of the problematic channels you cover. Because it feels safe and validating when people review them and point out the toxic and hurtful aspects. The fact that you identify from a Christian perspective( Whatever that faith journey and definition is for you) and are so balanced, intellectual and respectful gives me a lot of hope. Thank you for creating a safe space and for being you. Oh! My win for the week is getting a one hour massage!
"You didn't merry Jesus. Don't hold him to such high standards. But do put him abouve yourself while you hold yourself to these ridiculously high standards." So why don't we get to hold the husband to higher standards if they're meant to be of higher standing and we're meant to look up to them for guidance. That seems like the only appropriate time to hold a person to a higher standard.
35:27 She says ask your husband what makes him feel respected and the gives having yourself put together as an example. Excuse me?! Someone making themselves look good for you can make you feel nice or appreciated even, but it shouldn't make anyone feel respected.
58:32 Also, saying "you are right" during an argument is the most unproductive thing I've ever heard! It doesn't solve the argument at all and it is definitely just being a doormat. It's disingenuous because usually in an argument you disagree on what the right thing is, that's why it's an argument.
Watching this stuff makes me so happy to be a Catholic raised atheist! Fundamentalists make Catholics look downright normal. I feel sorry for people raised like that!
35:59 yeah it’s fine to look best for your husband. But I will also say that husbands also need to nurture the relationship and not just put it on the wife to do it all.
She goes on to say that the enemy is “really threatened” by a submissive wife. Um, why? Wouldn’t that dynamic actually make it easier for “the enemy” to “attack” a marriage? “The enemy” would only have to lead the husband down the wrong path instead of the husband and wife who is allowed to be a vocal equal in leadership and decision-making within the family. Misogynistic crap never makes sense.
This makes me really sad, I used to really like watching Milena as a Christian wife myself because I used to believe she gave good advise but lately and now with these videos it all seems so twisted. This all seems manipulative and like it’s not coming from her heart, this seems to be coming from another source that doesn’t have her best interest at heart
From the outside in, it feels like she's taking a lot of opinions and ideas from Western church culture---the more fundamental stuff---and just running with it. To be fair, she's probably just regurgitating things she's heard and has been told is correct. We all do it, so I'm trying to extend some empathy for her.
My win for the week is that i only had to go stress cry once when we started using a completely new computer system across not just my hospital but our entire region! It was a six month prep process and a looooooot went into it but it went incredibly smoothly (at least in our area). I'm relatively new to your channel but I love how you have such a balanced take on everything.
I guess my question is whether these are things only women/wives should do but not men/husbands, or whether being respectful is mutual (i.e. the husband also shows respect to the wife in the way that the wife appreciates) and whether being quiet is mutual (or is it ok for the husband, when he is the passenger in the car, to be constantly giving advice and criticizing the wife's driving)? And I'm afraid that's really the only practical tips I heard from Milena: be respectful and be quiet. She also said pure, but didn't actually give any tips apart from "be a good homemaker" And I really worry when she says that even if the husband is hurtful (constantly? frequently?), the wife needs to just pray and put up with the hurt
I’ve watched Milena since 2019, quite some time… and I do feel that with her recent, and I would even say quite sudden, shift of personality at times she does sound “unsure” of what she is saying. Personally I feel like she is getting really defensive and always trying to “make a speech” about some hot topic, idk it’s not as genuine as it used to be… but I do appreciate her insight on some topics and I actually got more involved in Christianity after watching her content back then, idk sometimes it just feels like she is a different person. Idk if anyone who watches her can relate.
I think alot of what she is saying would be good if it wasn't gendered. Both men and women should be loved and respected. No one likes it if their partner is really critical, not just men. Everyone likes a homecooked meal at the end of the day, not just men. Rarr! This kind of paints her husband in a bad light tbh
Omg please don't tell me the family vloggers have decided that renting/borrowing children as RUclips props is the solution to protecting their own kids' privacy. This can't be real. Yeah, girl...I can't get past that part either.
I mean i can't believe some of the unhealthy relationship tips christian influencers put out for the public like not being allowed to have an opinion in your home lol B talks about toxic messages fundies like to spread about relationships.
She’s always spoken like this, I think it’s possibly a touch of dyslexia because it’s common for her to mix up words or say them in the wrong order or mispronounce them even when they’re simple.
My husband would fall out of love with me if I stopped telling him my opinion and calling him out in his shortcomings! I did that once and he was so offended because he says we have to be able to call each other out so that we can improve and be better sooo I don’t agree with what she says 🥴
I would like to mention how it’s very sad and absurd to me that she mentioned how wives lack “self control” when it comes not nagging the husband, yet these group of Christian influences preach so heavily against modesty because the men can’t control their lustful desires …😅wow okay!
They were her kids except for the one. And the mom of that child is a public figure and she doesn’t mind them being on the internet. I do understand the hold up tho, because I too was confused to why she showed her friend’s baby. But I did want you to know the facts☺️
Honestly, some of these tips have been very beneficial to my marriage 🤷 but i love the perspective I'm pretty sure English isn't her first language/she is bilingual. I know you said youre not trying to be rude about it, but i think you would absolutely call out i e. paul and morgan for pointing something like that out. Those are her kids except one i think. I dont actually think its that weird. As a photographer i will not share my own child, but many people do not care and sign the model release without a second thought. Win for the week: we found hardwood floors under our carpet!
Commenting as watching. I have been a milena watcher for a years and have noticed the shift in her content. I will say that in the first video only the child that has its face shown is not hers, the ones running around are hers. Still doesn’t make any sense why to show her friends when she doesn’t show hers but I thought I’d point that out.
Now on the part of her stumbling on her words. I’ve been watching her for four plus years and as far as I remember she always has stumbled over her words. Kind of in a way where it’s like she is just talking as a stream of consciousness and not planned out
Next part with the traffic, on I think one of their most recent podcasts, they did speak about one of their most recent fights and it was because her husband got home late. I can’t remember if it was due to traffic or just work but yes, I’d say that it is something that she gets upset about.
I also want to add that I did notice this shift slowly starting after her yearly break from RUclips that she takes but the DRAMATIC shift really started after she had her miscarriage. She even mentioned that in one of their most recent podcast episodes. And it makes me incredibly sad to think that maybe she believes that she upset God and had somehow caused that to happen to her and that is why she has had such a dramatic shift.
Serious question - How is it biblical to make videos of you watching other people’s videos and tearing them apart? This is really nit picky and sad. Aren’t we supposed to be lifting one another up, not being judgmental?
I just wanted to say; the kids in the first part are definitely hers. It's one thing to do a reaction video towards one of her videos but please don't spread lies about her. Those are her kids. If you are not completely sure then just don't say anything at all. She can come across as a bit extreme but let's remember were all sisters in christ and submission for her might look a bit different than for someone else. Submission is biblical if used in a healthy and loving relationship, of course. And submission doesn't mean that you don't have a say or a part in making decisions for your family. If you don't like her then don't watch her videos.
I’ve been scrolling to find this comment!!! Yess like do you not have a life? I’m sure Mi is a good servant and obedient to the lord I don’t understand why people think it’s okay to bash on others
"Respect is so important to men" ACTUALLY it's important to every human being on the planet! Women deserve and should expect respect just as much as men.
TLDR: it's a socialization issue. Everyone needs external validation, but men get it significantly less often than women currently.
(Note, this is me just taking about cis people, as being trans will change up these observations a lot.)
I think the difference many people don't notice is that it's much easier for women to get outside validation from friends, while guys are currently socialized to think that it's "gay" for men to hype each other up. Not just is that homophobic, it's also incredibly damaging. Women friends are expected to give each other validation and platonic affection (physical and emotional) while men tend to think they can only receive it from their romantic partner. This is difficult for men who have a hard time finding a partner and unfair for any partners they are with. This is thankfully getting better in more recent years, but not fast enough for many men who need it.
Oh, and fun(?) fact for those that think this is inherent, this used to be switched. Men used to be considered the emotional ones while women were supposed to be stoic. It's why a lot of old stories have men crying a lot and women either being reserved or if they got emotional it being a sign they're unwell.
@@normalgamergalthe thing is… the type of “respect” that is preached for females to give males in conservative complimentarian communities (which Melina is already part of) is not “I see you as an equal human worthy of validation” but “I must defer to you in everything.”
The people speaking out against the rhetoric that “men need respect” are dealing with the “love and respect” false dichotomy popularized in evangelicalism: that women uniquely need love and men uniquely need respect. They would wholly agree with your statements that men need healthy peer validation, because we’re dealing with two different definitions of respect.
(Aside: glad someone else has brought up that historically-particularly before the Enlightenment-men were perceived as the emotional ones. 😁)
@@normalgamergal I agree with you to an extent but I guess I just don’t consider validation and affection to be the same as respect. To say that, nowadays, men actually need respect more than women is to imply that women are now more highly respected in this world than men and that’s just not true.
@@flowerchild29831 I didn't disagree with your statement at all, just giving context to why guys may currently feel more needy with those things. Saying that, affection may not be part of respect, but I personally feel affirmation is. If you're talking more about autonomy, obviously both need it equally, though women are the ones facing having our rights taken away more than men right now, as I'm sure you know. Sorry if you got the wrong impression, I was attempting to expand on what you said, not disagree with it.
@@normalgamergal they're still paid more than women, get better jobs, are more resoected in the workplace and co-ed environments so that respect from OTHER WOMEN WHO SEE THE UNPAID LABOR their friend is doing means very little.
Women only receive praise from other women who are their friends. Men receive praise from everyone, in every world. Doing the bare minimum.
"Submission is so freeing."
"Submission is torturously difficult for me every single day."
Okay, then.
All I heard was bondage. I said mmmmm can’t be from the Bible. I said I’ve been set free thank you.
Something can be freeing but also be difficult... 🤯
Highlighting the battle of flesh and spirit within us. It’s freeing when we are living in the Spirit, but difficult at the same time because we are dying to our flesh and old self.
Hard doesn’t mean bad
First of all, if you're in an abusive relationship you should leave, don't put up with that. Now with that out of the way, here's the most godly way to submit to a covertly abusive situation
Scary and true. ❤
Are you saying Milena is in an abusive relationship?
@@Frugalista77i have felt that before!
😂 you got it!
@@186itaalia there’s literally tons of people who feel the same. Look it up.
Her disclaimer in the beginning means nothing when you think of the complexities of emotional and psychological abuse. If she believes that submission to the husband MUST happen, this idea can be twisted in ways that one may not see as abusive. The submission things is inherently a recipe for disaster when you consider coercive control and emotional abuse.
Ephesians 5:22 can be used to justify emotional neglect ("I don't want to hear anymore about how you feel about..." for example), gaslighting (when submission is justified as "biblical," gaslighting is obviously going o occur), judgemental attitudes ("that outfit is immodest, I want you to change" is a possibility).
I hate the idea of submission, period. It's not healthy and inherently abusive.
also if you're not supposed to keep any records of your partner's wrongdoings, how are you ever going to see that they're abusive?
I CAN NOT emphasize/agree with this more. I got into a terrible marriage and my way of coping was hiding within these ideas of submissiveness. My ex was psychologically/mentally/emotionally abusive long before he was ever physically. I was the ideal biblical wife to my ex husband and that was his narcissistic dream. This video was extremely triggering ha.
I don't like the idea of submission either because when people talk about it, it's always on the woman to submit to her husband, they never say how the man should submit to her as well. It's never in a positive healthy way.
Like no...this is a partnership. Not a master/servant thing. Both should submit to each other, you serve each other, you listen to each other, you respect each other, you take each other's opinions and feedback into account.
"..Or my daddy" and we all cringe and laugh. This whole video is icky.
If you have to white knuckle everything all the time, maybe it's not something you need to be doing. Her sugary sweet monologue sounds like it's covering bitterness. Just my take. 😢
Thank you! These puritan beliefs about suffering just won't quit.
My win for the week is that a cardiologist told me my heart was pumping really well.
That is amazing news!! 💛🎉
That's awesome! ❤
congratulations!
❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
As an ex-fundie, I find these reaction videos on submission cathartic. For me personally, I think her view is rigid and restricting and the practical tips are more how to treat anyone you are in a relationship with.... nobody likes a backseat driver. I was actually wondering if her husband is a backseat driver and if she'd put up with it if he was. Her view also helps me realize how harmful those teachings were to me years ago and how much, imo, they reinforced and showed me how to, unknowingly, view myself as an object in so many nuanced and detailed ways. What a mind fuck truly it was for me and I'm still purging those mindsets!
Re: Milena messing up words- I think her native language is Portuguese and her parents are not native English speakers so she is bilingual. I think she sometimes gets English words and phrases confused or slightly off because it’s not her family of origin’s primary language. It’s been pretty consistent over time, not new.
My ex's parents had (past tense because he passed away) this dynamic in their marriage, where dad made all the decisions and rules. The way they executed it though was...odd. They wouldn't argue in front of the children at all. Like literally at all. So whenever she wanted to voice an opinion contrary to his, they would go hide in their bedroom, muffle the sound by cramming a blanket or something in the bottom door gap, and whisper argue. He (my ex) said multiple times they as kids would try and eavesdrop on their arguments, couldn't hear a thing. He said it was a very strange process getting to adulthood and realizing he had virtually no conflict resolution skills because his parents kept them all so hush hush, and they'd emerge doing whatever Dad said anyway. And whenever the siblings fought it just resulted in at least one of them being abused. Obviously it's not the most harmful way a submissive marriage can potentially affect someone, but it's a possibility.
I feel him. My parents were not religious and none was more submissive, but they never argued or disagree in front of me. I'm an only child so they never helped me process a conflict with a sibling or anything like that. It was very hard growing up and I had to work on that all alone while I was also trying to control the raging hormones of the teenage years. It made my life way more difficult than if they would have talked from time to time about things they disagree about (whatever that is).
Calling your husband "daddy" in the middle of a fight is giving "Daddy, chill" energy
💀💀💀 LORD HAVE MERCY
Creeepy
My win for the week was, after 1 year of sacrificing for a very long commute to work in a territory far from my home I was able to land a transfer to a territory closer to me! Everyone told me it would be a slim chance when I started but I got it! now I get to have more time back for myself to start working out again 😊
"naturally my flesh wants to talk... And I have to die to myself every single day" is the fundy woman's "I have no mouth and I must scream"
lol no
Just a heads up, the children in her first submission video are her own kids. I’ve been “following” her for years and those are definitely her kids, I don’t know why people would think they are not lol.
Same and I totally agree!
I do know that the one that had the face shown in that video isn’t hers. She did mention in either another video or an instagram story that she was babysitting for a friend that day. But yeah, all the other ones are hers.
Thanks for clarification! :)
I watched her starting 7 years ago or so and she always showed her kids
@@granolamomie we both watch style thoughts by Rita !!! Hi. 🧁
Omg “Naturally I want to talk and I want to make my opinion known”. And the problem is what? If you aren’t then you are in an abusive relationship. She is brainwashed and abused
If a man can't defend himself then should he really be leading
Unfortunately, I think this type of submissive woman is letting the enemy win rather than lose like she believes. Because these terms are so broad, because men are socialized to think less of women, and this thinking and behavior lets women think less of themselves as well, it isn’t what God wants but rather what the devil wants.
It is a 2-way street! “Do unto others as you would have done to you” is also in the freaking Bible. She’s infuriating. Women alone can’t do it all. Men alone can’t do it all… that’s why we have help, relationships, etc. marriage or not… humans need other humans. 🙄😒 Where’s the accountability for the men?!
Well you're not going to find it in a video talking about what women should do... Because it's not about what the men should be doing? Perhaps look up something like "how to be a biblical husband" etc.... just a tip.
She has many videos about how men should be acting in relationships with her husband. She says she does not have the authority to preach to men which is biblical.
I feel so bad that these women don’t think there can be harmony in a marriage without submission. I am a sahm of 2 girls, 2 and 6 months. We have a great relationship and partnership because we see each other as partners and friends first. And communication can not be underestimated.
Also the number of times she talks about being mean to your husband. Never. I have never been mean to my husband. Why would I be married to someone that I would treat so poorly.
You know it is possible to ask your hubby for help in a respectful way. We both work. I like to cook, and he washes the pots and pans. When I have a tough day at work, I tell him and ask him and the teenagers to help get dinner together.
I have been married for 33 years - I have never heard so much garbage in my life.
This woman raises my blood pressure more than the mlm babes 😒
18:31 I don’t think she’s saying that he “gets” to act however he wants if his wife is not respecting him. I interpreted it as it would be his fleshly inclination to respond in an unkind way. But husbands are called to love their wives the way that Christ loved the church. A man teaching men about that passage would be saying the same thing as Milena-don’t do what your flesh wants to do-do what God calls you to do. If both people in a marriage are trying to be less selfish and more loving towards their spouse-that is more than likely going to make for a harmonious relationship.
The face you made when she said to call your husband “daddy” in the middle of a fight literally made me laugh out loud!! I had the same reaction 🙈😂
How sad does one have to be to examine and review another womans life to bits just because you disagree and it doesnt align with your lifes view? This is just weird.
Exactly!!!! Milena's videos are so positive and about family.
Yes this is so weird to me that people do this.. like this is really sad that she doesn’t add on wisdom or other things instead she puts other people down that’s weird
why does she show other people's children on her channel but not her own?
@@pri2x0x if she decides to no longer show her own children that is her right to do so. We don’t know who the other children are. Also, how do we know if she didn’t already ask the parents of those kids if it’s ok to show them online? I’m not keeping tabs on her so i don’t track her every move but people are worried too much about other people’s lives.
@pandalilili i think the answer youre scrambling desperately for is shes a hypocrite, concerned with the privacy of her own children but completely willing to exploit the privacy of others' children.
My win for the week is that I'm getting back into journaling. I stopped altogether when I went to university, but I'm back to loving writing again.
A few things that irked me about Milena’s video:
1. Requiring the wife to
submit to her husband was a punishment for Adam and Eve’s disobedience, not God’s perfect design for marriage. (In Genesis 2: 19, God said that Adam had dominion over everything he named, but he didn't name the woman Eve until after they disobeyed God in chapter 3: 20.)
I believe that a true godly marriage (if you are so inclined) is one in which both spouses love, respect, and submit to *each other* and share familial/household responsibilities.
2. The term ‘die to self’ irks me because it's nowhere in the Bible. Christians are called to *deny* themselves, meaning that we should not give in to base selfishness, materialism, cruelty, and depravity, which are not characteristics of Christ. It doesn't mean that we allow ourselves to be dominated without responding/defending ourselves out of a misguided sense of duty.
I feel compassion for the women who were taught this because they don't know any other way and changing is difficult. However, the teaching that this is supposed to be the standard for everyone when it has only stifled the God-given inquisitiveness, leadership ability, and ambitions of so many Christian women breaks my heart.
I appreciate your take on this topic because your responses are pragmatic, nuanced, logical, and compassionate.
Great video as always!
Good lord! When I watched Milena back in the day I would have NEVER thought this would be her. Giiirrrrrllll the way I was bothered the whole time. Like girl you have rights sister! Being oppressed/subservient to man is NOT SUBMISSION. Girl I’m not a punching bag you gotta find somebody else to do that.
i used to watch her occasionally as well. shocked but not surprised that she has gone down the fundie path
are you married?
I love how she reads in 1 Peter 3, where it says wives can love their husbands through their actions, NOT through "outward adornments, braided hair and gold jewelry" and then one minute she tells us that we need to do our hair and makeup so husband can come home to "a hot wife that he loves" 🤮 MY husband loves me regardless of what I look like. He, like God, considers my heart above all else. Seems like my husband is probably more godly than Milena's 👀🤔
It says, "Do not let your adornment be MERELY outward..." merely means "just only." So don't only let your adornment be outwards, but also inwards. Matthew 7 also says not to judge others, or you too will be judged.
You misread and misinterpreted what she said and what the scripture says bud
@@jennifert5120exactly, may her heart repent. ❤
@@jennifert5120 I responded to what she said in her video. That's not gossip but nice try!
She is spending entirely too much time washing that tiny fry pan. I can not imagine spending 20 minutes on a tiny pan while my perfectly curled hair is down and my golden bracelets hit my wrists.
I saw another comment that mentioned this, but when she speaks on what women do and how women treat their husbands (according to her), her words just drip with scorn.
It sounds like she resents other women to me - which isn't an uncommon narrative in fundamentalist culture. Normally it angers me, but for some reason in her case, it makes me sad to hear. I can't imagine how she's been treated or what she's been told to make her view herself and other women so harshly.
My win for the week is that I got hired on for a permanent position!
Her warning about the abuse makes me sad. Not because it’s a bad thing to decide you aren’t going to put up with abuse, but because she goes on to perpetuate elements of psychological and emotional abuse and say THAT is okay to put up with. I don’t actually hear her say that the wife deserves respect as well. Both elements in a relationship are worthy of respect, not just the husband.
And the whole making herself presentable for her husband…Girl, you should make yourself presentable BECAUSE IT MAKES YOU FEEL GOOD. There are so many times when I was starting to hop back on the Depresso Expresso that a shower and a presentable outfit helped me to not punch that ticket. But you should also be able to give yourself the grace to admit that you aren’t feeling it and your husband should love and respect you enough to be okay with you not feeling it.
Milena: “All we have to do on judgment day is account for whether or not we submitted to our husbands.”
Tell me, how’d that go for Sapphira?
On the flip side of that coin, how do you think it’s going for Zipporah, or Abigail?
Did Deborah not teach men? Were all her prophecies and judgments in submission to her husband first?
“Well those were in Old Testament times.”
Great! So you’re saying God changes, then?…
Yes! I’ve been in the fundie spaces for years and always bring these up and they hate these. I’ve also heard about sapphira that “she should have chosen a better man” 😢
@@granolamomie oh good grief. Because women had ^so much choice^ in their spouses in that time and culture … 🙄. Do you ever wonder what these people are on?
The amount of young women who have adapted this mentality is concerning
Being with a man sounds exhausting. Also do men like women??? Orrrrr ??? So we are just helpers when married to a guy? Ima pass.
Omg I was thinking the same thing!
I am a God-fearing, Christ following wife and mother. I’ve followed Milena for a couple of years now (btw lover her). I’ve also seen her spiritual shift in her weekly videos, as you pointed out at the beginning. Even though I am a fan of her, her family and her content, Lately I find myself disagreeing quite a bit with her specifically with the way she describes Christianity and how drastic she portrays some things. She has the best intentions. It just comes off a bit extreme. Specially to women who may be more naïve when it comes to the word of God. But hey, if this is the lifestyle she’s happy with kudos to her. I just think she should put a bit more context When it comes to these types of videos. She should make it important to also point out that this is what she does in her marriage and spiritual journey. Not everyone’s walk with Christ looks the same. The important thing here is that we all have the same destination.
I feel like she talks a lot but says very little as in she’s just saying the same thing over and over in different ways.
Im not married whatsoever but I pray for a healthy relationship and Im praying for marriages that reflect what marriage should be in a wrong light. I view marriage as a partnership, and though I believe men and women have different roles in life, you can still come together and have a partnership built off the foundation of Christ and learn and grow together. I am learning what true respect and healthy relationships can look like, and though it is nice seeing someone talk about this stuff, it saddens (and frustrates) me when others don't see it.
Watching videos about these Fundy Christian marriages makes me very happy to be married to the man that im married to.
I can’t. I am an equal. I pull more money, I raise the kids, I take care of the house. He’s lucky af, as so am I 😂 I can’t compute this concept in my brain. I’ll never be less then
Being submissive doesn’t mean unequal
I am genuinely curious as a non-religious bystander, how biblically submissive women handled the death of a spouse? If they have deferred to him in all things for decades, how then do they cope with having to be the sudden decision maker? This doesn't seem like a healthy way for an adult woman to behave, she mashes it sound almost like being in a perpetual state of childhood. I honestly don't get it.
It's not biblical. It's how sad men twist certain Bible verses to control women. The Bible calls for women to be involved in the greater economy outside of the home and are absolutely able to question and defy their husbands if they stray from virtue.
The end there “all the 🚩 “ made my heart sad . It feels like she I s headed towards legalism. I don’t know anything about her but I don’t want that for anyone.
That was horrific ha. I wonder about her bizarre assumptions (ie. woman naturally are controlling & nagging etc.) and examples (her talking her husbands ear off). I was in an abusive relationship for about 10 years where I coped by diving deep into the trad wife lifestyle and honestly now that I’ve been in therapy for 3 years and I’ve had an opportunity to reflect on that time in my life I’m kind of just left speechless by that video. I can’t believe I lived that lifestyle for as long as I did. Now that I’m in a healthy relationship I realize how easy it is to not nag or control when I have a kind and caring partner ha. Like I don’t need to tame my tongue because we have mutual love and respect for each other. Relationships are NOT supposed to be that kind of hard. My heart aches for her.
Yeah, I also felt like she was telling on herself... It's okay to have issues, you just need to adress the issues at the root, not to struggle throught something else, in my honest opinion.
I feel that you are asking valid questions but most of this video was nitpicking every she says, wears, how she speaks. I watched this same video and understood the message she was trying to convey, nothing was confusing or offensive. It threw me a bit off guard when you went as far as saying that she “borrowed” someone else’s kids for a video? A very odd assumption.
I believe you are being overly judgmental. You don’t need to have the same viewpoints or perspectives but I picked up from your commentary and reactions that you are knit-picking points she is making..
48:07 One of the less talked about signs of an abusive relationship is when a partner drives recklessly and does not take your safety or comfort into account. Regardless of what your relationship is with a person, whether it's a friend or family member or romantic partner, you should be able to provide feedback if you are concerned about their driving. Your life is in their hands. If you tell them something they're doing makes you uncomfortable or unsafe, they should be able to respect that and make changes to make sure you feel safe. If they get angry with you for wanting to feel safe, that's concerning. Now, there's obviously good and not so great ways to provide this feedback, so we should be mindful of how we're giving feedback, but we should be allowed to give this feedback.
You might touch on it later but haven’t as I’m listening (had to come to the RUclips video to comment as I was listening on Spotify 😂) but I am shocked and appalled and confused at the idea that women don’t understand the need to feel respected? Like what? That’s universal. You should absolutely feel that and expect your partner to respect you. So many positives build off of that. And so many negatives build off of not having respect, many veering into abusive behaviors.
Literally. It was from a book “love and respect” that has been pushed around in fundie spaces a lot. This idea that women can be disrespected even horribly so but need love. Like how can you love someone you don’t respect!?
@@granolamomie You hit the nail on the head. I always say that it’s impossible to love someone without respecting them. It’s possible to feel affection, desire, fondness, and/or appreciation for a person without respecting them. But love? No.
"It's so natural for us to nag our husbands" - speak for yourself.
From context (and deductive reasoning), it’s likely that the “nagging” is actually reasonable requests for her husband to complete the tasks necessary to take care of his children and his home. And those reasonable requests are likely made in a state of frustration and/or exasperation because it’s reasonable to expect an adult to do what’s necessary without prompting instead of them refraining from childcare and housework unless being actively managed by their spouse.
Often, men/fathers will claim that they “help” with childcare or housework when their wives directly request their “help.” Meaning, that their wives are not only doing most of the housework and childcare (as well as likely having a separate job) but these men/fathers give their wives _another_ job which is to manage their husbands-an adult who, according to evangelical Christians, is the leader and head of household.
Weird.
Those children that shows in her videos ARE HERS. I don’t know who it was telling they’re not but yes they are. For some reason she chose not to show her kids faces anymore. She said that sometimes kids will show on her videos but she won’t show their faces anymore.
All of her examples she gave of the interactions with her husband come across as her being a narcissist.
I have a question though… she talked about how we should do it their way even though it’s not our prefered way… but my logic is that we are the helper of our husband so if something seems easier done a certain way why would i keep it from him instead of respectfully and softly telling him the maybe easier way? Hope someone can answer and understands my question
All I can think of is training dogs every time she says “submission” and “obedience”. Which is both hilarious and sad.
The difference between you and her is that she speaks from the understanding that the holy spirit has given her. You only speak of what you think and what you think is correct based on your life experiences. We need to let go of what we think and what we are accustomed to and start asking the holy spirit for understanding and true transformation. God bless you.
This!! 🙌🏼 once you receive understanding from the Holy Spirit it all makes sense and you know that she is not perfect and still human
Exactly we are still in the hands of the potter and we are being transformed as seemed best to him. We have no say in what we think is right or wrong. I love the book of Job when God confronts Job and tells him all God is in control of this helped open my eyes and now I find it funny how we mere humans like to fight with the maker thinking we know best. I pray for all who read this that God may have mercy on us and give us understanding and true wisdom to fully understand his word.@@Velenty.Mauricia
Ok then how come no one can seem to agree about what the holy spirit actually says? How come the bible constantly contradicts itself in what it tells people to do and be? It's easy to THINK you're understanding something, it's a lot harder to be honest with the fact that you don't actually know.
Taking the Lord's name in vain isn't just about swear words. Beware those who claim to speak for God with no authority.
@@StonedHunter It's not contradicting at all. It says the same thing over and over. That is confirmation from the Lord. The Bible was written over a time laps of 1500 years with over 40 authors and they all agree with each other. You can read the prophets like Isaiah and then read the New Testament and see how it's all the same. Never once does the Bible contradict itself because it was inspired by God and he is perfect and divine. I encourage you to do a short prayer before you read the bible (don't judge until you've read all of it). Say Lord please help me understand your word, and have it be like the seed that is planted in good soil, and help it bear good fruit at its time. - Hope this helps, Good bless you!
I watched this on my lunch break and I was HEATED. I support women. But I don’t support being made to feel less than because I don’t subscribe to an interpretation of Bible. First of all I believe the mainstream interpretation of submission is wrong. But I’m not gonna go for blows over that. I just won’t be buying into it. Cause I’ve lived my life in a box I’m not doing with that someone I’m gonna spend the rest of my life with. I like to be joyful and not being who God created me to be is subjecting my life to hell. And that’s not where I’m going so I won’t be doing none of this foolishness
Being pure is so important it’s on her list twice so naturally she talks about it the least, gives 0 practical examples, and orders you to do the work she promised she has educated herself on enough to make this video about it…
How is a gentle spirit equated to gentle guarded words? These are two different things someone can have gentle, guarded words, and have very non gentle spirit, I believe.
32:10 see this is one of the things that frustrates me.
I work from home and my husband works out of the home.
And he believes that I should do all the home things since I work from home.
But we’ve worked on it and have divided the chores in the home. We both contribute to our household financially. And we both live here as well. Not all women are SAHM.
Win for the week: uni classes started again this week and I just had a really long day, but now I'm settling down for dinner ready to watch a new B Haney video!
She has a history of postpartum depression and she expresses that she has struggled with selfishness and submission and gentleness and taming the tongue. And her husband has a history of getting distracted and taking forget to get from point a to point b. Or staying longer just because. He has expressed he has a struggle with time management (time blindness). And this has been a struggle in their marriage in the past.
Just constructive criticism: when reacting to videos, remember that the way you are understanding it may not be what she is trying to say, for example when she says in the beginning about saying what you feel, it could be about saying something that is not constructive or just that you feel very negative and whatever you are going to say will just hurt, then it’s better not to say it ( that goes for everyone ) Or the part that the man needs respect or he doesn’t feel like protecting you, we can all feel a certain kind of way but the fact that we still have to love and protect our wives doesn’t change, she’s didn’t say that he will stop loving and protecting you but maybe he won’t feel like it just like sometimes we don’t feel like doing what we’re suppose to, but we always try. Just try to be a bit more positive with what she is saying and understand that the way you are seeing it might not be exactly what she is trying to say. Between Christian women everything should be encouragement and/or correction with love.
I don’t believe she’s saying her husband is free to live in sin. Her point is that even though our husbands aren’t perfect, we are still to be submissive. She’s highlighting character flaws and then giving actionable things we can do to still love and submit to them. She’s not giving husbands a free card.
Yep!
@@Raya-ir4tm absolutely! I do believe there are some like that as well and I it’s sad that some husbands are like that. But what I believe Milena is trying to point out is that the power isn’t within us. Our job isn’t to convict, that’s the Lord’s job. God has the power to power to convict and correct. And yes, your husband will hurt you the same way you will hurt your husband sometimes (emotionally) because we are sinful, fallen, imperfect people. Milena is encouraging us to direct the focus onto ourselves because we can only control ourselves, no one else. And she’s encouraging us to hand over the things out of control to the One who does have control-God.
It sounds like Milena is telling us according to the bible, not only will you be a mom to children, you're commanded to be a mom to a grown man, too😅
So this is a great example of why people who don’t know how to do exegesis should not be teaching anybody. Also why if you aren’t using a concordance , you should not be teaching anyone.
The word helper in this context is actually the word ezer. This word is used very few times, and is reduced to refer two people-woman and God. Her belief of how the word helper is used also indicate that she believes that God should bow down to man.
Anyone who uses that verse as a way to indicate that women should submit to God are literally being sacrilegious. They are also showing that they do not know they’re talking about, that they have a poor Education if any education or they were manipulating you in order to get what they want. Many biblical scholars agree that because of the use of that word specifically it completely changes the concept of what submit means in the Bible and submission of the wife to a husband would be more like a partnership. This understanding is also the basis of egalitarianism, now that concept of biblical egalitarianism is a manipulation designed to force two puzzle pieces (submission and the use of the word Ezer) together in a way that it doesn’t disturb the rest of the harmful worldview, but it’s still an example that in this video it is COMPLETELY misinterpreted.
B - you are such a vibe in this! The makeup, nails, hair, sweater! 😍
Agree, she looks stunning 🖤
Those are her kids..
I've been following her for a while. She'll have them on the video. But cut off moments where their faces are showing
“Are you treating your husband like the man you love most….or are you treating him like a stranger off the side of the road that you absolutely hate?”
WHAT?!?!
Yes. You are absolutely right that is what she is saying in 18 mins. We are only accountable for what we do in this life. Our job is to fulfill the role God has for us, therefore we should do it regardless of how our husbands are fulfilling their role. Our husbands will be held accountable for what they do and don’t do.
@@Raya-ir4tmactually, biblically, your husband is expected to lead, love, provide protect and even give up his life for you (if it comes to that). Yes. I wouldn’t settle for anything less. That’s why it’s very important to only date seriously with the goal of marriage. All the examples we see in society have been distorted by sin. Make sure you look to the Bible for real answers not people, we are all faulty.
Familiarity breeds contempt and children.
--Mark Twain
That's what came to mind when you were speaking about familiarity.
It's important in intimate relationships to make sure that just because one person is so familiar with the other other person that they disrespect, forget about, or take them for granted, or take advantage of them.
For me, that is one way that familiarity can be bad/dangerous.
However, thankfully this can be prevented if both/all parties in the relationship are taking steps to actively respect one another's boundaries.
Win for the week.
After three weeks of kids not sleeping and being sick, they slept all night last night.
Girl, that is a WIN! Glad they're better!
I’ve watched and listened to Milena’s RUclips videos/podcast on and off for a few years and I always thought that 1. Nothing that her or her husband said ever really made sense, they would just constantly read bible verses with no explanation. And 2. She does struggle with her speech and has mentioned that in her podcast many times.
I think that she means well, but this just shows you that some people should be the one teaching scripture and others should listen. So glad that you made this video because I thought I was the only one who thought this way about her!
Your confusion with dying to the flesh is a good indicator that you may not be as informed
Very sure she shares her opinion with her husband, she always shares her opinion anyway (she has an entire RUclips etc)
First start out with thinking you yourself aren’t your own, your God’s! So submitting is already something all Christians should be familiar with. Often times we get immediately defensive about submitting at all
You seem like you have a negative mindset towards her before even listening, judgmental really.
The comment section is just straight up gossip!
I don’t think she’s saying that the men who aren’t being good husbands are off the hook and wives have to be perfect. But as a wife you should be focused on what you do for them not what they do for you since marriage is servitude. They should also be a great husband!
There’s also something about not submitting when they are bringing you into sin.
I just wanted to comment that seeing a woman wanting to dissect another woman’s video and tearing it down…it almost seems you may not really understand most of the concepts here and that might just mean more reading or praying for you if you’re curious about these topics
There are many books on this, harder to understand this when you don’t have a man you truly want to lead you as he’s led by God (idk you, it’s the first video I’ve seen of you)
Also seems you’re selective hearing - to control or manipulate (to control with skill) a situation- would make it turn out in your favor. There’s a lot about not living by your own will but living by Gods will tied into that.
The thing you’re missing about women being at home is that they are mothers sometimes as well that should be at home.
yes in 2024 both parents probably have to work in order to live. That’s not a great thing! Daycare is really expensive! It’s strange to have children and not raise them majority of the time.
.
you might as well not talk about submission at all if you aren’t clear on a number of other things first - assuming you aren’t from the video
I would really say, if you didn’t like hearing most of this, it may not be something for you at this time! With my ears, I can relate! That is after agreeing with a lot of other things before submission at all! You may hear this with a new set of ears sometime in the future and it may make more sense.
Someone else said it on here but English is her second language. Yes she mispronounces on her videos sometimes!
I’m not sure why your approach is to create these reaction videos!
If you can tell by the way I took you at face value, I’m sure I don’t have any context like who you are, if you’re not Christian at all, what your purpose is for these videos, etc.
I just truly hope I don’t have another woman making videos about me behind my back.
But I’ll say it’s more likely she will continue down this route as she has been convicted about a number of things personal to her (modesty, submission, etc)
I didn’t realize this video was so long 😂 I didn’t know if I was going to get through all of it…. Took me all night with stopping and starting, also writing this!
You spent some time and effort with this video and there were some additions you made that I liked!
hold up, i thought wives were to respect their husbands and husbands are to love their wives. if that's the case, then shouldn't those verses from 1 corinthians 13 be even more important and relevant for husbands??
Hi! I've been binge watching your content for the last two days and just subscribed. I'm so glad I found you and wanted to tell you that I have extreme amounts of religious trauma from the christian religion. I watch a lot of the reaction videos of the problematic channels you cover. Because it feels safe and validating when people review them and point out the toxic and hurtful aspects. The fact that you identify from a Christian perspective( Whatever that faith journey and definition is for you) and are so balanced, intellectual and respectful gives me a lot of hope. Thank you for creating a safe space and for being you.
Oh! My win for the week is getting a one hour massage!
"You didn't merry Jesus. Don't hold him to such high standards.
But do put him abouve yourself while you hold yourself to these ridiculously high standards."
So why don't we get to hold the husband to higher standards if they're meant to be of higher standing and we're meant to look up to them for guidance. That seems like the only appropriate time to hold a person to a higher standard.
35:27 She says ask your husband what makes him feel respected and the gives having yourself put together as an example. Excuse me?! Someone making themselves look good for you can make you feel nice or appreciated even, but it shouldn't make anyone feel respected.
58:32 Also, saying "you are right" during an argument is the most unproductive thing I've ever heard! It doesn't solve the argument at all and it is definitely just being a doormat. It's disingenuous because usually in an argument you disagree on what the right thing is, that's why it's an argument.
Watching this stuff makes me so happy to be a Catholic raised atheist! Fundamentalists make Catholics look downright normal. I feel sorry for people raised like that!
35:59 yeah it’s fine to look best for your husband. But I will also say that husbands also need to nurture the relationship and not just put it on the wife to do it all.
I am streaming this on my big TV and your eyeshadow is so pretty!! Also, thanks for the content!
Yes please keep reacting!!!! I like Milena but also some things she says make me question things. Love hearing your point of view.
I used to love her content but she’s moved further down this fundie line and it’s harder
@@granolamomie same here. Im not christian but she made good content but now it's increasingly harmful.
Is this person married?
I feel the same! Milena was an inspiration for my faith a while ago, but lately it’s been hurting my heart more when I hear her words.
59:55 Who is ‘the enemy’?? The devil?? She makes it sound like a bitter ex waiting for her marriage to fall apart 😂.
She goes on to say that the enemy is “really threatened” by a submissive wife. Um, why? Wouldn’t that dynamic actually make it easier for “the enemy” to “attack” a marriage? “The enemy” would only have to lead the husband down the wrong path instead of the husband and wife who is allowed to be a vocal equal in leadership and decision-making within the family. Misogynistic crap never makes sense.
This makes me really sad, I used to really like watching Milena as a Christian wife myself because I used to believe she gave good advise but lately and now with these videos it all seems so twisted. This all seems manipulative and like it’s not coming from her heart, this seems to be coming from another source that doesn’t have her best interest at heart
From the outside in, it feels like she's taking a lot of opinions and ideas from Western church culture---the more fundamental stuff---and just running with it. To be fair, she's probably just regurgitating things she's heard and has been told is correct. We all do it, so I'm trying to extend some empathy for her.
My win for the week is that i only had to go stress cry once when we started using a completely new computer system across not just my hospital but our entire region! It was a six month prep process and a looooooot went into it but it went incredibly smoothly (at least in our area). I'm relatively new to your channel but I love how you have such a balanced take on everything.
I guess my question is whether these are things only women/wives should do but not men/husbands, or whether being respectful is mutual (i.e. the husband also shows respect to the wife in the way that the wife appreciates) and whether being quiet is mutual (or is it ok for the husband, when he is the passenger in the car, to be constantly giving advice and criticizing the wife's driving)? And I'm afraid that's really the only practical tips I heard from Milena: be respectful and be quiet. She also said pure, but didn't actually give any tips apart from "be a good homemaker"
And I really worry when she says that even if the husband is hurtful (constantly? frequently?), the wife needs to just pray and put up with the hurt
I’ve watched Milena since 2019, quite some time… and I do feel that with her recent, and I would even say quite sudden, shift of personality at times she does sound “unsure” of what she is saying. Personally I feel like she is getting really defensive and always trying to “make a speech” about some hot topic, idk it’s not as genuine as it used to be… but I do appreciate her insight on some topics and I actually got more involved in Christianity after watching her content back then, idk sometimes it just feels like she is a different person. Idk if anyone who watches her can relate.
I think alot of what she is saying would be good if it wasn't gendered. Both men and women should be loved and respected. No one likes it if their partner is really critical, not just men. Everyone likes a homecooked meal at the end of the day, not just men. Rarr!
This kind of paints her husband in a bad light tbh
Omg please don't tell me the family vloggers have decided that renting/borrowing children as RUclips props is the solution to protecting their own kids' privacy. This can't be real. Yeah, girl...I can't get past that part either.
It’s not that serious. Her friends didn’t mind her kids being in her video so she didn’t take it out. Y’all are very dramatic.
Yay love your videos my win was not getting overwhelmed this week!
I can’t believe you said you are a Christian and you are making videos like this…
Exactly.
Sounds like you’re judging - which isn’t a Christian thing to do.
@@lhurt9792 it’s not judging. Someone that “claims” to be a Christian shouldn’t act like this. It’s disrespectful.
This!
I mean i can't believe some of the unhealthy relationship tips christian influencers put out for the public like not being allowed to have an opinion in your home lol
B talks about toxic messages fundies like to spread about relationships.
She’s always spoken like this, I think it’s possibly a touch of dyslexia because it’s common for her to mix up words or say them in the wrong order or mispronounce them even when they’re simple.
She needs to give me the description of what a husband’s expectations and treatment of the wife is
Her husband made that video
My win for the week is that I started training today for a promotion at work I recently got 🎉
Congratulations on your promotion! I hope your training goes well 💛
My husband would fall out of love with me if I stopped telling him my opinion and calling him out in his shortcomings! I did that once and he was so offended because he says we have to be able to call each other out so that we can improve and be better sooo I don’t agree with what she says 🥴
Awww this was sweet to read.
My win for the week is that I got my period! Idk what’s wrong with my body but it’s been gone for over two months 🤷♀️
My win for the week is that i finally got a fishtank and set it up with all the plants and stuff and that in a month or so i can put the fish in!!
So if I don’t respect my husband he won’t feel protective of me???? That’s so sad that she thinks that
I would like to mention how it’s very sad and absurd to me that she mentioned how wives lack “self control” when it comes not nagging the husband, yet these group of Christian influences preach so heavily against modesty because the men can’t control their lustful desires …😅wow okay!
They were her kids except for the one. And the mom of that child is a public figure and she doesn’t mind them being on the internet. I do understand the hold up tho, because I too was confused to why she showed her friend’s baby. But I did want you to know the facts☺️
Honestly, some of these tips have been very beneficial to my marriage 🤷 but i love the perspective
I'm pretty sure English isn't her first language/she is bilingual. I know you said youre not trying to be rude about it, but i think you would absolutely call out i e. paul and morgan for pointing something like that out.
Those are her kids except one i think. I dont actually think its that weird. As a photographer i will not share my own child, but many people do not care and sign the model release without a second thought.
Win for the week: we found hardwood floors under our carpet!
My win: I released my debut novel this week 😁😁😁
So exciting! What’s it called and where can we get it?
@@marisanelsey it's called Deep Water and it's available on Amazon and B&N online 😁
Big win!!
Commenting as watching. I have been a milena watcher for a years and have noticed the shift in her content. I will say that in the first video only the child that has its face shown is not hers, the ones running around are hers. Still doesn’t make any sense why to show her friends when she doesn’t show hers but I thought I’d point that out.
Now on the part of her stumbling on her words. I’ve been watching her for four plus years and as far as I remember she always has stumbled over her words. Kind of in a way where it’s like she is just talking as a stream of consciousness and not planned out
Next part with the traffic, on I think one of their most recent podcasts, they did speak about one of their most recent fights and it was because her husband got home late. I can’t remember if it was due to traffic or just work but yes, I’d say that it is something that she gets upset about.
I also want to add that I did notice this shift slowly starting after her yearly break from RUclips that she takes but the DRAMATIC shift really started after she had her miscarriage. She even mentioned that in one of their most recent podcast episodes. And it makes me incredibly sad to think that maybe she believes that she upset God and had somehow caused that to happen to her and that is why she has had such a dramatic shift.
My husband always calls me something sweet when I’m upset/we’re disagreeing, And I have to say, it just makes me more annoyed 😂😂
Serious question - How is it biblical to make videos of you watching other people’s videos and tearing them apart? This is really nit picky and sad. Aren’t we supposed to be lifting one another up, not being judgmental?
Yes and amen, wolves in sheep clothing 😔 most of what Milena is saying aligns with the word of God and Holy Spirit will confirm through His word
No one is being uplifted by overlooking abusive relationship dynamics.
Is she a christian? I’m just so confused. This feels so judgemental
If someones promoting abusive and/or toxic relationships then uh they deserved to be judged.
I just wanted to say; the kids in the first part are definitely hers. It's one thing to do a reaction video towards one of her videos but please don't spread lies about her. Those are her kids. If you are not completely sure then just don't say anything at all. She can come across as a bit extreme but let's remember were all sisters in christ and submission for her might look a bit different than for someone else. Submission is biblical if used in a healthy and loving relationship, of course. And submission doesn't mean that you don't have a say or a part in making decisions for your family. If you don't like her then don't watch her videos.
I’ve been scrolling to find this comment!!! Yess like do you not have a life? I’m sure Mi is a good servant and obedient to the lord I don’t understand why people think it’s okay to bash on others