I just love this character in general, I used to imatate him a lot. I just love the way he goes mad, in fact my favourite actor, Justin Fletcher loves this show, he created Gigglebiz which was a child freindly version of this.
What Friday? Did you say...? Black!!!!??? Black Friday??? Everyday is BLACK, BLACK, BLACK!!! Black like the eternal night that harrows my soul the yawning abyss of tortured wretched beings that do mock with bitter spite my futile attempts at escape. BLACK! Where shall we sleep tonight mother? Atop fathers grave?
My daughter and I used to love this. We'd completely bamboozle my sister by saying "Black, black! It's all black!" Then I'd say "My eyes are pies! And yours are lies!" And my daughter would do lobster hands and say "Into the chasm of clams". And my sister was like "what are you two even on about?" Ah, the mother and daughter bond. I miss it.
@@blackmore4 I'm not sure it is poking fun at PC? I see the humour as being about someone on the surface being sweet and inoffensive to the point of being boring, but underneath that they're actually a swirling rage of insane gibberish.
I love this. At art foundation course we students were taught that true black can never be mixed on the palette and is made up from several other dark colours - or as near as we could mix it. And the tutors were always banging on about it. So for me the joke is particularly amusing. BLACK!!! 🎨
When he says the bit about "fold him like a ticket and poke him in a hole" it reminds me of when I was on a bus in the 70's in London and I used to roll up my tickets on the bus and poke them into the rivet holes. I did it once and the other passengers were looking at me like I was mad ! This sketch takes me back to then every time..... :)
Oh my, I was so reminded of this sketch when William Shatner returned from it brief trip from the edge of space and spoke about the "blue blanket of the sky" then the black "death" of space.
My mother went to an adult education centre and there was a painter called Johnny, he looked like him and he sounded like him but he did not act like him when he thought about the colour black.
For me, this was the very best "Johnny", "the pies but yours are lies" and "what should we do with father" are part of my vocabulary lol, people who didn't watch the fast show are often puzzled
Charley higson has definitely taken influence from david tibet of current 93 obscurity here! I'm even convinced that they once used the line "my eyes are pies" and the one about clams as well!!!!
Why oh why do I find this character/sketch so damned funny? Depressive Johnny and his companion out on a field trip painting and the inevitable regressive manic episode...😲😆😅🤣😂
It's hard to forget the legacy and value in the history of British culture, of this genius artist. More profound than Colonel Kurtz, it's very hard not to laugh at this.
I used to laugh at this but never fully understood it. Until a few years later I started to suffer from depression. Not something I get much now I have found a cure....Grandchildren. Now I find it even funnier than before. The fast show was brilliant.
It’s on my YT feed yet again… and of course I had to watch it and still find as funny as ever. Did Charlie smd Arabella ad-lib this as it has that feel.
Приколы
![HTV WEST adverts 1992 [34]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/njSrWnaf4fc/mqdefault.jpg)
"They put me in the cellar and feed me pins" was one of Johnny's best ever lines.
I'm trying to find that one....
@@NicoJW Me too!
"My eyes are pies and yours are lies " probably the best one liner in the universe !!!
Yes I agree
Yes , probably = with " We crawl on our knees towards our doom ....."
I reenact this in Greggs sometimes, they're not overly keen
@@worldaccordingtodunk whats your trigger word? mines pasty and i do love pasties. oh no here I go again.
I say this all the time
On one of them he says, "where are we sleeping tonight mother, FATHERS GRAVE?"
I feel like I quote this all the time and no one ever gets it. It's my favourite.
ruclips.net/video/wj84tfS7ag4/видео.html - I mean it's been 5 years since this comment but in case you haven't found the clip yet.
Whenever I'm feeling down I watch this, "MY EYES ARE PIES!!!"
AND YOURS ARE LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
What shall we do with Father?
@@machomanOOOOHYEEEAH fold him up like a ticket and poke him in a hole??
Brilliant! lol
They're here, they're here, they've landed on the pier!
My favorite Johnny Nice clip. His companion's desperate attempts at derailing his train of thought and inevitable result is just brilliant.
I love how his foot gets stuck in the stool.
I just love this character in general, I used to imatate him a lot. I just love the way he goes mad, in fact my favourite actor, Justin Fletcher loves this show, he created Gigglebiz which was a child freindly version of this.
I tried to imitate said character on a night out in brixton, if I'm honest the reviews were mixed
@@jimmymcguire8217 brilliant!
I reckon that was unintentional, which makes it even funnier. It'd be hard to do that deliberately.
@@jimmymcguire8217 😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄
I remember this growing up in the 90's, absolutely brilliant, a swift antidote to depression
I really felt sorry for poor Johnny during the black friday period when we was getting bombarded with adverts, his house must be totally trashed.
What Friday? Did you say...? Black!!!!??? Black Friday??? Everyday is BLACK, BLACK, BLACK!!! Black like the eternal night that harrows my soul the yawning abyss of tortured wretched beings that do mock with bitter spite my futile attempts at escape. BLACK! Where shall we sleep tonight mother? Atop fathers grave?
+Woody Hutton
YOU LOCK ME IN THE CELLAR AND FEED ME PINS!
Woody Hutton you are a genius
Adverts for pies , perhaps ??
You alright Dave! How's current 93 doing these days!!!!
"like the endless blackness of space that leads to the chasm of clams" hahaha
that was it for me. i was on the floor laughing.
"Like the endless blackness of space that leads to the casm of clams" 😂😂😂😂😂
''my eyes are pies and yours are all lies'' and ''chasm of clams'' interestingly enough are in some poems of aliester crowley. Great stuff!
I loved this character when it was on T.V "WHAT SHALL WE DO WITH FATHER FOLD HIM LIKE A TICKET AND POKE HIM IN A HOLE?" HA HA
Do you remember that old Rolling Stones song that goes: "I see a red door and I want it painted bla...".. I mean: "Brown Sugar"
Check out Ramon Djawadi’s versions of that track if you haven’t heard it.
So good.
*Ramin Djawadi
orange,orange!
0:58 That sudden cut at the end of her sentence followed by his face and "BLACK" in a low-angle shot. Brilliant editing. Genius.
I like the way she gaslights him to stop him thinking of the colour black, it's the funniest thing in this sketch.
and I thank you because I had never hear of "gaslighting" someone. You do learn something new every day
@@RonWylie-gk5lcthere is no such thing as gaslighting. you must have remembered that wrong.
You see what I did there
This still has me in stitches even 30 years on 😆 comic genius ! K
Why does "They're here ... they've landed on the pier" sound weirdly chilling? Some of Johnny's proclamations are quite sinister...
I find most of them are rather sinister.
Edward Cat. It’s because they HAVE landed on the pier.........!
Ahead of their time
"Maggots on toast" got me as a kid
They are occultists and serve the devil, that’s why! However, Jesus is the Way, the Truth and the Life 🕊❤️
"The Chasm of Clams"
this features in one of aliester crowley's poems when referring to the birth of venus. ''a light shone forth amongst the chasm of clams''
They're here they've landed on the pier. 😁 😂😂
I don't understand this sentence.
@@sally9805 Exactly
My daughter and I used to love this. We'd completely bamboozle my sister by saying "Black, black! It's all black!" Then I'd say "My eyes are pies! And yours are lies!" And my daughter would do lobster hands and say "Into the chasm of clams". And my sister was like "what are you two even on about?" Ah, the mother and daughter bond. I miss it.
I love how he always destroyed his wife's painting as well 😂
Sister wife?
Carer?
76 people are going to be sent to the Chasm Of Clams , for the heresy of disliking this masterpiece !!
This still has to be my favourite sketch of all the Fast Shows. I agree with the comments below that it is still unrivalled. Thank you for sharing
Could you explain it? The joke. I mean I get that it's poking fun at political correctness but is there more?
Yes this was the very best for me, It is just perfect, change anything and it would not be as good
@@blackmore4 I'm not sure it is poking fun at PC?
I see the humour as being about someone on the surface being sweet and inoffensive to the point of being boring, but underneath that they're actually a swirling rage of insane gibberish.
@blackmore4 If you don’t get it no amount of explanation will help. Humour is like a frog - it doesn’t survive dissection.
@@blackmore4 it's funny because it makes you laugh
This is my favourite Johnny Nice Painter sketch. The way she walks straight into it is still hilarious
Love this scene. Wish I could find the one where he screams "WE DON'T WANT TO DIIEEEE........ They wait for me in the forest!". Brilliant!
I love this. At art foundation course we students were taught that true black can never be mixed on the palette and is made up from several other dark colours - or as near as we could mix it. And the tutors were always banging on about it. So for me the joke is particularly amusing. BLACK!!! 🎨
Of course now we have vanta black and more recently the even darker one created at MIT in 2019. Johnny wouldn't be able to handle them.
We got the same at A level
Surly you would have to mix them to make..... BLACK!
This was one of the better sketches they did, ridiculously funny! Had me in tears!🤣😂🤣😂
All done in one take as well. Sheer brilliance!
Apart from when he gets his foot stuck!
@@AndyJackson380 Which added to the sketch & made funnier
Fast show is my favourite sketch show of all time and Charlie higson plays my most favourite characters
Their hair, they're here, landed on the peer.
When he says the bit about "fold him like a ticket and poke him in a hole" it reminds me of when I was on a bus in the 70's in London and I used to roll up my tickets on the bus and poke them into the rivet holes. I did it once and the other passengers were looking at me like I was mad ! This sketch takes me back to then every time..... :)
I think sometimes we all want to do a Johnny!
Oh my, I was so reminded of this sketch when William Shatner returned from it brief trip from the edge of space and spoke about the "blue blanket of the sky" then the black "death" of space.
My mother went to an adult education centre and there was a painter called Johnny, he looked like him and he sounded like him but he did not act like him when he thought about the colour black.
LIKE THE ENDLESS BLACKNESS OF SPACE THAT LEADS TO THE CASM OF CLAMS!!!
I probably go crazy like Johnny soon the way things in my life are going.
Take care, man. We will all soon be one with the void. Until then, take it easy.
4 years later, hope you're doing okay
For me, this was the very best "Johnny", "the pies but yours are lies" and "what should we do with father" are part of my vocabulary lol, people who didn't watch the fast show are often puzzled
the writing for this series of shows were so well timed and executed.
I love the way that he shouts a distorted 'black' when he throws the easel!!!? Hahahaha
Why do I get the feeling that I'm watching this in therapy?
The fast show was the best ever, I never tire of watching it :) thank you for the upload
Thank you so much, James, for your efforts. They are much appreciated by me - and many others, I'm sure (black!)
"lock me in the cellar and feed me pins!"
Loved this era of my life! ❤
I wonder if Mr Higson was ad-libbing Johnny's demented ramblings? Absolute genius.
Perfectly brilliant, you feed me pins.
"You lock me in the cellar and feed me pins"
"What's for dinner tonight mother is it maggots?"
The chasm....OF CLAMS!!
She keeps his madness alive and thriving. She is controlling, enabling him. " time to go home Johnny"....🤣🤣
I now HAVE to sing bah, bah, twinkle, little star...
I think this the funniest one they did.
the fast show was a new form of comedy and for me still unmatched, i wish they would do some new stuff !! :) thanks for the vid
The chasm of clams haha
Charley higson has definitely taken influence from david tibet of current 93 obscurity here! I'm even convinced that they once used the line "my eyes are pies" and the one about clams as well!!!!
Black ships in my eyes! Glad I’m not the only one to get the David Tibet similarities
Only got “Black Ships Ate The Sky” on cd! Wish i’d got that on vinyl, will cost a fortune now unless Dave reissues it soon!!!!
.......Or is he too busy fighting the clams in the cave, eating pins and painting BLACK! BLACK! These days to be bothered?!
Genius sketch! I used to imamtate this as I found it absolutely hailiarious.
Oh God how I love these characters and Johnny and Katie best of all, from first seeing this it never left me lol
I watched an interview with Charlie Higson. He told that Arabella Weir never knew what was about to happen, her job was to keep straight face.
“Their here their here. They’ve landed on the pier”!
Why oh why do I find this character/sketch so damned funny? Depressive Johnny and his companion out on a field trip painting and the inevitable regressive manic episode...😲😆😅🤣😂
Pure gold.
Three Men, Two Men, One Man and his Dog
WENT to mow a meadow
😂
7 people must be clams.
OH my god - this is still just as funny now, amazing show
It's hard to forget the legacy and value in the history of British culture, of this genius artist. More profound than Colonel Kurtz, it's very hard not to laugh at this.
Johnny speaks in post-rock song titles.
Absolutely the best one line my eyes are pies and yours are lies genius
Sounds like a T. S. Eliot poem! (I like T. S. Eliot, really.)
Giles and Mary from Gogglebox in a nutshell
the chasm of clams!
Fantastic! :)
they look for me in the caves
"You locked me in the cellar and fed me PINS"
All on its own against all that *black*
LOL
Forget about the sheep,,Think about that star.That tiny star twinkling away in the night sky! Always tickles me! lol
''up there amongst all that ...black.'' WHEEZE.
Inspired by the beatles, lucy in the pie with diamonds
Superb!
awesome love it
THANK YOU
brilliant !
Bloody brilliant! 😂😂😂
Brilliant
"Lock me in the cellar and feed me pins"
I don't understand why for so many years
no one posted all of Johnny's adventures in one video from the beginning to the end
Utter genius
BRILLIANT ;) hilarious
What’s for tea tonight mother? Shadows and lies… on toast? 😂😂😂😂
their here landed on the pier
Their hair, they're here, landed on the peer.
I think I met them somewhere in the cotswolds. Mad as a box of frogs
Just like your average daily mail or GB news reader, but with the word 'dinghies' instead.
I used to laugh at this but never fully understood it. Until a few years later I started to suffer from depression. Not something I get much now I have found a cure....Grandchildren. Now I find it even funnier than before. The fast show was brilliant.
This is the best one...the lead up then....."black"
Ha Ha loved the fast show
Ahead of its time
How everyone reacts to the mention of Brexit.
Tapor E but only because it's even crazier than him :-D
Everyone or just remoaners?
@@footielad8301 Thank you for proving the point
1:01 LOL
It’s on my YT feed yet again… and of course I had to watch it and still find as funny as ever. Did Charlie smd Arabella ad-lib this as it has that feel.
MY EYES R LIKE PIES
He sounds like Warwick Davis at 1:53.
They're here..they're here..🤣🤣
RIP this sketch