MY HUSBAND DOESN'T FIND ME ATTRACTIVE

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  • Опубликовано: 28 ноя 2024

Комментарии • 59

  • @hamidaalhassan9242
    @hamidaalhassan9242 10 месяцев назад +101

    May Allah protect our mouth from saying something painful to our spouses out of anger

    • @TheXs.Official
      @TheXs.Official  10 месяцев назад +4

      Ameen ameen 🤲🤲

    • @ayshasummer4113
      @ayshasummer4113 10 месяцев назад

      Ameen

    • @fahadmalik8862
      @fahadmalik8862 7 месяцев назад

      ​@@TheXs.Official I am well adversed in all topics. Scholar or no scholar.
      Men - Men = Trust. Men hold trust as a major factor in relations between each other. Majority of reactions amongst men hold in superficial gains of interest {material based}.
      Men - Women = Reliance. In succeeded independence of activities around environment's that are dependent on singular strengths.
      Women - Women = acceptance from women is one thing women crave and it often comes from leveraging others.
      Women have said they thrive off third person perceptives in watching themselves hence majority of modeling agencies, beauty salons. Small percentage is their own interest the rest is the attention and conversations between other women. That's my view.
      Try me on any topic. You are a hypocrite.
      Female scholars have been prevalent since Prophet Muhammad (S.A.W) time. Who do you think is one of the most acknolged scholars? Aisha (R.A.D.W.N.A). As expected throwing accusations where they weren't any to beigin with. In terms of sensitivite topics. Women have always talked regarding it. Men have not been "a peddling sectarian sexist belief" when you said about qur'anic ruling and guidelines but then said "yada yada" not even aware of what they are.
      You are a thug. But thats expected from the same contradictive South Asian man with your upbringing, your behaviour. A mouth piece. You do realise there are loads of Muslim female scholars who would disagree with you on that point .
      "
      and do you not think women need women
      19:36
      teachers and other women to relate to do
      19:38
      you not think you think women want to
      19:40
      hear all of the stories about how to
      19:42
      navigate their life from men who have
      19:44
      been only are pedling sectarian sexist
      19:47
      beliefs okay about do this do this do
      19:49
      this do this do this on mass seeing it
      19:52
      with their chest the things aren't even
      19:54
      true to begin with anyway and they're
      19:56
      just saying it from this male caveman
      19:58
      narrative do do women not need to hear
      20:01
      stories from other women do women not
      20:03
      need to relate to other women do we not"
      "Haram it's Haram but just when you don't
      21:22
      understand what's Haram you can't say"
      "21:45
      Muslims are becoming stupid okay I feel"
      "22:30
      words and the reputation of the Prophet
      22:33
      sallallahu alhi wasallam by pedaling"
      You conducted pre-marital relations.
      Courting is an decades old tradition upon without the parents guidelines and was later used in social uproars in streamlining the permission in culture.
      Just another hypocritical thug who neglects his own "you not think you think women want to hear all of the stories about how to navigate their life from men who have been only are peddling sectarian sexist beliefs". Try again. Let me tell you one source I have used before muftiwpDOTgov it is a well reputable source. You on the other hand haven't quoted your sources not even once. I can refute any topic you bring. Try it. You are under the mentally of 'being different from amongst the population of men' in which of seeing the social impact compounded by women within areas. In fear of that.
      Nothing separates you from Khalid. I document social development and cover all topics etc/ Psychology, philosophy, science etc. Scholarly materials and outside sources.

  • @executivprincess
    @executivprincess 10 месяцев назад +23

    26 mins onwards...Not Sufian throwing Amara under the bus!LOL... I am a Christian and your discussion about this issue was on point. Atrraction goes beyond physical looks, true beauty is from within and marriage requires work from both parties!. Love your channel!xx

    • @TheXs.Official
      @TheXs.Official  9 месяцев назад

      ♥️♥️♥️

    • @WhoWellOk
      @WhoWellOk 9 месяцев назад

      Lies lol people don't look at personality when looking at someone they look for physical

  • @mustafasolmaz5946
    @mustafasolmaz5946 9 месяцев назад +2

    easy answer. just start working out regularly and hard and be disciplined. your body will start changing withing weeks if you do it properly. at the beginning working out is enough, after getting used to it you can start eating the right foods and low carb. the beginning is a difficult process, but you´ll enjoy the shower afterwards like nothing else. and it makes you feel good and your self confidence skyrockets. and your daily activities will get less difficult

  • @timothyjackson1779
    @timothyjackson1779 9 месяцев назад +5

    I think this had a positive end. She asked, He answered. She heard him and addressed it and got the change she wanted. I think you have to be sensitive to your wife's feelings but there is no perfect way to verbally tell someone that you are not attracted or disappointed in their appearance. It is not something that is easy to hear. So, kudos to her for being able to swallow a hard pill. And we know what he meant because she shared it but we don't know how exactly he said it. I think there are abrasive ways to say it but no perfect way to say it that is truly clear. The funny thing is she never said in the post "he finds me unattractive." It's just what's inferred.

  • @fungab1446
    @fungab1446 10 месяцев назад +11

    First here. To comment as well❤️ I hope to get married soon In Sha Allah. And I may name my children after one of you

    • @TheXs.Official
      @TheXs.Official  10 месяцев назад

      Ameen ♥️🤲 & aww that is so sweet!

  • @translate910
    @translate910 8 месяцев назад +1

    in order for you to request certain things from your wife, you FIRST need to fulfill them yourself

  • @shahnazwillis3931
    @shahnazwillis3931 10 месяцев назад +2

    That was a nice reminder to all husbands and wify'y. Do not provoke.
    All Muslims men and women should attend marriage classes. Its so important really.

  • @winona43xp
    @winona43xp 10 месяцев назад +8

    It's a wrap he said what he ment. That's a terrible feeling to have.

    • @TheXs.Official
      @TheXs.Official  10 месяцев назад +1

      Such a savage feeling to have 😭

  • @rahmahomale5351
    @rahmahomale5351 10 месяцев назад +8

    One should make the best out of what they have. My husband is my stylist. He buys what he thinks he wants me to wear or look like.

    • @TheXs.Official
      @TheXs.Official  10 месяцев назад +2

      That's so sweet!

    • @soniad556
      @soniad556 9 месяцев назад +1

      Is it though? I wouldn’t want anyone dressing me. I’m a grown woman I can make my own choices. I would be very annoyed!

  • @zubeensyed3855
    @zubeensyed3855 10 месяцев назад +2

    Amara, Anjelina Jolie is divorced because she left her abuser, who not only physically abused her but also assaulted her son Maddox. She is a beautiful woman and also a strong woman to show women deserve respect and love. Treat her like a queen or be prepared to see her leave!!!!
    Adding to that i really enjoy hearing your perspective Amara and I think it would be nice to see a solo girl chat video. ❤

    • @piqueny8872
      @piqueny8872 9 месяцев назад

      She had a double mastectomy her ex prob didn’t find her attractive anymore
      Some men want the Kardashian’s look wife yet dress like a manchild
      T-shirt sweatpants sneakers and think they’re the shizz

  • @S4FX
    @S4FX 9 месяцев назад +1

    May Allah swt make it easy and make our spouses the coolness of our eyes and the peace to our hearts ❤ Ameen 🤲

  • @bloombloom3036
    @bloombloom3036 10 месяцев назад +3

    Can you guys talk about whether its okay to be vulnerable or cry in front of your wife? ❤

    • @bless4999
      @bless4999 9 месяцев назад +1

      Probably not a good idea

    • @xxshadowhunter1068
      @xxshadowhunter1068 9 месяцев назад +4

      Of course it's ok. If she's a good woman who cares about you and sticks by you when things get hard, she'll be there for you. it's completely fine.

    • @talstoic
      @talstoic 9 месяцев назад

      short answer no. only really cry when family dies or something tragic happens. but don't start wallowing in front of your wife. as a guy you've got to be the ground she stands on - if its rocky or shaky she isn't gonna feel secure in you as a husband

  • @lisagab
    @lisagab 10 месяцев назад +5

    Hi tall building and sand storm 😊. We need to chose our words wisely. Instead of saying i don't find you attractive, why not tell wife/husband what they are doing that you find unattractive. Somethings are harder to change, like a hair style that's easy, to lose weight not so much and can lead to low self esteem. So offer to workout together or start eating healthy things together.

    • @TheXs.Official
      @TheXs.Official  10 месяцев назад +2

      Hi Ms Lisa, totally agree. ♥️ Well said. Words matter and we should be so gentle with our spouses especially. Doing things together to work towards goals IS so much better! Xx

  • @lilacblue783
    @lilacblue783 9 месяцев назад

    I think if the husband is making an effort to look good i think the wife should also make an effort. Thats marriage. Both need to make an effort

  • @piqueny8872
    @piqueny8872 9 месяцев назад +1

    If the Husband makes the effort the wife will follow hopefully to dress more presentable
    Bro in law dresses like a teenager T-shirt sneakers sweatpants the audacity expect his wife to look like a movie actress he sees 24/7!
    during labour told her she needs to lose weight
    Yet refuses to get a vasectomy and her birth control pill Make her gain weight
    Like manchild she can not win

  • @SikandarKhan-mf5pz
    @SikandarKhan-mf5pz 9 месяцев назад

    Spouse needs to understand that few years after marriage couples body changes after giving birth.

  • @monicamacneille3372
    @monicamacneille3372 10 месяцев назад +3

    EDIT: I've removed my comment, as I don't think the way I worded it was particularly helpful.

    • @TheXs.Official
      @TheXs.Official  10 месяцев назад +15

      My Islamic view is that it is a massive sin to even utter such a phrase to your wife and once someone has, it’s game over. I stated that clearly. I don’t have an obsession with weight. The comments we read, and the responses, mentioned wives after having children and their struggles balancing being a wife and being a mother. Amongst those factors was weight. Amara will tell you herself that I have not once spoken about post-baby weight to her in a negative manner. She felt a way about it, and I supported her in getting back to where she wanted to be. Also, as her husband, I wanted her to get back to feeling as good as she can. For both of us. The fact that I can say in a video what the quiet voice inside me wanted, does not mean I screamed that out at any point along the way. We spoke about such things before marriage, and now it happens to be after the fact. So both are harmless. That is actually maturity. Two adults being able to speak openly about what they want and where they want to be. I’ve said in other videos that I would NEVER leave my wife for such things, but inside, I’d like her to get back to feeling good, and that requires her to work towards that outcome.
      As for the “sick wife”. I also mentioned a sick husband and the struggle with being married to someone who you now have to care for for the rest of both of your lives, be that early into the marriage or later. May Allah protect us all. I know this situation personally and have heard the accounts of both individuals for several years. It’s not as clear as ‘you stay with your spouse forever, regardless’. It is much more complex. I am commenting on a situation after hearing other people’s perspectives, and being empathetic. The reality is that the dynamic changes and depending on the extremity of the situation, the impact can be huge. I didn’t say, “no sex = no marriage”. I speak of loneliness, turning from a spouse into a carer, personalities changing, roles changing. Although it is extremely difficult, people are allowed to leave. It may be horrible from the outside, looking in, but they can. For their own happiness, which will no doubt be coupled with extreme sadness. It’s not haram. However, I clearly stated that there was a far superior option, which was to stay with your spouse. For love, for religion, for honour. That’s obviously my view, but I reserve judgement for those who decide otherwise.
      Life isn’t just about pretending there are no real decisions and suppressing everything you feel because someone else may say or feel something. Marriage requires open discourse and the way to keep each other happy is by being gentle, loving, loyal, and being able to speak openly about what you want. You both keep each other happy.

    • @yordantv9322
      @yordantv9322 10 месяцев назад +8

      Dang Monica,.. I got none of that from the video 😅 idk where you got all this from. I even went back and watched the whole video again. I can’t even comment on any specific thing you mentioned, because the more I read, the more I was confused as to how you got all this info from the video. Anyways I don’t think threats of unsubscribing is very mature. I wouldn’t want the X’s to give opinions that are not based on what they truly see, or believe, because they are worried about what their viewers will say.. sooo not cool man.
      May Allah bless us all 🙏🏽

    • @TheXs.Official
      @TheXs.Official  10 месяцев назад +18

      Salaam sis ♥️ Sufyan has already responded but I want to say some things regarding my weight.
      It's very tricky to discuss weight on a platform like this as it can be a triggering topic (understandably) so takes a lot of thought and careful navigation. I'm making a video soon on it, but understand that I was very, very low for months because I had gained a considerable amount of weight after Amaya (nearly 4 stone). It wasn't normal pregnancy weight. It was important and exciting to me to have a fit pregnancy, but I ended up bed-bound/ immobile at the end. After Amaya was born, she was super ill, I lived off lactation cookies to get by and ended up going up and up in weight. I was confused, didn't understand at the time and was really upset. This frustration I had probably affected every relationship in my life, including my marriage, but most especially my relationship with myself. I didn't feel good and I didn't feel like myself. It felt like I had no control over my body anymore, which was really depressing. Sufyan is always very loving and positive mA, but was especially so at this time. I told him I wanted to feel strong again in my body and look closer to how I did before. He heard me but encouraged me to wait until my body felt ready, said that there was no rush and that I looked beautiful as I was.
      It's been nearly a year now, I've put in graft 😅 there have been dips and plateaus and a lot of emotions, but never any pressure. This man has honestly been my biggest cheerleader. I was lost and low, I told him what I needed to do for myself to be happy, and he has spent everyday since listening to me and supporting me through it in any way he can. He's been constantly picking me up after every fall and carrying me over every hurdle, praising me and feeding positivity into me. I don't think any person could or would do more for my happiness day in day out than Sufyan does. Alhamdulilah. 🤲🌸
      Your message came from a place of love and protection, and I appreciate that, but the conclusions you have drawn are so incorrect. Xx

    • @monicamacneille3372
      @monicamacneille3372 9 месяцев назад +3

      @@TheXs.Official Thank you both for responding, I was really hoping you would! Having been in a very unhealthy abusive marriage, I am probably too quick to react. You are right Amara, it came from a place of love and protection. I love your channel because you are so kind and loving, and so I was horrified to think that maybe things were a bit off. I think maybe when a video is edited it can come across a different way than it was intended? Then again, the other viewer implied I was the only one who felt this way. Regardless, I'm so happy you guys are in good communication, and sorry I was so quick to react so strongly. I have really enjoyed following your channel, and will continue to follow and share with my friends. I have told so many people about your channel! I will edit my original post to take out the unsubscribing bit. Again, thank you so much for your kindness in your responses.

    • @monicamacneille3372
      @monicamacneille3372 9 месяцев назад +3

      @@yordantv9322 I was definitely feeling super defensive of Amara, and have removed my comment about unsubscribing. I am quite a bit older than Sufyan and Amara, and probably yourself, so I know a thing or two about life and unhealthy marriages. I worry that women in religious marriages get the short end of the stick, and many men use religion as an excuse to abuse their wives. Having been in a very abusive relationship when I was young, I am immediately protective of women who may be in a situation similar to the one I was in.

  • @nadia.c5
    @nadia.c5 9 месяцев назад +1

    amazing video as usual. Great advice given. Amara you are so lucky. May Allah give all us women a Sufyan.

    • @TheXs.Official
      @TheXs.Official  9 месяцев назад +3

      Thanks sis ♥️ alhamdulilah he is a very good man. May Allah SWT give us and make us the best of spouses 🤲

  • @Al-Aswad789
    @Al-Aswad789 10 месяцев назад +3

    Assalam aleikum The X’s, ❤

  • @natnat_o3
    @natnat_o3 6 месяцев назад

    How can you just leave your spouse if they're ill and need support physically and mentally, that's cruel because you should be supporting them through that as their family/partner I love you guys but I totally don't agree with that take marriage is a two person commitment

  • @lisagab
    @lisagab 10 месяцев назад +2

    To say that you are not attractive to your wife anymore, now a days just means you are ready to move on to another😢.

    • @TheXs.Official
      @TheXs.Official  10 месяцев назад +1

      Where do you even go from there? :( very tough situation

    • @lisagab
      @lisagab 10 месяцев назад +2

      @TheXs.Official it takes a strong person to move on from this. That's why it's so important to know how to love yourself and have faith that God is there to take you out of all storms.

  • @cahaya9778
    @cahaya9778 9 месяцев назад

    😂😂😂 Why the heck she think like that.. Man are simple...
    Girl take care your self to not makeup but be as good as you younger..

  • @usainbolt5153
    @usainbolt5153 9 месяцев назад +2

    @11:01 we men are used to being seen as unatractive is normal but when it happens to a woman her whole world come crushing down even this woman here feels her pain 😂😂😂
    Welcome to.a mans world

    • @thefeminineeye
      @thefeminineeye 9 месяцев назад +1

      Women are judge more by app😮

    • @WhoWellOk
      @WhoWellOk 9 месяцев назад

      ​@@thefeminineeyefalse both are

    • @thefeminineeye
      @thefeminineeye 9 месяцев назад +1

      @@WhoWellOk both are but women are judged More for that than other things

  • @yasmin-wg2fs
    @yasmin-wg2fs 10 месяцев назад +3

    Fear Allah swt don't disclose anyone's personal questions...Its going to go against you on the day of judgement...ANY ONE'S BUSINESS IS NOT A TRUE MUSLIMS BUSINESS...even if some stupid person posts you Question make it clear your not going to talking about anyone...ASTAGHFAR ALWAYS

  • @chrbx13
    @chrbx13 10 месяцев назад

    Whose this woman on ig