Anyone else think the dad in the first story killed the mom in order to be with the second wife? She had an alergic reaction that killed her while out on a dinner celebrating the dad. Would have been really easy to tamper with her food. He had the second woman waiting in the wings.
@@classicrockkid345 and it sounds like there was no investigation. the interaction of the dad has me wanting the police to investigate. the dads reaction is of a man that checked out of the marriage long ago....
No I can't believe it, I do believe he was CHEATING on OP mother, but tampering her food I don't believe! He just wants OP to ACCEPT his wife so he can ERASE the fact he's a cheating scumbag and for her that "she is and ALWAYS WILL BE THE OTHER WOMAN WHO STOLE TRASH And her obsession with OP is because she KNOWS she stole trash and cannot feel COMPLETE unless she steals OP from his mother! Thing is she went about it in the most LAZY way possible trying to use FORCE and yeah I laughed too when OP showed her the COPIES of those photos she thought she destroyed! She believed with NOTHING, OP would have to focus on her, even if it was hate that she hoped would be LOVE eventually! But no OP cemented that she FAILED and will ALWAYS be a homewrecker living with TRASH! She can lie and tell herself OP father is a catch, but his behavior, attidute and actions show him as Trash and that will ALWAYS be in the back of her mind! And the fact all this time and NO KID! Makes it clear OP was meant to BE HERS in her mind! This is reminding me ALOT of the OP who was being harassed by his Sperm Donor and her Boundary violating Wife who did the same shit that happened here! He distance himself and JUST as he married and had a kid, they cam back in EXPECTING to be GRANDPARENTS, Especially the Not right in the head Homewrecker because sadly his wife's sister's POS husband in a MOVE thinking he could FIX his own marriage via this. Found out about OP "Sperm Donor and STEPHomewrecker when OP mentioned his past one drunk night that was SAID IN CONFIDENCE it would never be brought up again! LOOKED for them! Then when everyone in the family were wondering HOW they found out about OP and his family! His only excuse when caught was "We need more family!" As said, He and SIL were already on the rocks and he wasn't a good person! OP got a Restraining order! But the POS moved to a House NEAR where his new home was so now he HAS to deal with them trying to Boundary push again! And we know the OBSESSED check the dates on those orders as they INSTANTLY get back to STALKING/HARASSING the VERY SECOND the Order expires!
Umm excuse me? Mom died at a celebration dinner for the dad, because of an allergy… and then 6 WEEKS later, mom’s stuff is at the dump and new wife moved in? Yeah, something is more than suspicious about that ..
@Clyde-S-Wilcox you grow up, allergies are rarely an accident. It's either negligence on the part of the restaurant for not checking their dishes (assuming mom told them) or its intentional (dad didn't tell them anything. If I wanted to off my fiance for any reason all I'd have to do was slip some worstishire in his food at a restaurant. It would honestly be comically easy to kill somone with an allergy, and why didn't she have an epi-pen. Did someone remove it or forget it.
I'm still waiting for a reason why he shouldn't have been blunt in his rejection. She hurt him all through college, but now that he's "good enough" she deigns to give him attention, but he should just suck it up because HER feeeelings? I've always believed turning the other cheek just leaves you with both sides of your face slapped.
“Mom died of an allergic reaction during a celebratory dinner”… anyone wanna take bets that Dad “arranged” for the deadly allergen “accidentally” being present in Mom’s food, so that he could be with the new woman?
Y’all beat me to the punch! Everything about OPs “dad” and do over wife scream sus. And I’m also betting OPs mom’s jewelry and other valuables weren’t trashed but sold to use to pamper the entitled princess. OPs doing the right thing by getting his revenge through living his best life away from them.
@@aindrilaroy4464 I think most of us were thinking foul play, or at least taking advantage that he didn't have to hide his mistress anymore. Or he dealt with his grief in a terrible way and was trying to fill the void with another person/relationship. There's a reason most grief councilors heavily recommend waiting until after the first anniversary of a significant other's passing to attempt to start dating again.
Mother replaced by evil stepmom story: OP, are you sure your father did NOT arrange for your mother's allergic reacting and cause her death. That certainly fits the rest of the story.
Can't believe he would murder OP mother, I DO believe he would CHEAT on her and was likely ready to leave her and OP till that incident happened, making it ALL THE MORE easier for him! He's only bothering his son because he DARED to make his Living Sex Doll Cry like OP should give a damn (talk about obsessed that he would call from an Unknown number just to flying Monkey his own son! What a POS this man!)
thats exactly what im thinking, the fact OP has no half-siblings is also something i didnt miss. so dad was cheating with this woman who maybe cant have kids, he just so happens to have a child but also has a wife, doesnt want to get a divorce, lose money, lose any custody of this child he wants to give to the new woman, ends the wife. throwing everything of the wifes away was just twisting the knife, it also showed he didnt care about her in the slightest.
Maybe i have seen too many true crime but could the dad put something in knowing her allergies in hopes to get ride of the problem. 4months and he got a woman i bet he already had one before mom passed. The way sperm donor took a bulldoser to all of ops moms things and memories as soon as the dirt is on her casket makes me think like this.
@Wander85942 I'm inclined to believe it was murder. Mostly because a person with such a serious allergy would be prepared and have a game plan. Like, did she not have an epipen? Where they so far from a hospital that they couldn't go there? He would have sued the hell out of the restaurant for messing up. Because surely, she would triple check that they have a safe space to make her food free of allergen. None of this seemed to happen. He swept it under the rug as if nothing happened.
Agreed! 6 WEEKS?!! They were definitely having an affair. And they're total psychos for STILL harassing OP over that stupid gd photo album SM made! This makes me so freaking angry, that it makes me wish I was an assassin. I'd offer OP my services, pro bono.✌️😂
The "OP hasn't changed or matured if he's still holding a grudge for his bully" comment comes from a former bully, or at least, someone who's never been bullied. OP gave her the same energy she dished out, and she deserved it.
These people really did not read the story and are just making excuses to vilify OP it’s pathetic. And please tell me how does this girl deserve any sympathy whatsoever when she shown nothing but disrespect. Do these people not know that respect is a two-way street. Let me guess she’s a girl so she deserves sympathy, right?
And if she has poor self esteem, that’s a her problem. She didn’t care about OPs self esteem when she brutally rejected him. Did these friends help pick OP up after the rejection like some of the friends did with her?
Yep, I love these "High Horse assholes" who think they have a right to judge ANYONE! Especially if their Former Bullies who likely are now in that POSITION their victims SAID they'd end up, but they laughed and saw it as "loser talk" till now their IN that position and expect forgiveness! And it's WORSE from the ones who were never bullied who'd I suspect saw someone getting bullied, but in FEAR of being bullied themselves, they left that person to their fate and are FEARFUL of "Immature Victims coming back on THEM for being an ALLY of the bully by abandoning them" or "Thinking their HELPING a victim by telling them to be a Bigger Person when all their doing is showing how HORRID they are compared to the bullies by not going back to MINDING their own business like they did before! Love how they condemn the victim, but none of that was around for the Bullies!
RE: The Village Bicycle Every one of those YTA comments are from a person who has NEVER suffered at the hands (or words) of a Bully - Zero Doubt in my mind. They are also the people who will speak volumes on Empathy without ever having a concept as to what the word really means.
They are also lying. They probably chewed out the last person that disrespected their thought bubble mood or whatever minor infraction was super important to them at the time. Nothing like being tornented for years by someone who knows how to hurt you.
The double standard on Story 3, it okay for a woman to be mean girl to an overweight man, but once he works out to be better and fires back at her is wrong?
@@uwetheiss970 Talkin about dumb! Something wrong with your eyes? My comment says NOTHING about WHO can post on Reddit (besides that YOU are wrong as you have to have an account /sign up to be able to post..so that is a 'dumb' remark) 2nd My comment OBVIOUS to anyone but you,. ofc only aplies to ppl that fit the "OP is TA for sayinbg this" group! So before calling ppl '\ dumb' always double check if you are not saying something stupid yourself" Got it kid?
And such an allergy with no epipen or some other safety measures? Top it off with "moving on" with someone else in 6 weeks and married months later? You'd be an idiot to *not* think it a conspiracy.
The man who dressed down that wonan is not the idiot... might not have been necessary, but he's not an idiot... she bullied him, he replied... screw all the YTA commenters
He's an insecure aole who has been practicing that little speech for years. He is just supremely jealous HE couldn't be the town bicycle himself because he couldn't get ANY girl, not just this one. Why does he think he shoild have been able to have sex with her just because other guys did? He is still a loser.
I have a feeling the poster that was against him, was the village bicycle and has a history of being a bully. Anyone who's ever been bullied, is cheering.
Sorry but Opie is not the a-hole for calling a bicycle a bicycle considering she continuously disrespected him for a long period of time and only changed because he got fit.
Can’t really say that she even changed. She saw a guy she wanted to sink her teeth into and went after him. She’s just boo hooing because OP turned her down and now she has to stay there instead of travel abroad with OP.
@@notevenlistening6072 I don't think so. She went out of her way to bully this guy. An apology isn't worth diddly squat IMO. Sure she might have "matured" or changed, but you have to work for forgiveness. If I were OP I would trust the offer of friendship had she made it, the same way he didn't trust her newfound friendliness.
@ynmonroe She definitely wouldn't be owed anything even if she had somehow turned over a new leaf. At least I could feel neutral about her rather than feeling disgusted, as it is
@@GreenKnight1982 and she didn’t really change. She wanted to use a guy to boost her self esteem only for her past actions with OP to take its toll. Guess she was also hoping to travel abroad with OP.
I cannot get over the YTA On the fat guy post. So she gets to harrass him for his weight, but when he mentions her promiscuity once, he's the issue? Be for real.
Yep, like always there's a bunch of "be the bigger person", "don't say anything nasty because you're an ahole if you do" and a bunch of other pretend outrage over supposed moral high ground 🙄
@buckeyenative1365 eh, Reddit hates slut shaming. (Maybe it's a little too personal for a lot of them) That's all this is. If he had insulted her another way I have no doubt these same commenters would totally be on board.
And it didn’t sound like she even apologized. Plus this friend was already a train wreck hence her going through guys like tissues during allergy season.
And how “adorable” sister is acting like her moving in with OP is her being altruistic. She’s a cautionary tale not a role model. The fact that she also brings this up when OPs wife isn’t around is also telling.
Also she was not in the least bit well intentioned. She's trying to be a replacement mommy to OPs kids in exchange for a roof over her head. She's the type to be pressuring OP's children into calling her mom
Mom died of an allergic reaction? Anyone else think that the dad had the woman waiting in the wings and decided to take advantage of his wife's allergy instead of getting a divorce?
Yeah I didn’t agree with the YTA commenters especially when they assumed she used her spouse’s money to buy the purse. She just said that he makes more than her. I do hope OP looks into another playdate group
No one buys a designer bag for the looks. They’re ugly with designer initials on them. It’s all vanity. OP was showing off buying an expensive bag for a 6 yo, who has nothing to put in it and will lose it soon enough. The cult of celebrity digs in deep.
If you spend $2000 on something that you know will be lost, YTA. You are literally throwing money away. $2000 could save someone's life and you are literally throwing it in the trash. That makes someone a bad person
Story 2: Every kid in the group got a purse except OP'S daughter. This was mean girl behavior, parents edition. "Oh, OP can afford to buy her own purse for her daughter." Also, the one who did that became enraged when OP did just that. OP'S appropriate response should be "if you think your daughter's heartbroken that my kid has a special purse, imagine how heartbroken my kid was, being the only kid who was excluded. Next time you're splurging on group gifts, please include everyone."
@@psycojuggalo1642excluded by whom? It read as the older girls respective parents bought them purses. Not one parent bought purses for everyone but OPs child.
Your dad was cheating and now I'm suspicious about that allergic reaction. He didn't meet her six weeks later, move her in the next day, and get married five and a half months after your mother died because she was a stranger. No, he knew her very well. And I'm not joking, you might want to run that timeline past a homicide detective and see how they feel about it.
What hell is up with these people vilifying OP in the bicycle story, talk about terrible reading skills, where he pretty much gave her a very blunt rejection, he was not a jerk about it. I have seen similar stories like this were there was a girl bully in this path but then when they all grow up she suddenly wants to be interested in him. Respect is a two-way street why should someone give respect to a person who’s done nothing but give disrespect, what kind of freaking sense does that make? And I wish these people would stop with the be the bigger person which actually means be the bigger doormat? Really does prove how much this community does not know the true concept of be the bigger person.
“he was not a jerk about it”, he called her the village bicycle, how is that not a jerk? He doesn’t owe her kindness because of how she treated him in the past, but insulting her unnecessarily just causes issues. He could’ve rejected her, not insulted her, and moved on. He chose to be mean and start this issue. I get why, but he chose this life.
@@infinitetranquilo She slept with every guy in their friend group except for him all while openly mocking him about it in front of all their friends, so he wasn't wrong in calling her the village bicycle. The truth hurts. He was nicer about her gross double standards than I would have been. And it isn't just girls, guys are as much to blame for being man-wh0res. I think promiscuity is gross. Many people do. People should understand that we all have different ideas about, well, everything. If only she had been nicer about rejecting him all those years ago, I'm sure he would have been nicer with his own words. But "being the bigger" person is just allowing yourself to be walked over like a doormat. I would assume the only people that really have a problem with this scenario are people that acted the same way she did.
Story 5: NTA, she thinks she (the single mom who begs for money from everyone instead of working) is a "better influence" than your wife (a woman who works and provides)? That is just delusional.
Exactly. The sister should focus more on being a "better influence" for her own children. I suggest not hooking up with anymore deadbeats and having more children she can't afford.
She could at least show some respect and say that she wants to live in because times are tough for her. Instead she’s trying to play the angle that OP should be honored to have her living with him. No lady now it’s time to be quiet and start adulting.
And that would be a good time to teach that you can't always get everything and that other people's stuff have no bearing on what you can and can't get.
as a poor person who the fuck cares that a kid has an expensive purse. As a poor person you have to learn to not worry about what others have. If someone else wants to waste their money on something that is just not your problem.
Re: The Purse: NTA "Introduced status seeking?" Are these commenters for real? Status is derived from perceived value. The kids would always value something. And not everyone would be able to afford that something. I think the girl's peers need to introduce their kids to "Oh, it's nice she got a purse. No, you can't have that one. We can't always have the things we want, and that thing is a waste of money."
Imagine having all that money but you "can't" buy your kid nice things because it hurts other people's feelings. I totally think it's stupid to buy a fancy purse for a young kid. But, when you have a lot of money that purse is equivalent to splurging on that new $30 toy they don't need. She needs to associate with different types of people.
@@yamairad1 Agree with you that it's ridiculous for a kid. But it's not my kid, and it's not causing their family financial hardship, so I'm just going to shrug and let other people waste their money on what they want to wast their money on.
It is 100% the mothers being jealous. Their kids probably have very basic purses if they thing a designer bag is prettier. Most kid purses have unicorns, glitter, animals etc. No way would they like a brand bag more.
2nd story- If you have a problem with how a parent spends their money then perhaps they need to find a friend group in their monetary level. I dare anyone to mind my wallet while not contributing to it. The NERVE 😮😮😮
Yeah. I've got *relatives* all along the economic spectrum from lower to upper-middle. I went to a private school for the first few years of elementary because we're Catholic. A lot of other folks sent their kids there because it was the only private school in the area and it was a sign of wealth. I know the difference between simply having expensive things and being a dick about it. OP was *not* being a dick. The play date mom who got a purse for everyone except OP's daughter *was.*
@@TailsFan Lol. I'm not surprised. That's not to say she would never make a "surprise" popup somewhere but there would be a reason behind it and shopping isn't it.
That lady came in threw away all of OP's moms sentimental stuff who died months ago and then said she was "Excited to finally have a son". Lady basically just declared war as far as family relations go. Like any sort of a chance for positive relationship was dead the moment she did that.
6 weeks? Did his Dad know of her allergies? Freak accident… umm doesn’t sound like an accident to me… He married and tossed her stuff out.. He wanted her dead and gone entirely.. and it sounds like he got away with it!
Story 4: NTA, if a name upsets either parent for any legitimate reason, it should be and was vetoed. The trauma connection with a close family member definitely counts. Heck If I had a child I would veto any name that is 4 letters, because of my bad history with people that had 4 letter names and nicknames.
Last story, NTA for sure. She kept pushing, disrespected OP's answers, then his wife then went crying to mum and dad when she didn't get her way. Don't ask a question you don't want an answer to!
The photo album story: he moved on so fast bc he was already sleeping with her before the mom’s mysterious “freak accident”, there’s no way she didn’t announce her allergy before being served…
She chose to hit on the guy who had obviously was not interested. I think he had the right to sau something She might be down but he was affected for a long time.History cant be erased He didn't go on and on.
Maybe I've read too many of this type of story, but I'm wondering, what caused the allergic reaction? And was it really a freak accident? With the time line, can't help but think they were already in a relationship.
Story 1: NTA....Your father moved a new woman in 6 weeks after your mother died and married her withing 6 months? Either he was having an affair, or he went nuts and didn't get psychological help he so desperately needed (and still hasn't). Are you 100% sure you know the truth about your mother's death? Like did she end herself when she found out about the affair?
Is there anyone else concerned that the dad was seeing his current wife before the previous one died? That he was with the wife at a restaurant when she experienced a serious allergic reaction and for some reason didn't have an EpiPen that worked? This really sounds like he arranged his wife's death to make room for the new one...
New gf 6 weeks after the sudden death of his wife, and married 4 months later? I wouldn't be shocked to find out she was a LTAP and the wife's death was an answer to their prayers. Ugh.
@mogulmade Umm no he should have discussed this with her as soon as they got pregnant. Also what if the name Josephine held sentimental value to his wife. This is why communication is key in a marriage. Also if OP can use his family against his wife then his wife can do the same.
Was totally going to say that, I mean it was an “allergic reaction” I’m sure the husband knew about, then the “new wife” moves in weeks later. Yeah he was cheating at the very least
The only people that could move past their spouse suddenly dying during a celebratory dinner are the people that plotted that death to occur. Just saying, but every action of that father is highly suspicious.
Last story: OP's sister opened the discussion about moving in with OP by insulting his wife. He set her straight on a few of the finer points of her OWN character. OP is NTA.
1st Story: Not only agreeing with the consensus about OP's Mother and her suspicious passing...but we'll wager Mom's expensive items were sold (or kept by Stepmom), and OP was lied to about it.
Something very similar happened to my cousins. Their mother died of cancer and in a few weeks my, he moved her youngest sister in as his new love interest. He threw out all of my aunt’s things including all of the pictures of my cousins. He even gave her cherished T-bird to the new woman (also my biological aunt😡). My cousins were devastated by their mother’s death then traumatized by their father’s and aunt’s behavior. Neither cared about what my cousins were going through. It was all about them🤬
I really cannot stand Reddit commenters the story about the guy that got bullied by that chick who used to get some sort of Happiness from publicly shaming this guy and bullying him in their friend group all the sudden can't take it when it's thrown back at her and for those people saying it's horrible for him to kick her while she's down what about the several years she kicked him all the time him publicly
Meh, they are all terrible people, including OP. The girl is obviously the biggest idiot for being a bully, then the friends for assumedly not intervening when the bullying took place. But if what the girl did was bad, then OP calling her 'the village bicycle' was also bad. It's understandable, but 2 wrongs don't make a right. A simple "No thanks, I'm not interested" was all that was necessary.
@@SakariWolf13 - The thing with feeling ashamed is that you'll only feel ashamed if you agree with the person who tried to shame you. I'm gay, from Northern Ireland, and I had the entirety of Christianity trying to shame me, guess what they never actually did. Furthermore as an enormous gardening utensil, if you can't handle gardening utensil being your reputation the stop being a gardening utensil.
Story 4: OP is not the A-hole. She was never nice to him. You don't have to be nice to people who bullied you. She wouldn't ha cried if what he said wasn't true. She thought she'd make herself feel better by sleeping with someone who was beneath her and had always wanted her. She was crying because she couldn't even get him.
The baby name story. I whole heartedly agree that baby names need to be a two yes, one no thing. Und even if the OP's sister would give her blessing to use a name that is a known trigger for her. He is doing the right thing by saying no.
"The preteen years of living with them." HAHA🤣🤣🤣 It wasn't an individual's age: it was the number of years (7) that OP had lived with them. 🤣🤣🤣🤣 Too much XO.
For story 2: why buy a child a designer bag? If OP has a few then why not give her daughter one she wasn’t using a lot? Daughter gets a fancy bag and OP save money and face. Or how about go to a local store with the kid and ask her what bag she would like?
She can afford it. It doesn't matter if her daughter uses it to ferry rocks and soil. Mommy wanted to be matchy matchy with her and mommy only uses designer bags and even better, mommy can afford said designer bag
He has to say to wife there is extraordinary horrific trauma sis suffered under her birth name. Its not my place to discuss, but if Id, youd beg me for forgiveness. Its off the table.
Sorry but story 1 sounds like dad “accidentally” helped OP’s mom die and then “magically” met his new wife (probably affair partner) and removed any hint of OP’s mom. That’s evil on another level.
6 weeks? OP's mother's funeral was barely over. Then a strange woman walks in and cleans out all her mother's stuff, with her father helping? Dad obviously the perpetrator of the "allergic reaction". Wonder if there was a life insurance policy involved? and if so, AP should be watching her own back......It's a great pity OP didn't keep that photo album. It may have come in handy to investigate for any clues. Look, even if poor OP's mother's death was a tragic "no one could have done anything" accident, what kind of sociopath moves in another woman in six weeks, and dumps all the memories of a 10 year old child's mother??
‘Village bicycle’ aw! Op said one nasty thing vs multiple years of nasty things every time he went out with friends. And bully girl only wanted to sleep with him because he’d shaped up to her liking. Sounds like she hadn’t changed a bit.
Story1: NTA and I think it is extremely suspicious that the father moved on so quickly. I see I'm not the only one who wonders if someone (the dad maybe) gave OP's mom a little "help" in having an allergic reaction to something. I highly suspect OP's dad was already seeing the stepmom at the very least. I'm too untrusting to think this was just an accident. A person who feels guilty would want to erase any memory of the person they killed, IMO. OP needs to stay away from them and hope he doesn't have any allergies.
St 1: I think stepmother was dad's secret mistress. That's why he married her so quickly. Last 1: Sister sounds like she would try to disrespect OP's wife and make a power move on her as "Woman of the house".
Last story: yeah I agree with that last commenter. Setting aside her circumstances, she has expressed disapproval of how OP's wife works and is making comments about how she would make a good role model for OP's kids. Sorry but with an attitude like that it would be a hard pass for me. I can just see it now, shortly after she moves in, OP will notice his kids being withdrawn and distant from their mother because auntie is whispering in their ears about how much of a bad mom she is. Nip that nonsense in the bud.
@@velvety2006 I believe there's a saying that it's easy to be generous with someone else's money, time, space and sanity. They probably have their own reasons, some may be valid like they live too far or the literally don't have the space.
Story three NTA! Why would any man want to ride the town bike? Good on OP for standing up for himself! What I find interesting is that all of the women in OP social circle are standing behind a woman who was willing to sleep with men who were in relationships. That says something about the women OP associates with!
On no planet do i believe that one: dad loved mom, two: dad loved the op, three: dad remained faithful to mom Getting married 6 weeks after the sudden, tragic death of your beloved wife, while grieving your loss, and while helping your young child navigate losing their mom? Yeah, no. Did dad get married that fast? Yes. Did he love his dead wife? Not believable.
Story 1: NTA. Dad was likely already having an affair with the second wife, hence why he was so quick to move on and erase OP's mother out of existence. I'd even question if he had a hand in her death considering how odd it was and he would've known about any allergies she had.
So her life strategy is to break up relationships but she thought you owed her, what? Has she changed her ways or is she still boinking other women's boyfriends/husbands
Story 1... Dad is angry saying OP was acting "Spitefully". OP asks: "Was I acting spitefully?". Yes OP you were and, GOOD FOR YOU!!! Be spiteful! Your father and his wife earned this and more! Your mother died tragically and your father immediately brought in a replacement wife and they did their best to completely erase any memory and physical evidence of her from your life and everyone else's life. They are disgusting and horrible people.
Story 1 - Six weeks after op's mom's death? Yeah. I don't blame other people for thinking the dad had a part in killing op's mom. Even if he wasn't responsible he was definitely cheating on her. NTA. Op did himself a favor getting away from these psychos. Story 2 - I don't understand having to pander to someone's delicate ego if they can't handle being around someone better off financially than they are. I'm on the fence on this one. I only agree it's a really bad idea to gift a 6 year old something so expensive before she even understands the value working for your money. Story 3 - NTA are people really serious right now? It's okay for her to bully op but op has to consider her poor feefees? If she's going to sleep around with lots and lots of guys she needs to be really tough about the fact people will think she has no self respect for herself or her body. Op called a spade a spade. Story 4 - NTA. Frankly it doesn't sound like op's wife is on board with supporting op's side why they can't name their daughter that particular name. Story 5 - Again with the whole "she got pregnant and never finished school". Of course op's sister's life is a mess now. Screw her feelings. She made a really dumb decision not to marry the guy. She could have tried to get alimony. NTA. If op lets this mooch into the house she will never leave and her kids will make it miserable for op's kids to live at their own house. Even if op had no kids I would still say don't do it. The family can accommodate the loser if they're so concerned about her and her kids.
hate me - but I am on the side of the designer bag mom. Her girl wanted a bag. Not necessarily a designer one, but a bag that matched one of mom. So she bought a bag fit for her child - and one for herself. She herself is into the designer stuff - she must have brought designer things into the play group before, just not for her kid or not such obvious ones. But it is down to kid wanting to be like mom. NTA
The weight loss story: NTA. Girl used OP as a way to make herself feel better and then when OP was suddenly up to her standards he was worth it. All he did was return fire once he got to a good vantage point.
I always feel weird about taking revenge. Even if it’s just mixing words. I’ve always thought that it’s better to move along leaving good feelings rather than bad ones. It’s hurts a lot more knowing you were terrible to someone who could still treat you so well. When you’re a jerk it only reinforces those bad feelings.
My dad pasted qhen I was 10, it crush all of us. My mom slowly got rid of things that dad had, he was a hoarder, but she never could let go of his flannels. When I was in my late 20's mom went on vacation with my uncle, I spoke to my siblings and we took 4 flannels and made them into teddy bears, a nickname for my dad, I gave 1 to mom she cried tears of joy, as she got grandkids we turned all the flannels into bears. When she pasted I put her bear with her. This is how u preserve a memory and love of family. Not dumping it in the trash.
Bicycle story. Only on Reddit can someone be body shamed for literally a decade.Have one insult retort and be told how awful they are. Also a general rule of life is if you're going to be ashamed of someone calling you out in your behavior then you shouldn't do that behavior
Jealous over a bag Who even notices anyones bags? As long as you werent bragging NTI. Other people who see someone has something and snipes about it is igit.
How long should a person hold on to anger and yall won’t blame them. In story #3 OP had a crush on someone who bullied him cause he was overweight… 3 years later after losing weight and being in a better mental space he’s flirted with by his bully, he embarrasses her privately after years of public humiliation and somehow he’s told to rise above it! Be the better person? That’s stupid! “I’m not the better person, I Match energies!” If you felt powerful enough to to bully me at my lowest, be prepared for my response when the tables turn… OP you are NTA!!!
17:05 how does OP’s wife feel on knowing her sister in law is judging her for providing for her family?? Sil was being judgmental and trying to take over her brother’s kids like they don’t have a mother. Sounds a lot like pot calling the kettle black.
You are so much better than the village bicycle. After all you were madly in love with her and still call her a friend despite all the "torment" You went through
Anyone else think the dad in the first story killed the mom in order to be with the second wife? She had an alergic reaction that killed her while out on a dinner celebrating the dad. Would have been really easy to tamper with her food. He had the second woman waiting in the wings.
I was just going to comment this. Really sus, that stepmother was an affair partner.
Okay, calm down Lifetime. There's literally no evidence of the sorts. Maybe stop watching Lifetime movies.
@@classicrockkid345 and it sounds like there was no investigation. the interaction of the dad has me wanting the police to investigate. the dads reaction is of a man that checked out of the marriage long ago....
No I can't believe it, I do believe he was CHEATING on OP mother, but tampering her food I don't believe! He just wants OP to ACCEPT his wife so he can ERASE the fact he's a cheating scumbag and for her that "she is and ALWAYS WILL BE THE OTHER WOMAN WHO STOLE TRASH And her obsession with OP is because she KNOWS she stole trash and cannot feel COMPLETE unless she steals OP from his mother! Thing is she went about it in the most LAZY way possible trying to use FORCE and yeah I laughed too when OP showed her the COPIES of those photos she thought she destroyed! She believed with NOTHING, OP would have to focus on her, even if it was hate that she hoped would be LOVE eventually! But no OP cemented that she FAILED and will ALWAYS be a homewrecker living with TRASH! She can lie and tell herself OP father is a catch, but his behavior, attidute and actions show him as Trash and that will ALWAYS be in the back of her mind! And the fact all this time and NO KID! Makes it clear OP was meant to BE HERS in her mind!
This is reminding me ALOT of the OP who was being harassed by his Sperm Donor and her Boundary violating Wife who did the same shit that happened here! He distance himself and JUST as he married and had a kid, they cam back in EXPECTING to be GRANDPARENTS, Especially the Not right in the head Homewrecker because sadly his wife's sister's POS husband in a MOVE thinking he could FIX his own marriage via this. Found out about OP "Sperm Donor and STEPHomewrecker when OP mentioned his past one drunk night that was SAID IN CONFIDENCE it would never be brought up again! LOOKED for them! Then when everyone in the family were wondering HOW they found out about OP and his family! His only excuse when caught was "We need more family!" As said, He and SIL were already on the rocks and he wasn't a good person! OP got a Restraining order! But the POS moved to a House NEAR where his new home was so now he HAS to deal with them trying to Boundary push again! And we know the OBSESSED check the dates on those orders as they INSTANTLY get back to STALKING/HARASSING the VERY SECOND the Order expires!
I had the same thought.
Umm excuse me? Mom died at a celebration dinner for the dad, because of an allergy… and then 6 WEEKS later, mom’s stuff is at the dump and new wife moved in? Yeah, something is more than suspicious about that ..
I came to say the same thing! Almost like the dad PLANNED it right? It’s all super suspicious to me too.
Grow up.
@Clyde-S-Wilcox you grow up, allergies are rarely an accident. It's either negligence on the part of the restaurant for not checking their dishes (assuming mom told them) or its intentional (dad didn't tell them anything.
If I wanted to off my fiance for any reason all I'd have to do was slip some worstishire in his food at a restaurant. It would honestly be comically easy to kill somone with an allergy, and why didn't she have an epi-pen. Did someone remove it or forget it.
yup, my thoughts exactly. OP's mom was murdered.
@@PixieSpellsLove Having a woman ready just after his wife died? No ..that happens all the time /s
Nothing to see here ..just move on
I'm so fed up of hearing "Be the bigger person." Or "The best revenge is living a good life." OP has every right to still feel hurt.
Absolutely!!!!
I'm still waiting for a reason why he shouldn't have been blunt in his rejection. She hurt him all through college, but now that he's "good enough" she deigns to give him attention, but he should just suck it up because HER feeeelings? I've always believed turning the other cheek just leaves you with both sides of your face slapped.
Right? It wad the last straw for her? She didn't car about that when she was tearing OP down did she.
Yeah, the people who are in the right are always told to be the bigger person and take abuse
Why do I have a feeling daddy knew this woman long before mom passed away. God bless good luck. God bless your mother. Sorry for your loss
“Mom died of an allergic reaction during a celebratory dinner”… anyone wanna take bets that Dad “arranged” for the deadly allergen “accidentally” being present in Mom’s food, so that he could be with the new woman?
Y’all beat me to the punch! Everything about OPs “dad” and do over wife scream sus. And I’m also betting OPs mom’s jewelry and other valuables weren’t trashed but sold to use to pamper the entitled princess. OPs doing the right thing by getting his revenge through living his best life away from them.
@@imweakfordeakyI was thinking the same thing. The 6 weeks is too close for comfort.
Yep dad murdered mom and married his mistress.
@@aindrilaroy4464 I think most of us were thinking foul play, or at least taking advantage that he didn't have to hide his mistress anymore.
Or he dealt with his grief in a terrible way and was trying to fill the void with another person/relationship. There's a reason most grief councilors heavily recommend waiting until after the first anniversary of a significant other's passing to attempt to start dating again.
Mother replaced by evil stepmom story: OP, are you sure your father did NOT arrange for your mother's allergic reacting and cause her death. That certainly fits the rest of the story.
Can't believe he would murder OP mother, I DO believe he would CHEAT on her and was likely ready to leave her and OP till that incident happened, making it ALL THE MORE easier for him! He's only bothering his son because he DARED to make his Living Sex Doll Cry like OP should give a damn (talk about obsessed that he would call from an Unknown number just to flying Monkey his own son! What a POS this man!)
thats exactly what im thinking, the fact OP has no half-siblings is also something i didnt miss. so dad was cheating with this woman who maybe cant have kids, he just so happens to have a child but also has a wife, doesnt want to get a divorce, lose money, lose any custody of this child he wants to give to the new woman, ends the wife. throwing everything of the wifes away was just twisting the knife, it also showed he didnt care about her in the slightest.
Maybe i have seen too many true crime but could the dad put something in knowing her allergies in hopes to get ride of the problem. 4months and he got a woman i bet he already had one before mom passed. The way sperm donor took a bulldoser to all of ops moms things and memories as soon as the dirt is on her casket makes me think like this.
Father definitely had something to do with Mom's death. And he was already involved with step witch
My thoughts exactly
Six weeks? I’ll be haunting you and his new bride. Full Amityville Horror
6weeks… okay so new wife was definitely an affair partner. I’m half convinced that allergic reaction was no accident….
@@mattwho81 that or they got extremely lucky to get an easy out
@Wander85942 I'm inclined to believe it was murder. Mostly because a person with such a serious allergy would be prepared and have a game plan. Like, did she not have an epipen? Where they so far from a hospital that they couldn't go there? He would have sued the hell out of the restaurant for messing up. Because surely, she would triple check that they have a safe space to make her food free of allergen. None of this seemed to happen. He swept it under the rug as if nothing happened.
Me too.
Agreed! 6 WEEKS?!! They were definitely having an affair. And they're total psychos for STILL harassing OP over that stupid gd photo album SM made! This makes me so freaking angry, that it makes me wish I was an assassin. I'd offer OP my services, pro bono.✌️😂
I wonder if op’s mom was murdered instead of just having an allergic reaction. It’s crazy how quick he moved on
That is how it sounds, doesn't it?
@@jaymeVos seriously, and I would go as far as to think that it was either the new woman by herself. Nothing worse than a woman’s scorn.
Reading these comments have given me the chills. That would be so vile!!
She had an allergic reaction at a restaurant. I think the dad probably got some money or something.
The "OP hasn't changed or matured if he's still holding a grudge for his bully" comment comes from a former bully, or at least, someone who's never been bullied. OP gave her the same energy she dished out, and she deserved it.
These people really did not read the story and are just making excuses to vilify OP it’s pathetic. And please tell me how does this girl deserve any sympathy whatsoever when she shown nothing but disrespect. Do these people not know that respect is a two-way street.
Let me guess she’s a girl so she deserves sympathy, right?
OP didn't bully the woman, he just showed his disdain for a former bully. NTA
And if she has poor self esteem, that’s a her problem. She didn’t care about OPs self esteem when she brutally rejected him. Did these friends help pick OP up after the rejection like some of the friends did with her?
He said a sexist thing that is only ever said towards women. He isn't different. He's still a sexist POS, just thin now.
Yep, I love these "High Horse assholes" who think they have a right to judge ANYONE! Especially if their Former Bullies who likely are now in that POSITION their victims SAID they'd end up, but they laughed and saw it as "loser talk" till now their IN that position and expect forgiveness! And it's WORSE from the ones who were never bullied who'd I suspect saw someone getting bullied, but in FEAR of being bullied themselves, they left that person to their fate and are FEARFUL of "Immature Victims coming back on THEM for being an ALLY of the bully by abandoning them" or "Thinking their HELPING a victim by telling them to be a Bigger Person when all their doing is showing how HORRID they are compared to the bullies by not going back to MINDING their own business like they did before! Love how they condemn the victim, but none of that was around for the Bullies!
RE: The Village Bicycle
Every one of those YTA comments are from a person who has NEVER suffered at the hands (or words) of a Bully - Zero Doubt in my mind.
They are also the people who will speak volumes on Empathy without ever having a concept as to what the word really means.
They are also lying. They probably chewed out the last person that disrespected their thought bubble mood or whatever minor infraction was super important to them at the time. Nothing like being tornented for years by someone who knows how to hurt you.
The double standard on Story 3, it okay for a woman to be mean girl to an overweight man, but once he works out to be better and fires back at her is wrong?
The village bicycle did not respect him but now hes the idiot for calling it how it is?
Yes, the Reddit irony!
@@robertx8020 Don't talk so dumb. Everyone can post at reddit and most comments had no issue with his behaviour.
@@uwetheiss970 Talkin about dumb!
Something wrong with your eyes?
My comment says NOTHING about WHO can post on Reddit (besides that YOU are wrong as you have to have an account /sign up to be able to post..so that is a 'dumb' remark)
2nd My comment OBVIOUS to anyone but you,. ofc only aplies to ppl that fit the "OP is TA for sayinbg this" group!
So before calling ppl '\ dumb' always double check if you are not saying something stupid yourself"
Got it kid?
He was INTERESTED in riding that bicycle himself, so he shouldn't calling her names. He made himself a hypocrite, just like she is.
@@masumi1990x Not really, considering how things have changed.
Pretty sure dad in story 1 killed his first wife.
Probably from the way it sounds
Sounds like a murder plot but ok. There’s no way that was a freak accident.
And such an allergy with no epipen or some other safety measures? Top it off with "moving on" with someone else in 6 weeks and married months later? You'd be an idiot to *not* think it a conspiracy.
The man who dressed down that wonan is not the idiot... might not have been necessary, but he's not an idiot... she bullied him, he replied... screw all the YTA commenters
"screw all the YTA commenters"
Isn;t that what she should do?
I mean, she has the experience lol
He's an insecure aole who has been practicing that little speech for years. He is just supremely jealous HE couldn't be the town bicycle himself because he couldn't get ANY girl, not just this one. Why does he think he shoild have been able to have sex with her just because other guys did? He is still a loser.
I have a feeling the poster that was against him, was the village bicycle and has a history of being a bully.
Anyone who's ever been bullied, is cheering.
All the village bikes are upset.
Village Bicycle lmao she must have broke a chain while he was gone
Everyone wants to ride the new bike. But once it loses it's paint, the tires get dull, and the seat gets saggy, no one wants to ride it anymore.
Getting married less than 6 months after 'meeting'. Yeah... they were having an affair.
Sorry but Opie is not the a-hole for calling a bicycle a bicycle considering she continuously disrespected him for a long period of time and only changed because he got fit.
Can’t really say that she even changed. She saw a guy she wanted to sink her teeth into and went after him. She’s just boo hooing because OP turned her down and now she has to stay there instead of travel abroad with OP.
If she had approached with an apology and an offer of friendship, she would be worth the time of day. She showed her continued shallowness
@@notevenlistening6072 I don't think so. She went out of her way to bully this guy. An apology isn't worth diddly squat IMO. Sure she might have "matured" or changed, but you have to work for forgiveness. If I were OP I would trust the offer of friendship had she made it, the same way he didn't trust her newfound friendliness.
@ynmonroe She definitely wouldn't be owed anything even if she had somehow turned over a new leaf. At least I could feel neutral about her rather than feeling disgusted, as it is
@@GreenKnight1982 and she didn’t really change. She wanted to use a guy to boost her self esteem only for her past actions with OP to take its toll. Guess she was also hoping to travel abroad with OP.
I cannot get over the YTA On the fat guy post. So she gets to harrass him for his weight, but when he mentions her promiscuity once, he's the issue? Be for real.
Yep, like always there's a bunch of "be the bigger person", "don't say anything nasty because you're an ahole if you do" and a bunch of other pretend outrage over supposed moral high ground 🙄
The usual Reddit hypocrisy. He has to be the "bigger person", but she is allowed to be a mean girl.
@buckeyenative1365 eh, Reddit hates slut shaming. (Maybe it's a little too personal for a lot of them) That's all this is. If he had insulted her another way I have no doubt these same commenters would totally be on board.
And it didn’t sound like she even apologized. Plus this friend was already a train wreck hence her going through guys like tissues during allergy season.
Because op is male
Last story: NTA. People who refuse to accept "no" as an answer by continuing to nag get no sympathy when the truth comes out and hurts their feelings.
And how “adorable” sister is acting like her moving in with OP is her being altruistic. She’s a cautionary tale not a role model. The fact that she also brings this up when OPs wife isn’t around is also telling.
Also she was not in the least bit well intentioned. She's trying to be a replacement mommy to OPs kids in exchange for a roof over her head. She's the type to be pressuring OP's children into calling her mom
Took her stuff to the DUMP?! Oh, that is not ok, and she was already waiting in the wings. I'm so sorry that you have gone through this.
Mom died of an allergic reaction? Anyone else think that the dad had the woman waiting in the wings and decided to take advantage of his wife's allergy instead of getting a divorce?
Story 2: So they all bought a purse for their daughters and are mad you did the same? NTA.
Yeah I didn’t agree with the YTA commenters especially when they assumed she used her spouse’s money to buy the purse. She just said that he makes more than her. I do hope OP looks into another playdate group
@@lorilancaster5917 Yeah that YTA commenter was REACHING so far I saw their hands from here.
No one buys a designer bag for the looks. They’re ugly with designer initials on them. It’s all vanity. OP was showing off buying an expensive bag for a 6 yo, who has nothing to put in it and will lose it soon enough. The cult of celebrity digs in deep.
If you spend $2000 on something that you know will be lost, YTA. You are literally throwing money away. $2000 could save someone's life and you are literally throwing it in the trash. That makes someone a bad person
@@ironman_546 sounds like someone can't afford $2000.
Story 2: Every kid in the group got a purse except OP'S daughter. This was mean girl behavior, parents edition. "Oh, OP can afford to buy her own purse for her daughter." Also, the one who did that became enraged when OP did just that.
OP'S appropriate response should be "if you think your daughter's heartbroken that my kid has a special purse, imagine how heartbroken my kid was, being the only kid who was excluded. Next time you're splurging on group gifts, please include everyone."
This.
The way OP was talking about the bags, I got the impression they weren't high end.
Except giving one kid a $20 purse is not the same as giving a kid a $2000 purse
@ironman_546 the fact of the matter is op's daughter was excluded and op fixed it x10 sfw
@@psycojuggalo1642excluded by whom? It read as the older girls respective parents bought them purses. Not one parent bought purses for everyone but OPs child.
Your dad was cheating and now I'm suspicious about that allergic reaction. He didn't meet her six weeks later, move her in the next day, and get married five and a half months after your mother died because she was a stranger. No, he knew her very well. And I'm not joking, you might want to run that timeline past a homicide detective and see how they feel about it.
What hell is up with these people vilifying OP in the bicycle story, talk about terrible reading skills, where he pretty much gave her a very blunt rejection, he was not a jerk about it. I have seen similar stories like this were there was a girl bully in this path but then when they all grow up she suddenly wants to be interested in him. Respect is a two-way street why should someone give respect to a person who’s done nothing but give disrespect, what kind of freaking sense does that make? And I wish these people would stop with the be the bigger person which actually means be the bigger doormat? Really does prove how much this community does not know the true concept of be the bigger person.
Essentially calling someone a whre is NOT respect. He didn't talk about men like that, which means he is, you guessed it, sexist as hell.
“he was not a jerk about it”, he called her the village bicycle, how is that not a jerk? He doesn’t owe her kindness because of how she treated him in the past, but insulting her unnecessarily just causes issues. He could’ve rejected her, not insulted her, and moved on. He chose to be mean and start this issue. I get why, but he chose this life.
@@infinitetranquilo She slept with every guy in their friend group except for him all while openly mocking him about it in front of all their friends, so he wasn't wrong in calling her the village bicycle.
The truth hurts. He was nicer about her gross double standards than I would have been.
And it isn't just girls, guys are as much to blame for being man-wh0res. I think promiscuity is gross. Many people do.
People should understand that we all have different ideas about, well, everything. If only she had been nicer about rejecting him all those years ago, I'm sure he would have been nicer with his own words. But "being the bigger" person is just allowing yourself to be walked over like a doormat.
I would assume the only people that really have a problem with this scenario are people that acted the same way she did.
@@ironman_546 Shut the hell up!
You are not right and never have been.
@@infinitetranquilo Shut up!
I am so sick of garbage humans making excuses for bullies.
Story 5: NTA, she thinks she (the single mom who begs for money from everyone instead of working) is a "better influence" than your wife (a woman who works and provides)? That is just delusional.
Exactly. The sister should focus more on being a "better influence" for her own children. I suggest not hooking up with anymore deadbeats and having more children she can't afford.
She could at least show some respect and say that she wants to live in because times are tough for her. Instead she’s trying to play the angle that OP should be honored to have her living with him. No lady now it’s time to be quiet and start adulting.
Those kids can't tell the difference between those bags. The mothers instilled the jealousy.
Yes. But you know that soon enough the other kids will be asking for a bag just like OP's daughter got. I would not want to go through that ordeal.
And that would be a good time to teach that you can't always get everything and that other people's stuff have no bearing on what you can and can't get.
as a poor person who the fuck cares that a kid has an expensive purse. As a poor person you have to learn to not worry about what others have. If someone else wants to waste their money on something that is just not your problem.
EXACTLY!
Village bicycle, it's the truth. And life you get what you give. Maybe now I will get her s*** together.
“I don’t care that my Dad lost some one too.” Lost someone? Or bumped them off? 😬 He sounds like he already had his new wife lined up!
Re: The Purse: NTA
"Introduced status seeking?" Are these commenters for real? Status is derived from perceived value. The kids would always value something. And not everyone would be able to afford that something. I think the girl's peers need to introduce their kids to "Oh, it's nice she got a purse. No, you can't have that one. We can't always have the things we want, and that thing is a waste of money."
It's people with unresolved personal trauma
Imagine having all that money but you "can't" buy your kid nice things because it hurts other people's feelings. I totally think it's stupid to buy a fancy purse for a young kid. But, when you have a lot of money that purse is equivalent to splurging on that new $30 toy they don't need. She needs to associate with different types of people.
@@yamairad1 Agree with you that it's ridiculous for a kid. But it's not my kid, and it's not causing their family financial hardship, so I'm just going to shrug and let other people waste their money on what they want to wast their money on.
Busybodies like the "other moms and OP Sister" who are judging OP out of spite. Disguising it as "advice"
It is 100% the mothers being jealous. Their kids probably have very basic purses if they thing a designer bag is prettier. Most kid purses have unicorns, glitter, animals etc. No way would they like a brand bag more.
Story 1: No way they "met" 6 weeks later and married in 4 months. I'm side-eyeing the dad about the allergy.
2nd story- If you have a problem with how a parent spends their money then perhaps they need to find a friend group in their monetary level. I dare anyone to mind my wallet while not contributing to it. The NERVE 😮😮😮
Yeah. I've got *relatives* all along the economic spectrum from lower to upper-middle. I went to a private school for the first few years of elementary because we're Catholic. A lot of other folks sent their kids there because it was the only private school in the area and it was a sign of wealth. I know the difference between simply having expensive things and being a dick about it. OP was *not* being a dick. The play date mom who got a purse for everyone except OP's daughter *was.*
His dad got away with it.
Yup.
Tell stepmom according to her logic her stuff has to be thrown out because she is dead to you
Story 1: are we sure mom died from an accident ? I seen fast engagements but this is ridiculous.
"Even Beyonce likes to shop at Target" Lmao, stop, no she doesn't.
Unless she's getting paid for the promotion
Right? I highly doubt she even does her own shopping. If she does, the store is probably closed to other shoppers.
@@ynmonroe Oh, she's sometimes in the commercial? Guess what, those aren't actual shoppers in the background!
Like...I've never seen Blue outside in Target or good will. But we all know the biggest crime a redditor can commit is earn more than minimum wage
@@TailsFan Lol. I'm not surprised. That's not to say she would never make a "surprise" popup somewhere but there would be a reason behind it and shopping isn't it.
That lady came in threw away all of OP's moms sentimental stuff who died months ago and then said she was "Excited to finally have a son". Lady basically just declared war as far as family relations go. Like any sort of a chance for positive relationship was dead the moment she did that.
6 weeks? Did his Dad know of her allergies? Freak accident… umm doesn’t sound like an accident to me…
He married and tossed her stuff out..
He wanted her dead and gone entirely.. and it sounds like he got away with it!
The first wife was definitely murdered for the affair partner.
Story 4: NTA, if a name upsets either parent for any legitimate reason, it should be and was vetoed. The trauma connection with a close family member definitely counts.
Heck If I had a child I would veto any name that is 4 letters, because of my bad history with people that had 4 letter names and nicknames.
This is really a conversation that should've been had long ago. Like, when they discussed if they even *wanted* kids or not.
@@brigidtheirish Most people don't even think about names of their possible children, till there is a pregnancy.
@@maurer3d Yeah, but if you have a name that's a definite *no,* that should be mentioned during a discussion about having kids.
Last story, NTA for sure. She kept pushing, disrespected OP's answers, then his wife then went crying to mum and dad when she didn't get her way. Don't ask a question you don't want an answer to!
The photo album story: he moved on so fast bc he was already sleeping with her before the mom’s mysterious “freak accident”, there’s no way she didn’t announce her allergy before being served…
She chose to hit on the guy who had obviously was not interested. I think he had the right to sau something
She might be down but he was affected for a long time.History cant be erased
He didn't go on and on.
Maybe I've read too many of this type of story, but I'm wondering, what caused the allergic reaction? And was it really a freak accident?
With the time line, can't help but think they were already in a relationship.
Story 1: NTA....Your father moved a new woman in 6 weeks after your mother died and married her withing 6 months? Either he was having an affair, or he went nuts and didn't get psychological help he so desperately needed (and still hasn't).
Are you 100% sure you know the truth about your mother's death? Like did she end herself when she found out about the affair?
The money in the comments is on he murdered her so he could marry the b*tch waiting in the wings. Life insurance?
I don't think she ended herself. I think she was murdered.
Last story. The truth hurts. BUT it is the TRUTH. Live with it
Accident? Or murder and quickly moving in the mistress? Sounds like a bad Agatha Christie novel.
Is there anyone else concerned that the dad was seeing his current wife before the previous one died? That he was with the wife at a restaurant when she experienced a serious allergic reaction and for some reason didn't have an EpiPen that worked? This really sounds like he arranged his wife's death to make room for the new one...
New gf 6 weeks after the sudden death of his wife, and married 4 months later? I wouldn't be shocked to find out she was a LTAP and the wife's death was an answer to their prayers. Ugh.
He totally offed OP's mom and got away with it.
The name story. That moment when you realize you may have made a mistake in choosing your mate, but she's already pregnant.
Exactly
@mogulmade Umm no he should have discussed this with her as soon as they got pregnant. Also what if the name Josephine held sentimental value to his wife. This is why communication is key in a marriage. Also if OP can use his family against his wife then his wife can do the same.
Did the dad kill the mom??
Exactly my thought.
It does look suspicious, doesn't it?
Was totally going to say that, I mean it was an “allergic reaction” I’m sure the husband knew about, then the “new wife” moves in weeks later. Yeah he was cheating at the very least
It sure appears that way.
Good point
The only people that could move past their spouse suddenly dying during a celebratory dinner are the people that plotted that death to occur.
Just saying, but every action of that father is highly suspicious.
Last story:
OP's sister opened the discussion about moving in with OP by insulting his wife.
He set her straight on a few of the finer points of her OWN character.
OP is NTA.
1st Story: Not only agreeing with the consensus about OP's Mother and her suspicious passing...but we'll wager Mom's expensive items were sold (or kept by Stepmom), and OP was lied to about it.
Something very similar happened to my cousins. Their mother died of cancer and in a few weeks my, he moved her youngest sister in as his new love interest. He threw out all of my aunt’s things including all of the pictures of my cousins. He even gave her cherished T-bird to the new woman (also my biological aunt😡). My cousins were devastated by their mother’s death then traumatized by their father’s and aunt’s behavior. Neither cared about what my cousins were going through. It was all about them🤬
I really cannot stand Reddit commenters the story about the guy that got bullied by that chick who used to get some sort of Happiness from publicly shaming this guy and bullying him in their friend group all the sudden can't take it when it's thrown back at her and for those people saying it's horrible for him to kick her while she's down what about the several years she kicked him all the time him publicly
Meh, they are all terrible people, including OP. The girl is obviously the biggest idiot for being a bully, then the friends for assumedly not intervening when the bullying took place. But if what the girl did was bad, then OP calling her 'the village bicycle' was also bad. It's understandable, but 2 wrongs don't make a right. A simple "No thanks, I'm not interested" was all that was necessary.
@@SakariWolf13I willing to go with, It's more like years of wrongs VS one wrong, but sure.
@@SakariWolf13 More like "dozens, if not hundreds of wrongs" vs "one wrong".
@@SakariWolf13 - The thing with feeling ashamed is that you'll only feel ashamed if you agree with the person who tried to shame you.
I'm gay, from Northern Ireland, and I had the entirety of Christianity trying to shame me, guess what they never actually did.
Furthermore as an enormous gardening utensil, if you can't handle gardening utensil being your reputation the stop being a gardening utensil.
Story 4: OP is not the A-hole. She was never nice to him. You don't have to be nice to people who bullied you. She wouldn't ha cried if what he said wasn't true. She thought she'd make herself feel better by sleeping with someone who was beneath her and had always wanted her. She was crying because she couldn't even get him.
The baby name story. I whole heartedly agree that baby names need to be a two yes, one no thing.
Und even if the OP's sister would give her blessing to use a name that is a known trigger for her. He is doing the right thing by saying no.
"You rejected me and treated me like shit. Please leave me alone."
That's pretty much what he said. Now she's crying that he wasn't nice to her like she wasn't nice to him.
"The preteen years of living with them." HAHA🤣🤣🤣 It wasn't an individual's age: it was the number of years (7) that OP had lived with them. 🤣🤣🤣🤣 Too much XO.
OP is not the idiot. Especially when his sister is making slick comments about OP’s wife and her job.
Sister is delusional if she thinks that OP and his wife are going fund her poor choices while she sits on her butt and smack talks them.
For story 2: why buy a child a designer bag? If OP has a few then why not give her daughter one she wasn’t using a lot? Daughter gets a fancy bag and OP save money and face. Or how about go to a local store with the kid and ask her what bag she would like?
Why not buy a kid what they want/like?
She can afford it. It doesn't matter if her daughter uses it to ferry rocks and soil. Mommy wanted to be matchy matchy with her and mommy only uses designer bags and even better, mommy can afford said designer bag
@@natashamwangi4890 it sounded like op gave her kid the matching purse that came with her bag
He has to say to wife there is extraordinary horrific trauma sis suffered under her birth name. Its not my place to discuss, but if Id, youd beg me for forgiveness. Its off the table.
Sorry but story 1 sounds like dad “accidentally” helped OP’s mom die and then “magically” met his new wife (probably affair partner) and removed any hint of OP’s mom. That’s evil on another level.
6 weeks? OP's mother's funeral was barely over. Then a strange woman walks in and cleans out all her mother's stuff, with her father helping? Dad obviously the perpetrator of the "allergic reaction". Wonder if there was a life insurance policy involved? and if so, AP should be watching her own back......It's a great pity OP didn't keep that photo album. It may have come in handy to investigate for any clues. Look, even if poor OP's mother's death was a tragic "no one could have done anything" accident, what kind of sociopath moves in another woman in six weeks, and dumps all the memories of a 10 year old child's mother??
‘Village bicycle’ aw! Op said one nasty thing vs multiple years of nasty things every time he went out with friends. And bully girl only wanted to sleep with him because he’d shaped up to her liking. Sounds like she hadn’t changed a bit.
Josie Josephine here.
Children shouldn't have names that are deliberately restimulative to other family members. Children should have their own name.
Another story where all the women have a go at the guy for standing up for himself. Then say he’s not aloud to hold resentment for being bullied.
And conveniently forget she also slept with the guys in a relationships, so why were the girls on her side to begin with
Bullies are owed nothing.
Story1: NTA and I think it is extremely suspicious that the father moved on so quickly. I see I'm not the only one who wonders if someone (the dad maybe) gave OP's mom a little "help" in having an allergic reaction to something. I highly suspect OP's dad was already seeing the stepmom at the very least. I'm too untrusting to think this was just an accident. A person who feels guilty would want to erase any memory of the person they killed, IMO. OP needs to stay away from them and hope he doesn't have any allergies.
St 1: I think stepmother was dad's secret mistress. That's why he married her so quickly.
Last 1: Sister sounds like she would try to disrespect OP's wife and make a power move on her as "Woman of the house".
Story 2: NTA and op isn’t wrong . The jealous woman is crazy as a roach
Last story: yeah I agree with that last commenter. Setting aside her circumstances, she has expressed disapproval of how OP's wife works and is making comments about how she would make a good role model for OP's kids. Sorry but with an attitude like that it would be a hard pass for me. I can just see it now, shortly after she moves in, OP will notice his kids being withdrawn and distant from their mother because auntie is whispering in their ears about how much of a bad mom she is. Nip that nonsense in the bud.
and auntie suddenly stops working because 'she wants to help with the kids'
@@velvety2006 yeah she's just going to create headaches and overstep boundaries so OP should just not invite that into his home.
@@ponyfairyVania also if the family finds the situation so horrible why do they not offer her a place to stay
@@velvety2006 I believe there's a saying that it's easy to be generous with someone else's money, time, space and sanity. They probably have their own reasons, some may be valid like they live too far or the literally don't have the space.
It's hard to be the "bigger person" when the actions of others bloats their egos into elephantine proportions.
Story three NTA! Why would any man want to ride the town bike? Good on OP for standing up for himself! What I find interesting is that all of the women in OP social circle are standing behind a woman who was willing to sleep with men who were in relationships. That says something about the women OP associates with!
probably were fine with it as long as it were not their men
On no planet do i believe that one: dad loved mom, two: dad loved the op, three: dad remained faithful to mom
Getting married 6 weeks after the sudden, tragic death of your beloved wife, while grieving your loss, and while helping your young child navigate losing their mom? Yeah, no. Did dad get married that fast? Yes. Did he love his dead wife? Not believable.
Story 1: NTA. Dad was likely already having an affair with the second wife, hence why he was so quick to move on and erase OP's mother out of existence. I'd even question if he had a hand in her death considering how odd it was and he would've known about any allergies she had.
So her life strategy is to break up relationships but she thought you owed her, what? Has she changed her ways or is she still boinking other women's boyfriends/husbands
Are we sure that it was not a freak accident but that she was murdered instead?
Story 1... Dad is angry saying OP was acting "Spitefully". OP asks: "Was I acting spitefully?". Yes OP you were and, GOOD FOR YOU!!! Be spiteful! Your father and his wife earned this and more! Your mother died tragically and your father immediately brought in a replacement wife and they did their best to completely erase any memory and physical evidence of her from your life and everyone else's life. They are disgusting and horrible people.
Story 1 - Six weeks after op's mom's death? Yeah. I don't blame other people for thinking the dad had a part in killing op's mom. Even if he wasn't responsible he was definitely cheating on her. NTA. Op did himself a favor getting away from these psychos.
Story 2 - I don't understand having to pander to someone's delicate ego if they can't handle being around someone better off financially than they are. I'm on the fence on this one. I only agree it's a really bad idea to gift a 6 year old something so expensive before she even understands the value working for your money.
Story 3 - NTA are people really serious right now? It's okay for her to bully op but op has to consider her poor feefees? If she's going to sleep around with lots and lots of guys she needs to be really tough about the fact people will think she has no self respect for herself or her body. Op called a spade a spade.
Story 4 - NTA. Frankly it doesn't sound like op's wife is on board with supporting op's side why they can't name their daughter that particular name.
Story 5 - Again with the whole "she got pregnant and never finished school". Of course op's sister's life is a mess now. Screw her feelings. She made a really dumb decision not to marry the guy. She could have tried to get alimony. NTA. If op lets this mooch into the house she will never leave and her kids will make it miserable for op's kids to live at their own house. Even if op had no kids I would still say don't do it. The family can accommodate the loser if they're so concerned about her and her kids.
hate me - but I am on the side of the designer bag mom. Her girl wanted a bag. Not necessarily a designer one, but a bag that matched one of mom. So she bought a bag fit for her child - and one for herself. She herself is into the designer stuff - she must have brought designer things into the play group before, just not for her kid or not such obvious ones. But it is down to kid wanting to be like mom. NTA
Nta. You are good enough now. You no longer care. She was a bully. Op was truthful
The weight loss story: NTA. Girl used OP as a way to make herself feel better and then when OP was suddenly up to her standards he was worth it. All he did was return fire once he got to a good vantage point.
No The girl definitely needed to hear that she's the bicycle More 304s need to hear that they're the bicycle.
Thank you
I always feel weird about taking revenge. Even if it’s just mixing words. I’ve always thought that it’s better to move along leaving good feelings rather than bad ones. It’s hurts a lot more knowing you were terrible to someone who could still treat you so well. When you’re a jerk it only reinforces those bad feelings.
My dad pasted qhen I was 10, it crush all of us. My mom slowly got rid of things that dad had, he was a hoarder, but she never could let go of his flannels. When I was in my late 20's mom went on vacation with my uncle, I spoke to my siblings and we took 4 flannels and made them into teddy bears, a nickname for my dad, I gave 1 to mom she cried tears of joy, as she got grandkids we turned all the flannels into bears. When she pasted I put her bear with her. This is how u preserve a memory and love of family. Not dumping it in the trash.
Ouch, that was painful.
It's a manual on how to make sure your kid goes no contact at 18.
First story, just wait a couple of years when they think they are ready to retire. You'll be the first person they demand money from
Bicycle story. Only on Reddit can someone be body shamed for literally a decade.Have one insult retort and be told how awful they are.
Also a general rule of life is if you're going to be ashamed of someone calling you out in your behavior then you shouldn't do that behavior
So it's OK to bully/fat shame a man but tell truth about a woman.
Did OP know about her issue's of late being outside the country.
NTA
Story 1 would anyone be surprised if dad was cheating the whole time
Jealous over a bag
Who even notices anyones bags? As long as you werent bragging NTI. Other people who see someone has something and snipes about it is igit.
How long should a person hold on to anger and yall won’t blame them. In story #3 OP had a crush on someone who bullied him cause he was overweight… 3 years later after losing weight and being in a better mental space he’s flirted with by his bully, he embarrasses her privately after years of public humiliation and somehow he’s told to rise above it! Be the better person? That’s stupid! “I’m not the better person, I Match energies!” If you felt powerful enough to to bully me at my lowest, be prepared for my response when the tables turn… OP you are NTA!!!
17:05 how does OP’s wife feel on knowing her sister in law is judging her for providing for her family?? Sil was being judgmental and trying to take over her brother’s kids like they don’t have a mother. Sounds a lot like pot calling the kettle black.
You are so much better than the village bicycle. After all you were madly in love with her and still call her a friend despite all the "torment" You went through