Remember to subscribe, if you're new here 🙂 👉 t1p.de/2o0n and here are videos related to this one: ▶ 6 Strategies For Resisting Emotional Takeovers From Emotionally Immature People In Interactions ruclips.net/video/V0G7lGocguI/видео.html ▶ Becoming Immune To Emotional Takeovers & Reclaiming Your Mental And Emotional Autonomy ruclips.net/video/fxz_NuVDSkE/видео.html ▶ 4 Steps To Handling Relationships With Emotionally Immature People | Emotional Maturity Awareness ruclips.net/video/CSLi8eNOLBY/видео.html ▶ Why The Other Person Doesn't Have To Change | Untangling Codependency & Enmeshment ruclips.net/video/-iUPjm3tjEs/видео.html ▶ Boundaries & Autonomy Playlist: ruclips.net/p/PLzRKYOPcN3c8cAsy94uaCWyY6p1Nro4ZC
I am a mother of three adult daughters. For their partners I am the mother in law. That means, I am sitting at the opposite site of that table. Therefore I want to give you all an advice. It is a blessing to be a parent and during the time you raise a child you develop a very strong bond. When the child grows up it has to step in the world by itself. It has to loosen this bond, maybe to cut it. For the parents this is a hard moment. We need time to understand, that our children and their partners don´t need our advice anymore. So please be kind to your loving parents and talk to them. Make your boundaries and especially the boundaries of your partner known. Have patience. Protect your partner and your parents to find a balance which works for all of you.
Thank very much for sharing your experience and thoughts on this with us! I love how you emphasized the power of effective communication. I once heard the moment a child is born it starts to increase its independence a little bit every day. I imagine that can be a challenge sometimes for parents. And I think like you said with effective communication and empathy on both sides the tie doesn‘t need to be cut, it just keeps evolving 💫
This video is full of well made and practical yet compassionate suggestions. Thank you. I liked all the points you made, including that we can retreat and recharge and even take a step back while our partners get to just be with their family. I especially liked how you emphasised that some else’s reaction to our authentic boundary setting isn’t really our responsibility, it is theirs. Just like it is our responsibility to manage our emotional reaction to other peoples authentic living choices. Thank you again. I was wondering, do you perhpas have a list of helpful beliefs / thoughts about authentic boundary setting that one could cultivate?
Aw, I'm glad so many points in this resonated with you! It's amazing how much can change when we allow ourselves to be in contact with and take care of our needs. At first, it seems like setting boundaries increases conflict, but it actually makes it easier to be compassionately present with others and switch off a mode of generalized rebellion and defiance. Yes, I've got a 6-minute boundaries affirmations video full of helpful thoughts and beliefs around boundaries: ruclips.net/video/vw-IePpBqOU/видео.html Also, I talk about this in this video: “Becoming Immune To Emotional Takeovers & Reclaiming Your Mental And Emotional Autonomy “ ruclips.net/video/fxz_NuVDSkE/видео.html In this video I share a concept from Lindsay C. Gibson that really resonates with me about what she calls the “emotionally immature relationship system” and how not to get caught up in it or step out of it. The core supportive belief is “We are existential equals.” (Not: “You and your needs are more important than me.“) This video also addresses helpful boundary beliefs: “7 Types Of Inner Freedom To Gift Yourself To Stop Repressing Emotions“ ruclips.net/video/uC-bJYGmKV4/видео.html
I had to spend a 3 week long family holiday with people who where energy drainers and most of the time i went to the gym to workout and blow off the steam. it shows you are working towards your goals which is a positive and also they understood.
It wasn't the inlaw's house which was exhausting for me to visit a whole 49 years ago now. It was my marriage partner at the time who was exhausting for me to be around when he was obvious to me at the time the person who probable did not want to be there at all unless I was following his every command there. For example when he felt angry at me only because I had on my own when I thought he was asleep by then moved from that tiny built for only one person cot to the couch next to it in that room in what looked like to me only an attic. Nothing about that family seemed healthy at all while being a married woman while everyone there was in total denial about how immature the son was whom I was marred to at the time.
I have been through both and from my experience I would completely change my behaviour now as a daughter in law. I don't agree with what you are saying you seem to be taking the side of the daughter in law.A mother's pain with a possessive daughter in law is indescribable.
After a 13 hour drive with a toddler and a screaming newborn, we were welcomed with a « you burned all the bridges and you don’t care about your parents » to my husband 😂
Remember to subscribe, if you're new here 🙂 👉 t1p.de/2o0n and here are videos related to this one:
▶ 6 Strategies For Resisting Emotional Takeovers From Emotionally Immature People In Interactions
ruclips.net/video/V0G7lGocguI/видео.html
▶ Becoming Immune To Emotional Takeovers & Reclaiming Your Mental And Emotional Autonomy
ruclips.net/video/fxz_NuVDSkE/видео.html
▶ 4 Steps To Handling Relationships With Emotionally Immature People | Emotional Maturity Awareness
ruclips.net/video/CSLi8eNOLBY/видео.html
▶ Why The Other Person Doesn't Have To Change | Untangling Codependency & Enmeshment
ruclips.net/video/-iUPjm3tjEs/видео.html
▶ Boundaries & Autonomy Playlist: ruclips.net/p/PLzRKYOPcN3c8cAsy94uaCWyY6p1Nro4ZC
I am a mother of three adult daughters. For their partners I am the mother in law. That means, I am sitting at the opposite site of that table. Therefore I want to give you all an advice. It is a blessing to be a parent and during the time you raise a child you develop a very strong bond. When the child grows up it has to step in the world by itself. It has to loosen this bond, maybe to cut it. For the parents this is a hard moment. We need time to understand, that our children and their partners don´t need our advice anymore. So please be kind to your loving parents and talk to them. Make your boundaries and especially the boundaries of your partner known. Have patience. Protect your partner and your parents to find a balance which works for all of you.
Thank very much for sharing your experience and thoughts on this with us! I love how you emphasized the power of effective communication. I once heard the moment a child is born it starts to increase its independence a little bit every day. I imagine that can be a challenge sometimes for parents. And I think like you said with effective communication and empathy on both sides the tie doesn‘t need to be cut, it just keeps evolving 💫
Your emotional reaction is not my responsibility.
It’s not my responsibility to adapt to what they want.
I stumbled across a total gold mine !!
Aw, I’m so happy you’re finding lots of helpful content here ☺️💎
This video is full of well made and practical yet compassionate suggestions. Thank you. I liked all the points you made, including that we can retreat and recharge and even take a step back while our partners get to just be with their family. I especially liked how you emphasised that some else’s reaction to our authentic boundary setting isn’t really our responsibility, it is theirs. Just like it is our responsibility to manage our emotional reaction to other peoples authentic living choices. Thank you again.
I was wondering, do you perhpas have a list of helpful beliefs / thoughts about authentic boundary setting that one could cultivate?
Aw, I'm glad so many points in this resonated with you! It's amazing how much can change when we allow ourselves to be in contact with and take care of our needs. At first, it seems like setting boundaries increases conflict, but it actually makes it easier to be compassionately present with others and switch off a mode of generalized rebellion and defiance.
Yes, I've got a 6-minute boundaries affirmations video full of helpful thoughts and beliefs around boundaries: ruclips.net/video/vw-IePpBqOU/видео.html
Also, I talk about this in this video: “Becoming Immune To Emotional Takeovers & Reclaiming Your Mental And Emotional Autonomy “ ruclips.net/video/fxz_NuVDSkE/видео.html In this video I share a concept from Lindsay C. Gibson that really resonates with me about what she calls the “emotionally immature relationship system” and how not to get caught up in it or step out of it. The core supportive belief is “We are existential equals.” (Not: “You and your needs are more important than me.“)
This video also addresses helpful boundary beliefs: “7 Types Of Inner Freedom To Gift Yourself To Stop Repressing Emotions“ ruclips.net/video/uC-bJYGmKV4/видео.html
I had to spend a 3 week long family holiday with people who where energy drainers and most of the time i went to the gym to workout and blow off the steam. it shows you are working towards your goals which is a positive and also they understood.
Thanks for sharing, sounds like that worked really well!
👍thank you for this video
🙂🌞🌷 glad you liked it!
Excellent ❤
Thank you😊
It wasn't the inlaw's house which was exhausting for me to visit a whole 49 years ago now. It was my marriage partner at the time who was exhausting for me to be around when he was obvious to me at the time the person who probable did not want to be there at all unless I was following his every command there. For example when he felt angry at me only because I had on my own when I thought he was asleep by then moved from that tiny built for only one person cot to the couch next to it in that room in what looked like to me only an attic. Nothing about that family seemed healthy at all while being a married woman while everyone there was in total denial about how immature the son was whom I was marred to at the time.
I called someone out for this and he ended up gaslighting me so i completely cut him off cause i dont have the time or energy to be gaslight again
I have been through both and from my experience I would completely change my behaviour now as a daughter in law. I don't agree with what you are saying you seem to be taking the side of the daughter in law.A mother's pain with a possessive daughter in law is indescribable.
Emotional takeover
After a 13 hour drive with a toddler and a screaming newborn, we were welcomed with a « you burned all the bridges and you don’t care about your parents » to my husband 😂