Why 70% Relationships End in The First Year | Sadia Khan
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- Опубликовано: 27 авг 2023
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If you want to have more love and improve your modern relationship this is for you!
Expert in psychodynamic therapy and relationship specialist, Sadia Khan is breaking down the dynamics of modern dating! 🔥
With her wealth of expertise in relationships and personal growth, Sadia Khan has been a beacon of guidance for all those seeking love and companionship.
Tune in + find out:
- The number one reason we struggle to keep relationships
- The root cause of infidelity
- The importance of self-control in a relationship
- Practical dating advice
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Looking for healthy love? Watch this and share your biggest takeaways below! Make sure to subscribe to never miss our content again at RUclips.com/Lewishowes
With our common dating histories of moving away from narcissistic women, it's a tough call who said more times wow during this interview. May those insights take us to what is the best for us in the longterm. Bless you my friend.
I would have accepted to join in on Instagram last week and I wasn’t available to at that moment. Maybe next time! 😉👍🏻
Awesome interview.. not that the interviewer excelled, he just knew when not to talk and chose the right guest. Of course, today that still puts him (you) in the top 1%. LOL. Seriously, sharing this. This woman (Sadia Khan) is brilliant and insightful. More of her please, thank you.
I noticed this is a perspective from a foreigner American women were not raised like this they are more privilege so they’re equals to their partners
@@nebojsaradivojevic6447q4
Amazing “hurting your partner should hurt you if your in healthy relationships” ❤❤❤
So glad you enjoyed it! Appreciate you for watching.
Hhmmm.... my ex... Always attacking me with no basis then telling me she was always unhappy. Funny that, so was I but, i kept trying to build, compliment her & improve things for 33 years, but nothing made a difference. Everything I said or did ("clearly") was for evil, underhand, ulterior motives! Apparently.... 🤦♂️😥
This comment is. Eyeopening . I just saw it now. And it hit me emotionally. More stuff I see. To work on personally. Good stuff. Here
Experts say 20 percent of people of the planet are emotionally healthy for relationships.
It probably comes from having a happy childhood where kids got the tools of socializing and finding purpose, in a very loving caring way, and respect.
So even if parents had trauma in childhood, they should go to therapy or practice mediation metacognition before starting a family and having kids, so they provide good childhood to kids.
Thank you so much for having me Lewis I loved this conversation ❤
Loved this!! Makes so much sense, thank you Sadia and Lewis this was inspiring and helpful ❤️
Yay! So glad you were on this! You are delivering some much needed information both men and women need to hear. Amazing work Sadia!
I simp for Sadia!
Thank you!❤
Are you single?
“They replace us with pornography and we replace them with likes and comments on social media” hit the nail on the head! Glad I’m learning and bettering myself in this amazing relationship I’ve finally found!
Women receiving compliments and likes from possibly hundreds of men that are praising her for simply existing and inflating her ego is nothing like a dude watching porn by himself and it isn't replacing women. If men were going to do that, they would just leave
@@jackass992 Are those men not inflating the egos of those women in the same way?
@@jackass992it is men's fault as well. Too many weak men that are thirsty definitely helped create this issue. Women definitely hv inflated egos with the illusion of choices like she said but we gave them those inflated egos.
Yep there career and side gig that guys approve because girls who get an education are granted a good income with a bachelors level only in nursing which is tough otherwise she has to keep going to school cuz even a a lawyer woman have a bigger population in the field and get paid less but if in the porn industry they don’t have to much and make more sadly
Paid less than the man in field
Sadia truly is a breath of fresh air! We are so used to the extreme feminist ideology, that we forget about the core values. I’m a millennial so I didn’t grow up with social media, and those type of pressures. I’ve seen firsthand 10, 11 year old little girls worry about their body and self image growing up in an over sexualized society. Everyone is so worried about offending literally anyone, that we’ve all lost our voice.
Agree 💙
I'm afraid little girls will always grow up worrying about their bodies growing up. I'm a millennial, too. And we worried about our body too cause of women in magazines.
At least now.. we are able to see women being represented from all shapes, sizes, and colors on magazines, media, and tv/film.
It's the parents' job to help kids BOTH BOYS & GIRLS to respect each individual's bodies. And to help them understand what's good and bad. Etc...
For example... beauty fades.. but a woman with a brain and her education will get her very far. Etc...
There's no such thing as "extreme feminist ideology." Wanting to control our own economic and reproductive destinies is only extreme if your fundamental belief is that woman are and should be permanently dependent on men and male-dominated societal structures. And blaming relationship failures on feminism is simply ignorant.
@@howtosober I’m definitely not blaming feminism for that, you missed the point entirely. I can support equality and reproductive rights and the same time be in my feminine energy and not agree with every little thing “extreme feminists” agree on. But nowadays, you’re either all in or all out. Both men and women’s relationships seem so dispensable, and that is due to many factors. I recommend you listen to different views and get an idea of why yourself, fascinating but sad stuff.
@@kittyantixgiirl it is already a big issue, I see them on the comment section .
14 years old girls being ashamed of their looks, do not like their body when they still need to grow
Its way too common nowadays
SAD
Being a high-value man and woman has nothing to do with wealth it has everything to do with morals and values and character
Absolutely
Truth Bomb. 👍❤
Some people have these values without money and have been walked away from due to their financial struggle!!!
26 high value men: men with self control
32.30 high value woman
"If he has no self-control; he is a liability to you and your children." Come on!!! Good job Sadia :)
If she’s a single mother, recreational use only…
This doesn't just go one way.
If she wants the attention of the world, she isn't right for anyone, and won't be satisfied with any ONE.
"We go into relationships blind to our own wounds."~Sadia Khan. So deep and so true!
Dr. Bruce Lipton: says most people behave in a way they were raised in ages 0 to 7 because at this age the brain and subconscious mind program is developing, so it continues to adulthood and most people are not aware of these negative habits they observe in childhood, unless they start to seek therapy you do mediation etc.
Some people stay single because of their trauma, not growing or bettering themselves, which means that they’re not healing or bettering themselves.
You don’t heal all of your life. You do what you need to get out of that zone, WHILE you’re living a full life with a job, friends, traveling, etc.
Life is lived in its totality. You can’t stop working because you’re traumatised or healing. Simple and incompetent people who can only do one thing at a time, need psychiatrists and better discipline. Because most people juggle job, family, dating and friends all at one, without whining about it.
People who are traumatised from their parents marriage, a broken engagement, rejection or changing gender roles, are not taking a break from dating because a break means that they go back to dating. They’ve checked out from dating.
Being single doesn’t mean that you’re happy, healthy, have no traumas, growing, employed, successful, wealthy, have options or disciplining yourself. It could very well mean that you’re being rejected because you have unrealistic expectations of what a marriage is or that you can’t talk to the opposite sex. You could very well be single AND unemployed, rude, unhealthy mentally and physically, not at all social, traumatised, lonely, selfish, broke, regressing, unsuccessful, living with your parents and amounting to nothing whatsoever, no personal growth, having learnt NOTHING new, etc.
You could very well be single BECAUSE you don’t know how to talk to women, understand the particular girl’s sensibilities or where she’s coming from, etc. Any man who can’t talk to women, cannot have a successful relationship with one.
Some single people are disillusioned, hopeless, traumatised and don’t want to risk putting themselves out there. MGTOW is an example. They’re extremists who view the world in black and white. They are not balanced.
Trauma or no trauma, is NOT a reason to choose a relationship or reject one. Your reasons must be better. The world is filled with people who have trauma but can still enjoy themselves, become successful and have a family. WHAT are they doing differently?
Small trauma doesn’t equate the trauma of being a war victim or rape victim. Some people are too immature, incompetent and self consumed, to think that their particular trauma is the end of their own world. Maturity and wisdom tells you that it isn’t.
Most stalkers are single. That’s hardly a sign of happiness. Happy people don’t harass or stalk.They want relationships but don’t know how to talk to women.
If your needs aren’t met, you walk away. You DON’T CHEAT. I appreciate the breakdown the mechanisms of cheating, but I wish there was more emphasis that cheating itself is an extreme and nefarious act.
Try rejecting a lonely, anxious, panicky, broke, heartbroken and neglected guy with personality disorder. He’ll abuse, harass, stalk and commit crimes against you for years. Intruding in your private life, social life, ruining your career at a very sensitive stage without EVER having known you.
All of which has no bearing on HIS life and doesn’t impact his life the slightest. Yet he will panic and feel triggered over everything that you say and do, without ever having known you. He will try to control the life of a stranger, always feeling out of control because you can’t control people.
The need for control stemming from a broken engagement which made him feel like absolute shit because he had NO identity outside of it, followed by a reaction from a stranger, which send him spiralling down, losing himself for years on end.
Refusing to see a psychiatrist. Talking ALL his piled up shit out on a stranger. Vicious. Angry at the world. Seeking revenge. Negative emotions at a sky high. Refusing to feel positive or focus on himself. Refusing to get help. Refusing to better himself and let go of what never existed. Not knowing WHY he’s doing why he’s doing. Falling short of why he claims are his morals and values thereby feeling like shit.
Imagine falling so low, that you need a psychiatrist to tell you not to hack another persons phone because it’s a crime AND because you have NO right to intrude on someone’s privacy.
You shouldn’t be in a position where someone needs to explain that to you. No one has ever told me that because I’ve never done it. You should be focusing on yourself and your future. Not people whose actions and words have no bearing on your employment, social life, love life or private life. People who reject you and have never been in your life, can’t possible have such a big impact on your psychological state or decisions. Why would you factor in a girl, in your decisions, who you’ve never met, talked to and who has never been a PART of your life? You can’t take her with you, if you move. So why is she a factor?
THAT to him will be more important than focusing on himself, controlling himself and getting somewhere in life. He will waste his 20’s and 30’s ruining his life and that of others. A man who cannot respect himself or his own time cannot respect anyone else.
She's intelligence to a whole other level. We should be grateful to have that kind of empathetic sharp intelligence dishing out such great insights.
🙌
Boundaries are to teach a person how to love you. Sadia Khan
She dropped knowledge for both men and women. Absolutely fantastic interview
I think this advice can be applied to all relationships, not just romantic ones. Too many people nowadays project their insecurities/traumas onto the people around them instead of learning how to deal with their own issues, which causes rifts between friends, family, and romantic partners.
How can a person not project their insecurities onto the people around them?
@@LilyFaith-vy3nw People project their insecurities onto others when they are unaware of their insecurities. The more self-aware you are the less you project onto others.
❤❤
I'm 27 and I've been thinking I developed myself enough, but this woman started speaking facts straight from the beginning. So many of the things she said that aren't good exist in me. I'm gonna make notes out of this podcast and watch it every once in a while to keep myself on track. Thankyou Lewis and Sadia, this episode is an eye opening one for me, and I just can't thank enough.
I agree with you.
Learned so much from this podcast.
Definitely gonna revisit this and make notes and adapt the information for my betterment
I took notes too! I’m 29 and thought I’ve done a lot of good work on myself, but I see I need to grow in many ways
It doesn't stop. Life, in all it's many facets keeps bringing more things to learn and grow from.
Stay limber of mind and body as much as you can. The idea of control can be dangerous because there are so many things that happen that you'll have absolutely no control of. Things can change in an instant.
Learn to ride the wave and fall off the board as gracefully as you can because you will fall, and will have to pick yourself up many a time. From those experiences you will learn to rise, ride, fall and rise again. That's why working on staying limber helps.
Well done!!!🎉
@@annagoldenGreat comment!!
There is Jordan Peterson and there is sadia khan❤. Rare Gift to humanity and school of psychology 🎉
I'm so glad my lifetime crossed paths with Jordan and Sadia's lifetime.
Well said!!
I love Sadia’s content. Thank you for inviting her. She is brutally honest, doesn’t sugar coat things and is objective.
She is a 304
She does say "unfortunately" a lot, though. I think that's her way of sugar coating the reality.
This woman is amazing. She is a breath of fresh air in this instant gratification society. Thank you Sadia for all you do.
Sadia Khan is exactly what is needed in the relationships/mental health content creator space. She doesnt stand on either side of the men or women. And most importantly she is fair with her critiques. Wish her more success!
When you accept bad behaviour and make excuses for the other … you are absolutely setting yourself up for failure. Love you Sadia and your truthful message. ❤
Yes, that’s being an enabler. It’s unhealthy and it’s not love.
"boundaries are meant to teach people how to love you"... this line makes me ponder.
What a riveting interview! Sadia Khan’s insights into love, companionship, and personal growth really resonate. Thanks to both of you for this enlightening conversation! 🙌
🔥
So powerful!
I've shared this podcast with my bros, and all of us agree that Sadia should be protected at all costs.
Masyaallah she is an intellectual breath of fresh air.
Im happy and excited that Sadia is gaining momentum- she offers realistic insight and tells it how it is
“Your looks are the only depreciating value that you have”. That’s deep and eye opening. Really enjoyed watching this.
It’s deep, but I don’t think it’s entirely accurate. Sexuality is a value that attracts others, but it too dissipates.
So glad you enjoyed it! Appreciate you for watching.
There’s also your car
"Your looks are the only depreciating asset you have." Sadia Khan
I can't get enough of listening to Sadia. I don't know what kind of a human she is but she is like a magnet with her description of issues and cures for relationships. Huge applause to her and respect.. Thank you for hosting.
You're welcome, thank you for watching🧡
The first 10 minutes were straight facts. The clarity and confidence she articulated this wisdom is astounding. Thanks sadia
🙌
The best compliment I ever had was you're a good mom. I love when people can see your soul.
🧡
How have I never seen her before? She’s insanely smart and articulate.
I was disappointed when this ended. I could have easily listened to you all talk for another hour. I hope you have Sadia back. Her values and perspective are so grounded.
Part 2 is coming.
Well done Lewis with getting her on your podcast. Excellent conversation. Excellent questions for Sadia. The real, usable dialogue people need to hear and understand.
Thank you. Appreciate you for watching!
This lady is so insightful, and is way beyond most female psychologists talking about these subjects. She's a much needed breath of fresh air.
What she said about the wounds is so true, my last relationship he was the one interested at first trying to talk to me asking me on dates he would text morning, afternoon, night asking how I'm doing, if I ate, even thought he works till 7/8pm he'd make time and we were together for a while then he became distant and when I found myself trying to blame him It hit me he did all the job from day one, I was never the one to text and ask how you're doing, I never said let's meet first, and realized I was always nervously waiting for him to communicate first and and if he took a little longer than usual I would get anxious thinking why is he not, yet didn't made myself make the move of communicating first, cause I felt like I was gonna seem needy and uninteresting, and it hit me I've been carrying all this insecurities that didn't let me show how I really felt and give it my whole, so one day the messages just stopped and I didn't try to ask why because of my own insecurities and then kept thinking should I have? Did he want to know if I cared or wanted to try or was he just tired. But either way we do need to be conscious of our wounds and work on then cause we might loose good partners for not being able to show them how we really feel, and might even give them wounds making them feel unworthy or not cared for or like they're not enough.
A high value man has to have self-control. I'm putting this to work. Thanks Lewis.
You're welcome. Appreciate you for watching!
Relationships are very challenging nowadays and educating ourselves is must! Everybody needs to watch this podcast! Thank you ms Sadia Khan & Lewis Howes 👍🏻🙏 really enjoyed
So glad you enjoyed it! Appreciate you for watching.
Thank you Lewis for bringing her on your podcast. I have gained new insights and perspectives about relationship. Sadie spoke about insecurities, validation and all. Thank you for this amazing interview. I got into a relationship before wo looking at those core values/personal insecurities. My approach to dating has totally changed after listening to this. Thank you so much. 😭
Some of the most important things i've heard online recently! I hope there will be second podcast with Sadia and longer, because i can't get enough of listening to her. Thank you both! 🙏
It’s refreshing to hear a psychologist really hit the nail on the head here regarding how popular culture has actually worked towards our detriment rather than help. The Good Book laid the foundation for human interaction and as she said encourages us to “…consider others more highly than ourselves “ Phil 2. That just shoots selfishness in the head. Returning to our original purpose and design to serve one another in love will bear much good fruit in our private and public lives. Shalom.
Literally each word of Sadia is a pure gold! I couldn’t take my eyes and ears of the interviewers. Lewis is perfection , such a gentleman. Thank you so much for the quality time❤
Thanks for being here!
Everything she said made so much sense, even understanding my own childhood trauma and how it relates to my relationship issues. Very good conversation.
This topic was amazing. Thank you for sharing.🙌🏼👏🏼
This is really good. I have shared this with people who are reaching 40 like me and also with someone who just turned 18. This is brutal and eye opening.
Love Sadia!! So happy she’s continuing to grow her online presence
Really enjoyed your conversation with Sadia who really nailed it, I love all her points!! Thank you so much!
I love the examples and this is now one of my favourite conversations!
This vid will save a lot of open minded people who are willing to learn & change for good
I’m really happy that you guys are talking about men and women and having this conversation so open for the world to listen . She’s blowing my mind .She understands a lot of things in this world. And I’m not even halfway in this video ❤
Seldom am I wowed by an interview. This is one of the best descriptions of modern relationships (2023)
Love sadia, this was an amazing conversation,thank you Lewis ❤
Love the deep insights on relationship intricacies and Sadia's wealth of knowledge and observations on what sustains a healthy one ❤
Agreed with the whole conversation. I want to be the change and will be. Our men needs our love and we need their support!
What a strikingly impactful video. Wow. Showing this to my future children. I think about the easy-hard principle and our society of instant gratification. If it's easy on the front-end it'll be hard on the back-end and vice-versa. Do your inner work, practice self-control and long-suffering. I wish I had this knowledge when I was young.
Glad to have a Pakistani 🇵🇰 (based in Dubai) make it to Lewis' podcast! And even more so for Sadia as she shares insights that truly represent the feminism that women globally ascribe to, unlike the western neo-feminism that has alienated men to become passive-aggressive on one hand and anti-women and anti-feminism on the other. Her voice is the voice of many eastern feminists who want to bridge the divides between men and women by helping them grow into the best versions of themselves for peace and prosperity of the family, and the society at large.
Lol
She is a 304
I loved the depth and the logic of this conversation thank you ❤
Great conversation! Sadia keeps surprising me with profound insight into the dynamics of relationships. Lewis is visibly intrigued by her deep revelations.
Lewis’ face as she uncovers it all 😊mind blown!!
Wow I've only seen clips of her on the internet and her talking points but to actually watch this video interview in its entirety was absolutely amazing and definitely enlightening... it definitely as a man gave me a lot to think about for my future and how I pursue future relationships what I need to do to make myself the best I can be for me and for that future partner
She's smart, talented,calm, comport herself in feminine manner, listens and respond well..thank you the both of you 🤝🙌
Thank you Sadia...........You so soothing to listen to....Love your work...💕💕
Wow ! Spot on thank you ! I needed that more than you know. ❤
Great conversation, learned and love it ❤
This is a much needed conversation.
She is so knowledgeable and has so much experience in her sector and people discredit calling her a “social media influencer that doesn’t know anything” and “now anyone can have a microphone” because they hear sound bites and not the whole interview… they really are missing out and jumping to conclusions based solely on her beauty when she even admits it’s not the most important aspect even if she plays it up! I really enjoyed listening and admire her a lot!
Wow...one of the your best interviews Lewis! It's all so true in my experience.
OMGGGGGG THISSSS WAS SO FREAKINGGG VALIDATINGGG!!! THANK YOUUUUUUU🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼
I am so grateful for this episode, it sorts of allows me finally to recognize my own needs and desires and never submit to an unhealthy push of doing whatever that does not align with my values.
🧡
Please stay away from avoidant . They will still cheat even thought you the most feminine being .
For them cheating is a way to stay in control from their independency.
Been there
Be aware ladies ! 😂
❤
To sum this all up, you attract what you are. Simple. Do the work to heal and to better yourself and you'll attract the same.
well said. it is always the same old lesson: you are what you love.
Wow thank you Sadia. This is a hard pill to swallow but I’m willing to embrace this information and grow. 😊
My gosh this was great, thanks Sadia, i love your content and how You explain it
What a beautiful, eloquent, classy woman. I can listen to her all day.
She was so honest and speaking truth. Great interview!
Alot of food for thought. She seems knowledgeable and authentic. Respect. You actually got me to see where I have been going wrong in my personal relationships.
Great insights and conversation!
I love this woman! She brings only reality and raw truth 🙌
Sadia's talk is always GOLD!!
This epi is literally one of the best so far
The best relationship wise video that I have seen so far. Huge kudos!
Outstanding interview! This is exactly what we all need to know and be conscious of. People from all ages, sexual preferences, cultures or religions. Excellent reminder of the true human values. Thank you so much!
You're welcome. Appreciate you for watching!
This woman is the truth! Nothing but straight facts. Absolutely amazing.
Great interview, she made me realize so much!
Keep on rising Ms Khan, you've come a long way
I Love Sadia she’s the role model people need these days 🙏🏻
I appreciate her saying, "If he has no self-control, he is a liability to you and your children." Thank you.
Does that follow for self control from women blaming everything on their partner & spending habits?? I bet not, eh??
@@alexmanojlovic768 obviously.
OMG! Such knowledge and wisdom. Hope more people can watch this.
This interview was eye opening ...thank you!
What an amazing interview - it's no easy task when you first meet someone to identify if your core values are the same.
It takes time before all the different facets of personality and character are seen. ❤
Thanks!
Law of attraction 101: The biggest takeaway for all the single people watching this is that you shouldn't be watching too much this type of content (all things dating rather than maintaining a relationship). Happy single people or happy people in relationships don't watch this stuff all the time or ever, unless they are purely fascinated by the philosophy or psychology of it all - if you want to be one of them neither should you. 90% of your time should be invested in that self mastery and service towards loved ones she spoke about, which is what indirectly brings that good partner into your life. And that's what makes this a great channel, it is always well balanced with different experts from different areas and walks in life. Never take dating advice from a channel that's 100% about dating, you will go too far off on the wrong direction along with all the other perpetually single people who watch it.
What do you mean by self mastery and service towards loved ones?
all things self improvement meaning developing yourself (fitness, nutrition, finances, career, hobbies, social skills, emotional skills, therapy, etc) and service would be using those developed skills to benefit your communities (family, work place, church, etc)@@hari325
I agree with this, you get sucked into a negative perpetual state of mind that is not only unhealthy for you but if you know anything on how your mind works.. what you focus on expands. If you focus on all the negative and ugly aspects of dating then you will literally pull that into your life via circumstances, situations and people. You become what you think about most of the time.
Wow!! Very good point! I keep searching for ways to find a healthy relationship instead of focusing on the healthy relationships I already have. 80% of the time I’m very happy and content with my single life. 20% of the time I feel lonely and incomplete and that 20% seems to get 80% of my attention. It’s time I shifted. Thanks for the reminder!!
glad it helped, it is very normal and nothing wrong with that 20% where you get tempted to try to look for answers and look for strategies to fix things yourselves - just gotta remind yourself that that strategy never really worked, you are very much on the right track when you are mostly happy and content @@montanamarci3810
Fantastic Interview. This is already one of my all time favourite episodes
Interesting conversation, so many things are on point. Psychotherapy and self awareness is the key to harmony in relationships in many cases.
She just dropped the masterpiece of thoughts ❤
Thanks! This conversation is very helpful to me.
Thank you @ sadia khan, what an enlightenment.... Respect
She is my new obsession in psychology and relationships topic ❤ Smart and beautiful 🙌
Such an amazing conversation! I really love her content! Lewis, you’re always so personable and great!
Thank you. Appreciate you for watching!
I loved this video, this conversation so much! Thank you so much 🙏🏽❤️
The insights have helped me a lot x
So glad you enjoyed it! Appreciate you for watching. 🧡
Thank you Sadia & Lewis. Being a British person, I can only imagine what Sadia saw in her teaching profession.
Well said by Sadia. Great questions Lewis. I have talked many times about the overuse of the word narcissist. There is a big difference between some narcissistic behavior and the defined clinical narcissist. Cheers, Ricky 👍
That why I already point it out: no matter you are narcissistic or empathetic or somewhere between, we human has a huge problem of see our own problems, our own trauma in us. We only know how to project onto others , pointing finger to others. But we all attract what we are. Broken attract broken. Look inward, to understand your childhood, understand what is healthy and what is not. Then we will have a better chance to enhance the higher conscious and healthier humanity at large.
I love this woman! Everything she has said is 10000% true! The best YT video on relationships than I've ever watched.
Awesome learning! She makes so much sense.