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Debunking Three Marriage Myths | Episode 21
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- Опубликовано: 14 авг 2024
- Have you fallen prey to these marriage myths? Are culture's fairy tales misleading you?
Many of us embark on a journey fueled by the desire to discover that elusive soulmate, someone who completes us.
But in our quest for marital bliss, have we forgotten the true purpose of marriage? Believe it or not, finding "the one" can be messy, marred with imperfections and doubts.
In today's episode of "At Home with the Beveres", join Addison, Juli, Alec, and Maddie Bevere as they discuss navigating the complexities of marriage, debunking myths, and uncovering the realities of becoming one.
#addisonbevere #julibevere #alecbevere #madeleinebevere #athomewiththebeveres #godlyfamily #familypodcast #godlymarriage #marriage #relationshipadvice #dating #datingadvice #redflags #marriagemyths #marriageadvice #marriagetips #conflict #confrontation #findingtheone
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Chapters:
0:00 - Episode Teaser
0:20 - Jackson Is Engaged!
2:05 - Burning Question: Teaching God's Word to Toddlers and Infants
6:00 - Pressure for Perfection
7:07 - Finding the One with Maddie and Alec Bevere
15:17 - Alec Bevere: Combatting Doubt, Shame, and Imperfection
18:44 - Navigating Red Flags
21:53 - When Alec Knew He Loved Maddie…
25:52 - Perfection Is the Enemy of Progress
29:19 - Myth: Marriage with the Right Person Shouldn't Require Work
30:50 - Myth: You Can't Fulfill Your Calling Unless You're Married
37:37 - Closing Prayer
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The At Home with the Beveres podcast is available on Apple Podcasts, Google Play, and Spotify. Subscribe on your favorite podcast platform to get the audio-only version so you can take it on the go!
We love hearing from you! Drop a comment to tell us what spoke to you in this episode. If you have any questions you'd like us to tackle in future episodes, drop them in the comments as well, and we'll work hard to get to them!
SyncID: MB010FYMRDJ0HMO
I'm literally crying here! What Maddy said about Rebecca's story is answer to my prayers and fasting 😭😭 God really bless my life through your guys in every episode.
You can tell that they both desired to really honor God by being cautious with the other person’s heart.
Even though you process through dating, getting into marriage always brings deep things to the surface that no one knew... usually about yourself. The wisest thing my husband told me before we married was that marriage wasn't to find sole happiness, but for God to use to refine us and make us more like Christ as we learn to walk out love with each other... one of the single most difficult things we can do in our lives. And even though I understood him intellectually, and he understood it intellectually, once married, real life exposes what's really inside us and then it gets really ugly. If you stick it out and allow it to purge you, that's gold! But it's truly so hard... my once perceived strong faith is being put through the ringer... and so many mistakes, so much failure and hurt...it can happen that way even if you don't intend. But to stay the course, is to reap the irreplaceable reward. Sometimes we have to be broken down so much from our prideful ideological view of ourselves and our faith which is so prevalent coming from a "strong Christian" stand as a young person. Marriage is one of God's greatest gifts, not only for flowers and sunshine, but for storms and trials that bring about more christ likeness, IF we allow.
You said this very well. Wisdom at its best.
Marriage makes you holy, more like Christ
It’s incredible to think of how many couples have gone through this throughout all of time. It’s doable because it’s part of God’s plan.
I think more single people within Christian culture need to hear this message and get the pressure off from needing to get things perfectly in dating and relationships. 🙌🏻😊 It almost feels like this is a measure of how close you are to God or a thing to shame people with in case they fail. Thanks guys!
THIS
"Perfection is the enemy of progress". This is me right now. And it stops being me by the end of the day in Jesus name!
Thank you for this guys.
And thank you Addison for your book too, I have it and I can't wait to learn from it.
Amen on all that was said on this podcast.
Yes. I didn’t know Alec was previously engaged. This is such a good episode
Beveres, thank you so much for doing this podcast! In this season of my life, when I’m spending days and weeks by myself, you guys have become “my people”, making me company and enriching my walk with our Lord and Savior. Thank you for being honest, biblical, and Spirit-filled! Hugs and prayers from the Middle East to y’all.
I love seeing Alec and Maddy! God has wonderful things for them!
Thank you SO MUCH for this. I am 2 weeks away from marriage. Comparing myself to divorced christians, thinking I don''t have the guts to stay with someone for life, and looking for perfection, when that doesn't exist. This was unbelievably helpful. Thanks.
Dating over here and this really encouraged me -sooooo many singles in the church need to hear Madi & Alec’s story!! Thank y’all for sharing
This podcast has been such a blessing! Love how real y’all are and the humor cracks me up 🤣
Thank you for watching and your support! ❤️
Thanks so much for the conversation you are having. It amazes me how so many of us have the same expectations and perspective, yet it is not reality. Keep shining the light on the truth.
Thank you for watching and your support! ❤️
This has been so great .. and timely for me because this has been my story with my fiancé we getting married in Dec , and it has not been butterflies all through … but you can sense God through it all, sometimes thinking it’s red flag am learning it’s a green flag … extending a lot of grace coz we both finding ourselves.. and refusing to share with people who are only for us as individuals, realizing people can be toxic too … with their advices , so choosing people who are for us both … that has been great wisdom ,,,,
Thank you all for sharing your stories, I too identify with Maddy in terms of relationship experience, and Alec's comment about single people being somehow viewed as less than married people is still a thing I'm feeling, even though I'm trying not to convict myself on top of society or even the church's messaging.
You have all reminded me that what's most impt is to let God's will and plan be done on me, and whether it leads to marriage (I hope!) or not, I'm to trust Him ❤ God bless you all and everyone watching! 😊
Thank you for watching! Grateful that God used this conversation to speak to you. ❤️
Thank you for this message. It was definitely something we needed to hear. The story of the guests are very similar to our own experiences. God sure used your story of failure and success to help others to learn from their mistakes.
Thank you for watching! Grateful that God used this conversation to speak to you. ❤️
Patiently waiting for part 2 😊
Marty is soooooooo beauuuurrrriiiiifffffuuuuuullllll
Congratulations Alec! All the best to you and Marty
Thank you for watching and your support! ❤️
This episode is impacting me during this season to choose the right one when I have become the right one and to fix my heart posture back to Jesus.
Some people think that there is a difference between Christian dating and other people dating but the reality is that is pretty much the same. People feel attracted to someone most of the time because of the look. Then you invent the person in your mind and see only what you want to see. I watched a TV series called " Two and a half men" and I realized that was the perfect representation how things were in my church. The handsome jerks had all the attention, and many good, honest, Christian men didn't have a chance. James Dobson said once that only 20% of Christians in church were marrying for the right reasons. Many girls marry the handsome jerks in church and then need to spend many hours of conferences, books, etc... trying to fix something that started wrong from the beginning.
Y’all are a God send and this is my favorite Christian podcast, from your parents to the kids & your spouses. Wow, so good. I was going through struggling with perfection in my walk with Christ and I recently stumbled with lust with my “boyfriend” by sexting/flirting too much (we’re courting/waiting until marriage). I am more concerned with getting closer to God, however he is content not really growing a lot in Christ & just wants to follow the “basics” of the Bible. How can I leave him & give up him while I was sinning too? I am not perfect, in actuality we are similar than I thought we weren’t & we are basically on the same path walking together. However, he did tell me he does wants to pray more and get closer. Basically we want to raise our future kids up in the Lord, and I know if God wants us to be together-which I believe because everything has been intentional this time for both of us that we will BOTH grow together in Christ. Instead of wanting him to be perfect with no mistake & then me too, I need to say we will make mistakes and forgive myself, and try to be with God even more. So, I will just pray for us, and stay with him because ultimately we are trying & have set boundaries to not be lustful towards each other & respect each other as God’s children. I KNEW I could find a video on your channel that would be this good for me, thank you guys again!🤍
This is so good only at 26 minutes so far! So authentic my goodness thank you all! God bless this ministry🙏🏾!!
I love this show. The Bevere Family is amazing.
Thank you for watching and your support! ❤️
WOW! This was such a Godsend! Everything said in this video related to my life one way or another and I loved the way youn guys explained things and your perspective on things! Just wow! Also, Alec's wife is sosososo stunning, she has the prettiest eyes and smile!
Thanks for sitting around the kitchen table, I felt I’m there with you all. I loved everything you shared its exactly my stories growing up as a young person, marrying & failing twice without God in the midst with both of us. It makes a HUGE difference. Being Australian myself it was wonderful to hear another Australian voice with similar standards & upbringing of not just going with anyone. I actually was fearful that the young were just jumping into relationships too quickly, maybe it’s my old age just stepping in. :)
I just watched a video where he said what he was looking for in a wife. How beautiful to see he found her. If I remember correctly: adventurous, honest/ helping him be better, strong relationship with God that she would go to God if things were struggling in their relationship….
Wow thank you so much for sharing. And being so honest.So good to hear about to get the pressure off and relax and trust God. Nowadays we need this… young and older. Again thank you ! Blessings
👍👍👍 Thanks to the Holy Spirit and Maddy for directing us to Isaac's and Rebecca's story of hauling water and wondering!!! God's Word is so incredible!!! 🙌 🙌 🙌
well thats a story i never hear, that there are doubts even in moments leading to marriage!! because i feel i would doubt the entire process
"Through the milk?" got me 😂😂😂😭
I am so grateful that you are being so honest & real about these topics 🧡 this is what truly helps others in their journeys. You really just greatly encouraged me - thank you ❗️
Question: Do you have a list of gear that you use for your podcast setup? Especially your excellent cameras. Suggestion: Maybe do a behind the scenes video?
God bless you for this episode. Looking forward patiently for the next episode
I’ve never heard of these myths and certainly never experienced anything like this. But, I can see it’s good advice for secular couples too. Definitely good for newlyweds and those getting ready to marry.
Love love this❤❤
God bless you 🙏🏾
I’m am loving learning from what you share on these podcasts!! Thank you for your surrender to the Father, which makes this channel possible!
Wow, thank you for watching and your support! ❤️ Grateful God's using these conversations to speak to you.
The job is done ✅ That’s all I got: What a profound answer. You couldn’t answer any better than that. That is wisdom.
Nice, Alec! Good to see you are doing so well! You’ve come so far since Pine Creek days!!
Amen:) great podcast today:)@At home with the beveres
Thank you for watching and your support! ❤️
Thank you so much for this. This conversation was so needed
Ive been freed up and confirmed in NUMEROUS ways from this episode! GOODNESS! God has been trying to teach me this for the last 1 1/2 and within the last 3 to 4 months is when Ive started to move on what He's been saying. This episode has helped to solidify what God was wanting to do ALL ALONG! 😭😭😭 Just a snotty nose mess watching this!!! 😭😭😭 Thank You and Bless You! ❤🫂
Must have been a hard dating relationship between Alec and the wife! Almost feel the weight that comes from such strain. Thank you for sharing - it's so liberating.
So glad that the Lord helped you people through.
Shalom! Very Nice show ! How to take part of it if I'm in Paris. Be blessed
What about marriages that are in pastoral leadership but yet are affected by serious generational curses? It can seem way beyond imperfect- how can you get to that place that isn’t “perfect” but is a place of healthy normal relationship-that reflects God, that reflects relationship depth, that reflects deep love, that is able to pour into the children in order to keep cycles and curses from going to the next generation?
Please discuss about how to handle wrong suitors. They think you are available to them when you are not!
This was so great!!
28.43, was a prophecy to me. thank you
I'm glad I stumbled upon this on my own unique journey thank u for all the wisdom God's given that u have shared
Wow! Thank you for sharing! So wise and so interesting. I need to hear that 👍🙏
Thank you for bringing these type of question to the table, god bless you all
Lord bless You beautiful young people! Thank you for being voulnerable, to share and b a blessing for others!
❤ Wish You could be my sweet doughters bffs, to give her your godly cunsel n prayers in her fresh married life n motherhood. 🙏
Love n prayers from Hungary!
AMEN BROTHER! This life IS ALL ABOUT CULTIVATING OUR SECRET PLACE!
Excellent! Thank you!
Guys the content is treasure. Thank You for letting us know about your struggles. Greeting Form Germany ❤
Thank you for watching! Grateful that God used this conversation to speak to you. ❤️
This was a really good episode. First time watching. Loved the authenticity and honesty 🌹
Great episode, great timing for me, thank you father, shoutout to Alec and Maddie for telling their story what a good episode and teaching , God bless yall again
Thank you for watching and your support! ❤️
@@athomewiththebeveres ay no thank yall for the content, Love yall 🙏🏼
Oh my gosh please share your story
This is a beautiful, lovely Bv-family 💛 - thank you for all you are opening up through these fresh and real stories 🙏🤍
Wow, thank you for your support!
So good, guys. What a wonderful discussion and such godly ,honesty and perspective.
Thank you for watching and your support! ❤️
38:50 Ahhh, content for future videos, man. Something to do with recovering after divorce with children. I know everyone’s story is different but I LIVE for what the Holy Spirit tells me. Ya’lls videos give me so much to ponder and strap onto my tool belt while navigating through life, so thank you all!
So rich! Thank you guys for creating such valuable content!
Thank you for watching! Grateful that God's using these conversations to speak to you!
God bless you y’all!❤️✝️🙌🏻🙏🏻
I'm so glad he talk about it he admitted that's good news
This was helpful, thank you!
Thank you for this video!! Can i get the info of the microphone you guys are using please?
Thanks for sharing guys!!! ❤
WOW again. This is such good details.
I think when your attractive and single you get a lot of wrong suitors.😂😂
😂
What if your calling is a marriage ministry. What about having Godly offspring? You can't do that without a spouse.
Love this
So good! Thank you
I love that: My red flags became green flags
Thank you for another lovely episode 💗
WOW!!! It’s ok to wonder.
Love and miss y’all thank you for sharing as always ❤
We're grateful for you! Thank you for all your support!
Can you guys do more episodes with Alec and Maddie? 🤍 These conversations are truly a blessing!
What’s wrong with playing Scripture as the infant nurses? Faith comes by hearing and hearing by the Word of God. And of course, live the Life!
Here’s a question as well do you feel like that 4 years between when you last got engaged untill meeting Maddie was your wilderness season Alec ?
Lol. You guys are brilliant! ❤
The study that blames botulism on honey is really hard to find nowadays. But they used very faulty data to conclude that honey was dangerous. They asked the mothers of 70 babies who had botulism what the babies had consumed in the last month. Only 20 had consumed honey within that month. The pharmaceuticals that people use for colicky babies is a lot more dangerous. Plus, when is honey ever mentioned in a negative way in the Bible?
I needed this
Marriage is suppose to be the safe space to figure it out.
Could you do a talk on arguments, my wife us a young Christian and through hardships where my parents have been against her and the loss of friends through my parents adding strife and not showing how thru really are. It's put her off Christianity and I'm still loosely holding on bit it's very hard, we're saying about parting in most arguments. Hope you read this and can pour into this please, I lived her but it's like to stay in the same room is hard.
You need to put your wife above your parents, ‘A father will *leave* his mother and father and become one flesh with his wife’ (Genesis). I understand it can be hard but it really sounds like the enemy is trying to attack your relationship through your parents, and so as hard as it might be, separation and distance from your parents might be best at least in the meantime whilst you build a good marriage foundation with your wife. Hope this helps :)
@@xmissbelieberx it does, I've already put distance between be and my parents, but as Christian and my dad being a pastor, it's not helped the outlook of what Christians are like for her parents and herself.
God patient love for us
It has to first be in me to give it. Nice
great to hear
really good show
people that cheer ing for both
can you please share scripture on the screen when reference from the bible
We do we miss out because of perfection
I love the beveres. I've always thought John bevere sounded a bit Australian
😂
What helped maddy and Alec wait till marriage for having sex , would be good so the young generation can hear and follow their advice . God bless and great show .
right becoming one not finding the one
15:08 to 15:15
22:55 to 23:12
Lol, so cute, she's so tiny, us South African's know what 51kg mean 😂❤️
right don't do that wishing you were with someone else or in another person's shoes don't do it think about Jesus when you are being tempted
So happy Alex and Maddy found each other. Maddy reminds me of myself 33 years no dating kissing etc. PURE..God told me to work someplace when 30. I disobeyed and I lost the guy chose for me. He also disobeyed and settled with a promiscuous woman.God said he had a left over guy for me. Witchcovens have been warring against this guy coming to church. Now I have these divorced guys coming for Mr. Ugh. My pure guy will arrive.
Pure of heart maybe not his past. God has washed it by the blood of Christ!
@@2156cynthia Yes. THE BLOOD of JESUS cries mercy and all of us need the pure blood of a beautiful savior for our sins. Absolutely!! God gives grace to the humble and will give you the grace to walk in purity in mind, body, and spirit. He has empowered us by the might of his spirit. He is our great messiah. He is are all in all. The great I am. The first and last. Let God be magnified, glorified in our lives!!
The word perfect has been used a lot in this episode and we have to remember that perfection doesn't exist on Earth. God/Jesus/The Holy Spirit is the only perfect being! We become perfect when we are glorified after the death of our bodies. I believe when culture of the world makes its place within Christianity, then that brings confusion when those worlds collide. It brings peace when we realize we are perfectly ( because God made us in His image) imperfect ( humanity). When we focus on God's word then confusion ceases to exist and we receive freedom from the expectations of society.
❤❤❤
Something slightly missed, I feel, in the discussion is
To talk about Sex more as the "physical part" of the marriage love relationship, divinely ordered as "an intimate outpouring of the couple's Love for one other"... A sacred Expression of a committed, covenant love. Not merely satisfaction of an appetite.
To talk about sex as the "physical relationship" that it IS versus the so culturally misused and idolized word "sex" ‐seems important-to make the point that Sex for a couple is much
more than "achieving an
orgasm."
(Married 40 years)
I connected with this in a weird way. A lot that Alec said I connected and relate to even though I’m a female. I don’t like saying I love you until I know I’m certain. I hope to find my male Maddie version if that is what God wants. I’m inspired by this.
Marriage is for Godly offspring.