I once met a man who said he was a fan, he wanted to sing in my shanty band But the bottom of his face looked weird, (so weird!) there was skin on his chin that I loathed and feared From his crown to his ear, he was most sincere, but you can't sing shanties if you got no beard! Got no beard, y'got no beard, you can't sing shanties if you got no beard Got no beard, y'got no beard, you can't sing shanties if you got no beard I once met a girl who'd heard sea songs, she came to the show and she sang along But her timing with the shout was slow, (so slow!) she was graced with a face like the morning glow But her holler was a blow from the very front row, said "You can't sing shanties if you can't shout 'ho!'" Can't shout "ho!", y'can't shout "ho!", you can't sing shanties if you can't shout "ho!" Can't shout "ho!", y'can't shout "ho!", you can't sing shanties if you can't shout "ho!" And you got no beard! I once met a guy on a weird machine, had wheels and a bell, no mast to be seen, He was checkin' from a pad of notes, (no notes!) and the wheels got caught on his overcoat, And he fell from the pier clawing at his throat, oh you can't sing shanties if you don't own a boat! Don't own a boat, y'don't own a boat, you can't sing shanties if you don't own a boat Don't own a boat, y'don't own a boat, you can't sing shanties if you don't own a boat And you can't shout "ho!" And you got no beard! I once met a bloke on a tavern floor, he'd had ten beers but I'd had ten more And his piggy little face was pink, (so pink!) he tried to shout the words, but all out of sync With a voice so bad, it'll make you think that "You can't sing shanties if you can't hold your drink!" Can't hold your drink, y'can't hold your drink, you can't sing shanties if you can't hold your drink Can't hold your drink, y'can't hold your drink, you can't sing shanties if you can't hold your drink And you don't own a boat, and you can't shout "ho!", and you got no beard! I once met a sailor, all big and broad, with an eyepatch, parrot, and a long curved sword Had a chest like a powder keg, (big chest!) but he had both shoes and they smelled like eggs I expect he would look better with a wooden peg, 'cause you can't sing shanties if you got two legs! Got two legs, y'got two legs, you can't sing shanties if you got two legs! Got two legs, y'got two legs, you can't sing shanties if you got two legs! And you can't hold your drink, and you don't own a boat, and you can't shout "ho!", and you got no beard! Well, Anna's got no beard, and Davey has a bike. Robby's father-in-law has boats, but won't sing on the mike. And JD can't shout "ho!", because his wife takes much offense, And Andy's got two beautiful hairy legs. But! There's no reason good enough not to join us, so sing along with the very last chorus! (Two! Three! Four!) Got no beard, y'got no beard, you can't sing shanties if you got no beard! Got no beard, y'got no beard, you can't sing shanties if you got no beard! Got no beard, y'got no beard, you can't sing shanties if you got no beard! Got no beard, y'got no beard, you can't sing shanties if you got no beard! And you got two legs, and you can't hold your drink, and you don't own a boat, and you can't shout "ho!", and you got no Beard!
I think the first line of that last bit is, "Well, Anna's got no beard, and Davey has a bike," referring to former member Anna Cornish (thelongestsong.fandom.com/wiki/Anna_Cornish).
My favorite part about this song is that when they sing about how they all break the "rules" of this song, no one mentions any of the Johns not being able to hold their drink. So in short: all of the Johns could drink us under the table, and the only requirement for singing shanties is really being able to hold your drink. In this essay I will-...
Got weak lungs, you got weak lungs, you can't sing shanties if you got weak lungs Got weak lungs, you got weak lungs, you can't sing shanties if you got weak lungs Cause you run out of breath And forget the words And start to black out Cause you're out of shape And you got weak- *cough cough GASP*
Oh, please, this is why you have to be on a boat! You can’t sing shanties in the ocean! You will drown! Whatewer… What can we do with a drunken salior?
Honestly this is such an inspiring song, not sure if I can grow a proper beard yet, but I may be able to do a JD (though worse as I'm blond). Love singing shanties and can't wait to see what you do in the future!
can’t sing shanties if you can’t breathe deep :( I love to sing along with you guys and this song always has me running out of steam halfway through a verse if I’m not careful!
@@hamsandvich8956 Got no sword, got no sword, ya can't go questin' if you got no sword, Got no sword, got no sword, ya can't go questin' if you got no sword,
@@gangrenousgandalf2102 Don’t got a scratch, don’t got a scratch, you can’t go questin’ if you don’t got a scratch and you can’t hold your shield and you don’t own a grail and you can’t shout ni and you don’t have a swoooooord
Beard: *Check* Can shout Ho!: *Check* Own a Boat: *FAIL* Can hold their drink: *Check* Has Peg leg: *FAIL* Pretty sure almost everyone fails 3 & 5. Did anyone check all boxes?.
Me everytime after shaving: I've got no beard, I've got no beard I can't sing shanties if I got no beard x2 No even say Ho Can't sing Ho, can't sing Ho I can't sing shanties not even say Ho x2 'Cause I've got no beard :(
I noticed that I needed to add back all of “between wind and water” to my playlist after apparently all of them became “unavailable in my country” but then I just re-added them and it worked
Maybe y'all could do an album based on stories from the Bible, like Noah's Ark, Jonah and the Whale, Jesus walking on water, Jesus calming the storm, Paul's shipwreck on the island, the giant catch of fish after Christ's command to cast the net over the other side
What are songs like this called? I wanna see a song that has this but it keeps going and has more and more long things, I think it may exist but IDK what this type of song is called so I cant look it up.
POV: The Longest Johns need a new band member and they're telling you the terms and conditions before your interview
one so perfect does not exist
True
Barbosa
“You cant sing shanties if you got two legs”
“Andy has two beautiful hairy legs”
Is Andy the ONLY person in the band, who doesn’t have a peg leg?
Hush, children the John's shall reply
@@wubbabungasbizzareadventur1727 hopefully
Well we never seen their legs in the videos haha
@@richardcsomor8262. Rufford Park Poachers
@@wubbabungasbizzareadventur1727, they have not. But we have confirmed the existence of legs in Rufford Park Poachers
I once met a man who said he was a fan, he wanted to sing in my shanty band
But the bottom of his face looked weird, (so weird!) there was skin on his chin that I loathed and feared
From his crown to his ear, he was most sincere, but you can't sing shanties if you got no beard!
Got no beard, y'got no beard, you can't sing shanties if you got no beard
Got no beard, y'got no beard, you can't sing shanties if you got no beard
I once met a girl who'd heard sea songs, she came to the show and she sang along
But her timing with the shout was slow, (so slow!) she was graced with a face like the morning glow
But her holler was a blow from the very front row, said "You can't sing shanties if you can't shout 'ho!'"
Can't shout "ho!", y'can't shout "ho!", you can't sing shanties if you can't shout "ho!"
Can't shout "ho!", y'can't shout "ho!", you can't sing shanties if you can't shout "ho!"
And you got no beard!
I once met a guy on a weird machine, had wheels and a bell, no mast to be seen,
He was checkin' from a pad of notes, (no notes!) and the wheels got caught on his overcoat,
And he fell from the pier clawing at his throat, oh you can't sing shanties if you don't own a boat!
Don't own a boat, y'don't own a boat, you can't sing shanties if you don't own a boat
Don't own a boat, y'don't own a boat, you can't sing shanties if you don't own a boat
And you can't shout "ho!" And you got no beard!
I once met a bloke on a tavern floor, he'd had ten beers but I'd had ten more
And his piggy little face was pink, (so pink!) he tried to shout the words, but all out of sync
With a voice so bad, it'll make you think that "You can't sing shanties if you can't hold your drink!"
Can't hold your drink, y'can't hold your drink, you can't sing shanties if you can't hold your drink
Can't hold your drink, y'can't hold your drink, you can't sing shanties if you can't hold your drink
And you don't own a boat, and you can't shout "ho!", and you got no beard!
I once met a sailor, all big and broad, with an eyepatch, parrot, and a long curved sword
Had a chest like a powder keg, (big chest!) but he had both shoes and they smelled like eggs
I expect he would look better with a wooden peg, 'cause you can't sing shanties if you got two legs!
Got two legs, y'got two legs, you can't sing shanties if you got two legs!
Got two legs, y'got two legs, you can't sing shanties if you got two legs!
And you can't hold your drink, and you don't own a boat, and you can't shout "ho!", and you got no beard!
Well, Anna's got no beard, and Davey has a bike.
Robby's father-in-law has boats, but won't sing on the mike.
And JD can't shout "ho!", because his wife takes much offense,
And Andy's got two beautiful hairy legs.
But!
There's no reason good enough not to join us,
so sing along with the very last chorus!
(Two! Three! Four!)
Got no beard, y'got no beard, you can't sing shanties if you got no beard!
Got no beard, y'got no beard, you can't sing shanties if you got no beard!
Got no beard, y'got no beard, you can't sing shanties if you got no beard!
Got no beard, y'got no beard, you can't sing shanties if you got no beard!
And you got two legs, and you can't hold your drink, and you don't own a boat, and you can't shout "ho!", and you got no
Beard!
NO NOTES
Very minor thing, but i noticed it after a few listens, he actually says two, three, five lol
I think the first line of that last bit is, "Well, Anna's got no beard, and Davey has a bike," referring to former member Anna Cornish (thelongestsong.fandom.com/wiki/Anna_Cornish).
I believe he sings Anna's got no beard, cause she's the only female member of the longest johns
Pretty sure it's Dave, he has a bike, not Davey has a bike. Cuz Dave is a member but Davey is not.
Ahh yes the five genders: man, girl, guy, bloke, and sailor
I identify as a guy
i identify as a sailor for now on
Bloke
*I identify as a steam packet ship and this offends me*
Drink the sailor potion to breathe underwater and later on you can sing
My favorite part about this song is that when they sing about how they all break the "rules" of this song, no one mentions any of the Johns not being able to hold their drink.
So in short: all of the Johns could drink us under the table, and the only requirement for singing shanties is really being able to hold your drink.
In this essay I will-...
part one: the Neolithic revolution
I like how the final verse implies that they can all hold their drink.
You can't? 🤨
Got weak lungs, you got weak lungs, you can't sing shanties if you got weak lungs
Got weak lungs, you got weak lungs, you can't sing shanties if you got weak lungs
Cause you run out of breath
And forget the words
And start to black out
Cause you're out of shape
And you got weak- *cough cough GASP*
Oh, please, this is why you have to be on a boat! You can’t sing shanties in the ocean! You will drown!
Whatewer…
What can we do with a drunken salior?
Probably the best comment on RUclips.
As someone with asthma, I agree with this.
Problem: I can do all of these things and I'm still bad at singing! Please help!
How many legs do you have
😆😆
Jim Duma lol
@@jimduma6355 best guess? three.
you got no voice!
ya got no voice!
ya can't sing shanties if you got no voice!
The one person who disliked this video must've had no beard
lmao
,had two legs, couldn’t hold his beer, had no boat, and couldn’t shout “ho!”
And the other 5 had two legs, cant hold his drink, had no boat, and cant shout HO!
Seven people with not beards, can't shout ho, hasn't a boat, can't hold his drink, and has two legs.
Unfortunate.
9 mateys with no beard
"And Jady cant shout Ho because his wife takes much offense"
Underrated line
What a perfect, silly fun time this song is!
"JD can't shout ho because his wife takes much offense" xD
Who does y'all's album artwork, its always great!
Damm it I want to sing shantys :(
Lol 😆
Got no beard, got no beard, you can't sing shanties if you got no beard,
Got no beard, got no beard, you can't sing shanties if you got no beard!
did you listen to the whole song?
Honestly this is such an inspiring song, not sure if I can grow a proper beard yet, but I may be able to do a JD (though worse as I'm blond). Love singing shanties and can't wait to see what you do in the future!
Good luck with that and I’m sure you look great regardless
I'm in the same boat, blond and can't grow a beard =n= Doesn't stop me from singing along though c;
I don't drink, I can't grow a beard and I have two already messed up legs
can’t sing shanties if you can’t breathe deep :(
I love to sing along with you guys and this song always has me running out of steam halfway through a verse if I’m not careful!
I'd put this on my work song playlist if I didn't think it'd make me giggle too much
Well, I have a beard on the top of my head, so does that count?
I've got a full-body beard everywhere but my face. I think I'm more than qualified, gentlemen.
Why Does This Remind Me Of The Camelot Song From "Monty Python And The Holy Grail"?
Hey, can’t be a knight of Camelot without Longsword
@@hamsandvich8956
Got no sword, got no sword, ya can't go questin' if you got no sword,
Got no sword, got no sword, ya can't go questin' if you got no sword,
@@gangrenousgandalf2102 Don’t got a scratch, don’t got a scratch, you can’t go questin’ if you don’t got a scratch and you can’t hold your shield and you don’t own a grail and you can’t shout ni and you don’t have a swoooooord
this video: a
me, with no beard: :(
EDIT:
the ending: a
me, with no beard, can't sing ho, dont own a boat, cant hold my drinks and have two legs: :)
"Jamie can't shout ho 'cause his wive takes much offence."
well, atleast now the "i should buy a boat" -meme makes sense.
This establishes that all The Longest Johns can hold their drink.
I don't drink, I like both my legs and I don't have a beard
But sir, I need both of my legs... my legs're where my beard is
When I was at summer camp they had songs like these and it got me thinking that this would do great there
as a beard having shanty lover I'm opposed to this gatekeeping 😂
“There’s no reason good enough not to join us”
Longest Johns application form
So I guess you can all hold your drink? That’s the real dealbreaker then.
12 days of Christmas for pirates
this song song is an unrelenting onslaught of words and that makes it so fun to sing along to
Lyrics: no beard
Auto-generated captions: NO BITCH
No bitches?
My brother listens to you and played this song in the car so, all I can say is.
I found you
Tell him that he has good taste in music
Beard: *Check*
Can shout Ho!: *Check*
Own a Boat: *FAIL*
Can hold their drink: *Check*
Has Peg leg: *FAIL*
Pretty sure almost everyone fails 3 & 5. Did anyone check all boxes?.
I can check 4, no peg leg though unfortunately. T-T
Allister Crow I know a guy
@@thetyler7401 This is fair, he must be a true pirate.
I may be able to check 3 does a stack of rafting tubes count and I'm not of drinking age yet and no peg leg
I'll take your leg
the only logical conclusion from the first two verses is that the girl does in fact have a beard
2 years of life lessons you can learn from this comment
Honestly my take-away from this is that all the johns can hold their drink
I memorized the ultimate showdown of ultimate destiny back in the day and by God I will memorize this
I love the implication that at least one of them has a prosthetic leg
This song is so fun.
Awesome shanty!
This is sick, keep it up boys
I wanna see zz top, sing sea shanty's now.
damn didnt expect gatekeeping in the sea shanty community
the literal singular dislike is from a man who's obsessed with his beard.
a nonexistent beard
A music video of this would seriously be glorious-
i grow a beard.... but i have to shave once a month for the Army :(
I'm on a quest to find someone, anyone sing a shanty badly. However this is a difficult task as shanties are made by drunk pirates
The one dislike is the guy that doesn't have a beard
I caught these guys live on spammals stream. Sold out show at golden sands.
Seems to me like the only real condition for singing shanties is being able to hold your drink. Makes sense.
Great, now I have to grow a beard, buy a boat, turn 21, and cut off my left leg.
Damn, you guys are epic!!!
Me everytime after shaving:
I've got no beard, I've got no beard
I can't sing shanties if I got no beard x2
No even say Ho
Can't sing Ho, can't sing Ho
I can't sing shanties not even say Ho
x2
'Cause I've got no beard :(
Alternate reality where Phineas and Ferb is a TV-PG netflix series:
Sea shanty season has come upon us
I've failed every criteria but hey, the song slaps
Just found you guys .. omg love it
When are we getting your pegleg reveals?
I don’t have a starter Mustache a kayak and I get quote on quote drink on non-alcoholic sparkling cider and a missing middle toe
This song was so funny I died.
Sooo I more have a chin patch than an actual beard. Does that mean I can't see along to this awesome song?
Favoritest Wan! 😝
Oi, don't be a gatekeeping landlubber!
I got no beard
Then no shanties for you.
I have a moustache (had a beard until yesterday), can shout ho and can hold my drink and it can be argued I have 3 legs (hohoho).
Ironically this I cant sing this, but I can do Mary mack at full speed.
I thought it was got no beer 🍺
Wait did this song mention a microphone? Is this not a traditional shanty?
Oh wow you guys wrote this. Amazing!
Can you sing shanties cuz you got no beard due to navy regulations?
BIG CHEST😂
damn i cut my leg off for what
Good thing I have no interest in singing shanties.
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Well. I think I’m out of the job
ah fuck me man, got two legs and no boat, damn, can't sing the shanties.
I don't drink, got two legs and no beard
The JD joke was funny
I just need to lose a toe
I've been wanting to be able to grow a beard for years, you don't need to rub it in...
AYE GROW BEARDS MY LADS SO U CAN SING WITH MEEEH
15 people got no beards
I'm four for five, I just need to lose a leg and I'm good to go.
The dislikes are from people who have no beards
cries in being 31 and unable to grow a beard
Quick question
Does anyone know why the official video for this song isnt available anymore?
I noticed that I needed to add back all of “between wind and water” to my playlist after apparently all of them became “unavailable in my country” but then I just re-added them and it worked
What if I have three legs then can I sing
how this kind of song get dislikes.
They got no beard
But half of you don't even have beards?
I'm singing this.. but I don't have a beard
The police would like to know your current location
what is this a job aplication?
Big Kyle's mom is a bitch vibes
This is a song about gatekeeping... -_-
Anyone else here after watching Shantytok?
Does my chin fluff count?
Maybe y'all could do an album based on stories from the Bible, like Noah's Ark, Jonah and the Whale, Jesus walking on water, Jesus calming the storm, Paul's shipwreck on the island, the giant catch of fish after Christ's command to cast the net over the other side
What are songs like this called? I wanna see a song that has this but it keeps going and has more and more long things, I think it may exist but IDK what this type of song is called so I cant look it up.
They're called shanties or folk songs.