Not that they're gonna see this, but, Mark, that was absolutely *not* a beginner's parkour course, and yes, they do exist. A proper foundation in parkour starts simple, the very first thing they will teach you in a proper course is how to fall or land correctly from heights, tumbles, jumps, basic vaults, etc. This is the absolute first step you *need* to know in parkour is how to fall/land the right way, so you don't have exactly what happened to you and that other guy happen 🤣 In short, the guy who was responsible for advertising was either an idiot or an asshole. Either way, great story.
@@sacysily8968 Yeah, I'd think in any high-risk sport the "beginner's course" isn't the first jump or the first flight or anything, it's supposed to be how to not die. I mean, I still appreciate certain high-risk sports, such as wing-gliding or paramotor or even base-jumping, but I still remember how when I was a kid a veteran wing-glider tried to beat a world record and accidentally veered too far off course and died from hitting something at flight speed (which because of the record he was trying to beat was close to 200 mph.) The first thing you should learn is to not die, not how to jump, because even when you're an expert, shit can go wrong, and that can end badly.
I assume the motorcycle video is separate from the scooter story. (I forget which video that is from if you haven't seen it, but I believe it was the "biggest waste of money" video though).
Agreed. I actually sent this to my dad who despite never pursued higher education/ collage; despite how I swear compared to the people at his job who should not be working any sort of machines (let alone a electric pencil sharpener*) but he's done stuff that are this crazy. Ex: "underage" bull riding; and sledding in the snow with a Car door. *I swear that when I tell people about the kinds of people my dad works with in a Company that builds planes for the Government, I not only state how alarming it is that some of these people are allowed to work with anything that involves a healthy mental state and basic logical decision making skills and they some how lack despite being Alive for as long as they have. But some people even ask me "don't tell me the specifics I do not wanna know anymore" and they sound amused and slightly scared/dumbfounded by this.
I think my favorite thing is when they're talking about Mark and Bob bunking their beds in college, they're like "Of course we didn't measure anything, we aren't measurers"... ....isn't Mark there for ENGINEERING
I'm in college for engineering and my roommates did this exact thing but in REVERSE. One of them is mechanical and the other was math but there was ZERO planning and absolutely no regard for safety
fun tip for anyone else living in america-- if you find yourself in a situation like mark, injured with no health insurance, just go to the hospital anyway. but make sure it's a federally funded hospital, not a private one they won't arrest you for not paying your bill, if you can't-- it'll fuck up your credit, and you'll get a bunch of scary phone calls, but that's _better than being physically injured for life_ also, most federally funded hospitals have some level of charity, contact their financial aid department and you can get your bill anything from slightly reduced to, if you fit their requirements and got lucky with your hospital choice, completely voided if someone knows more, please add or correct
Adding to this, if he was under 21, or you are, pediatric urgent cares or hospitals almost always have some sort of help for people who don't have hospital insurance
I have heard of bills being sent to collections but never someone getting arrested for not paying a medical bill (maybe it's different in different states, but not in NY)
@@alexandrarubiera4824 Well of course they get sent to collections. Companies make a shit ton of money buying and selling that debt, did you know that? It's a whole business model, not unlike how "back in the day" (since they're doing it again now, which is why the housing market is ballooning again, so keep yourself safe. 🤫) banks would bundle shitty mortgages that had no credit basis (meaning that they knew that they weren't going to be paid, and many of them were over 90 days delinquent) from mortgage bonds and sell them to each other, and then bet on them being solid when they knew they were shit; turns out abusing the fact that people can't pay for basic utilities or services is very profitable, and it's even more profitable when the market fails, since the medical debt bought from a hospital by one agency can be sold down the line through several agencies for pennies on the dollar which makes the company that finally beats the debtors bloody to get the money back much more money than the companies before it would have. For the medical debt specifically, there's a John Oliver clip about it on RUclips that can explain it, and it's also a good clip because him and his show often prove how easy it is to do shitty things by doing it themselves, and when they made a debt collection agency themselves, they bought a massive amount of medical debt, and instead of collecting on it like they were legally permitted to, John and his show personally paid all the debt off, which was awesome, so it's worth a look, if you're interested.
for credit issues as long as you make at least a payment of $5 per month they cannot put it on your credit. Don't let them tell you that they're putting you on a financing plan literally use the automate system pay $5 once a month and that's it. Also they're usually is a no insurance discount program
How mark nor bob got hurt from bunking their beds with parts of a cloths hanger in place of metal pins, or how Mark survived failed parkour is pretty incredible, and not in the good sense
HI IM SOMEONE WHO KNOWS ABOUT PARKOUR! What mark did and why it worked: He technically (and very roughly) did something called a Three Point Slap Out. You drop from a high place, land on the balls of your feet (never the heel you'll shatter your calcaneus), bend your knees to crouch (slowing your descent), and bring your hands down to slap your palms on the ground (transferring some of the remaining momentum from your upper body down your arms). The main point to reduce damage from a drop is to reduce speed which increases stopping time, but, as the time you take to stop moving. Have fun, READ UP, and stay safe.
Someone concerned for the health and safety of others but knows nothing about parkour: Maybe practice from smaller heights. With pads to land on and crap.
In terms of stories, here's my line up per person Bob: His fridge, which is universally the best story ever told in this podcast Wade: The Pregnancy Test in "A Waste of Money" Mark: The Dead Roomba in "Pet Stories" Edit: Hello new viewers! The line up has now changed as of April 20 hahahahah!
@@the2m736 Oh definitely hahahahah! This comment was just my line up at the time but after hearing the pregnancy test one, full on bawled 😂😂😂 The fact that some of his funniest stories are anatomy-related AND the fact that I’m a med student studying anatomy just makes those stories way funnier
That was my first thought. Someone either saw him and called 911 or he caved and called them himself. I mean broken ribs are a pretty nasty break to get.
I thought I would never laugh harder at a Distractible episode than I did at "Bob's Fridge", but I think some of the parkour and bunk bed stories managed to top that. My stomach was actually in pain from laughing so hard.
Same. This episode is tied for 2nd place with the Funniest Joke episode. Bobs fridge is always gonna be first. When I first heard it I choked laughing so hard.
I remember my dad being against us being in the top bunk when we would sleep, because he thought we would fall out forgetting we were up there. I remember how I thought that no one could ever make that mistake. You proved my dad correct Mark. I'm just glad you were okay after doing that.
Ive slept in a bunk(top bunk) at least 3 times. The first two times were terrifying cause there wasn't a railing. But the third time felt safe cause there was a railing. So just make sure to get a bunk bed with a rail and you should be fine. My cousin has one.
As a child I rolled off the top bunk numerous times while sleeping, and not once did it ever wake me up. I even did it *_over_* the guard rail a few times 😶 Needless to say, I was eventually banned from sleeping on the top bunk for fear of me getting myself killed while sleeping, especially since I was also prone to sleepwalking as well 🤗
@@jenniflower6569 I don't know, but I was at that level 😅 The weird thing is that, despite having been able to sleep through that, I would wake up if the power went out. Actually, I *still* wake up if the power goes out, but I don't think I'd continue sleeping through falling off the bed anymore. Edit: Then again, maybe it just depends how tired I am... 🤔
I was at a friend's house on the top bunk and I fell off apparently and in the morning I woke up and I look up at the ceiling then at my friends and said what happened and they said oh you feel off the top bunk and I'm just sitting there like oh ok
adolf sax went through a lot before he invented the saxophone. maybe in the future mark is going to invent a musical thing that some time travelers hate and want to not be invented in a similar fashion
I'm a little more concerned for the kid with several broken ribs and other internal injuries. Did he turn out alright? Did he walk beyond the hills and just drop dead?
@@elementalgamer0732 I hope that he was ultimately okay, and that he eventually stumbled upon this podcast, listened to that story and was like "Wait holy shit that guy from that parkour thing I did in college who fell on his ass was MARKIPLIER?"
I listen to 1 of these every day (or at least until I catch up) and listening to them is just so relaxing and entertaining. These guys will never know who I am and yet to me they're family. Best friends. Whenever I am depressed these guys just make me feel better.
God, Mark's shoulder story reminds of when I screwed up my shoulder. I'd stepped out onto my apartment's stairs outside to go somewhere, in the winter. They had NOT de-iced the stairs or put any sand or salt down. As I stepped down, both feet shot out from under me and I went down. To keep my back from snapping on the stairs, I put my arms and elbows down to catch me. Came down really hard and bounced down three stairs. I thought I just bruised my shoulder and arm badly. Couldn't really lift it over my head after the first day, and it just hurt in general. Two weeks later I'm with my then-girlfriend and my best friend at a party at our place, and I've got that arm on the table, and I lean forward to get something. There was a loud, grisly POP-snap and I was like "OW!" ... but then realized that half the pain I'd been feeling evaporated almost instantly. I roll my shoulder and I can move it past where before I couldn't. "...I think my shoulder popped." They looked at me in horror, and were like "are you okay?!" And I thought about it and told them about the fall, and shrugged my newly-relocated shoulder "... and I think I just popped my shoulder back in. It must have been dislocated." I lived with a dislocated shoulder for 2 weeks cuz I didn't know it was OUT. Lol. My shoulder isn't as good as it used to be, but it's a hell of a lot better than when it was popped out. Lol
Off yeah i get that i once like seriosly cracked my back. My grandma told me many times: 'Lift with your arms, not your back!' Well i didint care lol. It felt easier to lift heavy things that way untill one day when i was carrying like 15KG Heavy boxes filled with nails. A sudden *CRACKS* Sound came from my back. I threw the box on a nearby table and collapsed on the floor gasping for air and grunting in pain. I tried to get up but my legs whould just constantly shake and the pain in my back was just overwhelming. So i crawled to my living room and climbed on my sofa and layed down and called my Grandma with my Phone. I coudnt walk for the rest of that day and even the next day i had to take suport from walls. My back was extremely painful for another week untill it returned to normal. From that day ive allways lifted with my arms no matter how heavy the thing im carrying is.
imagine being those guys from the parkour group, thinking both of these dudes are totally dead now, and then coming across this video and finding out that one of the people who got injured is markiplier
Whenever I’m feeling kinda down- which is a lot lately with the state of the world- I listen to Bob’s Fridge. It cracks me up every time. I bet I’ve listened to it 5 times minimum. This podcast is absolutely wonderful. Not every episode is a banger- but there are banger moments. And then the epic ones have me crying laughing.
DAMN YOU! My 21 yr old daughter has been listening to Mark since well.. I canne remember... BUT, more recently, since she has returned from University, since being "made" to listen to 4 or 5 podcasts.... We Both eagerly await a new one every Monday on Spottywassit. Discovering this today.... I feel I have to plough _ALL_ of these to sait my hunger after indulging in the "Heist" ... "SPACE 1" and "SPACE 2" (yah, yah, DID watch those too 'live' when released!!!) Wade, your resiliance in the face of follical depletion.. I salute you, Sir! Mark, your tenacity in "birthing" SPACE 1 & SPACE 2.. I salute you, Sir! Bob, I can but offer my sympathy and upmost understanding (as a home owner) through the trials and tribulations of what I will simply refer to as "The fridge incident".. My Heart goes out to you. (PSsssst : Bob, why do you keep on working with those to amatures!! Thanks to you and the "beep, beep beep, you know" from SPACE 1 .. something my daughter and I do to each other now as become our "in-joke!" AWESOME!)
I'm not from Cincinnati, but I _am_ from Newport, KY, so as soon as Bob got to the motorcycle story, my immediate thought was, "Holy shit, I probably know the exact parking lot he's talking about." Newport's a tiny town and there's a grand total of 2 churches that are large enough to have their own dedicated parking lots. Awesome story, Bob xD .
Markiplier story and the part when he was talking about his shoulder really got to me. Recently I decided to start doing sword fighting which I love. But when I took a really bad hit cuz I didn't know how to Parry correctly and because of it I ended up having to get a shoulder replacement. But befor that for least six months before my surgery I could not lift my left shoulder above my neckline so I understand.
I hope you’ve done all the physical therapy they asked of you plus more. Shoulder and knee replacements are really tough and if you don’t stretch like you’re supposed to, you’ll never get full mobility back.
Still eagerly waiting for Hold my Beer moments part 2. Hopefully it'll happen someday. Love this podcast. This episode so far is my absolute favorite. The Bunking the beds story and Bob's Motorcycle story...so good.
some of my favorite Distractible moments: 1. That one story about the couple who got into a fight while kayaking 2. The loft story 3. Bob's fridge 4. The pilot episode These are ranked by how hard I laughed at them :)
28:48 this was my freshman year college experience, i had a lofted bed and the people who lived above me had sex like every single night. and nearly every day once a day it sounded like someone spilled marbles all over the floor and i was so frustrated because i just wanted to know what the ever-loving fuck they were doing to make that noise every day
something dropping on the ground... so urine maybe? Urine, coming from a male, makes repeated splash segments on flat surfaces... coulda been urinating on one another...
Oh my god, you had a marble person too? Every year so far (I’m in my third year of college) the person above me seems to drop a bag of marbles every. Single. Night. At around the same time.😭😭
Jesus, the whole parkour story makes me crave fully-covered healthcare for all young adults (frankly everyone) as well as clear explanations for young dumb college kids that "Your squishy, squishy human body can break, and you can become permanently disabled and/or end up with chronic pain for the rest of your life. Bravado is not enough and never was. You must prepare and practice and strengthen yourself for any physical activity. It is fun and cool to not hurt yourself, which you absolutely can do, far more easily than you think." Like I've been physically cringing so hard
it's wild that they called that "amateur parkour CLASS", that was an intermediate actual parkour course. A parkour class happens on trampolines with padded walls and blocks to practice jumps and flips and lands and vaults etc etc. With a teacher, very importantly. Holy shit.
The funnier part, majority of colleges make health insurance required for attending classes and will place a hold until you either get insurance independently or purchase through the university's partner (the latter is very expensive). I don't know if this was the case back then but I know it is now
when mark said he heard sirens, I thought it was an ambulance coming to pick up his dead friend after fell on his face and possibly broke a bunch of ribs lmao
I just started listening to their podcast on Audible and I absolutely love it and I love the stories I'm not one that likes a lot of podcast but they convinced me
I really appreciate that you guys upload these to RUclips too. My signal is iffy and sometimes RUclips works better than Spotify. I need to listen to something while I clean and Distractible distracts me from how much I don’t want to be doing it lol. I also use RUclips when my boyfriend is listening with me cuz your avatars bounce when you talk and it helps him keep up since he doesn’t know your voices well. Thanks guys!
God these podcast episodes get me through work lmao. They are so entertaining to listen to. I love them. I chuckle to myself a lot with an earbud in. It’s great
12:02 One of my favorite things about Mark and Bob is just all the Brian Reagan jokes that I can relate to. "Get some leaves...you know Kevin....you know how his legs bend this way...its not bending that way....and since you were going to the store later anyway...you might just want to take him to the hospital.....and if you get peanut butter get smooth!"
As someone who slept in a "bunk bed" situation for the better part of 8 years that was only supported by cheap wooden dowels (of which definitely snapped at some point and the bed was quite literally balancing on the other) I can say this story is incredibly accurate.
My favorite thing is when he talks about the sirens and he doesn't think got one second that those sirens are most likely for the kid that broke his ribs XD
I loved showing this to my husband because he just grabs his head n says, "it scares me that this man was almost an engineer" and I've not laughed so hard since the fridge story. Love these guys.
This is by far my favorite episode! I always recommend this one when I introduce people to your podcast! You guys crack me up and I always look forward to the next episode. All of you are really good at telling stories. Wade is my favorite!!!
Someone probably already said this somewhere but I imagine the guys took off in the van and a good five minutes later realised the part was still in the van, they had a whole debate about it, and finally drove back and did a drive by box dump
As someone who is only a few years younger than these guys and a fellow Cincinnati resident, hearing Bob call Ohio an abyss with five cities absolutely sent me. It's so fucking true 😂
Me and my hubby were listening to the one about bob's fridge and he was just dying in the driver's seat. We were on a 15 hr drive to Texas so we listened to every episode on the podcast. Any time that mark would go to his deep voice it would go over his stereo system like thunder 🤣
I absolutely love bob's story. Especially after he switched to auxiliary gas tank. Hitting every gas station seems to me like a game loop... Refuelling bike, restoring vitals and buying upgrades along the way... That was greate 😁
Mark's story is a pure reason why America's healthcare system is a WTF. Sleep off wrecked shoulder and spine. Yeah, why not! Why the f there is a situation when living with messed up shoulder and crucial back pain is cheaper than cure it once after the incident? It's just blows my mind
I’m sitting here eating lunch watching these guys and the animations feel like they are actually talking to me and explaining a story and it’s not a podcast rather a hangout session at the lunch table .very nice
Mark’s parkour story is even WILDER when you’re a University of Cincinnati student and you know EXACTLY where everything happened lol
My thoughts exactly. I can picture almost to a tee exactly what they were doing and how close yet far any good medical attention would be for them.
Not that they're gonna see this, but, Mark, that was absolutely *not* a beginner's parkour course, and yes, they do exist. A proper foundation in parkour starts simple, the very first thing they will teach you in a proper course is how to fall or land correctly from heights, tumbles, jumps, basic vaults, etc. This is the absolute first step you *need* to know in parkour is how to fall/land the right way, so you don't have exactly what happened to you and that other guy happen 🤣
In short, the guy who was responsible for advertising was either an idiot or an asshole. Either way, great story.
@@sacysily8968 Yeah, I'd think in any high-risk sport the "beginner's course" isn't the first jump or the first flight or anything, it's supposed to be how to not die. I mean, I still appreciate certain high-risk sports, such as wing-gliding or paramotor or even base-jumping, but I still remember how when I was a kid a veteran wing-glider tried to beat a world record and accidentally veered too far off course and died from hitting something at flight speed (which because of the record he was trying to beat was close to 200 mph.) The first thing you should learn is to not die, not how to jump, because even when you're an expert, shit can go wrong, and that can end badly.
Fellow Bearcat here! I was like "omg I can picture this whole experience now"
@@sacysily8968 he's both
Bob is such an amazing story teller. This motorcycle story, his fridge story, and the kayak trip story are my favorite
What episode does he tell the kayak one?
@@drey6361 It's the Camping episode
@@eltornaydo6414 I was curious too thanks!
I assume the motorcycle video is separate from the scooter story. (I forget which video that is from if you haven't seen it, but I believe it was the "biggest waste of money" video though).
@@ZodiacCSin I’m not sure about the scooter one but I know the motorcycle is from the hold me beer one
I think this is such an underrated episode- young Mark parkour-ing in fingerless gloves is an image engraved in my mind now
Ikr. This is my favorite episode.
Its hold my beer it’s not underrated if you know what HOLD MY BEER
Welp it's a animation now
Lol yeah
Agreed.
I actually sent this to my dad who despite never pursued higher education/ collage; despite how I swear compared to the people at his job who should not be working any sort of machines (let alone a electric pencil sharpener*) but he's done stuff that are this crazy. Ex: "underage" bull riding; and sledding in the snow with a Car door.
*I swear that when I tell people about the kinds of people my dad works with in a Company that builds planes for the Government, I not only state how alarming it is that some of these people are allowed to work with anything that involves a healthy mental state and basic logical decision making skills and they some how lack despite being Alive for as long as they have. But some people even ask me "don't tell me the specifics I do not wanna know anymore" and they sound amused and slightly scared/dumbfounded by this.
When Bob said that Mark said “Good air up high!!” That is the most Mark thing ever, I could perfectly imagine the entire story 😂😂
Indeed
I can see it vary vividly. I also now noticed how similar my and marks personalities are.
"Because Ohio is an abyss with 5 cities in it" lmaooo perfect description
I wanted to tell Bob “dude I’m from Missouri we are an abyss with like 2 cities. Kansas City and St. Louis that’s literally all we got” 😂😂
As someone from Ohio I can vouch for that
@@SallySue9725
I'm from Kansas, the closest we have is Wichita lmao
@@plbster lol a lot of the Midwest just does not have a lot going for it 😂
As a fellow Ohioan, I can confirm. Very accurate
I think my favorite thing is when they're talking about Mark and Bob bunking their beds in college, they're like "Of course we didn't measure anything, we aren't measurers"...
....isn't Mark there for ENGINEERING
I think it was bio-engineering, but still, that’s not a measurer!
*I could've been an engineer...*
I'm in college for engineering and my roommates did this exact thing but in REVERSE. One of them is mechanical and the other was math but there was ZERO planning and absolutely no regard for safety
maybe it's good he didn't become one
Have you never MET an engineer? Sounds about right to me
Bob is SO GOOD at telling stories I was totally captivated by his voice
I love his Markiplier impression 😂😂
Oh and the Bob's Fridge was simply perfect
@@jenniflower6569 his mark impression is like not accurate but somehow so good
Hearing the bunkbed story, I'm a bit grateful Mark didn't become an engineer.
well there wasnt really much he could do to bunk the beds otherwise
if mark became an engineer instead of a youtuber, overpopulation wouldnt be a problem
I’m with him liking the bunk being a tight squeeze.
Well, anyone can build a bridge that stands, but only an engineer can build a bridge that barely stands.
lEts lOFt the BEdss
as one who’s heard every episode, i’ll let you guys know that this has been my favorite
Same! And Bobs Fridge
I had a feeling it would be lol
This one with bobs fridge second
Bob's fridge is top tier
The fridge one was hilarious too😂👍
fun tip for anyone else living in america--
if you find yourself in a situation like mark, injured with no health insurance, just go to the hospital anyway. but make sure it's a federally funded hospital, not a private one
they won't arrest you for not paying your bill, if you can't-- it'll fuck up your credit, and you'll get a bunch of scary phone calls, but that's _better than being physically injured for life_
also, most federally funded hospitals have some level of charity, contact their financial aid department and you can get your bill anything from slightly reduced to, if you fit their requirements and got lucky with your hospital choice, completely voided
if someone knows more, please add or correct
Adding to this, if he was under 21, or you are, pediatric urgent cares or hospitals almost always have some sort of help for people who don't have hospital insurance
I have heard of bills being sent to collections but never someone getting arrested for not paying a medical bill (maybe it's different in different states, but not in NY)
@@alexandrarubiera4824 Well of course they get sent to collections. Companies make a shit ton of money buying and selling that debt, did you know that? It's a whole business model, not unlike how "back in the day" (since they're doing it again now, which is why the housing market is ballooning again, so keep yourself safe. 🤫) banks would bundle shitty mortgages that had no credit basis (meaning that they knew that they weren't going to be paid, and many of them were over 90 days delinquent) from mortgage bonds and sell them to each other, and then bet on them being solid when they knew they were shit; turns out abusing the fact that people can't pay for basic utilities or services is very profitable, and it's even more profitable when the market fails, since the medical debt bought from a hospital by one agency can be sold down the line through several agencies for pennies on the dollar which makes the company that finally beats the debtors bloody to get the money back much more money than the companies before it would have.
For the medical debt specifically, there's a John Oliver clip about it on RUclips that can explain it, and it's also a good clip because him and his show often prove how easy it is to do shitty things by doing it themselves, and when they made a debt collection agency themselves, they bought a massive amount of medical debt, and instead of collecting on it like they were legally permitted to, John and his show personally paid all the debt off, which was awesome, so it's worth a look, if you're interested.
I could imagine that even back then Mark was still the "I'm not a masochist, I just want to see how much my body can take" guy
for credit issues as long as you make at least a payment of $5 per month they cannot put it on your credit.
Don't let them tell you that they're putting you on a financing plan literally use the automate system pay $5 once a month and that's it.
Also they're usually is a no insurance discount program
"They destroyed my body and bailed"
There's just something about the way Mark said this that makes this line so underrated
The amount of Near-Death experience Mark has told is hinting that he is the main character of the show
How mark nor bob got hurt from bunking their beds with parts of a cloths hanger in place of metal pins, or how Mark survived failed parkour is pretty incredible, and not in the good sense
I buy it.
HI IM SOMEONE WHO KNOWS ABOUT PARKOUR!
What mark did and why it worked: He technically (and very roughly) did something called a Three Point Slap Out. You drop from a high place, land on the balls of your feet (never the heel you'll shatter your calcaneus), bend your knees to crouch (slowing your descent), and bring your hands down to slap your palms on the ground (transferring some of the remaining momentum from your upper body down your arms). The main point to reduce damage from a drop is to reduce speed which increases stopping time, but, as the time you take to stop moving.
Have fun, READ UP, and stay safe.
Nice job with the explanation! 👍🏻
Why did his spine break tho
@@5AMUR-41 good question.
LET'S FIND OUT
Someone concerned for the health and safety of others but knows nothing about parkour: Maybe practice from smaller heights. With pads to land on and crap.
@@trashgremlin9055 No that's not cool
In terms of stories, here's my line up per person
Bob: His fridge, which is universally the best story ever told in this podcast
Wade: The Pregnancy Test in "A Waste of Money"
Mark: The Dead Roomba in "Pet Stories"
Edit: Hello new viewers! The line up has now changed as of April 20 hahahahah!
Mark's "Perfect Crime" with smithers, is a close one for me.
wades pregnancy tests story is really up there too
@@the2m736
Oh definitely hahahahah! This comment was just my line up at the time but after hearing the pregnancy test one, full on bawled 😂😂😂
The fact that some of his funniest stories are anatomy-related AND the fact that I’m a med student studying anatomy just makes those stories way funnier
I know now what to watch after this, Pee Hole?
King of meat is awesome
Someone must make animations of them doing what they are talking about.
Lixian is the artist, i recognize the style.
@@Dumb_Anml I think they mean they want someone in the fandom to animate the stories they're talking about ;o;
@@Dumb_Anml Yeah, but it's not really "animated"
His dream just came true for the bunk bed story
@@StormPrince38913 yeh
For the parkour story, what if the siren they heard was an ambulance for the guy with the broken ribs 😭😭
Oh god that could be true 😭😭💔
Dammit now that idea is stuck in my head
That was my immediate thought too
Thats what I thought he was going to say!
That was my first thought. Someone either saw him and called 911 or he caved and called them himself. I mean broken ribs are a pretty nasty break to get.
man broke his ribs and his wallet
I thought I would never laugh harder at a Distractible episode than I did at "Bob's Fridge", but I think some of the parkour and bunk bed stories managed to top that. My stomach was actually in pain from laughing so hard.
Same. This episode is tied for 2nd place with the Funniest Joke episode. Bobs fridge is always gonna be first. When I first heard it I choked laughing so hard.
I remember my dad being against us being in the top bunk when we would sleep, because he thought we would fall out forgetting we were up there. I remember how I thought that no one could ever make that mistake. You proved my dad correct Mark. I'm just glad you were okay after doing that.
Ive slept in a bunk(top bunk) at least 3 times.
The first two times were terrifying cause there wasn't a railing. But the third time felt safe cause there was a railing. So just make sure to get a bunk bed with a rail and you should be fine. My cousin has one.
As a child I rolled off the top bunk numerous times while sleeping, and not once did it ever wake me up. I even did it *_over_* the guard rail a few times 😶
Needless to say, I was eventually banned from sleeping on the top bunk for fear of me getting myself killed while sleeping, especially since I was also prone to sleepwalking as well 🤗
@@arianamarkus5041 how heavy of a sleeper do you have to be, to not wake up from a falling bunk-
@@jenniflower6569
I don't know, but I was at that level 😅
The weird thing is that, despite having been able to sleep through that, I would wake up if the power went out. Actually, I *still* wake up if the power goes out, but I don't think I'd continue sleeping through falling off the bed anymore.
Edit: Then again, maybe it just depends how tired I am... 🤔
I was at a friend's house on the top bunk and I fell off apparently and in the morning I woke up and I look up at the ceiling then at my friends and said what happened and they said oh you feel off the top bunk and I'm just sitting there like oh ok
Another "how the hell is Mark not dead" story.
I'll be honest, I'm starting to think that Markiplier is secretly William Afton...
@@DukGoQuak nah not William, but I'm know for sure he's a secret afton.
@@prince-tcat_dragon
He always comes back
this is just the start of his masochist story
adolf sax went through a lot before he invented the saxophone. maybe in the future mark is going to invent a musical thing that some time travelers hate and want to not be invented in a similar fashion
R.I.P. Marks Spine and Bobs body heat. Lol
I'm a little more concerned for the kid with several broken ribs and other internal injuries. Did he turn out alright? Did he walk beyond the hills and just drop dead?
@@elementalgamer0732 I hope that he was ultimately okay, and that he eventually stumbled upon this podcast, listened to that story and was like "Wait holy shit that guy from that parkour thing I did in college who fell on his ass was MARKIPLIER?"
I totally get it. I drunkenly set myself on fire, (second degree burns) and was just like " I'm fine, I just need to go home and go to bed"
what
“Tis but a scratch”
full story when
@@choosegamingfps2032 as soon as I could get enough followers on my twitch to justify streaming again lol
@@cordicans6158 EVERYONE FOLLOW THEM NOW
I absolutely enjoy it every time they talk about their college days! There's a specific vibe to them that always crack me up
These podcasts gave me my new favorite hobby: listening to distractible and drawing
Me too!! I'm an illustrator so I'm constantly drawing and this podcast is a saving grace
This is fucking genius why haven't I been doing this
Me too I geuss
LECHONK
The image of Bob riding down the road looking like a rolling gift shop is forever immortalized. 🚲🎁
I just imagine Mark falling out of bed like the wife from Beetlejuice while Bob tries to gather what the fuck is going on 😆😅😂🤣
I listen to 1 of these every day (or at least until I catch up) and listening to them is just so relaxing and entertaining. These guys will never know who I am and yet to me they're family. Best friends. Whenever I am depressed these guys just make me feel better.
same bro same
I like how Mark and Bob can describe an event that took place in about 2 seconds for 10 minutes
God, Mark's shoulder story reminds of when I screwed up my shoulder. I'd stepped out onto my apartment's stairs outside to go somewhere, in the winter. They had NOT de-iced the stairs or put any sand or salt down. As I stepped down, both feet shot out from under me and I went down. To keep my back from snapping on the stairs, I put my arms and elbows down to catch me. Came down really hard and bounced down three stairs.
I thought I just bruised my shoulder and arm badly. Couldn't really lift it over my head after the first day, and it just hurt in general.
Two weeks later I'm with my then-girlfriend and my best friend at a party at our place, and I've got that arm on the table, and I lean forward to get something. There was a loud, grisly POP-snap and I was like "OW!" ... but then realized that half the pain I'd been feeling evaporated almost instantly. I roll my shoulder and I can move it past where before I couldn't. "...I think my shoulder popped."
They looked at me in horror, and were like "are you okay?!"
And I thought about it and told them about the fall, and shrugged my newly-relocated shoulder "... and I think I just popped my shoulder back in. It must have been dislocated."
I lived with a dislocated shoulder for 2 weeks cuz I didn't know it was OUT. Lol. My shoulder isn't as good as it used to be, but it's a hell of a lot better than when it was popped out. Lol
Off yeah i get that i once like seriosly cracked my back.
My grandma told me many times:
'Lift with your arms, not your back!'
Well i didint care lol. It felt easier to lift heavy things that way untill one day when i was carrying like 15KG Heavy boxes filled with nails. A sudden *CRACKS* Sound came from my back. I threw the box on a nearby table and collapsed on the floor gasping for air and grunting in pain. I tried to get up but my legs whould just constantly shake and the pain in my back was just overwhelming. So i crawled to my living room and climbed on my sofa and layed down and called my Grandma with my Phone. I coudnt walk for the rest of that day and even the next day i had to take suport from walls. My back was extremely painful for another week untill it returned to normal. From that day ive allways lifted with my arms no matter how heavy the thing im carrying is.
imagine being those guys from the parkour group, thinking both of these dudes are totally dead now, and then coming across this video and finding out that one of the people who got injured is markiplier
Me and my partner both ride motorcycles. We were both listening along to Bob's story, relating so hard and chuckling to ourselves. Such a good story 😂
Whenever I’m feeling kinda down- which is a lot lately with the state of the world- I listen to Bob’s Fridge. It cracks me up every time. I bet I’ve listened to it 5 times minimum. This podcast is absolutely wonderful. Not every episode is a banger- but there are banger moments. And then the epic ones have me crying laughing.
I'm just imagining mark falling like loonie toons style XD
the parkour dudes look back and theres just a perfect mark shaped hole in the grassy patch that goes down several feet
@@spartanking9807 thank you for this image
DAMN YOU! My 21 yr old daughter has been listening to Mark since well.. I canne remember... BUT, more recently, since she has returned from University, since being "made" to listen to 4 or 5 podcasts.... We Both eagerly await a new one every Monday on Spottywassit. Discovering this today.... I feel I have to plough _ALL_ of these to sait my hunger after indulging in the "Heist" ... "SPACE 1" and "SPACE 2" (yah, yah, DID watch those too 'live' when released!!!)
Wade, your resiliance in the face of follical depletion.. I salute you, Sir!
Mark, your tenacity in "birthing" SPACE 1 & SPACE 2.. I salute you, Sir!
Bob, I can but offer my sympathy and upmost understanding (as a home owner) through the trials and tribulations of what I will simply refer to as "The fridge incident".. My Heart goes out to you. (PSsssst : Bob, why do you keep on working with those to amatures!! Thanks to you and the "beep, beep beep, you know" from SPACE 1 .. something my daughter and I do to each other now as become our "in-joke!" AWESOME!)
I'm not from Cincinnati, but I _am_ from Newport, KY, so as soon as Bob got to the motorcycle story, my immediate thought was, "Holy shit, I probably know the exact parking lot he's talking about."
Newport's a tiny town and there's a grand total of 2 churches that are large enough to have their own dedicated parking lots. Awesome story, Bob xD .
Lmao gotta love the "hold my beer" moments. These moments have to be recorded put it into the world for entertainment.
Markiplier story and the part when he was talking about his shoulder really got to me. Recently I decided to start doing sword fighting which I love. But when I took a really bad hit cuz I didn't know how to Parry correctly and because of it I ended up having to get a shoulder replacement. But befor that for least six months before my surgery I could not lift my left shoulder above my neckline so I understand.
I hope you’ve done all the physical therapy they asked of you plus more. Shoulder and knee replacements are really tough and if you don’t stretch like you’re supposed to, you’ll never get full mobility back.
Acxual sharpened swords? Why on earth whould you do that? Thats stupid! Tell me that you atleast had safery gear.
Still eagerly waiting for Hold my Beer moments part 2. Hopefully it'll happen someday.
Love this podcast. This episode so far is my absolute favorite. The Bunking the beds story and Bob's Motorcycle story...so good.
Still my favorite episode. Just the funniest story, Marks story especially destroys me every time XD
The joke about the ad read is even funnier when there isn't even an ad read put in there.
God, I love Distractible without ads.
some of my favorite Distractible moments: 1. That one story about the couple who got into a fight while kayaking
2. The loft story
3. Bob's fridge
4. The pilot episode
These are ranked by how hard I laughed at them :)
I love this podcast so much. I’ve made a habit of listening every Monday at work. It really makes starting the week easier.
When mark mentioned the sirens I thought he was going to say that the guy who broke his ribs got taken to the hospital
someone tell mark HE'S NOT SUPPOSED TO WORK HIS SPINE AT THE GYM XD
NO PAIN NO GAIN I swear I’m not a masochist
-probably mark Edward fishbach
I mean, you're supposed to keep your spine straight
@@5AMUR-41 and your core engaged but that isnt working out your spine lol
Personal favorites:
10:10 First Parkour Fall
15:07- Favorite Parkour Moment
20:30- Bunk bed
32:37- Longest Coldest Shittiest Night
28:48 this was my freshman year college experience, i had a lofted bed and the people who lived above me had sex like every single night. and nearly every day once a day it sounded like someone spilled marbles all over the floor and i was so frustrated because i just wanted to know what the ever-loving fuck they were doing to make that noise every day
Ayo?
something dropping on the ground... so urine maybe? Urine, coming from a male, makes repeated splash segments on flat surfaces... coulda been urinating on one another...
Oh my god, you had a marble person too? Every year so far (I’m in my third year of college) the person above me seems to drop a bag of marbles every. Single. Night. At around the same time.😭😭
Bob's laugh is the best lol. Makes me laugh everytime. Very wholesome and sincere
The story of the bed is now animated but still absolutely hilarious 😂
"We refuse and jecuse" a new slogan for them to add to the list lol.
I'm so glad I've started listening to this podcast🤣
Most underrated moment of this episode: Bob retelling how Mark's GoXLR died. That "OH G-" is the funniest thing i've ever heard.
Jesus, the whole parkour story makes me crave fully-covered healthcare for all young adults (frankly everyone) as well as clear explanations for young dumb college kids that "Your squishy, squishy human body can break, and you can become permanently disabled and/or end up with chronic pain for the rest of your life. Bravado is not enough and never was. You must prepare and practice and strengthen yourself for any physical activity. It is fun and cool to not hurt yourself, which you absolutely can do, far more easily than you think." Like I've been physically cringing so hard
it's wild that they called that "amateur parkour CLASS", that was an intermediate actual parkour course. A parkour class happens on trampolines with padded walls and blocks to practice jumps and flips and lands and vaults etc etc. With a teacher, very importantly. Holy shit.
The funnier part, majority of colleges make health insurance required for attending classes and will place a hold until you either get insurance independently or purchase through the university's partner (the latter is very expensive). I don't know if this was the case back then but I know it is now
It made me cringe so hard aswell. "Boys will be boys", would a lot of people say. It's sooo dangerous
@@alexia3552 yeah that’s what I was thinking
@@alexia3552 lagzmq
when mark said he heard sirens, I thought it was an ambulance coming to pick up his dead friend after fell on his face and possibly broke a bunch of ribs lmao
As a regular motorcycle rider I totally feel that motorcycle story.
This is definitely top 5 favorites for me, but also:
FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, I NEED THE STORY OF MARK AND BOB'S ONE PARTY. I JUST DO. PLEASE.
Bob's Fridge: the After Credit Scene, so good just waiting for the animation or recreation from the boys
Starts at 2:14
All their blank faces at the beginning had me laughing and it didn't even start 🤣😂
This is legit the most underrated episode there is. By far my favorite episode
I just started listening to their podcast on Audible and I absolutely love it and I love the stories I'm not one that likes a lot of podcast but they convinced me
For those who are coming from the animation it starts at 20:41
Could you give me the name of the animation? I can't seem to find it
Mark and Bob Bunk Their Beds.
@@JJScene ruclips.net/video/J9aqqehJSg0/видео.html
I really appreciate that you guys upload these to RUclips too. My signal is iffy and sometimes RUclips works better than Spotify. I need to listen to something while I clean and Distractible distracts me from how much I don’t want to be doing it lol. I also use RUclips when my boyfriend is listening with me cuz your avatars bounce when you talk and it helps him keep up since he doesn’t know your voices well. Thanks guys!
I keep running into podcasts where Wade “absolutely crushes it” and I’m just like, “When can I hear one of *his* stories?”
10:32 Mark's mouth opened when he hit his desk.
God these podcast episodes get me through work lmao. They are so entertaining to listen to. I love them. I chuckle to myself a lot with an earbud in. It’s great
12:02 One of my favorite things about Mark and Bob is just all the Brian Reagan jokes that I can relate to. "Get some leaves...you know Kevin....you know how his legs bend this way...its not bending that way....and since you were going to the store later anyway...you might just want to take him to the hospital.....and if you get peanut butter get smooth!"
27:06 idk why, but i think this is one of my favorite things mark has ever said. it kills me every time
As someone who slept in a "bunk bed" situation for the better part of 8 years that was only supported by cheap wooden dowels (of which definitely snapped at some point and the bed was quite literally balancing on the other) I can say this story is incredibly accurate.
My favorite thing is when he talks about the sirens and he doesn't think got one second that those sirens are most likely for the kid that broke his ribs XD
I loved showing this to my husband because he just grabs his head n says, "it scares me that this man was almost an engineer" and I've not laughed so hard since the fridge story. Love these guys.
This is by far my favorite episode! I always recommend this one when I introduce people to your podcast! You guys crack me up and I always look forward to the next episode. All of you are really good at telling stories. Wade is my favorite!!!
"nonbrand nutritious liquid" why did I immediately think of del Monte corn water lmao
Someone probably already said this somewhere but I imagine the guys took off in the van and a good five minutes later realised the part was still in the van, they had a whole debate about it, and finally drove back and did a drive by box dump
Guys I love this podcast, I usually get really bad morning anxiety and you're just making me giggle it away, this is great!
As someone who is only a few years younger than these guys and a fellow Cincinnati resident, hearing Bob call Ohio an abyss with five cities absolutely sent me. It's so fucking true 😂
Out of every episode of the podcast, this has gotta be the funniest lmao
Every time I watch Distractable I forget they have Baldemort do the voice-over and I love it
The visualization of "if I had sneezed, I would have broken my nose" has me IN STITCHESSSS
Props to the guy who jiggles the characters in order to simulate talking for a whole hour
It's almost certainly done procedurally
Me and my hubby were listening to the one about bob's fridge and he was just dying in the driver's seat. We were on a 15 hr drive to Texas so we listened to every episode on the podcast. Any time that mark would go to his deep voice it would go over his stereo system like thunder 🤣
Mark the magnifying magnificent magnet,
Bob the Brilliant and Bold
And Wade the wonderful Waiter
I absolutely love bob's story. Especially after he switched to auxiliary gas tank. Hitting every gas station seems to me like a game loop... Refuelling bike, restoring vitals and buying upgrades along the way... That was greate 😁
I don't know why but I love Wade's concerned "Oh no." after Bob talks about laying his bike down on his leg.
Bob's Fridge will never be boring. I go back to it a LOT
The fact that markiplier has not yet died is undeniable proof of a higher power.
I've been waiting to hear more from Bob. Ik he has his own channel bit he's always been so hilarious to me, I've been wanting to hear him talk more
Such a great podcast for doing anything like recording videos or live streaming so thank you for making the podcast. P.S. its hilarious as heck.
Bob's fridge was the 1st one I listened to and I almost died from oxygen deprivation
This is by far my favorite episode so far
this is probably one of my favorite episodes lmaooo
Waiting on a "Hold My Beer pt.2" now.
We need more stupid college stories from these 3
I would love to actually have video of these. Seeing their reactions would add so much to this and I’d never turn it off.
the story of mark falling out of bed I laughed so hard
Mark's story is a pure reason why America's healthcare system is a WTF. Sleep off wrecked shoulder and spine. Yeah, why not! Why the f there is a situation when living with messed up shoulder and crucial back pain is cheaper than cure it once after the incident? It's just blows my mind
Cause America's fucked up
Bob's motorcycle story actually makes me want a motorcycle. Going on a road trip like that actually sounds fun, despite the various mishaps.
Just wanted to say that this is the favorite one for me
Seriously, I wouldn't mind a whole episode about Mark and Bob's college stories, cause it sounds like they have some pretty good ones.
This is my favorite episode in all episodes out yet and it's fellowed closely by...the fridge
I’m sitting here eating lunch watching these guys and the animations feel like they are actually talking to me and explaining a story and it’s not a podcast rather a hangout session at the lunch table .very nice
Literally listened to this while driving back from my freshman year of college. I just about cackled at 53:24
Mark's Parkour accident might be part of the reason why he's so short. LOL
Of all of the episodes they've made to today, this one I think is my favorite. x3