Son: Dad, why is my sister named Peace? Dad: Because your mother thinks the World needs peace. Son: Thank you, Dad. Dad: No problem, The Video game Man.
@@Fern995 This comment has been suggested to the NWO to be redacted. Official NWO policy requires that any characters crossout/erased/removed/cancelled/charred/boldened/altered/eliminated/etc. from reality without NWO supervision will be flagged as requirement of a ban. Your local NWO will reach out to you in a minimum of (ERROR) days.(Difference in time is reliant on Rifting technology of your universe/timeline) Please note that if you do not comply, you will also be removed from reality. NWO reminds you to have a splentastic now, and to remember to support your Local NWO Collection Agencies! (End Automated Message)
What this guy has most going for him are his whispering voice and his gentle presentation. He is completely aware of what you are; that this world is too often miserable madness. But he is speaking to us from anorher one - another world. And he does beautiful work.
You've heard of the Candy Man... You've heard of the Sammich Man... You've heard of the Condiment Man... You've heard of the Beverage Man... You've heard of the Cheese Man... You've heard of the Snack Man. Now get ready for... _T H E M A N_ * 1.5 months later * Rift you son of a bitch lol
was i the only one bracing myself and my ears for when he said "oh, and before i go any further."? because i really thought a massive loud THIS VIDEO WAS SPONSORED BY RAID SHADOW LEGENDS
Plot twist: all of the candy mans clones are secretly agents of the governments, and the plan was not to make humans more subservient, but to have only one seller of these products, making them able to charge significantly more.
You've heard of death and his four horsemen But now get ready for The Candy Man The Snack Seller The Beverage Broker The Condiment Creator The Sandwich Seller And The Cheese Conisour
Man, In Oaxaca (the third poorest state of Mexico) They Banned selling junk food to minors (anyone under 18). They treat a bag of cheetos and doritos like a beer or tequila
Man, like, I tried to find good asmr, but there is nobody like this guy. His old school, doesn't struggle when Talking, man, like, I find ASMRtists with over 2 million subs, i could record myself shitting, and it would be better than those ASMRtists. You should have over a million subs!!!
His ASMR is special, its also very good. I honestly dont mind watching this guy and falling asleep. It keeps me intrested to watch, stay, then slowly fall asleep. This guy is great.
@@jaimorris4962 Yeah and it's all because of the people who refuse to stay inside or use a mask and because of the government who doesn't want to pay it's people or take care of them enough so they can survive and actually stay inside
The first 10 seconds: **immediatly paralyze me** My cup: falls off my table Me: manages to catch it somehow without looking Also me: so this is the power of ultra instinct
Me: Bye mom I’m going to talk to this man in the dark alley with sketchy clothes and some stuff in a briefcase! Mom who’s on the phone: Alright go ahead do whatever
You can call me... *The snacc man* In your universe there is apparently a lot of rift-delivery people similar to candy man. That's actually so interesting!
The way you do Asmr is weird, but weird in a good way. It's like you took Asmr and made it an art. You add some comedic effect and some dark tones to your Asmr and I find that really unique!
I once was the snack man, in school selling starbursts, dairy milk even Coca Cola. I’ve seen it all, not everyone is cut out for the job but once ya snack you can never go back!
This would honestly be a better dystopian book or subject to learn about in English would rather listen to this to learn about dystopia even over the giver
If you've ever seen Gus Johnson's 'pillow guy' video... Imagine a man enters your living room at night with various bags of chips and cans of Pringles taped all over his body. _I'm snack guy, the snackiest guy in town!_ _look at how crunchy my exterior is!_ _I've had a lot of people _*_leave me recently_*_ and I could really use some snacks!_
This man has an amazing imagination he comes up with really good content probably even when it’s hard to come up with content so for the great videos and unmatched imagination and interesting content and effort that goes into making these I’d like to say thank you
Teacher: No eating food in class!
That one kid in the back of the class:
That was me. I was always hungry.
@@jeanpierrepolnarref3352 sane
Underrated comment 😆
@@ILLUMINATION313EVO no
@@ILLUMINATION313EVO I was thinking the same thing, honestly.
Plot twist: there’s a seventh man, The muffin man.
Do you know him?
I like cupcakes but i much rather prefer muffins (*unintentional chuckle about how ridiculus this is*)
But what about the eighth man, *M A N*
shit..
He is seated at the utility muffin research kitchen, reaching for an oversized chrome spoon
This is actually the true story of that one kid in school who would sneak in sweets and sell them to the rest of us on the sly 😂
I'm that kid in school
Hush...
"heres your mentos"
"That'll be $1.50"
NoobenGaming YT 😎
A.J. Smith Entrepreneur 😅
You guys go to school in juvie or something?
Son: Dad, why is my sister named Peace?
Dad: Because your mother thinks the World needs peace.
Son: Thank you, Dad.
Dad: No problem, The Video game Man.
Bruh
_2_ comments with alot of likes wow
This aged like fine wine
His mom may have -thought- the world needed peace...
But the dad knew we all needed -The Video Game Man-
@@Fern995 This comment has been suggested to the NWO to be redacted. Official NWO policy requires that any characters crossout/erased/removed/cancelled/charred/boldened/altered/eliminated/etc. from reality without NWO supervision will be flagged as requirement of a ban. Your local NWO will reach out to you in a minimum of (ERROR) days.(Difference in time is reliant on Rifting technology of your universe/timeline) Please note that if you do not comply, you will also be removed from reality. NWO reminds you to have a splentastic now, and to remember to support your Local NWO Collection Agencies! (End Automated Message)
This is the kid they warn you about in the math problems.
Little Timmy never did share his 500,000 orange slices
Lmfao
lol
He protec
He attac
But important
He serve snac
Noice
HILARIOUS AND ORIGINAL
High quality content
he give the snacc
Yass
A new character enters the Rift
Congrats on 600K Uncle E.
*Super Clemmons Bros. Ultimate*
THEY'RE
ALL
HERE-
Seems op- pls nerf
There is an "er" missing in your name. It should be "Deutscher Soldat" :)
Now 1.6 million😳
@@miti2222 its actually 1.1 million
"... The equivalent to 1/8 of your soul... ... ... or three US dollars..."
Glad to know my soul has a market value of $24.
Bro fuck that my soul's worth 64 bottle caps, sign me up
@@adudeontheinternet8246 I can buy 4 nuka colas with that!
Jeez and i thought satan was ripping 𝘮𝘦 off
24 likes
@alexgenthusiast r/rarecopliments needs to be a thing
Damn Keanu Reeves got hit with the death stranding rain🤔😭
Still have yet to play it 🙄🙄
Timefall
What if ER's video's are what the future actually turns out to be. Not flying cars or anything, a ban on snacks.
There would be like *Massive backlash* if the government tried that
Cities like New York and San Francisco have already started treating soda like cigarettes, so it's not too far off...
The government already tried in America. So lays made chocolate covered chips and marketed the plain ones as "healthy"
oo f New World Order in 2050
69 likes..... NICE
*If you are on mobile*
*Time Stamp:*
0:00 intro & back story
6:30 Sour cream & onion potato chips
9:40 water for palate cleansing & sodium process
18:30 Fun onion rings
22:50 "Cool Ranch" tortilla chips
27:30 White cheddar popcorn
31:44 Nacho Cheese tortilla chips
36:38 Corn Chips
39:48 Potato chips with ridges
43:20 Cheddar cheese sticks
46:28 BBQ potato chips
49:54 Cheese Balls
52:40 Party mix
54:33 Pretzel wheels
58:14 Pretzel Sticks
1:00:53 Cheese Curls
1:03:47 Packing everything back up
1:07:00 Taking your order
1:11:13 Pleasure doing business!
s
Sounds like my grocery list
im not on mobile but you are doing gods work.
I'm using Appel but what a life saver👍
Thank you
Imagine FBI breaking down your door just to confiscate the *_s n a c c_*
FBI:(punch’s me)
Me:(gets my ranch dressing flavoured tortilla chips)
FBI: Ight I’m bouta head out
You will now get a sub
The *T H I C C S N A C K*
Drops the cheese balls!!! We've caught you arrange handed snack man!!!
If you will
What this guy has most going for him are his whispering voice and his gentle presentation.
He is completely aware of what you are; that this world is too often miserable madness.
But he is speaking to us from anorher one - another world.
And he does beautiful work.
Uncle E: imagine...
My consciousness: IGHT IMA HEAD OUT
Government: Ban's beverages
Everything: dies
Government: "Oh do living things need water?"
You've heard of the Candy Man...
You've heard of the Sammich Man...
You've heard of the Condiment Man...
You've heard of the Beverage Man...
You've heard of the Cheese Man...
You've heard of the Snack Man.
Now get ready for...
_T H E M A N_
* 1.5 months later *
Rift you son of a bitch lol
He already is in the state of existence...my man, NO, the man Iggy Manley
Jeff Bridges?
_are you implying that the police are a force of foods distributing government officials?_
At 10:15, he mentions the Cheese Man
@@paradox1359 Thank you, kind sir or madam
i love that he’s a family man. it just makes his videos more warm and welcoming knowing that for some reason. 🤷🏻♀️
Nobody:
The One Guy Who Sneaks Snacks Into The Movie Theater:
LOL
*guard comes in*
Imagine, If you will...
*"gmo rights"*
okay but Why Do You Talk Like This
The Snack Man Returns
The Snack Man Forever
The Snack Man: The Animated Series
All Star Snack Man
Snack Man Beyond
21-Chase Roger Lego Snack Man
Snack man the snack
Snack trek
The Snack Knight
snacks 1 2 and 3
E:Imagine a world where all governments united to ban snacks..
2020:Write that down,Write that down!!
Is this ART? Because I feel it is 👏👏👏👏 Really appreciate the careful crinkles of the bags.
A-art
R-rat
T-tart
Apparently
Really
Tasty
A
Relaxing
Treat ;)
A: It's
R:Rewind
T:Time
👏🏽👏🏽 meme review
was i the only one bracing myself and my ears for when he said "oh, and before i go any further."? because i really thought a massive loud THIS VIDEO WAS SPONSORED BY RAID SHADOW LEGENDS
As opposed to the “crack man” of course.
My favorite man
@Dominic Edwards I plead the fifth
Dominic Edwards wait, but I’m your FBI agent
9
@@luizeduardobrigagaoribeiro7075 8
Plot twist: all of the candy mans clones are secretly agents of the governments, and the plan was not to make humans more subservient, but to have only one seller of these products, making them able to charge significantly more.
Except they also banned money, so.......
I shall knell to my superiors
Sounds about right.
Said The Communist Spy.
You've heard of death and his four horsemen
But now get ready for
The Candy Man
The Snack Seller
The Beverage Broker
The Condiment Creator
The Sandwich Seller
And The Cheese Conisour
Milkshake Merchant
I was lookiing for this comment for ages
I love it great joke but you said (whatever thing) seller twice I don’t want to sound rude but man you can do better then that
Could be The Candy Chap and The Sandwich Server.
Hamburger Hustler
I don’t have a very good life but theres something about this channel that just makes me relax so much 😌
A life is only good or bad if you worry about how others perceive you. All lives are a blessing. Stay positive my friend, and Godspeed
@@MrRuffle yeah being in perpetual starvation and pain isnt a bad thing! it's only bad if you're sad about other people's opinions. Sooo true!!
IT'S THE SNACK MAN
skibidibidi boom bababa
Boom bababa, skibidibidi boom badaba, where's the snack man?
Omg FLASHBACK to the 90s
Butt holes
Wait, is Iggy.... oh my god...
Ski bope bap ba dope bope, bope bap ba dope bope
He has corn chips AND cheese balls? I'm in awe of the power this man truly has over this mortal plane.
Me home alone when there’s no left overs in the fridge
A hybrid of mukbang, asmr, and story.
Where’s the mukbang part?
@@GrinkMode 1:07:00
@@theconquerer7836 thats the mukbang part?
My favourite warehouse worker
Ephemeral Forklift
oh yuh
LMAO, underrated comment
DarkerThanBlack 👎🏿
Did you just break time?
I DEMAND TO KNOW YOUR SECRETS WIZARD!
Teutonic Knight1190 my favourite pussy Emphemeral clit
The 5 horseman of the apocalypse
“So if you want to dip your chip into your favorite dip, you dip with a ridged chip”. - The Snack Man 2019
There a timestamp?
Chill-Doggo 40:53
POV you are sitting in the back of class/detention and that one kid is sitting next to you 🍽🍽🥗🍲
i like these vids where Rift just sits down and its his breakfast in the dark.
Mr. snackman, bring me cookies and cream, make it the sweetest that I’ve ever seen
I see what you did there
I sweet what you did there
Go to the candy man for that bro
Bring in two flavors like cookies and creamers
*eats some cheese and watches*
Imagine Dr. T asmr teaming up for a video with Empheral rift wouldn't it be Soo cool And tingly
ohhhh that'd be superb!
No! It would be... "TECHNICAL"
0:00 when u about to sell snacks in class
*super long intro about a distopian future
So who wants snacks?
*noboty
@@boopsboops7692 nobootie
I cannot tell you my excitement when I saw this video in my feed.
12:20 when your teachers talks about potato chips but whispers.
Good sir you forgot “week old mall sushi man” but then again, we don’t talk about him...
The funny thing is, this isn't that far off from North Korea...
Hilarious
Mmm yos comedee
*oh shi-*
Man, In Oaxaca (the third poorest state of Mexico) They Banned selling junk food to minors (anyone under 18). They treat a bag of cheetos and doritos like a beer or tequila
*Bursts out in uncontrollable laughter*
Man, like, I tried to find good asmr, but there is nobody like this guy. His old school, doesn't struggle when Talking, man, like, I find ASMRtists with over 2 million subs, i could record myself shitting, and it would be better than those ASMRtists. You should have over a million subs!!!
His ASMR is special, its also very good. I honestly dont mind watching this guy and falling asleep. It keeps me intrested to watch, stay, then slowly fall asleep. This guy is great.
Nobody:
not even a single soul:
ER: "Proceeds to spend over 10 minutes explaining every little detail about the S N A C C"
he protecc
he atacc
but most importantly,
he makes us sleep eating good snacc
*_s n a c c_*
s n a c c
OPERATION RIFT
MISSION: ATTACK OF THE SNACK MAN
Will it be on the Switch?
@@ShannaraTech this is the best comment ever
The kids in the back of the classroom:
Hmmmm idk, the candy man warned me about you.
I'll take some cheetos, though.
lol!!
CHEEBO BEEBO
Crunch
Cheddar cheese sticks* (doing God's work)
Did he say something about him i a previous video??
When he walks in with the leather clothing. You know ur in for a high sensitivity asmr
This guy is living in 2021, while we're stuck in 2020 Covid.
Probably won't be any better if it was like this lmao
Covid will be a fee years probs mate not jsut this year then it gose away
@@jaimorris4962
Yeah and it's all because of the people who refuse to stay inside or use a mask and because of the government who doesn't want to pay it's people or take care of them enough so they can survive and actually stay inside
@@Someone-kf8xe yeah man I feel that
@@gachastorymaker4561 you're stupid
_Cause he's the snack man_
_And he's gonna give a Cheeto to you_
We are close to 600,000 worshipers of Papa Rift. Come join us, let us praise him.
Damn, only 600k 😱
p
Would sound funny if Ralphie said that.
@James Hetfield Catholic bull... lies
My favorite line of his is "Let me guess". I notice he says it all the time.
This video summaries me showing off my amazing lunch to my friends before trading
The first 10 seconds: **immediatly paralyze me**
My cup: falls off my table
Me: manages to catch it somehow without looking
Also me: so this is the power of ultra instinct
My Spidy senses are tingling
5
You should do a roleplay of hank from detroit become human. I think you'd pull it off.
Ik I was thinking the same
Yesss!!!!!😀😀😀😀😀
ABSOLUTELY
[I saw "Hank" and my brainrotten mind went: OmG mAdNeSs CoMbAt HaNk FrOm NeWgRoUnDs DoT cOm?!?!!]
Grats on 600k. One of the very few ASMR channels that has earned every single subscriber.
Thx for the food dad
Hello Rift’s child. What’s it like living with the man himself? Enlighten me BABY OH YEAH YEAH
@@ShannaraTech time for castration
Hes not ur fucking dad
Zoey Nicole's Channel r/whooooooosh
@@zoeynicole7864 r/wooooosh
Me: Bye mom I’m going to talk to this man in the dark alley with sketchy clothes and some stuff in a briefcase!
Mom who’s on the phone: Alright go ahead do whatever
1:07:27
Rift: May i have your name please?
also Rift: *Proceeds to write down uvuvwevwevweonyetenyevweugwemubwemossas*
You can call me...
*The snacc man*
In your universe there is apparently a lot of rift-delivery people similar to candy man.
That's actually so interesting!
The way you do Asmr is weird, but weird in a good way. It's like you took Asmr and made it an art. You add some comedic effect and some dark tones to your Asmr and I find that really unique!
I feel we are meeting in a back alley somewhere.
Love your asmr
*At some points especially the 'packing everything back up how do you keep such a straight face. I would laugh lol*
I once was the snack man, in school selling starbursts, dairy milk even Coca Cola. I’ve seen it all, not everyone is cut out for the job but once ya snack you can never go back!
I automatically read the title in the tune of "I'm the Scat Man"
Me: Ey yo, you got the dust?
Rift: Yea I got the Cheetos.
Me: Not Cheetos.
TAJIN
This has to be to only and first instance of me getting hungry from watching/listening to ASMR.
P.S: Congratulations on 600K subs, Rift.
The only man on youtude that can make a 1 hour and 12 minute long video about fricking snacks.
The way you perform your asmr roles makes me think you would be a good actor.
Condiment man, and beverage man incoming!
What bout Sandwich man? Lol
Mark ASS Brown
@@LifeRewind0119 Mmm *Sammich man*
That Random Bro named Urim he’s had sammich man in a video already
@@samgardner4667 I know, I want more!
Nobody:
The government: NO MORE S N A C C
The candy man: "Oh no!" *Clones himself* "*"Anyways..."*
*When you dont want to get trademarked "cool ranch tortilla chips" "Nacho Cheese tortilla chips" instead of Doritos*
ER looks like the type of guy where if a barbecue was going downhill he'd bring steaks/soda just so everyone is a little happier
I've love this video, I hope the Snack man comes back to fill me another order. Awesome ASMR video as always uncle ER
If his hair was dark he would slightly look like John Wick.
Goddammnit now I cannot unsee it
Wait..wait a damn minute your right!!
This dude's ASMR is actually relaxing
I literally had a dream a couple of days ago where this happened. Thank you Uncle Rift.
Thanos
Ahh yes the cheese man. I met him once in Constipationople. It was a most exquisite visit. Left with a whole new love for stool softies.
mr snack man bring me a dream- make him the cutest boy ive ever seen
I'm so alone I need a snackman to call my own
THE SNACK MAN : "Imagine..."
ME : "Aaaalllll the people !"
Livin' for todaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyy!
Imagine theres no countries
It isnt hard to do
Nothin to to kill or die for
And no religion tooooooo
This would honestly be a better dystopian book or subject to learn about in English would rather listen to this to learn about dystopia even over the giver
Every fat kid's nightmare scenario and ultimate savior in one video. Jokes aside, I love this man's endless creativity and insane world building
This is a pretty solid representation of any unmasked or unvaxxed interaction in Australia or Canada right now.
00:00:00 Intro & backstory
00:06:30 Sour cream & onion potato chips
00:09:40 Water for palate cleansing & sodium processing
00:18:30 Fun onion rings
00:22:50 "Cool Ranch" tortilla chips
00:27:30 White cheddar popcorn
00:31:44 Nacho cheese tortilla chips
00:36:38 Corn chips
00:39:48 Potato chips with ridges
00:43:20 Cheddar cheese sticks
00:46:28 BBQ potato chips
00:49:54 Cheese balls
00:52:40 Party mix
00:54:33 Pretzel wheels
00:58:14 Pretzel sticks
01:00:53 Cheese curls
01:03:47 Packing everything back up
01:07:00 Taking your order
01:11:13 Pleasure doing business
Yeah this distopian world is the europian union
Nah its britian after brexit
He’s the snack man he gets in the ring and starts throwing snacks everywhere
it would be nice to see a man from the future government that is questioning you if you have seen the other men (Snack, candy, beverage, etc)
Did you know that spices and salt have had entire real life wars fought over? You should do a salt man and a spice man!
you had me at "Imagine..."
I miss the candy man series and I hope the snack man turns into a series
Your lighting is on point. Very nice. 👌😛
This makes me want to just feast on snacks so bad
Friend: Oh are those Dortitos?
Me: nah man I got
*NaCHo cHeEsE FlAvOrEd ToRtIllA ChIpS*
Very real
Offbrands in a nutshell
Its 3AM and all the stores are closed and now im hungry. Also imagine rift after this video enjoyng all these delicios snacks
Wind, earth, water, fire, and life with these things combined they form the ultimate asmr channel
I'm the snack man, I throw snacks all over the stage. And then I start eating it
If you've ever seen Gus Johnson's 'pillow guy' video...
Imagine a man enters your living room at night with various bags of chips and cans of Pringles taped all over his body.
_I'm snack guy, the snackiest guy in town!_
_look at how crunchy my exterior is!_
_I've had a lot of people _*_leave me recently_*_ and I could really use some snacks!_
Rift Talking About A United Government Banning Snacks:
Me Casually Eating Churros: go on.....
This man has an amazing imagination he comes up with really good content probably even when it’s hard to come up with content so for the great videos and unmatched imagination and interesting content and effort that goes into making these I’d like to say thank you
Me taking a bite out of bread every time he gives me a sample:
Taste like... bread.
This takes snacking to illegal proportions and I like it.