#closeyourmouthrey Also, I noticed, I sound a bit tired here, idk why, sorry for potential mispronunciations or garbled speech, even my vocal chords were protesting me speaking about this abomination x Patreon (in case of interest, I would highly suggest NOT using an IOS app): patreon.com/Nutsa
That's what happens when you attempt to "write a story" without having a plan, no education, no outline, no sense of dramatic structure, no desire to honor the original material(s), and so forth. Otherwise, all things being equal, competent storytelling is not all that difficult. But it DOES require discipline, consistency, planning, structure, character arcs, thematic underpinnings, etc. NONE OF THESE WERE PRESENT the more KK (and now LH) were handed the keys to the kingdom. :/ It's bloody embarrassing. It's like we gave the dogs free reign of the house after leaving for a month vacation. OBVIOUSLY, they're gonna do ya dirty, lol.
uh, that was being pointed out 4 years ago. it's why we say the name of the last movie is "The Rise of Palpatine" from Nerdrotic to Critical Drinker to Disparu to pretty much everybody else. well i'm not sure RLM is on board with it yet, those boys are still trying to run cover for Hollywood lefties and muh diversity. . in an age where saying that you shouldn't be allowed to call yourself a woman just because you pulled on some nylon stockings this morning gets you labeled a "transphobe", i suppose there isn't any logical reason why Rey Palpatine can't call herself a Skywalker.
@@odnamsrazor2364 Ah yes, the famously....leftist Red Letter Media. The ones who praised diverse movies like....ghostbusters 2016? Who covered for...this movie, somehow??? I legit have no clue what the rest of your statement sentence means though, I guess femboys aren't a thing anymore.
It's kind of like digging the deepest hole in the world: you can only dig downwards so far until you are digging upwards, and then you pop out in China!
I find it A Real Headscratcher (TM) that when Disney needed someone to finish this story, they got the guy who has proven repeatedly that he cannot satisfactorily finish a story.
I just always saw it as "you are the one who fcked that up, now go deal with it". There was no coming back after two really bad movies, so who else would willingly come and attatch their name to such a failure?
@@NiveaCow the two biggest sins, IMHO, were set up in TFA then abandoned. 1) The redeemed Stormtrooper arc 2) the absolute banger chemistry between Boyega and Isaac. SUCH a crime Fynn & Po weren't a couple
@@Sure0Foot honestly, and I will die on that hill: TFA just wasn't good. It was fine (if you didn't really think about it too much), but gave nothing to work with for future movies. TFA ruined the whole thing. TLJ's failure was a natural consequence of emptiness left after TFA.
@@PhelesDragonQui-Gon was a nontraditional Jedi. While the rest of the Jedi order was snifffing their own farts, Qui-Gon was straight real with it, he gambled, used mind tricks for personal gain, went against the Jedi order but overall had a more balanced understanding of the force. If Qui-Gon defeated Maul and trained Anakin, there would have been no Vader. He was the Jedi the galaxy actually needed.
The "Somehow Hitler returned" is the German 2015 film "Look who's back", and it's genuinely quite a good film. Unlike anything Disney produced that year or since.
“A Jedi’s weapon deserves more respect” has the exact same energy as “This will begin to make things right” at the beginning of TFA. JJ kisses your ass while acting like he’s better than you.
@@MegaDarkness5000the worst part about it is that instead of improving the story and continuing the story in the last Jedi. He just being a coward and backtracked, making a what the fuck movie.
@@NoBreakz It really was a pissing contest between JJ and Ryan, both messed with each others movies. Ryan showing why JJ's Mystery boxes don't work and JJ wanting to does own thing while giving Ryan the finger.
the last Jedi was a what the fuck movie when it came out. It narratively acted as the end of the trilogy but in the middle. It closed most story threads but didn't satisfy. TFA didn't provide a great starting point but TLJ burned the house down. ROS built a shack on the remains and it fell apart instantly.
I subscribe to the theory that Palpatine won and took over Rey's body. Palpatine than buries the lightsabers of the skywalkers on the planet where one was a slave, another was made prisoner hidden away from his father's gaze, and one was made into a sex slave to a giant slug. After disposing of their legacy, by literally burying it where the step brother of anakin and the aunt and uncle of Luke were murdered leaving Luke to find their charred corpses. Ultimately, Palpatine steals the skywalker familial identity, legacy, and reputation; as they are all dead through Rey's own efforts, on her behalf, or because she was there.
You briefly point this out at around the 16m mark, but what I found astonishing about TRoS was not that it compulsively retconned everything it remembered from TLJ, but that it actually started retconning *itself* almost immediately. She killed chewbacca! No she didn't. There's only one way out of this planet, and Dameron's girlfriend sacrifices herself to save him. Oh no she didn't, she somehow returned and also took babu frik with her or whatever. They're in a pinch now, the dyed in the wool fascists are about to executen them. Umm, excuse me, Hux was the spy all along. Rey killed Ren. Sykes! She healed him. Rey died! Sykes! she was resurrected. Ren will have to face the world after everything he did. Lol, lmao, haha, he's dead. Even the snake thing doesn't stay dead. There is not a single moment in the film where something significant happens and then just *sticks*. C3P0 gives an entire speech before being effectively killed by losing all his memories, and then *doesn't get killed*. It's legitimately a joke after a while. It obsessively retcons itself, *live*, at most a few minutes after anything happens. Consequently, literally nothing actually happens, and the consequence of that, obviously, is that nothing matters. Not only do events not have time to breath, not only do they not impact the story or the characters in any way, the events themselves only really occur by a technicality, in order to fulfil their apparent narrative purpose of being reversed immediately afterwards. it's a film that comprehensively annuls itself as it goes.
Yup, yup, yup x 100! It's like JJ wasn't certain or confident in ANY CHOICE and they kept doing the "SiKE!!! We got you!" over and over throughout the movie. You listed the examples way better than I could've! Smh... what a disaster. Shit like this makes me SURE that a group of SW fans would have made a better sequel trilogy with a smaller budget, better story telling, no retcons, NO PALP returning "sOmEhOw" etc. It's almost impressive how AWFUL some parts of the sequel trilogy were. So bad... 😭
The existence of such an item, the way it was found, and the way it was utilized absolutely defies all logic... It's actually like some kind of anti-logic.
My favorite meme of that scene is her holding up that knife with that little piece extended, with the caption "To the brave, anything is a sex toy". Once you see it, you can't unsee it
I don't understand their obsession with blowing up planets. In the original movies (the only movies), they built a battle station that had planet destroying capabilities. It wasn't designed to go around blowing up planets, the big gun was there the same as nukes are used, a show of force and deterrent. They used it on Alderan to prove they weren't empty threats. But in these movies, everything is about blowing up planets, the new Death Star is purely for that reason, the fleet of destroyers were only for that reason. It doesn't make sense to destroy planets, you get nothing from it unless using it for leverage from someone else, which they weren't. They were just going around eliminating entire planets worth of resources The writers couldn't think deeper about why they were blowing them up apart from baddies are bad.
There's also the fact that blowing up planets isn't an effective narrative device by its own. Destroying a village where the viewers know the people of has more of an impact than destroying a planet the viewer don't know. Alderan's destruction relied on Leia's reaction to have an impact and it also set up the treat of the Death Star blowing up the rebel base like that later. Remove those two elements and Alderan's destruction would not have mattered.
also add to the fact that if a rebellion gets the hand on one of those destroyer they will be able to blow other destroyers. Controlling and maintaining hundred of destroyers is much harder than keeping a massive fortress afloat. eventually bunch of criminal could also take a destroyer and boom, everyone's dead.
Planet busting obsession in the shitlogy is simply one of the obvious marks of cheap intellects. They took something that had great shock value in the originals, the station that can pop planets, and already has once. And they're like : everyone this is so cool ! And our characters are cooler than the originals ! So they blow more planets, they're better in the blowing planets game ! Coolnesss ! Fan fiction level stories brought to cinema with a billion dollar budget...
@@Crystalgate Exactly. They just didn't understand what the weapon represented and the uses of it. That what I was saying, what was the point in blowing up anything? It didn't teach anyone a lesson, it wasn't for extortion, it wasn't even some lunatic rage thing where someone snapped and is hunting one person and is willing to take an entire planet to do it, it wasn't to make the audience feel the weight of the decision. There is no weight or stakes, you saw a handful get taken out and felt nothing because it was just something that was happening. It is not lazy writing, it is people that never learned to write.
I LOVE that movie so much! I need some The Death of Stalin merch to wear. Maybe a tee-shirt with Jason Isaac's character taking off his coat when he's first introduced, that was awesome lmao. When the son comes in and tells them to stop even though they've already opened his head and you can see his skull was so freaking hilarious. One of my favorite movies I've ever seen! 😂 Also, when they grab the poor doctor and they just leave his dog there... 😂 😢
I'm grateful for the Rise of Skywalker being so terrible that it united a fandom badly divided after TLJ to agreeing, yes, the sequels were a disaster.
@@JohnSmith-tw6po I'd suggest that The Acolyte, KK's pet project since 2020, was far more effective in uniting an already weary Star Wars fan base. Despite all the evangelizing by Hollywood press, it was both the least viewed and most expensive Star Wars show ever made. I just can't see how Disney renews KK's contract in October 2024.
@Valen-mh9fh I genuinely don't know. If I'm being completely honest, I no longer have hope for Star Wars. The Disney brand is in deep decline. Iger came back to fix Disney in 2022, but they're doing even worse than when he returned. We'll have to wait for Favreau's Mando film in 2026 to see which direction Iger wants Star Wars to go, but I'mnot holding my breath. It's no accident it's the only Star Wars film in development and slated to release before Iger's contract is up in 2026.
15:11 "why didn't he just stop?" It's funny you mention that because at one point as Rey is deflecting the lightning, he actually drops his arms to his sides. When he does that he actually stops shooting lightning, and yet, somehow, more lightning is just firing off her two lightsabers. Just shooting off the lightsabers. Spontaneously flying off them and hitting good old Palps. I'm not even joking. It's so bad.
Well, he drops his arms at that point because his death successfully transferred his spirit to Rey and he was just making sure to get rid of any question of if he was dead this time so he could go live his life as his grand daughter.
Palpatine finally mastered the ability to move his spirit (how he lived in clones and was also Snoke) and he just needed to die to take a new form: the body of his granddaughter. Strike him down and he will become more powerful, and she killed him. Why? Because she heard voices in her head. We saw at the beginning of the movie that Palpatine can do that and be every voice in someone's head. What voices does she hear? A bunch of Jedi that Palpatine knew. The voices in her head were Palpatine. He won. Only a matter of time before he burns her out and takes over completely.
When I was a wee lad, we used to play with our action figures in the backyard. We were able to come up with more exciting and cohesive stories with tons of action without even trying…. That’s cause all of us understood we were just kids and we didn’t care if one person suddenly brings in boba fett even though we’re fighting on Endor. Hey that’s cool. But JJ and Rian are two adults in the same backyard and each is throwing their action figures at real kids and saying, YOU WILL LIKE THIS ! YOUR SNOKE THEROY SUCKS KID! Lol
How did Palpatine return? Why on earth did Kylo Ren and Rey kiss? How did Rey gain the ability to Heal wounds? Why would Rey call herself a Skywalker? How was Palpatine's star destroyer fleet built? Why is Finn force sensitive? How did Lando's friends/recruits make it to Exicle? J.J. Abrams: I don't care.
Let's take the questions in order. He used the force ability "force getting better". Because Twilight fans, under the name of Reylos, demanded it. Well, in the video game "Super Star Wars: Return of The Jedi" Luke does have the heal ability. I guess that's cannon now, maybe along with Dart Wader turning into a scorpion from a NES game. How else would the title of the movie be justified? Granted, it wasn't justified anyway. Palpatine pulled it out of his ass with "force ass pull". A lot of RUclipsrs posted interesting sounding ideas of Finn being force sensitive, so JJ just ran with it, but omitted the detail about actually doing something interesting with it. A new technology was invented that allows travel at the speed of plot.
I gave up trying to understand the sequels after the reveal that Hux was a spy for the Resistance. The man we saw cause the scorching of his supposed side's OWN EARTH.
Don't forget that you had to play Fortnite during a limited-time event to actually HEAR the message that Palpatine sent to the entire galaxy announcing his return...
I'd say TFA built an unstable structure which Rian could have stabilized (not to mention he didn't have to kill Snoke or even resolve Rey's mystery box). Rian then went "no one would expect me to kick the structure down!!". Then Abrams had to deal with that mess. Luke could have been on that island looking for some kind of ancient force technique/artifact. He could have had students whose training he was finishing then time jump to avoid Rey being ESB Luke. Snoke didn't need explained. Rey's parentage could have been handwaved by herself "they were early resistance fighters who left me on Jakku for a dangerous mission and I was just in denial". Maz says in TFA that Rey already knows her parents are never coming back so implied dead is fine. TLJ's biggest issue was not doing a fucking time jump.
I remember when my family was going to see TROS. It was the first time ever going to a theater where I genuinely felt depressed before even seeing the movie. That’s how much TLJ destroyed me and still somehow TROS made me more depressed than I ever thought possible.
Yeah, same, me and my brother, and mom were going, brother and I were already joking about how bad it was going to be, it really was a lot worse then are already low expectations.
Still trying to figure out they they thought it was a good idea to make half the new films use the exact same letters in their names as the older films even though they knew perfectly well that fans used acronyms to deal with the long film titles.
Kylo Ren as "the most three-dimensionally acted one-dimensional character" was superb, and sad - so glad to see Driver still working actively, great talent
i dont agree with you. the last jedi feels like it hates us, so it at least makes me feel something. it makes me feel emotions. with rise of skywalker i felt: "oh leia died? whatever. palpatine somehow returned? how yeah sure what else... rey skywalker? sure buddy..." i just felt apathy....
That's because professional writing takes time. You've got your first draft, then revisions, then revisions of your revisions, then editing, followed by more revisions, followed by more editing, and then- if you're lucky- you have a final draft that gets torn to pieces at the filming set requiring more revisions. Then, as you're nearing wrap up of production the studio sends in a bunch of notes requiring more revisions. Such a tedious cost to keep that writer on board for the whole thing. On the other hand, you could just pay the director to write the script and let them do whatever so long as you hit your release date after having to do last minute shoots to attempt and fail at addressing test screening concerns.
because its not about the writing being good, its about Disney-executives pushing their agenda & selling merch. Just look into what happened to the script for "Wish"
The person I feel the most sorry for is Ian McDiarmid, I can only imagine his reaction when Jar Jar Abrams approached him about coming back to Star Wars
I do and I don't feel sorry. Like, I feel sorry that the character he worked so hard to craft over three decades is now just some puppet husk that JJ is throwing up on screen because _REASONS_ ... But I don't feel sorry because he could've at least said no. But if the money is just TOO good, that's fine, go get paid, it's all good. But then at that point, that's a business transaction... it's like saying "I feel sorry that that person sold his spare car". There's nothing to feel sorry about when it comes to a purely business transaction.
@@nickfifteen you can't blame him entirely because you are right, Disney did give him a lot of money for him to return, same for Harrison Ford, so he was just collecting a pay check and going home
Han Solo wasn't force sensitive, so that wasn't his force ghost, even in the movie Kylo says that it's a memory. So Kylo Ren forgave himself for killing Han in the imaginary conversation with him.
8:05 "It would never been able to beat ChatGPT allegations" so this motivated me to ask ChatGPT to write a sequel to episode 7 and 8 and here we are : *Title: Star Wars: Episode IX - The Shadow of the Force* *Opening Crawl:* The galaxy teeters on the brink of chaos. The First Order, under the rule of Supreme Leader Kylo Ren, tightens its grip on countless star systems. The Resistance, though severely weakened, continues to ignite sparks of rebellion across the galaxy. Rey, the last hope of the Jedi, seeks to uncover the mysteries of the Force, following the guidance of the ancient texts. Meanwhile, Finn, haunted by his past as a stormtrooper, begins to sense a growing unrest within the ranks of the First Order’s soldiers. As an ancient darkness awakens, the final battle between light and dark is about to begin... *Act 1: The Gathering Storm* *Rey’s Quest:* Rey, now more attuned to the Force but still struggling with her inner turmoil, discovers a hidden message within the ancient Jedi texts. The message speaks of a dark force, the Eternal Shadow, that predates both the Jedi and the Sith. This entity, known as the Revenant, feeds on the conflict between light and dark, growing stronger as the galaxy descends into war. Rey sets out to find the source of this darkness, believing that it holds the key to ending the conflict. *Kylo Ren’s Rise:* Kylo Ren, now fully embracing his role as Supreme Leader, is haunted by visions of a great darkness threatening to consume him. Determined to solidify his rule and eliminate any threats, he begins to seek out ancient Sith relics, hoping to control this dark power before it controls him. However, he is increasingly isolated, even from his most loyal followers, as the darkness within him grows. *Finn’s Discovery:* Finn, who has become a key leader within the Resistance, begins to hear rumors of stormtroopers who, like him, have broken free of their conditioning. As he investigates, he discovers a growing underground movement within the First Order’s ranks-stormtroopers who are secretly defecting, refusing to fight for a cause they no longer believe in. Finn is determined to help these defectors and bring them into the Resistance, believing that they could be the key to turning the tide of the war. *The Resistance’s Last Stand:* The Resistance, under the leadership of Poe Dameron, is on the run, constantly moving to evade the First Order’s forces. They receive word of a secret alliance of independent systems that are willing to stand against the First Order but are wary of committing fully to the Resistance. Poe and Finn set out to rally these allies, hoping to turn the tide of the war, while Finn simultaneously works to reach out to the stormtrooper defectors. *Act 2: The Awakening of the Revenant* *Rey and Kylo’s Dual Search:* Both Rey and Kylo Ren’s quests lead them to a forgotten world, deep in the Unknown Regions, where the dark side is unnaturally strong. They discover that the Revenant is an ancient being that was once a powerful Force user, neither Jedi nor Sith, who was consumed by the Force itself. This entity seeks to engulf the galaxy in eternal darkness, feeding on the conflict between light and dark to achieve its goal. *The Revelation:* Rey learns that the Revenant is linked to both her and Kylo Ren-through their powerful bond in the Force, they have unknowingly been awakening this dark power. The Revenant reveals that it sees them as its perfect vessels, capable of uniting the galaxy under its rule or destroying it entirely. *The Conflict Within:* As Rey confronts the Revenant’s influence, she is tempted by the power it offers-the ability to end all suffering by imposing her will on the galaxy. Kylo Ren, meanwhile, begins to question his path, realizing that his quest for power has only made him a pawn of this ancient darkness. Their bond intensifies, as they each struggle with their own inner demons and the possibility that they are destined to either save or destroy the galaxy together. *Finn’s Awakening:* As Finn continues to connect with other stormtrooper defectors, he discovers that many of them are Force-sensitive, their latent abilities perhaps linked to their ability to break free of the First Order’s conditioning. This revelation deepens Finn’s sense of purpose, as he realizes that he, too, may have a stronger connection to the Force than he ever knew. He begins to train these defectors, helping them harness their newfound abilities while preparing them for the battles ahead. *Act 3: The Final Confrontation* *The Resistance’s Assault:* The Resistance, having gained the support of the independent systems and with Finn’s stormtrooper defectors by their side, launches a desperate assault on the First Order’s command center. This time, they are not alone-the stormtrooper defectors turn on their former comrades, leading to a chaotic and intense battle. Poe leads the starfighter attack while Finn leads the ground assault, using his knowledge of First Order tactics to outmaneuver their forces. *Rey and Kylo’s Showdown:* Rey and Kylo Ren confront each other at the heart of the Revenant’s power. The Revenant attempts to possess them both, forcing them into a battle of wills. During their duel, they both experience visions of the galaxy’s future-one of endless darkness under the Revenant’s rule, and one of fragile peace achieved through balance. *The Sacrifice:* Realizing that their bond is the key to either the galaxy’s salvation or destruction, Rey and Kylo Ren agree to work together to destroy the Revenant. In a moment of clarity, Kylo Ren embraces his true identity as Ben Solo, choosing to sacrifice himself to weaken the Revenant’s hold on the galaxy. This act of redemption allows Rey to channel the full power of the light side, banishing the Revenant and restoring balance to the Force. *Finn’s Victory:* On the battlefield, Finn leads the stormtrooper defectors in a final push that overwhelms the First Order’s remaining forces. His leadership and courage inspire the defectors to fight with renewed determination, and they succeed in capturing the First Order’s command center, effectively ending the war. *Epilogue:* Rey, now at peace with her identity and purpose, returns to the site of the ancient Jedi temple. She begins training a new generation of Force users, including the former stormtroopers who have discovered their own connection to the Force. These new guardians of the Force are not bound by the old Jedi or Sith traditions but instead seek to maintain the balance that has been restored. Finn, having found his true calling as a leader and teacher, helps guide these new Force users, understanding that his journey from stormtrooper to hero was only the beginning. The final scene shows Rey and Finn, standing together under the twin suns of a distant world, ready to pass on the knowledge they have gained to ensure that the balance is maintained for generations to come.
Damn that's _way_ better than the real thing. I'm not sure that Finn would be able to train force-sensitive people, maybe Rey and him working in concert, but that's an easy fix.
Woaaaaaah. On the one hand, it's hilarious how similar it is to the movie when you look at the structure and the basic plot points. It's also funny how many storylines it tries to cram in, giving every main character their own plotline. You usually have an A and B plot, but this chatbot seems to think more is better by giving C and D plots as well.
Nope. "I am your father," because it set this whole soap-opera shitshow up in the first place. Star wars was fresh and full of untapped potential to expand in amazing directions, and George Lucas had to turn it into All My Children in space.
I watched it twice, it was not in the theaters though, and I did it because the first time, I had the impression that the movie's story was actually about nothing at all, it was almost as if it was an unrelated new space opera film, completely unrelated to anything. From time to time, I rewatch specific scenes of the other two movies, to fantasize they belong to a different version of the trilogy (they're just a very few scenes), this one I never feel like rewatching nothing of it.
@@luisrods right? I sometimes watch the scene that introduces Kylo Ren in episode VII and think "this could have been cool" and then I switch off bc the rest is garbage
@@Reorganiser indeed, the first movie has good isolated scenes. That one is good, just as you noted. Another one that is very good is when Fin and Poe steals the TIE Fighter to escape. In The Last Jedi, there's probably one one for me, when Kylo kills Snooke, behaving like a Jedi; I imagine he redeems right after and Rey falls to the dark side. Those hypothetical movies sometimes play in my head.
@@tillerzeit Ha, ha, ha, ha, just specific scenes (sometimes here in YT), never the whole movies. I think the characters, on paper, were not a bad idea, just awfully written.
That brief glimpse at younger Leia really struck me. I thought it looked bad in theatres. Seeing it five years on, she looks like she's a Raya and the Last Dragon character. The EYES.
It's so embarrassing how this trilogy was handled. Even as early as TFA, it felt less like a cohesive vision someone had to tell and story and more of reactionary response to how people viewed the viewed the franchise. "People thought the Prequels were too much of a departure from the OT, well TFA will literally be just the OT. Wait, people think TFA is too much like the OT, well TLJ will be totally different. Wait, people jow think that TLJ strayed too far from the point of the series, well..." and so on and so forth. ROS is pretty much the culmination of Disney/Lucasfilm's constant scrambling to makes things work because when you don't plan out your story, you get the conflicting narratives of TFA and TLJ and you get characters who are either inconsistent or just straight up wastes of space.
It gets worse than that, JJ Abrams took full advantage of the fact that he wasn't supposed to write part 8 and 9. His film was written by the motto "make it easy for me at the expense of future writers". He planted empty mystery boxes that said future writers would have to fill or fail to fill, made promises and set expectations that they also would have to fulfill and even had Rey prematurely defeat Kylo Ren and thus make it even harder to use him as an effective villain, all that while leaving future writers very little to work with. He also made a "A New Hope" mark II and the other writers would not have been able to get away with making a "Empire Strikes Back" mark II as a common opinion was "we liked the movie, but please make a more original story next movie, okay". This is not something you do if you have a vision.
In 2019, I went into this movie as a Star Wars fan and I left completely apathetic to Star Wars. I can’t even bring myself to watch the old movies anymore.
See I knew all these would be shit, I managed to finish Rogue One and thought that was bad enough, I gave up on the rest. Never watched any of them. So as far as I'm concerned there are six films, and I'm not sure about three of those.
I find it so disheartening specifically because Lucas’ six films (and the to show) always had artistic integrity. He was always more concerned with telling his story right than with making a safe and marketable product. I find it amazing that there are still those who bash him. The funny thing is, the sequels are exactly the mindless, loud movies that have nothing beneath them, that critics accused Lucas films to be. 😅
That's not really true. Wisecracking battle droids, Jar Jar, child Anakin, huge exploding space ships being safely piloted to crash landings though from space by a single pilot in a cockpit. All that silly crap was added just to make it more exciting for kids, no matter how silly it annoying it was. He just managed to preserve a tolerable story during all of it. But he definitely wanted to make it safe and marketable.
TLJ burned me so much that I barely remember it and any potential desire to see this one evaporated. I literally did not care hearing about this movie, beyond thinking it really should have been "The Return of Palpatine" instead.
The most amazing thing is that ABSOLUTELY NOT A SINGLE DROP OF CGI WAS spared.... It's amazing how much they lied about not using cgi and people gobbled that slop up.
Always reminds me of that Top Gear episode where have they Aaron Paul come in to promote his new chase film (sorry, I mean to drive the Reasonably Priced Car), and they happen to discuss his new film, and he goes on to say "yeah, and it's all practical effects, no CGI at all, whenever you see something happen, we really did that, we really wrecked Ferraris and a hundred cars, it was amazing". He says "we have a clip here" and they show this action packed sequence with cars doing like 200mph, rolling over in slow motion, flying through the air, helicopters exploding, etc, obviously mostly fake. And Clarkson is just like "so no CGI at all, really? That's amazing." And Paul is like "yup", but you can see inside he's just thinking "why the fuck did they tell me to say that? Why did I agree to this!?" Amusingly embarrassing.
@@a_fine_edition2746it's hard to tell from within the movies. Pretty much everyone is the same as they were in the first movie. There's also an odd lack of scale. Despite being a galaxy, it feels so small.
@@a_fine_edition2746 Not even a couple hours. TLJ starts exactly where TFA ends, with Rey & Luke on Achto, just with a quick twist from uniting key characters with a powerful, emotional tone, into a whimsical, tired, cranky tone.
@@Valen-mh9fh It's not that the galaxy feels small, but just that it is inconsistent and unexplained. At least in OT we got the idea that Tatooine, Alderaan, Yavin, Hoth, Cloud City, Endor (etc) had some distance between them. PT shows us fairly large distances between Naboo, Coruscant, Tatooine, Kamino, Geonosis, Utapau, Mustafar. But the ST just shows lasers destroying planets, weird sub-light speed travel battles (all of TLJ), light speed skipping (and First Order ships following them on these light speed skipping jumps) & ships basically arriving wherever they need to be, including 1000's of ships being able to navigate a treacherous path to Exegol.
You said it best: this movie is a set of "cool scenes!" put together to fill a checkbox of what all people in the audience are expecting and produce engagement bait marketing, not a story.
you’re absolutely right-it is criminal that these vast sums of money are tossed around so recklessly, by people who wouldn’t recognize a creative thought if it slowly chewed off all their limbs. Lucas took a chance back in the 70s- the $9 million he raised to create star wars a new hope went on to become a billions dollars IP. And aside from all the joy created and imaginations stimulated, let’s look pragmatically at all the jobs that were created over those decades. Kennedy and her cronies and financial backers have now not only destroyed the **magic** of the IP, they’ve destroyed the ability of the IP to both stimulate creatively and economically. It’s such a Lose-Lose-Lose-Lose situation for everyone. Great videos! and hoping for better days for Georgia.
This video, both as a single piece of media and as an ending to your entire trilogy, filled me with both depression and exstacy of joy. Being able to emphasise with other people hating the sequels and releasing all this hate together is some real khatarsis to me. Thank you for your work. I deeply appreciate it
I would like to reiterate that they attacked advanced Star Destroyers that (apparently) had Death Star-level capabilities... with horses. Horses. Riding across the hull, no less.
@patrickhamos2987ahem hello there fellow Diver sure hope you aren't harboring any treasonous feelings towards our glorious Super Earth! May Liberty be with you!
@patrickhamos2987 Nutsa is great because she doesn't spend her whole video complaining about ThE MesSagE!! Theres a few youtubers that all they do is moan about wokey stuff and don't actually talk about why the show or movie is bad. Nutsa is breath of fresh air
I love hearing the counter argument to why daddy palps didn't stop while fighting Rey. That argument being he didn't stop while fighting mace and therefore he probably can't. I always face palm when I hear this. Palps clearly knew Anakin was coming and wanted to make it seem like he was the victim of a brutal jedi coup. The choreography of the fight is brilliant. We see Palpatine have an easy upper hand for a long portion of the battle. But when Anakin starts heading that way it shifts to Mace having the upper hand. This is very intentional. And shows just how powerful creamy sheev is. Not only could he easily dispatch of Mace but he can win by losing intentionally. Compare that to his "fight" with Rey and it's just nonsense.... like bro who are you trying to impress here??? Did he think his soul would transfer but didn't read the fine print that it doesn't work if his own attack is deflected back at him? And if that is how it worked why didn't the movie set that up???? What can you expect from a small indie studio like Disney though....
All I could think of watching this movie in the theater was how during the production of the ROTS of the PT there was people dying of cancer where it was a race against time for them to know how it all ended when they knew they wouldn't live long enough, like LITERALLY, and Lucas made arrangements for them to see the "basically finished cut" and they could literally finally die in peace, like in the real world DIED, and their families knew they died happy having got to see it... ...and how nobody could have given less of a shit this movie even existed.
Freaking amazing video, well done. I think the reason the new Star Wars movies being bad is so much more insulting than any other franchise is because it's more than just movies to a lot of people. It's a part of our culture. I remember playing with lightsabers on the tramp with my brothers as a kid, or talking about the Old Republic with my friends. Or getting together to watch Revenge of the Sith on the projector in the basement. We had decades of fun together, and Star Wars was a means of connection. Imagine if they made another groundbreaking trilogy: another decade of playing lightsabers with friends, reminiscing, and being satisfied with the greatest form of entertainment. But they offended the fans, and used (like you said) a billion dollars to create something that wouldn't benefit the overall population. And now our culture has one less thing we can love.
I still remember that at the end of The Last Jedi I was happy, not because the movie was good, but because at last they had done something original that advanced the Jedi story line somewhere and there was no way to go back...how naive I was!!
8:00 "Thank God this movie came out in 2019, cuz it would never be able to beat Chat GPT allegations now!" Somehow this made me more impressed with the amount of bs per minute this movie was able to consistently deliver
Oscar Isaac was also my favorite character. I don't like to read into an actor's performance too much, but it really did feel like he just hated being there. It sucks that Poe and Fin got handled so poorly in this series after the first movie.
My Gods. "The King of one of the most three dimension-ally performed, one dimensional characters of all time" has to be the most insightful, poetic observations I've heard. Thank you. The entire piece was brilliant, but that line was magnificent.
As a 42 year old Star Wars nerd, I tell myself that the ST movies all take place in a bizarro world alternate reality. The real galaxy far far away is free from tyrany due to the hero Luke Skywalker and his equally heroic friends. The Skywalker Saga ended in Ep. VI The Return of the Jedi. They lived happily ever after, The End.
Coverage on these movies popping up from talented people over the years and well into the future is... I guess, the happy outcome of insightful, inspiring entertainment that the movies failed to provide. There's something philosophical in that, but for now... we can just enjoy the schadenfreude. \o/
1:55 What's funny is, in any other movie if they had said the line "somehow Hitler returned", there would have been a demand for an explanation. He has been dead for over 70 years now. It would require a lot more explanation for how he could still be alive. Any filmmaker or writer worth anything, would give an explanation. The fact that they didn't think to do that for Palpatine just goes to show you how inept these people were.
i only saw TFA in the cinema when it came out, i went there with an open heart, but boy I could not believe the bad quality of this movie. It was also the last SW movie I've seen from disney since then. I knew the series was dead. And I wasn't wrong lmao. Great video, thanks!
#closeyourmouthrey
Also, I noticed, I sound a bit tired here, idk why, sorry for potential mispronunciations or garbled speech, even my vocal chords were protesting me speaking about this abomination x
Patreon (in case of interest, I would highly suggest NOT using an IOS app): patreon.com/Nutsa
🥇
Sounded good to me. Made it seem like you were exasperated. Kind of Like your favorite character Oscar Isaak.
I like your voice! it's Honey poured over a Rainbow
Nutsa you always sound tired. XD
If I had to think about TROS again, let alone watch it I too would be tired
"If you have kissed every ass in the world you're not a filmmaker, you're a toilet seat".
Shots. Fucking. Fired.
That is a great fucking line haha.
😂😂😂😂😂 I want it on a J.J. shirt with his face on it.
Skibidi Abrams
I am going to be using this line! I know way too many kool aid drinkers.
😅😅😅😅😅😅😅😅😅😅😅
It’s actually funny that these Star Wars videos are infinitely more enjoyable than the actual movies.
hey, return of the jedi was at least ok
Incredibly sad*
Always
And I think it's kind of funny and I think it's kind of sad
They're clever instead. Unlike movies.
TFA- JJ leaves a bunch of empty mystery boxes
TLJ - Rian Johnson sh!ts in all of them
TROS - JJ sets that sh!t on fire
Just...Beautiful !! LMAO !!
Sequel Fans - Get high on the flaming boxes of sh!t...
Its on fire, everything is on fire
The only correction I would make is the acronym of the last Disney Star Wars movie: "The Rise Of Palpatine" turns into the acronym TROP, not TROS.
Perfectly summarized.
"The Skywalker saga ends with all the Skywalkers dead and a Palpatine taking over."
Damn.
That's what happens when you attempt to "write a story" without having a plan, no education, no outline, no sense of dramatic structure, no desire to honor the original material(s), and so forth. Otherwise, all things being equal, competent storytelling is not all that difficult. But it DOES require discipline, consistency, planning, structure, character arcs, thematic underpinnings, etc. NONE OF THESE WERE PRESENT the more KK (and now LH) were handed the keys to the kingdom. :/ It's bloody embarrassing. It's like we gave the dogs free reign of the house after leaving for a month vacation. OBVIOUSLY, they're gonna do ya dirty, lol.
uh, that was being pointed out 4 years ago. it's why we say the name of the last movie is "The Rise of Palpatine" from Nerdrotic to Critical Drinker to Disparu to pretty much everybody else. well i'm not sure RLM is on board with it yet, those boys are still trying to run cover for Hollywood lefties and muh diversity.
.
in an age where saying that you shouldn't be allowed to call yourself a woman just because you pulled on some nylon stockings this morning gets you labeled a "transphobe", i suppose there isn't any logical reason why Rey Palpatine can't call herself a Skywalker.
@@odnamsrazor2364 Ah yes, the famously....leftist Red Letter Media. The ones who praised diverse movies like....ghostbusters 2016? Who covered for...this movie, somehow???
I legit have no clue what the rest of your statement sentence means though, I guess femboys aren't a thing anymore.
Would have been a pretty amazing downer ending plot twist if it wasn't written by real life villains who think it unironically virtuous.
Ironic
This movie is probably the most perfect application of “our expectations for you were already low but holy sh!t”
They turned Star Wars into Star Wank.
or better yet "A failure to plan is a plan for failure."
It's kind of like digging the deepest hole in the world: you can only dig downwards so far until you are digging upwards, and then you pop out in China!
Yep
I find it A Real Headscratcher (TM) that when Disney needed someone to finish this story, they got the guy who has proven repeatedly that he cannot satisfactorily finish a story.
I just always saw it as "you are the one who fcked that up, now go deal with it".
There was no coming back after two really bad movies, so who else would willingly come and attatch their name to such a failure?
I wish i could say the reason out loud why he was chosen to begin with, but i can't say that. I'll just say "they own hollywood".
@@NiveaCow the two biggest sins, IMHO, were set up in TFA then abandoned. 1) The redeemed Stormtrooper arc 2) the absolute banger chemistry between Boyega and Isaac. SUCH a crime Fynn & Po weren't a couple
It could be nobody else wanted to do it.
@@Sure0Foot honestly, and I will die on that hill: TFA just wasn't good. It was fine (if you didn't really think about it too much), but gave nothing to work with for future movies.
TFA ruined the whole thing. TLJ's failure was a natural consequence of emptiness left after TFA.
I can't believe my boy, Qui-Gon Jinn died just for the galaxy to end up like this
This hurts. That scene was one of the best.
Unpopular opinion: Qui-Gon is a terrible Jedi
@@PhelesDragonQui-Gon was a nontraditional Jedi. While the rest of the Jedi order was snifffing their own farts, Qui-Gon was straight real with it, he gambled, used mind tricks for personal gain, went against the Jedi order but overall had a more balanced understanding of the force. If Qui-Gon defeated Maul and trained Anakin, there would have been no Vader. He was the Jedi the galaxy actually needed.
@@PhelesDragon also Qui first to force ghost, he taught Yoda the technique 😉👻
@@towerrats8903 only because he was dead
I honestly forgot a planet blew up in this movie.
Honestly if the Earth blew up in the movie I’d either not notice or cheer ecstatically if it would have just ended the movie.
I also forgot, holy shit.
An entire planet wiped from existence and it has all the weight of someone squishing a mosquito with a fly swatter
I haven’t finished watching the video yet…which planet blows up in Rise Of Skywalker?
@@vietnamd0820 The one, where Poe's ex the Power Ranger lady is from.
I fell asleep in the theater which had never happened before. I don't fall asleep easily.
The "Somehow Hitler returned" is the German 2015 film "Look who's back", and it's genuinely quite a good film. Unlike anything Disney produced that year or since.
They had Inside Out that year.
@@oscarstainton like the man said
Inside Out is some boring shit
“A Jedi’s weapon deserves more respect” has the exact same energy as “This will begin to make things right” at the beginning of TFA. JJ kisses your ass while acting like he’s better than you.
Yep, basically saying at least my stuff isn't that bad compared to the other crap.
Only for his crap to be worse.
@@MegaDarkness5000the worst part about it is that instead of improving the story and continuing the story in the last Jedi.
He just being a coward and backtracked, making a what the fuck movie.
@@NoBreakz It really was a pissing contest between JJ and Ryan, both messed with each others movies. Ryan showing why JJ's Mystery boxes don't work and JJ wanting to does own thing while giving Ryan the finger.
A jedi's weapon deserves more respect, but when kylo turns to the light, he chucks his away
the last Jedi was a what the fuck movie when it came out.
It narratively acted as the end of the trilogy but in the middle.
It closed most story threads but didn't satisfy.
TFA didn't provide a great starting point but TLJ burned the house down.
ROS built a shack on the remains and it fell apart instantly.
I subscribe to the theory that Palpatine won and took over Rey's body.
Palpatine than buries the lightsabers of the skywalkers on the planet where one was a slave, another was made prisoner hidden away from his father's gaze, and one was made into a sex slave to a giant slug.
After disposing of their legacy, by literally burying it where the step brother of anakin and the aunt and uncle of Luke were murdered leaving Luke to find their charred corpses.
Ultimately, Palpatine steals the skywalker familial identity, legacy, and reputation; as they are all dead through Rey's own efforts, on her behalf, or because she was there.
So Kylo's final act was making out with Palpatine. Cool.
@@user-is7xs1mr9y remember Palpatine was anakin's "father"
"What's your name?"
"Rey."
"Rey who?"
"Rey-VENGE OF THE SITH!"
They should have just played Palpatines laugh over the very last scene of her.
As insane and stupid as that would be, it would actually leave the franchise in a far more interesting place than it is now.
You briefly point this out at around the 16m mark, but what I found astonishing about TRoS was not that it compulsively retconned everything it remembered from TLJ, but that it actually started retconning *itself* almost immediately. She killed chewbacca! No she didn't. There's only one way out of this planet, and Dameron's girlfriend sacrifices herself to save him. Oh no she didn't, she somehow returned and also took babu frik with her or whatever. They're in a pinch now, the dyed in the wool fascists are about to executen them. Umm, excuse me, Hux was the spy all along. Rey killed Ren. Sykes! She healed him. Rey died! Sykes! she was resurrected. Ren will have to face the world after everything he did. Lol, lmao, haha, he's dead. Even the snake thing doesn't stay dead.
There is not a single moment in the film where something significant happens and then just *sticks*. C3P0 gives an entire speech before being effectively killed by losing all his memories, and then *doesn't get killed*. It's legitimately a joke after a while. It obsessively retcons itself, *live*, at most a few minutes after anything happens. Consequently, literally nothing actually happens, and the consequence of that, obviously, is that nothing matters. Not only do events not have time to breath, not only do they not impact the story or the characters in any way, the events themselves only really occur by a technicality, in order to fulfil their apparent narrative purpose of being reversed immediately afterwards. it's a film that comprehensively annuls itself as it goes.
Yup, yup, yup x 100! It's like JJ wasn't certain or confident in ANY CHOICE and they kept doing the "SiKE!!! We got you!" over and over throughout the movie. You listed the examples way better than I could've! Smh... what a disaster. Shit like this makes me SURE that a group of SW fans would have made a better sequel trilogy with a smaller budget, better story telling, no retcons, NO PALP returning "sOmEhOw" etc. It's almost impressive how AWFUL some parts of the sequel trilogy were. So bad... 😭
This whole trend of "subverting expectations" in media is so lame bruh
@@OsloTimeThere currently are short fan made movies on YT that are better written on shoestring budgets than any of the ST Movies.
Sith dagger scene was the dumbest in the history of cinema. My brain bled a river of lava when she pulled out the little pointy arrow.
The existence of such an item, the way it was found, and the way it was utilized absolutely defies all logic...
It's actually like some kind of anti-logic.
My favorite meme of that scene is her holding up that knife with that little piece extended, with the caption "To the brave, anything is a sex toy". Once you see it, you can't unsee it
@@KuchiKopium😂😂😂
In the words of E;R, “think about someone had to cut up a knife to make this”
im still in disbelief years later. i cannot believe someone was paid millions of dollars to make that
its very telling that pretty much every analytical piece of content around this wretched trilogy is better than the actual movies
Yep. I will never watch this movie again. Unless it's to better understand a video about it lol
I don't understand their obsession with blowing up planets. In the original movies (the only movies), they built a battle station that had planet destroying capabilities. It wasn't designed to go around blowing up planets, the big gun was there the same as nukes are used, a show of force and deterrent. They used it on Alderan to prove they weren't empty threats. But in these movies, everything is about blowing up planets, the new Death Star is purely for that reason, the fleet of destroyers were only for that reason. It doesn't make sense to destroy planets, you get nothing from it unless using it for leverage from someone else, which they weren't. They were just going around eliminating entire planets worth of resources The writers couldn't think deeper about why they were blowing them up apart from baddies are bad.
There's also the fact that blowing up planets isn't an effective narrative device by its own. Destroying a village where the viewers know the people of has more of an impact than destroying a planet the viewer don't know. Alderan's destruction relied on Leia's reaction to have an impact and it also set up the treat of the Death Star blowing up the rebel base like that later. Remove those two elements and Alderan's destruction would not have mattered.
also add to the fact that if a rebellion gets the hand on one of those destroyer they will be able to blow other destroyers. Controlling and maintaining hundred of destroyers is much harder than keeping a massive fortress afloat.
eventually bunch of criminal could also take a destroyer and boom, everyone's dead.
Planet busting obsession in the shitlogy is simply one of the obvious marks of cheap intellects.
They took something that had great shock value in the originals, the station that can pop planets, and already has once. And they're like : everyone this is so cool ! And our characters are cooler than the originals ! So they blow more planets, they're better in the blowing planets game ! Coolnesss !
Fan fiction level stories brought to cinema with a billion dollar budget...
When 40k is more reasonable you know things took a turn...
@@Crystalgate Exactly. They just didn't understand what the weapon represented and the uses of it. That what I was saying, what was the point in blowing up anything? It didn't teach anyone a lesson, it wasn't for extortion, it wasn't even some lunatic rage thing where someone snapped and is hunting one person and is willing to take an entire planet to do it, it wasn't to make the audience feel the weight of the decision. There is no weight or stakes, you saw a handful get taken out and felt nothing because it was just something that was happening.
It is not lazy writing, it is people that never learned to write.
The Death of Stalin mentioned and acknowledged as a far superior film. That genuinely made me happy.
To be fair, most films are superior to this one.
I LOVE that movie so much! I need some The Death of Stalin merch to wear. Maybe a tee-shirt with Jason Isaac's character taking off his coat when he's first introduced, that was awesome lmao. When the son comes in and tells them to stop even though they've already opened his head and you can see his skull was so freaking hilarious. One of my favorite movies I've ever seen! 😂 Also, when they grab the poor doctor and they just leave his dog there... 😂 😢
It is a good day when one of my favorite dark comedies is praised
I wish the team behind that would do the voyage of the Baltic Fleet.
@@OsloTimeZhukov of a brash Yorkshireman was hilarious.
I'm grateful for the Rise of Skywalker being so terrible that it united a fandom badly divided after TLJ to agreeing, yes, the sequels were a disaster.
@@JohnSmith-tw6po I'd suggest that The Acolyte, KK's pet project since 2020, was far more effective in uniting an already weary Star Wars fan base. Despite all the evangelizing by Hollywood press, it was both the least viewed and most expensive Star Wars show ever made. I just can't see how Disney renews KK's contract in October 2024.
r/StarWars still thinks the sequels were good
@@RedCrusader-ph2vk Redditors have no taste. That's not surprising.
@@ToeCutter0even if her contract isn't renewed, where does Disney SW go from here?
@Valen-mh9fh I genuinely don't know. If I'm being completely honest, I no longer have hope for Star Wars. The Disney brand is in deep decline. Iger came back to fix Disney in 2022, but they're doing even worse than when he returned.
We'll have to wait for Favreau's Mando film in 2026 to see which direction Iger wants Star Wars to go, but I'mnot holding my breath. It's no accident it's the only Star Wars film in development and slated to release before Iger's contract is up in 2026.
15:11 "why didn't he just stop?"
It's funny you mention that because at one point as Rey is deflecting the lightning, he actually drops his arms to his sides.
When he does that he actually stops shooting lightning, and yet, somehow, more lightning is just firing off her two lightsabers.
Just shooting off the lightsabers. Spontaneously flying off them and hitting good old Palps.
I'm not even joking. It's so bad.
And that's after they establish she can use force lightning! (Chewbacca) wow! Just wow. Screw these films lol
Well, he drops his arms at that point because his death successfully transferred his spirit to Rey and he was just making sure to get rid of any question of if he was dead this time so he could go live his life as his grand daughter.
Palpatine finally mastered the ability to move his spirit (how he lived in clones and was also Snoke) and he just needed to die to take a new form: the body of his granddaughter. Strike him down and he will become more powerful, and she killed him. Why? Because she heard voices in her head. We saw at the beginning of the movie that Palpatine can do that and be every voice in someone's head. What voices does she hear? A bunch of Jedi that Palpatine knew. The voices in her head were Palpatine. He won. Only a matter of time before he burns her out and takes over completely.
When I was a wee lad, we used to play with our action figures in the backyard. We were able to come up with more exciting and cohesive stories with tons of action without even trying…. That’s cause all of us understood we were just kids and we didn’t care if one person suddenly brings in boba fett even though we’re fighting on Endor. Hey that’s cool. But JJ and Rian are two adults in the same backyard and each is throwing their action figures at real kids and saying, YOU WILL LIKE THIS ! YOUR SNOKE THEROY SUCKS KID! Lol
How did Palpatine return? Why on earth did Kylo Ren and Rey kiss? How did Rey gain the ability to Heal wounds? Why would Rey call herself a Skywalker? How was Palpatine's star destroyer fleet built? Why is Finn force sensitive? How did Lando's friends/recruits make it to Exicle?
J.J. Abrams: I don't care.
Let's take the questions in order.
He used the force ability "force getting better".
Because Twilight fans, under the name of Reylos, demanded it.
Well, in the video game "Super Star Wars: Return of The Jedi" Luke does have the heal ability. I guess that's cannon now, maybe along with Dart Wader turning into a scorpion from a NES game.
How else would the title of the movie be justified? Granted, it wasn't justified anyway.
Palpatine pulled it out of his ass with "force ass pull".
A lot of RUclipsrs posted interesting sounding ideas of Finn being force sensitive, so JJ just ran with it, but omitted the detail about actually doing something interesting with it.
A new technology was invented that allows travel at the speed of plot.
I gave up trying to understand the sequels after the reveal that Hux was a spy for the Resistance. The man we saw cause the scorching of his supposed side's OWN EARTH.
The answer to all of your questions is "the force"
Trust me bro
Don't forget that you had to play Fortnite during a limited-time event to actually HEAR the message that Palpatine sent to the entire galaxy announcing his return...
The Rise of Skywalker - the result of a man who makes a mess of things attempting to clean up another man's mess.
He attempted to clean up not just another man's mess, but his own as well.
JJ Abrams made a mess .... relied on RJ to clean it up.... RJ lit the mess on fire .... idiot JJ Abrams was left to stick the landing. woof.
The man who started the mess in the first place with The Force Awakens
I'd say TFA built an unstable structure which Rian could have stabilized (not to mention he didn't have to kill Snoke or even resolve Rey's mystery box). Rian then went "no one would expect me to kick the structure down!!". Then Abrams had to deal with that mess.
Luke could have been on that island looking for some kind of ancient force technique/artifact. He could have had students whose training he was finishing then time jump to avoid Rey being ESB Luke. Snoke didn't need explained. Rey's parentage could have been handwaved by herself "they were early resistance fighters who left me on Jakku for a dangerous mission and I was just in denial". Maz says in TFA that Rey already knows her parents are never coming back so implied dead is fine.
TLJ's biggest issue was not doing a fucking time jump.
I remember when my family was going to see TROS. It was the first time ever going to a theater where I genuinely felt depressed before even seeing the movie. That’s how much TLJ destroyed me and still somehow TROS made me more depressed than I ever thought possible.
Personally tros managed to get into that so bad its good sphere. At that point I would have been disappointed if it had been good.
Yeah, same, me and my brother, and mom were going, brother and I were already joking about how bad it was going to be, it really was a lot worse then are already low expectations.
Still trying to figure out they they thought it was a good idea to make half the new films use the exact same letters in their names as the older films even though they knew perfectly well that fans used acronyms to deal with the long film titles.
A new Nutsa video 14s ago? Click!
Kylo Ren as "the most three-dimensionally acted one-dimensional character" was superb, and sad - so glad to see Driver still working actively, great talent
Your way of describing the flaws of this movie really is fantastic. Your comedic timing is pure gold.
i dont agree with you. the last jedi feels like it hates us, so it at least makes me feel something. it makes me feel emotions. with rise of skywalker i felt: "oh leia died? whatever. palpatine somehow returned? how yeah sure what else... rey skywalker? sure buddy..." i just felt apathy....
the baby yoda animations keep getting better and better!
I find it crazy they spent all that money and seemingly didn't hire a professional writer
That's because professional writing takes time. You've got your first draft, then revisions, then revisions of your revisions, then editing, followed by more revisions, followed by more editing, and then- if you're lucky- you have a final draft that gets torn to pieces at the filming set requiring more revisions. Then, as you're nearing wrap up of production the studio sends in a bunch of notes requiring more revisions. Such a tedious cost to keep that writer on board for the whole thing.
On the other hand, you could just pay the director to write the script and let them do whatever so long as you hit your release date after having to do last minute shoots to attempt and fail at addressing test screening concerns.
because its not about the writing being good, its about Disney-executives pushing their agenda & selling merch. Just look into what happened to the script for "Wish"
The person I feel the most sorry for is Ian McDiarmid, I can only imagine his reaction when Jar Jar Abrams approached him about coming back to Star Wars
I do and I don't feel sorry. Like, I feel sorry that the character he worked so hard to craft over three decades is now just some puppet husk that JJ is throwing up on screen because _REASONS_ ... But I don't feel sorry because he could've at least said no. But if the money is just TOO good, that's fine, go get paid, it's all good. But then at that point, that's a business transaction... it's like saying "I feel sorry that that person sold his spare car". There's nothing to feel sorry about when it comes to a purely business transaction.
@@nickfifteen you can't blame him entirely because you are right, Disney did give him a lot of money for him to return, same for Harrison Ford, so he was just collecting a pay check and going home
"I'm thinking about bringing the emperor back - could we count on you Ian?"
I died, how could I return??
"Somehow"
Don't insult Jar Jar Binks like that!
Man's gotta eat, he got paid.
Han Solo wasn't force sensitive, so that wasn't his force ghost, even in the movie Kylo says that it's a memory. So Kylo Ren forgave himself for killing Han in the imaginary conversation with him.
8:05 "It would never been able to beat ChatGPT allegations" so this motivated me to ask ChatGPT to write a sequel to episode 7 and 8 and here we are :
*Title: Star Wars: Episode IX - The Shadow of the Force*
*Opening Crawl:* The galaxy teeters on the brink of chaos. The First Order, under the rule of Supreme Leader Kylo Ren, tightens its grip on countless star systems. The Resistance, though severely weakened, continues to ignite sparks of rebellion across the galaxy.
Rey, the last hope of the Jedi, seeks to uncover the mysteries of the Force, following the guidance of the ancient texts. Meanwhile, Finn, haunted by his past as a stormtrooper, begins to sense a growing unrest within the ranks of the First Order’s soldiers.
As an ancient darkness awakens, the final battle between light and dark is about to begin...
*Act 1: The Gathering Storm*
*Rey’s Quest:* Rey, now more attuned to the Force but still struggling with her inner turmoil, discovers a hidden message within the ancient Jedi texts. The message speaks of a dark force, the Eternal Shadow, that predates both the Jedi and the Sith. This entity, known as the Revenant, feeds on the conflict between light and dark, growing stronger as the galaxy descends into war. Rey sets out to find the source of this darkness, believing that it holds the key to ending the conflict.
*Kylo Ren’s Rise:* Kylo Ren, now fully embracing his role as Supreme Leader, is haunted by visions of a great darkness threatening to consume him. Determined to solidify his rule and eliminate any threats, he begins to seek out ancient Sith relics, hoping to control this dark power before it controls him. However, he is increasingly isolated, even from his most loyal followers, as the darkness within him grows.
*Finn’s Discovery:* Finn, who has become a key leader within the Resistance, begins to hear rumors of stormtroopers who, like him, have broken free of their conditioning. As he investigates, he discovers a growing underground movement within the First Order’s ranks-stormtroopers who are secretly defecting, refusing to fight for a cause they no longer believe in. Finn is determined to help these defectors and bring them into the Resistance, believing that they could be the key to turning the tide of the war.
*The Resistance’s Last Stand:* The Resistance, under the leadership of Poe Dameron, is on the run, constantly moving to evade the First Order’s forces. They receive word of a secret alliance of independent systems that are willing to stand against the First Order but are wary of committing fully to the Resistance. Poe and Finn set out to rally these allies, hoping to turn the tide of the war, while Finn simultaneously works to reach out to the stormtrooper defectors.
*Act 2: The Awakening of the Revenant*
*Rey and Kylo’s Dual Search:* Both Rey and Kylo Ren’s quests lead them to a forgotten world, deep in the Unknown Regions, where the dark side is unnaturally strong. They discover that the Revenant is an ancient being that was once a powerful Force user, neither Jedi nor Sith, who was consumed by the Force itself. This entity seeks to engulf the galaxy in eternal darkness, feeding on the conflict between light and dark to achieve its goal.
*The Revelation:* Rey learns that the Revenant is linked to both her and Kylo Ren-through their powerful bond in the Force, they have unknowingly been awakening this dark power. The Revenant reveals that it sees them as its perfect vessels, capable of uniting the galaxy under its rule or destroying it entirely.
*The Conflict Within:* As Rey confronts the Revenant’s influence, she is tempted by the power it offers-the ability to end all suffering by imposing her will on the galaxy. Kylo Ren, meanwhile, begins to question his path, realizing that his quest for power has only made him a pawn of this ancient darkness. Their bond intensifies, as they each struggle with their own inner demons and the possibility that they are destined to either save or destroy the galaxy together.
*Finn’s Awakening:* As Finn continues to connect with other stormtrooper defectors, he discovers that many of them are Force-sensitive, their latent abilities perhaps linked to their ability to break free of the First Order’s conditioning. This revelation deepens Finn’s sense of purpose, as he realizes that he, too, may have a stronger connection to the Force than he ever knew. He begins to train these defectors, helping them harness their newfound abilities while preparing them for the battles ahead.
*Act 3: The Final Confrontation*
*The Resistance’s Assault:* The Resistance, having gained the support of the independent systems and with Finn’s stormtrooper defectors by their side, launches a desperate assault on the First Order’s command center. This time, they are not alone-the stormtrooper defectors turn on their former comrades, leading to a chaotic and intense battle. Poe leads the starfighter attack while Finn leads the ground assault, using his knowledge of First Order tactics to outmaneuver their forces.
*Rey and Kylo’s Showdown:* Rey and Kylo Ren confront each other at the heart of the Revenant’s power. The Revenant attempts to possess them both, forcing them into a battle of wills. During their duel, they both experience visions of the galaxy’s future-one of endless darkness under the Revenant’s rule, and one of fragile peace achieved through balance.
*The Sacrifice:* Realizing that their bond is the key to either the galaxy’s salvation or destruction, Rey and Kylo Ren agree to work together to destroy the Revenant. In a moment of clarity, Kylo Ren embraces his true identity as Ben Solo, choosing to sacrifice himself to weaken the Revenant’s hold on the galaxy. This act of redemption allows Rey to channel the full power of the light side, banishing the Revenant and restoring balance to the Force.
*Finn’s Victory:* On the battlefield, Finn leads the stormtrooper defectors in a final push that overwhelms the First Order’s remaining forces. His leadership and courage inspire the defectors to fight with renewed determination, and they succeed in capturing the First Order’s command center, effectively ending the war.
*Epilogue:*
Rey, now at peace with her identity and purpose, returns to the site of the ancient Jedi temple. She begins training a new generation of Force users, including the former stormtroopers who have discovered their own connection to the Force. These new guardians of the Force are not bound by the old Jedi or Sith traditions but instead seek to maintain the balance that has been restored.
Finn, having found his true calling as a leader and teacher, helps guide these new Force users, understanding that his journey from stormtrooper to hero was only the beginning. The final scene shows Rey and Finn, standing together under the twin suns of a distant world, ready to pass on the knowledge they have gained to ensure that the balance is maintained for generations to come.
Damn that's _way_ better than the real thing. I'm not sure that Finn would be able to train force-sensitive people, maybe Rey and him working in concert, but that's an easy fix.
Woaaaaaah. On the one hand, it's hilarious how similar it is to the movie when you look at the structure and the basic plot points. It's also funny how many storylines it tries to cram in, giving every main character their own plotline. You usually have an A and B plot, but this chatbot seems to think more is better by giving C and D plots as well.
It would be better if Rey succumbed to the Dark Side in her quest for peace, and Kylo emerged as the Hero as Ben Solo.
I kinda love that opening crawl lol
The Conflict Within is pretty good, too! Lol this is hilarious.
Your three and a half minute summary at the end deserves a standing ovation 👏. In fact I think you should release it as it's own video
Somehow, Skywalker never rose.
The old adage from my middle school days seems fitting here: If you fail to plan you're planning to fail.
I cant believe videos about this movie are coming out 5 years later and i love every one of them
Your part at the end really captured why it matters so well
The most hilarious part in this movie is that the Palpatine's message mentioned in the opening text was done in FORTNITE.
"Somehow, Palpatine returned."
Is still the worst sentence ever spoken in the history of cinema.
Nope. "I am your father," because it set this whole soap-opera shitshow up in the first place. Star wars was fresh and full of untapped potential to expand in amazing directions, and George Lucas had to turn it into All My Children in space.
Just found this channel/series a few days ago. The first two videos were fantastic, can’t wait to watch this one!
I saw this movie once...hats off to you for seeing it a 2nd time
I watched it twice, it was not in the theaters though, and I did it because the first time, I had the impression that the movie's story was actually about nothing at all, it was almost as if it was an unrelated new space opera film, completely unrelated to anything. From time to time, I rewatch specific scenes of the other two movies, to fantasize they belong to a different version of the trilogy (they're just a very few scenes), this one I never feel like rewatching nothing of it.
@@luisrods right? I sometimes watch the scene that introduces Kylo Ren in episode VII and think "this could have been cool" and then I switch off bc the rest is garbage
@@Reorganiser indeed, the first movie has good isolated scenes. That one is good, just as you noted. Another one that is very good is when Fin and Poe steals the TIE Fighter to escape. In The Last Jedi, there's probably one one for me, when Kylo kills Snooke, behaving like a Jedi; I imagine he redeems right after and Rey falls to the dark side. Those hypothetical movies sometimes play in my head.
So in short you rewatch to fantasize what couldve been in better story telling
@@tillerzeit Ha, ha, ha, ha, just specific scenes (sometimes here in YT), never the whole movies. I think the characters, on paper, were not a bad idea, just awfully written.
That brief glimpse at younger Leia really struck me. I thought it looked bad in theatres. Seeing it five years on, she looks like she's a Raya and the Last Dragon character. The EYES.
The echoing "Reyyyyy...!" in the background 😆
It's so embarrassing how this trilogy was handled. Even as early as TFA, it felt less like a cohesive vision someone had to tell and story and more of reactionary response to how people viewed the viewed the franchise. "People thought the Prequels were too much of a departure from the OT, well TFA will literally be just the OT. Wait, people think TFA is too much like the OT, well TLJ will be totally different. Wait, people jow think that TLJ strayed too far from the point of the series, well..." and so on and so forth. ROS is pretty much the culmination of Disney/Lucasfilm's constant scrambling to makes things work because when you don't plan out your story, you get the conflicting narratives of TFA and TLJ and you get characters who are either inconsistent or just straight up wastes of space.
It gets worse than that, JJ Abrams took full advantage of the fact that he wasn't supposed to write part 8 and 9. His film was written by the motto "make it easy for me at the expense of future writers". He planted empty mystery boxes that said future writers would have to fill or fail to fill, made promises and set expectations that they also would have to fulfill and even had Rey prematurely defeat Kylo Ren and thus make it even harder to use him as an effective villain, all that while leaving future writers very little to work with. He also made a "A New Hope" mark II and the other writers would not have been able to get away with making a "Empire Strikes Back" mark II as a common opinion was "we liked the movie, but please make a more original story next movie, okay". This is not something you do if you have a vision.
Palpy was just back to troll everyone for the lulz. That's all he ever really wanted.
8:01 Skibidi Abrams can’t hurt you
Skibidi Abrams:
I love Nutas’s acumen and low-key sasss❤
Aye Nutsa is queen!
I heard her yesterday and I was like WTF is this. But I listened for a while and it kind of grows on you.
Force Lightning must be like urinating. You can't just 'turn it off' mid-stream.
In 2019, I went into this movie as a Star Wars fan and I left completely apathetic to Star Wars. I can’t even bring myself to watch the old movies anymore.
See I knew all these would be shit, I managed to finish Rogue One and thought that was bad enough, I gave up on the rest. Never watched any of them. So as far as I'm concerned there are six films, and I'm not sure about three of those.
I find it so disheartening specifically because Lucas’ six films (and the to show) always had artistic integrity. He was always more concerned with telling his story right than with making a safe and marketable product. I find it amazing that there are still those who bash him. The funny thing is, the sequels are exactly the mindless, loud movies that have nothing beneath them, that critics accused Lucas films to be. 😅
That's not really true. Wisecracking battle droids, Jar Jar, child Anakin, huge exploding space ships being safely piloted to crash landings though from space by a single pilot in a cockpit. All that silly crap was added just to make it more exciting for kids, no matter how silly it annoying it was. He just managed to preserve a tolerable story during all of it. But he definitely wanted to make it safe and marketable.
TLJ burned me so much that I barely remember it and any potential desire to see this one evaporated. I literally did not care hearing about this movie, beyond thinking it really should have been "The Return of Palpatine" instead.
The most amazing thing is that ABSOLUTELY NOT A SINGLE DROP OF CGI WAS spared.... It's amazing how much they lied about not using cgi and people gobbled that slop up.
Always reminds me of that Top Gear episode where have they Aaron Paul come in to promote his new chase film (sorry, I mean to drive the Reasonably Priced Car), and they happen to discuss his new film, and he goes on to say "yeah, and it's all practical effects, no CGI at all, whenever you see something happen, we really did that, we really wrecked Ferraris and a hundred cars, it was amazing". He says "we have a clip here" and they show this action packed sequence with cars doing like 200mph, rolling over in slow motion, flying through the air, helicopters exploding, etc, obviously mostly fake. And Clarkson is just like "so no CGI at all, really? That's amazing." And Paul is like "yup", but you can see inside he's just thinking "why the fuck did they tell me to say that? Why did I agree to this!?" Amusingly embarrassing.
Don't forget that the entirety of the 3 movies take place during *1 week*
I noticed the Time was compressed
I think canonically there’s a gap of around a year between TLJ and TRoS. TFA to TLJ is basically a couple hours though.
@@a_fine_edition2746it's hard to tell from within the movies. Pretty much everyone is the same as they were in the first movie.
There's also an odd lack of scale. Despite being a galaxy, it feels so small.
@@a_fine_edition2746 Not even a couple hours. TLJ starts exactly where TFA ends, with Rey & Luke on Achto, just with a quick twist from uniting key characters with a powerful, emotional tone, into a whimsical, tired, cranky tone.
@@Valen-mh9fh It's not that the galaxy feels small, but just that it is inconsistent and unexplained. At least in OT we got the idea that Tatooine, Alderaan, Yavin, Hoth, Cloud City, Endor (etc) had some distance between them. PT shows us fairly large distances between Naboo, Coruscant, Tatooine, Kamino, Geonosis, Utapau, Mustafar.
But the ST just shows lasers destroying planets, weird sub-light speed travel battles (all of TLJ), light speed skipping (and First Order ships following them on these light speed skipping jumps) & ships basically arriving wherever they need to be, including 1000's of ships being able to navigate a treacherous path to Exegol.
Honestly, I just love your editing style with the baby yoda drawings :) Thanks for your enjoyable content
Obviously she won't see this (likely) but
NUTSA!!
I'm so glad I found your channel!
Your mind is so beautiful thank you for this!! ❤❤😭
It never rose is a reference to rose being cut from the story
F-ing GREAT! You are hilarious!
You have a million subscriber product!
Truly.
J.J. on Rian: HE'S A TRAITOR!!!
Rian on J.J.: *HE* IS THE TRAITOR!!!
I had never heard of this channel, and I avoided watching this film like the plague but you, madam, are hilarious.
Funny....original......mature......well written.
your trilogy of reviews.....not the wretched films.
Thanks. Really enjoyable.
You said it best: this movie is a set of "cool scenes!" put together to fill a checkbox of what all people in the audience are expecting and produce engagement bait marketing, not a story.
BABE WAKE UP, NEW NUTSA STAR WARS VID.
I haven't even given this another thought since a little after seeing it and now hearing you tearing it apart, is hurting all over again. 😭
You shouldn't have stopped putting that Oscar Isaac image every somehow, I was cracking up.
1:16 Oh my God I never noticed that! That's so lazy! Thank you for pointing this out.
This shit is getting out of hand bro, we need to stop it
"Nothing built by weaklings lasts."
I love how savage this is. Subscribed
you’re absolutely right-it is criminal that these vast sums of money are tossed around so recklessly, by people who wouldn’t recognize a creative thought if it slowly chewed off all their limbs. Lucas took a chance back in the 70s- the $9 million he raised to create star wars a new hope went on to become a billions dollars IP. And aside from all the joy created and imaginations stimulated, let’s look pragmatically at all the jobs that were created over those decades. Kennedy and her cronies and financial backers have now not only destroyed the **magic** of the IP, they’ve destroyed the ability of the IP to both stimulate creatively and economically. It’s such a Lose-Lose-Lose-Lose situation for everyone. Great videos! and hoping for better days for Georgia.
This video, both as a single piece of media and as an ending to your entire trilogy, filled me with both depression and exstacy of joy. Being able to emphasise with other people hating the sequels and releasing all this hate together is some real khatarsis to me. Thank you for your work. I deeply appreciate it
Hell yea, I just finished watching the first two parts yesterday, I love your content so far 🎉
I would like to reiterate that they attacked advanced Star Destroyers that (apparently) had Death Star-level capabilities... with horses.
Horses. Riding across the hull, no less.
This review/rant, rivals the Critical Drinkers review from 5 years, so that's really good and impressive. Keep up the hard work
@patrickhamos2987ahem hello there fellow Diver sure hope you aren't harboring any treasonous feelings towards our glorious Super Earth! May Liberty be with you!
@patrickhamos2987 Nutsa is great because she doesn't spend her whole video complaining about ThE MesSagE!! Theres a few youtubers that all they do is moan about wokey stuff and don't actually talk about why the show or movie is bad. Nutsa is breath of fresh air
Never forget that Palpy CANONICALLY returned in a Fortnite event for all this to happen.
I love hearing the counter argument to why daddy palps didn't stop while fighting Rey. That argument being he didn't stop while fighting mace and therefore he probably can't. I always face palm when I hear this. Palps clearly knew Anakin was coming and wanted to make it seem like he was the victim of a brutal jedi coup. The choreography of the fight is brilliant. We see Palpatine have an easy upper hand for a long portion of the battle. But when Anakin starts heading that way it shifts to Mace having the upper hand. This is very intentional. And shows just how powerful creamy sheev is. Not only could he easily dispatch of Mace but he can win by losing intentionally. Compare that to his "fight" with Rey and it's just nonsense.... like bro who are you trying to impress here??? Did he think his soul would transfer but didn't read the fine print that it doesn't work if his own attack is deflected back at him? And if that is how it worked why didn't the movie set that up???? What can you expect from a small indie studio like Disney though....
All I could think of watching this movie in the theater was how during the production of the ROTS of the PT there was people dying of cancer where it was a race against time for them to know how it all ended when they knew they wouldn't live long enough, like LITERALLY, and Lucas made arrangements for them to see the "basically finished cut" and they could literally finally die in peace, like in the real world DIED, and their families knew they died happy having got to see it...
...and how nobody could have given less of a shit this movie even existed.
Suddenly, Rebel Moon makes a lot more sense.
love your analysis. good sense of humor too
You know it's bad when the best part of the movie is Palpatine saying "Dewit" again.
Had your previous video in my recommendations, really enjoy these. LOVING THOSE LIL ANIMATIONS
Freaking amazing video, well done. I think the reason the new Star Wars movies being bad is so much more insulting than any other franchise is because it's more than just movies to a lot of people. It's a part of our culture. I remember playing with lightsabers on the tramp with my brothers as a kid, or talking about the Old Republic with my friends. Or getting together to watch Revenge of the Sith on the projector in the basement. We had decades of fun together, and Star Wars was a means of connection. Imagine if they made another groundbreaking trilogy: another decade of playing lightsabers with friends, reminiscing, and being satisfied with the greatest form of entertainment. But they offended the fans, and used (like you said) a billion dollars to create something that wouldn't benefit the overall population. And now our culture has one less thing we can love.
I still remember that at the end of The Last Jedi I was happy, not because the movie was good, but because at last they had done something original that advanced the Jedi story line somewhere and there was no way to go back...how naive I was!!
8:00 "Thank God this movie came out in 2019, cuz it would never be able to beat Chat GPT allegations now!"
Somehow this made me more impressed with the amount of bs per minute this movie was able to consistently deliver
You are hilarious! Love the videos.
Somehow... Nutsa returned.
Also, I have never watched this film; The Last Jedi represented the last dollar Star Wars will ever see from me.
Once you get over your initial anger and rage as a Lucas SW fan, you'll find it's quite soporific and has some use 😅
27:48 as yoda would say: with great power comes great responsibility
thanks kathy lmao
I had never seen that clip until this video. I think it summarises her tenure as President of LucasFilm😂😂
Thanks JJ and KK
20:54 😂 I was laughing with you at the end of this. Prime humor 👍
Oscar Isaac was also my favorite character. I don't like to read into an actor's performance too much, but it really did feel like he just hated being there. It sucks that Poe and Fin got handled so poorly in this series after the first movie.
My Gods. "The King of one of the most three dimension-ally performed, one dimensional characters of all time" has to be the most insightful, poetic observations I've heard. Thank you. The entire piece was brilliant, but that line was magnificent.
As a 42 year old Star Wars nerd, I tell myself that the ST movies all take place in a bizarro world alternate reality. The real galaxy far far away is free from tyrany due to the hero Luke Skywalker and his equally heroic friends. The Skywalker Saga ended in Ep. VI The Return of the Jedi. They lived happily ever after, The End.
Nutsa.... Your work is beyond excellence 🥇
You know, I hadn't thought about it, but you're right about how AI-written it sounds. If it had come out later, no one would believe it hadn't been.
You said what the kriff... Awesome..
You could take the full TRoS film and easily stretch out the movie to a full three part trilogy. Because the movie has 50 story arcs
Worst of all, they are all extremely inconsequential
Coverage on these movies popping up from talented people over the years and well into the future is... I guess, the happy outcome of insightful, inspiring entertainment that the movies failed to provide.
There's something philosophical in that, but for now... we can just enjoy the schadenfreude. \o/
13:20 Sheev was on Exegol catching up on his anime backlog while his empire crumbled. Makes as much sense as anything else.
1:55 What's funny is, in any other movie if they had said the line "somehow Hitler returned", there would have been a demand for an explanation. He has been dead for over 70 years now. It would require a lot more explanation for how he could still be alive. Any filmmaker or writer worth anything, would give an explanation. The fact that they didn't think to do that for Palpatine just goes to show you how inept these people were.
6:04 Well said, by the way!
i only saw TFA in the cinema when it came out, i went there with an open heart, but boy I could not believe the bad quality of this movie. It was also the last SW movie I've seen from disney since then. I knew the series was dead. And I wasn't wrong lmao. Great video, thanks!