You are too afraid of everything. Just let go and do all the things you want to don't think about it, I use to be the same and not going to lie I am still making changes but what I realized is that you just have to let go don't worry about what might and might not happen, don't even think just do it. The more you think the more afraid you become and you start making excuses. Don't rely on motivation, do it even when you don't feel like it. Making changes is difficult I know this from experience, I had to hit rock bottom to finally wake up, the truth is you cannot change with thought alone, you need to act it out only then you can believe that you can do it, only then you can become the person you want to be not with thought but with action.
@how8955 Nothing is certain in life you have to take a gamble. If you want to move forward you have to risk failing too but this does not mean you have to give up.
@how8955 are you telling me if you fail once, you will give up? Look even if you don't make it the fact that you tried your best will be better than nothing.
Same here, 21 years old as well. I dont know if it's just fate or if its my fault. And my friends, both male and female of same age range (old people don't count and you know why), always comment every once in a while that they are surprised that I've never had romantic experience because I look relatively attractive. At times it gives me confidence, at times I feel like theyre just lying to make me feel better. I started getting into fashion and even male makeups to polish my appearance just to have a chance. But no amount of effort got me anywhere. People say I'm just picky, but really, it's just so hard to find someone that deep down is on the same wavelength as I am. I think you're right, I too am afraid of reaching out. Growing up, I've encountered many couples in friends and relatives becoming so toxic over time. And unsurprisingly, they are the kind of people that are 'popular'. It's not fair to call people like us picky when we just wanna find someone that we can see ourselves in a long term relationship with.
ayyyy man you got this bro! Look on the brightside, with your height the gym will be that much easier for you to see progress and you will be jacked in no time! This will also circle back around and make you look taller since you are bigger!
I feel like you’re the male version of me! I’m 21 too and never had a bf and turning 22 this year. I went to an all-girls school for 7 years until 18 and I don’t have any guy friends. As embarrassing as it sounds, I genuinely don’t know how to talk to guys. In fact, I graduated University this year and left having never made a single guy friend in my entire time there. Confidence is also an issue of mine, I struggle with it a lot (I’m 5’0 and often get called “little girl”) Another thing, I always fantasise about having a boyfriend and what being in a relationship feels like but like you, I also don’t like change. Hate it actually. I was in a similar situation where I ended up ghosting a guy that was interested in me mainly because he was always texting me and I struggled to find the words to reply to him. Sucks honestly but yeah I definitely need change, to put myself out there more, actually socialise with guys, get my drivers license, move out… omg the list goes on.
OMG, it's actually crazy how similar your story is to mine!, but yeah, i do believe that regardless of the outcome, working in ourselves is the right thing to do, even though just starting is already overwhelming 💀
@@lezui yeah absolutely but I'm sure you’ll do amazing as you keep working on yourself, besides, you’re honestly a really attractive guy so don’t let those doubts hold you back 👍🏻 good luck and pls keep us updated!
Where are u from? Most guys struggle to talk to girls so it’s not your fault. I have never a long term gf and I am pretty decent looking so you’re fine you will find someone.
Ill soon be 24 and I never had a gf. Never approached girls in my life. Honestly idk how to approach a girl and what to say to her. I don't feel like I'm attractive enough for them
I'm almost in my 30s and life is still the same when it comes to dating, I feel like there's not a Women out there that genuinely likes me or would want to be with me because I have a good heart and I am just misunderstood a lot.
bro u dont need to lower your expectations just be the better man and she will gave no choice but to choose you. you're not ugly in fact u got 9.5/10 potential go to gym, bulk up, hit compound movements, fully grow ur beard use minoxidil, once you look good and create discpline in the gym youll feel more confident inside. After you're going to have to approach the girls you are attracted to at some point and that takes skill like everything in life but keep trying dont give up you got this if you got trouble taking action try going to the gym for 20 minutes, every 2-3 days its about showing up, creating discipline you don't have to go insane mode to start take small steps every week until u get a good routine
Lezui, change now change today be more outgoing go to local events, don't decide they aren't for you I decided to just go, I signed up on Tinder, and having positive contact with a woman I never had to cold approach her, and we are going to go out soon when she lets me know she has some time as I agreed upon with her after offering to do it tomorrow I'm not sure if she will be free, but hoping for the best. I was exactly like you, except I wasn't making excuses, I was doing other things to distract myself since it felt easier, but at the cost of my own mental health I haven't felt better since last week when I decided I'm just going to go, and talk to people and make changes. It is not entirely your fault, but does it matter if it is your fault if your actions still cause you to be miserable? No, you have to change either way.
bro there is the oppertunity to go abroad, girls are mostly nicer, better looking and super welcoming. And what I like the most about it is that you get to start over. Not meaning that you should pretend to be someone you are not, but a fresh breath of air can be amazing and life-changing. Just an option. Good luck, youll figure it out!!
I’m 30 and I’ve have a few girlfriends tbh but at your age I didn’t have any girlfriends too. I just think it takes time to develop yourself. Don’t stress out about it too much and I love Dandadan too😊
Man you gotta remember..you are 21 not 41. Achieve everything you can while you are in 20s 30s ..Enjoy play achieve sleep eat good and repeat.A person will come along eventually. If not then also its okay to eat pastry on first class❤❤❤
Title is quite literally me, same age and status.. But well to be fair, I've been through so much thinking about it in my life and I've started working too now, I've realized a thing that whenever I got into this chain of thought about my situation and reality I'd fall in a rut and for about a week or 15 days I'd be super demotivated to do anything or even think about anything productive.. Just wasted time sulking over my pathetic self while in all honesty no one is born with a security that we'll have a full of relationship/love childhood/teenage or even life.. There are people who have also died without ever kissing anyone or having someone they can call as their partner, never been in a relationship in their lifetime.. But does that mean that their life was just a failure or full of misery? No not really.. And that's where the silver lining is.. Life is formless, it's form and flavor totally depends on what we fill in it, our *perspective*, things that we value or care about.. Yes most of us do care about having a good love life but sometimes it's just not meant to happen I guess.. And that's exactly why I just try my best to not think about it anymore, live my single life for as long as it would be, cuz there's a ton of things we can still enjoy and be grateful for, always.. Life is a miracle and if you think about it, even a second of experiencing it would be worth it..
Be careful what you wish for dude. You get short moments of pleasure/fun in exchange for hours of emotional and psychological torture a lot of the time when you are with a woman. Don’t believe the hype that having a woman is the ultimate state of being or happiness,
If youre looking for fun or pleasure in a woman then yes. But I would say also don't think that most people can feel happy without a meaningful romantic relationship. Humans are a big family based community so its a goal for most people to start a family.
If you're gonna go with the prettyboy hair you gotta SHAVE and have clean skin bro. You're actually a pretty good looking dude, put in some effort into your appearance and you'll be good
I’ve had several girlfriends. Just got rid of my longest relationship. Don’t even bother. Most relationships are lies and or involves one or the other cheating or monkey branching. Trust me you’re better off single
It sounds like you need God more than women right now. If you don't want it bad enough you wont get it. You must do the things you don't want to do to become the person you want to become, not even God can save you from your monumental laziness. If you go to the gym consistently for 6 months at least 5 days per week, eat healthy unprocessed foods, read the Bible daily, work on a skill that can bring you more income, and you don't feel confident about yourself then something went seriously wrong along the way. Trust in God, he has someone special for you just keeping rowing and God will steer you. No need to rush the process, trust it. Don't start going to them gym "soon", start NOW, you must stay consistent brother. There is no such thing as motivation, only discipline which is built by doing the things you DONT want to do. You must BECOME the person that lives your "dreams". DONT LET YOUR DREAMS GO TO THE GRAVEYARD WITH YOU, GOD GIVES YOU THOSE DREAMS FOR A REASON CHASE THEM BROTHER. Proverbs 18:1
You need to level yourself up. Back in college highschool I had the same mind set. When I started going to the gym and working on myself, woman started noticing. And I got my first girlfriend after college 😀
You are too afraid of everything. Just let go and do all the things you want to don't think about it, I use to be the same and not going to lie I am still making changes but what I realized is that you just have to let go don't worry about what might and might not happen, don't even think just do it. The more you think the more afraid you become and you start making excuses. Don't rely on motivation, do it even when you don't feel like it. Making changes is difficult I know this from experience, I had to hit rock bottom to finally wake up, the truth is you cannot change with thought alone, you need to act it out only then you can believe that you can do it, only then you can become the person you want to be not with thought but with action.
johan based
Oh you ate that for real
Until it goes wrong then what
@how8955 Nothing is certain in life you have to take a gamble. If you want to move forward you have to risk failing too but this does not mean you have to give up.
@how8955 are you telling me if you fail once, you will give up? Look even if you don't make it the fact that you tried your best will be better than nothing.
27 here , losing hope and it’s making me hate myself because I know it’s my fault that I’m not good enough. It’s my fault. I don’t deserve it either
Do u even ask girls out??
Stop focusing on things you can't control. Focus on what you can control.
Same here, 21 years old as well. I dont know if it's just fate or if its my fault. And my friends, both male and female of same age range (old people don't count and you know why), always comment every once in a while that they are surprised that I've never had romantic experience because I look relatively attractive. At times it gives me confidence, at times I feel like theyre just lying to make me feel better. I started getting into fashion and even male makeups to polish my appearance just to have a chance. But no amount of effort got me anywhere. People say I'm just picky, but really, it's just so hard to find someone that deep down is on the same wavelength as I am. I think you're right, I too am afraid of reaching out. Growing up, I've encountered many couples in friends and relatives becoming so toxic over time. And unsurprisingly, they are the kind of people that are 'popular'. It's not fair to call people like us picky when we just wanna find someone that we can see ourselves in a long term relationship with.
ayyyy man you got this bro! Look on the brightside, with your height the gym will be that much easier for you to see progress and you will be jacked in no time! This will also circle back around and make you look taller since you are bigger!
I feel like you’re the male version of me! I’m 21 too and never had a bf and turning 22 this year. I went to an all-girls school for 7 years until 18 and I don’t have any guy friends. As embarrassing as it sounds, I genuinely don’t know how to talk to guys. In fact, I graduated University this year and left having never made a single guy friend in my entire time there. Confidence is also an issue of mine, I struggle with it a lot (I’m 5’0 and often get called “little girl”) Another thing, I always fantasise about having a boyfriend and what being in a relationship feels like but like you, I also don’t like change. Hate it actually. I was in a similar situation where I ended up ghosting a guy that was interested in me mainly because he was always texting me and I struggled to find the words to reply to him. Sucks honestly but yeah I definitely need change, to put myself out there more, actually socialise with guys, get my drivers license, move out… omg the list goes on.
OMG, it's actually crazy how similar your story is to mine!, but yeah, i do believe that regardless of the outcome, working in ourselves is the right thing to do, even though just starting is already overwhelming 💀
@@lezui yeah absolutely but I'm sure you’ll do amazing as you keep working on yourself, besides, you’re honestly a really attractive guy so don’t let those doubts hold you back 👍🏻 good luck and pls keep us updated!
Damn you sound like my type fr 😂
Where are u from? Most guys struggle to talk to girls so it’s not your fault. I have never a long term gf and I am pretty decent looking so you’re fine you will find someone.
Ill soon be 24 and I never had a gf. Never approached girls in my life. Honestly idk how to approach a girl and what to say to her. I don't feel like I'm attractive enough for them
I'm almost in my 30s and life is still the same when it comes to dating, I feel like there's not a Women out there that genuinely likes me or would want to be with me because I have a good heart and I am just misunderstood a lot.
never had a gf til 25, its normal, dont worry about it too much
That's not normal
that's abnormal
@@CallofDuty927 Sounds like a you problem.
@@VVabsa sounds like you got triggered cuz u found urself innit
@@CallofDuty927 Now you are projecting.
bro u dont need to lower your expectations just be the better man and she will gave no choice but to choose you. you're not ugly in fact u got 9.5/10 potential go to gym, bulk up, hit compound movements, fully grow ur beard use minoxidil, once you look good and create discpline in the gym youll feel more confident inside. After you're going to have to approach the girls you are attracted to at some point and that takes skill like everything in life but keep trying dont give up you got this if you got trouble taking action try going to the gym for 20 minutes, every 2-3 days its about showing up, creating discipline you don't have to go insane mode to start take small steps every week until u get a good routine
Body, personality, money, car, sense of humor…everything! Being 5’3” takes away the option of sitting back!
Lezui, change now change today be more outgoing go to local events, don't decide they aren't for you I decided to just go, I signed up on Tinder, and having positive contact with a woman I never had to cold approach her, and we are going to go out soon when she lets me know she has some time as I agreed upon with her after offering to do it tomorrow I'm not sure if she will be free, but hoping for the best.
I was exactly like you, except I wasn't making excuses, I was doing other things to distract myself since it felt easier, but at the cost of my own mental health I haven't felt better since last week when I decided I'm just going to go, and talk to people and make changes.
It is not entirely your fault, but does it matter if it is your fault if your actions still cause you to be miserable? No, you have to change either way.
Honestly seeing this and feeling a bit validated, like yeah, it´s not just me, I´m glad there´s people commenting about their own experiences
bro there is the oppertunity to go abroad, girls are mostly nicer, better looking and super welcoming. And what I like the most about it is that you get to start over. Not meaning that you should pretend to be someone you are not, but a fresh breath of air can be amazing and life-changing. Just an option. Good luck, youll figure it out!!
Aboard?
Dude, you're authentic!
I’m 30 and I’ve have a few girlfriends tbh but at your age I didn’t have any girlfriends too. I just think it takes time to develop yourself. Don’t stress out about it too much and I love Dandadan too😊
Man you gotta remember..you are 21 not 41.
Achieve everything you can while you are in 20s 30s ..Enjoy play achieve sleep eat good and repeat.A person will come along eventually. If not then also its okay to eat pastry on first class❤❤❤
You just like me fr fr.
I'm 33 and I've never had a girlfriend
Cap?
@@dark_nightwing_xl2797 no sir
I don't think I got high standards but I ain't selling myself for Gorlock the destroyer that's for sure.
im 31 and never had a gf in my life.. i never asked a girl out, but its because im ugly so i would just get rejected if i tried
Myself 22, never had
Man i'm literally you. 21 yo and never has a girlfriend before, sometimes i think that maybe I'm aromantic but idk yet, never tried it before
"i dont look good" you look majestic but ok whatever
Title is quite literally me, same age and status.. But well to be fair, I've been through so much thinking about it in my life and I've started working too now, I've realized a thing that whenever I got into this chain of thought about my situation and reality I'd fall in a rut and for about a week or 15 days I'd be super demotivated to do anything or even think about anything productive.. Just wasted time sulking over my pathetic self while in all honesty no one is born with a security that we'll have a full of relationship/love childhood/teenage or even life.. There are people who have also died without ever kissing anyone or having someone they can call as their partner, never been in a relationship in their lifetime.. But does that mean that their life was just a failure or full of misery? No not really.. And that's where the silver lining is.. Life is formless, it's form and flavor totally depends on what we fill in it, our *perspective*, things that we value or care about.. Yes most of us do care about having a good love life but sometimes it's just not meant to happen I guess..
And that's exactly why I just try my best to not think about it anymore, live my single life for as long as it would be, cuz there's a ton of things we can still enjoy and be grateful for, always.. Life is a miracle and if you think about it, even a second of experiencing it would be worth it..
I’m 21 and never had a boyfriend
Really?
Be careful what you wish for dude. You get short moments of pleasure/fun in exchange for hours of emotional and psychological torture a lot of the time when you are with a woman.
Don’t believe the hype that having a woman is the ultimate state of being or happiness,
If youre looking for fun or pleasure in a woman then yes. But I would say also don't think that most people can feel happy without a meaningful romantic relationship. Humans are a big family based community so its a goal for most people to start a family.
bro if you don't have a gf i have no chance
I have never had a long term girlfriend and I am 26.
You look good, how tall are u?
5'3" he said
@@M.TTT. BROOOOOOOOOOOOOTAL
It's over
@@M.TTT. its joever
that's the reason unfortunately
Dude at 5’3” you are gonna have to light up the room and be rich! Just sayin…
I feel sad for you brother i know what that feels i am 35 now thou i am happy 😂😂
If you're gonna go with the prettyboy hair you gotta SHAVE and have clean skin bro. You're actually a pretty good looking dude, put in some effort into your appearance and you'll be good
I turned 23 and never been in a relationship. It's just okay I guess 😅
@@Sarcastic-Insann As long as you're happy with your life, I don't think being single is a problem tbh
69 subs! it's a sign.
I’ve had several girlfriends. Just got rid of my longest relationship. Don’t even bother. Most relationships are lies and or involves one or the other cheating or monkey branching. Trust me you’re better off single
Rookie numbers bro
I am 27YO. Same here. xD
It sounds like you need God more than women right now. If you don't want it bad enough you wont get it. You must do the things you don't want to do to become the person you want to become, not even God can save you from your monumental laziness. If you go to the gym consistently for 6 months at least 5 days per week, eat healthy unprocessed foods, read the Bible daily, work on a skill that can bring you more income, and you don't feel confident about yourself then something went seriously wrong along the way. Trust in God, he has someone special for you just keeping rowing and God will steer you. No need to rush the process, trust it. Don't start going to them gym "soon", start NOW, you must stay consistent brother. There is no such thing as motivation, only discipline which is built by doing the things you DONT want to do. You must BECOME the person that lives your "dreams". DONT LET YOUR DREAMS GO TO THE GRAVEYARD WITH YOU, GOD GIVES YOU THOSE DREAMS FOR A REASON CHASE THEM BROTHER.
Proverbs 18:1
Uh huh
this
true.
You need to level yourself up. Back in college highschool I had the same mind set. When I started going to the gym and working on myself, woman started noticing. And I got my first girlfriend after college 😀
Where did u meet her if u mind me asking?
@@ixmar9994 Gym! 😀
@ she approached you?
You have a weird feminine energy but are not ugly at all, change the style and lift some iron you will be fine. 🤷♂
@@advancedmonkey7702 it's probably the hair 💀, but yeah I think you're right, building up some muscle is a must ☝️
@@lezui Workout, it's literally the best thing about being short, you will look muscular in no time.
u look , sound and act gay maybe that's why
@@youngboynevaintagain3653 thanks for the kind words brother 🙏