Dr. Jen, I got married at 40 and got pregnant (naturally) a few months later. Our kiddo is in kindergarten now and is absolutely beautiful, happy and healthy. You WILL get everything you want out of this life. God’s timing is always perfect and the right man is worth waiting for!
I am 39 and people in miserable marriages are always the ones looking at me like I’m disabled because I’m still single, not to mention abstinent for 5 years. All my friends are already divorced with kids in their 30’s. Do I want a family? Yes! I pray everyday for that. But I am selective and willing to wait for who God has for me, I don’t want to ruin my life just to fit in and show I have a ring on my finger.
Good decision, especially the deliberate attempt to be faithful to your body and God; even as you wait for God. He is a faithful God. He is never late.
I married late in life...48 to be exact! GOD'S TIME is not like our time...your soul mate already exist you Just haven't met him yet...in due season you will!❤️🔥Amen🙏🏽
Dr. Jen, thank you so much for being transparent about this topic. I am also over 40 and never married. It is not an easy journey but I believe God is always on time. I pray that God blesses you with your kingdom husband at the appointed time in Jesus name. Abundant Blessings!
Thank you Dr Jen for opening up,what you said about people being on different paths in this journey of life is so true.I am 40years,still single ,I'm at peace and contant with myself,I also believe that marriage will happen for me when the time comes
I'm married to a doctor. One thing I loved about my wife while we dated was our conversations. She's one of the few people whom after I talked to felt that she was brighter than me (well for most things). After 20+ years of marriage we now have 3 super smart kids with my xxl sized physique (I'm polynesian). Keep at it! Love is great once you find it 💙 Arohanui.
Dr. Jen, honestly you are a roll model to me. As far as the doctor in his forties that made that comment. He and all of the other men out there either need to up their academic game or check their ego!!! You are badass for what you have achieved academically. That should NOT be a reason you can't find love.
You wanna leave the casino when you're up not on the decline. This is what happens when women listen to feminism lies. You forgo the very thing that gives women meaning (being a wife and mother) for degrees and education and merit that make you act masculine and piss away your youth. She needs to be educating younger women on why the DO need a man and marriage instead of sleeping around during your 20's and then wanting to be taken seriously when your 44 after you're on the decline
Thank you 🙏🏽 for sharing this because there’s so many of us out here in the same situation. I felt ashamed and felt something is wrong with me but it took me some time to realize that it’s ok and we are all different and do things at different times in our lives.
So your comments section makes me realize, its quite normal. Im really glad you shared your story about proposal and refusal. Not because someone chooses you it does not mean you HAVE TO, choosr them. Thank you❤
I love that she spoke on a prior engagement. A lot of women that aren’t married didn’t settle & I hate when people validate themselves with a ring when they are actually invalidated from marrying for reasons outside of themselves…..
It was a great moment of vulnerability. Absolutely nothing to be ashamed. You're an amazingly perfect person in His eyes. Just who God made you to be. You will have your heart's desire.
@@DrJenCaudle just making a statement of truth. I love the fact that you're not settling. Love always finds a way to show itself at the appointed time.
This is so timely, I'm 44 years old, once and broke it off 5 years ago. I have also felt anxiety, fear of being alone. I cant settle with a guy that doesnt want to get married, etc. This gives me hope that we will all find our match on our own timeline. Thanks for sharing this!
This is the problem right here. The lies. You don't have time. You SHOULD feel pressured because your running out of time. Men aren't some disposable thing you can just pick off a tree when you're on the decline.
I’m 34 years old I have never been married or engaged. I’m a health science major looking into becoming a nurse 👩🏾⚕️. I just haven’t met the right one. And I don’t have any kids
What I like about this video is how relatable it is. It is helping me make peace with other areas of my life (I’m happily married) but it helps me make peace with other parts of my life I need to work on. I have to learn to be content and wait on God to do things
I am 41, in a partnership. I still haven’t met the right one. I think marriage isn’t for me or at this time. I’ve struggled with this embarrassment. Im glad I’m not alone.
We aren't intimidated, we just aren't attracted to the things women find attractive in a man and women have yet to figure this out. The ones who do are married.
I’m 42, never married (or engaged) and have been single for almost 9 year (dated twice to see what’s out there - oh, and it was terrible) I just can’t seem to “find” someone I’m genuinely interested in.
Thanks for uploading this. I'm not saying people should avoid relationships/marriage but already know a lot of relationships/marriages ending now in my 30's or even sadder, people's partners/spouses ended up dying. It's not the end of the world!
Staying single is better theres less stress and worries. I'm 43yrs old never married and no children I feel alot of freedom. Even my money I can spend it wisely. I will rather win lost souls for the Lord Jesus Christ 🙏
Its hard when am loveless and jobless, no boyfriend since birth at 48. The guy who ghosted me whose now married and just my next door neighbor. He used 2 b a bum, now successful with his career. Now, he takes pride and backfight me... Telling people I got poor hygiene while he never really courted me formally, just on and off. Now, ive ben stuck feeling the for 5yrs now... Now, ive been bashed by his relatives, bullied me, doing anything in order to disturb my peace... I dnt know whats d revenge for??? I talked to him in 2019. I thought it was clear to him but until now, people around him like close friends bully me.......???????
Dang Doc... had no clue you were over 40....Im 45 and unmarried, still trying to figure out why we are still harassing and shaming women about marriage...I just wish people would let us just be..and stop trying to make something wrong with it..I want marriage to happen organically and now out of necessity...
Because you're past your fertility window which is basically a womens value on the sexual marketplace. MEN VALUE= Youth, beauty, fertility. WOMEN VALUE= Strength, Experience, long term Security. Both genders looks for opposites. The truth is a women over 40 and unmarried is a loser just like a man who cant provide or lead. We have to start telling younger women the truth instead of being selfish and lying to ourselves.
I mean there aren't a lot of men out here Ready to marry especially FINANCIALLY. they seem to be ready when majority of us are past our prime and the eggs have turned into powder.
People often criticize me for saying that I never got married because I never wanted to get married. Have I been asked yes, they were not the right guy for me.
There’s nothing wrong with being single, there are some people who are in their 30s, 40s, 50s, 60s and are still single. We have a season, when it’s God’s timing to bless us a partner. Single is a gift, it’s not permanent so use the time to focus and concentrate on yourself.
If you were in thirties , I would definitely take you. But you really worked hard to get there . I am not here to shame you. That is your choice . I like hard working females . Be blessed !
Don't mean any harm, but I think it's critical to think about all of this during undergrad while being deliberate in dating. In many cases, women headed to graduate or professional schools are extremely focused on academics (I agree, it's necessary) and ignore any suitors during that time. Also, if the guy doesn't fit the description in terms of height, looks, etc. during that time, it's worse (I've seen it). Hopefully, the younger generation is much more deliberate and earlier in life for a fighting chance on getting the results they desire before middle age kicks in.
Man, i saw her post and she has concluded that her fear of failure in her career is the reason that she is unmarried and without children. I think that she needs to dig deeper. See, I hear an example of poor values. Her value system suggests that money, a career, and semblance of success (MONEY) is more important than what God loves. See with women like this God and spirituality comes last when it should have been first.
Dr Jen Caudle please move on with your single life. Singleness is a great option too. Stop talking about marriage and Singleness move on with your life. You didn't make any mistake by choosing not to get married. Be happy with your life and move on.
Wow, Mister Kevin Samuels addressed all this so well. They way modern women make horrible decisions and then many blame GOD for their problem, when GOD gives us freedom of will. We make good choices and it is our fault. We make bad choices and it is our fault. Freezing eggs and talking about someone else's marriage being miserable. Kevin Samuels videos are like gold to this. Notice the one woman in white HAS A WEDDING RING ON.
Getting married is your choice. I’m 36 male . Haven’t found the one as yet . But because I’m a workaholic and working under pressure I don’t have much Time to find a date . I spend my late nights at work. It’s a horrible feeling in the morning , my testosterone levels goes high . I’m planning to see a doctor to reduce my testosterone levels. Sometimes I illegally take estrogen to reduce my testosterone levels . It’s horrible when you get in the morning with a high libido. I prefer to be single as I’m used to living an independent life . I sometimes go to restaurants and movies alone . I prefer having low libido.
It’s difficult. But estrogen seems to be working. I just need to reduce my stress level. I like being independent but it doesn’t not paint a good picture for society as you look like the odd one out with no family of your own.
Well, leave it to me to talk about the elephant in the room and the FACT there are NOT enough qualified REAL men who want to be married and start a family, let alone, had fathers in the home to model healthy love & affection and what it takes to be a high value man, provider and protector of women & family. High value men “typically” desire women age 22-25 for bearing children and typically do not care about women’s income or educational goals/potential. She’s beautiful, educated, fit, and has all the qualities of wife material, but not enough mentally & emotionally HEALTHY high value men available to the number of women in her category. Wishing her and all women w/the same issues & concerns the very best in finding life long love & happiness.
I hope Black Americans look into matchmakers while young... if they are busy with school and work then please delegate seeking a spouse. to a matchmaker .. and get feedback and advice form a matchmaker... form early on. Maybe some Black Americans can pick this up as a profession and develop it and make a better system for Black Americans...
I am single mother of one my prayer to get married to European men I am from Africa in Kenya all my life of in working in Arabian country like a Slave my wish one day to get married to someone will love me and conditioner I don't want to get married to in my country Kenya I wish to get married to European men I am Chabi black from Africa please help me to find the right man age 40 and above
It's called hypergamy my darling and/or the proverbial and vaunted "check list". Your pool of suitors is virtually nonexistent. Good luck on your quest.
@@RAJOHN-ke7mc yes please ignore medical professionals that deem everything over age 35 as high risk pregnancy and plummeting egg counts. Yes please ignore medical facts.
THE PROBLEM WE WOMEN HAVE IS NOT WHETHER OR NOT WE WILL FIND A MAN BUT ITS IN CASE WE WANT TO HAVE BABIES… YOU CAN MEET THE RIGHT PERSON EVEN IN YOUR 80,s BUT WHAT ABOUT PARENTHOOD?…
Somehow I can't tolerate my single life anymore and I am finding hard to keep my sanity in days moving by. deep down I had no issue with it but now getting to 40 and I see gene Z all married and having kids I feel like sth hasn't been alright with my life. Maybe high standards faith and falling a bit into grey black purple zone of LGBTQ😂 I really dunno😅 the stigma of staying single with zero bodycount😂 I just can't happen to be able to explain to anyone even new people who shoot messages on dating apps. My look is at least 10 to 15 yrs younger than my age I lived as healthy life style I could do but still have some health issues I need to work on. Maybe youtube is the only place I could get some advice. Even psychiatry specialists don't understand me. I just have not seen any interesting guy, neither in society with I am interacting nor dating apps. Those few like 50 sth people that I liked in a decade, but they never responded. I don't know how to live my life past 40 it may sound funny, but it feels like I am out of time to do many things I like to do.I have no clue how to be normal again
Feel like this doctor jen maybe just waiting on god i don't believe in my heart you running away from lovme looking Mr right too fine you maybe feel like will have too sacrifice your career for your relationship what I don't understand is why is a woman career more important than they marriage maybe doctor Jen feel like you'd not value but you are it's a lot of young guys out here will date a woman like you beautiful inside and out
@@DrJenCaudle What have you done to actively attract a man? I'm not talking about your education or money because honestly most men don't want any of that.
@@DrJenCaudlesee so many women getting deceived by the motto "strong independent black woman". And the sad thing is is that motto has been a double edged sword for many black women. Because it has made the black woman look masculine and not feminine. This has started to push most men away from black women irregardless of how a black woman might think that motto applies to them. I have seen many black female victims crying saying they wish they weren't grouped under said motto. But unfortunately because the motto has been used so much by black women many black women who are not the said motto type gets thrown in the pile. I have two sisters (who are black) who have been "waiting on God to give them a husband". But yet I see them constantly turn down the men God sent their way and go after the low life men. I am going on a large assumption but you talk maybe as if you believe in God. And if you do then you have got to try a different approach. If you want a man make sure he is a righteous man first. Why? Your first mistake is waiting on God... Faith is an action you don't sit down on faith that's why faith without works is dead. So what are the works you need to do? 1. Allow Christ to completely change who you are. You must do the exact things repent of all your sins, be water baptized in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ (many pastors don't preach this), next you must be filled and seal with the holy spirit in your heart (many preachers don't teach this way either but have your pastor "tarry" with you until you are filled in your "heart". You will know when you bear the fruits and signs of the holy spirit. This right here is a huge part of a Godly and blessed marriage. Never ever ever get married until you and your suitor meet this requirement. 2. Next don't date as people in the world date but have a holy courtship that is administered by your pastor, parents and his parents. 3. Be willing to be obedient to God and the leadership of your husband. God gave men and women one specific job each. Women are to be a help mate and men are to rule over women. [Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee. Genesis 3:16 KJV And the Lord God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him. Genesis 2:18 KJV ] 4. Let me clarify number 3 the woman is to be a blessing and help to the man and honor him and the only way this can truly be done is if she has applied step 1 to her life. The man can only lead or rule over the woman not as a "dictator" but a husband if and only if he has applied step number 1 to his life. Because how is the man supposed to lead his wife? In love. Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; Ephesians 5:25 KJV 5. Last but not least both of you are you be obedient to God and don't waver. You can't do any of this on your own nor can your suitor because if you want a blessed marriage it must if be ordained by God (step 1), lead with love, and kept with obedience. It's sad that ministers don't teach this to their congregation. I have seen proof that this does work. And I am living proof when done wrong.
Please stop talking about being 40 and never been married that is completely meaningless. What is the meaning of been 40 and never been married it's meaningless. Marriage is not a must and Singleness is a beautiful option too. Please stop this topic of been 40 and never married it is meaningless.
@@c.f.okonta8815 Kevin Samuel is gone..alone whatever karma he put out for women, he will reap. He left alone with no loved ones on his side. For the rest of us it’s best to put positive energy out there especially towards women so we don’t end up like him. He was in debt living in a rented room in a woman’s home and had not paid her. He has no relationships and was with a random female when this happened. Not surrounded by his children or the love of his life. Those are the real lessons we should learn from this man. His ending showed his reality.
It is not normal to be in our 40s to have never married nor have kids. Something is wrong with women who have neither and in their 40s. Stop coddling women with this BS!
NGL I admit I do feel some degree of shame having been without a partner for over 10 yrs. I am generally quite comfortable being on my own if not for the social pressure, really. But once there are PEOPLE involved in knowing about my single status….that’s when shame sets in. If it is not my marital status that I am embarrassed about, then it would be my age. No win either way. At work, I don’t mind sharing that I am unmarried, but very secretive about my age, or relationship status (I happen to look much younger than my real age and use that to my advantage to mask my shame). And then in my personal life, I am ashamed to reveal my unmarried status to old school mates, distant relatives or people who do know my age, but whom I haven’t seen for a while. It’s only with close friends who are in similar situations as me, whom I don’t mind sharing my age and single status. But I do feel the shame may be limiting me from getting out there and meeting new people as I happen to keep a safe distance owing to this shame. At best I just make acquaintances and nothing more. Dating apps never did it for me, as I was forced to reveal my age on such sites, and immediately lose confidence that people of my age group would not pick me (had only dudes 20 yrs older writing back). Sigh, I wish I could banish the shame. I mean if LGBTQIAs can be out and proud, I don’t know why it’s tough for a straight single to be just as out and Proud too.🤷🏻♀️
Rubbish. Singleness is a great option as well. If you have chosen to be single enjoying it but don't come here to be discussing marriage that you ignored. Please let married people to be discussing marriage. You don't have the experience to be talking marriage it's not your thing. Move on with your single life.
Folks want it all, and they just can't have it all. A lot of American women, in particular specific group, does not prioritize marriage as much as they prioritize their career
No, a lot of American men, in a particular group, does not prioritize marriage or fatherhood. That's more accurate...you think? The proof is in plain sight.
By the time you get to 40 you have lost what most high value men want, Samuels God rest his soul said it to his death. I wish she had called him and talked to the God Father before his death.
That's true. The only thing I would add is that instead of looking for a “high-value nan,” look for a man who is decent, hard-working and law-abiding, period. High-value men are more than likely unattainable to most women anyway, especially if you have not prepared yourself to be a high-value woman, in terms of being an educated, cultured, well-spoken, disciplined woman and all the other things the godfather talked about.
PART 1: CONSIDER COURTSHIP Greetings Sis. Caudle, As you expressed your position as to why you have decided to patiently wait for your soulmate, a divine process of marriage came to mind and I felt the need to ask you a question. Have you ever heard of the age-old yet successful marital strategy and process called Courtship? It’s not dating, rather it is more like a process of determining compatibility by getting to know someone via questions and answers coupled with chaperoned visitation with family or close friends. Courtship puts the natural attraction of both individuals in check as there is little to no physical contact to interfere with the process of asking and answering questions to determine compatibility. It supersedes dating in that, both parties come to the conclusion that if they are not compatible, there is no harm, no foul, and no physical factor to consider. They just go their separate ways wishing the other well. Most beneficial about Courtship is, both parties MUST BE interested in getting married to even begin the courtship process. Also, that the two are willing to commit to the process of courtship if they are both in agreement that if they are compatible, marriage is on the horizon. Contrary to the 21st Century Dating Scene, I find that courtship narrows that field from those who are leisurely dating to those who are seriously interested in marriage. I pray that this information is of value on your divine path towards completion. I pray that you are blessed with the utmost success in your quest in finding the mate of your soul.
@@misssterling3094 it’s pathetic comparing over 40 unmarried men to over 40 unmarried women. Men can naturally have kids in their 70s. Can women do the same?
![Felix "Unfair" | [Stray Kids : SKZ-PLAYER]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/Oswujxm2Ag0/mqdefault.jpg)
Dr. Jen, I got married at 40 and got pregnant (naturally) a few months later. Our kiddo is in kindergarten now and is absolutely beautiful, happy and healthy. You WILL get everything you want out of this life. God’s timing is always perfect and the right man is worth waiting for!
That is AMAZING! How inspiring! Thank you!
Lol. Exceptions prove the rule
I am 39 and people in miserable marriages are always the ones looking at me like I’m disabled because I’m still single, not to mention abstinent for 5 years.
All my friends are already divorced with kids in their 30’s.
Do I want a family? Yes! I pray everyday for that. But I am selective and willing to wait for who God has for me, I don’t want to ruin my life just to fit in and show I have a ring on my finger.
Hang in there! Love your dedication!
Freeze your eggs 🥚 so that you and your future husband can have kids you’re already 39
Same 38 here. Never married & no kids
Good decision, especially the deliberate attempt to be faithful to your body and God; even as you wait for God. He is a faithful God. He is never late.
I love you sis
I married late in life...48 to be exact! GOD'S TIME is not like our time...your soul mate already exist you Just haven't met him yet...in due season you will!❤️🔥Amen🙏🏽
i love this!
Thank you so much for this 🥹💕
Amen!💫🔥🙏🏽⚘️
Amen
God's time might be zero time 😂 ...u need to just make things happen, if u don't wanna come home to 12 cats.
Dr. Jen, thank you so much for being transparent about this topic. I am also over 40 and never married. It is not an easy journey but I believe God is always on time. I pray that God blesses you with your kingdom husband at the appointed time in Jesus name. Abundant Blessings!
Thank you so much - and I feel the same way!!
U gotta make things happen yourself if u want it.
God has nothing to do with your choices. God let's people make bad choices. God punishes people who squander their blessings
Thank you Dr Jen for opening up,what you said about people being on different paths in this journey of life is so true.I am 40years,still single ,I'm at peace and contant with myself,I also believe that marriage will happen for me when the time comes
After you reincarnate the time will come
I'm married to a doctor. One thing I loved about my wife while we dated was our conversations. She's one of the few people whom after I talked to felt that she was brighter than me (well for most things). After 20+ years of marriage we now have 3 super smart kids with my xxl sized physique (I'm polynesian). Keep at it! Love is great once you find it 💙 Arohanui.
Wow thank you so much- what a kind and inspiring message ❤️
I'm glad you mentioned that you're Polynesian.
Culture, community, upbringing matters.
I wouldn't marry a man doctor...all of the nurses, bosses, and patients are trying to take him. One day he'll give in.
Dr. Jen, honestly you are a roll model to me. As far as the doctor in his forties that made that comment. He and all of the other men out there either need to up their academic game or check their ego!!! You are badass for what you have achieved academically. That should NOT be a reason you can't find love.
Aww thanks so much!
He's a doctor also, though. Why does he need to "up his academic game"? Why would a person being intimidated imply egocentricism?
public pressure is real..its so hard for people to mind their own business..constantly being asked questions can be overwhelming
It’s so true!
Very true!...
You wanna leave the casino when you're up not on the decline. This is what happens when women listen to feminism lies. You forgo the very thing that gives women meaning (being a wife and mother) for degrees and education and merit that make you act masculine and piss away your youth. She needs to be educating younger women on why the DO need a man and marriage instead of sleeping around during your 20's and then wanting to be taken seriously when your 44 after you're on the decline
Nobody is meant for marriage or having a family!but people want to ask why you are not married and not having kids...😢so sad....
Thank you 🙏🏽 for sharing this because there’s so many of us out here in the same situation. I felt ashamed and felt something is wrong with me but it took me some time to realize that it’s ok and we are all different and do things at different times in our lives.
Nothing is wrong with you! Hang in there! You’re JUST FINE!!!
So your comments section makes me realize, its quite normal. Im really glad you shared your story about proposal and refusal. Not because someone chooses you it does not mean you HAVE TO, choosr them. Thank you❤
So so so true!!! Yes!!!! And you’re not alone!
I love that she spoke on a prior engagement. A lot of women that aren’t married didn’t settle & I hate when people validate themselves with a ring when they are actually invalidated from marrying for reasons outside of themselves…..
Maybe no one else settled for unmarried people
It was a great moment of vulnerability. Absolutely nothing to be ashamed. You're an amazingly perfect person in His eyes. Just who God made you to be. You will have your heart's desire.
Aww thank you so much! 🙏🏾
@@DrJenCaudle just making a statement of truth. I love the fact that you're not settling. Love always finds a way to show itself at the appointed time.
BEAUTIFUL VIDEO ❤❤
just shared with my 30 year old daughter, you are a breath of fresh air ❤❤❤
Wow, thank you!
@DrJenCaudle you are most welcome doc.
never lower your standards for anyone. Any man feeling intimidated is not a good suiter
True. And thanks
And not settling will keep you single
Thanks for this, I needed it.
aww thanks
This is so timely, I'm 44 years old, once and broke it off 5 years ago. I have also felt anxiety, fear of being alone. I cant settle with a guy that doesnt want to get married, etc. This gives me hope that we will all find our match on our own timeline. Thanks for sharing this!
No never feel that way... there is nothing wrong with you and don't beat yourself up
✅
You propose then
@@DrJenCaudle Oh my.... don't know how much I want to.....lol..... ❤️
@Dr. Jen Caudle love you ❤❤❤
@@DrJenCaudle you are such a special person to me ❤
I agree. Sometimes there is no reason that some women are single. They just haven't met the one yet! No need to analyze further.
True
Everything happens for a reason
Exactly I mind my business and I like being in my house 🏠
Thank you for the video. Believe it or not I'm in my late 20s and been feeling a bit of pressure on myself lately as well.
It’s ok- you’ve got time. And you’ve got this!
This is the problem right here. The lies. You don't have time. You SHOULD feel pressured because your running out of time. Men aren't some disposable thing you can just pick off a tree when you're on the decline.
@@housetatum9484 No, the problem is so many of you MEN being so noncommittal and NOT valuing family.
Marrying late than marrying wrong
Yes
Amen!
My cousin is getting married at 56
@@alerobabes01God bless them🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽 congratulations 🎊🍾🎈
@@alerobabes01 Damn that's so late.
I’m 34 years old I have never been married or engaged. I’m a health science major looking into becoming a nurse 👩🏾⚕️. I just haven’t met the right one. And I don’t have any kids
What I like about this video is how relatable it is. It is helping me make peace with other areas of my life (I’m happily married) but it helps me make peace with other parts of my life I need to work on. I have to learn to be content and wait on God to do things
You got this!! And thank you so much!
In due season, God will send the right man for you Dr Jen & for everyone else reading this. I love that Dr Jen is such a humble soul
Dr. Jen is such a sweet soul!!! I love you!!!
Aww thank you
I am 41, in a partnership. I still haven’t met the right one. I think marriage isn’t for me or at this time. I’ve struggled with this embarrassment. Im glad I’m not alone.
Don’t be embarrassed- it’s all good!
What about motherhood? If you cannot take donated eggs for religiously reasons and you want to be a mother and started to be worried after 40?
Hi
Our life is irreversible. You rather enjoy it now than regret later. We are complete with our partner and children.
So true and thanks for the advice!
We can be complete without a partner and child. Many women never get to be a woman in life many have passed on not experiencing it
Who cares if some men are intimidated, because the woman is SUCCESSFUL? A real man with self esteem wouldn't be intimidated.
🤷🏾♀️
We aren't intimidated, we just aren't attracted to the things women find attractive in a man and women have yet to figure this out. The ones who do are married.
I’m 42, never married (or engaged) and have been single for almost 9 year (dated twice to see what’s out there - oh, and it was terrible) I just can’t seem to “find” someone I’m genuinely interested in.
To someone worthy of your love angel Dr Jen
Thanks
Thanks for uploading this. I'm not saying people should avoid relationships/marriage but already know a lot of relationships/marriages ending now in my 30's or even sadder, people's partners/spouses ended up dying. It's not the end of the world!
Staying single is better theres less stress and worries. I'm 43yrs old never married and no children I feel alot of freedom. Even my money I can spend it wisely. I will rather win lost souls for the Lord Jesus Christ 🙏
I'll be your huckleberry 😁 I won't even come out till you say ....hey you come here 😂😂
Huh?
@Dr. Jen Caudle huckleberry( husband) won't bother you till you say....hey you come here meaning ill act right 🤣 just a lil humor
Thank you 😊
You’re welcome!
Stop listening to society tell you what you need to be happy. It’s BS. Being with the wrong person can take years off your life.
Its hard when am loveless and jobless, no boyfriend since birth at 48. The guy who ghosted me whose now married and just my next door neighbor. He used 2 b a bum, now successful with his career. Now, he takes pride and backfight me... Telling people I got poor hygiene while he never really courted me formally, just on and off. Now, ive ben stuck feeling the for 5yrs now... Now, ive been bashed by his relatives, bullied me, doing anything in order to disturb my peace... I dnt know whats d revenge for??? I talked to him in 2019. I thought it was clear to him but until now, people around him like close friends bully me.......???????
Omg I’m so so sorry to hear . Are you ok?
Fight back .
The fact that he talk about you to all these ppl he feels intimidated by you already do not give him the satisfaction he is lonely deep down
Dang Doc... had no clue you were over 40....Im 45 and unmarried, still trying to figure out why we are still harassing and shaming women about marriage...I just wish people would let us just be..and stop trying to make something wrong with it..I want marriage to happen organically and now out of necessity...
i totally agree! and hang in there!
@@DrJenCaudle and you too💗💗💗💗
Because you're past your fertility window which is basically a womens value on the sexual marketplace. MEN VALUE= Youth, beauty, fertility. WOMEN VALUE= Strength, Experience, long term Security. Both genders looks for opposites. The truth is a women over 40 and unmarried is a loser just like a man who cant provide or lead. We have to start telling younger women the truth instead of being selfish and lying to ourselves.
I totally resonate with what you say.
I mean there aren't a lot of men out here Ready to marry especially FINANCIALLY. they seem to be ready when majority of us are past our prime and the eggs have turned into powder.
You are admirable woman. Nice to be your fan . I love your beautiful smiles, Dr Jen 😍
Aww thanks!
I understand her completely 42 single and no kids
Hang in there sis!
@@DrJenCaudle thank you and same to you 😌
Same here, I just turned 43 not kids not married.
I think you have a great smile ❤Doc
Thanks!
Thanks
Welcome
People often criticize me for saying that I never got married because I never wanted to get married. Have I been asked yes, they were not the right guy for me.
Good for you for doing what is right for you!
I have no doubt Dr Jen you will be a great wife, mom, maybe soul mate is not in the US or another continent
.
Thank yoh
She should be teaching younger women to make better decisions vs lying to herself.
@@housetatum9484 Your hate is real.
There’s nothing wrong with being single, there are some people who are in their 30s, 40s, 50s, 60s and are still single. We have a season, when it’s God’s timing to bless us a partner. Single is a gift, it’s not permanent so use the time to focus and concentrate on yourself.
Absolutely love Dr Jen❤!!! You always look so Beautiful and Classy and definitely a wonderful young Lady ❤❤❤!
Interesting video. Single in 40s and I think I was too picky. I was not picky but that is what people think. So I just go around with that stigma.
Hi,how was your dating with Sebastian from Steve Harvey show.
Didn’t work
She is the one
@@DrJenCaudle you’re too picky. Get an average guy and marry and get it over with already sheesh
You think so?
@@DrJenCaudle yes
DR.Jen,
what a striking beauty you are, all the best to you
Wow, thank you!
I wish you meet your soul mate
Thanks
If you were in thirties , I would definitely take you. But you really worked hard to get there . I am not here to shame you. That is your choice . I like hard working females . Be blessed !
Ok
@@DrJenCaudle Unfortunately I am still single 😂. Where do you live?
@@sweetman5249 I am in my thirties and single.
@@L91-r5b Where do you live? How can I contact you?
@@L91-r5b Send me your insta . I will DM you
Some of us are just not chosen and we have to do it alone. I refer to myself as a leftover.
Honey my insurance is covering my Covid booster
Ok
I want Dr. Jen
Hi!
Don't mean any harm, but I think it's critical to think about all of this during undergrad while being deliberate in dating. In many cases, women headed to graduate or professional schools are extremely focused on academics (I agree, it's necessary) and ignore any suitors during that time. Also, if the guy doesn't fit the description in terms of height, looks, etc. during that time, it's worse (I've seen it). Hopefully, the younger generation is much more deliberate and earlier in life for a fighting chance on getting the results they desire before middle age kicks in.
Good point
Man, i saw her post and she has concluded that her fear of failure in her career is the reason that she is unmarried and without children. I think that she needs to dig deeper.
See, I hear an example of poor values. Her value system suggests that money, a career, and semblance of success (MONEY) is more important than what God loves. See with women like this God and spirituality comes last when it should have been first.
Shouldn’t speak about things you don’t understand
@@Emptytopfloor Empty top floor doesn't deserve a response
yah she is smart and beautiful, it will be hard for her to meet an equal man
Why do you think it’ll be hard?
Dr Jen Caudle please move on with your single life. Singleness is a great option too. Stop talking about marriage and Singleness move on with your life. You didn't make any mistake by choosing not to get married. Be happy with your life and move on.
I’m 36 I’m not married yet don’t have kids
That’s ok 👍🏾
Wow, Mister Kevin Samuels addressed all this so well. They way modern women make horrible decisions and then many blame GOD for their problem, when GOD gives us freedom of will. We make good choices and it is our fault. We make bad choices and it is our fault. Freezing eggs and talking about someone else's marriage being miserable. Kevin Samuels videos are like gold to this. Notice the one woman in white HAS A WEDDING RING ON.
How Old is she?
44
@Dr. Jen Caudle Dang, sis, we are the same age...I easily thought you were mid 30s....
@@DrJenCaudle wow I’m 45
Getting married is your choice. I’m 36 male . Haven’t found the one as yet . But because I’m a workaholic and working under pressure I don’t have much Time to find a date . I spend my late nights at work. It’s a horrible feeling in the morning , my testosterone levels goes high . I’m planning to see a doctor to reduce my testosterone levels. Sometimes I illegally take estrogen to reduce my testosterone levels . It’s horrible when you get in the morning with a high libido. I prefer to be single as I’m used to living an independent life . I sometimes go to restaurants and movies alone . I prefer having low libido.
Oh no! How are you coping with it all?
It’s difficult. But estrogen seems to be working. I just need to reduce my stress level. I like being independent but it doesn’t not paint a good picture for society as you look like the odd one out with no family of your own.
Dude stop taking estrogen it’s not good for you
Well, leave it to me to talk about the elephant in the room and the FACT there are NOT enough qualified REAL men who want to be married and start a family, let alone, had fathers in the home to model healthy love & affection and what it takes to be a high value man, provider and protector of women & family.
High value men “typically” desire women age 22-25 for bearing children and typically do not care about women’s income or educational goals/potential.
She’s beautiful, educated, fit, and has all the qualities of wife material, but not enough mentally & emotionally HEALTHY high value men available to the number of women in her category.
Wishing her and all women w/the same issues & concerns the very best in finding life long love & happiness.
Are you call jef bezoz low value
I would love to one day see you ❤️
I'm from Uganda
👋🏾
I was think she got a man from TV show
Nope!
@@DrJenCaudle don't worry doctor, one day you'll lead a best family ❤
Your amazing a man will be lucky to have you
Thanks
No it's the other way around
I hope Black Americans look into matchmakers while young... if they are busy with school and work then please delegate seeking a spouse. to a matchmaker .. and get feedback and advice form a matchmaker... form early on. Maybe some Black Americans can pick this up as a profession and develop it and make a better system for Black Americans...
ah! yes!
I am single mother of one my prayer to get married to European men I am from Africa in Kenya all my life of in working in Arabian country like a Slave my wish one day to get married to someone will love me and conditioner I don't want to get married to in my country Kenya I wish to get married to European men I am Chabi black from Africa please help me to find the right man age 40 and above
🙏
Just trap him with a baby and get child support. Hurry before you are infertile. Best of luck!
Dr.Jen you are a Beautiful Black Queen. I would be honored to have a chance to get to know you. What would my chances be for that?
Hi
@@DrJenCaudle Dr Jen I am 40 no kids also could me and you maybe chat some I'm interested. Could I give you my email?
It's called hypergamy my darling and/or the proverbial and vaunted "check list". Your pool of suitors is virtually nonexistent.
Good luck on your quest.
Over 40 it’s too late. The only reason to get married is kids. Since that’s out of the question there’s no reason to get married
Huh?
pleease ignore him.
@@RAJOHN-ke7mc yes please ignore medical professionals that deem everything over age 35 as high risk pregnancy and plummeting egg counts. Yes please ignore medical facts.
THE PROBLEM WE WOMEN HAVE IS NOT WHETHER OR NOT WE WILL FIND A MAN BUT ITS IN CASE WE WANT TO HAVE BABIES… YOU CAN MEET THE RIGHT PERSON EVEN IN YOUR 80,s BUT WHAT ABOUT PARENTHOOD?…
A South Asian man would value you. they like doctors.
Really?
Men value youth and fertility.
@@housetatum9484not jef bezoz though 😂
Somehow I can't tolerate my single life anymore and I am finding hard to keep my sanity in days moving by. deep down I had no issue with it but now getting to 40 and I see gene Z all married and having kids I feel like sth hasn't been alright with my life. Maybe high standards faith and falling a bit into grey black purple zone of LGBTQ😂 I really dunno😅 the stigma of staying single with zero bodycount😂 I just can't happen to be able to explain to anyone even new people who shoot messages on dating apps. My look is at least 10 to 15 yrs younger than my age I lived as healthy life style I could do but still have some health issues I need to work on. Maybe youtube is the only place I could get some advice. Even psychiatry specialists don't understand me. I just have not seen any interesting guy, neither in society with I am interacting nor dating apps. Those few like 50 sth people that I liked in a decade, but they never responded. I don't know how to live my life past 40 it may sound funny, but it feels like I am out of time to do many things I like to do.I have no clue how to be normal again
Your husband is here
She’s another Eboni k Williams and vivica a fox. She’ll be a single mom just like Eboni k Williams
Huh?
Feel like this doctor jen maybe just waiting on god i don't believe in my heart you running away from lovme looking Mr right too fine you maybe feel like will have too sacrifice your career for your relationship what I don't understand is why is a woman career more important than they marriage maybe doctor Jen feel like you'd not value but you are it's a lot of young guys out here will date a woman like you beautiful inside and out
Am Emmanuel from Kilifi county. Your so beautiful lady. So that I love you so much
Thanks
You need to try an African man ,you won't regret it
?
@@DrJenCaudle sorry about that
It's wouldn't be fair to the man. Let's be honest for once
Picky yes ur done just stay single u wasted time
U won’t meet him
He is with young girls
I want a 40 year old woman I will marry
Ok
I will get married
Marie me baby
😞
Something is wrong with a lot of these single women over 40. They talk the strong independent thing soooo why are they looking for a man?
What do you mean?
@@DrJenCaudle What have you done to actively attract a man?
I'm not talking about your education or money because honestly most men don't want any of that.
@@DrJenCaudlesee so many women getting deceived by the motto "strong independent black woman". And the sad thing is is that motto has been a double edged sword for many black women. Because it has made the black woman look masculine and not feminine. This has started to push most men away from black women irregardless of how a black woman might think that motto applies to them. I have seen many black female victims crying saying they wish they weren't grouped under said motto. But unfortunately because the motto has been used so much by black women many black women who are not the said motto type gets thrown in the pile. I have two sisters (who are black) who have been "waiting on God to give them a husband". But yet I see them constantly turn down the men God sent their way and go after the low life men.
I am going on a large assumption but you talk maybe as if you believe in God.
And if you do then you have got to try a different approach. If you want a man make sure he is a righteous man first. Why?
Your first mistake is waiting on God... Faith is an action you don't sit down on faith that's why faith without works is dead. So what are the works you need to do?
1. Allow Christ to completely change who you are. You must do the exact things repent of all your sins, be water baptized in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ (many pastors don't preach this), next you must be filled and seal with the holy spirit in your heart (many preachers don't teach this way either but have your pastor "tarry" with you until you are filled in your "heart". You will know when you bear the fruits and signs of the holy spirit. This right here is a huge part of a Godly and blessed marriage. Never ever ever get married until you and your suitor meet this requirement.
2. Next don't date as people in the world date but have a holy courtship that is administered by your pastor, parents and his parents.
3. Be willing to be obedient to God and the leadership of your husband. God gave men and women one specific job each. Women are to be a help mate and men are to rule over women.
[Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.
Genesis 3:16 KJV
And the Lord God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.
Genesis 2:18 KJV
]
4. Let me clarify number 3 the woman is to be a blessing and help to the man and honor him and the only way this can truly be done is if she has applied step 1 to her life.
The man can only lead or rule over the woman not as a "dictator" but a husband if and only if he has applied step number 1 to his life. Because how is the man supposed to lead his wife? In love.
Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;
Ephesians 5:25 KJV
5. Last but not least both of you are you be obedient to God and don't waver. You can't do any of this on your own nor can your suitor because if you want a blessed marriage it must if be ordained by God (step 1), lead with love, and kept with obedience.
It's sad that ministers don't teach this to their congregation. I have seen proof that this does work. And I am living proof when done wrong.
what are you looking for, sis? i'll hook you up.
Lol thanks
Please stop talking about being 40 and never been married that is completely meaningless. What is the meaning of been 40 and never been married it's meaningless.
Marriage is not a must and Singleness is a beautiful option too. Please stop this topic of been 40 and never married it is meaningless.
“She better put it on sale” - Kevin samuels
Huh?
@@DrJenCaudlejust another man with a hateful comment, don’t mind him.
@@eastcoastguy7914 he is right
@@c.f.okonta8815 Kevin Samuel is gone..alone whatever karma he put out for women, he will reap. He left alone with no loved ones on his side. For the rest of us it’s best to put positive energy out there especially towards women so we don’t end up like him. He was in debt living in a rented room in a woman’s home and had not paid her. He has no relationships and was with a random female when this happened. Not surrounded by his children or the love of his life. Those are the real lessons we should learn from this man. His ending showed his reality.
Nope! If a man can't afford her, that's his own fault not hers.
It is not normal to be in our 40s to have never married nor have kids. Something is wrong with women who have neither and in their 40s. Stop coddling women with this BS!
Sorry you feel this way
Ok so say something is wrong with a woman who is not married.
In my case I have attachment issues. What does thay change about your life?
Dr. Jen, I'm 52 and divorced for a while. If you ever want to work on this marriage thing, let's talk! Personally, I'm tired of this single life.
NGL I admit I do feel some degree of shame having been without a partner for over 10 yrs. I am generally quite comfortable being on my own if not for the social pressure, really. But once there are PEOPLE involved in knowing about my single status….that’s when shame sets in. If it is not my marital status that I am embarrassed about, then it would be my age. No win either way. At work, I don’t mind sharing that I am unmarried, but very secretive about my age, or relationship status (I happen to look much younger than my real age and use that to my advantage to mask my shame). And then in my personal life, I am ashamed to reveal my unmarried status to old school mates, distant relatives or people who do know my age, but whom I haven’t seen for a while. It’s only with close friends who are in similar situations as me, whom I don’t mind sharing my age and single status. But I do feel the shame may be limiting me from getting out there and meeting new people as I happen to keep a safe distance owing to this shame. At best I just make acquaintances and nothing more. Dating apps never did it for me, as I was forced to reveal my age on such sites, and immediately lose confidence that people of my age group would not pick me (had only dudes 20 yrs older writing back). Sigh, I wish I could banish the shame. I mean if LGBTQIAs can be out and proud, I don’t know why it’s tough for a straight single to be just as out and Proud too.🤷🏻♀️
Rubbish. Singleness is a great option as well. If you have chosen to be single enjoying it
but don't come here to be discussing marriage that you ignored. Please let married people to be discussing marriage. You don't have the experience to be talking marriage it's not your thing. Move on with your single life.
Something is out of order about her personality and how she interacts with the opposite sex she is the common denominator in all her relationships
Maybe Doc Jen man are intimated by you.
Maybe 🤷🏾♀️
Folks want it all, and they just can't have it all. A lot of American women, in particular specific group, does not prioritize marriage as much as they prioritize their career
🤔
No, a lot of American men, in a particular group, does not prioritize marriage or fatherhood. That's more accurate...you think? The proof is in plain sight.
By the time you get to 40 you have lost what most high value men want, Samuels God rest his soul said it to his death. I wish she had called him and talked to the God Father before his death.
Stop
What the h??? 😂🤣🤣🤣
u crazy
Archaic man
That's true. The only thing I would add is that instead of looking for a “high-value nan,” look for a man who is decent, hard-working and law-abiding, period. High-value men are more than likely unattainable to most women anyway, especially if you have not prepared yourself to be a high-value woman, in terms of being an educated, cultured, well-spoken, disciplined woman and all the other things the godfather talked about.
All these high powered career women have hit "the wall" and are now in the 'acceptance' phase, next comes the 'cat' and red wine phase 😢
You wish.
PART 1: CONSIDER COURTSHIP
Greetings Sis. Caudle, As you expressed your position as to why you have decided to patiently wait for your soulmate, a divine process of marriage came to mind and I felt the need to ask you a question. Have you ever heard of the age-old yet successful marital strategy and process called Courtship?
It’s not dating, rather it is more like a process of determining compatibility by getting to know someone via questions and answers coupled with chaperoned visitation with family or close friends.
Courtship puts the natural attraction of both individuals in check as there is little to no physical contact to interfere with the process of asking and answering questions to determine compatibility. It supersedes dating in that, both parties come to the conclusion that if they are not compatible, there is no harm, no foul, and no physical factor to consider. They just go their separate ways wishing the other well.
Most beneficial about Courtship is, both parties MUST BE interested in getting married to even begin the courtship process. Also, that the two are willing to commit to the process of courtship if they are both in agreement that if they are compatible, marriage is on the horizon.
Contrary to the 21st Century Dating Scene, I find that courtship narrows that field from those who are leisurely dating to those who are seriously interested in marriage.
I pray that this information is of value on your divine path towards completion. I pray that you are blessed with the utmost success in your quest in finding the mate of your soul.
How old is your guy?
Don’t have one
MAMMA MIA TIME FOR EVERYTHING JUST BELIEVE BEAUTIFUL (()) PRINCESS ((()))
😄
Single at 30 and over, you are either the best of the best or the worst of the worse. No in between.
What?
@@DrJenCaudle question, what happened to all the men you have dated in the past? How comes non of them chose to marry you? Were they all bad people?
@@Nondisclosed Ask the men who are over 40 and unmarried. This is not 1920.
@@misssterling3094 it’s pathetic comparing over 40 unmarried men to over 40 unmarried women. Men can naturally have kids in their 70s. Can women do the same?
@@Nondisclosed those kids come out with genetic abnormalities
BEAUTIFUL (())PRINCESS (()) PLEASE I CALL YOU
😁