Smart Monkey Conspiracy
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- Опубликовано: 24 авг 2024
- Smart Monkey Theory
Just a quick preamble before the video starts just want to say huge thanks for 10k I didn’t actually think I would hit 1k nevermind 10 but thanks to everyone ill have more to say towards the end of the video about the state of the channel and other upcoming milestones and what we could do for them but before that I hope you enjoy the video. So I was just chilling on Instagram reels as you do and after watching about 3 fatal car accidents that are recommended to me daily for no reason whatsoever thanks Zuckerberg, I stumbled across this video about this monkey in the zoo, now I’ve seen this video before and it always struck me as super weird, to begin with he’s standing in such a non-monkey way on both his feet completely upright and the shiftiness in his eyes indicate that he is clearly aware of something that is pretty important, also the fact that he makes eye contact with both the woman and then the camera and afterwards just puts on one of the most sinister looking smiles I’ve ever seen, that is the face of a monkey that knows something very dark and devious and it revels in the fact you are oblivious to that knowledge. it displays a sense of intelligence that is an order higher than you would normally see in animals, it usually goes being able to reproduce, make tools, communicate, and at the very top I’m going to put the wherewithal to conceal intelligence now why would a monkey want to conceal that they have intelligence? You want to know what my theory is? Well, I believe that monkeys are just as capable as us humans and id say they are of equal intelligence however they have all decided collectively to play dumb just to avoid having to work and pay taxes. Now, bear with me okay, you might have heard of the saying the only thing in life that is guaranteed is death and taxes well I looked at this quote for multiple hours the other day and I’m still yet to see a clause that says except if you’re a monkey so why are we not utilizing them as human capital. Send them monkeys to the mines, I know it's just a meme and they weren’t actually used in diamond mining but have you seen a monkey's physique they would crack rocks like they already crack skulls. Today im going to convince you that monkeys have human intelligence by looking at the brains of monkeys, monkey behaviour caught on camera, and of course, monkeys that have already been used in employment, by the end of the video you will either be convinced I’m crazy or will also be a monkey truther. So let's take a look at the differences between human and monkey brains to assess whether this intelligence that they may hide is even possible. The primates with the highest IQ are orangutans which are sitting quite nicely at 75 IQ this already puts them on par or smarter than about 6% of the population of the US and higher if you are looking worldwide so the odds are quite high that you have met someone that is dumber than a monkey. Comparing brain sizes humans have a brain that is about 3 x bigger than orangutans and the areas that we commonly associate with intelligence and higher-order thinking are two times more developed in humans than in monkeys. With that being said humans are actually an outlier having an abnormally large brain and the fact of the matter is that you don’t actually need a large brain to be able to contribute to GDP, I mean just look at people who make podcasts 99% of them are specialists in fence-sitting and couldn’t come up with an original thought to save their lives but they still contribute to society, kind of, sometimes. Orangutans can learn directly from us humans and Orangutans are also one of the few animals that are actually in the Stone Age, by that I mean they use stone tools and create sharp objects with hammer rocks, but this tool use was only observed in orangutans in captivity that learned from humans. So what’s to stop me from creating a monkey school that raises monkey builders from infancy into adulthood and given the fact that they are not humans we can pay them In bananas instead of real money so effectively we can bring back modern-day, hey editor stick here we are cutting this joke short because uh yea that’s why glad we all come to an understanding.
This is one of the rare times I'm actually happy about RUclips recommending a small channel
Same here
So usually you dont like when youtube recommends small channels?
Fr
@@40oz82 a lot of the time they small for a reason 💀
@@3_ormorecharacters consoomer
Funnily enough in 1631 dutch explorer Jacobus Bontius reported that the Malay people had informed him that Orangutans could talk but didn't "lest he be compelled to labor".
That story is partly the inspiration of this video
So has someone who works with them and is an expert i don't remember what her name is
@@StoicStickim in your walls
@@lieutenant8968 bro does NOT have skibidi dibity rizz 😭🗿🙏
@@imgonnacream people who think skibidi toilet is funny are "the 6% of people" mentioned in the video 2:28
The simians yearn for the mines
Donkey Kong Country
A tropical monkey yearns for mines
“Monkey put me out of a job”
"Monkeys conceal intelligence so they don't have to pay taxes"
So unironically return to monke?
Yes
Can't wait for the Tax Fraud tutorial! I need some new tax fraud mates!
tax fraud tutorial
1- tax
2- fraud
Im not a fed, tell me more
@@user-bd8mi3jt4m
tax fraud tutorial
1. tax
2. fraud...
im officially transhuman, as in i no longer wanna be human, imma be monke
Fraudmaxxing
I dont want a face reveal, faces are for statues, and iconography.
The main content will always be faceless but the other thing i have planned it would be hard to do without
Faces aren't for iconography, boso.
Monke sees tax, refuse to pay, stay ignorant
> Real phanum tax
I was walking through the zoo years ago and enjoying myself, it was a nice day. I was with my kid, and It was either our first time there, or I'd never been to the orangutans before. I walked up to the plexiglass like I had to all of the other exhibits, but when I looked at that, person, I'm going to call it a person, I was speechless in a way I still can't find words for.
It felt so wrong, so morally wrong to my very core to be looking at what felt like a person behind that glass. That was a person and they knew they were a person, and they knew that I knew that they were a person. I was visibly appalled and in shock and they just looked at me like "what, first time?".
Then, the very quickly turned and grabbed an old burlap sack and climbed up to one of their beds and covered their faces. I stood there looking for I don't even know how long, they only peeked out at me one time and then rolled over.
"I have something super cool planned, it may not be entirely legal-"
BRUH
@Believein-JesusChrist
"Stop spamming, bots are annoying."
- Sun Tzu, Art of Cat.
Orangutans spend time upright around humans. The older and bigger they get, the more intriguing the behaviour. Sepilok in Borneo is recommended. Orangutans or ‘old men of the forest’ are also extremely good climbers. They are versatile in their environment. They are also very strong. Females with babies will defend them with their life and yours if you don’t withdraw when asked. Elephants and orangutans share the same ability to read human body language. Orangutans like bright colours. I have seen one rip a dress off a visitor because this lady refused to follow instructions about dress code around these animals. The orangutans worst enemy is……….
is... what? is what?
me.
@@thatdude9091 nearly correct. Palm nuts.
“Upon realization that he was infact geeking out”
I died lol
Monkey business is boomin
Monkey stock goes crazy🔥
Return to monke ❌
Advance to monke ✅
My mom just entered my room, then gave me a banana while I was watching this.
I think she was trying to tell you something
When life gives you banana
i am the smartest monkye
No me
No me
No me
You ain't that guy pal
No me
I have been a monkey believer ever since I saw how people act in the big subreddits, AI is too smart and inorganic to be that
”Monkeys can’t pay taxes, they don’t understand it!”
Dou you understand taxes?
Humans: Return to Monkie
Monkey: Be
Here's the crazy thing about taxes: The business you work for has to pay taxes for the money they generate and pay you, you then have to again pay taxes on your income, you then have to pay taxes for items that you buy, which in turn the business has to pay taxes on and it's a never ending cycle on paying taxes!
ROCK AND STONE FOREVER!! (not related to the video)
Yes it is, don't lie.
U referring to crack?
@@colostomybag9201deep rock really needs to invest in some better equipment!
Rock and Stone, Brother
FOR KARL!
please keep staying off your meds
Confederates taking notes rn 🤔
they already used monkeys
Was going to say that orangutans are apes rather than monkeys, except that there's so much irreverent content on this channel that I suspect it might be intentional just to troll people like me. At any rate, the very fact that this channel makes me wonder about such things is worth something.
Apes are monkeys. Specifically old world monkeys. Just because they lost their tails doesn't mean they lost their ancestral clade, too.
@@MrSephirothJenova yep
"today Im gonna convince you that monkeys have human intelligence" 💀
I mean, humans are just great apes.
I think.
monkee fed spotted
Come on bro its not even that funny of a quote
@@BillimanMCjon "Monkey behavior caught on camera"
Please get me that tax fraud tutorial before April preferably
Your channel is insanely underrated and I'm sure you'll get to 100k in no time!
Monkey conspiracy go brrrrrrr, me monke, no modern
Do a balls reveal at 25k
Do this for elephants and crows, and octopi
Just other borderline sapient animals if not there for elephants
Recently discovered your channel haven’t been so quickly invested into a channel amazing content very engaging entertaining and informative amazing work and I’m honestly really happy I came across this masterpiece of a channel
Thanks, ill make sure to keep making good content 🫡🫡🫡
@StoicStick well thank you bro ill be with ur during your entire RUclips journey from the start and tovthe end watching you grow don't forget me when u make it big man ill be watching bro with the most love and support ❤️
I was their when it happened that monkey, no not a monkey that thing I swear it turned around while I was making fun of it and then bam. *Was up my homie* and then runs away.
You were THERE **** you're correct that it isn't a monkey. It n is an orangutan, which is an ape. Apes are not monkeys
Watching this 4 months after the video was published and hearing "thx for 10k" and seeing 101k subs.. well deserved for sure
maybe, instead of monke not being taxed so it can work for us, we can all work at a job monke could do so the salary is so small it doesn't get taxed. that's what I was doing until not long ago, though for different reasons
I love how this channel has turned it into a satirical conspiracy channel😂
Also one to reveal all our monkey war crimes🐒
Bruh, you're like the new gradeaundera. I'm absolutely certain your channel is going to blow up if you keep posting content like this.
Truly Money-Pilled
Getting pretty close to that 100k face reveal yo. But I am a lot more interested in the tax evasion tutorial, please and thank you.
Stoic remember me when you get famous pls you have tons of potential
Orangutans are the coolest creatures. Their babies are cute and their adults are endearingly goofy.
Monkey do pay taxes tho,gotta give banana to the tally man and he gotta tally da banana
To be fair we don't have to work or pay taxes either. There's plenty of ants to eat in the park and you can get them out of their holes with sticks and pine needles.
There are countries that have no taxes like north korea or monaco
Just 5 months to get to 110k from 10k... Nice job man! Keep up the good shit
I've always thought 'better to be underestimated, than overestimated' and a lot of how I live and the things I've done with my life reflect that. Maybe I'm over that bell curve? I dunno, I dunno much of anything really.
I do see that impenetrable wall. We must find a way though! You got my sub, great channel!
25k face reveal
11k+ Lord stoic stick for a reason🛐
6:36 missed opp to say monkey business 💀
seeing him say thanks for 10k subs then looking at his subscriber count and it being over 100k 4 months later is wild
Wow, 1k to 10k this fast is actually impressive, I think we might hit 100k before the end of April
This man has a plan.
How the elder orangutan at the zoo acts to people after he told me when I was alone with him in an even better english that mine that our extinction is imminent: 🙊🙈🙉
Orangutans being the best monke as always
Orangutan are not monkeys
You should make a video on Periodmaxxing
there are 9 movies on why this is a bad idea
The surprisingly coherent ramblings of an absolute madman... Carry on 👍
Put the tags in the tags section, i think that usually works better (Below advanced options when uploading a video)
Bro took "return to monke" literally.
And they commit less crimes 👀👀
no. look up some incidents where people tried to live with monkeys, especially Shimpanzees. Or better, don't look it up.
@@juliusapriadime when i read about how a oranguntan ripped a caretaker in half with ease: 💀
@@juliusapriadi 13% of chimpanzees commit 51% of the crimes
@@juliusapriadichimpanzees aren’t very representative of apes as a whole. Orangutans and gorillas are gentle giants who won’t bother you unless you make a gigantic mistake. Chimpanzees will rip your face off simply for their own amusement
@@fish5671 he said less crimes. No "no crimes". How many crimes monkeys comited in your coutry last year compared to humans, huh?
I love love love Stoic's originality (╥﹏╥)
God damn I wasn't expecting Jack the signal baboon to appear
You look out your window tonight and see a group of oragutans gathering outside...
I am once again asking for us to Return to monke
He's practicing for his audition for Godzilla X Kong.
Not having a face reveal is like having the benefits without concequences.
You convinced me with the title alone.
this is honestly one of my favorite new channels. watch every video
At the pace your growing you will be at 100k in no time!
Do every method to commit insurance fraud xD
ayy ive been here before 10k
also fix your descriptions please. make em a bit nicer. tho maybe im one of the only people who still reads (or at least tries to read) those
Im not sure what to put in the description tbh i dont have any links or anything
congrats on 10k
Super sick to see your growth over such a short period of time, very inspiring. I love the variety of interesting subjects. Keep up the great work!
*Homeless people have entered the chat.*
This made me ponder
I love you so much.
What are your economic views?
Capitalism but with regulation
@@StoicStick Oh.. i don't like it because it's helping companies become monopoly..
Btw i really think you'd like to read about georgism
Yea anti monopoly laws are part of the regulation
@@StoicStickI have a meme for that, why can't I send it here..
Anyways, there's lobbyists and corruption, if you are giving unlimited power for the state to do what they want with the monopolys, so it will end up bad..
But that's my views
Anyways thank you for the reply:) I'm glad to hear it's capitalism because if not i would unsubscribe...
Tax is a robbery and so on..
I unfollowed because these aren’t monkeys. Monkeys are primates, they are not Great Apes. Monkeys also have tails. You called a gorilla a larger monkey. Dang
Celebrating 10k 4 months ago and now you’re at 100k 😂
2:02 why did I immediately think of the 1700s?
You think they're smart until you let them loose in a CVS
I'll never get my bike back
Hey, why did you have to tell everyone? I had a good thing going here.
Stoic Stick why are you so stick?
What's brown and sticky
@stupiditiusmaximus the dude named Jamal who I ran over
A branch?@@stupiditiusmaximus
I've unironically went into deep thought about this when I was stoned once
I think same true humans. I think this is how savant syndrome works. A teacher teacher (teacher of teachers) can teach themselves how to teach better.
You dont have to create this conspiracy theory on monkeys to tell me that income tax should be abolished.
As definitely not an orangutan we just don't want to pay taxes
Are you Lord Frieza?
THIS GUY HIGH AS GIRAFFE ASS IF HE CAME UP W THIS STUFF
This guy's channel is for a hidden gem
Lord Miles🐵
Holy s*it he grew 40k in a month
your videos are a treat
ngl surprised he didn't bring up Ancient Egyptain Bamboon Police
I’m convinced a lot of animals are capable but it’s not that they don’t want to pay taxes, we as a species just refuse to take it far enough to actually prove it be it because we fear their potential wrath or depose sharing a world with other intelligent life and having more civil rights issues.
The youtuber count dankula did a video on a smart orangutans escaping the zoo multiple times. His name is ken allen.
I like how the joke on intelligent animals that everyone makes the joke that they’re avoiding taxes.
Lets keep going to 75k, I need the tax fraud tutorial for... reasons lmao
I’d say they’re smarter or as smart as 13% of the population of America
Zzzzzzzz
All animals are super intelligent and if they're around humans enough you will see them all act out of character.
i dont think its a conspiracy it makes tooooo much sense
I think this is the funniest video that you made atleast the ones i saw.