0:00 Who Is Lauren Chen? 9:38 Lauren vs Miley Cyrus 21:55 Feminist Art 26:32 A Worldwide Problem 34:46 What Is a Social Construct? 42:34 Won’t Someone Think of the Children! 46:14 Lauren Doesn’t Know What A Social Construct Is 54:37 Lauren’s Secret Feminist Side Is Showing… 1:03:31 Bi and Pan Erasure Is Not OK 1:06:07 Lauren Loves Marriage 1:28:24 Lauren Doesn’t Know What Feminism Is 1:36:42 Feminism Is Not Anti-Family 1:42:32 Lauren Doesn’t Understand Working Class Struggles 1:59:58 The History of Women’s Reproductive Health 2:10:35 The Truth About Crisis Pregnancy Centres 2:22:56 I’m Sure Lauren Loves Criticism
Capitalism actually saves from Nature. But did we become a successful species for millions of years before we invented capitalism. Maybe home water Birth
@@DustLion No, women need feminism to get even just basic human rights in a patriarchal society with capitalism as the global economic ssystem that are simply rewarded to boys (and therefore future men) by a matter of birthright and with no questions asked and no work necessery for males to earn them through merit.
I've said it before and I'll say it again. Everyone who doesn't have kids because they "Just don't want any" is doing more for child welfare than every emotionally distant, neglectful parent out there.
Believe it or not my emotionally distant neglectful abusive parents did way more for me than “just not having me”. Life finds a way and parents suck, doesn’t mean the kids will suck.
Rachel, I’ve been watching your videos since I was 16 (I’m 21 now) and want to say- thank you so much for your videos. I hope this doesn’t sound weird but you’re kind of like a parasocial older sister to me because your content is educational and has taught me very useful things as a woman I would not have otherwise known. Your videos about feminism and women’s issues have really helped me deconstruct much of the shame I have regarding sex and sexuality. I also love how queer-friendly your content is and makes me as a bisexual (and possibly ace?) person feel accepted. Love your channel and what you do
Yess I felt that!!! I would probably never have been able to leave my abusive relationship had i not begun watching specifically Rachel. Her content is so empowering. You go girl🥺❤️
Same here , I was deep in the cult of Christianity at the time and her videos really helped me to come back to myself and repair the damage that my abusive home life and church had done to me as a queer person :,) so thankful for this channel
That's such a great comment. I'm almost a generation older than you (soon 40) and I'm so happy to see young creators like Rachel positively affecting young women!
Same here!! I’ve been watching Rachel for about 3 years since I was 18 and her breakdowns of feminism and girl defined and fundamentalism really really helped me in my deconstruction from a religion that was a bit of a cult. Rachel, I love how kind you are and compassionate and I for one really appreciate the love you put into your videos💜
@@RachelOates You didn't know about Lauren until Kit uploaded that video a month ago??? I watched Lauren for years. Whatever you think of Lauren's politics, you must admit that her beauty is hypnotic 💫
It made my heart so happy that you mentioned taking care of aging relatives, instead of having kids. I’m 29 with no kids and I have taken care of my grandma and papa the last two years. (My papa passed away a week ago, on 12/28 :,( but I’m still taking care of grandma. It has made my heart so full, and I knew it was my purpose. I do want to have kids in the future, but I always thought “doesn’t it make sense to take care of the people who are already here, rather than create more people who need to be taken care of?” I wouldn’t have been able to take care of them if I would have gotten married and had kids young, like I always thought I would.
I grew up in a conservative Christian home and adopted a lot of conservative attitudes and beliefs by default. I had zero interest in feminism, saying identical things that these women did. But I learned the hard way how wrong I was. This whole line of thinking reminds me of people who pushed back against vaccines and social distancing during the early pandemoniumic. I saw a health official say the hard part of doing what we had to do was that reducing the spread would make people think it was all unnecessary. Mild cases would give people the idea that the risk was overstated. But if the death and illness rate is reduced, it’s proof that what we did worked. These women are living the benefits of feminism and telling feminists their work and beliefs are pointless. They may go through life blissfully unaware but I hope they learn, and I don’t even wish them the hard ways of learning though it’s more likely than not it will happen.
you are ignoring a lot of things...if i explained exactly what happened during co-vidit clearly my comment will probably disappear. Also in west women would have gained their rights even without feminism?
When more qualitian man can't get job and as any value Rachel hers say quota Systems male homelessness do to child support and alimony is because of feminism. And new Jersey wasn't trying to help the homeless just that More Women getting more money being more liable for alimony so the state ended life time alimony and 2 years later became number1 in reducing chronic homeless so it seems the other way around blaming capitalism for problems caused by feminism. Rachel herself in this says women need feminism to Pass the blame for all problems especially those caused by their own choices
'' There are layers to this body Primal sex and primal shame They told me I should cover it So I went the other way I was tryin' to own my power Still I'm tryin' to work it out And at least it gives the papers somethin' they can write about"' This is from a Miley Cyrus song , it stuck with me since the first time I listened to it. I think every women can relate at some level, it is a very complicated and most of the times a traumatic journey to become a woman in a patriarchal society. And I cant imagine how f up it must be in an industry, controlled by men .
Virginity testing is still a thing in Romania. My godmother took her daughter to get examined when she was 18. Even my religious mother thought it was horrible. I can't imagine having to interact with my mother after if she ever did that. I think it's officially illegal now, but there are doctors that still offer this examination. It really higglights for me how poor the education doctors receive in my country is
@@lizzybeary the United States also has notoriously poor Sex education. It’s definitely most prevalent in nations with poor Sex ed and/or a high prevalence of religiosity.
They have clinics that exist to "restore" the hymen (Im speaking usa and canada) It's utter BS! The hymen ISNT a proof of anything. Some girls have none. Some break it during sport, or falling. Some have a thick one. Etc. It's F disgusting.
@@lizzybeary like @melsoft121 said, we're both religious countries with poor sex education. Sad, but not unexpected. Hopefully we all get rid of this stupid practice as soon as we can
Poorly educated and money-hungry. no doubt some of these doctors know what they're doing is BS but seeing that it's illegal some ppl might pay a pretty penny to circumvent the law.
Marriage is a big boost to my life because im disabled. Marrying my husband lets me be on his insurance, lets us both get cheaper college, lets me easily allow him into doctors appointments and hospital rooms. People don't question "my husband" like they do "my boyfriend" But thats just for me. The vast majority of people don't need to worry about that. Amazingly marriage is a personal decision and not for everyone. Its up to each couple to decide whats best for their personal circumstances, some people might benefit a lot from marriage, some might not. ALSO! As I tell everyone: My husband and I have experienced NO DIFFERENCE from dating to engaged to marriage.
This is a great point. My husband and I do experience a lot of differences now that we're married, but that's mostly due to the US healthcare system being a dumpster fire as opposed to us actually feeling differently.
Thank you for contextualizing hateful content with history and research. It is so helpful to put words to why messages like Lauren’s hurt in such a personal way. Misogyny comes from ugly history and leads to real harm today. I so appreciate that your videos stand on their own in this way.
I just rediscovered your channel and i want to say that your discussion of virginity, relationships ect. made me feel included and acknowledged. I'm ace and demiromantic and very often discussions around these topics exclude or misrepresent the ace community. So i just want to say thanks and I'll be subscribing to your channel.
@warlordofbritannia demisexual typically is someone won't find any sexual attraction to someone until they've formed a very strong intimate emotional bond. Essentially having to establish a relationship of some kind before sexual or romantic feeling can develop.
@@warlordofbritannia I'm asexual which means I'm not sexually attracted to anyone. Demiromantic means that I experience romantic attraction after I've formed a close bond to someone.
@@anonymousperson2839I'm asexual but I don't see how demisexual is any different to the "norm" in the sense that most people wouldn't be romantically or sexually attracted to someone they don't really know? Like most people I've spoken to who aren't on the ace spectrum/LGBTQIA+ community feel like that. Most people aren't into hookups etc.
@@fawn2911 Some people are able to feel sexually or romantically attracted to people they barely know/have not known for a long time. Some people need more time before they can physically start experiencing these emotions.
I found Lauren's comments of bisexuality and pansexuality extremely myopic and it still carries the old stereotype of "you aren't bi/pan, if you're with a guy". I'm still going to be a bisexual women if I'm dating a guy or a woman. I find the soul of a person beautiful, and I don't need my relationships to validate my sexual/romantic identity. I'll never get married, I don't want to make the mistake of marrying the wrong person and then going through the stress of finding that I'm only doing it for the sake of it. I have the autonomy over my own life to make these decisions, I can date and stay in a relationship for a long-term relationship without the need of wanting to get married, a piece of paper doesn't determine love for that person. Some people don't want to get married for many reasons: Fear of commitment It's just a pain in the ass to plan the wedding.
@@zeebirdVille is a notorious troll across a lot of RUclips who primarily targets the comments section of women and LGBTQ+ content creators. They keep getting banned from the platform and keep coming back with new usernames. They just a sad little troll with nothing better to do so please don’t take them seriously or give them any attention.
@@zeebirdummm no. Being straight is not a choice. It is just what you are or are not. I don't choose who I am attracted to, my brain just does that. You don't really choose what your favorite color is your brain just does that. You don't really choose what your favorite song is your brain just does that
@@UlexiteTVStoneLexiteZeebird wasn't saying that being straight is a choice!! They were replying to a now-deleted comment which I'm guessing said being lgbtq+ is a choice and we're using the straight question to counter that
I had a big argument with one of my parent's friends because she was saying she's never been discriminated against and that just doesn't happen now. I've literally had a manager say in a job interview that I didn't get a job because he didn't like working with women and when i told her that she told me it was my fault I didn't sue him. Would've loved to, but it was just me he said it to, so it was my word against his. I'm truly not sure how all these women are making it to adulthood without experiencing any sexism. It blows my mind.
I actually think most women and minorities who make these claims tend to limit their definition to 'not been physically assaulted', or sometimes they have been gaslit into believing it. Conversely I don't know anyone who is part of a minority who hasn't experienced discrimination on some level, and I've never known a woman who hasn't confided with me about misogyny they've experienced. Even I've experienced prejudice, I'm a white, cis-het man and I've experienced classicism. Discrimination is so prevalent it's everywhere in our society, which is why it's so important to teach people about systemic discrimination.
@@angelhellokitti I'm choosing to read your comment in good faith and in that sense, I see where you're coming from (I have a friend who's determined to assume that every time someone treats her in a way she dislikes, it's because she's a young woman or a person of our nationality. I've witnessed situations where she claimed that, meanwhile I could see that it's not what happened). On the other hand, the OP here said that she didn't get a job and the manager openly said it's because HE DOESN'T LIKE WORKING WITH WOMEN. If that's not literally gender discrimination (which makes her a victim of sexism), then I don't know what is. The manager even felt so comfortable about his views that he didn't bother coming up with a fake reason. [edited for clarity]
i used to follow her reaaaallly long time ago like in my anti SJW phase when Lauren had only 2=3 videos on her channel and was called Roaming Millenial. i swear she wasnt this insane
Same. I slowly stopped watching her videos because her content just kept getting more ridiculous. I found myself eye rolling so often, I thought, why do I still watch this crap lol. In the beginning I remember her being fairly reasonable in her criticism towards feminism and sjw stuff. But somehow shes gone to full blown right wing pandering mode.
I think it's a very easy route to go: from moderate and reasonable criticism of something to leaning full-on into bashing it. She must have gotten a lot of positive feedback from the right side of the political spectrum and decided that hey, if that's what people like, I'll give them more of it. First step onto a slippery slope, very hard to avoid unless you're very clear and honest with yourself on what your views actually are and are not.
I could be very wrong about Miley Cyrus but if I’m not mistaken, there actually were “stunts” that she pulled some time ago to be scandalous. But my understanding is that it was a strategic thing to get the conservatives who owned her brand to cut ties with her and set her free. Like there was that whole Robin Thicke twerking thing and whatever else. Then once her ploy worked, she seemed totally normal and professional (because she actually always WAS; she just had to do what she had to do)
@@ninawth whoah, hey, slow down! I’m not stating this as a fact. It’s just something plausible I heard that I didn’t fact check because I don’t care enough about the topic.
This makes sense, I also believe that it was because once a Disney child tries to leave and do more “adult” things when it comes to acting and singing, Disney kind of follows them around and people put this sort of expectation of them to act like a Disney kid still.
“Living together and marriage have little in common.” That’s such a funny statement to me. I was living with my partner for two years before we married and I honestly forget sometimes that we’re married. Nothing’s really changed for us because we were already acting like a committed couple beforehand and everyone in our lives treated us as such. Unfortunately, the United States treats domestic partners differently from married couples so we had to work within those systems. Thank you for this video. It’s possibly one of the most concise arguments against anti-feminism. With Lauren, it really comes down to her not recognizing her privilege and saying that no one needs feminism because she doesn’t need it. She can’t examine that people have lived differently than she has.
This is so much the sickness of "the world is small and inflexible; everyone is, or should be, just like me; anything else is bad / evil / delusional". It's so sad.
I hate to disagree with you but there is a test for virginity. You need to find 2 snails, whisper the name of the person you want to test to their ears, bring them the nearest botanic garden during full moon, play them a song by Berry White, go back home and return during the next full moon and if you can still find them and they've made baby snails then the person isn't a virgin But seriously, ❤ your content. Thank you ❤
Avocado toast: £5, once per month. Rent: £1320 per month. Having a child: £250,000. Lauren, shut the hell up about the toast. I'd have to have given it up before Judaism was invented to have saved up enough to raise a child.
@@FocusedFighter777 yep, I love children but they will push you to your breaking point and beyond, you need to be so strong and patient and truly love that child with every fiber of your being
I can't believe she used that as a legitimate talking point. I knew avocado toast has often been used to derisively refer to Millennials being...I don't know, Millennials...but I didn't think anyone actually believed that that one food, which not everyone even likes, is a major cause of financial hardship for young people, and if they just gave it up they'd be fine. Also, the price of avocados varies depending on where you live. If you happen to live in a region that produces avocados (such as California), they can actually be relatively cheap. And even in regions where avocados need to be shipped to, they're not THAT much more expensive that most of the other "standard" produce you find at the grocery store. They cost more than an apple, sure, but they're far from being a luxury good.
I really don’t understand how avocado toast is considered to be some kind of luxury food. I think one person said this and now it gets repeated with absolutely no research. Where I live, avocados are like $1.50.
I did not know who Lauren Chen was, but 15 sec into this video and when she opened her mouth, i was like, OH DAMN, she's gonna be those types of insufferable characters to deal with. Rachel, i don't know how you keep your sanity together researching these types of individuals, but you're a better person than i am
All the best luck with getting diagnosed and treated properly as soon as possible. I hope You're not overworking Yourself too much with all this great content - so many long videos lately and I've enjoyed every single one :)) I was raised in a strict catholic household with lots of harmful beliefs and hearing You debunking them is so informative and healing. Thank You! Also, I wish we as women would finally stop feeling the need to apologize for being emotional, because there's literally nothing wrong with it. Looking forward to the next upload
The part about how birth control can provide not only sexual freedom but also freedom from painful periods really hit hard for me. I have the Mirena IUD, and it is honestly one of the best things I've ever done. Even though it was extremely painful to have it put in (which is a whole other issue having to do with sexism in medicine), it still has made my life so much better. No more trying to remember to take a pill every day, no more 7 day long periods with extreme cramping, mood swings, and hormonal acne. It truly is so freeing and I just have to say I fucking love feminism.
@VColossalV No, the fact that they don't provide anesthetic for a really painful procedure like that is. It was absolutely the most pain I've ever experienced, with extreme cramping for weeks after, and it's absolutely bonkers that pain relief isn't provided.
@@VColossalV It's rare to give pain relief for it. That's why it's a sexism issue. The pain that women experience isn't taken seriously. It's not just my gyno
@@kyliewalker1927 That doesn't need to be a sexism issue, in fact I don't even know how you could possibly determine that to be a sexism issue. Be careful when calling things sexist, because it's doing that which gave an entire counter culture movement ammunition to spread their agenda. We don't need to go into other examples of people using the term "sexism" or "racism" a little too liberally. We shouldn't be calling people who wear a sombrero or other items of clothing racist because they're culturally appropriating, same thing. By going to extremes we create extremes.
30:07 I love, love, love when you quote research and provide sources! I used to work in refugee resettlement and getting clients with FGC was very common. So common, we attended mandatory training that was trauma-informed in order to provide appropriate care/services to people who had experienced this. While I dont disagree this is a horrific practice, I have generally been taught to use the term Female Genital Cutting instead of mutilation to remove stigma from the survivor of this practice who may be seeking care (both mentally and physically) in a country that does not practice FGC. Lots of these people come seeking gynecology care and face shame for their ignorance of health information that is very common for others. Thank you so, so much for discussing this topic in hopes of removing barriers to mental and physical health for people with vulvas/uterus/etc ❤
Another interesting thought on the "have I ever been oppressed?" Question. If you asked me that a year ago, I would have said I never faced oppression and never was denied opportunities because of my gender. Now that I've started reconsidering things, I can see how taking into account subtle changes actually drastically changes my answer. I have felt oppressed before, because I have been asked to monitor my clothing choices for the sake of the cultural expectation of women and men in my life. I have never been denied opportunities that I can think of, but I have been discouraged from them and given less support than my male counterparts, the opportunities I have had in religious settings have been limited and devalued because of my gender, and I have been told by others, even if they could not enforce it, that I was not allowed to make certain desisions because of my gender. And I think it lends an interesting point. Some of feminism is education. I'm sure a good many women didn't feel oppressed by not having the right to get a job or to vote, because it never even occured to them that it was oppressive. I am a Cis White Woman who grew up sharing the religion and worldview of the majority in the culture I was raised in. Without considering nuance, my life seemed just fine, so it didn't occur to me until I was exposed to different worldviews how much I was actually being oppressed.
13:20 I'm also childfree by choice. For many reasons, like not wanting kids, not wanting to be pregnant and GIVE BIRTH. But the environment is also a factor
Must be so painful for ya lonely cat ladies to see mothers living meaningful lives and that'll have their kids and grandkids keeping them company in old age 😢... Keep selling your lies to the young
I accidentally found one of those clinics when i was in my early 20's. They were supposed to offer free pregnancy tests. I couldn't get the test without sitting thru them telling me about the dangers of abortions. I didn't say shit about an abortion. There was only one women in the building and she was very pushy about telling me about the pain i would go thru. She wouldn't listen about just getting a blood test. Left and went to a queer youth clinic. They called a dr in to give me a test. When i told him i was scared because i couldn't afford a child he helped find a clinic that was safe.
Omgggg thank you Rachel for this video!! I remember way back in the day, when I was a liberal, I was actually sold for a bit on Lauren Chen's shenanigans. Back when she was called "Roaming millenial". She's got a lot of bad views, so I'm always surprised as to how little she's criticized!
I used to follow her around the roaming millennial time too and found her really conflicting because she goes against her own interests so often and doesn't realise it
Same, I used to appreciate her nuanced perspective but then eventually she just started pandering and said something kinda racist and even said she'd give up her right to vote as a woman bc it would benefit conservatives 😬
@@meegy2I learned this lesson about nuance the hard way. I don’t mind hearing nuanced takes on social issues as long as the person’s views are grounded in human decency. I hesitate to say progressive because progressives can be 💩 people too but many people who don’t identify as progressive do have values that can be considered progressive (anti racism, gender equality, income equality, etc).
I used to watch her during my edgy anti feminist phase. Glad I got out of that one. Can't wait to hear you unpack her content while I work on knitting the blanket I'm making
@@VColossalV shoe makes good content in the sense that she provides funny shit to laugh at. can't take her seriously after years of proudly waving her relationship with armored skeptic + admitting to literally dickworshiping him, only for him to break up w her on her 30th birthday. the joke write themselves 💀 i don't feel bad for her and nobody should take her opinions seriously
I feel you're being extremely charitable towards Lauren by saying she's a victim. She's not someone who's been living in isolation and poverty with limited access to information to educate herself, she's had all those opportunities and still chose this path. She's no more a victim than Dave Rubin or Milo Yiannopolous.
I suppose a victim in the sense that even with all this access to opportunities their dignity is so non existent that they are willing to be token mouthpieces for people who hate them
@@alyssapinon9670just because she’s a woman doesn’t make her a victim. such people are called grifters. those who see information but wish to ignore it to pander to certain audiences to make money off of them.
@@umustwin She’s a victim, because she has been harmed by the very beliefs and content she espouses and produces. Just because she became a victim by identifying with those who harmed her does not make her any less of a victim or undeserving of empathy. I don’t think any victims should be blamed for becoming a victim, it doesn’t matter who the victim is, the nuance is important to distinguish.
@@MetastaticMaladies extremely retarded take. face-eating leopards meme explains everything succinctly. but i guess in the west it is better to victimize yourself/someone to absolve oneself from responsibility. ‘the nuance’ is that not pearl, not andrew tate, not lauren, not one grifter is a victim. they are the perpetrators and should get what they promote. and they will.
As a parent, I support the choice of any who choose to not raise children. It's a ridiculous amount of responsibility to take on, and children are people, deserving of their own autonomy and a chance to form their own world view.
About an hour in and.... ah yes, the magical quality of dating a dude that suddenly makes xou straight. Weird that i still have the hots for charlize theron and ruby rose, despite having been in a relationship with a straight man for almost 3 years. Its almost as if who Im dating doesnt actually impact who i find hot
Also, not wanting to have kids because you don’t want to sacrifice your money or possessions is also perfectly fine. The fact of the matter is that people who don’t want kids for any reason shouldn’t be forced to have kids. Love your content Rachel! Your intelligence is refreshing
Everyone told my partner and me that Marriage changes things. It did not. And that makes me happy. I love our relationship and am glad that our experience, time and efforts affect our relationship, not a legal agreement and a party.
I love your videos, the points you make, your personal story, and your informed insights. I’m a doula and work with low income families for free because they can’t afford representation in hospitals. YOU are a success story, and remind me how much my ancestors fought for feminism, to give me the opportunity to choose not to marry, have kids, and have a roof over my head without suffering from abuse or poverty. You help to remind us how much we are fighting and standing for, and how people in power are trying to take that away. Keep your voice strong, many people don’t understand the history or impact of what feminism really is.
Your bit about ow you and your partner choose to be with eachother every day because there's nothing forcing you to be there was really lovely. I paused the video and send a message to my partner telling them how wonderful it is to be a part of their life =) Alright, back to regressive conservatism...
On the other side of that, marriage is more than just a commitment to remain in a relationship. It’s a means of deep, legalistic integration (I was gonna say “entanglement,” but I feel like that’s got a negative connotation) of two people’s lives. All financial assets acquired during a marriage become mutually owned between spouses, unless otherwise legally agreed upon. If one spouse dies, there are laws about inheritance in absence of a will. In some countries, any children born to married women are assumed to be their husbands’ unless paternity is specifically contested. In many instances, you can extend benefits to your spouse and stepchildren, but not a bf/gf or their kids (such as in the US military, with health insurance.) In medical emergencies where one person is incapacitated, a spouse is the next-of-kin, and given medical power of attorney in the absence of a pre-appointed one, whereas an unmarried person’s NOK is generally a parent or other family member. Just a few examples. It’s more than just a commitment to remain together.
@@alexisoshea1692 yeah, a marriage is a contract that does make a big difference legally. And that's exactly why people need to make their own informed choices about whether they want that or not!
@@alexisoshea1692 Exactly! I once read this great quote "marriage isn't there to tell everyone how much you love each other, that's what a facebook status is for"
@@alexisoshea1692 oh sure! I'm not saying that there aren't any reasons to get married, I'm just saying that it's a lovely way to look at their relationship and it made me think of telling my partner that I love them, that's all!
I think the big difference is you aren't critiquing her so much as a human but her actual views. You're not going "if you believe x then you, as a human, are trash. Period." You go "hey this belief that this person spouts is really harmful because of x,y,z and if you believe it that belief could be harming you or those around you". I hope that makes sense.
I'm not a big fan of Miley's music but "Mother's Daughter" is probably one of my all time favorite songs/videos. It's sexy and powerful, it's so good. This segment made me randomly remember years ago when I had sex for the first time, I didn't experience the infamous "cherry pop." There was no pain, no blood. And instead of feeling relieved that it wasn't an agonizing time, I was worried he'd accuse me of lying about being a virgin. Thankfully he didn't, but it was still a rollercoaster of emotions within like a 20 minute window. And I wasn't even raised in a religious or "traditional" family, I can't imagine adding all the shameful layers of purity culture on top of that. Yikes. I'm thankful these conversations have been happening though. Whenever I talk about sex with my daughters, it's a more realistic and honest conversation.
What a massive, detailed and compassionate job of work you have done here Rachel, Lauren aside. this work inspired so much important information. This world needs more people like you.
The 'give birth for a purpose' thing really shows how these people have no meaning in their lives. Seriously, the idea of someone giving up helping hundreds of people to improve their lives for one or two babies just sounds morally wrong. Its like the trolly problem
It's not even a well-constructed trolley problem - it's a false dichotomy. People DO parent - genetically, gestationally, and/or as a caregiver - AND influence people beyond the family all the time. Yeah, we don't have infinite time and energy and there are allocations to make but it's certainly not some simple one or the other option. Furthermore, those parenting roles grade smoothly out into the broader community, like all the resources or time or inspiration we offer nieces, nephews, cousins.
@@yota8325 Of course it is. The problem usually lies in how it's pushed as something that absolutely has to be done. If that's not present and everyone can decide for themselves what gives them purpose, then we'd all be better off than we are now. My parents push me to have kids even tho I knew since elementary school that I didn't want to, and them not accepting my "no" responses makes our relationship bit toxic to say the least.
To be honest, I did find a good reason for marriage: a lot of countries do not recognise partnership. For instance in Vietnam, my partner is not recognised as someone I’m in relationship with (they are considered my friend only). It is absolutely stupid, but it is what it is. Great video as always!
Ever since I reformed and left the toxicity of the manosphere (thank you Rachel Oates and Feminist Cat Lady Spinster among others for showing me it's toxicity), I think not having kids for the sake of helping with Climate Change is a super noble thing to do. I'm not a particular fan of Miley Cyrus, but I applaud her for making a choice for herself to not have kids, especially if it is to help with Climate Change.
As a man in the same age group with the manosphere talkers (Rollo, Rich Cooper etc), after listening to these talkers, these talkers are almost exclusively obsessed about 1 thing: Advocating M40-F20 relationships. These talkers have little interest in asking 20 year old women if these women are really interested.
@@thomaslawrence6353 so many absolutely would love to "date" (read: abuse) 15-17 yr olds because they're young and naive and literally dont have the life experience to know any better
One topic that would be interesting to see you cover is the one regarding the accusations of grooming coming from conservatives against the LGBTQ community, specifically regarding the examples they like to use such as the publication "Thinking Sex" by Gayle Rubin and whether or not that text is as influential as some conservatives claim.
To be fair, PragerU is bottom of the barrel stuff, their videos are so patronising as if they are aimed at children, and their claims are paper-thin in how weak they are. I actually find it reassuring that so many Conservative personalities endorse it, it proves to me they endorse anything that supports their ideology, no matter how badly presented and poorly researched it is.
I don’t have kids because I was never in a place where I felt emotionally stable enough to be a parent, and I refuse to feel guilty or ashamed about it. My kids would have deserved my A game, and I knew I couldn’t provide it.
The biggest effects of having a marriage certificate are legal/administrative. There are elements that provide security and also elements that can cause issues. One positive is legal rights to visit patients in critical care situations where they can't give consent that can't be fought by biological family. Which is an issue for some.
Hi Rachel. I'm a very shy person, I'm not really one ro comment under anything. But I just really need to tell you that your videos have gotten me through 60 hour work weeks and not lose my mind. Your channel is so amazing, its introduced me to so many things, educated me with so many things, I don't think I can ever stop being grateful. And as someone who's first language isnt English, I have always had a bitter relationship with the language but I am just so mesmerized by your diction. You are so well spoken, you have given me inspiration on how to express myself better. You are a gorgeous gorgeous person, I wish you all the love and luck in the world 🩷
04:20 Lauren’s case is very similar to what people in abusive relationships go through. Many people tend to normalise abusive behaviour by saying, “they love me?” And “ if not them then who” and in many cases, “Maybe I am the one who has done something wrong”. I don’t know the exact psychological term for it, but it seems that Lauren is kind of in an abusive relationship with the ideology that she firmly believes in. She constantly verbalise such narratives so that she in her head, normalises, misogynistic behaviour.
Yess!! Thank you so much for another long video Rachel you are the best 😩 Edit : Watching girl defined flick their tongues around is honestly what i needed to kick off the new year
Hi Rachel! Would you consider doing a video on the motherhood penalty in the workforce? I feel like it’s something that is so prevalent and yet no one really knows or talks about it. I think you could do a great video on it ❤
I also want to add- when I studied this topic at uni, at that time I found stats that in the US, the wage gap between mothers and child free women was actually larger than the gap between women and men! Not sure if that stat still stands today, but yeah! This can also be another good reason for a person to be child free- mothers are taken less seriously in the workforce. If someone is career oriented and has goals to work their way up, having a child can significantly ruin those chances because companies will value and respect you less. On the contrary, fathers are actually taken MORE seriously in the workforce and respected higher than child free men!
@@Strawberrysoymilkk Omg i didn't know the term but i saw it happen in real life - a colleague who was really really (really!) good and everybody knew (she had previously worked in a very prestigious firm as and she did three times the work of normal workers) was told not to apply for a promotion "because she has kids". As if most of the men in the promoted position didn't have children themselves!!! It was shocking and eye-opening. She luckily got the position eventually but wtf.
@@Strawberrysoymilkk how is that not obvious ofcorse farthers are valued more in society than men without kids. We would go extinct if that wasn't the case. Bit you've also got to take into consideration that the extra a father might make is going towards the mother and his family so it's not as unbalanced as you think.
@@yota8325 I'd like to believe that but then I'm reminded of how often fathers try to avoid household chores and suddenly the balance is ruined. Very rarely only one partner is supporting the family financially and if both of them are working, both should also work on the home, which doesn't seem to be the case, unfortunately.
Great video, and I just wanted to throw in that circumcision is male genital mutilation and it’s mass popularity in America, and the social enforcements that it is “more sanitary” and such, make it so hard to make people realize what it really is. Many moms are pressured or not given a choice for their child. The majority of nerves are in the foreskin and removal of it massively affects one’s sensitivity. It being done by doctors makes people feel like it’s then okay. And of course it doesn’t compare to the way female genital mutilation is enacted, but Americans in particular need to be pushed to consider why they view one as unacceptable and another not only acceptable but preferred.
I'm assuming the reason why one is deemed unacceptable because the impact and the reasoning behind FGM are IMO a LOT worse. FGM's purpose is specifically to reduce ability to recieve pleasure, reduces function to an INCREDIBLE degree, and even causes reproductive harm. Its like slapping someone vs hitting them in the face with a baseball bat.
I mean if men properly washed themselves I don’t think the sanitation thing would be a concern. But considering that so many men won’t even wash their asscracks cause they think it’s gay, there’s no way those men would pull back that extra skin and clean under there cause that would be super gay, which could then lead to infections from all the built up dead skin/piss/sweat/other fluids. Of course some men do properly clean themselves, but that doesn’t seem to be the norm for men. From my perspective as a woman, foreskin doesn’t bother me on its own, but bad hygiene does. And so many men have awful hygiene in their nether regions.
Yes this absolutely needs to be discussed. I'd really like to hear opinions on it from people that consider it a part of their faith or just AMAB people in general, see how they feel about the topic
Happy new year, Rachel and Kyra! Here's to a year of love, treats, and snuggles for you two! Thanks for being a very well-researched, knowledgeable, eloquent voice for feminism. It's always refreshing to see someone cite sources that amount to more than "trust me, bro" or "well (insert religious text here) says."
Rachel, I think this video should be required watching in middle and high school. Thank you for this amazing video. Though I do watch you because I agree with 100% of everything you say, I learned so much from this video. Thank you again for this great, informative video.
has anyone else ever read the piece by a woman who was pressured into having an ultrasound at a crisis pregnancy center, but then they wouldn't give her underwear and pants back until she agreed to watch a graphic video of late term fetuses being taken apart piece by piece (something that happens only if the fetus is deceased and inducing birth to get it out isn't an option) with claims that the fetus could feel everything the whole time? it was so disgusting and i remember it every time i see a crisis pregnancy center
Amazing video as always! I'm still watching it, but - Rachel, you're my favourite RUclipsr and I just wanted to say how much I appreciate the hard work you put into making your videos ❤️
I grew up around a lot of religious conversation and while my parents aren’t like that but I grew up hearing around other family members that if you’re not a virgin you’re basically worthless. I lost my virginity later this year at 23 and I actually feel better about myself and my body and men are actually more interested in me now and it can open me up to more relationship opportunities. I made my sexual debut and I killed it and it was a positive experience for me and I own it and I’m not gonna feel guilty about it
You mentioning you were the first woman of your family to go to university made me realise my big sister was the first woman too (i second) to access higher education in our family... this is chilling a little bit... Thank you for articulating your thoughts so well. I will quote you next time someone criticizes feminism.
I agree on one thing she says in the beginning: feminism did "demonize" motherhood--because feminists believe in informed consent and once I learned honest, real statistics about what happens to women during and after pregnancy, I knew I wasnt going to take those risks and do myself that kind of harm. THANK YOU, feminism.
🥺 I felt that hard when you got emotional talking about DV Rachel, please take breaks when you need to! We so appreciate all the work you do ❤ sending you love 💕
The part about genital mutilation made me remember reading the autobiography of Waris Dirie. I had never cried while reading a book. I am crying again now, more than 20 years later. It is horrible that nothing seems to have changed in that regard.
idk if that was your dog snoring in the background in the clip of you explaining why virginity is a social construct, but whatever it is it's sooo calming to listen to
Happy new year, Rachel! I have just discovered you (by the end of 2023), and I am sooo grateful that I did. Your videos are like camomile tea for my soul. Thank you so much for your great and important work ❤️
I really hope more people will watch this...most people who watch Lauren's content probably aren't used to hearing arguments and studies supporting her claims and just dwell on her little jokes about SJWs and WOkE people. If they come here and see your approach to any topic maaaaybe they will start to understand that the world is not black and white and that all her privileged standpoints can be be easily debunked by someone who understands more than her neighborhood.
Rachel my goodness, this has to be one of the best videos you've done! so informative and comprehensive, I'm gonna have to watch it a few times through to absorb all the information in here. well done! your videos never disappoint 😊 and truly i hope the best for you going forward in your health journey
Great video! Full of great information but Rachel's videos always are. My husband and I love all the videos and often have interesting discussions after we watch them. Thanks for all your hard work!
Hi Rachel, great vid! I was wondering if you’d ever be interested in making a video on cooperation in nature, as sort of a refutation of claims that competition is the only natural way for humans to succeed? It would be cool to see a broad overview of different cooperative systems like mycelium networks, eusocial insect, endosymbionts etc as well as the history of the study of these things has lead to the slight paradigm shift towards valuing symbiosis over competitive exclusion (at least in my field).
fun fact about crisis pregnancy center (not fun at all)!! they ran our sex education program in my school county. i use "sex education" loosely because obviously it was just abstinence, but from 6-9th grade (or later if you didn't take a health class as a high school freshman/failed the class) cpc "taught" us the same things over and over again. in my ninth grade health class, they even showed upsetting/disturbing pictures of "consequences" of stds which were "only transmittable through sex-before-marriage." so. yeah theyre bs. i think one of their solutions to dealing with a teenager who had an std was?? to pray?? unsure if i'm remembering that correctly but
Absolutely agree that marriage after living together doesn’t change things most of the time. So many of my coworkers ask how marriage is going and I don’t know how to answer lol. Like my health insurance is better and my taxes are cheaper I guess 🤷🏻♀️
Howdy Rachel, just want to leave a comment, (I'm early enough for you to probably see it). I think I found your channel in 2018, and purposefully searched for your channel again a few years ago because I remebered how much I liked your content. I was in a rough phase of horrible thoughts and was deep in the propaganda of the alt-right pipeline. I want to say how happy I am that you are continuing to make videos about feminism and deconstructing harmful gender roles from purity culture. Your channel has been instrumental and uplifting in my deconstruction of my previously held beliefs. Thanks girl 💃
Your hair is so fly in this video, Rachel. I'd love to know by what method you made those incredible curls, if you wouldn't mind sharing, please! You've got a beautiful mind, too, and changed the direction of my life at a time when I was struggling last year. I found out recently that I'm autistic, at age 39, and hadn't known that. I had an incorrect idea of how someone w/ autism presents, and the wheels began turning for me. So much has come together in retrospect about my life, and I've realized parts of me I saw as 'needing fixing' don't need fixing at all, and make perfect sense.
I love listening to you talking about many different things and I think one of the reasons why is in the beginning of your video. We have similar views of the world, but you can put those into words in the way that is beautifully thought provoking to me. And I really appreciate that! I often find myself closing off on other peoples arguments, but your way of discussing many different points makes me want to apply some of that in my own discussions. Awesome work. And thank you so much!
And the cycles of family abuse, it’s so sad and so scary. To me this is the true power of feminism, that we can now work and make our own ways and not depend on a man to value us as a virgin, as eye candy, etc.
Thank you for making this video. Lauren sent me down a brief conservative rabbit hole in my teens (fortunately I never went deeper than Blair White). I can’t watch videos like this anymore because it makes me depressed hearing about the warped ways some people see the world, but these are the sort of videos that got me out of that problematic side of RUclips. So I wanted to at least throw some engagement into the algorithm ❤
I tried dating with a purpose in my early 20s and it was a disaster. Now I’m just Burnt out turning 24 and don’t know where to go or what to do. I just want to have someone who chooses me and I choose them equally and there’s a mutual attraction as well as shared values
Don’t worry, 24 is still very young, you don’t need to give up forever! It’s absolutely ok to take a date from dating for a while and focus on yourself and if you happen to meet someone in that time, at least you’ll be prepared for how to figure out if you’re right together when you do. But mostly just look after yourself, you got this
I can definitely relate to Rachel when it comes to the childfree by choice aspect. It saves me so much time and effort when we ask our dates early on whether they want kids or not! This is something that we cannot/should not try to change the others. It's all about our own core values. Also, I personally do not want marriage and thank you Rachel for speaking to my heart as I wholeheartedly agree that it makes the relationship even more special because me and partner CHOOSE to be together even without that legally binding certificate!
I can't believe, that I watched channels like Lauren a few years ago. Back then I also didn't understand what terms like "social construct" mean. I'm proud to say, that now I do and I've grown to understand so many other things, that people like Lauren choose to stay ignorant about.
2:00:02 "No, of course people don't have children for their labour! But if you don't have children, you won't have people who are tasked with looking after you in your old age." ~ Lauren, apparently What a good choice of final clip to include. I'm glad that she shows such openness to criticism, which is presumably why she is so easily able to explain the positions held by people who disagree with her. (sarcasm) Thanks for the hard work on such a draining topic. Chen doesn't appear to put in the research for her videos, but you clearly have put in so much work into yours
Saying that people who have had sex are different than people who haven’t and providing no evidence is also like saying that people who have long hair are entirely different than people who have short hair. Like…
unrelated to the video because I haven't finished it yet but I just wanted to say that this makeup & hair combo looks absolutely gorgeous on you, you look ethereal!
For all the terrible histories of gynecology and so many medications, I'd not want to live without access to the pill. I don't even have any sex, but taking the pill to stop my periods has been amazing for my mental health. And mine are not even that debilitating, it's mainly the hormone changes affecting me badly. Good luck with the coil! The one good thing about Lauren I'll say is that I like some of her backgrounds. Her opinions are... not as nice.
Lauren is one of the most irritating and grating reactionaries I have ever seen. She is incredibly bland and hasn’t a single original thought in her head.
@@sumatrannoseven worse. She’s a self hating wasian who makes her racial identity crisis everyone else’s problem (and by everyone else I mean non white people). Only bringing up her Asian side to deflect criticism of her racism. This is coming from a Lasian who had my struggles with my identity as well but I eventually outgrew the need for white approval.
A part of why i dont want kids is because i helped my mother take care of her parents when they had dementia and i want to be ready and financially able to care for my mother if that happens to her. I refuse to put her in a home. She didnt do it to her parents and i wont do it to mine. Not to say i couldnt have kids and take care of her, but with the economy i dont want to risk being so financially burdened that either my mother or my children would suffer.
0:00 Who Is Lauren Chen?
9:38 Lauren vs Miley Cyrus
21:55 Feminist Art
26:32 A Worldwide Problem
34:46 What Is a Social Construct?
42:34 Won’t Someone Think of the Children!
46:14 Lauren Doesn’t Know What A Social Construct Is
54:37 Lauren’s Secret Feminist Side Is Showing…
1:03:31 Bi and Pan Erasure Is Not OK
1:06:07 Lauren Loves Marriage
1:28:24 Lauren Doesn’t Know What Feminism Is
1:36:42 Feminism Is Not Anti-Family
1:42:32 Lauren Doesn’t Understand Working Class Struggles
1:59:58 The History of Women’s Reproductive Health
2:10:35 The Truth About Crisis Pregnancy Centres
2:22:56 I’m Sure Lauren Loves Criticism
@@The-Mask021notice I block a lot of misogynists and I won’t apologise for that.
Capitalism actually saves from Nature. But did we become a successful species for millions of years before we invented capitalism. Maybe home water Birth
So your saying women need feminism to Pass the blame on Their problems many their own choices
@@DustLion No, women need feminism to get even just basic human rights in a patriarchal society with capitalism as the global economic ssystem that are simply rewarded to boys (and therefore future men) by a matter of birthright and with no questions asked and no work necessery for males to earn them through merit.
@@RachelOates
I’m grateful you do that. ❤️
I've said it before and I'll say it again. Everyone who doesn't have kids because they "Just don't want any" is doing more for child welfare than every emotionally distant, neglectful parent out there.
All the shit your ancestors went though and these people feel so entitled and so self important to end their bloodline. 😅😅😅🤡🌎
Lauren Chen is wrong and stupid but not any more than you.
Believe it or not my emotionally distant neglectful abusive parents did way more for me than “just not having me”. Life finds a way and parents suck, doesn’t mean the kids will suck.
Rachel, I’ve been watching your videos since I was 16 (I’m 21 now) and want to say- thank you so much for your videos. I hope this doesn’t sound weird but you’re kind of like a parasocial older sister to me because your content is educational and has taught me very useful things as a woman I would not have otherwise known. Your videos about feminism and women’s issues have really helped me deconstruct much of the shame I have regarding sex and sexuality. I also love how queer-friendly your content is and makes me as a bisexual (and possibly ace?) person feel accepted. Love your channel and what you do
Thank you!!! :)
Yess I felt that!!! I would probably never have been able to leave my abusive relationship had i not begun watching specifically Rachel. Her content is so empowering. You go girl🥺❤️
Same here , I was deep in the cult of Christianity at the time and her videos really helped me to come back to myself and repair the damage that my abusive home life and church had done to me as a queer person :,) so thankful for this channel
That's such a great comment. I'm almost a generation older than you (soon 40) and I'm so happy to see young creators like Rachel positively affecting young women!
Same here!! I’ve been watching Rachel for about 3 years since I was 18 and her breakdowns of feminism and girl defined and fundamentalism really really helped me in my deconstruction from a religion that was a bit of a cult. Rachel, I love how kind you are and compassionate and I for one really appreciate the love you put into your videos💜
A Lauren Chen video that's 2 hours long? Great start to the new year! 🎉
Edit: Oh hey, I'm in this! Thank you for the shout out! 😊
❤️❤️❤️❤️
@@RachelOates You didn't know about Lauren until Kit uploaded that video a month ago??? I watched Lauren for years. Whatever you think of Lauren's politics, you must admit that her beauty is hypnotic 💫
started to watch the video then saw your comment and had to do a double take when you said that it was two hours lmao
I had a jumpscare seeing your comment previewed before opening the comments section because I mistook the tiny view of your icon for Lauren Chen
@@cityman2312SIIIIIIIIIIIMP
It made my heart so happy that you mentioned taking care of aging relatives, instead of having kids. I’m 29 with no kids and I have taken care of my grandma and papa the last two years. (My papa passed away a week ago, on 12/28 :,( but I’m still taking care of grandma. It has made my heart so full, and I knew it was my purpose. I do want to have kids in the future, but I always thought “doesn’t it make sense to take care of the people who are already here, rather than create more people who need to be taken care of?” I wouldn’t have been able to take care of them if I would have gotten married and had kids young, like I always thought I would.
I’m sorry for your loss. It’s difficult caring for an ill parent/family, but it’s a comfort to help care for them at the same time.
Who will take care of you when you're old?
I grew up in a conservative Christian home and adopted a lot of conservative attitudes and beliefs by default. I had zero interest in feminism, saying identical things that these women did. But I learned the hard way how wrong I was.
This whole line of thinking reminds me of people who pushed back against vaccines and social distancing during the early pandemoniumic. I saw a health official say the hard part of doing what we had to do was that reducing the spread would make people think it was all unnecessary. Mild cases would give people the idea that the risk was overstated. But if the death and illness rate is reduced, it’s proof that what we did worked.
These women are living the benefits of feminism and telling feminists their work and beliefs are pointless. They may go through life blissfully unaware but I hope they learn, and I don’t even wish them the hard ways of learning though it’s more likely than not it will happen.
You are so right! I never thought about it that way.. 👏
you are ignoring a lot of things...if i explained exactly what happened during co-vidit clearly my comment will probably disappear. Also in west women would have gained their rights even without feminism?
News flash - they are living the benefits of capitalism honey… feminists had nothing to do except harp for abortion over the past century
It’s always funny to me when these anti feminist types like Lauren blame feminism for the results of capitalism.
When more qualitian man can't get job and as any value Rachel hers say quota Systems male homelessness do to child support and alimony is because of feminism.
And new Jersey wasn't trying to help the homeless just that More Women getting more money being more liable for alimony so the state ended life time alimony and 2 years later became number1 in reducing chronic homeless so it seems the other way around blaming capitalism for problems caused by feminism. Rachel herself in this says women need feminism to Pass the blame for all problems especially those caused by their own choices
Feminism is a capitalist ideology is it not? I mean Gloria Steinem was a CIA who snitched out communist students for the state department.
And without feminism, she wouldn't have her job.
yup
Or ignore the many rights both legally and socially they have now because of feminism.
'' There are layers to this body
Primal sex and primal shame
They told me I should cover it
So I went the other way
I was tryin' to own my power
Still I'm tryin' to work it out
And at least it gives the papers somethin' they can write about"'
This is from a Miley Cyrus song , it stuck with me since the first time I listened to it. I think every women can relate at some level, it is a very complicated and most of the times a traumatic journey to become a woman in a patriarchal society. And I cant imagine how f up it must be in an industry, controlled by men .
Virginity testing is still a thing in Romania. My godmother took her daughter to get examined when she was 18. Even my religious mother thought it was horrible. I can't imagine having to interact with my mother after if she ever did that. I think it's officially illegal now, but there are doctors that still offer this examination. It really higglights for me how poor the education doctors receive in my country is
It happens in America too.
@@lizzybeary the United States also has notoriously poor Sex education. It’s definitely most prevalent in nations with poor Sex ed and/or a high prevalence of religiosity.
They have clinics that exist to "restore" the hymen
(Im speaking usa and canada)
It's utter BS!
The hymen ISNT a proof of anything.
Some girls have none.
Some break it during sport, or falling.
Some have a thick one.
Etc.
It's F disgusting.
@@lizzybeary like @melsoft121 said, we're both religious countries with poor sex education. Sad, but not unexpected. Hopefully we all get rid of this stupid practice as soon as we can
Poorly educated and money-hungry. no doubt some of these doctors know what they're doing is BS but seeing that it's illegal some ppl might pay a pretty penny to circumvent the law.
Marriage is a big boost to my life because im disabled. Marrying my husband lets me be on his insurance, lets us both get cheaper college, lets me easily allow him into doctors appointments and hospital rooms. People don't question "my husband" like they do "my boyfriend" But thats just for me. The vast majority of people don't need to worry about that.
Amazingly marriage is a personal decision and not for everyone. Its up to each couple to decide whats best for their personal circumstances, some people might benefit a lot from marriage, some might not.
ALSO! As I tell everyone: My husband and I have experienced NO DIFFERENCE from dating to engaged to marriage.
This is a great point. My husband and I do experience a lot of differences now that we're married, but that's mostly due to the US healthcare system being a dumpster fire as opposed to us actually feeling differently.
Thank you for contextualizing hateful content with history and research. It is so helpful to put words to why messages like Lauren’s hurt in such a personal way. Misogyny comes from ugly history and leads to real harm today. I so appreciate that your videos stand on their own in this way.
I just rediscovered your channel and i want to say that your discussion of virginity, relationships ect. made me feel included and acknowledged. I'm ace and demiromantic and very often discussions around these topics exclude or misrepresent the ace community. So i just want to say thanks and I'll be subscribing to your channel.
Demiromantic? What, does that you want a relationship but without a sexual component?
@warlordofbritannia demisexual typically is someone won't find any sexual attraction to someone until they've formed a very strong intimate emotional bond. Essentially having to establish a relationship of some kind before sexual or romantic feeling can develop.
@@warlordofbritannia I'm asexual which means I'm not sexually attracted to anyone. Demiromantic means that I experience romantic attraction after I've formed a close bond to someone.
@@anonymousperson2839I'm asexual but I don't see how demisexual is any different to the "norm" in the sense that most people wouldn't be romantically or sexually attracted to someone they don't really know? Like most people I've spoken to who aren't on the ace spectrum/LGBTQIA+ community feel like that. Most people aren't into hookups etc.
@@fawn2911 Some people are able to feel sexually or romantically attracted to people they barely know/have not known for a long time. Some people need more time before they can physically start experiencing these emotions.
I found Lauren's comments of bisexuality and pansexuality extremely myopic and it still carries the old stereotype of "you aren't bi/pan, if you're with a guy".
I'm still going to be a bisexual women if I'm dating a guy or a woman. I find the soul of a person beautiful, and I don't need my relationships to validate my sexual/romantic identity.
I'll never get married, I don't want to make the mistake of marrying the wrong person and then going through the stress of finding that I'm only doing it for the sake of it. I have the autonomy over my own life to make these decisions, I can date and stay in a relationship for a long-term relationship without the need of wanting to get married, a piece of paper doesn't determine love for that person.
Some people don't want to get married for many reasons:
Fear of commitment
It's just a pain in the ass to plan the wedding.
@ville__ is being straight a choice as well or are you also gonna spam misinformation all over this comment section as well?
@@zeebirdVille is a notorious troll across a lot of RUclips who primarily targets the comments section of women and LGBTQ+ content creators. They keep getting banned from the platform and keep coming back with new usernames. They just a sad little troll with nothing better to do so please don’t take them seriously or give them any attention.
@@zeebirdummm no. Being straight is not a choice. It is just what you are or are not. I don't choose who I am attracted to, my brain just does that. You don't really choose what your favorite color is your brain just does that. You don't really choose what your favorite song is your brain just does that
@@RachelOatesaka, a dingus
@@UlexiteTVStoneLexiteZeebird wasn't saying that being straight is a choice!! They were replying to a now-deleted comment which I'm guessing said being lgbtq+ is a choice and we're using the straight question to counter that
I had a big argument with one of my parent's friends because she was saying she's never been discriminated against and that just doesn't happen now. I've literally had a manager say in a job interview that I didn't get a job because he didn't like working with women and when i told her that she told me it was my fault I didn't sue him. Would've loved to, but it was just me he said it to, so it was my word against his. I'm truly not sure how all these women are making it to adulthood without experiencing any sexism. It blows my mind.
She’s probably blind to what sexism looks like. Because it can be subtle
It’s because your friends not obsessed with identifying themselves as a victim. You should try it some time, it’s quite freeing tbh.
I actually think most women and minorities who make these claims tend to limit their definition to 'not been physically assaulted', or sometimes they have been gaslit into believing it. Conversely I don't know anyone who is part of a minority who hasn't experienced discrimination on some level, and I've never known a woman who hasn't confided with me about misogyny they've experienced. Even I've experienced prejudice, I'm a white, cis-het man and I've experienced classicism. Discrimination is so prevalent it's everywhere in our society, which is why it's so important to teach people about systemic discrimination.
@@angelhellokitti I'm choosing to read your comment in good faith and in that sense, I see where you're coming from (I have a friend who's determined to assume that every time someone treats her in a way she dislikes, it's because she's a young woman or a person of our nationality. I've witnessed situations where she claimed that, meanwhile I could see that it's not what happened). On the other hand, the OP here said that she didn't get a job and the manager openly said it's because HE DOESN'T LIKE WORKING WITH WOMEN. If that's not literally gender discrimination (which makes her a victim of sexism), then I don't know what is. The manager even felt so comfortable about his views that he didn't bother coming up with a fake reason. [edited for clarity]
@@AW-uv3cb I’m not reading that
i used to follow her reaaaallly long time ago like in my anti SJW phase when Lauren had only 2=3 videos on her channel and was called Roaming Millenial. i swear she wasnt this insane
i have the same memories i thought i was going crazy
Same. I slowly stopped watching her videos because her content just kept getting more ridiculous. I found myself eye rolling so often, I thought, why do I still watch this crap lol. In the beginning I remember her being fairly reasonable in her criticism towards feminism and sjw stuff. But somehow shes gone to full blown right wing pandering mode.
I think it's a very easy route to go: from moderate and reasonable criticism of something to leaning full-on into bashing it. She must have gotten a lot of positive feedback from the right side of the political spectrum and decided that hey, if that's what people like, I'll give them more of it. First step onto a slippery slope, very hard to avoid unless you're very clear and honest with yourself on what your views actually are and are not.
@@AW-uv3cbThe alt right pipeline. Its a widely discussed topic
@@SaigesArstgo1031 yeah but it remains weird when you see it happening
I could be very wrong about Miley Cyrus but if I’m not mistaken, there actually were “stunts” that she pulled some time ago to be scandalous. But my understanding is that it was a strategic thing to get the conservatives who owned her brand to cut ties with her and set her free. Like there was that whole Robin Thicke twerking thing and whatever else. Then once her ploy worked, she seemed totally normal and professional (because she actually always WAS; she just had to do what she had to do)
@@ninawth whoah, hey, slow down! I’m not stating this as a fact. It’s just something plausible I heard that I didn’t fact check because I don’t care enough about the topic.
This makes sense, I also believe that it was because once a Disney child tries to leave and do more “adult” things when it comes to acting and singing, Disney kind of follows them around and people put this sort of expectation of them to act like a Disney kid still.
“Living together and marriage have little in common.”
That’s such a funny statement to me. I was living with my partner for two years before we married and I honestly forget sometimes that we’re married. Nothing’s really changed for us because we were already acting like a committed couple beforehand and everyone in our lives treated us as such. Unfortunately, the United States treats domestic partners differently from married couples so we had to work within those systems.
Thank you for this video. It’s possibly one of the most concise arguments against anti-feminism. With Lauren, it really comes down to her not recognizing her privilege and saying that no one needs feminism because she doesn’t need it. She can’t examine that people have lived differently than she has.
"Identifies as a Christian Nationalist": Horrifying in itself.
This is so much the sickness of "the world is small and inflexible; everyone is, or should be, just like me; anything else is bad / evil / delusional". It's so sad.
Agreed as a Christian absolutely. I don't want a government regulating my beliefs and that's what happens when a religion is nationalised.
Literally unconstitutional and exactly what the Founding Fathers specifically did not want to ever happen, but ok Lauren.
@@CharlieApples how dare u, Lauren is very american in value, mood, vibe, soul, and energy! /joking, obviously
it goes so hard in a way that's so funny, tbh 😭
I hate to disagree with you but there is a test for virginity. You need to find 2 snails, whisper the name of the person you want to test to their ears, bring them the nearest botanic garden during full moon, play them a song by Berry White, go back home and return during the next full moon and if you can still find them and they've made baby snails then the person isn't a virgin
But seriously, ❤ your content. Thank you ❤
Lolz
Avocado toast: £5, once per month.
Rent: £1320 per month.
Having a child: £250,000.
Lauren, shut the hell up about the toast. I'd have to have given it up before Judaism was invented to have saved up enough to raise a child.
And having kids isnt just costing financially....
Nope. So much more.
@@FocusedFighter777 yep, I love children but they will push you to your breaking point and beyond, you need to be so strong and patient and truly love that child with every fiber of your being
I can't believe she used that as a legitimate talking point. I knew avocado toast has often been used to derisively refer to Millennials being...I don't know, Millennials...but I didn't think anyone actually believed that that one food, which not everyone even likes, is a major cause of financial hardship for young people, and if they just gave it up they'd be fine.
Also, the price of avocados varies depending on where you live. If you happen to live in a region that produces avocados (such as California), they can actually be relatively cheap. And even in regions where avocados need to be shipped to, they're not THAT much more expensive that most of the other "standard" produce you find at the grocery store. They cost more than an apple, sure, but they're far from being a luxury good.
I really don’t understand how avocado toast is considered to be some kind of luxury food. I think one person said this and now it gets repeated with absolutely no research. Where I live, avocados are like $1.50.
I did not know who Lauren Chen was, but 15 sec into this video and when she opened her mouth, i was like, OH DAMN, she's gonna be those types of insufferable characters to deal with. Rachel, i don't know how you keep your sanity together researching these types of individuals, but you're a better person than i am
All the best luck with getting diagnosed and treated properly as soon as possible. I hope You're not overworking Yourself too much with all this great content - so many long videos lately and I've enjoyed every single one :))
I was raised in a strict catholic household with lots of harmful beliefs and hearing You debunking them is so informative and healing. Thank You!
Also, I wish we as women would finally stop feeling the need to apologize for being emotional, because there's literally nothing wrong with it.
Looking forward to the next upload
The part about how birth control can provide not only sexual freedom but also freedom from painful periods really hit hard for me. I have the Mirena IUD, and it is honestly one of the best things I've ever done. Even though it was extremely painful to have it put in (which is a whole other issue having to do with sexism in medicine), it still has made my life so much better. No more trying to remember to take a pill every day, no more 7 day long periods with extreme cramping, mood swings, and hormonal acne. It truly is so freeing and I just have to say I fucking love feminism.
The pain was sexist?
@VColossalV No, the fact that they don't provide anesthetic for a really painful procedure like that is. It was absolutely the most pain I've ever experienced, with extreme cramping for weeks after, and it's absolutely bonkers that pain relief isn't provided.
@@kyliewalker1927 i don't know if that's a sexism issue, unless I suppose that particular person wants women to suffer more for some reason.
@@VColossalV It's rare to give pain relief for it. That's why it's a sexism issue. The pain that women experience isn't taken seriously. It's not just my gyno
@@kyliewalker1927 That doesn't need to be a sexism issue, in fact I don't even know how you could possibly determine that to be a sexism issue. Be careful when calling things sexist, because it's doing that which gave an entire counter culture movement ammunition to spread their agenda. We don't need to go into other examples of people using the term "sexism" or "racism" a little too liberally. We shouldn't be calling people who wear a sombrero or other items of clothing racist because they're culturally appropriating, same thing. By going to extremes we create extremes.
30:07 I love, love, love when you quote research and provide sources! I used to work in refugee resettlement and getting clients with FGC was very common. So common, we attended mandatory training that was trauma-informed in order to provide appropriate care/services to people who had experienced this. While I dont disagree this is a horrific practice, I have generally been taught to use the term Female Genital Cutting instead of mutilation to remove stigma from the survivor of this practice who may be seeking care (both mentally and physically) in a country that does not practice FGC. Lots of these people come seeking gynecology care and face shame for their ignorance of health information that is very common for others. Thank you so, so much for discussing this topic in hopes of removing barriers to mental and physical health for people with vulvas/uterus/etc ❤
Another interesting thought on the "have I ever been oppressed?" Question. If you asked me that a year ago, I would have said I never faced oppression and never was denied opportunities because of my gender. Now that I've started reconsidering things, I can see how taking into account subtle changes actually drastically changes my answer.
I have felt oppressed before, because I have been asked to monitor my clothing choices for the sake of the cultural expectation of women and men in my life. I have never been denied opportunities that I can think of, but I have been discouraged from them and given less support than my male counterparts, the opportunities I have had in religious settings have been limited and devalued because of my gender, and I have been told by others, even if they could not enforce it, that I was not allowed to make certain desisions because of my gender.
And I think it lends an interesting point. Some of feminism is education. I'm sure a good many women didn't feel oppressed by not having the right to get a job or to vote, because it never even occured to them that it was oppressive. I am a Cis White Woman who grew up sharing the religion and worldview of the majority in the culture I was raised in. Without considering nuance, my life seemed just fine, so it didn't occur to me until I was exposed to different worldviews how much I was actually being oppressed.
13:20 I'm also childfree by choice. For many reasons, like not wanting kids, not wanting to be pregnant and GIVE BIRTH. But the environment is also a factor
Ditto. I absolutely do not want to give birth or be pregnant but I also just don't want kids.
Must be so painful for ya lonely cat ladies to see mothers living meaningful lives and that'll have their kids and grandkids keeping them company in old age 😢... Keep selling your lies to the young
@@mikefernandes3959 Yep, I'm a happy and content cat mom 😻🫶 I do not need to procreate
I accidentally found one of those clinics when i was in my early 20's. They were supposed to offer free pregnancy tests. I couldn't get the test without sitting thru them telling me about the dangers of abortions. I didn't say shit about an abortion. There was only one women in the building and she was very pushy about telling me about the pain i would go thru. She wouldn't listen about just getting a blood test. Left and went to a queer youth clinic. They called a dr in to give me a test. When i told him i was scared because i couldn't afford a child he helped find a clinic that was safe.
Omgggg thank you Rachel for this video!! I remember way back in the day, when I was a liberal, I was actually sold for a bit on Lauren Chen's shenanigans. Back when she was called "Roaming millenial". She's got a lot of bad views, so I'm always surprised as to how little she's criticized!
I used to follow her around the roaming millennial time too and found her really conflicting because she goes against her own interests so often and doesn't realise it
Same, I used to appreciate her nuanced perspective but then eventually she just started pandering and said something kinda racist and even said she'd give up her right to vote as a woman bc it would benefit conservatives 😬
@@meegy2I learned this lesson about nuance the hard way. I don’t mind hearing nuanced takes on social issues as long as the person’s views are grounded in human decency. I hesitate to say progressive because progressives can be 💩 people too but many people who don’t identify as progressive do have values that can be considered progressive (anti racism, gender equality, income equality, etc).
I used to watch her during my edgy anti feminist phase. Glad I got out of that one. Can't wait to hear you unpack her content while I work on knitting the blanket I'm making
knitting >>> being edgy
Shoe0nhead still makes good stuff.
Ooo what color is the blanket?? :)
@@alim.9801 black and red! I found super cozy yarn so I'm excited
@@VColossalV shoe makes good content in the sense that she provides funny shit to laugh at. can't take her seriously after years of proudly waving her relationship with armored skeptic + admitting to literally dickworshiping him, only for him to break up w her on her 30th birthday. the joke write themselves 💀 i don't feel bad for her and nobody should take her opinions seriously
I feel you're being extremely charitable towards Lauren by saying she's a victim. She's not someone who's been living in isolation and poverty with limited access to information to educate herself, she's had all those opportunities and still chose this path. She's no more a victim than Dave Rubin or Milo Yiannopolous.
I suppose a victim in the sense that even with all this access to opportunities their dignity is so non existent that they are willing to be token mouthpieces for people who hate them
@@alyssapinon9670just because she’s a woman doesn’t make her a victim. such people are called grifters. those who see information but wish to ignore it to pander to certain audiences to make money off of them.
@@umustwin She’s a victim, because she has been harmed by the very beliefs and content she espouses and produces. Just because she became a victim by identifying with those who harmed her does not make her any less of a victim or undeserving of empathy. I don’t think any victims should be blamed for becoming a victim, it doesn’t matter who the victim is, the nuance is important to distinguish.
@@MetastaticMaladies extremely retarded take. face-eating leopards meme explains everything succinctly. but i guess in the west it is better to victimize yourself/someone to absolve oneself from responsibility. ‘the nuance’ is that not pearl, not andrew tate, not lauren, not one grifter is a victim. they are the perpetrators and should get what they promote. and they will.
She is a victim bec. she was personally physically and/or emotionally harmed by one or several right-wing man.
As a parent, I support the choice of any who choose to not raise children. It's a ridiculous amount of responsibility to take on, and children are people, deserving of their own autonomy and a chance to form their own world view.
About an hour in and.... ah yes, the magical quality of dating a dude that suddenly makes xou straight. Weird that i still have the hots for charlize theron and ruby rose, despite having been in a relationship with a straight man for almost 3 years. Its almost as if who Im dating doesnt actually impact who i find hot
Also, not wanting to have kids because you don’t want to sacrifice your money or possessions is also perfectly fine. The fact of the matter is that people who don’t want kids for any reason shouldn’t be forced to have kids. Love your content Rachel! Your intelligence is refreshing
Everyone told my partner and me that Marriage changes things. It did not. And that makes me happy. I love our relationship and am glad that our experience, time and efforts affect our relationship, not a legal agreement and a party.
I love your videos, the points you make, your personal story, and your informed insights. I’m a doula and work with low income families for free because they can’t afford representation in hospitals.
YOU are a success story, and remind me how much my ancestors fought for feminism, to give me the opportunity to choose not to marry, have kids, and have a roof over my head without suffering from abuse or poverty. You help to remind us how much we are fighting and standing for, and how people in power are trying to take that away. Keep your voice strong, many people don’t understand the history or impact of what feminism really is.
Your bit about ow you and your partner choose to be with eachother every day because there's nothing forcing you to be there was really lovely. I paused the video and send a message to my partner telling them how wonderful it is to be a part of their life =)
Alright, back to regressive conservatism...
On the other side of that, marriage is more than just a commitment to remain in a relationship. It’s a means of deep, legalistic integration (I was gonna say “entanglement,” but I feel like that’s got a negative connotation) of two people’s lives. All financial assets acquired during a marriage become mutually owned between spouses, unless otherwise legally agreed upon. If one spouse dies, there are laws about inheritance in absence of a will. In some countries, any children born to married women are assumed to be their husbands’ unless paternity is specifically contested. In many instances, you can extend benefits to your spouse and stepchildren, but not a bf/gf or their kids (such as in the US military, with health insurance.) In medical emergencies where one person is incapacitated, a spouse is the next-of-kin, and given medical power of attorney in the absence of a pre-appointed one, whereas an unmarried person’s NOK is generally a parent or other family member.
Just a few examples. It’s more than just a commitment to remain together.
@@alexisoshea1692 yeah, a marriage is a contract that does make a big difference legally. And that's exactly why people need to make their own informed choices about whether they want that or not!
@@silky9850 absolutely. I feel like so many people don’t understand what all it entails before they go and get married.
@@alexisoshea1692 Exactly! I once read this great quote "marriage isn't there to tell everyone how much you love each other, that's what a facebook status is for"
@@alexisoshea1692 oh sure! I'm not saying that there aren't any reasons to get married, I'm just saying that it's a lovely way to look at their relationship and it made me think of telling my partner that I love them, that's all!
I think the big difference is you aren't critiquing her so much as a human but her actual views. You're not going "if you believe x then you, as a human, are trash. Period." You go "hey this belief that this person spouts is really harmful because of x,y,z and if you believe it that belief could be harming you or those around you". I hope that makes sense.
I'm not a big fan of Miley's music but "Mother's Daughter" is probably one of my all time favorite songs/videos. It's sexy and powerful, it's so good. This segment made me randomly remember years ago when I had sex for the first time, I didn't experience the infamous "cherry pop." There was no pain, no blood. And instead of feeling relieved that it wasn't an agonizing time, I was worried he'd accuse me of lying about being a virgin. Thankfully he didn't, but it was still a rollercoaster of emotions within like a 20 minute window. And I wasn't even raised in a religious or "traditional" family, I can't imagine adding all the shameful layers of purity culture on top of that. Yikes.
I'm thankful these conversations have been happening though. Whenever I talk about sex with my daughters, it's a more realistic and honest conversation.
I think I was a slightly happier person before reading the words "cherry pop" 🤮
I want to acknowledge the incredible thought and effort you put into getting this information out and in a consumable size. These stories matter!
What a massive, detailed and compassionate job of work you have done here Rachel, Lauren aside. this work inspired so much important information. This world needs more people like you.
The 'give birth for a purpose' thing really shows how these people have no meaning in their lives. Seriously, the idea of someone giving up helping hundreds of people to improve their lives for one or two babies just sounds morally wrong. Its like the trolly problem
It's not even a well-constructed trolley problem - it's a false dichotomy. People DO parent - genetically, gestationally, and/or as a caregiver - AND influence people beyond the family all the time. Yeah, we don't have infinite time and energy and there are allocations to make but it's certainly not some simple one or the other option. Furthermore, those parenting roles grade smoothly out into the broader community, like all the resources or time or inspiration we offer nieces, nephews, cousins.
Wanting to have kids is still a valid purpose to have in life tho
@@yota8325 Of course it is. The problem usually lies in how it's pushed as something that absolutely has to be done. If that's not present and everyone can decide for themselves what gives them purpose, then we'd all be better off than we are now. My parents push me to have kids even tho I knew since elementary school that I didn't want to, and them not accepting my "no" responses makes our relationship bit toxic to say the least.
To be honest, I did find a good reason for marriage: a lot of countries do not recognise partnership. For instance in Vietnam, my partner is not recognised as someone I’m in relationship with (they are considered my friend only). It is absolutely stupid, but it is what it is.
Great video as always!
I'm such a failure of a childfree woman; I don't even like travelling or avocados 😭
Ever since I reformed and left the toxicity of the manosphere (thank you Rachel Oates and Feminist Cat Lady Spinster among others for showing me it's toxicity), I think not having kids for the sake of helping with Climate Change is a super noble thing to do. I'm not a particular fan of Miley Cyrus, but I applaud her for making a choice for herself to not have kids, especially if it is to help with Climate Change.
As a man in the same age group with the manosphere talkers (Rollo, Rich Cooper etc), after listening to these talkers, these talkers are almost exclusively obsessed about 1 thing: Advocating M40-F20 relationships.
These talkers have little interest in asking 20 year old women if these women are really interested.
@@fortpark-wd9sx Agreed. However, I think they would want them even younger than 20 if possible. Or even younger than 18, which is straight up sick.
@@thomaslawrence6353 so many absolutely would love to "date" (read: abuse) 15-17 yr olds because they're young and naive and literally dont have the life experience to know any better
One topic that would be interesting to see you cover is the one regarding the accusations of grooming coming from conservatives against the LGBTQ community, specifically regarding the examples they like to use such as the publication "Thinking Sex" by Gayle Rubin and whether or not that text is as influential as some conservatives claim.
Would LOVE for you to debunk PragerU!
To be fair, PragerU is bottom of the barrel stuff, their videos are so patronising as if they are aimed at children, and their claims are paper-thin in how weak they are. I actually find it reassuring that so many Conservative personalities endorse it, it proves to me they endorse anything that supports their ideology, no matter how badly presented and poorly researched it is.
I don’t have kids because I was never in a place where I felt emotionally stable enough to be a parent, and I refuse to feel guilty or ashamed about it. My kids would have deserved my A game, and I knew I couldn’t provide it.
22:28 Toothed Vulva would be a _sick_ band name lol
The biggest effects of having a marriage certificate are legal/administrative.
There are elements that provide security and also elements that can cause issues. One positive is legal rights to visit patients in critical care situations where they can't give consent that can't be fought by biological family. Which is an issue for some.
Hi Rachel. I'm a very shy person, I'm not really one ro comment under anything. But I just really need to tell you that your videos have gotten me through 60 hour work weeks and not lose my mind. Your channel is so amazing, its introduced me to so many things, educated me with so many things, I don't think I can ever stop being grateful. And as someone who's first language isnt English, I have always had a bitter relationship with the language but I am just so mesmerized by your diction. You are so well spoken, you have given me inspiration on how to express myself better. You are a gorgeous gorgeous person, I wish you all the love and luck in the world 🩷
Thank you so much, this is so kind! ❤️
04:20 Lauren’s case is very similar to what people in abusive relationships go through. Many people tend to normalise abusive behaviour by saying, “they love me?” And “ if not them then who” and in many cases, “Maybe I am the one who has done something wrong”. I don’t know the exact psychological term for it, but it seems that Lauren is kind of in an abusive relationship with the ideology that she firmly believes in. She constantly verbalise such narratives so that she in her head, normalises, misogynistic behaviour.
I think the psychological terms would be "denial" and "rationalising".
@@AW-uv3cbabsolutely
@@AW-uv3cbyep
Yess!! Thank you so much for another long video Rachel you are the best 😩
Edit : Watching girl defined flick their tongues around is honestly what i needed to kick off the new year
Hi Rachel! Would you consider doing a video on the motherhood penalty in the workforce? I feel like it’s something that is so prevalent and yet no one really knows or talks about it. I think you could do a great video on it ❤
I also want to add- when I studied this topic at uni, at that time I found stats that in the US, the wage gap between mothers and child free women was actually larger than the gap between women and men! Not sure if that stat still stands today, but yeah!
This can also be another good reason for a person to be child free- mothers are taken less seriously in the workforce. If someone is career oriented and has goals to work their way up, having a child can significantly ruin those chances because companies will value and respect you less.
On the contrary, fathers are actually taken MORE seriously in the workforce and respected higher than child free men!
@@Strawberrysoymilkk Omg i didn't know the term but i saw it happen in real life - a colleague who was really really (really!) good and everybody knew (she had previously worked in a very prestigious firm as and she did three times the work of normal workers) was told not to apply for a promotion "because she has kids". As if most of the men in the promoted position didn't have children themselves!!! It was shocking and eye-opening.
She luckily got the position eventually but wtf.
@@Strawberrysoymilkk how is that not obvious ofcorse farthers are valued more in society than men without kids. We would go extinct if that wasn't the case. Bit you've also got to take into consideration that the extra a father might make is going towards the mother and his family so it's not as unbalanced as you think.
@@yota8325 I'd like to believe that but then I'm reminded of how often fathers try to avoid household chores and suddenly the balance is ruined. Very rarely only one partner is supporting the family financially and if both of them are working, both should also work on the home, which doesn't seem to be the case, unfortunately.
Great video, and I just wanted to throw in that circumcision is male genital mutilation and it’s mass popularity in America, and the social enforcements that it is “more sanitary” and such, make it so hard to make people realize what it really is. Many moms are pressured or not given a choice for their child. The majority of nerves are in the foreskin and removal of it massively affects one’s sensitivity. It being done by doctors makes people feel like it’s then okay. And of course it doesn’t compare to the way female genital mutilation is enacted, but Americans in particular need to be pushed to consider why they view one as unacceptable and another not only acceptable but preferred.
I'm assuming the reason why one is deemed unacceptable because the impact and the reasoning behind FGM are IMO a LOT worse. FGM's purpose is specifically to reduce ability to recieve pleasure, reduces function to an INCREDIBLE degree, and even causes reproductive harm. Its like slapping someone vs hitting them in the face with a baseball bat.
I don't approve of any type of genital mutilation at all.
I mean if men properly washed themselves I don’t think the sanitation thing would be a concern. But considering that so many men won’t even wash their asscracks cause they think it’s gay, there’s no way those men would pull back that extra skin and clean under there cause that would be super gay, which could then lead to infections from all the built up dead skin/piss/sweat/other fluids. Of course some men do properly clean themselves, but that doesn’t seem to be the norm for men. From my perspective as a woman, foreskin doesn’t bother me on its own, but bad hygiene does. And so many men have awful hygiene in their nether regions.
Yes this absolutely needs to be discussed. I'd really like to hear opinions on it from people that consider it a part of their faith or just AMAB people in general, see how they feel about the topic
It’s not genital mutilation. It’s harmless when done correctly and actually prevents the spread of STDs.
Happy new year, Rachel and Kyra! Here's to a year of love, treats, and snuggles for you two!
Thanks for being a very well-researched, knowledgeable, eloquent voice for feminism. It's always refreshing to see someone cite sources that amount to more than "trust me, bro" or "well (insert religious text here) says."
Rachel, I think this video should be required watching in middle and high school. Thank you for this amazing video. Though I do watch you because I agree with 100% of everything you say, I learned so much from this video. Thank you again for this great, informative video.
has anyone else ever read the piece by a woman who was pressured into having an ultrasound at a crisis pregnancy center, but then they wouldn't give her underwear and pants back until she agreed to watch a graphic video of late term fetuses being taken apart piece by piece (something that happens only if the fetus is deceased and inducing birth to get it out isn't an option) with claims that the fetus could feel everything the whole time? it was so disgusting and i remember it every time i see a crisis pregnancy center
Amazing video as always! I'm still watching it, but - Rachel, you're my favourite RUclipsr and I just wanted to say how much I appreciate the hard work you put into making your videos ❤️
Thank you!!
I will never get over that clip of Bethany laughing and trying to get Kristen to do the tongue “trick” and Kristen looking like she’s dying inside.
I grew up around a lot of religious conversation and while my parents aren’t like that but I grew up hearing around other family members that if you’re not a virgin you’re basically worthless. I lost my virginity later this year at 23 and I actually feel better about myself and my body and men are actually more interested in me now and it can open me up to more relationship opportunities. I made my sexual debut and I killed it and it was a positive experience for me and I own it and I’m not gonna feel guilty about it
You mentioning you were the first woman of your family to go to university made me realise my big sister was the first woman too (i second) to access higher education in our family... this is chilling a little bit...
Thank you for articulating your thoughts so well. I will quote you next time someone criticizes feminism.
I found this part really sentimental and touching too! 😢
And I really glad that Rachel shared this story with us!
Mii
I agree on one thing she says in the beginning: feminism did "demonize" motherhood--because feminists believe in informed consent and once I learned honest, real statistics about what happens to women during and after pregnancy, I knew I wasnt going to take those risks and do myself that kind of harm. THANK YOU, feminism.
🥺 I felt that hard when you got emotional talking about DV Rachel, please take breaks when you need to! We so appreciate all the work you do ❤ sending you love 💕
The part about genital mutilation made me remember reading the autobiography of Waris Dirie. I had never cried while reading a book. I am crying again now, more than 20 years later. It is horrible that nothing seems to have changed in that regard.
thank you so much for spreading awareness on female genital mutilation. i was shocked to learn how common it is.
i saw you posted and literally squealed lol. ive never heard of lauren chen so im excited to learn a whole lotta new stuff
idk if that was your dog snoring in the background in the clip of you explaining why virginity is a social construct, but whatever it is it's sooo calming to listen to
Happy new year, Rachel!
I have just discovered you (by the end of 2023), and I am sooo grateful that I did. Your videos are like camomile tea for my soul. Thank you so much for your great and important work ❤️
Thank you!
I love when you are posting long videos like this😍😍 thank you for your work❤️ Happy New Year❤
I really hope more people will watch this...most people who watch Lauren's content probably aren't used to hearing arguments and studies supporting her claims and just dwell on her little jokes about SJWs and WOkE people. If they come here and see your approach to any topic maaaaybe they will start to understand that the world is not black and white and that all her privileged standpoints can be be easily debunked by someone who understands more than her neighborhood.
I LOVE YOUR HAIR!!! ❤ thank you for the time and effort you put into making this. ❤
Rachel my goodness, this has to be one of the best videos you've done! so informative and comprehensive, I'm gonna have to watch it a few times through to absorb all the information in here. well done! your videos never disappoint 😊 and truly i hope the best for you going forward in your health journey
How... how did she run face first into the issue and STILL MISS THE POINT??
I never exactly understood what a "social construct" means and this video cleared it up for me really well!
Great video! Full of great information but Rachel's videos always are. My husband and I love all the videos and often have interesting discussions after we watch them. Thanks for all your hard work!
Hi Rachel, great vid! I was wondering if you’d ever be interested in making a video on cooperation in nature, as sort of a refutation of claims that competition is the only natural way for humans to succeed? It would be cool to see a broad overview of different cooperative systems like mycelium networks, eusocial insect, endosymbionts etc as well as the history of the study of these things has lead to the slight paradigm shift towards valuing symbiosis over competitive exclusion (at least in my field).
That’s probably not the best wording but it’s a topic that I love but I don’t have a platform to share my thoughts haha
fun fact about crisis pregnancy center (not fun at all)!! they ran our sex education program in my school county. i use "sex education" loosely because obviously it was just abstinence, but from 6-9th grade (or later if you didn't take a health class as a high school freshman/failed the class) cpc "taught" us the same things over and over again. in my ninth grade health class, they even showed upsetting/disturbing pictures of "consequences" of stds which were "only transmittable through sex-before-marriage." so. yeah theyre bs. i think one of their solutions to dealing with a teenager who had an std was?? to pray?? unsure if i'm remembering that correctly but
Absolutely agree that marriage after living together doesn’t change things most of the time. So many of my coworkers ask how marriage is going and I don’t know how to answer lol. Like my health insurance is better and my taxes are cheaper I guess 🤷🏻♀️
It's been a long time since I've heard of Lauren Chen.
ngl i forgot about her
I know lol. It was a good time while it lasted.
Howdy Rachel, just want to leave a comment, (I'm early enough for you to probably see it). I think I found your channel in 2018, and purposefully searched for your channel again a few years ago because I remebered how much I liked your content. I was in a rough phase of horrible thoughts and was deep in the propaganda of the alt-right pipeline. I want to say how happy I am that you are continuing to make videos about feminism and deconstructing harmful gender roles from purity culture. Your channel has been instrumental and uplifting in my deconstruction of my previously held beliefs. Thanks girl 💃
That girl defined compilation right off the top had me rollinggggg
Your hair is so fly in this video, Rachel. I'd love to know by what method you made those incredible curls, if you wouldn't mind sharing, please! You've got a beautiful mind, too, and changed the direction of my life at a time when I was struggling last year. I found out recently that I'm autistic, at age 39, and hadn't known that. I had an incorrect idea of how someone w/ autism presents, and the wheels began turning for me. So much has come together in retrospect about my life, and I've realized parts of me I saw as 'needing fixing' don't need fixing at all, and make perfect sense.
I feel like sometimes people misunderstand on purpose because they can't argue what is actually being said.
I believe the term is straw man
Im dying, what I thought was the beautiful croaking of a toad I now realize is probably the dog snoring 😂
I love listening to you talking about many different things and I think one of the reasons why is in the beginning of your video. We have similar views of the world, but you can put those into words in the way that is beautifully thought provoking to me. And I really appreciate that! I often find myself closing off on other peoples arguments, but your way of discussing many different points makes me want to apply some of that in my own discussions. Awesome work. And thank you so much!
1:45 as a lesbian i’m jealous of how fast she can move her tongue
wasted potential 😂
I really love your long form content, I look forward to setting aside time to get a snack, a brew and watch x
the numbers you told us about FGM made my stomach drop. oh my god.
And the cycles of family abuse, it’s so sad and so scary. To me this is the true power of feminism, that we can now work and make our own ways and not depend on a man to value us as a virgin, as eye candy, etc.
Thank you for making this video. Lauren sent me down a brief conservative rabbit hole in my teens (fortunately I never went deeper than Blair White).
I can’t watch videos like this anymore because it makes me depressed hearing about the warped ways some people see the world, but these are the sort of videos that got me out of that problematic side of RUclips. So I wanted to at least throw some engagement into the algorithm ❤
'I never went deeper than Blair White' - I'm sure there's a joke in there somewhere... 😁
How is Lauren Chen still around? You'd figure people got tired of seeing her, but here she is.
The second I saw the album cover I knew you’d bring up The Dinner Party and I couldn’t be happier. More people need to know about that work of art.
I tried dating with a purpose in my early 20s and it was a disaster. Now I’m just Burnt out turning 24 and don’t know where to go or what to do. I just want to have someone who chooses me and I choose them equally and there’s a mutual attraction as well as shared values
Don’t worry, 24 is still very young, you don’t need to give up forever! It’s absolutely ok to take a date from dating for a while and focus on yourself and if you happen to meet someone in that time, at least you’ll be prepared for how to figure out if you’re right together when you do. But mostly just look after yourself, you got this
I can definitely relate to Rachel when it comes to the childfree by choice aspect. It saves me so much time and effort when we ask our dates early on whether they want kids or not! This is something that we cannot/should not try to change the others. It's all about our own core values. Also, I personally do not want marriage and thank you Rachel for speaking to my heart as I wholeheartedly agree that it makes the relationship even more special because me and partner CHOOSE to be together even without that legally binding certificate!
I can't believe, that I watched channels like Lauren a few years ago. Back then I also didn't understand what terms like "social construct" mean.
I'm proud to say, that now I do and I've grown to understand so many other things, that people like Lauren choose to stay ignorant about.
2:00:02 "No, of course people don't have children for their labour! But if you don't have children, you won't have people who are tasked with looking after you in your old age." ~ Lauren, apparently
What a good choice of final clip to include. I'm glad that she shows such openness to criticism, which is presumably why she is so easily able to explain the positions held by people who disagree with her. (sarcasm)
Thanks for the hard work on such a draining topic. Chen doesn't appear to put in the research for her videos, but you clearly have put in so much work into yours
Saying that people who have had sex are different than people who haven’t and providing no evidence is also like saying that people who have long hair are entirely different than people who have short hair. Like…
unrelated to the video because I haven't finished it yet but I just wanted to say that this makeup & hair combo looks absolutely gorgeous on you, you look ethereal!
For all the terrible histories of gynecology and so many medications, I'd not want to live without access to the pill. I don't even have any sex, but taking the pill to stop my periods has been amazing for my mental health. And mine are not even that debilitating, it's mainly the hormone changes affecting me badly.
Good luck with the coil!
The one good thing about Lauren I'll say is that I like some of her backgrounds. Her opinions are... not as nice.
Lauren is one of the most irritating and grating reactionaries I have ever seen. She is incredibly bland and hasn’t a single original thought in her head.
@@sumatrannoseven worse. She’s a self hating wasian who makes her racial identity crisis everyone else’s problem (and by everyone else I mean non white people). Only bringing up her Asian side to deflect criticism of her racism. This is coming from a Lasian who had my struggles with my identity as well but I eventually outgrew the need for white approval.
@@sumatrannosasian here too and yep, there are a lot with regressive views around here. :(
A part of why i dont want kids is because i helped my mother take care of her parents when they had dementia and i want to be ready and financially able to care for my mother if that happens to her. I refuse to put her in a home. She didnt do it to her parents and i wont do it to mine. Not to say i couldnt have kids and take care of her, but with the economy i dont want to risk being so financially burdened that either my mother or my children would suffer.