The Process Of Getting Her Back After No Contact Works
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- Опубликовано: 5 фев 2025
- The process and mindset of getting her back after no contact works and she starts reaching out again.
In this video coaching newsletter I discuss an email from a viewer who is new to my work after his relationship of 2 years ended. After about a month of no contact his ex contacted him. They got back together, but he has been making all of the effort and she is making little to no effort. He just doesn’t feel she is that into him and he wants her to passionately want him again. He asks what he can do to flip the power dynamic since he’s doing all the work. He displayed a lot of weakness prior to the breakup and it feels just like it did before their breakup.
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Started following Corey 10 years ago and actually did a call with him on Skype like 8 years ago. This advice makes shit sooooo much easier. Totally easy to be non needy when you utilize his thought process. Women are like cats, when the cat comes around pet it, enjoy it. When it runs off, and it will run off, let it, bye bye kitty. Then wait or better yet hang out and have fun with your other cats. And guess what, the cat always comes back purring and happy to see you. And then it leaves again. Be okay with it leaving. Have fun kitty bye bye. You’re the prize men stop chasing women and they will come to you. It’s hard to fathom because it seems so easy. And it is. It’s that fucking easy.
Damn this makes so much sense bro! Let other men act like the stupid dogs, they go chasing the cat, but can’t get into the spaces that cats can get into. Instead, be like the calm dog that the cat isn’t afraid of and plays with when it’s curious. Sometimes the dog doesn’t acknowledge the cat, and the cat starts clawing at the dog (opening the door) so that something playful can occur. Then the dog gets distracted by something else (purpose) and the cat either keeps clawing for attention or leaves, only to continue the cycle until she finds a new home haha
It’s not to do with an ex, but a girl thats been helping me out once a week for the last 8 weeks or so- it’s a program that I’m in to help me get out more, anyways she works with me one on one and we’ve been going for hikes- I feel she may have some interest unless I’m clueless, she mentioned she had a boyfriend, maybe she’s just being friendly and laughing because it’s her job. She seems like a cute girl.. any advice, thanks, I follow Corey Wayne on and off
@@lukehart7225 Well, if I had doubts of her intrest I would ask her out on a date. But you mentioned she has a BF, so unless she is talking a lot of shit about him and how horrible he is best to maybe play it like this. “ I really appreciate you taking me out on these walks and stuff, “I’m just curious you have any friends who might like to go out for a coffee with me?” TBH it’s hard to gauge as you said she takes you out once a week. Is she a carer, like a nurse. A volunteer? A friend? And all the respect in the world does it have to do with social anxiety?
@@kellykiser7600 she’s like a worker though for this company. She takes me out to these places that I pick, she mentioned her bf once during the past 5-10 weeks; how they’d traveled together and such. My last week with her was meant to be like 2 weeks ago but she’s able to extend more time with me being with her. I guess I could say that though. “Are you interested in going out for coffee? And yes it has something to do with anxiety. Thanks for your help.
@@lukehart7225 Well brother since like I don’t know all the details. I wouldn’t ask the volunteer person out as it could be awkward for her or you. But I mean like I said I don’t know the details, she might be over joyed you asked. I’m not sure as I don’t how you’re all vibing. So yea go “hey your really cool so I know you have some cool friends, is there one who you think I would vibe/connect with over a coffee or a walk?” But just be prepared that it maybe a no and you may feel some awkwardness. But thats cool brother it happens to ALL of us. ALL OF US. From Leonardo Decaprio to Jack Nicholson and every other man. So don’t stress and keep it moving. Maybe there are some online forums where you can find girls that have the same situation as you? Like in regards to someone taking you out of the house. I’m sure there are girls in the exact same situation. Know what I mean?
“The strongest negotiating position is being able to walk away and mean it”this girl was never afraid of losing him because he was always in her face…Get better man!
Any time that temptation to reach out hits me, I come here and shoot down those thoughts
I needed that last week. I got back from a long trip away for 5 weeks and had a rush of thoughts creep back in. Got emotional and only focused on the good part of the relationship, so acted on it and met up. Looking back it’s easy to know it was the wrong move but I was in the wrong head space. She told me how much she cared about me still but “couldn’t go back there” even though I only suggested dating again and not getting back together. She told me she’d just started seeing someone before I left on my trip (could have saw that coming) and so I left, the next day she got pretty angry because I didn’t message her back soon enough even though I was in the middle of moving house. When this happened I just messaged saying “it’s not appropriate for us to meet when you’re seeing someone. I said to you before that I wasn’t interested in friendship so when you agreed to meet me I thought you understood. We’ve made arrangements with other things but while your with someone else, I’m not interest. If things don’t work out then reach out and you can convince me why I should give you another chance. Bit while you’re seeing someone there is no reason to be meeting up” (there was more to it but that’s the just.
We were together 5 years and she told me she wasn’t in love anymore so I walked away. Hence why I said she should convince me, my only annoyance is that I was emotional at the time in terms of my manor. But after this I had to block her on social media and that way she can’t keep checking up on me to see what I’m up to.
I can go into my purpose again and move on with my life. Especially when she’s with someone else who I’m sure hasn’t discovered the coaches work so I’m expecting to hear from her again, but if I don’t it’s still her loss as I know my value.
Should never neglect his work even when you’re in a relationship, I know this now it’s just because after 3-4-5 years, you think everything is ok.
@@sebastianshort5768 nice bro. Yeah never capitulate to those thoughts honestly it never pans out well. Gotta let her know you were the prize all along. As Corey always says “strongest negotiating position is to walk away and mean it”
I keep myself busy, I have a choice to wfh but commute to the office, I do calisthenics out in the parks, I read a lot, smoke cigars, golf, work on my purpose, improve my wardrobe.
Keep going, the sun will eventually set on these hoes.
@@DonCE0to thine own self be true.
Mine reached out yesterday after 3 months of NC. She ghosted me and a couple weeks before NC I chased. She apologized, and I'm playing it cool. When she texts, I respond, nothing more. Just staying a step behind her and making her earn me back
Any update? Congrats buddy
*When you come back into the picture, you need to show that you’ve improved as a person - not just for her, but for yourself.*
Totally works, I’ve been in no contact with my ex for 2 months now and she’s begun to crawl back. Read this guys book
Same. It took her 2 months to reach out to me as well. The patience pays off. To the guys reading this, hang in there!
How'd it go ?
Just got dumped after seeing a single mum for about 6 months, obviously its all my fault! She has gone not contact, but I have decided to not chase or even go back to shis toxic waste. Im resolute to move on. Thanks Coach Corey.
"the illusion of action" is definitely a salient idea to understand.
👍
I remember when I got dumped by my gf couple of years ago, my brother was asking what happened and I was like: "It was mutual, we decided to break up FOR NOW". He couldn't help but laugh at me and said: "Time to grow up bro".
So did you grow up?
After 3 months of NC (messed up first 6 weeks) my ex finally came back. She had rebound and explored option and told me she "was relieved" towards the beginning, then started feeling depressed and not showering regularly. Now, she was and continue doing 100% of the pursuing.
Are you dating her now?
@OrzoNerf I ended up taking her back. But surprisingly, it was NOT a easy choice because when you elevate yourself, time to lose weight, and begin to feel and look attractive to other girls, the single life was starting to get really good. But eventually (4 weeks) took her back, cuz at the end of the day I did love my ex. Now we are stronger than ever.
@@master328m1any update?
@@master328m1Hey man, I'm in a similar situation and was wondering how it turned out for you now 8 months later
What happens now?@@master328m1
It definitely does work. You are awesome.
Corey impacted my life more than any life coach, and he was the first life coach I ever found. 2-3 years ago I was binge watching Corey’s videos, I’ve grown in every area of my life since then. You’d be surprised what you can accomplish do in 1-2 years!
“Throwing darts in a blizzard”that’s a good saying coach never heard you say that one before
2 months here too and followin what the program calls for is the only way with this. SERIOUSLY.
She's in line with it ! The best thing I ever did, especially with this gal- is to follow the book !
This day and age, I don't think anything else would work. Tines have changed.
DO NOT GET CAUGHT UP IN THE TEXT HELL.
Thanks Coach ! You rock !!
You must know your value, E-Mailer. Don’t pursue someone who doesn’t want to be pursued by you. Focus on yourself to be a better version and attract people than just her. Trust me and Coach, it’ll be worth it if you put the time into reading the book and knowing the material.
To the emailer who wrote this story. Don't ever try and win back your ex-girlfriend with going no contact after she dumped you. Don't even chase her! And don't even try to attract her! She's not worth it! Cut all ties with her! Move on! Let her be! Walk away and never look back! Have self-respect for yourself!! What you need to be doing, is to be on your grind! Focus on your purpose! And if you don't listen and wake up, then one day you're going to have to learn the hard way.
The more things change is the more things stay the same
Doc love says you can't go back, she will never get your bad behavior out of her mind
There's a certain attitude and a mindset that you need to align yourself with where you don't even have to try, everything just flows naturally. Once you get off the right foot, the path will naturally form for you.
preach, and it doesnt come from fear and insecurities
I’ve been in NC for 4 months. She ain’t coming back lol. Everyone has them come back in a couple months with contact. But I’ve been heavy following my passions and career
It's like someone else on another YT channel that says this. "They always come back."
@@chriscarr7397 it’s just the name of the game some do some don’t.
@@Jaguaist we were together for 4 years. Talked about kids marriage and all that. Attraction was lost due to me focusing on my business too much and neglecting the relationship and her in the midst of working her first job and inconsistent schedule. But other things as well but those were big factors
@@Jaguaist no very in my masculine with purpose and drive. She told me that me being too focused would ruin the relationship. I have more avoidant tendencies I’ve been told. I tried letting her know that the last couple years were very important for me to get my business going. I also worked full time so 2 jobs.
I had one come back recently after 17 years.. 🤣.. too bad I got even hotter.. she did not 😅😅
Thank you, Bobby, for reminding guys that you at least are leaving the option of reattracting her by doing this
What do you do when your in this situation and have a kid with her and visitation is the only time you see your kid. I can’t back away or I’m neglecting my child.
Thank you for helping me with my anxiety coach you are doing gods work
3% man just arrived at my door when I was watching this video lol
Not an easy process for sure but it can be done. I've used Coach's advice for this more than once and it has worked each time.
But you have very little room for error in this stage.
Good luck to all the guys dealing with this.
I'm in the same situation....I don't want to half ass my situation
Hi Corey I really value your advice I have bought your book and started reading Hares the problem I have a disorder with reading I am totally normal and sane but reading causes me MASSIVE anxiety and that cannot be fixed Its basically a form of dyslexia I've been reading your book for one month and gotten through about 20 pages and its AGONY the result is I retain NOTHING from it It would take me 40 years to read it 15 times and I would still retain NOTHING from it PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE make a audio form of your book I'm sure many of us would be eternally grateful
There is a audible version
Very true....very true thank you for the video
Hey Corey: will you do an analysis about Jonah Hill trending topic? I believe his texting was how a 3% man should have replied, and his ex girlfriend bad traits were exposed after applying 3% man principles..
Yeah if you still want that…
She really gave him some chances
What if I was the one who got scared and put up walls and my girlfriend of 4 years asked me to change, but I took her for granted, and I did not change now she gone. I begged and chased, but now know contact 10 days so far. I have been getting the help I need, but maybe she gone forever
In my case I ended things, when I ended them I was truly in love with this women, however she entered into a period of depression and anxiety so she told me that she did not feel love for me anymore, it was a tough situation to be in, I said that i still wanted to be with her, her mother also told me that I should not be in this situation and if I wanted to leave I could, her father told me to be patient. Anyways as i said I ended things, it was 7 months ago, her mother still asks how I am and texted me last week.
My nc period this time was only 2 weeks. I pushed her away.. she never stopped thinking about me. She was utterly heartbroken that I did push her out.
She never wanted the breakup.. but the dynamic that I could walk away set such a powerful tone that her love is far more fierce than it was before.. and all in a good way.
Now just learning to accept the love she’s giving.. first time I’ve had to deal with m, what I do feel, is complete devotion on her end.. every man knows how rare that can be.. so I might as well see this through.. because I do love and care about her.
I went no contact after we both agreed to part ways, in a very caring way. We held no grudge, but the LDR was getting harder and harder to live. I met her again on a festival about 4 months after, she is two times more in Love now ^^. But I am going my own way, dating and meeting great girls. However, we had some great time. Spin many plates lads !
Question how does this work in a LDR? I’m moving to her area and she said she’ll visit me once I’m there, but it was more of a situational break up due to the distance which has now changed in the meantime since breaking up. She checks in on me and we have FaceTime sex when she does, but uses the distance as an excuse. I never reach out first etc and never ask to rekindle when on the phone, she asks me about other woman, but just said the relationship got to the point it was too grey due to the circumstances. Once there, how would you re engage? Let her come to me ofc, but treat it as a new person and give her the benefit of the doubt, but take it slow and get her to earn me back or follow 7 principles?
how do you mutually "break up" and then as a guy, ask her to get back together a week later?
Lol you don't
I wonder what corey thinks of the 40 laws of power
48
I have heard all this before from many content creators but no one ever mentions things to do if you have children and multiple financial obligations which make it impossible to do no contact. I would like to see advice there.
Thats fucking hard work that one my friend is going through that now
You only have contact to conduct "business". You keep your responses short and only about the topic that's necessary. Let her wonder about what you're up to and how you feel.
Watch "7 principles of getting your ex back" and "do's and don'ts of getting your ex back" Corey talks about how to keep it just to business and that's it. Lots of videos by him mention kids
Do we let the woman call 100% of the time for exes only or for all women? I thought the instruction is to call as the man and set up the date in normal circumstances. I'd appreciate some clarification here.
How many time can they come back? she came back once…left again..no doing 3 weeks no contact and she is liking all my posts and hearted my story this morning….think she can come back to try one more time?
Should it matter what they do during the time?
What if after no contact the ex is open to meeting up and texting from time to time (just small conversations to rebuild rapport since long distance) but isn’t asking you out on dates? Should you just go back into No Contact?
if she’s reaching out that’s when you set the date (or virtual date if LDR) if she doesn’t want to then tell her to let you know if she changes her mind and go back to no contact
When NC is broken by an ex, YOU set the date by keeping it very simple. He says something like "hey it's so nice to hear from you, when are you available for dinner?". if she's not available or doesn't want to meet, simply say "hey I totally understand, let me know if you change your mind" and go back to NC. If you guys have a date, simply set up another date once a week, every week. Perform the 3 Hs (see his other vids). You peel back to about 20-30% contact after about 2 months of doing this OR when she's the one contacting you more and more. Basically the more she contacts you first, the less you contact her first. If at anytime she decides to "break up" or whatever, simply say, "hey its been great having fun with you, let me know if you change your mind" and go back to NC. super simple formula. it helps when you focus on yourself as a main priority and date other girls at the same time. only enter a relationship with a girl when she's significantly aligned with your values and she's in her femininity as a submissive partner AND you're in your alpha masculinity.
corey, recently me and my ex girlfriend have been talking again, texting a lot. we hungout on friday, and had sex multiple times and drank wine and had dinner. is this a good sign for the future with her? i obviously know that we aren’t jumping right back into a relationship, which is told her we are going to take things really slow. but i cant deny that i do want this woman to be my girlfriend again and or my wife
So what if she sent me an Instagram reel after I went no contact for a month I still see her at work I say good morning and good bye to her when I leave if I pass her and if I have to be next to her I'll crack a joke from time to time but that's about the extent to it
did she ever come back to him again? How did the story end up?
why getting her back? 😅
Everyone deserves a second chance
@@jayef7234depends
@@jayef7234 Everyone deserves a 1st chance.
Well, aside from the possibility that cheated, the guy likely acted needy and turned her off. So it's not that she just wasn't into him, it's that he didn't know how to hold his masculine frame. Assuming she is a good woman, he has changed for the better and probably loves this woman. When guys chase girls out of their lives, you can't blame the woman..
@@illahee24 .... grow up and be a man
I like this content, tired of the red pill bitterness, just to get laid content. To steal her heart is the true reward and challenge
I have a question.
what do I say if a girl I am going out with ask me if I am seeing other girl? (and I am seeing other girls, but do I tell her?)
Also what do I say if she ask if I am sleeping with other girl?
You tell her your dating that’s it.
@@Ssa9143 ah okay thanks for answer.
And what if she ask me if I am sleeping with others? I just say the same?
I say "I am dating" ?
@@kaptenr3 you say you are not the type of guy to kiss and tell
@@ChadOliver-b7yyessir it’s like a cheat code I use to make them feel more comfortable too let lose a little 😂
10 to 15 times...
If women thought like men, everybody would be married.
💪🏾💪🏾💪🏾💪🏾
14:37
😮
A girl I was courting for several months texted me just a before a date I had planned for us on a Sunday night, saying she was flattered but just wanted to be friends - but was still interested in going to dinner. I had previously asked her to respect me and my time and to let me know if she was not interested. I told her I appreciated her and her forwardness. We proceeded with the date, primarily because I needed a distraction from some family issues. After dinner we sat by the waterfront and I gave her time to express how she felt and I told her I was not sure we could remain friends. I did not say definitively that we should be friends or that I will not be her friend, we ended the night ambiguous as to where we stood, with the "just friends" status having possibly been rescinded.
The problem here is that we are coworkers. So I did see her the next week while at work, and I was friendly warm but spent little time talking. I wanted to show her I was not really affected by her rejection, which actually is true because I believe she will come back and I am in a good place in my life. I have not texted her since that Sunday night date where I gave her instructions on where to meet me. I did have some extended contact with her last week as her sister, who also works with us was having a hard time that day. The both of us were checking on her and communicating how the sister was doing in person briefly.
The sister's dilemma resolved itself and lead to them both individually telling me that: "Sometimes we wait until the last minute to do something and make situations harder on ourselves because of this". When the girl I was courting told me this, I genuinely and mistakenly asked: "Is that what you did with me?" She looked past me with profound sadness in her eyes, thinking, then looked to me and said "not exactly" or "not too long". Something to that effect. I immediately realized this was a mistake and in a firm and low tone apologized sincerely that it was not a fair or appropriate question to ask. She brushed it off, but it was eating at me. I went into my next meeting completely distracted and feeling down.
I bumped into her right after that meeting. She asked me how I was doing and I was honest, telling her I felt bad about what I said, reiterating that it was simply unfair. She forgave me but asked if I wanted to talk about it later after work. I declined and my mood improved. The girl I like and her sister were going away on a family trip that weekend. So very briefly before the end of the day I stopped by her desk. I asked her if the earlier offer to talk was her way of wanting to discuss our relationship, as I know she is somewhat shy. So her asking me if I wanted talk could have been her way of saying she was ready. While said she does want to talk about us, she was honestly going to be busy packing after work. I said that was fine and she should focus on having fun and supporting her sister this weekend. I said that when she was ready to talk to let me know. It has been nearly another week and I have been focusing on myself, my friends and work. I have not texted her either.
I know I messed up here but I don't know if it was catastrophic. I intend to remain silent, as part of what pushed her away was the dissolving of ambiguity of my feelings towards her and over pursuing. She had already pulled away in the form of texting, despite us talking at length everyday at work and making dates. I recognized her pulling away but was mistaken in my strategy to resolve the issue. Unsure of her attachment style I slipped up and thought the answer was to provide security in being forward and honest with her and myself. In hindsight this was an error despite it being 5 months of courtship when the first mistake was made.
I don't want to lose this girl but I may already have. In the past this would have devastated me. However, I am in a good place in my life right now and this was my first time around truly courting a woman, as in the past other girls came to me. There is more to this story but I just needed to get my thoughts of what is recently occurring down on paper so to speak.
Thank you for what you do Cory.
The moment she said friends, cancel the dinner. You want romance not platonic bullshit. Dont tell her how you feel, be indifferent.
@@juniorcorrado7868 I knew that is what I should have done but being that I am good friends with her sister, and her sister was actually creating scenarios for the girl I like and me to spend time together - if I just cut out the girl I actually want I lose a friend as well. We also all work together. The night ended with a potentially rescinded "let's just be friends" also.
I do appreciate your insight and I hope you are doing well in your journeys!