LET THEM - JUST LET THEM

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  • Опубликовано: 26 сен 2024
  • A piece written by Cassie Phillips - about having control of 'you' - by letting those who maybe try to take over control or even manipulate you just get on with being what they are.
    She has a lovely way with words. I tried to find a link to include to her work but to no avail.
    Apologies for the hammering of the rain - I started, and didn't want to stop
    #justdoit #control #beingyourself

Комментарии • 12 тыс.

  • @Cheshirelass
    @Cheshirelass  5 дней назад +110

    If you are checking out this video - please do subscribe - there are many other videos that could help you, support you. Take care, Dee

  • @im_yeonna
    @im_yeonna 2 месяца назад +4092

    " if they're ok with never seeing you, let them" this hit me so much.

    • @Cheshirelass
      @Cheshirelass  2 месяца назад +106

      It does strike home doesn't it? D

    • @im_yeonna
      @im_yeonna 2 месяца назад +14

      @@Cheshirelass thank you for ur beautiful words

    • @strvwcolls
      @strvwcolls Месяц назад +1

      but it hurts tho, especially when you miss seeing them

    • @strvwcolls
      @strvwcolls Месяц назад +45

      but it hurts a lot tho, especially when you used to talk everyday and you miss seeing them

    • @im_yeonna
      @im_yeonna Месяц назад +14

      @@strvwcolls i agree since it became a part of my routine and my everyday life. What i did is i tried to learn a new skill or new hobby

  • @Justjoey17
    @Justjoey17 3 месяца назад +8155

    If the algorithm recommends this when you need to hear it, let it.

    • @Cheshirelass
      @Cheshirelass  2 месяца назад +204

      Thanks for the smile. D

    • @markpatterson1109
      @markpatterson1109 2 месяца назад +61

      I can’t tell you how badly I needed this today :(

    • @Cheshirelass
      @Cheshirelass  2 месяца назад +60

      @@markpatterson1109 Take care. D

    • @omggezus
      @omggezus 2 месяца назад +10

      For real. The day I needed it it showed up

    • @mehak3049
      @mehak3049 2 месяца назад +12

      I had a terrible heartbreaking breakup 6 months back and this video keeps popping up in my feed i just didn’t had it in me to open it until now when i searched it and heard what I should’ve heard back then😭😩

  • @alia93859
    @alia93859 3 месяца назад +5898

    "If they want to leave, hold the door open, and LET THEM." 100%

    • @nevermines
      @nevermines 3 месяца назад +33

      Louder omggg 😭

    • @januszdworak4780
      @januszdworak4780 3 месяца назад +68

      Yes. But then shut the door and lock it.

    • @67kingdedede
      @67kingdedede 3 месяца назад

      ​@@januszdworak4780 better yet just forget about it. they have closed their chapter. and best yet, onto yours

    • @PatientSalafi
      @PatientSalafi 3 месяца назад +6

      yes

    • @jenniferlee1410
      @jenniferlee1410 3 месяца назад +5

      I read this AS she was saying this past

  • @stewartdaggett-yz9jt
    @stewartdaggett-yz9jt Месяц назад +148

    I'm a 60 year old man, who unashamedly bawled my eyes out during this x

  • @Gh_Manchester
    @Gh_Manchester 4 месяца назад +18662

    I’m positive that RUclips is the universe talking to me.

    • @charlynehill5999
      @charlynehill5999 4 месяца назад +527

      Seems like it, i think it's God hearing ours hearts cry

    • @justinplumb
      @justinplumb 4 месяца назад +284

      The algorithms are just getting more personal and adjustable to you. People have similar problems and you going thru them almost every day so the fact you come across videos all the time coincidentally makes sense and is the same for me

    • @arundhatisingh4063
      @arundhatisingh4063 4 месяца назад +85

      God i swear

    • @Smellyninja11
      @Smellyninja11 4 месяца назад +39

      Schizophrenic delusions or seeing signs that arnt there

    • @lapetitmimi1079
      @lapetitmimi1079 4 месяца назад +33

      Yes. What a few days my son and I have had. Broken by bullying. Thank-you for this. ❤

  • @GodsSouljaa
    @GodsSouljaa 4 месяца назад +18976

    We have no control over other people’s decisions. We hurt ourselves by trying to control. LET THEM do as they please !!

    • @Cheshirelass
      @Cheshirelass  4 месяца назад +552

      But far too many in relationships of any kind do control all aspects of their partner's life - including decisions they make. They do not seem to be hurt by this as it is usually their aim. D

    • @maryjolyons6400
      @maryjolyons6400 4 месяца назад +27

      My situation isn’t a partner but relationship with my daughter sadly
      It was never like this but after her dad left us in 2006
      Cracks started appearing (I prayed from first night we were in own for LOVE to be in me no bitterness as it would destroy me & my daughter ,
      I have had people come in from then some short periods females helping some longer and few who have remained to this day and always been THANKFUL 🙏🩷🙏
      As with out Universe God and ones who helped I wouldn’t be here today .
      But our children know which bottoms to press that unsettle us
      We’ve had periods of wonderful times but I always swear of changed mood in my daughter now has been in relationship 15 years grandchild light of my life 9-yr’s
      But it’s come again cracks
      Cannot talk with her about she shouts and says we can can’t spk but I haven’t raised my voice spoke quirky as we were walking outside
      told go away she wasn’t going awalk with me
      And began walking faster I couldn’t keep up
      Shouting as she was going she didn’t want anything to do with me
      I turned and went home this happened past Wednesday this wk .
      Now told I can only see my grand daughter twice amonth
      I’m a American have lived in uk over half my life
      Called spoke to my brother in Twincitys he said why do want to stay there
      You’ve put up with periods of this for past 16 years
      And sad should move back to the states .
      It isn’t that easy I’m a pensioner that’s all I have
      There’s so much to consider mainly cost
      There’s family two sets friends I’ve kept close to over years
      These I would have near me family friends who love & care about me 🙏
      No more holidays alone
      (There have been erratic x.mases togetger but only afternoon home early I was greatful to be included but rest the x.mas season no inclusion )
      One year went to friends don’t get me wrong I was so touched but hard to explain felt even worse
      Some x.mases helped at Homeless center by me .
      My brother has close relantionship with his kids & partner of over twenty years gets along with has them over and his ex wife all at holiday times plus the three of them attend events sometimes .
      He says I’d have them all around me .
      I have three sets very good friends here only spoke with one of what’s happened
      Meeting up one today and third one Saturday
      Unsure of spking rgds this till I find out if it’ll work out financially
      Pardon my rambling but wanted to say it’s not a partner but my situation with my daughter .
      Has anyone similar problem ? If so how have you handled it ? I would be grateful to hear 🙏🩷🙏

    • @pokemonpro8438
      @pokemonpro8438 4 месяца назад +14

      ​​​​​@@Cheshirelassthis was my experience, and he was sadistic. I had to change things because it was harming our children, not just me. It was very dangerous leaving and he character assassinated me to everyone with all his lies, including some of my own family, my little sisters. He lovebombed them too when we lived closer at the start. He is a very believable LIAR. I had an evil aunt do that to me prior for financial reasons. I was an impediment to her greed.

    • @Cheshirelass
      @Cheshirelass  4 месяца назад +41

      @@pokemonpro8438 Well done for being strong for you and your children. Take care. D

    • @h0ll9w
      @h0ll9w 4 месяца назад +5

      came in just the right time…

  • @sunmarsh
    @sunmarsh 3 месяца назад +4250

    Maya Angelou said it best: “When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.”

    • @notyour_honeybun
      @notyour_honeybun 3 месяца назад +16

      Omgg I've always loved this quote.

    • @CherG-222
      @CherG-222 3 месяца назад +4

      Thank you 🙏 so much for that, Her work always brings 🧬 Life in Me.... Thank you for the Reminder 💕

    • @Mayousse
      @Mayousse 3 месяца назад +5

      Couldn't agree more eith Maya & I think about this quote all the time. So true.

    • @jimbarrofficial
      @jimbarrofficial 2 месяца назад

      You mean Hamas and terror supporters at American colleges and universities? Absolutely. Thanks for stating the obvious.

    • @kimhumiston2686
      @kimhumiston2686 2 месяца назад +4

      I didn't pay attention to this quote when I should have. Now I know.

  • @Melohalo
    @Melohalo 9 дней назад +18

    As someone who is currently going through a separation with my partner of five years this has been helpful in reinforcing my attempt at self-care and improvement during this difficult time. It's very hard not to lay blame on myself and let my anxiety for the uncertainties ahead take over. This message has resonated with me and I will try harder for my own sake. Thanks for sharing Dee.

    • @Cheshirelass
      @Cheshirelass  9 дней назад +1

      Take care - do check out the follow up to this - D
      Video link
      ruclips.net/video/F306JD9fGG4/видео.html

  • @cherrybonbonz
    @cherrybonbonz 4 месяца назад +7658

    “And do not automatically take the blame and punish yourself for any of the things that they have done” caught me off guard ❤

  • @fai411
    @fai411 Месяц назад +1669

    "You dont have to punish yourself for any of the things they've done."
    I needed to hear that

  • @lauravilsone5554
    @lauravilsone5554 4 месяца назад +8557

    That moment when RUclips algorithm gives you a gem...

    • @veeroseerum
      @veeroseerum 4 месяца назад +44

      It was truly the break in the chaos for a moment for me i swear

    • @Raquel-001
      @Raquel-001 4 месяца назад +13

      Right?!

    • @Puerta955
      @Puerta955 4 месяца назад +6

      just yesterday i saw my ex for the first time since we broke up while on exchange after 4 months… my head was doing ok until that point, and now its all spinning again. youtube always covers me

    • @piama18
      @piama18 4 месяца назад +8

      “Total” gem 💎

    • @alexxyay1973
      @alexxyay1973 4 месяца назад +5

      🙌🏽❤

  • @marianadrewer425
    @marianadrewer425 17 дней назад +26

    the rain makes this even more beautiful

  • @farahfarzana8752
    @farahfarzana8752 4 месяца назад +4692

    If they want to come back to you after breaking you into pieces, never let them.

    • @HOLLYHOCKFLOWERS
      @HOLLYHOCKFLOWERS 4 месяца назад +61

      Agreed 100%

    • @lauram.5555
      @lauram.5555 4 месяца назад +57

      I‘m in this situation right now and I really want to let them eventhough I probably shouldn‘t :(

    • @HOLLYHOCKFLOWERS
      @HOLLYHOCKFLOWERS 4 месяца назад +171

      ​@@lauram.5555. If it costs you your peace, its just too expensive.

    • @farahfarzana8752
      @farahfarzana8752 4 месяца назад +78

      @@lauram.5555 If your inner voice tells you to not let them anymore, then you shouldn't let them. Always listen to your inner voice

    • @sashaenglish2755
      @sashaenglish2755 4 месяца назад +7

      Yes ❤

  • @marijncat6711
    @marijncat6711 4 месяца назад +39640

    old people giving advice on youtube and social media is what this world needs
    edit: i didn't expect this comment to blow up so before anyone else comments that calling someone "old" is disrespectful; i really don't believe growing old should be seen as something negative or that there is more worth inyoung people. if you don't agree with that, that's okay.
    now gonna take this lady's advice, and let y'all comment what you want

    • @productivityproject5360
      @productivityproject5360 4 месяца назад +421

      Literally my favorite content

    • @jasmineshelton759
      @jasmineshelton759 4 месяца назад +382

      Wise *

    • @ramonawilliams7269
      @ramonawilliams7269 4 месяца назад +512

      Wise, Beautiful, Experienced Souls would be a more lovely choice of words 🤍

    • @janelleodionu3631
      @janelleodionu3631 4 месяца назад +97

      facts!! That is why I subscribed immediately before even watching any of her videos!!

    • @TysonASMR
      @TysonASMR 4 месяца назад +150

      Yes this side of social media is great. The rest sucks haha

  • @finalomega8894
    @finalomega8894 3 месяца назад +2210

    It’s rainy, peaceful, and she’s pretty.

    • @NickDaGamer1998
      @NickDaGamer1998 3 месяца назад +24

      She was definitely a beauty when she was younger.

    • @DR-rw7es
      @DR-rw7es 3 месяца назад +115

      She's a beauty right now ☺️

    • @bernicerogers2383
      @bernicerogers2383 3 месяца назад +43

      Yes exactly why do people have to be pretty or handsome only when they're young? ❤

    • @sandybeach6870
      @sandybeach6870 3 месяца назад +11

      A lovely soul

    • @thegirlinquestion
      @thegirlinquestion 3 месяца назад

      @Shaun-kh7icfather time has his way with us all

  • @Charlie_Loves
    @Charlie_Loves 4 дня назад +17

    I’ve recently gone through a dramatic friendship transition, realizing the lack of importance others in the group had for me destroyed my mental wellbeing and has affected my health. I didn’t realize the extent to which I was inputting my efforts to fix things were unfortunately beyond my control. Now it is time for me to heal, and this video has helped me tremendously. Thank you.

    • @Cheshirelass
      @Cheshirelass  4 дня назад +4

      My pleasure - put your efforts into yourself - to heal and to move on to friendships that are more balanced and you can be your true self. Take care. D

  • @lanchiee34
    @lanchiee34 4 месяца назад +18064

    for whoever needs to hear this: my mom always told me “you were fine before them, you’ll be fine after them”
    edit: it was my grandmother who told my mom those words when she would struggle w breakups, then my mom would tell me🖤

    • @Cheshirelass
      @Cheshirelass  4 месяца назад +450

      Wise words. D

    • @TOSORIO-q8h
      @TOSORIO-q8h 4 месяца назад +54

      Amen to that!!!!

    • @yomaroh
      @yomaroh 4 месяца назад +142

      My mom says that as well!
      Or sometimes she’ll say “You came into this world without them and so you’re strong enough without them”

    • @nishthagupta1357
      @nishthagupta1357 4 месяца назад +60

      You were never the same after meeting them though

    • @crystalperry4769
      @crystalperry4769 4 месяца назад +6

      @@nishthagupta1357 right.. I miss it

  • @katherineXXpierce
    @katherineXXpierce 2 месяца назад +2564

    “Let them see the heart in you that didn’t harden” -painful yet pure and beautiful

    • @YaqubShukri
      @YaqubShukri 2 месяца назад +4

      💔💔♥️💪🏽🫶🏽

    • @ggpeachxs
      @ggpeachxs 2 месяца назад +5

      True

    • @marijuarez3773
      @marijuarez3773 2 месяца назад +1

      Ouch

    • @catshez
      @catshez 2 месяца назад

      @@katherineXXpierce that's the point I started crying

    • @marianocente7011
      @marianocente7011 2 месяца назад +4

      This is why I was going through a difficult time when a person in my past suddenly called me wanting to connect just because. I let them in, and showed them that my heart was not hardened. They hurt me yet again. I let them…. But I also let them leave again when they chose to disrespect my boundaries. Part of me thinks I won’t let them in again, but I hope that one day they may come back and I want to let them love me. After all, I’m strong enough to love them, forgive them, and pray for them

  • @galinaatanasova1779
    @galinaatanasova1779 4 месяца назад +3126

    “Let them loose you. You were never theirs because you were always your own”thank you 🙏

    • @pendennis123
      @pendennis123 4 месяца назад +20

      Lose

    • @TheHamburgler123
      @TheHamburgler123 4 месяца назад

      ​@@pendennis123Loose in this sentence also works, as in let them set you free.

    • @JronDon854
      @JronDon854 3 месяца назад

      Lose

    • @JronDon854
      @JronDon854 3 месяца назад +7

      @@TheHamburgler123 No it doesn't. Sounds weird

    • @lauriepoune
      @lauriepoune 3 месяца назад

      @@JronDon854 Well languages are weird sometime , weird rules, weird pronounciations ...
      Beside that point , I feel like "lose" and "loose" can both work in this context because it can be the contrary of "contained" (by looking at some definitions), so pretty much you could say this quote could means that you do not need to contain those peoples in your life, you should always let them go away from you .
      Idk I think it fit well x) .

  • @Jastherealest
    @Jastherealest 11 дней назад +22

    She posted this 4 months ago, and most of the comments I see were just posted a couple of hours ago, which means this video popped up randomly for most of us. Maybe God or the universe knew we all needed to hear this. There are reasons for stuff like this. Everything isn't a coincidence. Thank you for sharing, ma'am ❤.

    • @Cheshirelass
      @Cheshirelass  11 дней назад +2

      The comments have been coming through steadily for 4 months - and I have read every one. Take care. D

  • @AlfiansyahHendry
    @AlfiansyahHendry 4 месяца назад +2903

    The rain background,
    The profound message,
    The soothing voice,
    This is it! Thank you 🥹🥹🥹

    • @annenonymousse
      @annenonymousse 4 месяца назад +12

      I love the sound of the rain as she was talking. I felt at peace 😌

    • @Merlodica
      @Merlodica 4 месяца назад +9

      A gentle British woman tenderly sharing advice with young ones makes me feel warm and fuzzy

    • @traciprovins3221
      @traciprovins3221 4 месяца назад +3

      Absolutely

    • @traciprovins3221
      @traciprovins3221 4 месяца назад +6

      I really needed this. And it’s so fantastic to see something intelligent, useful and heartwarming without snark on social media. This is the only thing I’ve seen all day that was worth watching, and I love it ❤❤

  • @Anonymous1dskjoadi93
    @Anonymous1dskjoadi93 Месяц назад +1219

    After 80 years on this earth I realized that Happiness is accepting what life gives you more than actually getting what you want.

    • @Rebel-pt1se
      @Rebel-pt1se Месяц назад +8

      You’re so right.

    • @I_SuperHiro_I
      @I_SuperHiro_I Месяц назад +3

      In the end, I want to know that the world has given me more than I’ve taken from it.

    • @Msleetheconsultingcoach
      @Msleetheconsultingcoach Месяц назад +13

      I literally just woke up today at the age of 34 and said this to myself! I'm just going to accept what life give me and be happy with it and stop having so many expectations.

    • @roshanjayakumar8503
      @roshanjayakumar8503 Месяц назад +1

      i feel like everyone has a different perspective on this, i.e, how you should live your life to be as happy as possible

    • @anj464
      @anj464 Месяц назад +1

      so true

  • @bronwentaylor9575
    @bronwentaylor9575 3 месяца назад +1103

    I think it was Maya Angelou who said, "Never make someone a priority for whom you are only an option."....so true.

    • @livingdeadgirl888
      @livingdeadgirl888 3 месяца назад +23

      It's very much a daily choice, choosing myself... Choosing to flow toward me and what makes me strong.

  • @sylviajones191
    @sylviajones191 2 дня назад +8

    I didn't realize how much I had needed to hear these words until now. Thank you Ms. Dee, truly.

  • @notislamay
    @notislamay 3 месяца назад +2258

    Did anyone else find this video at just the right time? It's such a coincidence that it found its way onto my feed, and I'm glad it did. ❤

    • @lilie-louiseisabellaelias374
      @lilie-louiseisabellaelias374 3 месяца назад +15

      Same here, this is crazy!

    • @alakbarovah
      @alakbarovah 3 месяца назад +7

      Same🫠

    • @donnaleesalerno
      @donnaleesalerno 3 месяца назад +6

      Yes, same.

    • @falguni.bonaparte
      @falguni.bonaparte 3 месяца назад +3

      RUclips and all applications probably know our conversations hence this suggestion

    • @notislamay
      @notislamay 3 месяца назад +4

      @@falguni.bonaparte That’s terrifying, but makes complete sense 😭, like one time I was randomly talking to my friend about going on holiday to Norway and then when I opened TikTok later that day the first video was about travelling there, it’s quite scary really.

  • @afrofaeries
    @afrofaeries 4 месяца назад +5709

    I’m 19 and I love receiving advice from elderly women! I never knew my grandma because I’m an orphan, so I thank God that He sent me here!

    • @lauralong6695
      @lauralong6695 4 месяца назад +279

      This is sweet. I’d be your grandma if I could. I had an older woman as a mentor when I was young woman and mom. I loved her so much. I also had my mother who was my best friend. Now my daughter is my best friend.

    • @Cheshirelass
      @Cheshirelass  4 месяца назад +409

      Take care. D

    • @lisabyl3240
      @lisabyl3240 4 месяца назад +47

      Good you learned early in life in your young adulthood. Wish I had known this Truth at age 19. God bless ❤

    • @hdhdhd-4935
      @hdhdhd-4935 4 месяца назад +22

      @@lauralong6695you seem so lovely may God bless u🥺💖

    • @mattparr3038
      @mattparr3038 4 месяца назад +27

      I'm the same and I'm 40. So wise, and elderly tend to be more caring so you're more likely to listen. When we sense care, we listen.

  • @rise9666
    @rise9666 Месяц назад +465

    "Let them see the heart that didn't harden,
    Let them love you"
    I'm literally crying

    • @GreenTara1234
      @GreenTara1234 Месяц назад +2

      Same here, it made me feel release 🙏🏼💖

    • @caroleblossom4087
      @caroleblossom4087 Месяц назад +3

      I'm try to be understanding and remembering when I was younger and I was too busy to be there for my parents and grandparents, especially grandparents because they
      lived a distance away. Looking back, I feel bad and wish I reached out more...but I did love them deeply and still think of them almost daily. Tried being there for my parents
      when they got older and needed me more....as much as time would permit with me working full time and them living a bit of a distance as well. This video helps me accept what is and be content with my life at 82 and be grateful and not unhappy about how other people don't seem interested in me. Thank you 🙂

    • @untamedheart6820
      @untamedheart6820 Месяц назад +1

      @@rise9666 listening to this all I could do is cry, it still very raw to me when my husband of 10 years cheated and abandoned us for his mistress without any care or proper closure. He just left abruptly and told me that he’s in love with a woman he met at work

    • @rise9666
      @rise9666 Месяц назад +1

      @@untamedheart6820 I can't imagine how painful that had to be...
      I hope your heart never hardened, and please spread love for the worthy
      And especially for yourself ❤️‍🔥

  • @mai-mo6fp
    @mai-mo6fp 18 дней назад +33

    i never had a grandma to give me life advice and your kind word really made me tear up, thank you

  • @MillieAwna
    @MillieAwna 4 месяца назад +1738

    “Let them see the heart in you that didn’t harden” I felt that personally 🫶🏽

    • @juliemetaxa1480
      @juliemetaxa1480 4 месяца назад +6

      So did I. ❤❤

    • @coldfact.
      @coldfact. 3 месяца назад +1

      Towards urself!

    • @izzyis-real
      @izzyis-real 3 месяца назад +2

    • @mem8516
      @mem8516 3 месяца назад

      What is the meaning?

    • @67kingdedede
      @67kingdedede 3 месяца назад +6

      @@mem8516 its easy to bring your past hurts to new people. you build your walls, and thus block out connection. be aware of this. dont let your past hurts keep power over you. dont be scared to show people your unhurt self. dont be scared to show people that you wont stand by as they hurt you.
      I hope youre young. If you are, you have a lot to learn, and you will - so long as you never forget to love yourself. and never forget to love others.

  • @the.perfect.ideal.
    @the.perfect.ideal. 4 месяца назад +944

    “if they are showing you who they are and not what you perceived them to be, let them”.

    • @TickleyourBuds1111
      @TickleyourBuds1111 Месяц назад

      But remember you don’t have to be what they are showing u of u don’t want to be
      You have the choice to choose…. Your life is your life …. If they choose the life they have …. No1 has the right not force u to have the life they choose for themselves
      I learnt to always be truthful to myself ….. I was fine when they won’t in my life and I will be fine when they won’t be
      Never allow someone to over hurt u for there ego

  • @dwlsn93
    @dwlsn93 4 месяца назад +1869

    The 🌧️ rain is a perfect backdrop for your reading ❤

    • @Yirragee
      @Yirragee 4 месяца назад +12

      ❤ this yes so beautiful hey 😊

    • @nikicarrie4071
      @nikicarrie4071 4 месяца назад +4

    • @NikitaBastet
      @NikitaBastet 4 месяца назад +4

      I found it very annoying and distracting cause I have ADHD

    • @erikamonique44
      @erikamonique44 4 месяца назад +6

      I love the rain. This was my confirmation. 🖤

    • @Misslotusification
      @Misslotusification 4 месяца назад

      Indeed, funny she apologises about it in at the top...

  • @Glorygirl-111
    @Glorygirl-111 6 дней назад +24

    This video really comforted me, thank you dear you seem very caring. God bless you!

  • @analicearmbruster6441
    @analicearmbruster6441 4 месяца назад +849

    "if they want to misunderstand you, let them' touched me

    • @Cheshirelass
      @Cheshirelass  4 месяца назад +60

      Its often the case- and if they can - they surely will. It hurts. D

    • @Geico23
      @Geico23 4 месяца назад +3

      Nice

    • @tamarag9981
      @tamarag9981 4 месяца назад +2

      That touched me too!

    • @dinajones2761
      @dinajones2761 3 месяца назад

      Me too

  • @thesourcepath
    @thesourcepath 4 месяца назад +2390

    "let them love you." Was what stood out most for me.

    • @Cheshirelass
      @Cheshirelass  4 месяца назад +194

      Don't think you will be alone with that. Probably as many would love that to be the way - but as part of a genuine, balanced relationship - no matter what variety. D

    • @movingforwardopportunity667
      @movingforwardopportunity667 4 месяца назад +6

      ❤❤❤❤❤❤

    • @Twinkiepie52
      @Twinkiepie52 4 месяца назад +23

      Lonely 🥺😢so alone, literally no one to talk with .

    • @LoveGodLoveOthers111
      @LoveGodLoveOthers111 4 месяца назад

      I'm sorry you're so alone right now. Please know your Heavenly Father is only a prayer away. He's always there for us and wants us to talk to him about everything. His Son, Jesus Christ is always there too and understands perfectly all our pain and sorrow because he took it all upon him, not just our sins. I love this scripture from John 14:18 "I will not leave you comfortless: I will come to you." He has helped me and comforted me through the darkest nights.🙌🙏❤ @@Twinkiepie52

    • @61sunset
      @61sunset 4 месяца назад +14

      ​@@Twinkiepie52 I am so sorry to hear that. Wishing you all the very best. Treat yourself with kindness, enjoy and be grateful for the small things in life...that's how I get through, but I also speak with God Almighty and He strengthens and comforts me. ❤

  • @tanja.11
    @tanja.11 4 месяца назад +2373

    Being happy is a decision. Still don’t forget that you‘re „them“ to somebody else too.

    • @Cheshirelass
      @Cheshirelass  4 месяца назад +88

      Absolutely. D

    • @Ggswjn
      @Ggswjn 4 месяца назад +7

      This needs more likes 🤧

    • @godzillamanstreb524
      @godzillamanstreb524 4 месяца назад +6

      Good point

    • @mymoreelaine1037
      @mymoreelaine1037 4 месяца назад +1

    • @arty_mart
      @arty_mart 4 месяца назад +35

      I've lost a few friends, sometimes because of me, sometimes because of them, sometimes because of both of us. This was my first thought. All of my flaws and mistakes in each friendship came to the forefront of my mind as she ran down the list of things to let "them" do. I realized I'm just as much "them" as they are. It makes me feel less like a villain, and more like a human. Great comment.

  • @vindell1206
    @vindell1206 28 дней назад +7

    youtube has been recommending this video to me for so many days and i kept ignoring it. im glad i watched it now. i needed it.

  • @mansourelhajj9968
    @mansourelhajj9968 4 месяца назад +2344

    It's hard to let them, but over time, it makes more sense, to let them.

    • @Cheshirelass
      @Cheshirelass  4 месяца назад +67

      True. D

    • @monikapv10
      @monikapv10 4 месяца назад +21

      True but unfortunately ultimately u have to let them because they leave u with no other choice . So then it becomes a question of saving yourself . Sad but true !

    • @ohbiteme
      @ohbiteme 4 месяца назад

      :( mmmh.

    • @iPeeOnBabies
      @iPeeOnBabies 4 месяца назад

      @@monikapv10 Lol, you always have a choice in this universe. Consequences will follow that choice, but you can always tell someone to Fuck off. Try it on me :P

    • @excusesbegone
      @excusesbegone 4 месяца назад +2

      I have no CHOICE
      and there in the surrender comes

  • @cydneyturner2083
    @cydneyturner2083 2 месяца назад +717

    "you have to accept yourself for what you are without changing yourself for others..."

    • @zerufilm2847
      @zerufilm2847 2 месяца назад +2

      !!

    • @jordanchildress176
      @jordanchildress176 Месяц назад

      Thing that hit me most during this entire video. I just read this while she said it… shit is disheartening.

  • @lillustpotion
    @lillustpotion 4 месяца назад +956

    Not only is aunty wise af she’s a fashion gorlllll. Pink paisley velour and minky brown?! Purrrrrr 💅🏾💅🏾💅🏾

    • @Cheshirelass
      @Cheshirelass  4 месяца назад +234

      Thank you - Now, that is another first!! D

    • @Cloverkitty
      @Cloverkitty 4 месяца назад +53

      Classy but sassy. Hope I can be more fashionable as I age.

    • @user-du4gw
      @user-du4gw 4 месяца назад +24

      Periodt💅💅

    • @babieeden
      @babieeden 4 месяца назад +30

      this entire exchange is sending me💀

    • @msshay421
      @msshay421 4 месяца назад +5

      S/O to my big sissy NeeNee putting me on to the scheme REST PEACEFULLY SISSY 😘🙏🏾

  • @evantang101
    @evantang101 4 дня назад +17

    There are something especially soothing about the sound of raindrops in the background, lovely video!

    • @Cheshirelass
      @Cheshirelass  4 дня назад +2

      Thank you - it is hammering down with rain as I write this!!! D

    • @bexiexz
      @bexiexz 4 дня назад

  • @KathrynMcFarlane-hu5hy
    @KathrynMcFarlane-hu5hy 2 месяца назад +406

    Control is such a dangerous action. It produces anxiety fear and a multitude of emotions. Dont ever try to control someone else. Just take care of yourself with gratitude and authenticity

    • @luk45ful
      @luk45ful Месяц назад +8

      This right here. One mistake I did that I regret. It made me anxious and it was horrible. I needed to hear this video to just “let them”.

    • @MyLifeIsNotAGameForYouToPlay
      @MyLifeIsNotAGameForYouToPlay Месяц назад

      @@KathrynMcFarlane-hu5hy lots of anxiety and fear 🥺😔

  • @goldenlele
    @goldenlele 4 месяца назад +702

    This is EXACTLY what I needed to hear. It just hurts so bad when you love them and would never do to them what they’re doing to you

    • @kaitlynbacon3334
      @kaitlynbacon3334 3 месяца назад +10

      Especially with family :(

    • @cauha12
      @cauha12 3 месяца назад +2

      Have to love yourself more.

    • @angelhellokitti
      @angelhellokitti 3 месяца назад +1

      Exactly! ):

    • @liverbird956
      @liverbird956 3 месяца назад +1

      I learnt to let go of family members a few years ago.
      They are definitely not the people I thought they were.
      As I always say
      "you do you and I'll do me"

    • @tendr247
      @tendr247 3 месяца назад +4

      Children and grandchildren 😭

  • @tryingtolive3
    @tryingtolive3 4 месяца назад +1157

    I have no family, no siblings, no parents, no ant, no grandparents.. no adult to turn to for advice, this warmed my heart❤️❤️❤️

    • @Cheshirelass
      @Cheshirelass  4 месяца назад +74

      You are welcome - thanks for joining us. D

    • @Tk30nette
      @Tk30nette 4 месяца назад +27

      Same as my life 😢

    • @Mamayopmemama
      @Mamayopmemama 4 месяца назад +15

      Same. For the record lmao

    • @maureendibari2384
      @maureendibari2384 4 месяца назад +52

      You always have God

    • @asmrfoodieuk7965
      @asmrfoodieuk7965 4 месяца назад

      ​@@maureendibari2384😂😂😂aye mystical man in the sky who has helped the homeless so much!

  • @lfrost53123
    @lfrost53123 14 дней назад +11

    a beautiful grandma giving me advice on a rainy day is something i never thought i needed

  • @dino_woph
    @dino_woph 2 месяца назад +475

    the algorithm knows, "they don't value you and you deserve to be valued"

  • @mistag42698
    @mistag42698 3 месяца назад +965

    My mom always told me “do your best and forget the rest.” To the person that’s reading this just know that you’re valuable and that you matter. ❤❤❤

  • @legendofbillyjean
    @legendofbillyjean 3 месяца назад +470

    The sound of the rain combined with her soothing voice is the perfect ambient cleanse . Thank you!

  • @clover2569
    @clover2569 10 дней назад +9

    This video is why I love the internet. It can be so horrible, but then you find pockets like this and remember how valuable it can be.

    • @Cheshirelass
      @Cheshirelass  10 дней назад +1

      Thank you so much - please do spread the word! D

  • @ashatan4554
    @ashatan4554 4 месяца назад +1284

    I don’t know why this came up on my feed but I desperately needed to hear this today.

    • @Cheshirelass
      @Cheshirelass  4 месяца назад +107

      The vagaries of YT. I have no idea why this has happened, but wish that I did - it is I believe the first time. Do look after yourself and don't heap lots of blame on yourself. Take care. D

    • @ashatan4554
      @ashatan4554 4 месяца назад +6

      @@Cheshirelass 🙏❤️

    • @c.kainoabugado7935
      @c.kainoabugado7935 4 месяца назад

      Universal Law of Attraction. You attract what you need. It works with social media because the law consists in social/human networks and electronics does not hinder our needs and can facilitate or meet our needs as need arises. Believe it, accept it, use it. This is age of Aquarius ♒️ new ways of being is here. We are learning about ourselves who are energy beings in physical bodies emitting frequency that matches the earth. Social media n electricity are also energy, everything has energy. The earth frequency is rising causing people's frequency to match her. To match her frequency we are forced to understand energy and spiritual things where the new earth frequency is moving all humans towards. Good things to come✨️
      Knowledge of Self💫
      Self-Care💚
      Courage✊🏾

    • @positiveMindset665
      @positiveMindset665 4 месяца назад +3

      Same

    • @zoricababic137
      @zoricababic137 4 месяца назад +4

      AI is reading our thoughts.

  • @LaChicaconSuerte-1111
    @LaChicaconSuerte-1111 4 месяца назад +1051

    Here are my main mottos: 1) I can´t be bothered with people who can´t be bothered. 2) Carry on regardless 3) Be who you are

    • @LaChicaconSuerte-1111
      @LaChicaconSuerte-1111 4 месяца назад +83

      Also, if you feel everything is crashing and your peace has been disturbed, look after yourself in this order: 1) physical body: drink water, eat properly, shower, put on clean pjs, and sleep at least 8 hours 2) mind: detach from social media, other media, ads, apps, and toxic people (this can include family members and significant others) 3) spirit: be true to yourself and be kind to yourself and others. Try to be near nature and the sea or at least have plants, flowers, water around. Follow the Truth. 4) Do something creative whether painting, writing, making something (crafts, baking, carpentry, etc) 5) listen to calm or upbeat music with no shouting or swear words in it!

    • @nightfallenx
      @nightfallenx 4 месяца назад +9

      @@LaChicaconSuerte-1111 thank you for this, friend, i needed this. sending you love.

    • @LaChicaconSuerte-1111
      @LaChicaconSuerte-1111 4 месяца назад +3

      @@nightfallenx same to you and take care x

    • @shondalesstudio
      @shondalesstudio 4 месяца назад +2

      ​@@LaChicaconSuerte-1111 Yes! ❤❤❤❤🎉🎉🎉🎉

    • @gilliankilby-gjini2676
      @gilliankilby-gjini2676 4 месяца назад

      I agree with this but what about if they are your own adult children..

  • @jaydenv.s9300
    @jaydenv.s9300 3 месяца назад +392

    “You belong to nobody but yourself” “it’s not selfish, it’s self care; self nurturing” needed this; thank you for this video

    • @marleneflourentzou680
      @marleneflourentzou680 3 месяца назад +5

      You belong to the Good Lord

    • @mrsmacca126
      @mrsmacca126 3 месяца назад

      @@marleneflourentzou680AMEN.

    • @jaydenv.s9300
      @jaydenv.s9300 3 месяца назад

      @@marleneflourentzou680 I agree, I meant people wise.

  • @josephbelisle5792
    @josephbelisle5792 2 дня назад +4

    Very well said and well chosen words. I am at a crossroads with my family. Our family has been dysfunctional and toxic since before I was born. I have been putting up boundaries to get healthy. But they dont realize how toxic they are. I have realized I am things they can never accept. When they find out they will try to get me back to where they are. I cant accept that. I cant go back into their world of self delusion. Self ignorance. Bigotry. Racism. Sexism. So im finding myself having to create new boundaries they will not like or accept. I offered them to come along with me to be more healthy and aware but they refused.
    Great video.

    • @Cheshirelass
      @Cheshirelass  2 дня назад

      You are showing great strength. Take care and stick to those boundaries. D

  • @theauthormindset
    @theauthormindset 4 месяца назад +390

    I think the rain was a perfect backround. Rain is for cleansing and washing away the energy that no longer serves us. This video came at the perfect time. Thank you.

  • @deniseborges6293
    @deniseborges6293 4 месяца назад +618

    Yes! True love gives people free will! It doesn't seek to manipulate others into giving what they don't want to give.

    • @Cheshirelass
      @Cheshirelass  4 месяца назад +59

      Absolutely - it's when agendas creep in that even things are a problem - and then even what once seemed to be a true love sadly can change. Take care. D

    • @BibleBound333
      @BibleBound333 4 месяца назад +1

      Where was Judas free will when he betrayed Jesus?
      Was it not spoken of by David thousands of years before Judas was born? Did not Christ tell Satan to go into Judas and to do what he does quickly. Did not God choose between Jacob and Esau before the 2 boys were born who he would love and who He would hate. There is nothing the 2 could of done to change their fate.
      How do the spirits of divination that mediums call upon know what's going to happen in your life before it happens? Because our lives are predestined and predetermined just as those God redeemed where foreknown before the foundation of the world.
      (Ephesians 1:4)
      (Ephesians 1:11)
      (Roman's 8:29-30)
      Free will is a myth.

    • @ENTPhilosopher
      @ENTPhilosopher 4 месяца назад +9

      ⁠@@BibleBound333Christianity a myth.. hahaha

    • @thewishingpooltarot5425
      @thewishingpooltarot5425 4 месяца назад +8

      Hundred percent correct 💯
      Love is about freedom, giving each other freedom and letting each other be themselves.
      And loving each other for who they are.

    • @Sarah-psalm127
      @Sarah-psalm127 4 месяца назад +9

      ​@BibleBound333 prophecy doesn't mean forced will, it means knowing what that person's will will be like. God already knew the end from the beginning and the choices we would make and who we would be.

  • @HeyBuddiesClips
    @HeyBuddiesClips 3 месяца назад +302

    My mum always told me “they’ll need you before you need them.” It’s true! Everyone that’s turned their back on me or thought they found new, more fun friends to spend time with and left me by the road side, they’ve always come running back to me in a crisis. Their true and dependable friend. Now I’ve learned to keep the door closed to the fair-weather friends. Mum was right. She usually is.

    • @Cheshirelass
      @Cheshirelass  3 месяца назад +14

      Thank you for sharing your words. D

    • @lylyginny
      @lylyginny 3 месяца назад +4

      Omg why is this so me 😭

  • @pegbuckner5074
    @pegbuckner5074 Месяц назад +8

    I wish she was my aunt!! I’d sit with her every single day in that conservatory and listen to her soothing advice!!! ✨💖✨

  • @forjessfromjess
    @forjessfromjess 4 месяца назад +479

    These videos are the reason why RUclips should exist.
    It’s always lovely to find gems like these.

  • @PACE-
    @PACE- 4 месяца назад +2377

    How yt know im hurtin rn😭

    • @prellalove7652
      @prellalove7652 4 месяца назад +12

      🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾

    • @adianajimenez9187
      @adianajimenez9187 4 месяца назад +29

      no literally, i never even watch yt 😭

    • @BB-to8zm
      @BB-to8zm 4 месяца назад +7

      Samee😭

    • @pn7134
      @pn7134 4 месяца назад +34

      Same. He ended our 6 year rs 10 days ago

    • @adianajimenez9187
      @adianajimenez9187 4 месяца назад

      @@pn7134 i’m so sorry ml, i wish you all the best in your healing journey. 💗

  • @whisper1017
    @whisper1017 3 месяца назад +302

    All you young people, listen up. Age is wisdom. Been there, done that.

    • @superntrl1
      @superntrl1 3 месяца назад +3

      Nowadays some young people say age is just a number and they are shamelessly having affairs with older cougars who are old enough to be even their grandparents

  • @vlbc888
    @vlbc888 7 дней назад +11

    This video has shown up in my recommended over and over for a few months now but I haven’t watched it for some reason. Finally, after leaving my toxic relationship I watched this and cried. Thank you so much for taking the time to share this gem with us ❤

  • @dan5660
    @dan5660 4 месяца назад +631

    Most people can't comprehend how powerful this really is, because many people are conditioned to act out of emotions regarding other people's actions in a vain attempt to "control" them(which usually doesn't happen). When you let others do what they do, it deprives them of any possible desired reaction from you, and they are often left puzzled instead of satisfied they got a reaction from you. This is the way to deal with negative & confusing behavior.

    • @Cheshirelass
      @Cheshirelass  4 месяца назад +62

      I so agree - I have to admit, sadly from experience. Thank you for your comment - it is appreciated. Take care. D

    • @HeavenlyLights
      @HeavenlyLights 4 месяца назад +7

      Totally YES 🩵🩷❤️💚🧡💛💖

    • @lauriecolvin3620
      @lauriecolvin3620 4 месяца назад +4

      Right on!

    • @lisalee2885
      @lisalee2885 4 месяца назад +21

      It quite the smart person who can see their own ego and decipher the feelings and actions they would normally take. It is wonderful to let them be. I often pray for them to heal and be happy. Doesn't mean they don't piss you off 🤣 You just get to figure out WHY it bothers you 👍

    • @CamilaFulana
      @CamilaFulana 4 месяца назад +4

      I took me so much time to realize that, now I’m trying to act on it but its hard

  • @helenarichard
    @helenarichard 2 месяца назад +385

    My ex gave me very poor contact and communication. It would infuriate me and made me want him harder and chase him until I became so ill I lost my mind. Then I read a lot into going zero contact. Decided to let him... I broke off all contact. It was painful. But something interesting happened. The tables turned completely. He started chasing me, started getting agressive to try and communicate with me, started getting desperate. For years... Because I never contacted him again. He is still stalking me here and there. He is not over me, I know it, and I dont care anymore. i found someone who truely loves me and I am so glad I did this. I finally found self respect.

    • @Cheshirelass
      @Cheshirelass  2 месяца назад +17

      Thank you for sharing your story with us, D

    • @SimsChannel09
      @SimsChannel09 2 месяца назад +1

      I love this!!!!

    • @antirrhinumMajus-p4f
      @antirrhinumMajus-p4f 2 месяца назад +16

      like an arrow, you must be willing to be pulled back in order to move forwards.

    • @an.ca.1536
      @an.ca.1536 2 месяца назад +15

      I'm going through the exact same thing right now, for the past year and a half I've been dealing with defensiveness and lack of communication that have made me anxious and depressed. I should have left the first time I told him we should break up after 3 months together due to his lack of consistency and nonchalant attitude. I gave it another shot only for it to get worse, as well as my mental health slowly degrading. Brought me to want to break up again 6 months ago but he said "we'll be fine" with no change until today...I decided I no longer want to give my all to someone who shows no care and consideration towards me, someone who never prioritizes me and refuses to have proper conversations and meet my emotional needs. I hope he won't start chasing me, but knowing how big his ego is he probably won't. I just want to heal and be happy again..

    • @mickey35933
      @mickey35933 2 месяца назад

      @@an.ca.1536this is my EXACT current situation. Are we all living the same life?😢 we will be okay. Let them🙏

  • @DVB1848
    @DVB1848 4 месяца назад +567

    At 75, I have realised the wisdom behind Let them theory. I have achieved a total peace in my heart. It does work, but it requires you to let go of all the hurt and pain.

    • @Cheshirelass
      @Cheshirelass  4 месяца назад +52

      that can be the most difficult D

    • @georginahsubeb923
      @georginahsubeb923 4 месяца назад +5

    • @cocoa3900
      @cocoa3900 4 месяца назад +3

      Yes, I try so hard to let go of the hurt and pain. Idk what to do. I want to be content. I am afraid I will die of a broken heart.

    • @DVB1848
      @DVB1848 4 месяца назад +6

      @@cocoa3900 sorry to know about your hurt. I would like you to ask yourself these questions. ‘Does anyone care about my hurt? What do I gain by holding onto this pain and hurt?’ I can imagine what your answers will be.
      You know that you are only hurting yourself by holding onto those feelings, and isn’t it time to let bygones be bygones, so you can feel at peace to enjoy the rest of your life?
      It won’t be easy, but you will understand yourself better by letting go off your hurt, forgiving those who hurt you. We would be saints if we could forget all about it, but forgiveness brings us peace. It is worth it, because we are worthy of having peace and happiness in our hearts.

    • @monikapv10
      @monikapv10 4 месяца назад

      I totally get it . But does letting go mean to stick stick around and keep forgiving ?

  • @nonsens.kapitanie
    @nonsens.kapitanie 6 дней назад +10

    the fact that this video showed on my page right after my breakdown since i let my boundaries get stepped on hit me.

  • @swaggyfatima4254
    @swaggyfatima4254 4 месяца назад +1229

    Elderly British women make me smile. Idk why they just do.

    • @Cheshirelass
      @Cheshirelass  4 месяца назад +184

      I am smiling too now!! D

    • @swaggyfatima4254
      @swaggyfatima4254 4 месяца назад +7

      @@Cheshirelass 🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻

    • @user-du4gw
      @user-du4gw 4 месяца назад +9

      ​@@Cheshirelass i love you

    • @Noahwalter-bs4ts
      @Noahwalter-bs4ts 4 месяца назад +4

      I've never seen one before😭

  • @j.celestekee658
    @j.celestekee658 3 месяца назад +313

    I needed this channel in my life! Too many 23-year-old “life coaches” on here giving advice they found on the internet. I want to hear from the elders.

    • @gelliebeane6789
      @gelliebeane6789 3 месяца назад +5

      Amen!

    • @KasieMusic
      @KasieMusic 3 месяца назад +4

      Exactly... my therapist is in her 20s, and I so much wish to have someone older and actually experienced... but that's not easy to find. The more I'm happy to find such valuable content. Since my granddad passed, no one sharing such wisdoms with me any more

    • @notyour_honeybun
      @notyour_honeybun 3 месяца назад +7

      Experience and wisdom doesn't always come with age. Being open to learning from anyone will teach you a lot. But, I also get what you mean as well.

    • @katewalsh6417
      @katewalsh6417 3 месяца назад +1

      My favourite I'm alive and safe thank you

    • @katewalsh6417
      @katewalsh6417 3 месяца назад +1

      I just missed my beautiful grandmother and then the toxic spirt friends took over I've been pychic since I was 4 it's such a long story were still reporting it can't explain still I'll

  • @JenniferSmith-jw3dw
    @JenniferSmith-jw3dw 3 месяца назад +268

    I loved this poem so much that I had "Let them" tattooed on my wrist. It's a message worth spreading.

    • @Dadolphinsmakemecry
      @Dadolphinsmakemecry 3 месяца назад +6

      And ya know what? I think that's cool af,i might get that as a last tat in my life turning 50 next month,and either i'm letting her go or she proves she's worth another 30 years we shall see. But great idea!!!

  • @nadiagarcia6313
    @nadiagarcia6313 5 дней назад +14

    These types of of videos have never came up on my RUclips but I needed this at this very moment that I came across it on my recommended while just scrolling and I would say it definitely helped and reassured me❤️🙏🏽

    • @Cheshirelass
      @Cheshirelass  5 дней назад +1

      I do hope you have joined us. Take care D

  • @emilypound
    @emilypound 4 месяца назад +650

    And this is why I have no friends. I far prefer to have none than surround myself with a bunch of fake narcissists. Took me a long time to realize that. But it's been one of the greatest lessons of my life

    • @Cheshirelass
      @Cheshirelass  4 месяца назад +268

      There is a great belief that we should be surrounded by lots of 'friends'. For some maybe, whilst for others they are happy with their own company. If you feel like a bit of company from an old girl - do check out my playlists on which I take you out to lovely places and natter away. Take care Emily. D

    • @lifeslessons9889
      @lifeslessons9889 4 месяца назад +66

      Noooo …just choose better!!!!

    • @24JJ821
      @24JJ821 4 месяца назад +53

      I totally relate to you Emily. No more narcissists in my life, and I feel pure and authentic to be me.

    • @Arripa-777
      @Arripa-777 4 месяца назад +77

      Hobbies are better than fake people !

    • @monac1504
      @monac1504 4 месяца назад +20

      Was thinking the exact same thing yesterday!

  • @TheMirandalorian
    @TheMirandalorian 4 месяца назад +502

    The sound of rain the background made this all the more relaxing ❤

  • @D4NC3Rable
    @D4NC3Rable 4 месяца назад +287

    Suddenly I'm 7 again in the greenhouse listening to the grandmother I never had telling me one of the most important lessons of my life and this will always be a blurry memory save for a few specific sentences and I'll always have a love of rain and plants leftover.

    • @Caareenkm6726
      @Caareenkm6726 4 месяца назад +4

      Except for that one constant loud drip that was interrupting the steady soothing rainfall!

  • @D3adRomanc3
    @D3adRomanc3 15 дней назад +9

    All the tension in my body from this past traumatic week seemed to slip away when she said "Hold the door open and let them go." Quite lovely, thank you!

  • @user-vo5hp9od4y
    @user-vo5hp9od4y 3 месяца назад +173

    “Let them love you.” This hit me deep. I have always been afraid of affection even though I crave it so much…

    • @mtn381
      @mtn381 2 месяца назад

      Me! Since I was little, I have felt incapable of being loved. I didn’t see it as possible. But if you allow me to share, this year, day by day, I’ve been meeting God. Now I know I always had (and will have) a Great loving one. I’m learning to love others in a much sweeter way, even myself. And I can hope for genuine love in my life :)

  • @sam905
    @sam905 4 месяца назад +442

    " Let them see the heart in you that didn't harden"❤️❤️❤️

    • @parisss333sm
      @parisss333sm 4 месяца назад +10

      Love this. This is true victory

    • @seniorarubia
      @seniorarubia 4 месяца назад +3

    • @SolutionsWithin
      @SolutionsWithin 4 месяца назад +2

      @@parisss333sm and it’s painful along the way, but forges wisdom.

    • @alexapollice3889
      @alexapollice3889 4 месяца назад +1

      This was such a great reminder of “love me or leave me” type energy. Really just allowing yourself to be true to you. And “let them” see how soft your heart still is despite the mistreatment.

    • @eagleznest411
      @eagleznest411 4 месяца назад +2

      Yes this ia golden ❤🥰

  • @cc967
    @cc967 2 месяца назад +171

    I’m so tired of being repeatedly used and hurt. This advice will save my health and dignity. Thank you.

    • @ΥπαπαντήΣωτηρίαΠαπαδογιάννη
      @ΥπαπαντήΣωτηρίαΠαπαδογιάννη Месяц назад +2

      Maybe it's time for you to set your eyes look forward to your heart and ask some very specific questions :
      *How I enter in a relationship, is it me who chose the other person or the other chose me?
      *Why I want to be with this person, makes me better person, makes me happy or he / she has something that lacks from me and it challenges me?
      *Before I connect with this person was able to be happy and feel full filled on my own or was expecting someone to make it for me?
      *During this relationship did I have the self confidence to ask for things I wanted or refuse things I didn't?
      *Do I tend to give more to others with a bad impact to my personal esteem and nutrition?
      *Do I give so many to others in order to get prized as a very good person?
      *Do I tend to believe that I can change the other person?

    • @ΥπαπαντήΣωτηρίαΠαπαδογιάννη
      @ΥπαπαντήΣωτηρίαΠαπαδογιάννη Месяц назад +2

      once you find your answers it will be clear to you. In our life some bad situations tend to come again and again in a very specific way in order to testify whether we learned how to behave properly and how to love ourselves first and above all in a healthy way.

    • @ΥπαπαντήΣωτηρίαΠαπαδογιάννη
      @ΥπαπαντήΣωτηρίαΠαπαδογιάννη Месяц назад +2

      Take your time to retreat, love yourself and give him the best prizes. If you start to feel full filled then everything will change positively.
      Wish u the best, love from Greece

  • @jasmin3687
    @jasmin3687 4 дня назад +11

    How she reads sounds very emotional but also regretful, yet peaceful, so inspiring

  • @Manuelkhing
    @Manuelkhing 2 месяца назад +115

    My girlfriend broke up with me today, and I got this video. The universe send this to comfort me and help me move on. I let you sweetheart. Go in peace 😊

    • @kiddo3323
      @kiddo3323 Месяц назад +4

      Mine did on Sunday. Thank you for modeling it so beautifully. I say too "Go on sweetheart. Go in peace."

    • @rubylimey7614
      @rubylimey7614 27 дней назад

      It's going to be ok🙏

  • @mamabutterfly9778
    @mamabutterfly9778 4 месяца назад +249

    I feel like the universe sent me this video to watch just at the right time.

    • @Cheshirelass
      @Cheshirelass  4 месяца назад +17

      I aam so pleased - and hope that you found it helpful. Take care. D

    • @heather_5
      @heather_5 4 месяца назад +2

      Same! Timely message! First time discovering this channel along with this video :)

    • @Richmond_Hill
      @Richmond_Hill 4 месяца назад

      @@heather_5me too

    • @cameron.cobalt
      @cameron.cobalt 4 месяца назад +3

      Me too, I’m crying right now trying to deal with my girlfriend breaking up with me. Your comment likes are at 111. Bringing me back to my spiritual phase I had a couple years back. I would constantly see reoccurring numbers all day long and I was tapped in to source of the universe. I need to get back into it more. :(

    • @heather_5
      @heather_5 4 месяца назад +2

      @@cameron.cobalt Saw your comment at 11:11! :)

  • @carosgarbagecan7828
    @carosgarbagecan7828 4 месяца назад +297

    I am 16 years old and this same phrase “let them” has changed the way I view myself and the way I view the world. It helped me heal from ugly relationships that I was trying so hard to keep while I was completely ignoring ME. I let these people control the way I valued myself and since they never saw my value, I didn’t either. Let them go. Let yourself grow

    • @Cheshirelass
      @Cheshirelass  4 месяца назад +11

      Well said. D

    • @ruthbowman5928
      @ruthbowman5928 4 месяца назад +2

      Learn early to say, 'Do as you please. But know that I will, too.'

    • @DolphinsPlayingInAquaMoonlight
      @DolphinsPlayingInAquaMoonlight 4 месяца назад

      You are wise for a 16-year-old. I wish I knew this at your age. I am 39 now and I have let too many men hurt me both physically, emotionally and mentally. I have learned to value myself and my peace of mind now, but it has taken a lot of time to understand that I needed to see my own value and love myself for the amazing being I am, and not let these cluster B personalities determine my value. I thought I had learned in the past, but ended up with the same person in a different wrapping, just because I was in love. But I was in love with his potential and not who he really was. I ignored the red flags because I wanted to see the best in him and I saw his potential so clearly. But this person wasn't living up to his potential, and you can't force another person to grow. He put up a great act and was very charming, but in reality he was vibing low and not willing to grow and evolve, and he used me and cheated behind my back.
      So if I could give any advice to younger people out there, and there are probably some older people who need this advice too, it would be to never fall in love with someone's potential. See them for who they are right now, not who you think they potentially could be one day. And don't ignore the red flags! Listen to your intuition when something feels off, even if you can't put your finger on it. If you are constantly feeling unsure and questioning their behaviour in your mind, something is most likely not right.
      And another advice is to stay away from people with big anger issues. You don't need that drama in your life, and they will never change.
      I wish you all the best in life. Never forget what you wrote here today. Some people are so charming and slick that they can make you forget the wisdom you thought you had learned.

    • @Sharon-ud4ke
      @Sharon-ud4ke 4 месяца назад +1

      So good to know this truth at 16 years old 😊

    • @HealthyHairJourney
      @HealthyHairJourney 4 месяца назад +1

      Wonderful encouraging words from a 16 year old for me as a 50 year old. Thank you

  • @Loraccndl
    @Loraccndl 4 месяца назад +345

    Just imagine this being your grandma… what a guidance you’d have in life 🥺

  • @ratyzezele1683
    @ratyzezele1683 4 месяца назад +240

    As someone who’s been suffering from very low self esteem for years it feels very warming to see these kinds of videos. I wish I could hug you grandma 🫂🫂🫂

    • @Cheshirelass
      @Cheshirelass  4 месяца назад +28

      Please do keep joining us - do come along on our video walks too - they are relaxing and we need that! Taake care. D

  • @7Jennifer
    @7Jennifer 4 месяца назад +559

    I am almost 54 and have zero actual real friends. A handful of acquaintances. No more family ties. I want the kind of friend that I am (have been) to others. I don't think that's too much to ask. I also believe in meeting people where they are, and I do but when they either start to take more and more or just show up only when they are in need, I'm out.
    Over time, people show who they really are, and I am choosing not to settle. I'd rather spend time alone, with my best cat, my books, the outdoors, great movies, my plants and so on. I am always open to real friends; they just seem to not exist in my realm at the moment. I'm okay with that.

    • @Cheshirelass
      @Cheshirelass  4 месяца назад +141

      Jennifer - if you are ok with being alone, as many of us are, until you find friends who remain friends, have you thought of joining a club - maybe crafting, gardening, walking - whatever you fancy. You would then be meeting people with similar interests. You do say in my realm 'at the moment' - so maybe the time just hasn't been right for you to meet with people with whom you gel.
      Until then, do join us on our video walks to lovely places in nature, places of interest. We'd love to have you along. Take care. D

    • @elainerobertson1988
      @elainerobertson1988 4 месяца назад +24

      Me too. Well said.

    • @7Jennifer
      @7Jennifer 4 месяца назад +22

      @@Cheshirelass I have considered that but haven't dipped my toes into meeting up with other groups of interest yet. Maybe someday! I'll check out the walking videos.... thank you, Dee!

    • @Cheshirelass
      @Cheshirelass  4 месяца назад +15

      @@7Jennifer It would be lovely if you could join us. D

    • @cicerodiello1
      @cicerodiello1 4 месяца назад +27

      I’m the same age and have moved from Australia to Italy. I am with my Mum and her little dog. I don’t have friends. I know many people and my family are not available. I am not unhappy. It was very easy to make this decision. I can only take one day at a time and teach myself to LET THEM.

  • @KimberleyFerreira-g8f
    @KimberleyFerreira-g8f 9 дней назад +11

    I needed this especially on a day like this. Last night I was crying for hours because this year i’ve been rejected by two persons who I thought I had a connection with. I really felt alone in it all. But I’m so happy I did, I know it’s only recent but i feel like i’m starting to see clearly now.

  • @jacintaparris7210
    @jacintaparris7210 4 месяца назад +126

    Let people do what they WANT TO DO, so you’ll see what they’d rather do!

  • @misse39178
    @misse39178 Месяц назад +48

    “Do not automatically take the blame for things they have done.” 🙏🏽

  • @thaongocnguyen4088
    @thaongocnguyen4088 3 месяца назад +67

    she is teaching us how to be at peace

  • @bansaloni
    @bansaloni 9 дней назад +13

    Thank you! Really needed this at this time. Something about your voice and words is so calming and assuring. ♥

  • @quantumfineartsandfossils2152
    @quantumfineartsandfossils2152 4 месяца назад +137

    5:00 "You are the only one who has control of you" yes angel..

    • @Flx-zh8ze
      @Flx-zh8ze 4 месяца назад +6

      I read this comment right as she said it ❤

    • @Cheshirelass
      @Cheshirelass  4 месяца назад +9

      Hard for far too many people to recognise this, to accept this - and to use for their own good - and hopefully that of others too. D

    • @Cheshirelass
      @Cheshirelass  4 месяца назад +4

      @@Flx-zh8ze Take care. D

    • @rakenroljesus
      @rakenroljesus 4 месяца назад

      ​@@Flx-zh8zeSame thing happened to me

  • @goxothi
    @goxothi 4 месяца назад +147

    This video came up on my home page a few times and I ignored it, because at the time I didn't want to let go of this person. Today is the first day in over a month that I haven't thought about getting back together with him and I finally am watching this video. "They don't value you and you deserve to be valued and to be made to feel valued." Thank you Dee, for making me realise things.

  • @leoni17148
    @leoni17148 2 месяца назад +223

    I love when old people give younger ones advice. You know it’s coming from the heart and that they mean it.

    • @Cheshirelass
      @Cheshirelass  2 месяца назад +43

      Sadly, age doesn't always guarantee that. D

    • @LynLuu-sl1sc
      @LynLuu-sl1sc 2 месяца назад

      @@Cheshirelass age guarantees that he has had sex for years to become a good fit for our team as well as you wish to stay in touch with me as soon as possible so I can assure my wife is still available for me think about the past year to go back home and see what happens when I leave from the house to get some extra time to make sure that I have to take care of me as soon as I get home from the airport to get some food for my parents to come and visit us for dinner on the same day as usual so we can go out to eat and drink some beer for a little more clear about this but it will probably take care of a child that's been on his hands and his own beliefs are very passionate about their work with him in his life omg you know how much they mean to me to say what is happening with your life is that you will never see the end result in this case by being quieter with this but I think that is very true because I never thought of that you will never see it in the same place you like a cat dog who doesn't care about your mom's phone number for the job is to have such a wonderful time in the same

  • @buse-w8g
    @buse-w8g 5 дней назад +13

    I sincerely thank you. Although these words may seem ordinary for some, they can reach unattainable memories for some people. It felt good to hear that. I wish you a nice day.

    • @Cheshirelass
      @Cheshirelass  5 дней назад +1

      @buse-w8g I send wishes for the same to you.
      I am not touting for 'business' - but please do check out other videos of mine - you could find that there may be words that resonate in them. It would be good to have you around. D

  • @HollyHargreaves
    @HollyHargreaves 4 месяца назад +439

    I love finding older women on YT. It's comforting.🌟

    • @jewellove4797
      @jewellove4797 4 месяца назад +10

      Me too!!!

    • @likescookies
      @likescookies 3 месяца назад

      Yes! No annoying screaming, no long introductions, no promotions of something I don't need, just straight to the point. And her speech is so calm, so comforting, because there's no need to rush anywhere, she just wants to leave a genuine advise to future generations.

  • @kathrynschumann5254
    @kathrynschumann5254 4 месяца назад +351

    The rain added poignancy to the message i needed to hear. thank you

    • @Caareenkm6726
      @Caareenkm6726 4 месяца назад

      Except for that one non ending heavy drop you can consistently hear! But the gentle rain in background was nice! I actually listen to rain on utube to go to sleep! 🙂

    • @sxlxk3
      @sxlxk3 4 месяца назад

      @@Caareenkm6726ur very passionate about that raindrop💀💀

    • @sxlxk3
      @sxlxk3 4 месяца назад

      @@Caareenkm6726ur very passionate about that raindrop💀💀

  • @bestovvus
    @bestovvus 4 месяца назад +184

    One of the very few cases where the algorithm sends me love and light.
    You give, they give. You give some more, they chose to pull back; let yourself let them.

  • @Sawlger
    @Sawlger 17 дней назад +9

    I am tearing up. I lost my grandma when I was very little, and my mother whom I love dearly and cherish is not one for hearing your issues out and giving gentle advice. She's a tough love woman. She probably was raised that way by her own mother, that's how she knows to love. But hearing this from you so gently and hitting right home with all that's happening in my life right now... I'm tearing up.
    Thank you..

    • @Cheshirelass
      @Cheshirelass  17 дней назад

      Take care - good to have you around. Do check out more of my videos as they may be of help. D

  • @jacobhansen8424
    @jacobhansen8424 4 месяца назад +289

    Really needed this today. I hope life is treating those reading this well.

    • @CarlaCarly
      @CarlaCarly 4 месяца назад +2

      I also really needed to hear this so bad, just opened RUclips to distract from my thoughts and here it is, the exact words I needed. Life sometimes is magic

    • @alynarae3469
      @alynarae3469 4 месяца назад

      Same on both! ❤

    • @wendeogden1930
      @wendeogden1930 4 месяца назад

      This really hit me today. I needed to hear this. I'm going to play this to myself, and I will work on not letting others define my role in their lives. I'm so sick of it, and it hurts my spirit. Thank you.

  • @kirstenp3875
    @kirstenp3875 4 месяца назад +184

    As someone who got chronically ill due to covid, people really show their true colours when all of a sudden you can’t people please them anymore. So they turn their back on you. The grief is horrible. This video has done more for me then most therapy sessions. Thank you

    • @Cheshirelass
      @Cheshirelass  4 месяца назад +10

      Take care D

    • @maureendibari2384
      @maureendibari2384 4 месяца назад +4

      God loves you always

    • @aLightShines
      @aLightShines 4 месяца назад

      ❤️❤️❤️❤️🙏❤️☝️

    • @EmmeChatterton
      @EmmeChatterton 4 месяца назад +7

      You lose the things that weren't meant for you. This happened to me, people don't even remember or care how they abandoned you, years later they will say, oh we all wondered where you went, why did YOU disappear, how rude of you. They are not good people and never were, your life is fuller now with less dark matter.

    • @HL-qv3yd
      @HL-qv3yd 4 месяца назад +2

      Same here, I'm going through it now, devastating 😢

  • @AnimeMovement
    @AnimeMovement 4 месяца назад +83

    A very toxic person just came back into my life, and I’ve been struggling with it. It all came to a head last night, and then I woke up and this was in my feed. I’ve never heard of this lady, and I’ve never searched this topic on any social media. I feel like God just knew I needed to see it. Thank You, and thank you, Ms. Dee.

  • @contheastorga382
    @contheastorga382 Месяц назад +6

    I'm 15 years old and when my friends betrayed me, this video appeared. Thank you for teaching me to let them go. I needed to hear this 🤍