This Unhinged 90’s Movie Should Not Exist

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  • Опубликовано: 25 ноя 2022
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    Found a movie called The Kid With X-Ray Eyes and it's even worse than you can imagine. Sorry!
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Комментарии • 6 тыс.

  • @Live_Laugh_Loathe
    @Live_Laugh_Loathe Год назад +20488

    Kurtis appearing from nothingness is proof he mastered being a magician after all these years

    • @ashfeather3349
      @ashfeather3349 Год назад +85

      the real magician he brought to all his shows was himself all along🙏

    • @kimbleryan7150
      @kimbleryan7150 Год назад +19

      @Bully peter it isn't this is all you've posted in the comments

    • @believeinmatter
      @believeinmatter Год назад +38

      @Кurtis Соnner 🅥 reported. Ya’ll are really desperate

    • @yelpforhelp
      @yelpforhelp Год назад +24

      he has mastered the art of fushigi

    • @batjackattack5556
      @batjackattack5556 Год назад +32

      @Кurtis Соnner 🅥 omg kirtis it’s really u omg!!!!!!

  • @SalmonOfK84
    @SalmonOfK84 Год назад +2709

    If I had a nickel for every time a Malcolm in the Middle actor ogled someone using x-ray goggles, I'd have two nickels. Which isn't a lot, but it's weird it happened twice.

    • @fefe4373
      @fefe4373 Год назад +8

      lolll

    • @citrusune
      @citrusune Год назад +8

      doof

    • @ps1hagridoufofcharacter
      @ps1hagridoufofcharacter Год назад +8

      whats the second time it happened? can't say i have a good memory for this kind of thing
      edit: oop nvm i got to that part of the video

    • @andsiriisstupidyes4118
      @andsiriisstupidyes4118 Год назад +25

      If I had a nickel for every time someone made an unoriginal joke like this, I’d have two nickels, which isn’t a lot but it’s weird it happened twice. Who am I kidding? I’d be a freaking billionaire.

    • @may6v6
      @may6v6 Год назад +110

      @@andsiriisstupidyes4118 stay mad doofenshmirtz rules

  • @randomasshumanbeing2078
    @randomasshumanbeing2078 Год назад +1660

    The whole reason why chuck and the lifeguard got together was because they knew chuck and the officer were meant for each other, and this is the 1990’s, so they wouldn’t allow that.

    • @calowenby1654
      @calowenby1654 Год назад +49

      That’s a really good theory, actually.

    • @gayjayy
      @gayjayy Год назад +120

      They all have an agreement for Chuck and the officer to have a secret relationship and the lifeguard will be Chuck's "beard".

    • @randomasshumanbeing2078
      @randomasshumanbeing2078 Год назад +41

      @@gayjayy YES, that’s exactly what. Only legends know this truth.

    • @brockastill3622
      @brockastill3622 7 месяцев назад +2

      are you sure???

  • @pinecone189
    @pinecone189 Год назад +765

    10:55 I love that this implies that a homeless man should stop at like $10 like my dude doesn't even have a wallet to keep his money in

    • @-psilo-9071
      @-psilo-9071 7 месяцев назад +50

      He's just storing his money that's probably all the money he owes whats the issue 😅

    • @clairem6748
      @clairem6748 3 месяца назад +13

      Fr and we all know how profitable begging on the street is

    • @ShuhPond
      @ShuhPond 2 дня назад

      @@clairem6748some panhandlers can actually make up to $300k a year

  • @multishipperbish8465
    @multishipperbish8465 Год назад +3808

    clearly chuck kept up his beach treasure-digging lifestyle so he could see the cop and further drive their romance plot

    • @user-qs3qf5lw9k
      @user-qs3qf5lw9k Год назад +210

      That'd be a much better plot, good on you.

    • @vaishnavisingh9244
      @vaishnavisingh9244 Год назад +109

      I was thinking it the whole time IT'S A CLASSIC TROUPE

    • @sagapulastation1711
      @sagapulastation1711 Год назад +103

      Do you think theyve ever explored each others bodies on the beach

    • @iamaddictedtoacnhpleasehelp
      @iamaddictedtoacnhpleasehelp Год назад +53

      @@sagapulastation1711 yes they have isnt it obvious

    • @itiswhatitismindset
      @itiswhatitismindset Год назад +1

      @@sagapulastation1711 um why do you ask why do you need to know do you think that why 😟

  • @tangear
    @tangear Год назад +4861

    I honestly was more invested in the knife and hamburger skit than the scenes of the movie. The premise was much more promising.

    • @rx500android
      @rx500android Год назад +21

      Same💀💀

    • @AidanRahder
      @AidanRahder Год назад +61

      Watching it my brain really said “Woah this is a very funny concept I want to make a short film with this plot” “wait no that would be plagiarism”

    • @magicman2881
      @magicman2881 Год назад +34

      @@AidanRahder just change the burger to a sandwich

    • @TheOnlyCaprisun
      @TheOnlyCaprisun Год назад +11

      Seriously, the movie was just that bad that the skit Kurtis made was better, it’s kinda funny in a sense, lmao

    • @icyboi3227
      @icyboi3227 Год назад

      I was fucking dying

  • @roseepunk
    @roseepunk Год назад +805

    Kurtis being friends with Freddie Dredd is like when a character from your favourite TV show makes a cameo in your other favourite TV show

    • @sayo1133
      @sayo1133 10 месяцев назад +50

      i literally still cannot believe that's real it jus came outa nowhere

    • @user-vd9ji6lk6z
      @user-vd9ji6lk6z 9 месяцев назад

      thats exactly how it is with this movie, justin berfield as reese from malcolm in the middle and this kid from this dumbass movie

    • @user-vd9ji6lk6z
      @user-vd9ji6lk6z 9 месяцев назад +5

      hes my favorite actor and character

    • @danielladuck3323
      @danielladuck3323 9 месяцев назад +3

      ⁠@@mohamedzayan706”Kurtis Conner and Freddie Dredd in the same RUclips video, what is this a-“

    • @AvaFaust
      @AvaFaust 7 месяцев назад +1

      FR

  • @Nojintt
    @Nojintt Год назад +385

    11:00 Great lesson for children: people asking for help are just greedy liars.

  • @treedeerthethingy4812
    @treedeerthethingy4812 Год назад +21056

    Kurtis calling the beach cop a pig and then immediately turning around and shipping him with the other guy is funnier than anything in this entire movie

    • @Name-lq4hz
      @Name-lq4hz Год назад +261

      @yes bruh y r there so many bots in the comment section

    • @Nosebleed47692
      @Nosebleed47692 Год назад +655

      And just like that 300 fanfics on ao3 have spontaneously materialised

    • @Miriam-pq4vx
      @Miriam-pq4vx Год назад +216

      hes so me actually

    • @treedeerthethingy4812
      @treedeerthethingy4812 Год назад +336

      @@Nosebleed47692 I honestly wouldn't be surprised if those start popping up, there's a fic for literally every pairing possible. And if there isn't, there will be.

    • @N_IRL
      @N_IRL Год назад +111

      The most Kurtis thing he's ever done

  • @crickis
    @crickis Год назад +3912

    i love when kurtis says "back to the movie" sounding as if he also just had to watch the random demented sketch with us

    • @zodiAAAHHH
      @zodiAAAHHH Год назад +104

      same i can imagine him just pausing for a few seconds in silence after he knows that's where he's gonna put the skit then saying that like something happened 😭😭

    • @megarat1777
      @megarat1777 Год назад +8

      He did bruh in his mind

    • @triangularsphere
      @triangularsphere Год назад +6

      Why would you make me think of this

  • @Berd
    @Berd Год назад +691

    kurtis doesnt know about the pig beach in the bahamas

    • @chipsonthemenu
      @chipsonthemenu 9 месяцев назад +24

      berd what are you doing here

    • @CationIonn
      @CationIonn 5 месяцев назад +16

      My oh my do my own eyes deceive me? It appears a member of biological class Aves in Linnaean taxonomy has decided to make their presence clear in this segment of a recorded video reserved primarily for remarks regarding said broadcast. To this I say, welcome my fellow brethren! I sincerely hope you find your stay here most pleasurable.

    • @tranzient
      @tranzient 2 месяца назад

      @@CationIonn that's crazy

  • @jordanne229
    @jordanne229 Год назад +631

    the sucker-burger sketch is legitimately the best one you've ever done, the plot twist was great and fantastically underscored by the editing, it's honestly true art
    also loved the jacob cameo!

    • @jesper_and_the_juice
      @jesper_and_the_juice 11 месяцев назад +7

      i came to the comment section to say this too!!

    • @user-jt5rd8hi8s
      @user-jt5rd8hi8s 8 месяцев назад +5

      Unrelated but we have the same pfp 😜

    • @captainnugget7216
      @captainnugget7216 5 месяцев назад +1

      ​@@user-jt5rd8hi8salso unrelated but the two of you no longer have the same pfp

    • @user-jt5rd8hi8s
      @user-jt5rd8hi8s 4 месяца назад +4

      @@captainnugget7216 idk what you're seeing but on my screen we still have the same pfo but who knows 🤷🏾‍♀️

  • @rzmnzs5662
    @rzmnzs5662 Год назад +2860

    the coolest spy gadget was definitely the microwave that could turn those little packets into a hamburger in 1 second

    • @j.m3850
      @j.m3850 Год назад +78

      I used to want one of those so much

    • @s_h_o_o_b_y
      @s_h_o_o_b_y Год назад +45

      that’s all i was thinking about when he was listing gadgets

    • @s_h_o_o_b_y
      @s_h_o_o_b_y Год назад +11

      makes me think of phil of the future’s food spray cans

    • @deathsheadhawkmoths
      @deathsheadhawkmoths Год назад +10

      i was obsessed with that thing

    • @Spooky_l3xxi
      @Spooky_l3xxi Год назад +9

      LITERALLY!! I remember I used to open and close kitchen cabinets to see if it worked lmaoo

  • @jenathan76
    @jenathan76 Год назад +3440

    The most amusing thing about this 'movie' is that the cars are literally different makes, models, and even colors from shot to shot. It's like they went out of their way to have zero continuity.

    • @tinyandtired
      @tinyandtired Год назад +7

      Uncle Chuck's shirt also magically changes colour when he grows titties.

    • @spacetrashfallingdown
      @spacetrashfallingdown Год назад +64

      @@Boing2699 it's a bot. I've just seen another account post the very same comment

    • @allysonhocter9898
      @allysonhocter9898 Год назад +17

      On top of that their clothing changes from shot to shot too

    • @mousemalone9462
      @mousemalone9462 Год назад +18

      Don't worry about it man it's just a new spy car feature

    • @ilexdiapason
      @ilexdiapason Год назад +4

      @@Boing2699 just report for spam

  • @koelee
    @koelee 11 месяцев назад +102

    6:50 I can imagine this movie suddenly taking a very dark turn, where instead of finding some cool x-ray goggles, Bobby instead finds the dismembered body of a murder victim in the suitcase

    • @thenobodys1955
      @thenobodys1955 13 дней назад +1

      "omg... I wonder what could be in this suitcase uncle!"
      opens suitcase
      *"AAAAAAAAAAA-"*

  • @prungojumpty
    @prungojumpty Год назад +404

    kurtis wasn’t holding back this video, calling out drake for being a creep and the police for racial profiling within minutes of each other dhdhhdjd

    • @farted4606
      @farted4606 2 месяца назад

      CINNASNAIL FROM BUGSNAX

  • @joaopedrocypriano3069
    @joaopedrocypriano3069 Год назад +16495

    I wish someone would compile all “I hardly know her” jokes kurtis ever said in one video

  • @sydsymptoms
    @sydsymptoms Год назад +4232

    'I think it's time for our secret agent, "we cant let the bad guys take us alive" pills'.. what a line

    • @MadAliceInWonderland
      @MadAliceInWonderland Год назад +274

      They're kid friendly cyanide pills 👀

    • @quandaredevil
      @quandaredevil Год назад +228

      @@MadAliceInWonderland cyanide flintstones gummies

    • @Random-sk6hm
      @Random-sk6hm Год назад +64

      Sugar-free cyanide candy, now with extra flavour!

    • @eddihurta7173
      @eddihurta7173 Год назад +24

      I went the green apple cyanide Loli pop 🍏

    • @bag.n
      @bag.n Год назад +25

      The predecessor of unalive

  • @eyespliced
    @eyespliced Год назад +191

    And the twist is that this entire movie was a lucid/fever/day dream Reese was having in a random filler episode of malcom in the middle.

  • @thequeenofcringe1585
    @thequeenofcringe1585 Год назад +426

    The Dream jokes and then calling the goggles “goggies” was a MISTAKE Kurtis. You have summoned a beast and it’s only a matter of time before it arrives on your doorstep

  • @mikey_m114
    @mikey_m114 Год назад +5488

    the thumbnail alone leaves me both terrified and intrigued. Kurtis is so brave for sitting through these movies for our entertainment 😔✊🏽

    • @Pine_apple
      @Pine_apple Год назад +16

      why the and the are spam the and reply comment or yes??

    • @brspringer
      @brspringer Год назад +24

      @@Pine_apple Make this make sense

    • @Pine_apple
      @Pine_apple Год назад +3

      @@brspringer what the and rhyme

    • @notcomfortable_here
      @notcomfortable_here Год назад +35

      this entire comment section is painful to read

    • @EclipseINF
      @EclipseINF Год назад +6

      @@notcomfortable_here comment and the what section and

  • @vespertineblue
    @vespertineblue Год назад +947

    The expression on Kurtis' face after "just fucking kiss already for me!" is the one of a man who just learned something new about himself.

    • @thatpaigeperson9877
      @thatpaigeperson9877 Год назад +2

      @Deadpool. eh shut up ya damn bot

    • @LoLo1k2k3k
      @LoLo1k2k3k Год назад +71

      IM GLAD SOMEONE ELSE NOTICED FHSKFJSJKAJD

    • @crappy-doodle3894
      @crappy-doodle3894 Год назад +25

      Surprised by the words that came out of his own mouth😂

  • @4077Disc
    @4077Disc Год назад +456

    There are actually 4 kids in Malcolm in the Middle. The oldest one is late high school/college age and away from home, but he still exists, Kurtis.
    Sheesh

    • @Sirdeathvids
      @Sirdeathvids Год назад +34

      5 if you count Jamie

    • @medianoche7276
      @medianoche7276 Год назад +5

      Then he's not a kid is he?

    • @xiphactinusaudax1045
      @xiphactinusaudax1045 Год назад +12

      @@medianoche7276 He is because he's a child and also there's actually 5
      but if he meant just the ones still in the house there's 2

    • @zubetp
      @zubetp Год назад +36

      francis erasure

    • @gayjayy
      @gayjayy Год назад +12

      @@medianoche7276 In a sense, yes and no. Yes, he's still his parents kid. No, he's technically a late teen/early adult.

  • @kawaiidragons7732
    @kawaiidragons7732 Год назад +86

    15:33
    You can't just show a full on film and say "back to the movie" 😭

  • @kirawebster6583
    @kirawebster6583 Год назад +842

    cannot believe "Stamper? I hardly know her" wasn't uttered a single time

    • @sabahk
      @sabahk Год назад +48

      check the description tho 😎

    • @candiiboo
      @candiiboo Год назад

      I waited for it LMAO

  • @sh4rky466
    @sh4rky466 Год назад +1878

    I like to imagine that in the Kurtis skitematic universe, everyone looks, sounds, and acts like Kurtis. Even the newborns.

    • @alliexcx5576
      @alliexcx5576 Год назад +1

      Even the animals and the food look like him 😭

    • @airinmacdonald3979
      @airinmacdonald3979 Год назад +21

      Do they smell like kurtis too?

    • @sh4rky466
      @sh4rky466 Год назад +10

      @@airinmacdonald3979 yes

    • @airinmacdonald3979
      @airinmacdonald3979 Год назад +4

      @@sh4rky466 well now it's a prefect universe

    • @ImaPizzaK
      @ImaPizzaK Год назад +4

      KSU and Jermaverse crossover

  • @melcorrigan7905
    @melcorrigan7905 Год назад +37

    I work in film editing and fun fact the beach "dubbing" is actually called ADR (Automated Dialogue Replacement) and we do it for at least one scene or line in every film. Its very common on outdoor scenes like that. Also the sound editing is not done until after the picture editing is done, so its likely the jump cut was put in there before the ADR because of the actor fucking up a line or something. Dialogue editors edit to the already "locked cut" of the movie and they wouldn't have been able to send it back to the editor to fix the picture to match the voice recording.

    • @melcorrigan7905
      @melcorrigan7905 Год назад +14

      Its also in the actors contract that they must make themselves available to record ADR once the sound editing starts. Hopefully this all doesn't sound pretentious i love your vids its just cool to provide some insight to the long complicated and sometimes dumb process of completing a film

  • @Babypinkprincess
    @Babypinkprincess Год назад +35

    Not them adding the pillow in his shirt AND having him wear a different color shirt. No continuity. 😭 22:20

  • @Coffee-Dere
    @Coffee-Dere Год назад +3605

    Kurtis laughing at his own joke gives me so much dopamine I cannot

    • @BootyTickleingBandit
      @BootyTickleingBandit Год назад +26

      Bro the amount of energy the bots created in the comment section is not comfortable 💀

    • @cybergutz
      @cybergutz Год назад +2

      @@BootyTickleingBandit fr😰

    • @charcoal9145
      @charcoal9145 Год назад

      N nnnkjnlnb b bbbnn n n n bbnnnbnnbbbnbnn nbbnbnnnbbbnbnbnbbbknnbbnbnbnnbknbnbnnbnnbnbnbnbnbnbnnnnnnnnnbnnnbnnnknbnbknnbnnnnnnnnnbnnnbnnnnnnnbnnbnbnnnnnnnnnnnnnnbnnnnnnnbnnnnn kbjlbbnbkbnbnnbnbknbnbnbnbnnbbnbnbnbnbnnnbknbnnbnbnbknbnbnbknbknnbbnbknbkbbnbknbkn bnbnbnbnn bnbn bnbnbnbbn nbnbnnnbnnnbnbnbnbbnbnnbnbbnbnbnn nbnbnbnbnn bc n bbbb​m bbbbn,b, m m m m ,m m, m,

    • @pvic6959
      @pvic6959 Год назад +1

      same i also get so much dopamine that i can knot

    • @jacobeddings2108
      @jacobeddings2108 Год назад +2

      you can't what

  • @kay-dc8495
    @kay-dc8495 Год назад +2982

    The cars changing models and colours in every shot is the most outrageously hilarious thing I've ever witnessed

    • @subparnaturedocumentary
      @subparnaturedocumentary Год назад +22

      an altima to a bmw

    • @aldranzam3456
      @aldranzam3456 Год назад +117

      I loved the scene where the shelf falls only hitting his foot, but on the next shot he's stuck under it with huge bazongas- art-

    • @booba1710
      @booba1710 Год назад +55

      @@aldranzam3456 he is also wearing two different shirts in the shots

    • @cringeneer5490
      @cringeneer5490 Год назад +23

      It's probably because Stamper crushed all of the cars

    • @aspenrose_
      @aspenrose_ Год назад +11

      @@booba1710 must have needed a bigger size to accommodate the dobonhonkeros, and they couldnt find one in the same color

  • @socialgutbrain7774
    @socialgutbrain7774 Год назад +99

    The chase scene was absolutely delightful. That shit sounded like I was in build mode in the Sims

  • @HowMany_Monkeys
    @HowMany_Monkeys Год назад +33

    14:21 - I really wanted the empty chair to slowly turn around to reveal a second “SUCKER!” sign 😂

  • @marimh2844
    @marimh2844 Год назад +1635

    when i was in 2nd grade i was so obsessed with spy kids that i used to tell my classmates that my parents were secret spies and show them my fold-up binoculars. it was my entire personality and also i got pick-pocketted twice

    • @urbasichamilfan
      @urbasichamilfan Год назад +97

      I was the same way, only I convinced my classmates I had pepper spray (it was just spray hand sanitizer) and a bunch of cool gadgets that made me a spy. I doubt anyone believed me but it sure as hell was fun

    • @Rebrandedbitch
      @Rebrandedbitch Год назад +23

      I'm surprised that I never did stuff like that as a kid tbh-

    • @finmiles965
      @finmiles965 Год назад +47

      Oh dude you’re not alone, funnily enough I decided to prove it by learning to lockpick and pickpocket...
      I didn’t take any binoculars though, feel like that would have been breaking the spy kid code

    • @paadoxal
      @paadoxal Год назад +20

      someone stole my lock-picking set at school🥲

    • @alyssastewart738
      @alyssastewart738 Год назад +23

      That’s fine I had a friend in 5th grade who would not give up claiming that she was Hannah montana and secretly went home and went off to do Hannah Montana stuff and then came back home for school tbe next day. I’d always be like stfu and she just kept going with it how was she not embarrassed

  • @BungaloHippo
    @BungaloHippo Год назад +4911

    the brain cancer bit with sitcom special guest wooping and cheering when jacob is introduced with the cheering gettin louder and louder and the last zoom in with jacob saying fuck you almost unintelligibly under the loud cheering really cracked me the fuck up. ahh kurtis and his crew of hilarious friends! love them

    • @pokaay3163
      @pokaay3163 Год назад +60

      He just keeps making shit that is funny I have no idea how he does it

    • @lillyhaun4959
      @lillyhaun4959 Год назад +21

      Literally my favorite shit ever

    • @cwill2127
      @cwill2127 Год назад +17

      Honestly that was so funny I lost it. So is brain cancer

  • @JohnnyTromboner
    @JohnnyTromboner Год назад +42

    Fun fact: those black ops guys actually do have x-ray goggles. They just use millimeter wave scanners instead of x-rays and the images produced don't look very sexy at all

  • @differentbutsimilar7893
    @differentbutsimilar7893 Год назад +56

    I LOVE that scene with epic crash and him just casually crawling out of the sea unscathed, covered in seaweed, like he's a Terminator... ONLY to pivot to doing a relaxed hair flip and staring placidly off towards the horizon, as if he was thinking "Geez. I've gotta be more careful." Y'know, like you or I might think after almost tripping over slight rise in the sidewalk. Just kind of a weird day for him, I guess. We could all learn some lessons in taking things in stride from him.
    He's a certified badass for that. What an absolute dude. That's the most graceful recovery I have ever seen in my life. That man has 9 lives. One time, my cat slipped off of a little jut 15 feet up in the living room wall and she took it about as well as this man. I don't think even she knew or cared that she just fell 15 feet. Just carried right on like nothin happened. You yourself would think she planned it that way.

  • @s_h_o_o_b_y
    @s_h_o_o_b_y Год назад +1814

    fun fact: in the 30’s there were beach cops who had tape measurers and would make sure women’s bathing suits weren’t shorter than 5 inches above the knee

    • @everything5066
      @everything5066 Год назад +334

      bruh . I'm surprised how women survived so much misogyny holy crap

    • @caidalee1994
      @caidalee1994 Год назад +182

      And if they were, they were arrested. 🙂

    • @pigeonatic
      @pigeonatic Год назад +115

      wow! that sure was a fun fact

    • @asackboyplush6508
      @asackboyplush6508 Год назад +58

      That's not fun that sucks

    • @Rebrandedbitch
      @Rebrandedbitch Год назад +67

      @@asackboyplush6508 I think they were being sarcastic yo

  • @idk5491
    @idk5491 Год назад +614

    Isn’t so cool that x ray glasses make women naked and men literal skeletons😍

    • @Arania_3.14
      @Arania_3.14 Год назад +163

      That's cause women have booby bones, duh

    • @cornybram845
      @cornybram845 Год назад +53

      Pretty sure there where different levels at which you could adjust the goggles, which explains why Bobby just saw through to skin sometimes (which didn't only happen with women, eg. the fake homeless man) while at other points all the way to bone

    • @hippieduck
      @hippieduck Год назад +11

      Uh that's actually because all our soft tissue got bonified when we were made from a rib from some dude or something just don't question it OK

    • @averylarson8139
      @averylarson8139 Год назад +10

      women have exoskeletons DUHHH

    • @SheepUndefined
      @SheepUndefined Год назад +2

      @@cornybram845 Watsonian and Doylist explanations, man. Having an in-world explanation doesn't always change things

  • @artyb27
    @artyb27 Год назад +57

    The twist in the burger skit is better than any twist I've seen in a movie in many years.

  • @dannhhh
    @dannhhh Год назад +34

    17:27 love the jarvis johnson merch!!

  • @kaliathealphamale
    @kaliathealphamale Год назад +3551

    That Black Sea joke was way outta pocket💀💀

    • @itiswhatitismindset
      @itiswhatitismindset Год назад +358

      AND THE PIGS ONE LIKE IT CAUGHT ME OFF GUARD

    • @blizzard_the_seal9863
      @blizzard_the_seal9863 Год назад +293

      @@itiswhatitismindsetHE MAKES ACAB JOKES ALL THE TIME ITS GREAT, HE REALLY JUST DROPS “👮‍♂️=🐷” OUTTA NOWHERE

    • @itiswhatitismindset
      @itiswhatitismindset Год назад +155

      @@blizzard_the_seal9863 IKR BUT I REALLY WASN'T EXPECTING IT THIS TIME OML LOVE HIM

    • @blizzard_the_seal9863
      @blizzard_the_seal9863 Год назад +75

      @@itiswhatitismindset YEAH THATS FAIR WAHHSBSNABSW IT RLY DID HIT YA OUT OF NOWHERE ☠️☠️☠️

    • @valkyriecatt
      @valkyriecatt Год назад +57

      I was in shock for a second tbh

  • @stephanybeachler
    @stephanybeachler Год назад +3703

    ok. I have to say this.... the "Sucker......Burger" storyline sucked me in, it had everything I needed in a story, surprise, deceit, plot twist, suspense and best of all horror, what else would you call it when you sit down to eat a burget and its gone "POOF!" you should be nominated for an emmy and an Oscar!!! VERY WELL DONE DESERVES A like

    • @mferreiraluiza
      @mferreiraluiza Год назад +92

      burger? I hardly know her

    • @eggoopy
      @eggoopy Год назад +29

      I love burget

    • @Swan862
      @Swan862 Год назад +70

      Sucker burger? Isn't that the guy that made facebook

    • @firirk4150
      @firirk4150 Год назад +2

      You wanna see the rest of the comment?
      Sucker!

    • @KissyAdair
      @KissyAdair Год назад +6

      I laughed so hard. This is why I watch every video Kurtis drops. He's hilarious.

  • @parkerkay1695
    @parkerkay1695 Год назад +60

    The Millie Bobby Brown bit killed me had me rolling on the floor 😂

  • @MyNameIsOclock
    @MyNameIsOclock Год назад +24

    "A homeless man with cash???? This guy doesn't need any more money"

  • @madison42069
    @madison42069 Год назад +1648

    Like every x-ray technology in movies, sometimes you see through the skin to bones and sometimes you just see through clothes. Sacrifice continuity for those artfully crafted perv scenes!

    • @TheDGomezzi
      @TheDGomezzi Год назад +205

      To be fair to the movie, it did seem like there was a dial where you could adjust how powerful it was

    • @tinnagigja3723
      @tinnagigja3723 Год назад +45

      And sometimes you see through gun metal.

    • @mykes7239
      @mykes7239 Год назад +40

      yeah like seeing through sand?? Don't think so

    • @Boing2699
      @Boing2699 Год назад +19

      @@bullypeterspamming links isn’t going to make people enjoy your content

    • @matthewpitre8159
      @matthewpitre8159 Год назад +20

      Yeah and you can see through sand to go beachcombing but you can't see through walls and not everybody's naked doesn't make much sense does it.

  • @mihaelajoe8291
    @mihaelajoe8291 Год назад +3508

    Who else hopes that Kurtis will keep the "yeah" like he kept the "balls" sound?

    • @Raven-wq4li
      @Raven-wq4li Год назад +209

      i also hope he keeps using the car going off the cliff clip

    • @KingOfGaymes
      @KingOfGaymes Год назад +27

      He will I believe in him

    • @GoodKidmAAdLizard
      @GoodKidmAAdLizard Год назад +17

      yeah.

    • @gronkskonk
      @gronkskonk 10 месяцев назад +10

      @@mohamedzayan706 he uses it in most of his videos, & it came from his barbies vs brats video 😋

    • @Raggy_df
      @Raggy_df 9 месяцев назад +7

      ​@@gronkskonkI remember that. And the moaning weasel.
      B A L L Z

  • @beepboop9750
    @beepboop9750 Год назад +57

    “Now that’s what I call a boner” made me giggle a disturbing amount.

  • @hungryhedgehog4201
    @hungryhedgehog4201 Год назад +17

    I love how the first usages for the X Ray goggles are: Making money, means testing and no consensual voyeurism. Really says a lot about the people who made this.

  • @katemurrayy
    @katemurrayy Год назад +2108

    kurtis i just gotta tell you this is genuinely such a good video. like the drake jokes, stamper driving, JACOB MAKING A CAMEO? being a married man maxed out your comedy skills. welcome back man!!!!!

    • @danacornish8598
      @danacornish8598 Год назад +38

      Jacob in the Jarvis Johnson merch? I love to see it

    • @anomalousanimates
      @anomalousanimates Год назад

      ^^scam

    • @danacornish8598
      @danacornish8598 Год назад +2

      @@anomalousanimates Report the comment

    • @Darkawk
      @Darkawk Год назад +10

      Kurtis's videos are legit more entertaining than 95% of Netflix no cap

    • @anomalousanimates
      @anomalousanimates Год назад +1

      @@danacornish8598 ok, also remind me when the scam comment is gone so i can delete my comment

  • @jaspertheghostkid
    @jaspertheghostkid Год назад +35

    Where can I get the Bigfoot shirt he’s wearing at 8:29 because it’s my favorite thing ever

  • @nellenbacher
    @nellenbacher Год назад +31

    @17:55 I thought the boss was going to be really upset he had lego hair

  • @husyay1008
    @husyay1008 Год назад +2670

    the reason the cia agent is so terrible at driving is because the actor was possessed by the spirit of Cosmo and the people making the movie didn't wanna try and redo the scenes

  • @REPLA_ACE
    @REPLA_ACE Год назад +1536

    *I love when Kurtis said "It's spyin' time!" and spied all over the movie. Truly one of the videos of all time.*

    • @REPLA_ACE
      @REPLA_ACE Год назад +5

      @leaked footage My dad didn't left me 🤨🤨

    • @REPLA_ACE
      @REPLA_ACE Год назад +27

      @I'll say when it's time *Self aware bot*

    • @artifice4723
      @artifice4723 Год назад +21

      How are all of these bots

    • @Snarl_Marx
      @Snarl_Marx Год назад +1

      Please let this meme die. Have you no decency? No shame?

    • @toasty_tonsty
      @toasty_tonsty Год назад +13

      When he spied all over was the best part

  • @Jezzleyjezz
    @Jezzleyjezz 8 месяцев назад +11

    Chuck stays on the beach so he can spend more time with Patterson 🥺

  • @quitetheshroomyboi
    @quitetheshroomyboi 8 месяцев назад +18

    15:03 "officers, get him!"
    *"aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa"*

  • @jacobpelkey8534
    @jacobpelkey8534 Год назад +545

    10:55 love how the movie frames this as a kid exposing a villain lmao. "You already have a couple hundred bucks on you!" Even assuming that roll of ones is a couple hundred dollars (I kind of doubt it), homeless people are obviously going to be keeping their money on them because you need an address to open a bank account. A couple hundred dollars still isn't enough to live on, especially when you have no income, health insurance, shelter, etc.

    • @mastermarkus5307
      @mastermarkus5307 Год назад +112

      Good point.
      My initial thought was that it was crazy for the kid to jump to "MAYBE THIS GUY IS RUNNING A SCAM" when it didn't seem like the guy did anything suspicious.

    • @grantmegan91
      @grantmegan91 Год назад +128

      @@mastermarkus5307 right!! Like wait a minute!! Before u give this homeless man 45 cents, let me make sure he doesn't already have a few dollars on him already!!
      So weird

    • @RizkyeZaki
      @RizkyeZaki Год назад

      ruclips.net/video/FvgSwI9DWXo/видео.html

    • @becauseimafan
      @becauseimafan Год назад +1

      Agreed, and thanks for the timestamp too!

  • @wasteland.baby.
    @wasteland.baby. Год назад +925

    fun fact: kurtis is the only man with a mustache and a mullet that i will ever trust

    • @kaicenat2015murder
      @kaicenat2015murder Год назад +8

      why do you people hate guys with mullets so much? I've seen 3 comments saying pretty much the same thing

    • @amoureux6502
      @amoureux6502 Год назад +5

      Ty Turner

    • @kichukmenon
      @kichukmenon Год назад +1

      What about jesus lmao

    • @wasteland.baby.
      @wasteland.baby. Год назад +19

      @@kichukmenon jesus had neither of those things 🤨 he had long hair and a beard not a mullet and a mustache

    • @everything5066
      @everything5066 Год назад +1

      same

  • @sovietbot6708
    @sovietbot6708 Год назад +10

    When I was a kid, I got a spy kit. I couldn't remember everything in it. But I remembered edible paper, markers with edible ink, and a camera disguised as a juice box.

  • @dominique_joly
    @dominique_joly Год назад +27

    Kurtis' "Sucker" bit alone is WAY better than this whole movie could even *try* to be! 😆

  • @gabsvb_
    @gabsvb_ Год назад +2415

    a movie commentary was just what i needed to get through the rest of the year

    • @DrpshpdCatShirt
      @DrpshpdCatShirt Год назад +5

      @Кurtis Соnner 🅥 Yeah, that is not the link to Never Gonna Give You Up.

    • @ellifsyaa
      @ellifsyaa Год назад +1

      Same I needed this commentary video so much otherwise I would have spontaneously combusted dee- no but seriously it’s funny

    • @UsagiMay
      @UsagiMay Год назад +2

      I cannot believe there's only one more month until this year is finally over. And then we have to pray that everything just dies down and it's not as crazy as the last 3 years

  • @MaddyBlu9724
    @MaddyBlu9724 Год назад +348

    Kind of amazing how much this movie didnt explore what you might be able to do with xray goggles. Their first and last idea was "peek at boobies hehe"

    • @cornybram845
      @cornybram845 Год назад +9

      And to detect metal on beaches

    • @snakewithapen5489
      @snakewithapen5489 Год назад +21

      Reading this comment, the very first thing that came to mind was seeing androids or aliens masquerading as humans, which I think would instantly make for a much more interesting plot

    • @Mario_Angel_Medina
      @Mario_Angel_Medina Год назад +10

      And even then the movie has very few X-ray vision scenes. For the most part the goggles are just a mcguffin... it makes me wonder if the script wasn't originally for a raunchy sex comedy and somehow became a PG film along the way (that would explain why it has Griffin Drew and Brinke Stevens in small roles)

    • @somewhat_human
      @somewhat_human Год назад +1

      Honestly... id do the same thing

    • @cornybram845
      @cornybram845 Год назад

      @@somewhat_human ...That's not a good look on you

  • @jennifertorres4743
    @jennifertorres4743 Год назад +13

    kurtis' face when he said "i just drove my car off a cliff have you seen my suitcase?" has me DYING oh my god. comedic genius

  • @Cyndaqueer
    @Cyndaqueer Год назад +80

    How tf does Kurtis just drop that he’s friends with Freddie Dredd

  • @vvdubz
    @vvdubz Год назад +1569

    Glad to see Kurtis is back with those fever dream skits

    • @koiifsh
      @koiifsh Год назад +6

      watching this at 3 am is not making this any better for me

    • @ck7993
      @ck7993 Год назад +15

      @Seeing Star so glad you owned the bots by... botting comments that clog up comments even more?
      your intelligence amazes me

    • @slaughtertothelamb
      @slaughtertothelamb Год назад

      fr

    • @lulu7.765
      @lulu7.765 Год назад +5

      Did...did you just said D-Dream 🤤?

  • @thecharliezone
    @thecharliezone Год назад +3157

    kurtis is one of the only guys ever who can rock a mullet

    • @aghhh77
      @aghhh77 Год назад +11

      and me 😩😩😩😩

    • @SimonVanliew26
      @SimonVanliew26 Год назад +25

      There is 100,000 people that live in Seattle and Portland that look exactly like this mans.

    • @3089io
      @3089io Год назад +64

      Everyone can rock a mullet. Try harder.

    • @sillysillyarchive
      @sillysillyarchive Год назад +1

      REAL

    • @sillysillyarchive
      @sillysillyarchive Год назад +2

      @@aghhh77 no

  • @chloehepperle5886
    @chloehepperle5886 Год назад +25

    One thing you can always depend on in life is Kurtis leaving absolutely nothing to your imagination😌

  • @eatatjoes6751
    @eatatjoes6751 Год назад +11

    This movie feels like a movie that Matt, Lizzie's little brother, would have to watch as a creative punishment for missed homework.

  • @taylorlawrence3570
    @taylorlawrence3570 Год назад +962

    I used to stare at this movie at the Hollywood Video when I was growing up, but never dared try to get my parents to rent it for me. So thank you Kurtis for finally showing me what it was all about.

  • @thapelosishi
    @thapelosishi Год назад +593

    Totally Spies! had THE best spy gear. They were so unapologetically girly eg. Compact mirror computer, a laser nail file, 5 carat data processor pendant, barrette tracking device, like??? So cool😭

    • @svenbengtsson9753
      @svenbengtsson9753 Год назад +5

      Omg riiight

    • @ddjsoyenby
      @ddjsoyenby Год назад +43

      that show is amazing........and awakened us all in many ways.

    • @ktyy777
      @ktyy777 Год назад +56

      they released Happy Meals with the Totally Spies gadgets and best believe I tried to get every single one

    • @rx500android
      @rx500android Год назад +1

      Omg yesss

    • @rumis.dollsss.15
      @rumis.dollsss.15 Год назад +1

      Yaassss

  • @bluebeka2458
    @bluebeka2458 11 месяцев назад +12

    16:52 That man has the driving skills of Spongebob. 😂

  • @ShinySahil
    @ShinySahil Год назад +14

    12:13 freddie dredd huh? ain’t that the “this is what is like to be known as dead” guy?

    • @Cottagecoreshnail
      @Cottagecoreshnail 9 месяцев назад +1

      it is. he just casually dropped that bombshell on us. What a madlad

  • @lemondropdoodles17
    @lemondropdoodles17 Год назад +529

    That bit with Jacob absolutely killed me! I knew it was coming and I still died 💀💀😂😂

  • @malmfao
    @malmfao Год назад +1213

    the way I KNEW where this was going when he said that their depiction of the terrorist was crazy 💀

    • @alia582
      @alia582 Год назад +117

      BRO SAME I WAS JUST BRACING MYSELF

    • @LadyOfTheNight_
      @LadyOfTheNight_ Год назад +105

      I just kept saying to myself "SURLEY they won’t do it, it’s such a dead joke" well yeah.. what was I expecting tbh

    • @malmfao
      @malmfao Год назад +16

      @@alia582 struggle is real

    • @Peastable
      @Peastable Год назад +86

      Isn’t this pre-9/11 too?

    • @ericaploof998
      @ericaploof998 Год назад +7

      It's giving...Angels and Demons. 💀

  • @BrakCartmanLIKES
    @BrakCartmanLIKES Год назад +18

    10:20 funny I thought the joke was going to be that he would still be a garbage man b/c he's passionate about trash.

  • @aileenmorgan8276
    @aileenmorgan8276 Год назад +13

    I totally remember renting this movie as a kid. Another weird and wild 90s kids movie I rented from that same shop that might be fun to cover is "The Wiz Kid". It's about a kid who makes a cooler clone of himself, and he also has a robot and plays a sick harmonica solo near the end. It took me forever to remember the name!

  • @primordialsoup8685
    @primordialsoup8685 Год назад +2354

    kurtis posting is like an oracle to me. no matter what if he posts it’s gonna be a good day. spring is coming early this year

    • @gouldiloof
      @gouldiloof Год назад +3

      Next year

    • @SomeRandoDum
      @SomeRandoDum Год назад +7

      @Кurtis Соnner 🅥 why did I fall for this

    • @donovanfaust3227
      @donovanfaust3227 Год назад +4

      We skipping winter this year

    • @HuntressWizard
      @HuntressWizard Год назад +1

      I feel thid

    • @Lucia-ct2sj
      @Lucia-ct2sj Год назад

      Same, and also I watch whenever he posts no matter what time it is or if I'm busy. Kurtis os worth it

  • @uberrdriverr7969
    @uberrdriverr7969 Год назад +448

    If I had a dollar for every time Kurtis made an “I hardly know her” joke, I would throw all that money in the dumpster
    Uh oh what have I done… these replies…

  • @_Y875
    @_Y875 Год назад +24

    12:30 theory: this is the fetish of someone who had a hand in the creation of both properties

  • @carolfromhr9900
    @carolfromhr9900 Год назад +327

    The “burger time” skit is one of your best yet. The cross cutting, color correction, and slow motion had me dying.

    • @theodour8617
      @theodour8617 Год назад +1

      Who are you writing to, Carol?

  • @nicolechaney6114
    @nicolechaney6114 Год назад +1373

    Kurtis is more loyal to HelloFresh than many men are to their wives

    • @Frick8375
      @Frick8375 Год назад +4

      LOL

    • @ukrainiansturgeon8561
      @ukrainiansturgeon8561 Год назад +8

      Accurate the other way around as well. A lot of people are unfaithful.

    • @bm-ww8kb
      @bm-ww8kb Год назад +115

      @@ukrainiansturgeon8561 oof. you really couldnt leave this comment section without throwing in a #notallmen eh lol

    • @Pain_Ito
      @Pain_Ito Год назад

      @@bm-ww8kbit’s not #notallmen you dumbo it’s #wamencheattoo

    • @bolillo5013
      @bolillo5013 10 месяцев назад +2

      Read this as he started the ad 💀

  • @ratlily21
    @ratlily21 4 месяца назад +5

    The real reason chuck decided to stay at the beach despite being filthy rich was because that's the only way he could see the officer everyday and they were meant for each other and they should kiss

  • @halffirewolf
    @halffirewolf 8 месяцев назад +9

    the skits that Kurtis writes are genuinely the best part of every video, god

  • @annanaydenova8321
    @annanaydenova8321 Год назад +700

    Okay, I did a little research cause I wanted to find out who the kid on the second poster was. Although I didn't find any info on that, I did find out that the two production companies that worked on this movie (Concorde- New Horizons and Royal Oaks Entertainment Inc.) both have mostly produced soft core erotica thriller type movies, with names like "Women In Cages", "The Erotic Misadventures of the Invisible Man" "Sorceress II: The Temptress". So it's definitely super weird they made a kids movie. But it does contextualizes the naked scenes. LOL

    • @moonchild3370
      @moonchild3370 Год назад +116

      thank u for ur research anna! you could just be lying to me but i’ll trust you regardless

    • @pandamandimax
      @pandamandimax Год назад +4

      @moon child What a weird response? Hush

    • @moonchild3370
      @moonchild3370 Год назад +45

      @@pandamandimax ? it was just a little jokey joke?

    • @ilovebeastboy28
      @ilovebeastboy28 Год назад +36

      @@pandamandimax what a weird response? Hush

    • @rainy8702
      @rainy8702 Год назад +16

      @@pandamandimax What a weird response?
      Hush

  • @hugoenzo2444
    @hugoenzo2444 Год назад +1584

    Kurtis and his editors just in time to cure my seasonal depression.

    • @taratih
      @taratih Год назад +47

      Wait i though kurtis edits his. Videos

    • @velv3ts
      @velv3ts Год назад +8

      @@taratih its etheir just him or him and others editing

    • @sfmainey
      @sfmainey Год назад +36

      he actually edits them himself! That's why he includes those "me editing" clips :D There might possibly be more but I'm pretty sure it's all him

    • @Grace-er9ep
      @Grace-er9ep Год назад +7

      Seasonal depression hits hard but a Kurtis skit hits harder

    • @PhoenixRoseYT
      @PhoenixRoseYT Год назад +8

      That’s literally why I clicked this video. I felt the depression starting to come over me and ran here lol

  • @HappyCynic
    @HappyCynic Год назад +31

    They may have changed the title in the UK because there was an album released by a band called Babylon Zoo in the 90s called The Boy with the X-ray Eyes.

  • @user-mh8gn8yy7n
    @user-mh8gn8yy7n 7 месяцев назад +2

    Whenever a movie has a scene in a beach, most of the time it's actually recorded again after the shootings, because lines from different clips won't match due to the wind and waves.

  • @garaj1
    @garaj1 Год назад +755

    So I have a weird memory associated with this movie. Back when i saw it as a kid in the early 2000s my dad once walked into the room, looked at the screen, said that Chuck was played by the same actor as "that stupid guy in that time travelling movie" and walked out. This all happened in maybe 15 seconds.
    It wasn't until many years later that i realized my dad absolutely sucks at identifying people and confused Robert Carradine with Keanu Reeves

    • @70sman
      @70sman Год назад +227

      >walks in
      >confuses Robert Carradine with Keanu Reeves
      >refuses to elaborate
      >leaves

    • @amityislandchum
      @amityislandchum Год назад +14

      I'm guessing your dad was a bit too young to have grown up watching Revenge of the Nerds? It came out in 1984. That's what Robert Carradine is best known for by the older generations.

    • @garaj1
      @garaj1 Год назад +19

      @@amityislandchum Nope, he was in his 20s when Revenge of the Nerds came out and knew about it, though i can't say if he saw it. Regardless, he literally just sucks at telling people apart.

    • @koiifsh
      @koiifsh Год назад

      @@garaj1 maybe he has face blindness?

    • @aeddiefarmer
      @aeddiefarmer 3 месяца назад +1

      I relate to your dad so much as I have the same problem! My siblings used to laugh at me when we were watching TV, I'd be convinced I recognised an actor and be like 'isn't that the person who was so-and-so in such-and-such?' And they'd be like...no! 😂 I always felt so proud of myself at first for 'recognising' them!

  • @spinspin1597
    @spinspin1597 Год назад +353

    Kurtis casually dropping the fact that he's friends with Freddie Dredd is insane lol

    • @lorymichelle4838
      @lorymichelle4838 Год назад +25

      Right I was looking for this comment lol

    • @Just.jolie.
      @Just.jolie. Год назад +13

      I was about to comment the same thing!

    • @lozzc2496
      @lozzc2496 Год назад +8

      I don’t think a single person would guess that they were friends 😭 most random friendship

    • @1cattails
      @1cattails Год назад +4

      I know, right!? But honestly I'm not all that surprised lol they'd be good friends

    • @scurvyfigs3698
      @scurvyfigs3698 Год назад +7

      all canadians know each other

  • @MarielleVL
    @MarielleVL Год назад +16

    22:00 nahhh😭😭😭

  • @jankounchained4211
    @jankounchained4211 Год назад +7

    That “just a dream” bit was hilarious lol

  • @shrexygal9104
    @shrexygal9104 Год назад +424

    i am soooo here for the enemies-to-lovers storyline for the cop & the uncle

  • @matejakristo3726
    @matejakristo3726 Год назад +67

    23:26 "I'm really sorry aboot that" that is the first time I actually heard his Canadian accent lol

  • @Sonic_BoomFPV
    @Sonic_BoomFPV Год назад +6

    Harry Stamper? Like Bruce Willis' character in Armageddon? Couldn't even be bothered to name their own characters for this masterpiece? 👍

  • @azizaaman4290
    @azizaaman4290 Год назад +15

    6:54 that story was so crazy to me cause i had been to that beach

  • @n3r3sh77
    @n3r3sh77 Год назад +124

    I like how instead of editing it out when he fails to say a word, Kurtis always just goes "Huhhh??" at himself.

  • @Jmmmmama
    @Jmmmmama Год назад +344

    Watching 3 year old KC videos and then stumbling on a new vid is wild. It’s like seeing him reach his final form. As an 80’s dad.

  • @radiclelife
    @radiclelife Год назад +16

    19:32 lmaoooo

  • @orxalowe
    @orxalowe Год назад +12

    4:14 this can actually happen when you overestimate a turning. it happened to my mother; she overestimated a turning on her way home from work and lost control of the wheel. she ended up crashing into a tree, then bouncing off into a hedge. shes alive and physically well, though she didnt go flying off a cliff... im not sure that part is realistic. also shes not a cia agent going round a giant bend, so perhaps my comment means nothing

  • @leopard-spots
    @leopard-spots Год назад +68

    19:43 is like danny and drew’s sketches where they do weird stuff to each other and then forget all of it and wanna make a video lol

  • @verycoolwhaleshark
    @verycoolwhaleshark Год назад +520

    as a british person, i can confirm that we are just an urban legend

    • @smsmsmsmsmsm
      @smsmsmsmsmsm Год назад +12

      The amount of bots… but yes as a fellow british person I agree we only exist in myth

    • @kieranfoulger9091
      @kieranfoulger9091 Год назад +9

      As a British person I'd like to say we do exist, but only when no one is looking at us

    • @Nobody-wc2qi
      @Nobody-wc2qi Год назад +1

      @@kieranfoulger9091 Dr Who reference?🤔😅

    • @Toxxicrat
      @Toxxicrat Год назад +2

      The UK is a social experiment