Signs Someone Is Not Interested In You
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- Опубликовано: 9 апр 2023
- Have you ever found yourself feeling confused about someone's behavior towards you? Do you suspect that they might be in love with someone else, but you're not sure? If so, this video is for you!
Our team has done extensive research and identified six common signs that indicate someone is in love, but not with you. We will discuss the behaviors and actions that suggest their heart is elsewhere. By the end of this video, you will have a better understanding of what to look out for and how to approach the situation. Whether you are looking to move on or just seeking clarity, this video will provide you with valuable insights to help you navigate your emotions and avoid one sided love.
DISCLAIMER: Keep in mind that this video is purely for informative and educational purposes.
We also made a video on how to deal with unrequited love: • How to Deal with Unreq...
Writer: Aditi Nambiar
Script editor: Caitlin McColl
Script manager: Kelly Soong
Voice Over :Amanda Silvera ( / amandasilvera )
Animator: AwesomeKickArt
Music & Sound Design: Gower Sun ( / @midnightcitymusic )
RUclips Manager: Cindy Cheong
References
Counseling & Psychology- South University. (2016, August 23). The Psychology Behind Love and Romance. South University. Retrieved from www.southuniversity.edu/news-and-blogs/2016/08/the-psychology-behind-love-and-romance-70700
Pannell, N. (2018, June 27). Body Language Signs That Someone Doesn't Like You. Insider. Retrieved from www.insider.com/body-language-signs-that-someone-doesnt-like-you-2018-6
Raypole, C., & Litner, J. (2021, October 14). How to Recognize a One-Sided Relationship and Restore the Balance. Healthline. Retrieved from www.healthline.com/health/relationships/one-sided-relationship
Schafer, J. (2016, July 28). 5 Nonverbal Clues That Someone Is Interested in You. Psychology Today. Retrieved from www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/let-their-words-do-the-talking/201607/5-nonverbal-clues-someone-is-interested-in-you
The University of Texas. (n.d.). How Much of Communication Is Nonverbal? | UT Permian Basin Online. UT Permian Basin's Online Degree Programs. Retrieved from online.utpb.edu/about-us/articles/communication/how-much-of-communication-is-nonverbal/
I've learned: When in doubt, they don't like you
And even worse, they just don’t know you well enough to understand different characteristics.
all fun and games until your the person who doubts all of your relationships.
If you have to ponder this enough to watch this video. They ain't the one lol
I'm always in doubt though... oh wait, nobody has actually ever liked me so that does make sense
when in doubt, they like your brother/sister
First sign:your watching this video
So true
my what
No
You caught me
...
They will never love me
Damn that sucks bro. I might have to agree with you.
Dang
This bout to be the beginning of ur villain arc😭
But what if they will?
honestly same🙁🙁
ive tried so hard for them and done so much but theyll always run back to another person
This is so accurate, I can confirm it feels horrible when you realize someone is leading you on.
I think people who do that are just doing it because they find cruel sick pleasure out of leading someone they don't really give a damn about.
He led me on for months, emotionally abusive in the end 😅
Agree..I wish this video came out earlier....A girl I've known for a long time and recently came to like was showing lots of good signals and I know she never does this unless she actually liked me. Long story short, after going for a couple of dates which I personally felt were good, she suddenly decided to avoid me and has since stopped messaging me. Really hurts and still confuses me as to whether was it something I did or said wrong? I got tired of trying to pursue because it all became one sided.....
@@JozantoSA Sounds like she wants a guy that doesn't really put her as a priority.
I've always found that young women who are very fickle, find guys who are the bad boys irresistible.
I'm not saying any normal dude out there should ever change their tune to try to match what some women want.
Those weird emotional roller coasters and attitudes these chicks have is crap that should've been left behind in high school. And I know any guy out there does not want to be the dude who a girl needs a shoulder to cry on when she can't get with the guy she wants to get with. Other times we'll just be the backup option. If I were you stay strong and stay stoic in the face of a breakup.
@@JozantoSA I had that same experience. Date going well, then avoidance and silence.
IMO these girls talk to their best friends who in turn talk her out of liking you/me/him.
I think it’s because during the dates, they judge from the perspective of emotion, but when they talk to their friend, their friend explains based on logic what she thinks about us and suddenly all the sympathy and connection we’ve worked for, all the magic, evaporates.
When you think you've finally find someone who you can love, only to realize it's nothing more than a shallow friendship where you're the one you have to be the active one to maintain it...
Pain 😢
Sad but true
That’s actually true.
Its relatable, TnT
Or they turn out to be toxic and it turns out they're just using you 😭😢
I've always lived by the philosophy that if their energy doesn't match my energy, it's not worth pursuing. Thanks for a great video!
My farts are better than Psych2Go’s farts
@@p-__ spamming much there every other comment? 😂
Good one...
what do you mean by energy matching?
Felt this recently when a girl was interested in me, I respect that, but I almost couldn't feel the vibe with her, like there was almost zero things we have in common, different preferences and/or style. Definitely not worth pursuing.
After 26 years of life. I've had my first friendship with a girl. This was the first time a girl actually noticed me, so obviously I got waaay to excited. First I thought she liked me back but she checked all the boxes mentioned in this video. Needless to say it was all in my head and to her I was just another friend. I was devastated when I found out. Nevertheless, it opened my eyes to the possibility that I can be likable, and that girls can notice me. Now I'm trying to learn how to be social so that I can meet more girls who potentially will like me back. It's a long way to go but I'm excited to be finally walking it.
When you found out what?
u can do it bud!
You are going to be great, but honey you have to get out of your own way first. Just believe in yourself, be kind, positive, smile, and all good things will follow.
@@mr.atheist8848 "and to her I was just another friend"
Same
It's so painful and self destructive to experience all of these signs yet still hang on to the slightest hope that it might happen. We do a lot of damage to ourselves than that person does to us.
Absolutely lechehabi
been hanging on for eight years now… been shown every bad sign like in this video and some really fucked extra signs like him asking me how he should tell who i thought was my best friend that he wants to be physical with her but not be in love…. and i actually gave him advice. like a pure idiot. then he’s been detailing his ‘physical’ encounters to me, knowing im 12 hours away in different states so i dont have a fair shot to be with him again like these random girls who have him coming over and doing shit like that… it’s so cruel. i wanted to puke reading it. i don’t even know what to do at this point. you’ve held on for so long, you just don’t want to let go when it might still happen after all these years.
The worst is when it happens over and over, yet never actually works out. You can only keep trying for so long when all you get is negative results. Not to mention that most of the results described in this video are far better than the results I get. I mean, her actually replying to my texts, spending time with me or bothering to give me excuses? I can only dream of getting that level of recognition.
"Know that you deserve the best when it comes to being loved and cared for" Hits to the SPOT 💪🤘
Agree
bruh i barely deserve being loved and cared for at all tf makes you think i can afford the first class cabin
Yeah, but that's like saying you deserve to drive a Ferrari when you work at McDonalds, are in massive debt, and owe the mafia incredible sums of money.
I can relate to this big time. There is a girl at my work that I really liked that I have a lot in common with. We even went to the same high school and ended up moving to the same town working together at the same job. I was really enjoying getting to know her and building a friendship. She always laughs at my jokes and greets me and even asked to go out to lunch with me one day. Just recently though, my boss helped hook her up with another guy who she apparently has really liked for a long time, but was too shy to pursue him. This came as a huge shock to me, as I had no idea and I really thought that she liked me as much as I liked her. This really broke me and sent me into a depression for a good week. Anyway, the lesson I learned is not to get too emotionally attached to someone before even knowing if they feel the same way about you. I decided not to tell her how I feel though because we still work together, and it would make it very awkward.
Have you tried confessing your feelings to her before she got into this relationship?
Good that you didn't tell her, because it would be awkward. Having the same school doesn't make much difference. It would make more difference if you both like the same activities, or sports. But who knows. You live and you learn. Actually it is better not to date at work, because once you break up then things do get awkward.
I am sure you will find somone who likes you back, as much as you like them. The older you get the slower you proceed, which might save you all the dissapointment because you see the red flags clearer. On the bright sight the guy might be a jerk, and not someone who she expected. If you make her laugh , that is a great thing, and when she breaks up with the other guy, you can ask her for a date. But then again, do as you please, because I might be completely wrong.
thanks bro, passing through the same here, any more advices?
I know this is tough to ask yourself but you also need to consider if they’re actually leading you on or they’re just being nice. When you are talking about friends from work etc, they’re usually just being nice because you’re a colleague and they’re not expecting you to be obsessed with them. I’m very relaxed and open with my work team but I’m not romantically interested in any of them. I freely go for lunch with any one of them because I’m simply not expecting colleagues to get the wrong idea. Please remember that friendship is a terrible terrible strategy with someone you’re romantically interested in.
@@jaybee4288 Very true. I don't want to even go for drinks or lunches with people, because they get something in their heads immediately, and I don't want anything else but friendship. On the other hand once guys realize that you just want to be friends they ghost you, because now you are waste of time to them. I would like to be just friends with guys, but it doesn't seem possible, at least for me.
The anxiety you sometimes feel is an opportunity...
...to pause
...to sit with it
...to look towards it with kindness and curiosity
...to discover something it’s been meaning to tell you
Whenever tension finds you, know that it comes with an invitation to rest on your Fabulous path. Sit with the feeling and offer it kindness, knowing the earth can support you. Treat yourself with compassion, even, and especially, if anxiety is present.
I think this is a really good way of thinking about it. Sometimes our brain wIll tell us things, and because we may live in denial without admitting to it, we may think it's something that invokes anxiety. Primarily in overthinking things, which is more likely overthinking that your actually overthinking. I think looking at the facts and logic of the situation also helps perceive the situation better, thinking of it objectively and making sure to not be afraid to admit to yourself that in actual reality it's them because they aren't interested in you, but perhaps that they aren't communicating that.
Thank you ❤
Another motivation for most of these ideas could be that the person of interest is simply afraid to progress a relationship for a number of reasons, be it lack of experience, fear of rejection, fear of losing friendship, etc. It isn't always because of someone else. To keep this short, whoever it may be might actually like you back, but maybe they're afraid to make it clear. People and their love for one another are not as predictable as we think. But it's always good to give things like this a second thought. For whatever reason, if anyone takes my spiel into consideration, feel free to add to/challenge it.
Usually not. Sure it’s possible but most of the time they’re just not really into you. They’re usually not leading you on either, at least not intentionally. Modern men tend to think if we smile at them we’re interested and available.
@@jaybee4288 That could be true as well. There are other sides to this little idea I haven't considered either. Thanks for bringing it up!
I think really the best course of action is to confess your feelings and to communicate what you feel. Mainly because your not going to read their mind, and trying to see what others think of what they're thinking isn't going to help all that much. At that point, you just gotta accept the possibility of rejection because they actually aren't interested in you, but in the off-chance of what you're saying is true, then it would work out. Either way, I think confessing and then getting your answer helps you determine whether or not to continue.
@@TheDiscusserOriginal Real answers do give closure for real emotions. They're much better than living with mere speculations, well said!
@@TheDiscusserOriginal It usually works, but it depends on the person. Someone can try to leave you on the hook/string along when they agree on it. Even if you explicitly remind them to not do that and assure you, they'll still do it anyway. I had 2 situations when that happened, which literally wasted my time.
0:00: Intro
0:56: (They make) Excuses
2:18: (The relationship is) One-Sided
3:14: (They are) Breadcrumbing
4:13: (Their body language demonstrates) Indifference
5:45: (You are their) Personal Therapist
6:44: (They are) Always Preoccupied
8:10: Outro
My farts are better than Psych2Go’s farts
Wow thank you so much. I really appreciate this.
4:59 CRAIG
Yup
@@p-__ wtf
I thought she liked me…
This hit me hard. Though it’s not about my crush or romantic feelings for someone, it also applies to my friend. I’m experiencing all of this with her. She claims I’m her bff but whenever we’re together, I feel like she’s so distant. There was also one time we had plan to go out then suddenly she cancels it. The next thing I know she hang out with someone new on the day we planned to go out. It’s not the same how it was before she met someone. Things have changed and all I can do is to accept it.
It’s happening to me at the moment as well, started off good mates… hitting it off instantly, then I started seeing someone and things started to change. She started saying no to hanging out and became distant and standoffish with me. I was told i was the ‘backup’ but I never got any indication this was the case, so I gained a significant other but (at least for the moment) feel that I have lost a friend.
So I have been watching a lot of these to figure out what happened and what (if anything) I can do about this. 😅 think things are getting worse between us … wondering what I can do about it. It’s hard and I feel a little hurt and miss my mate.
Same. I used to think that she is my best friend but it turned out that she was not . She used to give me distance vibe and only using me so I decided to maintain distance from her as well. She was like why I'm not close to her like I used to be but I told her that there is nothing serious and remain as her classmate only.
I've dealt with this once or twice . . . and I really hope I've never done this to someone else.
That's my worst fear
I unknowingly hurt someone ;like how I am getting hurt this time
I have experienced this before a few times, so can understand the feeling. When someone I'm not interested in starts to do things for me that normal friends or acquaintances won't do, I immediately put a stop to it, cause I don't want them to think I'm leading them on.
This happened to me. There was this girl who was constantly saying things like: How haven't you got a girlfriend? You look so good! Etc. I thought she wanted something from me, since she was so happy to see me, so close to me. She even visited me after my surgery. Then I took action, I started flirting (even a stupid person would notice I like her). She was flirting a little too. One time we were in a pub with our friends, and I felt just bad, really bad. She was cold to me. We were discussing some activities, and when I tried to make an appointment she said: ,,Yeah, we can do it sometime." And suddenly a guy appeared out of nowhere, and I heard a rumor that she kissed him. And yeah, I left and never contacted her ever again. She hasn't contacted me since. Sorry, but I don't have sometime in my schedule.
Sorry, for this big comment, but it was good to let it out
Edit: grammar
Ah the good old "you are too good to be single but not good enough for me". If someone makes a remark on your relationship status (or rather lack there of), you can freely assume they are not interested in you romantically and at best have a platonic interest in you. Nothing wrong with that, just helps to read the signals straight away so you don't lose time and energy needlessly.
@@mrgalaxy396 Yeah, that's nice to know
Good that you stopped reaching out to her. Best to walk away with pride, my friend! Know your worth!
I feel you bro😢
Maybe she was interested but you acted too late? Maybe she came to a conclusion you didn't like her the same as she did. Or maybe she thought she liked you, until she met someone else and fell in love. You cannot choose your feelings...it might change overnight.
Most of this applies to regular friendships as well
Indeed. I no longer have any need for friends because friendship causes pain, its loving and its laughter are in vain.
Even toxic family members.
A good piece of advice I've tried to live by, at least for me, is to assume all girls are not interested in you. From there you can only be pleasantly surprised when one turns out to be interested. Helps keep expectations in check, especially when any kind of relationship is in the early stages.
Honestly most of my life I’ve dealt with people like this before and I realized I’m not meant for love. I hope you all find that beautiful connection with someone and stick with them. ❤️ love and peace to all.
Thanks and you will find that person too
Everybody is meant for Love . We just have to wait patiently and Pray too. God will lead us because we can mess it up. But He sees an knows All.
Hey r you ok? I feel the same as you, but i know how depressing it can be to come to terms with. I dont think most people get it. But regardless, we can still have friends, and life has other meanings :) im starting to see that i too am destined to be alone though. Idk how to totally accept it, do you? I want to find another way to deal with that "lonely" feeling, and to stop having useless , painful "crushes" on people......
@@IdislikeTechnology I think that doing nice things for yourself. Being busy with doing good things for yourself. Work on your dreams. Occupy your life with friends, hobbies, vacation, your own business etc.
It's all rng based
I used to think this girl was into me because she would always chat and greet me whenever we see each other, but turns out she just did it because I was always by myself in college classes. This semester, she has stopped talking or even greeted me even if I tried to greet her because she has a boyfriend. I respect her wishes but this blows, you know? Now I'm back to being lonely again.
It hurts sometimes
I feel you bro
Yeah, that is ruff. It hurts when others feel bad so they feel like they are obligated to hang out or do something with you because they feel bad. Oh I've had this happen so many times. You'll notice when it is different and by different I mean a little more than wanting to be friends. You'll know.
As a girl we can’t really win. If we’re nice to you because you’re alone then we’re ‘leading you on’. If we ignore you then we’re mean. Men need to learn how to set themselves up properly. If you are romantically interested you have to ask us out, not just stand there and wave hello every day and hope something changes.
Vis versa
I know this is tough to ask yourself but you also need to consider if they’re actually leading you on or you’re just hoping for more. When you are all talking about friends from work etc, they’re usually just being nice because you’re a colleague and they’re not expecting you to be obsessed with them.
As a psychology major, being the “personal therapist” hits me the hardest. This video has helped me realize how often I get led on and worse, used…
Feel bad for you pal ...
It actually feels so bad when everybody sees you as their confident ... It's a great "role" to have but it can be a huge burden too
Something I don't understand is, if it's obvious for them that you like them when they don't feel the same, then why do they try to seem interested in you? Why do they lie to you like that? It's time and energy consuming only to realize you were being toyed with, when they could have told you honestly they're not into you, being way less heartbreaking?
what i learned from being a people pleaser introvert is that once i started being straight forward, people actually appreciated it and didn't feel ghosted anymore. "i value our time together, but this is actually enough for me and more would make me feel uncomfortable. would you feel comfortable with this level of intimacy?" then we talk about it and boom! we only talk once in every three months yet nobody gets hurt because they know that i am just not interested in something more.
I've had some people who would show interest and then disappear, so i am extra careful with not doing that to anyone else.
"a healthy relationship requires active participation from both sides" i rly wish a friend of mine knew this ahhhh.. i want to give everyone the benefit of the doubt but it's starting to hurt
I had a girlfriend ive known since May 24th 2021. We got together on the 30th of that month. We were together till mid to late February of this year. Ive been more in a depressive state since. Ive always had the thought of us getting back together, so i never wanted to get with anyone since. She tried to be in a relationship with her ex boyfriend that she was still friends with (that i already knew) that lasted a week. A couple weeks later, she gets together with her other friend shes known for about a year or so. Hes actually really cool, and i think hes funnier than me, but idk if thats me being hard on myself. Anyways, ive been happy for them, but i still have feelings for her. Shes always been there for me, got me gifts, talked to me when i needed someone when i felt low, made me happy till i felt like i was at the top of the world. The only thing that ever ruined that, was (in my head) me. But maybe the other thing but one of the main reasons of why it didnt last forever (like we hoped) was that i was 2 hours and 30 minutes away from her. I was busy and im still busy with work. It was hard to physically see her. Still, i think of the good times and how the only birthday she was with me on was "The best birthday ever." (April 3rd 2022). I still think of it as being the best. Even to this day, im not with anyone, nor do i really wanna restart like i always did with knowing people like i knew her and how she knew me. I do hope that ill probably find happiness with someone, and maybe on a slight, slight, slight chance, maybe her. Idk for sure, but im dedicated. Idk if me being dedicated for that might be the wrong choice. Ill eventually come back to this if it does happen or if i find someone new.
(Thank you for reading this. It might be pretty long of a comment, but i felt like here mightve been a safe place to say it because there might be people like me with their experiences. Thank you again. Goodbye, goodmorning, good evening, and goodnight *Jim Carrey smile*)
❤❤
That's tough, I feel like it's wrong for her told hold onto you for that long when she's into someone else. You deserve better.
Hope you find happiness again dude
Hey brother, it is what it is.
I was with a girl for almost six years. She was everything, at the time. Three years in, we started having real bad issues and broke up maybe three times.
While I was training at Fort Lee, VA, she broke up with me in her heart and told me when I got back. During the time I was training, she completely deadlined our relationship. Every attempt I made to reach out or show affection was denied.
She ended it with me on Feb. 23rd. Over time, it gets easier. It's so easy to feel as though you will never be loved again. However, I've pulled through. I even met a great young woman and we're getting closer.
Keep your chin up. You are a beast. You are powerful. Be that. Surely all good will arise when you embrace what makes you rise and reject what makes you fall. Stay strong.
@@driftingtesticle3570 I really needed this... thanks a million
She'll never love me back
memories bring back
That’s what I’m thinking, but ima shoot my shot in the next couple of months
all the best
Literally worst feeling in the world for me 😆👍
Especially given that it feels like actual physical pain. It’s like a broke ribcage, you can’t see it but it’s agonizing every time you take a breath.
One of the not so good feelings is when you end up being the person who may contribute to their special friendships or relationship by simply trying to be the best you can be for them, only to see it was never reciprocated in the end even if genuinely care for them, as in turns out we were an option or convenience. Best thing i could advise is, be wary of being stringed along and keep an sense to know whats real and whats not. Best of wishes those meet someone who matches their efforts and energy.
You'll meet yours too.
@@SimplyKukua hope so one day, same for you and others
I am honestly sure that people who go through this know the truth but they just cant accept it. At least thats how I used to be. But let me tell you out of experience as soon as you start to show them the cold shoulder they will spam you with attention, however not in a "lets be together now" way, they just want things to go back as they were since they realise what they had because of the attention we gave them. It is always important to remember that YOU are not the problem, you are nit ugly or weird or anything, you are just a nice person who is being used by a selfish one. Those people want someone who love them so much that they dont have to respond to it
I usually go by the rule of thumb that if they breathe, they're not interested in me. I'm basically never wrong.
Normally I’d think you’re exaggerating, but I’ve also noticed it’s a great rule of thumb.
Most people are so preoccupied with what they want that they don't think of the other person. When somebody is friendly this doesn't mean they want a relationship. Also remember if you persist, they begin to see you as a creep. Leave them alone, stop trying to bump into them or having long drawn out chats when you meet. A friendship means that you give others space.
Timestamps
1). Excuses 0:56
2). One-sided 2:18
3). Breadcrumbing 3:14
4). Indifference 4:13
5). Personal therapist 5:44
6). Always preoccupied 6:44
Hope this helps you out. Hope you have a nice day. 💙💙💙💙💙💙
My farts are better than Psych2Go’s farts
Tysm! That rlly helped
@@ashethecutekitty3997 not a problem happy to help
@@p-__ okay
@@A55a551nit's a garbage cringe bot, ignore it.
Don't worry fellow brothers and sisters. There are people with better personas and beauty that care for you than them. My advice is - Stop tagging around them, move on and save your self esteem. You are worth more than how they treat you. All the best for your future!
I've had a couple experiences with this and it drove me into chronic depression. Like these were the moments in my life when my self-esteem was at an all time low. It perpetually felt like I was the NPC in a dating sim that got sidelined for a more attractive partner.
"Time is a treasure.
Yet so few...
Understand it's true value."
Basically they're friendzoning you without you knowing it💔
And its painful
Not even friendzoning in my case! They declare you their enemy and attack you. When they say “I love you” they’re really thinking about someone else and saying it about the person they’re thinking of and not to the person they’re talking to. Basically, it’s an extremely cruel way to play with someone else’s feelings because it gives them some sick thrill to have abusive power over that someone. Revealing that they “want my family and I dead” is a form of bullying according to my parents.
As someone who has dealt with being "friend zoned" my best advice would be to simply be honest with the other person and have a conversation. It clears the air, even if it's hard to talk about it, and if you don't get the response you want. For example, I really hit it off with this girl over the summer. She wanted to hang out with me one-on-one like 3 or 4 times a week. We have similar interests (outdoorsy stuff) and passions. Our personalities complement each other and we get along great. BUT, she's very bad at communicating over the phone. So much so that I decided to sit her down in person when I got the chance and ask her if she actually wanted to continue hanging out or if she was ignoring me. Obviously, I did this in a polite way, and she took it to heart and started responding to me and inviting me to things again. Well, I got the point the other day of wondering if she was truly interested in me or if she just wanted somebody to pal around with. Even though it was very uncomfortable, I had the conversation with her asking if she was actually interested in dating, or not... basically she told me that she does love hanging out with me, but that she talks to several other guys. She also said that she's had this conversation with several other guys... which hurt. And that's what I mean by, "you may not hear what you want to hear." But, she said that for me she would actually consider taking it further since I was so honest and caring in the way I asked her.
All that to say, even though it might hurt, if you're confused and not sure, just have the uncomfortable conversation. It may make you upset for a little while, but it will give you clarity on whether you should move on or keep trying. Don't give up!
Thank you ❤
Bad at communicating but talks to several other guys
@@mooseyman74 fair point, however, she can't seem to keep any guys in her life due to her communication problem... she's a spontanious in person "talk to other guys" type girl. SHe impresses people, they try to keep her around, and that's when the communication falls apart. And I don't only mean talking or texting, but communicating her intentions... needless to say, just like all the other guys, I walked away from her.
Had to learn this the hard way one too many times. Because they wanted money, my attention, time when they wanted etc but not me.
Last year, I had met a coworker and we started chatting and seeing each other frequently at work until it eventually led to us exchanging numbers and meeting up to hang out, I thought she was interesting as a person and a good friend at first because I was new to the area, but over time there was quite a few things we had in common and, I began to develop feelings for her over a course of months. She invited me to an amusement park and I met and talked with her parents, then a few month's later I invited her to a movie that we went and watched. Afterwards we talked for a little bit, I told her I liked her and she responded with saying that she doesn't want to date anyone right now, and I told her I understand. She said we can still be friends and I asked if this will make any of our future meet-ups awkward, and she said it shouldn't. I got nothing against her and respect her, but at the same time I felt really led on. We don't really text each other anymore and are conversations are brief every time we meet. This was last August. And since then I've tried my luck with two other women and was indirectly, yet obviously turned down. I'm 22 and going back to school so maybe my luck will improve, hopefully.
Don't be in _too_ much of a hurry to have a romantic relationship. These are your best years to do all kinds of other stuff you enjoy. Have fun
it'll happen.
This happened to me recently, and looking back at it now, while watching this video, it was painfully obvious what was going on back then. And it's amazing how every one of those items fits so well in my situation.
I just don't have the energy to do this anymore. It's too much of an emotional pain for me to handle and I don't think I can do this anymore
bro talk to me ab it,, vent to me i wanna make you feel better. howre you rn?
That’s it exactly , so right but they can also use you as their private punching bag at times dumping u and dumping their own owned bad feelings that have Nothing to do with you they text and ump on you their own bad feelings about someone dumping them> seems like karma for them they always use copycat and dump ppl !
Bro, I had a crush on this girl and she got with my best friend 😭
Relatable
Real
I completely relate to this video. When I was in high school, I had a crush on a girl who I thought had feelings for me. She hugged me all the time and we had some moments. But overtime, I realized she wasn’t talking to me as much and she had a boyfriend all along, which I didn’t know until then. I was upset and I heard a conversation that she admitted that didn’t really like like me. At one point, I stopped talking to her and blocked her from social media so I don’t have worrying anymore.
"Hey, I've seen this one!"
So you had a good friendship and you ghosted and blocked the person because they did not have romantic feelings for you? Mature.
What is it with people (especially guys) that the only goal to communicate with girls is to get romantically involved? You underline that you do not like their personality, just what they can do for you romantically. Ouch.
Forget the boyfriend part, it all happened to me too, mate...
@@davesmulders3931 no, mate, we the guys, when a girl gets unexpectedly close, think that they have some intentions. We never tend to ask them nor would like to know cuz our brains would normally set it into "She's into me" thing. But then, when she goes off-everything, nothing could be done and he only thing that remains would be the 'sweet' past with them and the miserable present... hope you get it..
@@DrakDoesClips69 Maybe the problem is that you think they are in to you when they get ‘close’. Depends on your definition of close as well. Hugging doesn’t mean anything. For many people kissing doesn’t even mean anything.
Besides that, someone might be a bit in to you, but that is no guarantee for the future. Maybe you didn’t respond well. Maybe they got to know you a bit better and did not like what they found. Or maybe they were just friendly and got spooked when they found out you had feelings for them. Stop expecting so much, it avoids a lot of disappointment.
What I find funny is that my male friends usually did these things to me but then, accused ME of leading them on for simply being nice when I'm not romantically interested in them. This shit gives me whiplashes.
Ik ! That’s why I don’t even have male friends anymore
It just broked my heart 🥺😭💔💔... Seriously I'm just a fool 😔😫.. I thought that we both love each other but now I understand I'm just nothing more than a toy to her, whom she can play for a while and then go away 😔😔... It's seriously heartbreaking💔💔.. I'm also a very idiot that i have given my every single time and care to her..... But it's just a game 😏😏😔😞...in today's world it is very hard to find true love❤ 😞😞... Now seriously I'm just puzzled how true love really looks like 😑😑😓
This definitely reminds me of a girl I was chasing. I dodged a bullet.
I already knew it, and still hurts.
Same TnT
It hurts more when deep down inside they actually hate you and they tell you they love you so it’ll hurt much more when they reveal their true feelings. My parents told me that it’s a form of bullying, especially when they downright attack you after finding out how they truly feel. Many girls did this to me despite being sick with cancer. Apparently being ill makes me less of a person, at least according to them. 💔
All these comments make me sad man. Cuz I’ve been down these exact scenarios so many times it’s just so played out. I come on RUclips and try to put my feelings out as much as I can cuz there’s no where else for me to go to be honest. That feeling where you put so much energy and effort into a person and they don’t even put the same amount back it really hurts.
I was in this spot about a month and a half ago, All my life no girl (my age) has ever showed me any sort of attention or held any sort of conversation with me, because naturally where i live they don't like the same things I like unless you're an oddball like me. But then later on i found a girl that plays the same game i do, so we added each other and we talked everyday, then eventually it got to the "i love you" part, as platonic, (but i took it as literal until later down) but me who has never had a singular woman my age never love me in my life and never having a girlfriend, i said i love you back, every single day i said that i always added something like "i deeply in love with you" i was literally the biggest down bad simp, and i was desperate for a relationship and to get a girlfriend for the simple fact that i could say i have one, then later on, she started talking to my friend more than she talked to me, because well he is just more entertaining to talk to, my life is nothing but boring, and i was jealous, i was annoyed that he was getting all of the attention, one time i nearly lashed out at him, but then i decided to be the better man and cooled down, and i told him up front that i was jealous, and he totally understood why, cus she first started talking to me, then i introduced her to my friend and they started talking more and more, and he 100% understood and i'm glad i didn't lash out at him. Then whilst we were talking, i asked myself why i even liked her in the first place i answered my own question "because she gives me attention" that's it, i thought i liked her this entire time, but i was just after her attention she used to give me every single day, after all she did tell me she loved me and me and my ignorant self took that with all seriousness and out of my desperation and me being eager to have a girlfriend, I lead myself down a path of lies in hopes that i can finally say that i have a girlfriend. Now i'm almost entirely over it, my friend and her still talk, me and her talk from time to time, i haven't told her i loved her since, because honestly now that I have been figuring out myself that I really don't even understand the concept "Love" entirely, but seeing everyone in relationships everyday, i was just jealous/envious of the people around me (and a bit horny) so i grew on me and i felt obligated to find a girlfriend now, or else i'll never get the chance to again, but after searching around (by searching i literally just went on reddit) i found out that it's completely normal to have never had a girlfriend in their life and their first girlfriend usually starts at like 18+ (i'm 16 atm) but where i live, relationships start as early as 13, so that even made me feel even more obligated, i'm incredibly weird, incredibly odd and shy/awkward around women, but i love socializing with people and them telling me what they enjoy. Anyways enough of my bible verse i decided to comment, I am now starting to figure out myself one step at a time, and to those people around me that are already in relationships that probably have their stuff figured out already (or are just horny) kudos to them! I now have to figure out what i want in a girlfriend and why i want one and understand this concept of "Love" entirely and no, i'm not asexual, i love women, i also have 0 interest in men either, i'm just your average heterosexual male, whoever decided to read this entire thing for whatever reason thank you very much. I want you to know that i appreciate your time, have an amazing day you guys and gals. Sayonara!
Edit: as of April 3rd im feeling a lot better. (Im still single) My friend and her are together now. Its been a bit rocky for him as its a lot of work/stress sometimes but atleast they are happy. They've had they're first times together and im happy for them! Albeit a bit jealous. One day i'll find someone who loves me for me and will accept all of it. Once more boys and gals. Sayonara 👋
That stuff will happen, I always found that someone who completes you is the best person, definitely find within yourself what you want from a relationship, I for one want companionship, someone to live my life with. The day will come when you find the right one.
@@koboldwizard Thanks
I read your entire text. Truly delightful to read. You and I are alike in some of the experiences we had. I also felt obligated to find a girlfriend when I was in high school (Im a uni boy now) just to say that I had a girlfriend to whoever asked me whether I had one. Apparently, this is just a challenge of becoming a grown-up man in our lives. Btw, those couple that you see around you are probably horny. I decided that I should first get rid of my problems, and then find a ''girlfriend'' or a wife in the future, because I can't put up with stupid dramas neither at my age (20) nor the living conditions here in my country. I had always thought that finding a girlfriend would always solve my problems and fix my feelings (Im a guy who is full of hatred and hate towards everybody). In reality, this was just a illusion of my primitive-self. I wish I never had such unnecessary dramas about getting/having a girlfriend and etc. I can socialize with girls/women around me, but relationships are harder than they seem. If a relationship is bound to have weak links between you and your gf, then that relationship is just a joke, easy to break and disappear. Thus we see some couples marrying and divorcing in less than a year or even a month, because they most probably got horny and wanted to have some sex for a while, and then they got bored with each other, lol. On the other hand, some gen Z girls are a bit ruthless about ''leading you on'' to a point where you think that she likes you, and then betraying you by either showing you signs that she got a bf, or that she just makes fun of you in front of everyone. It is advised whom you talk to and check what kind of people are around you. I have a feeling that gen Z girls will make some things harder than they used to be, and that that will probably ruin even the healthy relationships I fear.
@@koboldwizard I like how you put it that way. The someone that completes you is the best person to be with. However, that will slowly turn into a utopic dream in the not-so-far future. Gen Z girls are a bit more rude (or let's say harsh) about relationships, or that they are more relentless and ruthless about destroying healthy relationships, whether the relationships the links of which are weak as string or strong as steel. If a woman is willing to object my idea, that's fine, because I'm not targeting likes of her. Any woman should know what type of women I'm targeting here, and unfortunately, they are increasing in number every day. I hope that new generation of teachers will find a way to solve this indirectly. 👀
@@true-dark-mind9681 As it stands it seems like she's breadcruming me but i already lost all feelings anyways so it doesn't matter anymore, i'm just going to wait and find the right one. Thanks for the comment, and yes i know a guy that is currently in a polyamorous relationship at my age, and me personally i believe that it is going to end terribly but hey if they are happy they can go for it.
This is a really good video for me. I’ve been lead on by a few girls at my school and I was always the backup or the therapist when nobody else was around. It’s a shit feeling when you realize what’s going. If you’re going through this, it’s not your fault. It’s just indecisive people who don’t take into consideration other people’s feelings. Stay strong and keep moving forward.
Yes me too. He told me he might be able to meet me during holiday, if his friend not meeting him. This is shit, as I thought meeting is first come first serve. He is telling me I mean nothing to him as compare to other good friends.
I have had liked someone in 6th grade and genuinely thought she liked me back so I confessed and she said she liked me too but it turns out that my feelings have been played as she was dating someone else. I felt so heartbroken that I stopped pursuing love for anyone until 8th grade where I liked someone who I knew since 5th grade. Turns out they only liked me as a friend. It was a kick that knocked me off and felt that I would stop chasing for someone because first of all I wanted someone who understands me. So now I’m just a person who withdraws from conversations in big groups.
Why do I relate so much to this? As a High Schooler, I wasn't the talkative type. I became uninvolved with people and had a shy personality. I had crushes, but I would always self doubt myself, to say I'm not good for them. Now that I'm college, I've started to become open with myself, I've started to communicate at times, while still having a shy personality at times. But every time I see a girl I like at my school, I'd go up to them, and try to get to know the person without making embarrassing gestures.
I try to keep it slow, and rather tell if I have a crush, I would push myself to show it. But sometimes that backfires, as well, the girl I've been crushing had been dating for 2 years. I also tell myself that there are many single women out there, looking for a man who really understands how a woman feels. If that moment can come in my life, I would be eternally grateful.
Most likely their already in a relationship.
You will find somebody to love, and one day will be so happy to get rid if them finally. But for that you need a lot of time. We do go through stages of life and you are at that stage of opening. Best of luck to you. I have been there too. Hugs.
Someone who shares interest really sees you as an equal person and holds that your ability whether weaker or greater is trustworthy enough to believe entirely with security
How do you guys know what's going on in my life? This is quite literally, everything that is happening with my crush/old friend/whatever you want to call us. I know she's busy all the time, but even a little more engagement or enthusiasm would be nice. 😔
People who really want to spend time with you will find time in their schedule. Otherwise you are just another acquaintance they enjoy spending time with when they have the time for it.
Old friend? She’s not leading you on, you set yourself up wrong. We do this stuff around our friends because we don’t expect them to go weird on us. You should ask her out romantically and if she says no do her the best favour and leave her alone. And make your intentions clear in future with others.
@@jaybee4288 we were friends back in elementary school, and kinda drifted apart. Different classes, schedules, interests. Life happened. We went to the same schools until highschool graduation. Never asked her out because of a crippling fear of rejection. We went through all of college (different schools now) just facebook friends. I DMd her a question about a post about her job and she answered. I brought up a couple of regrets from highschool, and for some reason she was nice enough to keep answering. The big problem is, I would like to ask her out, but she has a long term boyfriend for nearly a year now. Figures, finally have the courage to ask her out, and she's taken. So I'm just trying to be a decent friend without totally F***ing it up.
@@LosiDriver7223 Can relate dude
Damn. If I can only count how many times I've gotten myself into this mess of trying to seek friendships. I'm usually introverted, but that need for connection gets strong sometimes and I've found myself getting too wound up trying to connect with someone I admired (not always necessarily a crush, mind you). After relying too much on people who didn't share my energy/enthusiasm for them (one-sided), I just had to quit it and back off. It was starting to mess me up and the solitude was necessary to find clarity and be more observant of those red flags in the video before I get sucked into that miserable ride again. Saved me a whole lot of headaches.
Uhmm I was thinking about letting go of my crush who has a girlfriend.I know it's hard to move on but I have to 🙃
Yeah that sucks dude
I see this way often when people waste their effort and time on people who don't respect it. This is why I'm actively trying to avoid committing my time and energy to someone unless I feel that energy is also directed at me. Because personally, I will commit too much to a person and then end up feeling used for something like attention (or worst, money) when I deserve much better. Regardless of if we want someone or not, if they don't respect that from the beginning, they ain't worth it. Spend time with yourself or friends if you feel lonely, you don't need a partner to feel good. This is why I think it's more important to have friends than it is to have a partner first because friends will help build your confidence and will always make you feel like you got someone to hang out with, and to talk to. If you have feelings towards a friend in a friend group, don't be afraid to take a step towards them but don't take two steps. By step, I mean simply trying to get independent time with them, and if they don't want to do that, it's not worth doing anything else with them.
Ok, I guess something IS wrong, because I started tearing up at the very first phrases. Oh.
Reality check, I’m the backup
I like how the video concluded 👍.. Everyone has the choice of getting romantically involved with someone else, or just enjoying there own company.. NOT everyone is into the same things, and may just choose to take it easy 🤷
I’m currently going through something like this right now. There was nothing official between us, but I knew we had feelings for each other for the last 4 months or so. We would always sit together in class and talk about our pasts and our futures. She suddenly stopped talking to me a week ago, but I haven’t had the courage to talk to her since then. It looks like she’s with someone else now. I’ll never stop having feelings for her, but I guess sometimes you just have to move on.
1. Excuses: we don’t really hang out outside of where we met. So no chance of getting excuses I guess lol
2. One-sided: We also don’t text that much but when we talk I think it’s pretty equal. She usually starts the conversations because I usually get too nervous, but once the conversation gets going it’s both of us
3. Breadcrumbing: I literally don’t think she’d strategize this just to mess with me.
4. Indifference: she seems a little nervous around me sometimes. I don’t know honestly. She bumps my arm when she comes to talk to me usually, idk most body language thing I’ve noticed. I don’t really focus on body language
5. Personal therapist: nah
6, Always Preoccupied: nah
Idk I guess we’ll find out eventually. Idec that much if she doesn’t have a crush on me too, I’d rather become really good friends with her.
Fingers crossed! :-)
Good luck!
How did it turn out?
@@twyra838🤞
@@itsmethough24oh I don’t like her like that anymore but we’re pretty good friends so I’d say it’s a win😂
Could you maybe make a video about religion and how it affects us based on our beliefs? I always wondered how it affects individuals as a whole and if they are comfortable or uncomfortable about it. ❤
My farts are better than Psych2Go’s farts
Yeah, this. I'm christian, but I'm more open and progressive I'd like to think. I don't mind girls wearing what they want, but I do have some reserves when it comes to overly revealing clothes. I'm not talking about croptops or miniskirts, I'm talking about outfits that are more than that. I also feel at odds with girls doing OnlyFans, but I understand better than to judge them but I still feel reserved about these things, you know?
@@KnightsofGaming2016 I get it
@@KnightsofGaming2016 I am atheist married to a Christian. The thing of abuse given a pass because authority or labels of conformity to groups such as religion. Well there was psych experiments on some of those things already.
Now what is overly revealing clothing...kids in a bathing suit? Why are you on onlyfans browsing if it bothers you rather that a christian channels? Now if people show ankle, arms, hair, and faces ...heck there is fetish for everything including what church leaders are secretly into so I guess pray about that if any of it bothers you?
Got playlists on the topic. Cults to religious/irreligious views. Also sex ed stuff and what is asexuality as orientation.
@@KnightsofGaming2016 as an asexual... do not know how that feels.
Wow, the algorithm has done it again. So many things totally make sense now, I really needed to hear this.
My crush did mostly all these things but instead, IT WAS WHILE WE WERE DATING
That’s an especially low blow!
I mean, good points, but I feel like you should have specified that this sucks no matter whether you have a crush on them or not.
It's just bad friend stuff in general. Also if someone isn't just being rude like this, it doesn't mean that they *do* like you that way, sometimes it's just platonic and they're a good friend.
I went through some bad friend stuff, and a lot of these points in the video corresponded to what happened, even though it wasn't romantic. They just ended up using me and pretending to be friends.
@@cloroxbleach6937 same, that sucks. I hope you find/have found better people
"Dude, she's just not into you"
Thanks. Positive information. Just what I needed.
It's funny how my friend and I were both somewhat liking each other in the beginning of our friendship, while loving someone else at the same time.. Our particular relationships didn't work out for each of us, and we remained friends all along, but have lost our chances for each other or love.. No hope now, both gonna stay single forever 😆😂
That thumbnail really hit differently after getting rejected so many times because of my former naive mindset.
Thank you for posting all of theses advises, that could have prevented some things. However, the great thing of getting rejected over and over again is that you start to really question yourself to the point where you are so fed up with everything that you grab yourself firmly and create a divine will of being the best possible version.
For me it counterintuitively gave me way more confidence around women because I'm just authentic, if something works out I'm surprised and happy but never disappointed if something doesn't work out. That, however took me many years and a lot of pain, so again, thank you for helping so many of our little brothers and sisters out so that they don't have to go through all of that by themselves. «3
Thanks! I’ll definitely keep this in mind next time I’m out near my “someone”
That's not fair that u love someone and they love someone else💔
Darn right
I wish I had seen this sooner...Maybe things would be better than they are now...
It took me a while to realize all these signals. Great summary to avoid wasting time
This video sums up this whole past year of my life trying to figure out if a woman ever felt something for me as strongly as I did. It has been a miserable year seeing my feelings get tossed around. Hope I can let her go and go on with my life and have more self respect going forward.
NEVER ACCEPT/CHOOSE SOMEONE WHO GIVES YOU MIXED SIGNALS GUYS. YOU DESERVE BETTER. ❤
Damn, when was this information three years ago? 😅 Every single point is accurate, speaking from experience
We need more of these than signs some one is attracted to you
I want to tell him, that i love him. But maybe he's In love with Someone else.
When she doesn't even show any signs and is clearly into you: Imma doubt it
Some people need to realize that relationships are just not for everyone, even if for most.
I for one have completely given up relationships and been getting happier since. It's just not meant for everybody.
Thank You! Great to receive a lot of information that makes sense in such a short video. Appreciated!
Great video for reality check! 😂👍🏻
sometimes the butterflies in the stomach fly to our eyes so we can't see reality, thus we project a lot of fantasies that can lead us into painful limerence. learning these signs is absolutely helpful to stay grounded in reality and not wasting time for someone who doesn't reciprocate.
im genuinely wishing genuine love for everyone! 🤍
Thanks for this video, it gave me so much clarity of the situation I am lost and trying to keep afloat in. I guess its time to be courages and face the truth, you saved me alot of time and pain!
I am hear in the worst one yet.I had a crush on my boss😭. She realized and got the confession out of me but ever since it hasn't been acted on especially from her side.Now I was doing more of the talking and emotions showing.Kmft, I'm trying to get over it because it isn't making any sense nor seems to be going anywhere. I'm just looking desperate and maybe being annoying
I both love and hate how all your videos come my way at the exact time I need to watch em. Thank you for helping me keep my mental stability as sane as possible
Break, break, break my heart
Break it til i fall apart
This was painfully eye opening
I wished that video came out a few months ago, I spend months to develop a relationship with someone that didn't love me or care about me. I'm still hurt after all this time.
you helped me a lot thanks
Thank you for this video.
It's not you that's the problem, because it takes two. 🥰 so neutrally true. ❤️❤️❤️
I've had something like this happen to me...but with someone who I was "friends" with. They seemed like a really nice person at first. But it turns out they were just using me. They were basically pretending to be best friends with me, but looking back it was very one sided, and they had made lots of excuses, has actually left me "stranded," and like what this video had talked about...I was kinda their back up (but as a "best friend").
I'm not friends with them because we got into conflict...and they made me feel like it was all my fault. Glad it's all over, but it still really, really hurts.
I still can't believe it is true, my cr doesn't like me at all, we are just friends. Anyway, this video is so helpful, keep it up❤
P/s: I love all the boys who commented on this video, it's sweet to know that somewhere still have good people like you🥰
Yup. Needed to see this one today. Thank you
My experience, if you ever come across anyone with any of these traits, move on without them. You'll eventually come across someone that cares and compliments your life and end up taking them for granted still thinking about the person you were chasing before for their attention.
I don't love anyone but i watched this video
thx for this now I'm understanding this
I love people by my heart...
Not by my moods or needs...
I carry a a large amount of love in my heart for THEM
But never forget to give some to myself.