i read ellens book so you don't have to
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- Опубликовано: 5 сен 2024
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want to work with me? email: uncarley@zigguratxyz.com
intro music: Louie Zong - Cycad Conga
the pink tshirt? youre basically sophia grace and rosie
STOP
@@uncarley only difference is one of them is a teen mother
Hahaha both of them
@@eilidhm she is 20 in April 😅
@@eilidhm WHAT
Whenever Ellen feels like she has too much stuff in her house, she just goes ahead and buys a new house.
truly
Imagine
I LOATHE all the anti-consumerist preaching… she’ll hire a plane to fly over her mansion with an “I love you, happy anniversary banner” and yet she’s so minimalist?
And used her show as a platform to shame Americans for indulging in Big Gulps. 🙄
lmao so true. every few months she's buying another enormous place with Portia
I mean, watching Dakota Johnson say “Actually no that’s not the truth, Ellen” DID cure my depression, so I guess technically Ellen was right.
you’re the bravest person on this infernal website
thank you bestie
these reading celebrity books so you don't have to videos are what we needed as a society
thank you bestie
Ellen: going home and watching reality TV is lazy
Also Ellen: hey, you should watch my TV show every day
This is even more ironic considering she wouldn’t shut up about watching the Bachelor on her TV show. She almost made it her entire brand.
Also..."don't watch reality tv" but also "I am a judge on American Idol"
This was the comment I was going to make.
imagine being one of the trees that died to become paper for ellens useless book with two lines on each page 😔
Like your fresh perspective haha
love that she calls people with self driving cars and robot vacuums lazy when i know she doesnt drive herself or vacuum her house
Ellen’s downfall was so disappointing. Her coming out was a big deal. And I hate that she ended up so unkind while she pretended to be the queen of nice.
Ah! Just got to the part where you talked about this😂.
'if you're george bush, then it's fun' is absolutely killing me
george bush is ellens #1 fan
I was about to quote this part. My absolute favorite.
I wouldn't read ellens book even if it was the only book in the world.
fair bestie
I second this
Why ? I don’t get why everyone all of the sudden hates her
@@Raccoon_Chic Maybe the allegations against her about being really abusive to the people who worked for her? All the while promoting a “be kind” mindset? Might be that?
@@0gammag0 cool. You don’t have to sound like a smart ass . I literally had no idea what happened to her .
a moment of silence for the time carley put aside for an ellen book.
moments i WONT GET BACK
truly the hero we don’t deserve
So, let me get this straight...Ellen, calls out everyone for being "lazy" by just sitting on their butts watching tv or playing video games after work. Then, she turns around and tells you to watch her show to be happy? I'm sorry, what? So, is being lazy going to make you happy, or I guess only watching her show? Maybe she is on to something, I'm pretty happy when I'm lazy. :)
@trinitym5552 that's absolutely good advice, but I think you put more thought into this comment than Ellen did into her entire book 😅
@@raveng8217 Yes; I think everyone here did! Ha!
Ellen is like if Sue Sylvester from glee had money, a talk show, and a bigger ego
didn't sue had a talk show? (or was that just when she was running for mayor or president)
@@_bebeboudeur_ she had a news segment I think? Glee truly was a fever dream.
@@_bebeboudeur_ she did. „That’s how sue sees/c’s it.“
Tbh even sue was better. At least sue was funny🤷♀️
Yeah, Ellen also gave me kind of Lea Michele/Rachel Berry vibes when it came out about how she treated the people working on her show.
The thing that kills me about rich ppl is that they literally think everyone has an office job. "You sit on your ass all day" have you never heard of a nurse? A Server? A surgeon? A cashier? These people are so out of touch. I know maybe 2 people with office jobs. Even during covid. "You all can just work from home" I work at a grocery store?? No I can't?? I genuinely think it's cause they forget that those people.. are people
Thank you! That's always what's bugging me about people saying stuff like that. Everybody in hospitality, production, anything like that - they're all on their feet and working in a designated space. If you work with other people - be it children or elderly people or whatever - you also most likely are up and running the whole time. I also don't know a lot of people who do have an office job where they solely sit at a desk and work at a computer
Lol yep I’m teacher support staff (basically an after school program to help kids with homework). We tried to do it online during covid but it was not a success. Just like for a lot of high schoolers online school in general wasn’t a success. I have friends who are veterinarians, one works as a train controller, one of them works in robotics in a lab, one of them is a forklift driver. Try doing those things from home 😂😂😂 it just won’t work.
I read this randomly years ago when i was stuck at a relatives and the ONLY thing I remember is her talking about always wearing pants because she has a bougainvillea tattoo on her legs that attracts bees
there was some crazy shit in this book
Hahahaha
the charlie puth aside was a truly iconic moment in an already incredible video
the charlie puth reveal shook me
When a celebrity needs to feel relevant again, they gather up the audacity to put pen to paper or put ghost writer to paycheck and Carly does the work no one else is prepared to do. A true queen.
her calling people lazy for watching tv but she wouldn’t be rich and famous if no one watched her on tv
Greyson Chance was also signed to Ellen’s label. Both he and Charlie Puth called out Ellen and her label for “abandoning” them after signing them.
omg i completely forgot about that greyson chance kid. that came outta the vault
Bestie you’re truly putting yourself through the ringer for our entertainment and that means so much!!!
i love pain!
carley’s really been in the trenches and i thank her for her service
can't forget when she made a video about being sad & bored in early quarantine while at a ranch that could accommodate a fully functional town 😭
I can't believe you didn't include the chapter where she just screams into the void "for people who are listening to the audiobook" like?????
there was just too much chaos to include in one video
😂😂❤️❤️
lmao please elaborate, what is this about
I haven't listened to the audiobook but in the book she just has this page with random words that are not words and she says it's a chapter for people listening to the audiobook where they can listen to her make sounds basically
Experimentalist queen 😭
i feel like carley put more time and effort into making this video than ellen did into writing her book
“Ellen tell me about your moral compass” 😂😂😂😂
“I mean I wasn’t laughing, but I did breathe out of my nose” loll
a nose laugh if you will
As opposed to mouth breathing. Lol
GIRLBOSS IS BACK!💞Wait 'til you hear that the ultra-popular (& frankly just toxic) BookTok piece 'It Ends With Us' has the main protagonist write regular fanmail to Ellen and it is exactly as cringy as it sounds....
Love your stand-up-esque book reviews, keep 'em coming!😎📖
im so sscared to read colleen hoover
Truly the worst aspect of those books - even cringier in the sequel.
@@uncarley and you're damn' right to - they're a menace!😂
@@levityoflonging22 Oh, no I didn't have it in me to read the sequel - think IEWU has permanently destroyed my impulse to read a popular book at random for good, haha!😅
Carley PLEASE read it ends with us for a video 😂 it is terrible and I want to hear your thoughts
for some reason i read this book at the tender age of 10 so thank u for reminding me of how insane it was
SAME i read it first @ 10 and for what
I literally got it for Christmas that year lmfao
it's honestly unhealthy how i just have your videos on repeat, thank you for making me less lonely in my one bedroom apartement lol
omg im so glad bestie!
Yooo I also live in a one bedroom! How many sqms do you have? My appartment is 24 sqm. Lovin' it. It's 332€ a month.
@@sieeeeeeen that sounds so nice and affordable the heck😭 one beds where I live start at like £900 at BEST before u add bills and tax
You uploading just made my day 10x better
thank you bestie!!
Who else watches her videos when they're in reading slump
wishing you the best luck getting out of the slump
I don’t even really read. I just think Carley is hilarious
So basically 24/7? Yeah
I'm trying to read Dracula, and I'm just not enjoying it, so I'm here instead.
Critiquing Ellen's book is probably the most girlboss thing you could've done. 😎👍Zelda Fitzgerald would be proud!
zelda would fight ellen
@@uncarley ON SITE! Ellen would be done-ion-rings with her coloring book ass.
I would recommend Viola Davis’ memoir. Not because it problematic or anything but I read it last week and I almost cried at some parts. The shit she had to go through.
the irony of ellen talking about too much stuff....because she gives every guest gimick gifts with her name all over them so they cant even use them in practical life
Her tips for being a good modal is LITERALLY the skit she did with taylor swift on her show 15 years ago !
There was a gag on Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt where one of her friends wrote a memoir. She excitedly held up a copy on a talk show and said, "The pages are just a block of styrofoam!" I think about that whenever a celebrity writes a book.
😂 Now so will I
"ellen, tell me about your moral compass" now THAT'S a good book premise
it is hilarious to imagine that in the infamous "it ends with us" this is the book that atlas got lily blossom bloom. I'm pretty certain it's not, but the thought cracks me up nonetheless
😂😂 Honestly, I wouldn’t put it past him. She was already a big fan of Ellen so she would love to own anything by her
The timing of this video was immaculate because I just startdd my lunch break. Thank you, once again,, for allowing me to escape reality for 17 mins 😌
omg happy to help bestie
i can picture one of ellen's employees watching this at home and just tapping the shoulders of the people around them everytime you insult ellen for the way she treats her empoyees.
@Trinity M you're just right. Men can literally rape ppl, generally women; and have amazing careers. Men can be mean to their staff and no one cares bc it's a man. God forbid a woman isn't perfect, though. Any imperfections a woman has she will be absolutely be eaten alive for...
you’re like the official celebrity memoir correspondent of youtube
Omg bestie! I remember commenting on your videos forever ago that I was hoping to get back into reading since ADHD made it challenging for me to read by sight and I actually freaking did it this weekend! And it was way easier now that I'm on meds! I think I was mostly just psyching myself out. I'm so proud of myself but now I can't joke about being illiterate anymore 😂 thanks for inspiring me for getting back into it ❤️
!!! congratulations!!
@@uncarley thank you sm Carley! 🥹❤️
I live in NY and I totally want to travel north to Toronto to catch one of your shows. I'll have to bring that book so you can sign it (if I remember at least 😅)
@Trinity M oh yeah, you're definitely right. I only joke to my friends about it, some of whom are English and special Ed teachers so they understand the context better than me. I appreciate you mentioning it though because I was talking to one of those friends about Oliver James on TikTok, he's a dad in his 30's who was functionally illiterate, he's challenging himself to read a bunch of books with the help of supporters on TikTok. Very wholesome guy I recommend checking out! I was surprised because the article I was reading mentioned what percentage of the US population was functionally illiterate and I was so surprised how high it was! I don't remember what it was but I'm pretty sure it was at least in the double digits. It's a bigger issue than one (at least with my privilege) would realize. I'll try to be more sensitive about it in the future but, like I said, at least I don't have a reason to make the joke anymore! ❤️
I am eating these celeb memoir videos UP! They are so funny, and you save us the frustration of reading them ourselves
the way you were able to do the entire Lelo ad read without giggling.....girlboss slay
I just made a cross country move with my two cats and my infant and your videos have been the soundtrack to my packing, travel and unpacking. I think I've watched all of them now. Thank you for your humor and your spice.✌️
WOW good for you, moving is so stressful. Hope you're all settled in now!
The fact that you respond to at least half your comments (and half of those responses are “thanks bestie”) is too wholesome for me
"Ellen, tell me more about your moral compass."
You killed me
I could watch you destroying celebrity books for the rest of my mediocre life and never get bored.
I read this in University for a strange student-led mini course about Ellen Degenerous back when she was at her peak. What a time
This was the most blunt, ungraceful sponsorship transition and I'm here for it. Go girl, give us nothing.
I've had this book on my shelf for like 7 years and have always been curious about what's in it and refused to read it. really appreciated this
I'm 60years old and I really enjoy watching you. Even when I don't agree with you completely. Keep it real!!
Very off topic but you’re looking GORGEOUS girl
thank you!!
I’ve read Ellen DeGeneres book, it’s called It Ends With Us
😭😭😭
After you read the haiku I had to pause the video and laugh. Also your face when saying 'moving on', perfect.
I get so happy when you upload! Your videos have helped me get back into reading after 5 years
eek im so glad
Just the fact that you do these vids with that "singer style mic" is iconic in itself. Cheers from Spain.
I really like how you promote self pleasure on your channel through the sponsors. Genuinely I think women have a hard time taking sexuality into their own hands and I appreciate that you promote it as often as you do.
After the Haiku, RUclips cut immediately to an ad for therapy... and I think that tracks
I love you being sponsored by Lego very much! It’s nice to see them branching out
hahaha
“Marie Kondo found dead in a ditch” took me out💀
Love that you included both stair pushes in the Glee clip. It was a necessary artistic decision
I'm loving your memoir coverage lately!
Slay! I’m so excited for this! You need to do a video on the rest of Twilight!
oooo soon!
@@uncarley YAS QUEEN!
i love that she is saying (beauty is not about the color of your hair or your eyes) she is only talking about white people and the standars between them and i love it she is being inclusive to blonds and brunete and people with blue eyes OR brown eyes!! ugh love that
Love the fact you’re willing to sacrifice brain cells to save the rest of us from reading terrible books. The hero we needed but don’t deserve. ❤️
You were so degenerous to read this for us ❤️
did the ellen not-book pre date the gabbie hanna bad poetry? cause one def inspired the other here. The pages with 1 sentence, the puns and desperate attempts to be relatable
Gah! I’m so excited for this video! I’ve had your videos on repeat for the past couple weeks. My best friend of 15 years recently passed away and one of your videos was recommended. I've been playing them on repeat while I clean and move around the house. Makes me feel a little less lonely. Thank you so much for this content.
I'm so sorry for your loss. That's rough. Take care of yourself.
Sorry for your loss 💜
something about the dusting/spilling quote just instantly gave me war flashbacks to Gabbie Hanna's attempt at poetry
the delivery of the Haiku, brilliant. the scream I scrumpt!
we need more videos like "i have good taste and you can too" pleaseee
This video is, in scientific terms, a banger.
u & jack posting the same day gave me serotonin
I wasn’t planning on reading her book, but thanks for reading for it so I definitely don’t have to. Appreciate it.
sue pushing the guy down the stairs CRACKED me up damn i was not expecting that one😂😂😂
the haiku haikun't thing made me giggle so much
I was not ready for that sponsor😂 my reaction was blank 🗣️
have you ever read anna kendrick or ian harding's memoirs??? i honestly enjoyed them, anna kendrick's especially really seems like she put effort into it (and did not hire a ghostwriter).
ooh I really wanna read Anna Kendrick's book!!
Not Sue pushing that cheerful choir director from Aural intensity down the stairs. That scene kills me everytime I see it.
“Ellen tell me about your moral compass😀” is killing me
...why did i laugh at the haiku 😭
the haiku was the last straw for me
Oh man I found this book in a Value Village like 15 years ago and read it and man it wasn't worth the like $3 I paid for it.
its literally like 400 words MAX
@@uncarley In a lapse of judgement I can only attribute to being young I also read her first "book" and... no.
NO WAY YOUR SPONSORED BY LELO IVE BEEN EYEING THEIR PRODUCTS FOR SO LONG NOW WOW FULL CIRCLE MOMENT
Shocking how there's not a single chapter about how to bully non native English speakers for their accent (*see also Sofia Vergara)
You're my new favorite channel I subscribed too and I'm just thankful for your humor, cynicism, and amazing ability to condense literal nonsense into a way that is digestible for your fans
i've became so acquainted with the cat chair thing on the wall that I'm very happy to see them in your videos
The plot of Fahrenheit 451 was foreshadowing specifically so no one in the future could read Ellen’s book
carley I love your autobiography reading insight, the books are horrendous but you make it so enjoyable
I love the Dakota statement in the thumbnail 😂
Id pay money to see Ellen vacuum her 70 million dollar house.
Lily Blossom Bloom would love this
Thanks for cleaning up the word vomit that is this book. Your sacrifice is appreciated
pls this used to be my fav book in middle school
6:16 PLEASE NOT THE GLEE CLIP 💀😭
Rich people preaching being minimalists always bothers me. When you have the ability to just buy what you need and then when you don't need it anymore you throw it away. That's a privilege. Normal people 'hoard' because we can't afford to buy the same item multiple times so we keep it just in case we even need it again.
Slay! It's 5am and I'm about to sleep and you post this banger, you know me so well bestie x
sweet dream bestie
ya'll, remember when ellen uploaded the video crying about how being stuck in her insane mansion during lockdown and how it was exactly the same as being in prison? she's adorable!
Please read Pam Anderson's book next! Cant bring myself to read it but I need your recap xoxoxox
Um did anyone else see the part that mentions Simon sitting next to her “caressing her leg under the table” 13:53 whatttt?????? 🥲
this book is full of weird jokes like that