I love this so much. You can hear him talking to you just like a father would tell his child. It’s in the care of his voice that you can rest assured there is good out there and that person for you is not an absent abnormality but rather a necessity created just for you. Your someone is out there, don’t stop looking but also don’t stop being your best you because that’s who they’ve got their eye out for.
... ... all flawed advice ... JP admits himself that attraction is unknown ... so finding love outside of family, through biased groups and people without your best interests is unsurprisingly vague ...
Maybe you need to have a blunt talk with him about it otherwise he’ll probably never realize it’s an issue for you. Bluntness solves more problems than staying quiet does because it lets people know what you want and need. It’s especially one of, if not the most important thing in a relationship!
@@Matthew-oe2fxExactly. I admire you for realising that. Too much cynicism and dismissal of love/romance these days. Love is the meaning of life. Much love to you. ❤
Once hurt twice shy. Easier to say than to do. I don't blame ppl who don't wanna get rejected over and over again. It's their choice and their lives. I send them a big hug, they are better than what meets the eye.
Thanks again, Internet Dad. I was waiting expectantly to hear some really realistic, downright pessimistic thing that we’d probably missed the boat, but JP goes around and says something completely realistic, but not at all pessimistic thing that just says that, yes life sucks, but do the right things anyways. And sometimes life will surprise you.
Apps for dating are certainly inferior dont get why anyone would get offended by that as a fact. Because you find people there which is nothing good. Id rather meet in face to face. Oh and i smell people. From far away my uncle says im weird but its all the nose i swear i dont get too close its simply the strong smell those people have as their armpits or body. Now ill try reading their minds oh wait thats an invasion of privacy nvm.
@@IsraelCountryCube apps are for getting dates, they don't replace it. they only replace the first sight. so its the same like every other date you have in "real life". the problem is when people write weeks and maybe never date. this is not what they are made for.
And make sure that person is a life partner you can tolerate. Remember looks change, money comes and goes. But if you can't stand the person you wake-up next to each day. You're not just wasting your time but their's.
Dating sites are the worst places to find "love", especially for a guy. I recommend NOT searching for love, either online of offline. The best way to find someone is through your personal journey, meaning its best for you to focus on your career, hobbies, be a good person, and eventually you will have people attracted to you.
You can focus on your career as well as also pursuing someone you're attracted to, but I get your point. My own philosophy is to just do it when I feel like I can take that responsibility of having a relationship with someone.
@@trmp9923 Well, my advice was for men, can't speak for women. Focusing in career is never a good idea for women, but thats just my uneducated opinion and based on my personal experience with 50 year old women that focused on career and now are lonely.
@@LittleBoxXx If you tell women not to focus on career, what are the chances that she'll find a 'providing alpha man'? Men are into different things some would actually prefer a woman who is focused on her career and still want to provide for her while others would want a stay at home woman... Don't cut yourself short just because you're trying to find somebody, be your authentic self and chase your heart's desire (if it's right for you) that way you won't end up frustrated, sad, UNFULFILLED and also 'lonely'
Don't recommend looking for "love" online. There will be scores of people there, not always with the best of motives. Some guys just looking for sex. A better way is to enrol in a live class in a subject that interests you. That way if you meet someone, he/she is there to learn, you can also see them face to face and not behind a screen. You share a common interest, they are not there from ulterior motives and at the end of the day, whether you find a love interest or not, you will have learnt something and increased your knowledge base. A win-win scenario I would say.
@@johanv247 I’m a feminist? Lmao. Why, because I know how men think? Being a man with a working libido, and knowing many others just like me is what gave me that insight, not because I’m a “feminist” (that’s a first btw, normally I’m called a misogynist) you bag of douche.
@@KelticTim oh sorry i misunderstood you .. obviously you're not a feminist... you're just an idiot ... im a man and I'm not and was never a disgusting one that looks just for sex online... so dont generalize ... just because you and your pathetic friends are doesn't mean every man is . grow up man !!!!
@@johanv247 oh fuck off man. Don’t white Knight me. All men think with their dicks first. Some, like you, just like to pretend you’re “one of the good ones”. Just because you’re looking for sex, and maybe a relationship too, doesn’t mean you’re an asshole or whatever, you can admit your wants and still be a good man. I’ve never personally had an online dating whatever, but after just getting out of a 10yr marriage, I’m considering it. And yes, I’ll be looking for a relationship, but only with women I’d like to have sex with, and you are too, unless you wanna keep pretending that you’d get into a relationship with a woman you don’t find sexually attractive. Go ahead and tell that lie.
“Do what you can to be attractive to the people you want to be attracted to you” is incredible advice. I’ve had so many friends either believing they had to settle for less than they desired, or accusing those perceived out of their league as being shallow for not overlooking their (often fixable) flaws. You can do better! Focus on personal development to become the type of person you and others can be proud of - not only do you deserve better, but your future potential partner deserves it as well.
Well, although I agree with being your best self, I don't agree with deserving such a partner that is also the best, but that doesn't mean I believe I don't deserve one either. As for settling, everyone technically settles, no one can be "perfect" it's just a matter of what you're going to be willing to put up with or not and imo, if you aren't will to put up with people who got it bad for them, even though they haven't necessarily compromised any of the values you hold dear to you, then maybe you shouldn't have a long term partner? (Because if you can't accept the fact that people make mistakes or just aren't going to be "the best", then you're not gonna be able to truly accept anyone and nither will they.)
You can’t make yourself attractive to a demographic entirely. Because no demographic is monolithic in what it’s attracted to. Amongst gays, some men like masculine men, some like feminine men.
Why most humans think that finding romantic love/ your so call other half/twin flame etc etc is a MUST OF THE HUMAN EXPERIENCE. Certain things will not happen in your journey for instance the person that wants to be a ballet dancer but that unfortunately does not happen either due to an injury or does not get accepted to a dance school or the person that plans to be a neurosurgeon but does not get accepted to medical school; some experiences, lessons, and paths will not take place in your journey through this lifetime, and one of them could be romantic love. Many will experience other types of love but romantic love might not be in their life journey so why, why humans cannot accept that as a possibility?
@@kintsukuroi6300exactly. We are wired to desire romantic love but some of us will never get it. There is no improvement that can make an invisible man all of a sudden turn into a man married to a good wife. Never.
@@regulareverydayhalfbirdguy Im sorry. It's in one of his videos. I rewound it a few times to get it exactly right, so it's an exact quote. I wish I knew which video it was in. It's a great one.
@@regulareverydayhalfbirdguy I wrote it in my journal so I was careful to get it exactly right. I've watched so many of his, I have no idea which one it is. I'm sorry.
A wise man once said “who by worrying can add one cubit to his stature” “sufficient for the day is its own trouble”. He ask for your faith in him! You would be surprised what He could do for you’re worries! Add that to your message JP for the recipe of a perfect solution! Though it’s easier said than done
"Surrender your affairs to me, and everything will be peaceful." -Jesus to Don Dolindo Ruotolo Look up the 'Novena of Surrender' and 'Conversation of the Merciful God With a Sinful Soul'.
Yeah thats not true at all, loads of guys try al their lives and dont get even a date, that bs is for women, i apologize if you are a woman as it wil happen for you 100% guaranted but if you are a guy reading this, no no it wownt definatly happen, it could well not, i know this because its happened to me and ive never had a gf in my life ! and im 45 yrs old, so no thats a load of bs
@@mcpartridgeboyYou have a point, but you also spit some bs there Being a woman does not guarantee anything, sure they're probably more likely to, but guarantee? 100%? Nah fam
@@Yusa_Beach ive never met one who couldnt get a date, ive never met anyone who has met one who couldnt get a date, ive been told by many women online who at first pretended they couldnt but then it turns out they had no "quality" offers, and these were women that argued hardcare that dating wasnt a gender issue ! ive never heard of one that couldnt get one even online from women who prwtend dating is hard for women ! so idk, there may be one very heavily disabled woman possiby, but its exceptionally rare !
@@mcpartridgeboyI don't want to sound harsh but that has something to do with you, not them. Identify what's holding you back from attracting people, maybe it's your appearance or more likely your behaviour and general vibe. Then work out how to fix it, because it can be fixed, and it won't be too hard either. Do a lot of introspection about your life and how you've treated people, how you've presented yourself and how others reacted. Your attitude and worldview is also crucial. Cynicism is poisonious to both the cynic and the people he interacts with. Open your mind and your heart. Don't make excuses. I could go on but I think you get the idea. Much love to you. ❤
In just a word, "Try". This is how everything in life works. Try and if you fail, try once again. Work, relatonships, everything. Thank you mr Peterson.
The problem with that is with women the more you try the worse results you get, but also if you dont try you also get bad results, so trying is irrelivent you need to become a good pick up artist to have any hope of getting a gf nowadays ! which is basically try but manipulate her so it looks like you are not trying which takes a hell of a lot of skill unfortunatly !
@mcpartridgeboy This is the advice men give other men and it's exactly why it doesn't work out. You have no clue what woman really want and need. Stop taking advice from other guys who also don't really have a clue. Take advice from men who have been married 20+ years and know how to get and KEEP a good woman.
I feel the pain man, but just keep moving forward, ask yourself if you're doing the best you can do to maximise the probability that a girl would go out with you and then work towards improving it.
@@nadav3695 the only thing i can think of is being more in shape but tbf I'm not that bad I really have a confidence issue and have no idea how to fix it.
Rather than trying to find love, try to nurture it with people you know. Love is developed over long periods of time. People often misattribute attraction for love. Attraction is ephemeral, love is resilient. It can endures a lot before it actually fades.
Yeah- so far the best couplings I've seen are from christians and the christian youth group. They are matrue and know each other willing to love the person as a person and not as a lover. As- man! are we bad to our lovers when we don't love the person.
I watch a lot of these clips. This one stands out as being just the right gentle, sweet response. Very compassionate and nice to see where there is so many harsh clips on these short videos.
@@lamefuqq6985I guess it means to do what you want to do, so if you want to find love, to which what you define it as someone who cares for you a lot and is willing to also experience intimacy with you then do what needs to be done.
I'm not worried that I'll never "find love," I'm just worried about being alone for the rest of my life. The problem for me is, I really don't "want" love. I don't try to put myself out there, I'm not very social, the idea of being in a relationship sounds like it'd be more stressful than fulfilling for me right now. And quite frankly I don't think I have the capability of "loving" people who aren't my family. But this comes with the price of being forever alone.
My fear is that I'll die old and alone, with no one that cares for me and my existence a memory that the world quickly forgets. A relationship currently sounds like a bad idea because I don't want to subject anyone to being with me. Edit: I should clarify that it's a part of me that thinks and feels this way, not my whole being. This part of me can be quite loud and convincing, though, drowning out the more optimistic, positive, hopeful parts.
@@alinpetrescu2309 not exactly a solution, but it is important for him/her to notice all those I's. Its a step in the right direction. Love and relationships are two way streets. It's not always comfortable or exactly by your wishes and needs, but when the realization that you just woke up and you're not alone and actually have someone hits you, it's an irreplaceable feeling that sticks with you. There are assholes out there though, ngl
So is creating a profile on dating apps/social media the right way? NOPE, not at all. It's only gonna lead you to worse depression. You just have to get over the fact 1.that love is subjective and it's not everything 2.Sometimes looking for love is the worse thing you can do, the more you try the more suffering without results 3.Love is overrated, you might not be as fulfilled as you think anyway after you find someone. CONCLUSION: live your life as if love doesn't exist. Ask yourself: what would I do if I didn't care about love? Would I go to that trip? Would I take on this hobby? Would I hang out with these people? If the answer is no, STOP. You are desperately looking for love in the wrong places. Love MIGHT find you but you must first stop trying so hard
I was single for so long being introverted and cheated on at the end of high school and not having many reliable social circles basically non existing. So when I finally met someone I liked I didn't know what to Do. Did I forget how to fall in love again or was I too scared to even consider my feelings. Not until she left Australia back to her home in Japan almost 12 months ago did I realize my mistake. Next time I will remember not to let go so easily
I've been doing everything you said for many years now my dear Dr. Peterson. I have a job I'm proud of (software engineer), I just bought a lovely apartment at a great neighborhood, I try to eat right and exercise regularly. I'm not amazing looking but I put effort into it. I'm 34, a bit above average height and quite lean/muscular. I play the guitar and read books and have many other interests. I've dated hundreds of women by now. That's not a brag. I haven't gotten into sexual intimacy with any but a few. Those I really wanted did not want me back. I try not to fall for all the obvious traps like showing I'm too enthusiastic too soon, or anything like that. I always pick the lady up from home and bring her back, pay for the date or put effort with good wine and fruit if it's a park date and basically try my best to be a gentleman. Still alone and don't know what to do anymore :(
Maybe you put too much effort into the dates. Just decide where you meet (don't pick her up and bring her back home) and split the bill. Or just go for drinks that's cheaper and sometimes more fun. I think there are hardly any women who appreciate this "Gentleman" like behaviour.
@@JS-vo3ok In my country most ladies don't own cars, some even don't have a driver's license. Those who do, do not use it much. It's pretty rare to see one that does. So in most cases I didn't even have a choice about picking them up. Also, splitting the bill is considered very taboo and most ladies will see it as a deal breaker if a guy even hints at it. So those are not the issues, it's just a cultural thing here in general, it's not just me.
@@Dimitris_Half it's literally my life.. what exactly am I lying about so "obviously"? Also why would I lie? I'm saying I'm miserable in case you didn't notice. Why would anyone lie about being miserable?
Those who worry they will never find love typically have more worry than drive in their life. I love his advice, increase your probabilities and embrace the struggle as part of life.
This is the best dating advice I think I've ever found on RUclips. I've never personally found it "difficult" but there's so many videos and channels on this platform that tailor to helping people find these secrets, but this is just as simple as it is. You gotta love yourself first or you won't have anything to offer another. Then, baby steps...
I’ve found love. …she just didn’t love me back. She meant the world to me. It didn’t help that I pushed her away with my own damn insecurities… I really miss her. She can’t stand me now, though…
n its hard for men to find love, women get literally thosands of offers of love every week some thosands every day, women have literally never had it so easy in their entire history of humanoity lol, so its only hard for all men ! for all women its easier than ordering pizza ! literally !
@@dontreply69that is what most people mislabel as love. It is not love. Though yes, the increasing issue of that mislabeling causes the problem occuring.
I've tried all that and never succeeded. The reason is because I hope. I hoped that I will find someone. I hoped that I won't stay alone forever. So when my efforts don't bear fruit, I get disappointed and feel like I didn't try hard enough or that I'm not worthy to find it. But no, I am worthy, and I did try my best. What I've learnt is that putting too much hope into something might or might not happen is a dumb way to live because when it doesn't pan out the way you'd want to, you feel disappointed and even worse, you might even be depressed. The lesson that I've learnt is that I shouldn't be hoping too much. I'm fine where I'm at. I don't pressure myself to find love. If it happens, it happens. I find myself being more calm, more neutral. I can see that I can finally have joy in the little things in life. I also took relationship/love/marriage etc from the pedestal and put it on parr with being single. I'm more stoic than ever. It can be hard to come to terms with the possibility of never finding love, but it's worthwhile journey on its own. I'm never ever going to lie to myself that "someone is out there for me". Because it may very well be that no one is there 😅.
I watch this and I still have the thoughts to myself “I am not good enough for anyone”. I am worried I will never be enough for someone and worried of rejection.
Doing this makes it worse. But also trying to help someone to see how great they are, doesn't do much good either. You have to see it for yourself first. I found a 'nice guy' who had very low self esteem, I told him how great he was bc I could see who he was behind the masks he wore (for a few years might I add), but didn't do me any good. So now I know let them find out for themselves if they want to 🤷🏾♀️ IF they want to put the work in for themselves.
@@bananarae9207 I am prepared to put the said work in. I am going to therapy and working on my flaws ( working out at gym to lose weight and sort myself out )
... ... all flawed advice ... JP admits himself that attraction is unknown ... so finding love outside of family, through biased groups and people without your best interests is unsurprisingly vague ...
@@Killgore52 ... I'm definitely out there .... in Spain from England without language skills ... turned my life upside down ... more complex that can be articulated on here.
This is like, the best delivery of any message he's given in the sense of it's apparent nature, as well as the message being plain and simple to begin with. Something inexplicably nice about that.
It's smart to keep yourself open and aware Though yeah- I don't have romantic desires so I am very unlikely to find love that makes me happy and doesn't hurt me more than anything.
It’s taken a half a century of numerous mistakes to be able to say with complete acceptance that UNTIL WE LOVE ❤️ OURSELVES & forgive ourselves of past mistakes we surely can not expect someone else to love us until we love ourselves! ❤❤❤I pray that more people need to actually understand that the problem starts with us not loving ourselves! The sooner you love yourself others will magnify to you and love you unconditionally ❤
Nah, dating sites will only knock you down even further if you're an average looking male. It all basically boils down to looks or power (i.e. money) and if you don't have one of these, you're fucked. That's why my only wish is to forget it all and find some sort of comfort in being alone, no matter how bleak and depressing such a life may seem.
not at all... but if you look for someone who is similar to you then you will find someone. Some will indeed get more chances but all you need is one right. You have to be in it to win it, if you leave the game early then you've already lost. Sometimes we over shoot and that can be an issue also, we all have to be realistic.
*If you want love that will never abandon you, learn to love yourself.* And, if another person is mean to you, walk away and find someone who will be nice to you. This is the wisdom I've gained after 68 years of making mistakes. I was a slow learner.
I think I enjoy being single (been about 18 months) after 19 years of not being single, but I do get lonely from time to time. The thing is, I am now 35 and not getting any younger and I wonder if this single life is sustainable, or if I'll grow old and regret not trying to get back out there, because I'm not trying to date anymore. Is this normal?
I have that same concern. I think it’s because of the fact that we do grow old and die that feelings of loneliness come up from time to time. Suppose we were immortal and that we can neither age nor die. Would us single Pringles be content staying single? Would we feel those same bouts of loneliness as frequently as you would right now? I argue we’ll eventually get lonely, but used to this feeling over time. We’ll likely just become more bored than lonely, wouldn’t you say? Not something we humans can’t handle. Emotions are natural, but another fabric weaved into the human condition. If you feel that you’re better off single despite your worries, then you will have no problem staying so in a hundred or thousand years. But, if you feel that cashing in a relationship is actually more fulfilling, go for it while you’re in the here and now. What you’re feeling is normal, but there’s a saying when engaging in anything: “If you drink water, remember the source.”
Growing old is pretty shit no matter what you do. My older neighbor who was in a happy marriage and has kids had to see his wife slowly decline and die in front of him. Truth is everyone dies horribly and if you are lucky you will have loved ones around to watch you suffer.
@@ponternal what a cynical and horrible outlook on aging. I feel sorry for you bud, you sound miserable. Men get better with age as long as you put in the work. Women only need to worry about having children in time. Aging is a beautiful process if you played your cards right, I’m assuming you haven’t. Not everyone dies horribly. Lots of people die peacefully in their sleep, in the arms of a loved one, etc. Get help.
@@TLongUSA97 I don’t think it’s cynical. I think he’s right, maybe not for all but majority of us will suffer at some point in life and lose loved ones. Some of us are/will be lucky enough to age graciously but some are and will be suffering. Stop calling people miserable because they don’t romanticise getting old and dying!
People can get lonely even being married or having friends. Its not about being just single. But know that God will never leave you nor forsake you if you believe in Jesus. Don’t date if you believe its not for you. Even if you change your mind 20yrs later, there are still opportunities to meet someone special for you. It just sounded that you had a past that can be addressed, seek help if needed. Once you are healed then you are ready to be out there for that special one at the right time. Just enjoy each day God gives!
Having been left by the love of my life. I know I'll never meet anyone ever again. No matter how i improve my life, i cant allow someone that close again. Women no longer make the effort to connect with someone. Or to allow connection to happen at all. Society has ruined dating. Its days like these i question why im doing all this work. Maybe tomorrow will be better. But i know it won't be
Jordan Peterson and Miss Manners agree. 😊 Get out there. Join groups that enjoy doing what you enjoy doing on the "birds of a feather" principle. You might meet your mate. Do good things for your family members, friends, neighbors and co-workers. They might introduce you to someone they think you'll like. Attend social events -- parties, cookouts, receptions, faith group gatherings (e.g., church picnic), sporting events, book clubs, golf tournaments, and so on. Good luck is when preparation meets opportunity. Don't chase The One, but make a habit of creating opportunities to meet new people.
Quitters never win and winners never quit. Always remember that. We live in a world of constant maintenance, you’re either evolving or deteriorating. I could tell by the way you speak, you possess a lot of stubbornness so I wouldn’t be surprised if you don’t listen to me.
I gave up on love in general at 25. 30 now. Yes it sucks sometimes, but not playing a game you cannot win is a lot better for peace of mind and allows you to concentrate on other things.
It's situations like these that make me happy I'm single. Yeah, I have a cynical view.... but, that "view" is protecting me from the pain that comes from betrayal, heartbreak, and even trauma. Shitty relationships can certainly be traumatizing. I don't know if I want to take that risk again..
@@Feber2001 I'd say roll with the punches and push forward. Family is too important to give up on. (Not to say that you can't find fulfillment down other paths)
@@steampowered6883 Your view is too optimistic and bound for failure.... at least for me. I don't want to get betrayed again. I've been in therapy for a year because of it. I don't think I can handle another heartbreak like that
I did have a girl in my life once but before it became anything serious I messed it up because I was so paranoid. I had such low self esteem that I literally could not believe she was with me because she liked me. I basically lost my mind. thought she was sleeping with other guys or making fun of me behind my back. I got angry at her often basically accusing her of such things. Never said it directly but just went on and on about her male friends and stuff like that. She didn't want to put up with it anymore. That was 3 years ago. I still miss her sometimes, and I am still convinced I will never find love. I literally met her through discord believe it or not, she started talking to me. We met up and spend only about 3 months seeing eachother regularly. I still don't know why or how she was attracted to me. And such a chance encounter is insanely rare. I basically threw away the only oppertunity I had or ever will have to have a partner.
I've just met a very special person. Its very early days , but my intuition is already telling me this is gonna be for the long haul. 35 years old, thought i'd never love again. Thought I'd never get married. Now the possibilities seem boundless all of a sudden. Cos I took action. Thank you Jordan for your priceless advice ❤
@@rooster555555 how? I workout 4 times a week and meal prep all my food its actually one of my passions i have set and reached multiple financial and career goals for myself and i have many more that i wanna achieve in the future, I'm always learning and looking for ways to learn a new skill or get better at something, I actually love the person I've become and am excited to see what I'll do with my future, how am I doing it wrong?
Does my computer count? I clean it every 2 months, I don't bloat it, I make sure to delete trash files, I don't overclock it too much and I also upgrade it every couple years so we together can keep up with the games that challenge us. Granted, I overuse it sometimes I give it time for itself when I'm at work or out with friends. It's perfect and it's enough for me, for now.
Love is really just a drug to ease the fear and uneasiness of loneliness but that fear will be waiting for you once the drug wears off, in the end there’s really no difference from living alone. -A manga
Most people become feel much more alone in relationships than when alone. Because no one truly understands what it means to enter that 'ship'. It's highly underestimated. Hardly anyone is bothered to do some true self work and step into some silly 'partnership' to then project all their shit on and into and so they will eventually break down and learn some of it (if the breakdown has been deep enough)
“I don’t understand why half the world is crying, when the other half is crying, too.”
-Janis Joplin
I dont get it
How? Everyone's crying, but what are they crying for?
I think he meant that everyone is worried they will never find love, in context to the video.
@@deisk2707 half of the world means women and the other half is men so so they both do cry
@@Maymay-mz4cp thanks
I love this so much. You can hear him talking to you just like a father would tell his child. It’s in the care of his voice that you can rest assured there is good out there and that person for you is not an absent abnormality but rather a necessity created just for you. Your someone is out there, don’t stop looking but also don’t stop being your best you because that’s who they’ve got their eye out for.
... ... all flawed advice ... JP admits himself that attraction is unknown ... so finding love outside of family, through biased groups and people without your best interests is unsurprisingly vague ...
None of this is remotely what he is saying here.
@@timangar9771 can’t a fulking guy just have a bit of dam hope?
It feels warm yes
A necessity created just for you? Uhhh, no. No one was "created just for" anyone else.
I kinda teared up ngl
His eyes was thinnking of his wife and he was recalling some of his own memories. MAN.. I felt it
same!!
How do you know what he thinks?
@@timt6312 intuition, a different kind of knowing.
@@basketballTaco sounds like bs to me
@@timt6312 It is bs actually. I tried to fool you and failed. I wonder how you figured it out. Some thing, starts with an 'i'... 🤔
Man I wish my dad talked to me like this. Literally my depression would be cured.
Maybe you need to have a blunt talk with him about it otherwise he’ll probably never realize it’s an issue for you. Bluntness solves more problems than staying quiet does because it lets people know what you want and need. It’s especially one of, if not the most important thing in a relationship!
Doesn't happen in India lol
@@srishtishetty8578 Don't generalize :)
@@Mr.Honest247 It´s easy say it, but hard to do... At least for me, yes.
God bless you and make your depression be healed
I like how he is trying so hard to not sound romantic 🤣
💖😍🌷🔥💖🔥💖🔥💖🔥💖🔥🌷🔥
Romance is dead lol
@@Matthew-oe2fxdamn why say dat
@@zalenn45 I've had some time to think to be honest with you man and I think that ive just been looking in the wrong places.
@@Matthew-oe2fxExactly. I admire you for realising that. Too much cynicism and dismissal of love/romance these days. Love is the meaning of life. Much love to you. ❤
Fear of rejection is what holds most people from getting the person they want. Everyone has been rejected at least once and it can be traumatizing
Once hurt twice shy. Easier to say than to do. I don't blame ppl who don't wanna get rejected over and over again. It's their choice and their lives. I send them a big hug, they are better than what meets the eye.
@Marsonic lmao what an incel take. All women have never been rejected? How many days of your life have you been a woman?
Been rejected many times throughout my life even if i wanted to be their friend they turned their backs on me and never gave a hoot about me
@Marsonic ahh yes, women are the ones who have 'easymode' lmao🤣 the delusions.
It is traumatizing.
“Maybe that’ll be good enough...” I think that line was so underrated..
The "maybe" was underrated or "good enough" was underrated?
Thanks again, Internet Dad. I was waiting expectantly to hear some really realistic, downright pessimistic thing that we’d probably missed the boat, but JP goes around and says something completely realistic, but not at all pessimistic thing that just says that, yes life sucks, but do the right things anyways. And sometimes life will surprise you.
Apps for dating are certainly inferior dont get why anyone would get offended by that as a fact. Because you find people there which is nothing good. Id rather meet in face to face. Oh and i smell people. From far away my uncle says im weird but its all the nose i swear i dont get too close its simply the strong smell those people have as their armpits or body. Now ill try reading their minds oh wait thats an invasion of privacy nvm.
@@IsraelCountryCube apps are for getting dates, they don't replace it. they only replace the first sight. so its the same like every other date you have in "real life". the problem is when people write weeks and maybe never date. this is not what they are made for.
How stupid do you have to be not to figure out this things by yourself?
I see him, like my internet dad, just like you. He helps me a lot.
@@bsg806 Lets find out. What is Love?
And make sure that person is a life partner you can tolerate. Remember looks change, money comes and goes. But if you can't stand the person you wake-up next to each day. You're not just wasting your time but their's.
Your cute, what's your story ☺
@@oscarbear7498 Bro down bad! I guess you're putting yourself out there.
shooting my shot, I like this girl
@@oscarbear7498 You're*
@@humanname6534 I was gunna put ur
But felt fancy 😎
Dating sites are the worst places to find "love", especially for a guy. I recommend NOT searching for love, either online of offline. The best way to find someone is through your personal journey, meaning its best for you to focus on your career, hobbies, be a good person, and eventually you will have people attracted to you.
You can focus on your career as well as also pursuing someone you're attracted to, but I get your point. My own philosophy is to just do it when I feel like I can take that responsibility of having a relationship with someone.
Yep, I've seen people's egos shattered when they get 1 match per week.
"eventually".. I'm almost 34 and a female.
@@trmp9923 Well, my advice was for men, can't speak for women. Focusing in career is never a good idea for women, but thats just my uneducated opinion and based on my personal experience with 50 year old women that focused on career and now are lonely.
@@LittleBoxXx If you tell women not to focus on career, what are the chances that she'll find a 'providing alpha man'? Men are into different things some would actually prefer a woman who is focused on her career and still want to provide for her while others would want a stay at home woman...
Don't cut yourself short just because you're trying to find somebody, be your authentic self and chase your heart's desire (if it's right for you) that way you won't end up frustrated, sad, UNFULFILLED and also 'lonely'
Don't recommend looking for "love" online. There will be scores of people there, not always with the best of motives. Some guys just looking for sex. A better way is to enrol in a live class in a subject that interests you. That way if you meet someone, he/she is there to learn, you can also see them face to face and not behind a screen.
You share a common interest, they are not there from ulterior motives and at the end of the day, whether you find a love interest or not, you will have learnt something and increased your knowledge base. A win-win scenario I would say.
“Some guys are just looking for sex”? Brief correction, all guys are just looking for sex online.
@@KelticTim
omg shut up you feminist thing
@@johanv247 I’m a feminist? Lmao. Why, because I know how men think? Being a man with a working libido, and knowing many others just like me is what gave me that insight, not because I’m a “feminist” (that’s a first btw, normally I’m called a misogynist) you bag of douche.
@@KelticTim oh sorry i misunderstood you .. obviously you're not a feminist... you're just an idiot ... im a man and I'm not and was never a disgusting one that looks just for sex online... so dont generalize ... just because you and your pathetic friends are doesn't mean every man is .
grow up man !!!!
@@johanv247 oh fuck off man. Don’t white Knight me. All men think with their dicks first. Some, like you, just like to pretend you’re “one of the good ones”. Just because you’re looking for sex, and maybe a relationship too, doesn’t mean you’re an asshole or whatever, you can admit your wants and still be a good man. I’ve never personally had an online dating whatever, but after just getting out of a 10yr marriage, I’m considering it. And yes, I’ll be looking for a relationship, but only with women I’d like to have sex with, and you are too, unless you wanna keep pretending that you’d get into a relationship with a woman you don’t find sexually attractive. Go ahead and tell that lie.
This guy is always sincere and well informed.
I’m glad he didn’t say all you need to do is love yourself🤓
“Do what you can to be attractive to the people you want to be attracted to you” is incredible advice. I’ve had so many friends either believing they had to settle for less than they desired, or accusing those perceived out of their league as being shallow for not overlooking their (often fixable) flaws.
You can do better! Focus on personal development to become the type of person you and others can be proud of - not only do you deserve better, but your future potential partner deserves it as well.
Well, although I agree with being your best self, I don't agree with deserving such a partner that is also the best, but that doesn't mean I believe I don't deserve one either.
As for settling, everyone technically settles, no one can be "perfect" it's just a matter of what you're going to be willing to put up with or not and imo, if you aren't will to put up with people who got it bad for them, even though they haven't necessarily compromised any of the values you hold dear to you, then maybe you shouldn't have a long term partner? (Because if you can't accept the fact that people make mistakes or just aren't going to be "the best", then you're not gonna be able to truly accept anyone and nither will they.)
@IyokuUnlimited true
You can’t make yourself attractive to a demographic entirely. Because no demographic is monolithic in what it’s attracted to. Amongst gays, some men like masculine men, some like feminine men.
Why most humans think that finding romantic love/ your so call other half/twin flame etc etc is a MUST OF THE HUMAN EXPERIENCE. Certain things will not happen in your journey for instance the person that wants to be a ballet dancer but that unfortunately does not happen either due to an injury or does not get accepted to a dance school or the person that plans to be a neurosurgeon but does not get accepted to medical school; some experiences, lessons, and paths will not take place in your journey through this lifetime, and one of them could be romantic love. Many will experience other types of love but romantic love might not be in their life journey so why, why humans cannot accept that as a possibility?
@@kintsukuroi6300exactly. We are wired to desire romantic love but some of us will never get it. There is no improvement that can make an invisible man all of a sudden turn into a man married to a good wife. Never.
"You don't get what you don't aim at.
You might get what you do aim at.
And your aim might get better as you aim, as well."
JP
Would you be able to link to a clip of this quote, please?
@@regulareverydayhalfbirdguy Im sorry. It's in one of his videos. I rewound it a few times to get it exactly right, so it's an exact quote. I wish I knew which video it was in. It's a great one.
@@ohdear2275 That's alright, thank you for taking the time to reply, and for the quote.
@@regulareverydayhalfbirdguy I wrote it in my journal so I was careful to get it exactly right. I've watched so many of his, I have no idea which one it is. I'm sorry.
@@ohdear2275 No worries. Good that you have captured it.
A wise man once said “who by worrying can add one cubit to his stature” “sufficient for the day is its own trouble”. He ask for your faith in him! You would be surprised what He could do for you’re worries! Add that to your message JP for the recipe of a perfect solution! Though it’s easier said than done
All Praises to The Most High Yah
Glory to Yahawashi Ha Maschiach
He is Risen 🙏🏾
"Surrender your affairs to me, and everything will be peaceful."
-Jesus to Don Dolindo Ruotolo
Look up the 'Novena of Surrender' and 'Conversation of the Merciful God With a Sinful Soul'.
The simplicity of this is amazing. Just be you, try, you WILL fail, move forward and keep trying and you will succeed.
That's true 100%
Yeah thats not true at all, loads of guys try al their lives and dont get even a date, that bs is for women, i apologize if you are a woman as it wil happen for you 100% guaranted but if you are a guy reading this, no no it wownt definatly happen, it could well not, i know this because its happened to me and ive never had a gf in my life ! and im 45 yrs old, so no thats a load of bs
@@mcpartridgeboyYou have a point, but you also spit some bs there
Being a woman does not guarantee anything, sure they're probably more likely to, but guarantee? 100%? Nah fam
@@Yusa_Beach ive never met one who couldnt get a date, ive never met anyone who has met one who couldnt get a date, ive been told by many women online who at first pretended they couldnt but then it turns out they had no "quality" offers, and these were women that argued hardcare that dating wasnt a gender issue ! ive never heard of one that couldnt get one even online from women who prwtend dating is hard for women ! so idk, there may be one very heavily disabled woman possiby, but its exceptionally rare !
@@mcpartridgeboyI don't want to sound harsh but that has something to do with you, not them. Identify what's holding you back from attracting people, maybe it's your appearance or more likely your behaviour and general vibe. Then work out how to fix it, because it can be fixed, and it won't be too hard either. Do a lot of introspection about your life and how you've treated people, how you've presented yourself and how others reacted. Your attitude and worldview is also crucial. Cynicism is poisonious to both the cynic and the people he interacts with. Open your mind and your heart. Don't make excuses. I could go on but I think you get the idea. Much love to you. ❤
In just a word, "Try". This is how everything in life works. Try and if you fail, try once again. Work, relatonships, everything. Thank you mr Peterson.
The problem with that is with women the more you try the worse results you get, but also if you dont try you also get bad results, so trying is irrelivent you need to become a good pick up artist to have any hope of getting a gf nowadays ! which is basically try but manipulate her so it looks like you are not trying which takes a hell of a lot of skill unfortunatly !
@mcpartridgeboy This is the advice men give other men and it's exactly why it doesn't work out. You have no clue what woman really want and need. Stop taking advice from other guys who also don't really have a clue. Take advice from men who have been married 20+ years and know how to get and KEEP a good woman.
I'm 29. I'm not even looking for love at this point. Maybe having at least one girlfriend in my life would be nice
I feel the pain man, but just keep moving forward, ask yourself if you're doing the best you can do to maximise the probability that a girl would go out with you and then work towards improving it.
@@nadav3695 the only thing i can think of is being more in shape but tbf I'm not that bad
I really have a confidence issue and have no idea how to fix it.
@@dominick951 ok where can i meet you :p
@Jhulir the two girls random girls I mean come on. Na gonna trust that. But I have been working of me being in shape. Hoping for the best
@@dominick951 best of luck on ur gains, this is probably only stating the obvious but theres a lot of good vids on youtube to help you out
Rather than trying to find love, try to nurture it with people you know. Love is developed over long periods of time. People often misattribute attraction for love. Attraction is ephemeral, love is resilient. It can endures a lot before it actually fades.
Yeah- so far the best couplings I've seen are from christians and the christian youth group. They are matrue and know each other willing to love the person as a person and not as a lover.
As- man! are we bad to our lovers when we don't love the person.
I watch a lot of these clips. This one stands out as being just the right gentle, sweet response. Very compassionate and nice to see where there is so many harsh clips on these short videos.
Don't chase love, money or success. Become the best version of you and those things will chase you.
The fuck does this even mean
@@DwayneGoggins no way man! Never figured that!
@@lamefuqq6985I guess it means to do what you want to do, so if you want to find love, to which what you define it as someone who cares for you a lot and is willing to also experience intimacy with you then do what needs to be done.
@@Yusa_Beach cool
I'm not worried that I'll never "find love," I'm just worried about being alone for the rest of my life. The problem for me is, I really don't "want" love. I don't try to put myself out there, I'm not very social, the idea of being in a relationship sounds like it'd be more stressful than fulfilling for me right now. And quite frankly I don't think I have the capability of "loving" people who aren't my family. But this comes with the price of being forever alone.
My fear is that I'll die old and alone, with no one that cares for me and my existence a memory that the world quickly forgets.
A relationship currently sounds like a bad idea because I don't want to subject anyone to being with me.
Edit: I should clarify that it's a part of me that thinks and feels this way, not my whole being. This part of me can be quite loud and convincing, though, drowning out the more optimistic, positive, hopeful parts.
I, I, I. You're only talking about yourself
@@alinpetrescu2309 not exactly a solution, but it is important for him/her to notice all those I's.
Its a step in the right direction. Love and relationships are two way streets. It's not always comfortable or exactly by your wishes and needs, but when the realization that you just woke up and you're not alone and actually have someone hits you, it's an irreplaceable feeling that sticks with you.
There are assholes out there though, ngl
@@alinpetrescu2309 who else am I gonna talk about, I'm not in anyone else's body 😑
Gonna tell u straigt, u'll be alone like this
"Maybe that'll be good enough."
I've been trying all that for twelve years now ... it's definitely not good enough.
It’s a journey dear
I came down with the same answer
I love how he admits the uncertainty of it but assures us that we'll regret if we don't try.
The amount of lives this man saved and improved... he is the hero we dont deserve but we badly needet
That’s beautiful. I love how you simply explain things that everyone can understand. We hope….
You don't find love. You give it. The rest will take care of itself.
Not necessarily, and that has to be ok.
@@samanthathompson9812yes and that maybe good enough
A down-to-earth and straightforward answer. I love it.
Jordan Peterson's tone is like: "🙄😒" He's sick of y'all's shit about "love" 😂💞
How are you doing today
I deepened my spiritual life and I no longer worry about finding love. I have peace.
I choose to stay alone. I prioritize my peace and well being. ❤
This man is very nice. I really don't get why some people hate him.
So is creating a profile on dating apps/social media the right way? NOPE, not at all. It's only gonna lead you to worse depression. You just have to get over the fact 1.that love is subjective and it's not everything 2.Sometimes looking for love is the worse thing you can do, the more you try the more suffering without results 3.Love is overrated, you might not be as fulfilled as you think anyway after you find someone. CONCLUSION: live your life as if love doesn't exist. Ask yourself: what would I do if I didn't care about love? Would I go to that trip? Would I take on this hobby? Would I hang out with these people? If the answer is no, STOP. You are desperately looking for love in the wrong places. Love MIGHT find you but you must first stop trying so hard
I was single for so long being introverted and cheated on at the end of high school and not having many reliable social circles basically non existing. So when I finally met someone I liked I didn't know what to Do. Did I forget how to fall in love again or was I too scared to even consider my feelings. Not until she left Australia back to her home in Japan almost 12 months ago did I realize my mistake. Next time I will remember not to let go so easily
idk know man ive got autism and i thought the same thing so i got clingy and that puts women off way quicker than being nonchelant about her leaving !
Hey Jordan you are awesome and we are bigger than any obstacle in this world. Be it withdrawal or loneliness
I've been doing everything you said for many years now my dear Dr. Peterson. I have a job I'm proud of (software engineer), I just bought a lovely apartment at a great neighborhood, I try to eat right and exercise regularly. I'm not amazing looking but I put effort into it. I'm 34, a bit above average height and quite lean/muscular. I play the guitar and read books and have many other interests.
I've dated hundreds of women by now. That's not a brag. I haven't gotten into sexual intimacy with any but a few. Those I really wanted did not want me back. I try not to fall for all the obvious traps like showing I'm too enthusiastic too soon, or anything like that. I always pick the lady up from home and bring her back, pay for the date or put effort with good wine and fruit if it's a park date and basically try my best to be a gentleman.
Still alone and don't know what to do anymore :(
Maybe you put too much effort into the dates. Just decide where you meet (don't pick her up and bring her back home) and split the bill. Or just go for drinks that's cheaper and sometimes more fun. I think there are hardly any women who appreciate this "Gentleman" like behaviour.
@@JS-vo3ok In my country most ladies don't own cars, some even don't have a driver's license. Those who do, do not use it much. It's pretty rare to see one that does. So in most cases I didn't even have a choice about picking them up. Also, splitting the bill is considered very taboo and most ladies will see it as a deal breaker if a guy even hints at it. So those are not the issues, it's just a cultural thing here in general, it's not just me.
@@Dimitris_Half ...? Huh?
"I've very attractive, I've dated hundreds of women, but I'm still alone."
Yeah, right.
@@Dimitris_Half it's literally my life.. what exactly am I lying about so "obviously"?
Also why would I lie? I'm saying I'm miserable in case you didn't notice. Why would anyone lie about being miserable?
Those who worry they will never find love typically have more worry than drive in their life. I love his advice, increase your probabilities and embrace the struggle as part of life.
Most people don't want the struggle, I think that's where the problem starts 🤷🏾♀️ shame
This is the best dating advice I think I've ever found on RUclips. I've never personally found it "difficult" but there's so many videos and channels on this platform that tailor to helping people find these secrets, but this is just as simple as it is. You gotta love yourself first or you won't have anything to offer another. Then, baby steps...
I’ve found love.
…she just didn’t love me back. She meant the world to me.
It didn’t help that I pushed her away with my own damn insecurities…
I really miss her. She can’t stand me now, though…
Going through something similar
It would be hard to find love in a loveless world.
Facts. Love is just temporary lust.
n its hard for men to find love, women get literally thosands of offers of love every week some thosands every day, women have literally never had it so easy in their entire history of humanoity lol, so its only hard for all men ! for all women its easier than ordering pizza ! literally !
@@dontreply69that is what most people mislabel as love. It is not love. Though yes, the increasing issue of that mislabeling causes the problem occuring.
If there is one person to take advice from… it is Jordan Peterson.
I’m so glad this man exists
I've tried all that and never succeeded.
The reason is because I hope. I hoped that I will find someone. I hoped that I won't stay alone forever. So when my efforts don't bear fruit, I get disappointed and feel like I didn't try hard enough or that I'm not worthy to find it. But no, I am worthy, and I did try my best.
What I've learnt is that putting too much hope into something might or might not happen is a dumb way to live because when it doesn't pan out the way you'd want to, you feel disappointed and even worse, you might even be depressed.
The lesson that I've learnt is that I shouldn't be hoping too much. I'm fine where I'm at. I don't pressure myself to find love. If it happens, it happens. I find myself being more calm, more neutral. I can see that I can finally have joy in the little things in life. I also took relationship/love/marriage etc from the pedestal and put it on parr with being single. I'm more stoic than ever. It can be hard to come to terms with the possibility of never finding love, but it's worthwhile journey on its own. I'm never ever going to lie to myself that "someone is out there for me". Because it may very well be that no one is there 😅.
I watch this and I still have the thoughts to myself “I am not good enough for anyone”. I am worried I will never be enough for someone and worried of rejection.
Doing this makes it worse. But also trying to help someone to see how great they are, doesn't do much good either.
You have to see it for yourself first. I found a 'nice guy' who had very low self esteem, I told him how great he was bc I could see who he was behind the masks he wore (for a few years might I add), but didn't do me any good. So now I know let them find out for themselves if they want to 🤷🏾♀️ IF they want to put the work in for themselves.
@@bananarae9207 I am prepared to put the said work in. I am going to therapy and working on my flaws ( working out at gym to lose weight and sort myself out )
Simple but good advice for everyone! And a very positive outlook. Thank you JP!
... ... all flawed advice ... JP admits himself that attraction is unknown ... so finding love outside of family, through biased groups and people without your best interests is unsurprisingly vague ...
@@dn1697 So don't put yourself out there, improve yourself? I disagree with you. Anything you can do to make yourself look better will not hurt you.
@@Killgore52 ... I'm definitely out there .... in Spain from England without language skills ... turned my life upside down ... more complex that can be articulated on here.
I've never been so reassured about not finding love in just one minute, masterfully done
This is like, the best delivery of any message he's given in the sense of it's apparent nature, as well as the message being plain and simple to begin with. Something inexplicably nice about that.
I'd say that step one is to love yourself unconditionally, while working towards making yourself the best best version of you that you can be.
Just become enlightened, bruh.
I'm not worried about it, because I know it will never happen, so worrying is pointless.
I used to think no one would ever love me... and then no one ever did. So what
It's smart to keep yourself open and aware
Though yeah- I don't have romantic desires so I am very unlikely to find love that makes me happy and doesn't hurt me more than anything.
It’s taken a half a century of numerous mistakes to be able to say with complete acceptance that UNTIL WE LOVE ❤️ OURSELVES & forgive ourselves of past mistakes we surely can not expect someone else to love us until we love ourselves! ❤❤❤I pray that more people need to actually understand that the problem starts with us not loving ourselves! The sooner you love yourself others will magnify to you and love you unconditionally ❤
the problem with society is that we are too fixated in finding “the one” but never stop and think if we are worthy enough for “the one”
Nah, dating sites will only knock you down even further if you're an average looking male. It all basically boils down to looks or power (i.e. money) and if you don't have one of these, you're fucked. That's why my only wish is to forget it all and find some sort of comfort in being alone, no matter how bleak and depressing such a life may seem.
not at all... but if you look for someone who is similar to you then you will find someone. Some will indeed get more chances but all you need is one right. You have to be in it to win it, if you leave the game early then you've already lost. Sometimes we over shoot and that can be an issue also, we all have to be realistic.
I love you Professor Peterson! ❤️❤️❤️❤️
Do you know you look so beautiful I would like to know you
Life is easy with you Jordan🖤
Respects
Damn. What a fucking dad. Love you, JP ❤
I've accepted it.
I love this guy his smart kind and really wants to make the world I’m so totally jealous of his wife lol
*If you want love that will never abandon you, learn to love yourself.*
And, if another person is mean to you, walk away and find someone who will be nice to you.
This is the wisdom I've gained after 68 years of making mistakes. I was a slow learner.
Be the person you would like to have in your life ❤
I think I enjoy being single (been about 18 months) after 19 years of not being single, but I do get lonely from time to time. The thing is, I am now 35 and not getting any younger and I wonder if this single life is sustainable, or if I'll grow old and regret not trying to get back out there, because I'm not trying to date anymore. Is this normal?
I have that same concern. I think it’s because of the fact that we do grow old and die that feelings of loneliness come up from time to time.
Suppose we were immortal and that we can neither age nor die. Would us single Pringles be content staying single? Would we feel those same bouts of loneliness as frequently as you would right now? I argue we’ll eventually get lonely, but used to this feeling over time. We’ll likely just become more bored than lonely, wouldn’t you say? Not something we humans can’t handle. Emotions are natural, but another fabric weaved into the human condition.
If you feel that you’re better off single despite your worries, then you will have no problem staying so in a hundred or thousand years. But, if you feel that cashing in a relationship is actually more fulfilling, go for it while you’re in the here and now.
What you’re feeling is normal, but there’s a saying when engaging in anything: “If you drink water, remember the source.”
Growing old is pretty shit no matter what you do. My older neighbor who was in a happy marriage and has kids had to see his wife slowly decline and die in front of him. Truth is everyone dies horribly and if you are lucky you will have loved ones around to watch you suffer.
@@ponternal what a cynical and horrible outlook on aging. I feel sorry for you bud, you sound miserable. Men get better with age as long as you put in the work. Women only need to worry about having children in time. Aging is a beautiful process if you played your cards right, I’m assuming you haven’t. Not everyone dies horribly. Lots of people die peacefully in their sleep, in the arms of a loved one, etc. Get help.
@@TLongUSA97 I don’t think it’s cynical. I think he’s right, maybe not for all but majority of us will suffer at some point in life and lose loved ones. Some of us are/will be lucky enough to age graciously but some are and will be suffering. Stop calling people miserable because they don’t romanticise getting old and dying!
People can get lonely even being married or having friends. Its not about being just single. But know that God will never leave you nor forsake you if you believe in Jesus. Don’t date if you believe its not for you. Even if you change your mind 20yrs later, there are still opportunities to meet someone special for you. It just sounded that you had a past that can be addressed, seek help if needed. Once you are healed then you are ready to be out there for that special one at the right time. Just enjoy each day God gives!
If you’re trying to find love, go to a hopeless place. That’s where Rihanna found her true love, her umbrella.
Wouldn't take advice from that witch
I think thats kinda true since people who have nothing will aprreciate something more than how normal people do
Having been left by the love of my life. I know I'll never meet anyone ever again. No matter how i improve my life, i cant allow someone that close again. Women no longer make the effort to connect with someone. Or to allow connection to happen at all. Society has ruined dating. Its days like these i question why im doing all this work. Maybe tomorrow will be better. But i know it won't be
Jordan Peterson and Miss Manners agree. 😊 Get out there. Join groups that enjoy doing what you enjoy doing on the "birds of a feather" principle. You might meet your mate. Do good things for your family members, friends, neighbors and co-workers. They might introduce you to someone they think you'll like. Attend social events -- parties, cookouts, receptions, faith group gatherings (e.g., church picnic), sporting events, book clubs, golf tournaments, and so on. Good luck is when preparation meets opportunity. Don't chase The One, but make a habit of creating opportunities to meet new people.
This was so deep on so many levels...🤔
I gave up on that myth a long time ago. I find my solitude peaceful for the most part.
At least you have your dog, assuming it's yours anyway lol
@@hermitkrab792 she was my daughter for 15yrs. Love of my life
@@KozueMegami so you failed to find love?
Quitters never win and winners never quit. Always remember that. We live in a world of constant maintenance, you’re either evolving or deteriorating. I could tell by the way you speak, you possess a lot of stubbornness so I wouldn’t be surprised if you don’t listen to me.
@@Mr.Honest247 No-one evolves after 60
Just accept it. You’re unable to be vulnerable and intimate with a partner. The earlier you accept it, the better. Don’t string people along.
I gave up on love in general at 25. 30 now. Yes it sucks sometimes, but not playing a game you cannot win is a lot better for peace of mind and allows you to concentrate on other things.
It looks as though I'm going to lose my fiancée. The Algorithm is definitely on point!
How you feeling bro?
@@hermitkrab792 Broken, yet determined, if that makes any sense.
I just have to take these lessons with me and build a better tomorrow out of them.
It's situations like these that make me happy I'm single. Yeah, I have a cynical view.... but, that "view" is protecting me from the pain that comes from betrayal, heartbreak, and even trauma. Shitty relationships can certainly be traumatizing. I don't know if I want to take that risk again..
@@Feber2001 I'd say roll with the punches and push forward. Family is too important to give up on. (Not to say that you can't find fulfillment down other paths)
@@steampowered6883 Your view is too optimistic and bound for failure.... at least for me. I don't want to get betrayed again. I've been in therapy for a year because of it. I don't think I can handle another heartbreak like that
Those things never worked for me.
Then there came a stalker that wouldn't leave me the hell alone.
God I wish that were me..
@@JoeMama69xx You WANT a stalker?
@@toomuchinformation Of course, it is my only true dream
@@JoeMama69xx Well, they're less likely to kill you, so that must help.
@@toomuchinformation So you're telling me there's a chance..
JP you are such a gem. God bless you man
The real worry should be - I’m worried I will never love myself as much as the need for someone else’s love .
I can find love, but this love won't be the one i want. This is the problem. My love is too idealized, I guess.
I did have a girl in my life once but before it became anything serious I messed it up because I was so paranoid. I had such low self esteem that I literally could not believe she was with me because she liked me. I basically lost my mind. thought she was sleeping with other guys or making fun of me behind my back. I got angry at her often basically accusing her of such things. Never said it directly but just went on and on about her male friends and stuff like that. She didn't want to put up with it anymore. That was 3 years ago. I still miss her sometimes, and I am still convinced I will never find love.
I literally met her through discord believe it or not, she started talking to me. We met up and spend only about 3 months seeing eachother regularly. I still don't know why or how she was attracted to me. And such a chance encounter is insanely rare. I basically threw away the only oppertunity I had or ever will have to have a partner.
Youre very loveable dr.Peterson.😮
I've just met a very special person. Its very early days , but my intuition is already telling me this is gonna be for the long haul. 35 years old, thought i'd never love again. Thought I'd never get married. Now the possibilities seem boundless all of a sudden. Cos I took action. Thank you Jordan for your priceless advice ❤
Yaaaaaaaaaaay
how did you find this person??
Love yourself first , Work out , stay healthy , educate yourself , set goals in your life...and someone outthere will love to live with you
I do all of those and I'm still single, I'm tired of it
Unfortunately even if you do all those things, love may not come. Still, it is better if you do those things.
Travel overseas and someone will hold you in high steem the moment you put yourself out there. Western society is doomed. 🤮🤮🤮
@@mmors ur doing it wrong
@@rooster555555 how? I workout 4 times a week and meal prep all my food its actually one of my passions i have set and reached multiple financial and career goals for myself and i have many more that i wanna achieve in the future, I'm always learning and looking for ways to learn a new skill or get better at something, I actually love the person I've become and am excited to see what I'll do with my future, how am I doing it wrong?
“And maybe that (love) will be good enough.” Damn. Sadly, the dating app culture has screwed with any “good enough” theory. 😢
It's mostly hook up culture and believe it or not we not all into that.
Love finds you, you attract what you put out. Love yourself always first & heal yourself
I found love in my 40s after being single for just about all of my life. I totally didn't expect it to happen, but it happened.
Congrats. 🎉
@@jakeblitzcoffie4859 Thanks, I'm a lucky SOB, that's for sure.
Does my computer count? I clean it every 2 months, I don't bloat it, I make sure to delete trash files, I don't overclock it too much and I also upgrade it every couple years so we together can keep up with the games that challenge us. Granted, I overuse it sometimes I give it time for itself when I'm at work or out with friends. It's perfect and it's enough for me, for now.
Them brows thooooo.! ;)
You should see my brows and lashes you would fall in love 😍
@@taylorb4119 JP would be great in a Dracula movie with those bad boys ;)
@@nikkijackson2981 Hahaha!! Definitely!! ;)
Is it okay for us to get
Very well said
Love is really just a drug to ease the fear and uneasiness of loneliness but that fear will be waiting for you once the drug wears off, in the end there’s really no difference from living alone.
-A manga
Wow as simple as that.
I ll come back and watch this again everyday.
Hoping to find love or even good friends
Hahahahah
I will genuinely never find love.
Same
Probably might die alone and nobody will miss me when i grow old and it's my time to die
@@mikhailabunidal9146 Dont ever think that, there is always hope! Even in the darkest of times!
Vic Vinegar, I have similar fear but I prefer to keep my hopes high.
@@courtney8475 You should. Dont be like me and abandon hope. Stay positive
"You act in spite of your worry" 👏🏻
This dude is so on point, it's unbelievable
"make a dating profile" wow truly million dollar advice from the world's smartest man.
Mr. Peterson has clearly never been at the online dating scene 🙃
I prefer the idea of realizing love than "finding it". True love is already there, but the heart must be open to understand that.
i don't think you can call it true love when she/he falls for your money or good looking. the feels that are inside are matter.
hmm,,,unfortunately people start to love people outside in.....rare cases hv been seen the other way around
Well it won't be good enough...
This is funny😂, simplistic and straight to the point. Love it 😅
That was so heartfelt and sweet
You know, has anyone ever stopped to think that maybe you should just live in love, if you want love, become love, and learn to love yourself.
Why is enforced that having another person is the ultimate goal in life ??? It is totally fine and amazing to be you by yourself.
I stopped caring. My goals are more important.
Every time I hear this, I cry. It's a validation I didn't know I needed 💕
damn, i am already doing all that and still worry i won't find my love... i am 39 soon...
Most people become feel much more alone in relationships than when alone. Because no one truly understands what it means to enter that 'ship'. It's highly underestimated. Hardly anyone is bothered to do some true self work and step into some silly 'partnership' to then project all their shit on and into and so they will eventually break down and learn some of it (if the breakdown has been deep enough)
Well ... Your views are nice... So according to you what exactly a relationship is??? ☺️