What To Do When Your Child Bites To Actually Get Them to Stop
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- Опубликовано: 25 янв 2022
- When your baby or toddler first bites you, a family member, or another child, the way you respond to that behavior has a huge impact on whether it continues or not.
Surprisingly, some things we naturally do when our child bites actually causes them to continue to do it, rather than stopping it.
So what should you do? That's what you'll learn in this video - how to respond when you've got a baby or toddler biting you or others.
It's normal for young children to bite at some stage in their lives. Generally they bite because it's an effective way to get interaction or attention from a peer or adult. It's actually a very effective way to do that.
Once we understand why they bite, the good news is there are some simple strategies you can use in response to biting that will indicate to your child that it's not ok. It's also important to note that that these aren't harsh, and don't involve yelling or physical forms of discipline. But they are highly effective at stopping toddler biting (and babies - any age really).
If you're struggling with toddler biting, or biting at any age, this video will help!
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Thanks for watching! When does your little one bite or has your little one bitten you or someone else?
Great video Emma! My son is 10months old and he usually bites me and my husband when we are putting him to bed. He seems to think it’s cozy and fun. I’m hoping it’s a passing phase and that he won’t bite other children when he’s older
@@safilouyoga5571 thanks so much for sharing! I think you are right. He might be doing it as a sign of protest or because he thinks it is fun. If you keep your response to the biting minimal and continue to put him to bed (rather than engage in play or a conversation) then he should soon realise the biting is not meeting his needs and stop.
How can we improve this behavior if the baby is too little? My baby has 1 year but she bites since 3 months old, she always bites me, my husband and my mother, she does not talk yet and I don’t know how to make her stop biting, she has a lot of attention all the time, I don’t think she is looking for attention.
Same, my 9 month old bites but it's not limited to a specific time or situation. I usually say "no biting, we are kind" or "oh no, that hurt mummy, we don't do that" and then either sit her with her toys or if I'm holding her I pull her away. She looks at me to say she gets it but still does it later on. I'm worried this behaviour will carry on, she's bitten her brother and also bites my partner (he doesn't help much as he laughs when she does it).
He actually bites me when he's really happy and excited. He is 11 months old.
I start with “biting is not okay” then go on to the other statements. I also end with “biting is not okay”. Repetition is key with little people.
Ughhhh it always involves us staying calm! Sooo hard! 😭🤣
I agree! Staying calm is the hardest part. Especially with toddlers who can be very challenging at times!
That is why they are called, "children" and parents are called, "adults".
@@kkkkkkk7 that's not why those terms exist. Those terms exist because those are the words attached to the people of that age group.
@@manehbag732 if someone observes an adult behaving like a child...those terms are verbs and adjectives.
@@kkkkkkk7 ok
So how does this work in a daycare setting? I've worked in daycares where we had biters, but they weren't having any emotional meltdowns. They just seemed to have done it because they felt like it. How do you approach them about what feelings they're experiencing if they're perfectly calm? Also, how does the removal method work in a classroom setting? Finally what about the younger ones who aren't yet capable of having the "no biting" discussion you described?
I noticed when my daughter 12m bites me with no emotions she is overstimulated or needs attention. Usually there are some warning signs first. She starts wining and pulling her ears if she is overstimulated and if she needs attention she has been trying to get me to pick her up.
This could be teething too@@munchingmakenna5776
The only channel to explain how to get them to stop in detail, and I’ve been searching for an hour. Thank you ☺️! This was very informative and helpful!
I am a mom for the first time. Your videos really help me. Glad I discovered you on time. My parenting is more effective and loving. Thanks!
You are so welcome!
Emma, I've learned so much from you, and as a result my toddler is a lot happier, and gets over his tantrums quicker. Thank you!
"Doing physical punishment does not stop biting behavior"
I had an experience with my two year old, he started biting his mum, i came home after work and heard my wife sobbing, i asked what was wrong then she showed me two fresh bite mark on her waist, I asked how long ago it happened ,she said about 10 sec ago, so i calmly picked up my kid , we had an eye contact then flicked his mouth, my son was shocked, then I said, mouth not for biting, its for food, he cried , i repeated mouth not for biting, its for eating food.. then repeated, not for biting, for eating. . .(and my son finished the sentence) food.
I feel really bad that i resorted to it but i am glad he never bit again and avoided hurting other kids.
My logic is probably flawed but i thought, this toddlers don't understand words fully yet so I had to make a quick connection that he can figure out, (especially with cases where its repeated and potentially can harm other toddler around him)
biting = pain in my mouth
He has long forgotten about it but I will ask an apology again when he is old enough to really understand an apology.
This video have great information, and wished ive seen it before, but we are planning to have more kids so i think i am better equipped next time. :)
my daughter Ashley
she is happened biting wrong her cried month
eating baby food biting at her bowl
Thank you so much for this, I've watched several of your videos now and I am so grateful to be learning how to be a better parent (and actually a better person when it comes to communicating with others no matter their age) because of the helpful information you provide. Your videos are informative, consice, and very well put together. I appreciate the effort you put in to making these videos because you're helping others to be better versions of themselves. Thanks again!
Oh god!! Once again right on time. This lady is reading my mind, so grateful to you Emma.
😂 hopefully it helps!
Same! I feel like every time I have an issue- Emma posts a video on it! Now I just need a video on getting my daughter to point! She loves to clap and wave but has zero interest in pointing!
@@melissaarsenault5218 so glad to hear these videos are helpful. Great to hear your little one is clapping and waving. How old is your little one? The ability to point at things can occur between 9 - 14 months of age. You can encourage our little one to point by pointing at items yourself (modelling how to point) and if your little one in unable to isolate their index finger provide play opportunities to develop this skill. Hope that helps!
Same! Her videos are so timely!
Same!
Biting and smacking is happening right now with my almost 19 month old. He gets upset and snacks me when he has mini tantrums. Thank you for this video Emma, much appreciated.
Hi @FitAussieAngie no worries at all. Hope this tip helps. Also how is your little ones walking going?
Hi Angie. My son is now in the same age like your was when the biting started. The calm technique doesn’t really work, he just bites me 100x in a row, but there is no reason for it and he doesn’t undestand the explaining part yet. I don’t know how to make it stop. How did it go with yours? How long did it take to work? Do you have any tip?
@barborasenitkova6602 Hi, Have you found any technique to stop bitting.
Sooo awesome to see you teaching emotion coaching! I read the research on how great it is, and it helps me to see applications to toddlers
Hi @Becca great to hear you are researching this topic and trying to apply it into your day. It is a very important skill we need to teach our little one!
I REALLY NEEDED THIS, THANK YOU DEAR EMMA!!!!
This is wonderfully explained! Thank you!!!
Thanks so much. Hopefully it helps!
Thanks for the tricks!
Thank you so much for this!
This is REALLY good advice! Thank you!!
It's my pleasure!
If your kiddo is mid clamp squeeze their cheeks inward. You’ll find just the amount of pressure to make them let go. Same with grabbing hair. Press their hand into your scalp so their hand flattens. Neither move needs excessive force.
Thank you❤
Wow!!! Our babysitter told us yesterday that Bubs tried to bite another kids finger. So perfect timing!
I give more attention and condolences to the child that was hit/bitten. Seems to help discourage the bad behavior when they know it won't bring too much attention upon themselves but to someone else.
Role play idea is perfect!!
Glad you like that one 🙂
Great info, thanks! How about biting during breastfeeding.... Excruciating pain :)
Thank you I so been looking. For video like this to help a new mom like also I hope I come across. To toddler sibling fighting thank you so much
Great video! My 2 year old pulls my hair, then when I thought things were getting better he started pulling his own when mad. Thank you for the tips, I will put some to practice ASAP. :)
Can't believe, I have to check on myself every week with you on the new tantrums my toddler is throwing. It's scratching for now but I get the point. Thank you for these awesome videos!
My son is also scratching right now so I'm hoping this video will apply to scratching also
Emma would you use the same technique for kicking? Thank you for all your help and advice 😊
Absolutely!
Thanks for the info, Emma! My son (16 months old) has bitten only a couple of times (myself and my husband), but it's always in play, not because he's angry or upset. These steps seems pretty applicable still, but is there anything you would change or add for children who bite just to be silly?
"it's okay to get excited and play but it's not okay to bite. These are good ways to play instead." "We can't play anymore because you aren't playing safely. We will play again when you do not bite."
I'd say "OK, you bit me, so we're done playing" and immediately get up and walk away. Communicate the message that biting immediately stops the fun play.
My toddler was biting like a cat would... despite having never been bitten by a cat.
I'm glad it seems to have been short lived & was right before a big leap in vocabulary.
I remember redirecting my child’s negative behavior towards something else like a pillow or biting a blanket. She getting better at managing her emotions at 2.5 years. 💙 Annisa
Thanks so much for sharing!
What if you end up having to run away from your child in order to prevent them from “beating you up” because when you moved so that they wouldn’t bite you, they ran after you? Also, what if they become increasingly more angry if you say that you can see they feel mad and they don’t want you to say that?
Oh gawd how can I answer this without coming across as a total b.....d. I am not saying you should follow my father's example as I am of a different generation. But my father literally threw me off his lap when I bit him as a child. I never forgot it......and I never did it again.
I am not saying that is the answer; only that it worked for me and my dad.
Well follow what the lady says in the video. The experts must know best I am sure.
This is my pennysworth.....maybe in the end it all depends on the child.
Assuming the room they're in is safe, I'd probably move into a different room and close the door or step over a baby gate so they can't access you.
If acknowledging their feelings seems to upset them, try other strategies to help them soothe themselves. Asking them to take a deep breath or count to five (if they can) or telling you some things they see may redirect the anger.
Yeah it's not always about toy it constant war for me through out the day with 2 Yr old
Same thing going on with me
Good job! It’s the first time I actually agree with that approch! You explain it so well and you also talk about the « victim » (Mia). Thank you!
Hi Emma. Thank you for yet another clear, simple and informative video! Just a question on how you would simplify the language for a 22-month-old in this situation. I can imagine this would work well for older toddlers/pre-schoolers and older but might be too much for a nearly 2 year old. My little one has started to bite for fun (affectionately while giggling) and sometimes in the middle of crying, both situations where we are already giving him attention (just having a play or cuddle if he’s hurt himself etc.), so he’s not purposefully trying cause harm or get a reaction from us (I think). Any advice would be appreciated! Thank you 🙏
Great video Emma! Right on time. My 16 mo old son bites me but I notice that it's when he's excited or playing. Same tips apply?
Hi @M Young yep it would be the exact same tips. You would just say "I can see you're excited that _______. It is ok to feel exciting but it is not ok to bite" then move your attention to safety and when your little one is in a space for learning discuss other ways he can show his excitement or play safely (e.g maybe give you a high five when something exciting happens). Hope that helps!
Another great video Emma! So encouraging. My little one is 17 months old and biting. I’m definitely going to use your tips.
Hope it helps!
The best video on this topic on RUclips. I was just looking for this the other day and was not finding anything nearly as thorough and informative as your video. Thank you for sharing.
HI @Nicole Aulbert thanks so much for that huge complimen! ❤I hope the advice proves helpful!
You are awesome l Thank you☺👣
Thanks so much Gayle 😊. I'm glad you're enjoying my videos!
We have our grandson (18 months) and a puppy about the same age. I've noticed grandson mimics what the puppy does. Carrying the ball in his mouth as an example. The puppy will open his mouth to nip nicely when toddler gets annoying. I really think toddler is acting the way the dog does! He will say no biting! The two of them are really good friends☺ it's hard for him to realize the dog can bite but he can't!
Hi Emma. Thanks for the video. It's really useful. My little one is sucking his underlips always. How to divert his from this behavior?
Thanks Emma for sharing this important info and am so glad I have to learn this before my baby becomes a toddler, taking this advice is helping me to realize and correct the mistakes I have made while raising my 2 other boys
Hi Emma, could you please post about how to help feeding babies when the bites.
Helpful
So glad!
Hi Emma! Your video makes so much sense, but I'm having trouble figuring out out how to apply it to our situation. We have a six-week-old baby, and our two-and-a-half year-old daughter keeps biting her, mostly on the face but sometimes on the fingers, as well as poking her, hitting her on the head with books, and so on. My husband and I (as well as the four older children) have tried really hard to make sure our toddler is still getting plenty of attention, since the baby was born, but obviously it's not enough and this is a jealousy issue. Our toddler isn't angry/having a tantrum when she bites the baby; in fact, she often looks at us slyly and smiles right before or after doing it. Since the baby obviously isn't doing anything to provoke the attacks (other than existing!) and our toddler doesn't talk yet, so that makes it hard for us to role-play as you suggested. What do you think would be the best thing to do in our situation? Thanks!
V
Following for reply.
How has it gone for you, are your toddler still acting out or did it resolve?
Also keen to see the response to this as I'm in a similar situation! Please respond @emma
Sounds like a scary situation. If you catch her in the act, can you immediately remove her to a different room for a 2 minute time-out? Then she realises she is left without any attention when she does this attention-seeking behaviour? When you let her out, tell her in very simple words that she must be gentle and demonstrate with a fluffy toy. Demonstrate how to be gentle with the baby too. Show her how to be gentle then let her try, and praise her and give positive attention whenever she does that.
You have amazing content Emma. I follow every video. I'm having a tough time giving medicinal syrups to my toddler. He just refuses to take medicine(when sick) and we have to wrestle him! . Can you pls make a video on how to give medicine to toddlers while maintaining peace.
Brilliant. Thanks. I’m covered in bite marks. My 16 month old seems to bite for fun rather than anger, though.
If they bite during play, I'd say, "You're not playing safely. We're done playing because you bit me (or whoever)." And immediately walk away or move them away from the person they bit.
I have been doing this method for months with no progress and everyone has ideas of how to fix it...the ideas you said not to try because they do not work. And I have tried those methods as well (responding without calm or using it as a teaching moment...) and I agree these methods do not work. But I guess I have to just keep doing what I am doing, not listen to outside voices because these methods make me uncomfortable, and be patient. Maybe it'll just take awhile with my daughter. She scratches too and pulls hair and it is just so frustrating. Thank you for confirming that what I am doing is a good method and for the other tips, especially the roll playing! I hope it helps her to continue to learn.
You are a great parent your kid will be thankful for it in the future and so will you
My son and daughter both struggle with biting. Today I got a message saying my son who just turned 3 threw a block at a lil girl then pushed her down tried to choke her but they said he wasn't even playing near her when it happened. This is blowing my mind. He is at daycare so I'm here for advice
My 10 month old has started biting, but not very hard and it's not very bothersome, just seems like teething behavior. But should we be intercepting this behavior early on? I don't want it to progress into harder biting, but I also don't want to punish him for something that isn't a problem in the same way some toddlers do it.
Hello Preschool & Daycare TA here,
Loved the video such great tips.
Our toddler room currently has a serial biter. This child however will bite unprovoked and in most cases does not show signs of emotional distress. For example it’s time to line up for outdoor play and the child has bitten the individual simply standing behind. Or we during story time the child will bite the individual sitting nearest to them. When approached the child is often smiling, giggling, pointing to things in the distance, unable and or unwilling to focus on my words. Any tips?
I have the exact same situation in my classroom. Did you ever solve yours?
Also looking for a solution to this, as this is what my 2 1/2 year old has been doing at daycare. It’s getting to the point where she could get kicked out and I’m just at a total loss, as we implement all these strategies at home/daycare. I’m feeling terrible for the other children that are affected by this behaviour and can only imagine what their parents think, but we are doing everything we can to make sure this doesn’t continue. Any updates on anyone else’s situation would be much appreciated!
Lord I needed this video
My son is almost 2, and has been bit 4-5 times this yr at daycare, and yesterday he bit someone, and today he bit and threw toys that hit another child. I am pregnant and I've heard that they can sense a shift in hormones and it can ramp up their need for attention, but I am feeling so defeated right now. At almost 2 he doesn't have a lot of words, and I can't do a lot whole he's at daycare. They say all they can do is talk to him about not biting and use words instead, and they are all certified so I'm sure they know what they are doing! I am just at a loss now and am feeling very overwhelmed.
LOL I swear Emma times these videos with my son's development. My son started chomping down on his mum a few weeks ago haha! useful vid as always Ms Hubbard. Thanks for sharing
😂 So glad these videos are coming on time for you and your little one. Hopefully the advice in this video stops the biting! Goodluck!
Mam pls share video for independent walking learning at home and right technique to develop that.
Our son is 14 months old and has started biting a few times. This video helped us tremendously! New parents so thanks Emma.
My pleasure! Hope it helps!
For future reference, or anyone else reading, at just 14 months its likely that they are biting because of teething. Simply offering them something different to bite on, frozen fruit, teething toy, will often fix the problem. That age is generally too young to be "naughty" in that way.
Hi! Thank you for your videos! Do you have any tips for us regarding this behaviour? Our non verbal soon to be 2 yo has been biting us (only us parents) for almost a year and we have used this exact method without improvement. Last month though he’s been biting so hard that it a few times have been impossible to not say ”ouch!”, but then we go right back to the method. He’s been examined but found to not have any diagnosis, he meets all other milestones and is otherwise a sweet, social kid, but who gets really upset when he doesn’t get his way or doesn’t get -all- the attention all the time. He also sometimes bites us out of nowhere when everything seems fine. Been told by the people examining him (who have seen us dealing with this on camera) to just keep doing exactly what we’re doing but I mean…it’s not working and even getting worse.
Oh, ours as well. Went to a pediatrician yesterday and her main response is the reason because of he is unable to say what he wants. She told us to talk more to him and teach him more words, so far every single time I try to teach him “can you say....” his immediate response is “no no no” 🙃
I nursed my 2 sons (back in the Stone Age) till 8 and 9 months old. Each one decided it might be fun to give me a nip and of course I shrieked and they giggled with those little pearly whites! Needless to say, they were immediately weaned. Cutest little giggles I ever heard!
OK. It works with toddlers. Any suggestions for a 6 year old? She doesn't bite at home. We worked through that. She still does it to peers at school some times. Over stupid crap.
I love your videos! 😊
Thank you! 😊
@@EmmaHubbard you're welcome 😊
Yes perfect timing! My toddler bit me today!
I hope this helps! 🙂
You’re never too old for the wiggles
Does this work for 1yr old and what about hair pulling
Thank you once again for information that will help now and later!
I have a question, does this approach apply to 1 year olds? My little one is currently teething and he’ll bite me as a result. I don’t yell or tell him to stop, I just grab a tether for him to chew. I tell him he can bite the toy.
He can’t speak yet. Is there any other methods I should be trying? I don’t find the behavior harmful yet, but I know that it’s something I’ll have to stop eventually
Be firm and say " ouch!", or say " No!".
I have a 13 month is obsessed with hair and does not understand the difference between gentle and grabbing. How do we reinforce gentle hands or no pulling. She typically only does it with us adults but she has gone after other little kids hair too.
Hey Emma, my little one is 13 months old and is she biting herself. What should I do?
My child is only fifteen months and in childcare and has bitten three kids in one week so far.... He was moved to the toddler room from the infant room.Because he's so advanced at moving around and understanding.So all the kids are eighteen months plus. How do you do this with a child?That's so young and actually have them understand. They're writing him up every time he does it
Is this effective for 11 month old or only older children?
What about for babies? Like on who's 17 mo, doesn't have a lot of language tools yet, but has an issue with biting at daycare.
Learn and use this sentence (it worked for me): “[Name of the child], I don’t really think this is an effective way to reach any desired outcome but creates resistance from the party you are biting, and winning their cooperation is definitely the way to go” - children find these kind of grown-up talk extremely boring, and children hate being bored, and hearing sentences that never seem to end is also so unpleasant to them that they will not feel like being in this situation again. By the way, my 8 y.o. daughter bit me 3 times so far today, and for an extensive period of time, but it does not hurt...
These tips are great but for toddlers around 2 years of age. My toddler is 14 months and is biting me and other family members a lot. He is preverbal, so I can't explain him anything. What should I do? I think part of the biting is related to teething because he does it at random and not only when he is upset.
What if the biting is happening with a 11 month old? Is there a different strategy? My little one is obsessed with biting me and I would like it to stop, but talking through emotions with her might be better practice for the future, but it won’t stop the biting now.
My little 9-month-old baby enjoys biting my shoulder with his 2 sharp teeth while I try helping him to fall asleep. It is pretty challenging to continne singing the lullaby instead of screaming. :'D
I would calmly stick that baby in his crib and walk away. I bet he stops quickly. Don't allow the child to abuse you, it doesn't make you a good parent it just makes you raise a bad human.
What about when they are only 18 months and biting their twin? Also, what do you do when they bite themselves?
My twin A is doing this!!! 😅 It’s awful!!! I just run over to Twin B and hold him while I say “No bite” to Twin A. I feel like she will be doing this for a while 😅
I tried everything, but so far, I didn't work on my 4 years old. Any more suggestions to calm his behavior?
❤Thank you Emma, Appreciate it 😆the little ones are always biting me! Love from Mikayla.
Hope this makes it stop!
Hi Emma, Thank you for another informative video. I do have a question though. You said that toddlers don't distinguish between negative and positive attention, they are happy as long as they get attention, but then you state that standing over them to talk to them can be intimidating and overwhelming. I agree with you that it is best to get down to their level, but doesn't that imply that they interpret some kinds of attention as negative? Surely you mean that they don't GENERALLY distinguish between negative and positive attention. Perhaps I'm being nitpicky, but absolute statements can be misleading to some people (like me).
Depends on the kid. Some kids will act out to get any attention and don't care about the quality of the attention. Personally, when someone yelled at me, it was too overwhelming for me to actually take in what they were saying, so I tried to avoid being yelled at at all costs, including suppressing my own needs (like holding my bladder until I wet my pants when I was six because I saw my teacher scold another kid for asking to go to the bathroom).
I’m a very good mother-in-law, I never give advice to my daughter-in-law, ever. She has already voluntarily estranged herself from some family members, and I don’t want that to happen to my husband and I. It is so heartbreaking to watch her hit her 11-month-old son for biting. This is her first child, and everyone in the family is afraid to say anything about how abusive she is to the child. I have to stay home because I can’t stand it.
Can i use these techniques also for my child who hits his head to the door or wall when he gets angry or frustrated? My son's 17 months old and he hits his head suddenly when he's upset or frustrated
This seems soooo helpful and important... my problem is that my little boy is chomping folks now and he's only 11 months so I can't expect him to understand the verbal element of this protocol. So should I just place him away from us if he bites? It's often to get attention (he'll bite my legs if I'm cooking and can't pick him up).
I have this question as well!
Me too
My son started biting at 18 months, when we brought his little brother home. He bites when I’m breastfeeding most of the time. It’s difficult to get up and walk away without interrupting my littlests feeds… any tips for that?
Hi Emma, loving your videos! It's so great to have a fellow Aussie professional mum to learn from!
My 10 month old is biting a lot. Primarilly me and occasionally her dad. Others only if they put their hands near her mouth. Sometimes when she's on the breast, she does it from frustration at a slow flow, but sometimes she just comes up and bites my leg or my big toe (!!) and always fingers if they're close. Sometimes this happens while she's playing by herself and I think she's saying "hey time to pay attention to me now!" sometimes we're in the middle of a game! I redirect her when I can, I tell her "no biting" and pop her on the floor. But there doesn't seem to be any rhyme or reason and the current strategy isn't working.
Do you have any suggestions for this bite-scarred mum?
Hi @Amanda Furnivall the strategy in this video would be helpful, in that you respond calmly and then keep you or others safe. If she is doing it to gain your attention and you keep showing her that when she bites, you put her on the ground or move away slightly she may stop biting. I would also model and label items and toys and how to play with them. She might be biting because she is frustrated as unsure how to play with a toy or biting because she wants your help. Labelling items/objects will also help with language development which may reduce the incidents of biting as she gains words.
My little one has started hitting us in the face ...we do not hit so we're confused why this is happening. But, it is like biting? How should we respond to it? Cause we obviously don't want our kid slapping us, or anyone.
Any tips for younger kids? My 11mo son like to bite arms and shoulders
Good video. my son at 5 years is biting recently, he don't have such behaviour previously .now he is having lots of behaviour issues how can I control him ?? Especially when he is very angry
Hi @Haritha Reddy it's really hard to see your little one biting when it wasn't something they previously did. Do you know why he is becoming upset or why he might be biting (so what is triggering the behaviour)? If you know the trigger then you can teach your little one an alternative response to manage these situations in the future. If you can, try and remain calm in the moment and follow the tips in this video when responding to the biting or other behaviours. At this age they are still developing their skills to identify and manage their emotions, so they often need adults to help them regulate.
If the behaviour is occurring in response to difficulty expressing himself (so a possible language delay), or difficulty managing everyday activities (like getting dressed, brushing teeth, eating, socialising etc) then it would be good to check in with a speech pathologist (if it is due to communication difficulties) or an occupational therapist or a psychologist to get specific advice and strategies.
Hope that helps!
Our 13 month old son has been biting at daycare. He will bite up to 4 or 7 times a day and has to be sent home sometimes 2 or 3 times a week. We are at our wits end because he does not do it at home. Do you have any ideas on how to reduce and eliminate his biting? - Concerned parent from Charlotte, NC (USA)
Hi Kaitlyn the fist thing you need to figure out is why your child is biting. Essentially your son is trying to communicate something. Maybe he was playing with a toy and another kid grabbed it and if he finds it hard to use his words so he bit. There is always a trigger for any behaviour. To find out what the trigger is you need to work with the childcare as the behaviour is only happening there. Once you know what it is then you can work together to reduce the risk of his biting his peers, as well as teach him the skills he needs to manager the interactions differently. Hope that helps.
Going through this now with our 16 month old. Only at daycare and isn’t provoked or frustrated in any way before doing it. Did you all find a solution?
My 13 month old started smacking us in the face. We have been saying a firm no and she repeats no, shakes her head and then repeatedly does it. She’s also started doing it when she doesn’t get her own way and when I’m trying to get her down for her nap. Any tips?
Hi! My 13 month old is doing this too! Do you have any tips?!
Hi Emma, what if it’s one year old baby what can I do? 😭
Is this the same for an 8 month old as a toddler?
Hi, can this be used for hair pulling? My child has started playing with my hair at night but it doesn’t come in a state of aggression it’s usually just playing maybe soothing himself but does pull at them?
Hi Shazay you could use this strategy but if your little one is pulling your hair as a way to soothe himself before sleep I would try and tell him what he can do instead. So if you are happy for him to play with your hair before bed you could say "Pat, pat Mummy's hair" when he accidentally pulls it. So give him a soft toy or doll with long hair that he can pat just before bed. Hope that helps!
My son bites quite a lot. He bites my shoulder when he is excited. Me bites me when he doesn’t want to go to bed and I am singing him songs in my arms, he bites me just because. He bites me when I am trying to hold him back from touching something not safe then he will bite my arm or hand because he is frustrated with me. Sometimes I know it’s because he is teething but if I offer him a teether he gets bored of it and chucks it. Sometimes he comes for kisses and he gives me kisses and other times he bites so I never know what I am going to get. He isn’t an angry child. He is very happy but the biting! He is 13 months old. He isn’t saying words yet but babbling so would he understand this method?
Mo thank you for writing this because I’m at this stage and exactly this my baby does this. He bites either when in my arms he’s teething. He gets bored of his teething toys and moves to sofas clothes, toys anythinggggg but his teething toys. I’m struggling cause he’s also just 1 year old lol not sure he’ll understand as he is already active he’ll laugh it off or smile if I react 😅like Help
Our 14 month old almost bit his cousins nose off so definitely looking for ways to stop it. He's gotten very aggressive recently and I know he doesn't understand so we don't spank. Not until he understands and we can't try talking first.
So this advice will be affective for kicking as well ?
Yep! The concepts will still be the same.
My daughter is 3 and biting thank u I will try this
I hope it helps 😀
My toddler just bit me while playing and being extremely excited. He does this sometimes. How do you handle that?
I’m a great grandma so I do things differently I bite back. Not hard but it tells them this hurts my kids never did again. But if I just speak sweetly all that says is I can do whatever I want and I won’t get in trouble
My daughter is deaf with cochlear implants, so she can hear but her speech is delayed by a year or so. She's 2.5 and mostly nonverbal. I know she's frustrated. When she is, she throws things, bites, hits, gets very aggressive. I've been struggling to communicate with her (we do some ASL but we're both quite limited in our knowledge of it). When she's upset, she tears off her processors which means I can ONLY speak to her in ASL. I need to learn how to say these things in ASL, clearly.
what do you do when its a baby 11 months old?
I'm taking this as remedy for hitting.
My grandson whom is 2 bites a lot. I have 7 grandchildren aging from 3 and a half to 4 weeks old. We all spend most days together. My grandson bites the other kids and adults frequently. BUT he is not doing it aggressively even though the bite is bad. He is happily playing or running around and just bites one of us seemingly for no reason. He has been put away from the kids, told not to bite and that it hurts. His mum has bought him a necklace with a bite toy on it.. Oh and he will even bite himself hard. He has now started pinching and spitting into his hands and rubbing it over his face and continues to bite...When he is removed from the other children, he doesn't seem to care.. there is no change in his emotions at all. Sometimes he will kiss the person he has bitten, with out being asked too, but will still do it again. We are all at a loss in what to do and whether there is more going on than just "normal" toddler behaviour. He is also an extremely active child who rarely sits still. He sleeps at night but rarely in the day now. PLEASE HELP
My baby Fiona is biting everyone at daycare. It’s ‘bite incident report’ one after another. It only happens at daycare, so I’m not sure what to do about this. They call her crocodile 🐊 Thanks a lot for the advice
Going through the same thing right now. Did anything work?
my son started biting around 6 yrs not when small he is autistic, limited words .he doesdn't bite things only others not even himself . he is 15 yrs he is now going to new school i am scared looking at his old records they were asking about his biting. Can this technique work on my son becoz his is not repetitive but when all of a sudden he get anger he does it not otherwise
What if it still doesn't help ... my little one keeps it coming amd he laughs... even hinting no matter what or how i keep calm je keeps doing it