I HATED My Wedding.

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  • Опубликовано: 30 сен 2024
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Комментарии • 350

  • @jean6061
    @jean6061 2 года назад +105

    I enjoyed my wedding planning and our special day. I remember standing at the altar about halfway through the ceremony and thinking, "Our ceremony is almost over and I spent longer selecting the flowers than the wedding ceremony itself!" That might put a little perspective in wedding planning for some. The wedding is one day; your marriage lasts a lifetime.

  • @keyessence
    @keyessence 3 года назад +223

    My mom hated her wedding. MIL took over everything, and neither of them knew how to stand up to her. She didn’t get to choose anything, didn’t know anyone invited other than her immediate family, and they had to beg to have a first dance and cake. She threw away her dress, the photos, and the wedding video too! So in case anyone needs to hear this, PUT YOUR FOOT DOWN WITH YOUR MIL! My parents plan on having another, more personal wedding in a few years

    • @junewataha5999
      @junewataha5999 2 года назад +8

      lol my bf didn't want me to meet his mom. I met her unfortunately, and him not wanting me to meet her was for good reason 😬. He didn't want me meeting her, yet alone ever letting her know when we're getting married.
      We don't want a wedding or anything, and I'd just rather have a small get together with my family (like an outdoor bbq type of thing with my siblings and parents), but I don't want that woman ever meeting my family, yet alone being part of something intimate/personal because she's not invited!
      Some people will probably tell me to just have patience with her/not be rude or anything (even my parents lol. I'm not rude to her, but if they met her, they'd realize immediately how she behaves), but she's not invited no matter what! 🙄

    • @jadedixon3641
      @jadedixon3641 2 года назад +4

      My stepmother would be like this. That is why we're eloping at a courthouse and not telling anyone.

    • @Selahree
      @Selahree Год назад +2

      @@junewataha5999 I'm not meeting my fiances mother or grandmother and totally believe him. I'm fine. We dont need them. 🙂

  • @ZainabHabib
    @ZainabHabib 3 года назад +108

    "Comparison is the thief of joy." Life lesson for literally everything.

  • @gen65743
    @gen65743 3 года назад +47

    Brides need to keep in mind that the wedding is about you and the groom and your families coming together. It should be a day about love, not about having all your DIY and decor and other items looking pretty like Pinterest or Instagram

  • @Animeshelly0120
    @Animeshelly0120 3 года назад +240

    the video hasn’t started yet but this is about the diy linens, isn’t it? 😂😂

  • @f.-j.j.5738
    @f.-j.j.5738 3 года назад +111

    I can't believe I'm watching you now as an engaged woman. I have the kind of wedding planner who plans everything and takes all the stress away, I only have to choose between things she already narrowed down, so I'm enjoying this a lot, even in the middle of a pandemic. God has blessed our preparation and we're heading to the alter with lots of peace and happiness.

  • @VaneSpranger
    @VaneSpranger 2 года назад +15

    😢 I feel so sad. I got married 2 weeks ago and I can't stop feeling sad about it. I was so stressed, everything felt so chaotic. A cousin was in charge of the decoration, but nobody helped her that day, when I got there nothing was set, the candy bar and cheese tables were empty, the DJ was horrible, I was so worried about everything that I didn't even noticed anything around me, I didn't see my guests dresses, I coudn't sit for a minute to talk to my friends, right after our first dance we had to go and pay for the catering so we didn't dance the first song with our guests. Absolutely horrible. My husband doesn't understand why I'm so sad and I guess it's because I was son invested in the details and I wanted everything to be perfect.
    If I could go back I would definitely hire a day coordinator and would have tried to hire my own DJ instead of letting the restaurant deciding that for us. The worst part was to read every bride on a forum saying how perfect their day was, I was feeling so lonely about this. It's good to know I'm not alone in this.
    Thanks for this video.

    • @saranrobinson1275
      @saranrobinson1275 2 года назад +6

      You’re totally not alone. I got married a month ago and have a bit of sadness when I think about it. I think about all the little details and the things that went wrong. Like yourself I feel so alone when I see everyone posting or talking about their wedding being the best day ever, I now try to avoid any wedding content or anything that will trigger me. Just try to focus on the positives … we’ll get through it… eventually:)

    • @VaneSpranger
      @VaneSpranger 2 года назад +3

      @@saranrobinson1275 yes! I’m hoping my feelings change when I get to see the professional photos 🙏🏻. But I think I’ll do the same and avoid the wedding content too, it definitely doesn’t help!

    • @chrisk4053
      @chrisk4053 Месяц назад +1

      @@saranrobinson1275try and focus on what you did enjoy. It sounds like a day coordinator is really necessary. Thank you for sharing your experience- it’s hard to plan and wait for such a big event and have so many regrets. Just remember that it’s just one of life’s big events- not THE only big life event. Sending hugs

  • @shelbyparsons9346
    @shelbyparsons9346 3 года назад +55

    Because of you and your videos, I loved my wedding day! I never missed a video. It was almost like having you here with me to help plan it, so thank you!! I would say that I planned 99.9% of it all based on what I learned from you and your videos. Since you weren't physically with me to help plan it though, I was able to find a venue and photographer that worked together in coordinating the day for me. I was able to relax and enjoy all of my hard work. The best advice that I took from you though was pausing and taking it all in throughout the day. My husband and I did this multiple times throughout the day! One moment in particular was close to the end of the night. Our DJ started playing the last slow song, so we snuck off to just have one last moment where the ceremony took place that day. It was just us and the twinkle lights. We could still hear the music playing at the reception and we just held each other and stood where we said our vows. It was one of those rare moments in life where time stood still and I will forever be grateful for that memory with my husband. I really feel like I have you to thank for that moment, so thank you! From the bottom of my heart I will forever be grateful for you and your videos!

  • @cjacobson2431
    @cjacobson2431 3 года назад +46

    I got engaged in July and married in September. I knew that if we were to wait and have a huge wedding (covid). That I would end up disappointed and overwhelmed with everything. We had a small backyard wedding at a rental house on Nantucket and we put everything together ourselves. I remember only my parents and sister and I putting flowers on the arch together and it’s one of my favorite memories. It was just us and 14 other people. It was the best

  • @GhostBuni
    @GhostBuni 3 года назад +90

    I really hope you make a video about your bad experience with that vendor! You don't have to use their company name, but maybe give us some more detail so we know red flags to look for with vendors!

  • @caitlinclaflinmongillo6021
    @caitlinclaflinmongillo6021 3 года назад +61

    “Don’t always let the price tag be the reason that you book a vendor” - YES! I learned this with my initial photographer. Nothing terrible, just not very invested and not the level of skill I was hoping for. Thankfully we figured it out early and we could afford to find someone new.

    • @SophieSimmonsMusic
      @SophieSimmonsMusic 3 года назад +3

      I had exactly this situation! Every time she posted on Instagram, I would be filled with dread that I might not be happy with our wedding photos. I felt absolutely awful letting her go and booking someone else, but now we have someone booked whose work we adore and I’m so excited to see how she captures our day ✨

    • @caitlinclaflinmongillo6021
      @caitlinclaflinmongillo6021 3 года назад

      @@SophieSimmonsMusic thank goodness for Instagram! Otherwise I might not have noticed until it was too late.

  • @MakeAWish91
    @MakeAWish91 3 года назад +90

    *Letting the ads play bc I want Jamie to have nice things*

    • @selandiatoote7489
      @selandiatoote7489 3 года назад +2

      Same! lol. I literally just muted it and scrolled down when I saw this XD

    • @aileendelgado571
      @aileendelgado571 2 года назад

      Lmao. Same. Thak you, Jamie ❤

  • @gabbyfringette7250
    @gabbyfringette7250 3 года назад +53

    *flashbacks to the linen*

  • @misspenneylane
    @misspenneylane Год назад +10

    I find it really refreshing to hear someone say "I didn't enjoy a lot of my wedding day" - so many people to me have been saying I just need to roll with the punches and on the day I'll just be so happy and I won't care if things go wrong etc etc... I don't find this comforting. My wedding is next week and I regret hiring an important vendor and I've had some very stressful and negative things happen recently surrounding the wedding. I also have a health condition and have been sick the whole time I've been engaged, and I'm worried that I'll be in a lot of pain on my wedding day. All this to say... there's actually a lot of pressure to "soak up your wedding day" and "don't stress and just enjoy it" etc etc... sometimes bad shit happens, and dismissing and ignoring it isn't going to help. I hope that I have a really fun day next week, but I hate that there is so much pressure on me for next week. I wish weddings were easier - no "you have to have...", no "so and so will be so upset if you don't...", no pressure to look perfect and to have your hair, nails, tan, skincare, etc etc perfect, no "you have to wear white"... ALL OF IT! Everyone makes it out to be such a perfect day where you are this perfect looking, perfectly calm superwoman... and I'm like... I HAVE BEEN IN CHRONIC PAIN FOR 2 YEARS, MOST DAYS I JUST WANT TO NAP! :'D

  • @erinhowett3630
    @erinhowett3630 3 года назад +71

    Got engaged 3 days ago! Been a long time watcher, and now they apply to me!

  • @Travelbyailsa
    @Travelbyailsa 3 года назад +44

    Would you ever consider renewing your vows to have a redo for it?

  • @mf3610
    @mf3610 3 года назад +16

    I just said vows in my kitchen and we took photos at home and around our town and then just had family come over for a toast and we all went out to dinner. IT WAS PERFECT haha zero complications

  • @kay7130
    @kay7130 3 года назад +24

    PLEASE do a video on food. That’s basically the last thing I need to book but I cannot find anyone in my price range so now we are considering doing it ourselves. Can you make a video or alternatives to cut cost? Sides that are easier to prep beforehand?

    • @paulinebeal5808
      @paulinebeal5808 3 года назад +1

      I had trouble with this too. I took a little longer to find a caterer that would work within my budget. If my husband and I couldn't find a sit-down caterer then we would have gotten a food truck or orders a big order from a restaurant we liked and had our other planning staff on-site to help set up the food. I thought about hiring my own servers and dishwashers for our event instead of going with a company.
      I'm glad I found my caterer though. You can always ask what they can do within your budget. Some vendors thought that $40 per is too low. My caterer said that if it was buffet they just had to bring the food from their commnerical kitchen to the venue and have fewer staff in order to make it both profitable for them and make it beneficial for us.
      She does have a video on buffet vs sit down dinner options you should watch it. It helped me out a lot to determine how much I can expect to spend on food.

    • @ashleighray7503
      @ashleighray7503 3 года назад +1

      Check bbq places in your area they are the cheapest caterer where I live

  • @selandiatoote7489
    @selandiatoote7489 3 года назад +14

    "comparison is the thief of joy" - Jamie Wolfer 2021
    Wow. Super profound in too many ways.... O.O

  • @milenabindel3897
    @milenabindel3897 3 года назад +27

    You are literally my zen go to when I start getting anxious about my upcoming wedding.

  • @Mamaslittleblog
    @Mamaslittleblog 3 года назад +39

    I’m in a cricut wedding group and majority of the group need to watch this. Unfortunately I see brides stressing over the most minor details and trying to DIY way too much.

    • @Indifferent12390
      @Indifferent12390 2 года назад +1

      Me, DIYing a wedding in two months and stressing the entire time

  • @MidnightThinker624
    @MidnightThinker624 3 года назад +25

    I so desperately appreciate this video. Sometimes you just need someone else to say what you were thinking to really put your feels to rest

    • @nadiadansani2139
      @nadiadansani2139 3 года назад

      I appreciate all of her videos!!!! ❤️❤️❤️👑

  • @erinwhipple4666
    @erinwhipple4666 3 года назад +30

    Can you do a video about destination weddings and elopements? We’re planning on saying our vows in Paris with just the immediate family and would love to hear your advice!

    • @slytherinprincess5682
      @slytherinprincess5682 3 года назад +1

      She has a video on elopements from about nine months ago! Just search for “Jamie Wolfer elopement” and it should be one of the first results!

    • @erinwhipple4666
      @erinwhipple4666 3 года назад +3

      @@slytherinprincess5682 I’m looking for more along the lines of getting married abroad, but thanks for the suggestion!

    • @ericairizarry6563
      @ericairizarry6563 3 года назад

      @@slytherinprincess5682 I was JUST about to say that. Lol nice work.

    • @foxxybrown291
      @foxxybrown291 3 года назад

      Yes I need to know what’s feasible to diy and take on a plane to the Bahamas lol. Decorations etc. xx

  • @tiaraanice
    @tiaraanice 3 года назад +49

    This just confirmed my desire to have an intimate ceremony and dinner with close family 😔

    • @sharishari2508
      @sharishari2508 3 года назад

      This is my exact thought while watching this video

    • @madisoned
      @madisoned 3 года назад +1

      That's what we had to do due to COVID and an intimate ceremony was so much better. We felt a lot more relaxed saved buckloads of money!

    • @zsam8095
      @zsam8095 3 года назад +2

      We are planning a 2022 (covid may still be a thing) as long as our immediate family is there thats all that matters.

    • @Ev-xv2lq
      @Ev-xv2lq 3 года назад

      I agree! We are having an intimate wedding with family only . I am enjoying the process since I am planning everything on a budget !

    • @nadiadansani2139
      @nadiadansani2139 3 года назад

      A Beyoncé and Jay-Z style wedding!

  • @veronicagrimes7734
    @veronicagrimes7734 3 года назад +11

    I totally feel you. I 100% regret the florist I picked. My husband tried to warn me that he wasn't a fan, but I was so concerned about cost even though flowers were really important to me.

  • @catabreanrussell9251
    @catabreanrussell9251 3 года назад +48

    I also hated my wedding just because of a single vendor. I got married in November and I’m still shedding tears about it.

    • @hillary96renteria82
      @hillary96renteria82 3 года назад +4

      oh no, that is so sad 😭I hope I can have better experience when I get married in 2023

    • @theresawest
      @theresawest 3 года назад +6

      I think the party goers don't usually know what has gone wrong luckily. My day of coordinator was so bad! Try not to be hard on yourself. I'm sure your guests had a great time!

  • @BasicallyLauralol
    @BasicallyLauralol 3 года назад +10

    My soon to be mother in law wants to take over the coordination and I’m so happy for it. She’s always on top of everything. And when things go wrong she’s good about letting go and moving on. I can’t wait for the big day.

  • @ericairizarry6563
    @ericairizarry6563 3 года назад +9

    Dude. This video just totally made me go running to look at your wedding photos again.
    Love you and I want you to know that everything that you went though on your wedding day only helped you in your profession. All the things you talk about here, I can look back at my wedding and realize that because of you, I didn’t have any of those feelings, even though things we going crazy at my wedding, I NEVER felt any of it BECAUSE OF YOU. Thank you so much for sheltering me on my day, from the crazy family, missing items, traffic that made everyone late, or the missing photos page that made photos go Waaaaaayyyyy to long.
    I would never wish your experience on anyone but you learned from it and made it your mission to SAVE so many other brides.
    All I have to say is THANK YOU. I will always be grateful that I found your videos and lucked out in hiring you to save my day.
    Thank you, thank you, thank you. Forever you stalker, I’m mean admirer. - Erica GRIFFIN!!! #allgriffedup

  • @erinadastra
    @erinadastra 3 года назад +9

    Omg as bad as it is, it feels nice to know I'm not alone. I've had so much guilt about how upset I felt and still feel about my May 2019 wedding.
    I had 45 person wedding but the reality is it was still a wedding with a lot of moving parts. It definitely wasn't as bad is it could have been because I took so many of your great tips. I planned everything myself and despite all the detailed list, labels, and floorplans I made, I showed up to my reception and the caterer and venue had setup incorrectly making it impossible for my friends to decorate as planned. Most of my decorations got scrapped, including my photo backdrop, and our table got pushed into a corner. Also I compromised too much trying to fit everything into my tight budget. And I was getting asked set up and schedule questions the whole wedding. I had a friend do photography and I have no photos of us and our families. So many guest told me it was their favorite wedding but I was the person that saw everything that went wrong. I was way too invested, it was so overwhelming I felt like I couldn't wait until it was over. The food was good, my friends did their best, and my husband was wonderful but looking back I wish I would have just had a courthouse wedding.

    • @ScenariosOfDrea
      @ScenariosOfDrea Год назад +1

      I'm glad I'm not alone, I did the courthouse, and wanted to have a wedding a shmedium sized wedding as my husband and I joke, ad we realized it got bigger and bigger we DIY'ed it at the recreational hall near my country house. but I put so much effort and in the end the photographer was the worst and he came from a company. The food was amazing everyone tells me it was a fun wedding, and I never know what that means cause it's like all weddings are fun I haven't been to one yet I can say I hated lol. However like I know every thing went wrong from the photographer not wrangling people together to the mics not working to the music skipping to NO music when I went outside down the isle I wish we decided after we did the legal nuptiauals to just have had decided to save a year and do the wedding at least maybe waited till the New Year of some sort possibly I keep thinking that maybe I shouldn't have pushed since we did the courthouse September I could have waited till Febuary. Maybe we could have found a very nice venue that would have planned out everything. I selfishly think I'd want to do it all again but I feel silly and guilty for even thinking that just cause the mics and such didn't work

  • @amykjaimes
    @amykjaimes 3 года назад +6

    Can you do a video of a mock wedding? Like Draw a picture with your words and take us on a trip through the itinerary for the day. I think that would be cool to see :) Btw, luhh you! 💕❤️

  • @brittanycrawford3168
    @brittanycrawford3168 3 года назад +5

    Fantastic advice! The pinterest comparison is soo true. I bought my dress. Love it. But my photographer posted a photo of a wedding she did last summer...and I loved everything I saw in the photo (the brides dress and decor were even similar to mine). I took a screenshot of this womans wedding and kept it on my phone. I would compare this photo to the item I already had ... and i started to regret the items i had (yes, even my dress! A dress i love).
    I noticed that this was happening and removed the screenshot from my phone and instantly my mood about my own wedding started improving.
    So, yes, dont compare.

  • @layla5312
    @layla5312 2 года назад +2

    Honestly i didnt like most of my vendors but i had no choice we had very little money we didnt get any help to pay for our wedding

  • @nadiadansani2139
    @nadiadansani2139 3 года назад +5

    The sound of their voice doesn’t annoy you spill sis☕️☕️☕️☕️

  • @veronica.gv.
    @veronica.gv. 3 года назад +6

    We put too much pressure on picture perfect, pinterest weddings..
    Had a mini wedding in our backyard, I DIYed almost everything to even the decor & linens. I decorated the night before.
    I wanted to do everything myself, incase I didn't like how other people such as vendors would do them.
    We had a Hallowedding and nobody around me catered to us non traditional Halloween brides. Or I didn't find any🤷‍♀️
    We are having our big reception in a venue once the pandemic ends,now we have everything ready.

    • @LOUBAT1
      @LOUBAT1 3 года назад

      Lovely! Good for you!

  • @saraghvirtue1345
    @saraghvirtue1345 3 года назад +5

    Thank you so much for this! I had my wedding in September 2020 and although there’s a lot I loved about it, there was a lot I hated and have had guilt/resentment over. I still have a hard time watching/looking at wedding related things on social media...thought I was crazy 😂

  • @jennastoutland
    @jennastoutland 3 года назад +6

    I get married on Saturday and I have been feeling the stress HARD the past few months. I guess that’s partially from planning and then replanning a wedding in 2020... I find it hard to give things up to people right now and have been so worked up over the details (we can’t afford a planner). Thank you, Jaimie. I needed this.

  • @msshey9
    @msshey9 3 года назад +5

    Do you think you will have a vow renewal? That would be a perfect opportunity to redo your wedding.

  • @winterglow000
    @winterglow000 3 года назад +6

    I totally started my Day of Coordinator business because of my wedding! That’s so funny 😆

  • @llamasugar5478
    @llamasugar5478 3 года назад +8

    I hated my dress. It was the best I could do, but it was not “me.”
    If I had it to do again, I would’ve just bought a pretty formal dress that I liked and might wear again.

    • @franziskasummers2765
      @franziskasummers2765 3 года назад +1

      So true I had mine custom made but didn’t know anything about the process and what to look out for and my vision completely didn’t get through to my dress maker. So in the end I had something nice but not perfectly fitting that wasn’t what I wanted. It ruined a lot for me so I try to think of all the stuff that was perfect on the day 😌😊

    • @llamasugar5478
      @llamasugar5478 3 года назад

      Franziska Summers Right! There were so many lovely things about our day, and in the end I was married to my favorite human. 🥰 30 years and counting . . .

  • @abbyhenderson9574
    @abbyhenderson9574 3 года назад +7

    Aw Jamie, I love where your heart is in all this. I've been watching your channel for 2 years (not even engaged yet) and I am so grateful that you're stepping in as a resource for me and other future brides!

  • @karlisprague2331
    @karlisprague2331 3 года назад +7

    I started watching you SO long ago and now I've been engaged for a year & am about 5 months away from our wedding. Thank you for all the help & tips throughout this process!!!!

  • @kristinmichels1963
    @kristinmichels1963 3 месяца назад +1

    People have weird reactions when you say you didn't like your wedding. I loved planning my first one, the DIYs went great, everything was beautiful. I just HATED being the center of attention all day. My favorite part was waiting for the ceremony with my wedding party in a small room together. When the reception started i was so over it that my cousin and i disappeared to go to drink wine and my family had to drag me back into the reception. I didn't want to be the entertainer anymore, my introvert energy was spent before we even started.
    Thankfully i get a do-over (new and improved fiancee, too 😅). This one is much smaller and more low key, and I'm planning activities in a way that will hopefully keep guests occupied without me entertaining. Here's to hoping your videos help make this one the event i was hoping for! 🥰

  • @ashlynn1362
    @ashlynn1362 7 месяцев назад +1

    My wedding happened and im thankful for it. My husband and I accomplished what we set out to do. However, lots of missing aspects because low/lack of support. Thankful for those who DID though much love to them. I didnt start getting ready until 1230p for a 330pm start wedding because I still had to pick up my cake and chair covers. Chair covers never got put on, backdrop was missing, n/a drinks were missing. Left my beautiful all white bouquet rushing to get in the limo. Absolutely no time for makeup outside of eye liner. Whew....i could go on and on. But again, we got the family together, we're married, and we'll for sure have a big anniversary party/vow renewal with a bigger budget. Much love and good luck brides❤❤❤❤

  • @yesis4926
    @yesis4926 3 года назад +5

    I have you to thank for my decision to hire a wedding coordinator! My coordinator was freakin awesome and she made my experience so much better on my wedding day.

  • @MissJenniferLuv74
    @MissJenniferLuv74 3 года назад +4

    First, I'm so sorry about your wedding. I've been married almost 25 yrs now, and I actually planned my wedding of over 400 people by myself and coordinated everything the day of, but my family jumped in without being asked. Like you, I wasn't thinking about who would make ALL the announcements and the timeline. My aunt jumped in at the beginning to man the doors and direct everyone when to walk in and how to walk into the church. My dad made all the announcements and it was his band that was playing. It honestly worked out beautifully but it was a lesson learned for me too, lol.
    Forward to today, I've been planning my daughter's wedding (6/26/21). This time I hired a coordinator for the day of, bartender, caterer, table, and chairs rental package, restroom-trailer, venue, and rented the estate that is on the property. My sister happily arranged all the cake tastings and paid for the cake amongst other things. The only thing I will diy this time is the table decor. I purchased the gauze for all the tables, silverware, vases, candles, napkins, and other decor because it was so much cheaper than renting it. I have pictures of what the tables should look like, and the coordinator and a couple friends will do the actual decorating. I want to relax and not be asked one question on the day of my daughter's wedding.
    Cheers to you for sharing your experience.

  • @silverbuckranch9779
    @silverbuckranch9779 4 месяца назад +1

    I honestly already hate my wedding. Zero support from both families. Its very lonely.

  • @katelynbrown6956
    @katelynbrown6956 3 года назад +4

    I think it's super important to be talking about being disappointed with your own wedding. I'm sorry you had that experience but I know so many women do and I think we often feel like we can't talk about it because we should just be over-the-moon because we had a wedding. Thank you for sharing and using your story to try and help spare others the same experience! Oh and btw I've been watching you since I got engaged (almost 2 years ago now) and your content helped me SO MUCH. You are the reason I hired a wedding planner and the reason I got really clear on my vision and stepped away from Pinterest and the reason I was realistic with myself about the amount of DIY projects I took on. I had some minor disappointments on my wedding day but all-in-all it was wonderful and you played a huge part in that!

  • @arrivaderchisin101
    @arrivaderchisin101 3 года назад +6

    Hi Jaime! Not sure if you’ll see this but my husband and I got married in July and I have struggled with most of what you said about our wedding and more. I think what bothers me most about everything is that our wedding was supposed to be one of the best day of our lives and it wasn’t. I look back on our wedding with disdain and sadness. Much of it was due to lack of funds, which makes me so hard on myself for not waiting another year to save up for more money. On top of everything else we got married during COVID. Anyways I just need advice. I’m still struggling 7 months later. Ive contemplated maybe for our 3 year anniversary doing a vow renewal and actually saving up funds to have the wedding we always wanted, but is that selfish of me? I hope all of this is making sense. I’m glad you made this video because I have been struggling so much with this. Thank you again for all that you do so that hopefully future brides do not make the same mistake💛

    • @CMK2712
      @CMK2712 2 года назад +1

      I hope you’re dreaming a new dream for the perfect and special day that you so deserve!! One thing covid has taught us… we can do things our own way!! Have that second wedding and make it exactly how you want!!!

    • @saranrobinson1275
      @saranrobinson1275 2 года назад +1

      Totally understand how you feel. I had my wedding a month ago and every thing didn’t go as planned; mostly because we spent a lot on the wedding and I really didn’t want to spend anymore. But I also have a bit of sadness thinking about my wedding day; it also started very late which ruined some of the photos we wanted to get. I’m now planning on dressing up all over again and going back to the venue for our one year anniversary to get some of the photos we wanted. We did a destination wedding; hence the decision to go back a year later as opposed to going asap. Just try to focus on the positive and don’t get hung up on it “being the best day ever “ this is what I keep telling myself ❤️

    • @arrivaderchisin101
      @arrivaderchisin101 2 года назад

      @@saranrobinson1275 I'm so sorry to hear you had a similar experience. I am hoping that going back will provide a wonderful experience with your partner, that will be better than you had hoped for.

  • @dollymadeson2151
    @dollymadeson2151 2 года назад +2

    I told my husband before the wedding..." Just want to let you know ..the actual wedding isn't 'fun' for the bride and groom". It's basically " acting " the part and is mostly fun for the guests. I told him "the honeymoon is for the husband and wife to have fun." After I told him this....it ended up being great but I was lucky enough to have it at a Marriott where their caterer did everything except flowers for me. I wish they would do away with backdrops. They are so stupid and a waste of time...IMO...I mean...are we in high school?? I am helping my sister make hers and we are already stressing about who will help us put it up etc etc....So not worth it!!

  • @masmas66
    @masmas66 3 года назад +16

    Been watching you for years, and after such a long engagement, I have to say I stopped looking at Pinterest when I started watching your channel! You gave me confidence to DIY and still stay true to my vision. You also convinced me to hire a wedding planner so thank you thank you a million!

  • @kayseacamp
    @kayseacamp 3 года назад +4

    This video is exactly why I am so thankful I have actually totally tabled my normal A-type personality when it comes to me wedding. I created a very specific well organized Pinterest board and then handed everything off to my all-inclusive venue. If I would have went into planning as my normal every day self I'd hate every minute of it.

  • @Rose-qk2qo
    @Rose-qk2qo 3 года назад +4

    I had a COVID wedding.... lol soooo.... But when things settle down, we want to finally celebrate our wedding with our friends and family... I know I shouldn’t but i get extremely envious of seeing weddings in movies or shows where the bride got to have her perfect wedding. It was still a beautiful wedding and I’m married to my best friend but i hated that one month of the wedding where i went from hoping I’d have my dream wedding, to scratching ALL my plans and completely starting over on them...

    • @iwasalllikeomg
      @iwasalllikeomg 3 года назад +1

      Same! It does put things into perspective though, we were just so happy that we were able to celebrate with our immediate family. But whenever I see images of bigger weddings or even regular events, I get this sting of jealousy. We still have a date at our original venue planned, but with things as they are now, I still don't really see that happening the way I imagined it.

    • @Rose-qk2qo
      @Rose-qk2qo 3 года назад +1

      I’m so sorry! It’s really good to not feel alone but I totally understand that discouragement. We were going to get married at a friends house in their beautiful backyard but i found out that after our wedding date they’d most likely move... and if we celebrate in maybe later next year idk where they’d be. But i hope everything works out for you guys and its your dream wedding and y’all don’t have to worry about anything on that day!(:

  • @AshlieIacocca
    @AshlieIacocca 3 года назад +3

    Do you have a video of your DIY’s? With photos of what you made so we can gauge how much is too much?

  • @antheawhitfield7104
    @antheawhitfield7104 3 года назад +2

    Soooo thankful my mc/dj is also a event planner! He's been doing it for 37 years and he has legit become the most most most valuable person to us! All our vendors know to call him. So many people are judging what we are paying just for him but trust me he is sooo worth every cent!

  • @empatt96
    @empatt96 3 года назад +2

    The video I didn't know I needed. Wish you didn't have a sucky wedding day, but this is so helpful when I'm feeling overwhelmed about all the little things. Helps keep it all in perspective!

  • @margaretmckee7461
    @margaretmckee7461 3 года назад +1

    I want to elope because my family is too toxic on my moms side and I know that they would be super disrespectful and rude and nosy. Also my mom is super catholic so no matter what i do she will be offended if I don’t get married in a church. My parents are also divorced so I don’t even want to think about how stressed I would be about them being mature and not fighting. Also I know I will cry but I have trust issues so I want no one seeing that except my future husband. I still want to celebrate with everyone but I don’t think I can and I don’t want my toxic family members to ruin it and think it’s all about them. My mom also wants me to have a huge wedding so my husband can prove his love to me or whatever which is ridiculous because I’m not marrying him for his money. She also thinks my wedding should be about thanking everyone for getting me to the point of being able to get married more than actually celebrating the love between us. And I am thankful to my loved ones but that is not what a wedding is about. And of course she wants to come on my elopement with me. Which I love her and everything since she’s my mom but I think she’s making it more about her

  • @TrickiVicBB71
    @TrickiVicBB71 3 года назад +2

    As I watching this. Our wedding is next year in May.
    But everytime someone or I think about how I proposed to my fiance. I hated it, fumbled it but she said yes. Utterly surprised by she said yes.

  • @mclaffam
    @mclaffam 3 года назад +3

    The only downfall to my wedding was a budget photographer. My event was all D.I.Y. and under $3,000.00 for the whole event.

  • @shir35303
    @shir35303 3 года назад +2

    Thank you for being this honest, Jamie! I actually hated weddings before we got engaged and we talked a lot about not having one, at all, ever. Now don't get me wrong, I think they're beautiful, but I also think ppl put too much emphasis on the looks of it and the dream they had in mind, sometimes actually more than on the relationship itself.
    So years before, we talked about what is "married" level looks like to us and we decided to "upgrade" our relationship to that, without any event or anything. Fast forward and we re-thought it and said - "but what if we can make it about the things that are actually important in our eyes? wouldn't it be nice to have this memory and photos to look back on?" and so, we decided to give this concept a chance.
    Out of a lot of content out there, I think your channel is really great because you do help your watchers get more grounded and realistic. Thank you so much for that!
    For us, we plan on doing a small event and we set our priorities like this - have this day as calm as it can, so that we can soak it in. Have only our dearest and closest people there. We want to create a ceremony that is about us and dance the night away with our loved ones. The rest - sure, it'd be beautiful to have it in a huge garden, with chef meals, but it's not what this is about for us. so...probably not gonna happen😅
    Wanted to share my perspective here just in case someone else has gone through a similar though spiral...❤️

  • @lovelyrainflowerfarm
    @lovelyrainflowerfarm 3 года назад +3

    Thank you for being so honest about this. I know you’ve talked about some of these things before but for the most part it felt like something you could laugh about. But now understanding how much it affected you, makes a difference.

  • @mirsey93
    @mirsey93 3 года назад +1

    Can I just say you need to think of the aspect of EVERY cost to your wedding plans. Your TIME is also worth much more than the money you spend on your wedding. Especially if you aren't a DIY person. Do not commit to projects that are way over your head. You may be wasting money and precious time if it never gets done or doesn't turn out. I'm 4 months away from my wedding and I'm only DIYing our centre pieces and the seating chart because I knew I couldn't handle more.

  • @TheCleverlibrarian
    @TheCleverlibrarian 3 года назад +14

    I’m so excited I found a wedding coordinator in my area that I not only can afford but she reminds me of your personality !

    • @carolinelowery4671
      @carolinelowery4671 3 года назад

      how expensive is she?

    • @TheCleverlibrarian
      @TheCleverlibrarian 3 года назад +3

      I reached out through the site. I don’t believe it fair to Ms. Wolfer to share the information I received.

    • @carolinelowery4671
      @carolinelowery4671 3 года назад

      @@TheCleverlibrarian totally get that! thanks!

    • @TheCleverlibrarian
      @TheCleverlibrarian 3 года назад

      @@carolinelowery4671 your welcome! Would def reach out through her website though!

  • @queenmin5902
    @queenmin5902 2 года назад +1

    Love Jamie! Idk why I’m watching her videos since I’m doing a courthouse wedding and then spending the money on the honeymoon. I am too controlling and don’t have enough $$$ to bring my full wedding vision to life. Maybe in my next life.

  • @danicandy4ever
    @danicandy4ever 2 года назад +1

    My best advice, dont let too many people play in the wedding sand box. Meaning, not everyone's opinion's matter. Accept that not everyone will be happy about everything. As long as you do your best, meet peoples physical needs then your good! And also provide entertainment (:

  • @lululouton2385
    @lululouton2385 3 года назад +2

    Literally regret my photographer so much and definitely booked based on price 😫

  • @cc_animals
    @cc_animals 3 года назад +3

    I'm with you I was planning my whole entire wedding and I got so stressed out And everything was already paid for. I just went to the courthouse and now we're going to have us a redo wedding at a barn but then it won't be no stress now cuz all we got to do is just take pictures and eat.

    • @alexa6260
      @alexa6260 Год назад

      I wanna do this but don’t wanna disappoint my fiancé

  • @joleedavis9933
    @joleedavis9933 3 года назад +3

    I love my wife. Despised our wedding

  • @kimberlygula5350
    @kimberlygula5350 3 года назад +1

    I was in the same boat this past October😢 A WEEK before our wedding the venue owner said she could no longer be our day of coordinator and that I would either have to appoint a family member or hire someone. Mind you I planned the entire wedding on my own because my family wanted nothing to do with it. I don’t think I’ve ever been so stressed out/EXHAUSTED in my life than on my wedding day because I ran the ship. I only slept one hour the night before our wedding day because I was planning everything out in my head for the day of. I watched your channel for months preparing for our wedding and I knew last minute hiring a coordinator would be pricey but I let other people’s opinion on hiring a coordinator get the best of me and I took on more than I could handle. PLEASEEEE don’t let another girl go through the same struggle we went through on our wedding days! I made the wrong call and should’ve spent the extra money for my own sanity when everyone else told me not to.

  • @amandabrown5462
    @amandabrown5462 3 года назад +1

    Plllllllleeease do a wedding re do or a vow renewal oh because you deserve it so much for who you have been to so many couples. I am so thankful for your tips and tricks and advice.

  • @thebebos23
    @thebebos23 3 года назад +1

    Hi Jamie, I like your videos and your tips are always useful, however I think they will be better if you add more visuals (for instance photos of your wedding, etc). That will keep your viewers more engage with the video

  • @cierraneff8829
    @cierraneff8829 3 года назад +1

    Hi! 🙋🏼‍♀️
    2020 bride here. Old date was 10/3/2020 new date is 10/2/2021. I used to feel the need to DIY everything, but now that It’s pushed - I feel kinda ehh about all of it. Glad you said something about over DIY-ing it. At this point I’ll just be happy if it happens this year. Southern California is still pretty locked down.

  • @elliefrew3429
    @elliefrew3429 3 года назад +1

    Hi Jamie, thanks for being so honest in your videos. I've been watching them for about a year and a half now since getting engaged. My boyfriend and I knew we were going to have a tiny budget and a long engagement because we wanted to get a house as a priority. We started looking at a few venues in Feb/March last year... obviously covid then hit and it became apparent we should just hold off doing anything as we both work in the service industry.
    I have all this time on my hands and can't move forward. I'm unbelievably frustrated. I could be doing so much DIY etc, but can't. I don't want to make all of it and then not end up getting married for like another 3 years. I have very little storage space.
    I feel like I've done all I can without a set date and covid numbers way WAY back down (in lockdown right now in the UK). I definitely have a vision of the theme, the styling etc and know how I'd go about DIYing parts of it. Anyways I rambled!! Just needed to vent slightly.
    Keep up the good videos, they're so helpful xx

  • @tiffanyberry7249
    @tiffanyberry7249 3 года назад +1

    Just got married in December. I watched all of your videos, but I didn't listen and took on too much. I hated my wedding. I too disliked a few of my vendors 😔 I also wish I would've booked a decorator instead of my wedding coordinator. There were red flags when she wasn't reaching out month-of but I kept making excuses for her. Oh well, I love my husband and I'm happy 😊

  • @darienkeay5819
    @darienkeay5819 2 года назад +1

    This was helpful. I’m in the beginning stages of planning and keep getting mixed advice about a wedding coordinator. Some people saying to do it and other people say to save the money you can do it yourself but honestly I can’t stop thinking about “well then who’s going to run the event day of? Certainly not me” we’re definitely going to budget for one

  • @lyds1186
    @lyds1186 3 года назад +1

    TOTALLY agree about Pinterest. It’s a gift...and a curse ☺️

  • @kirstenstuart3495
    @kirstenstuart3495 Год назад +1

    How do you get over hating your wedding? I’m about 2 weeks out at this point, and I am LOSING it and know that I will likely hate my wedding. Like I’ve thought about faking having Covid and postponing my wedding because of it multiple times in the last couple weeks. I love my fiancé and will never regret marrying him or that choice, but it’s literally everything else. I feel horrible saying that I’m going to hate my wedding because I don’t ever intend to have a “redo”, but don’t know how to move on from hating it and feeling okay with that 😣

    • @evalarkai4760
      @evalarkai4760 Год назад

      so sorry to hear you’re feeling this way. how are you holding up now that it’s all passed? Hope it was so much better than you thought it would be! ❤

  • @juliettemelodygrace6969
    @juliettemelodygrace6969 3 года назад +2

    I can’t be the only one who nearly cried watching this

  • @starzzzy22
    @starzzzy22 3 года назад +1

    I hate the idea that, as the bride, you need to know everything, answer every single question, and make all the decisions. If I could go back in time I would have delegated way more tasks early in the planning process and told people to leave me the heck alone.

  • @malyssamcneel1356
    @malyssamcneel1356 3 года назад +1

    Ummm... can we see your wedding diys? Now I’m intrigued 🧐 lol

  • @PartsUnknownn
    @PartsUnknownn 2 месяца назад

    I’m not looking forward to my wedding at all. I was pressured into having a wedding where we invited 100 people. 45 are coming, and none of my close girlfriends can make it. I’m already regretting it and all the money spent . It’s going to be lame and embarrassing.
    Can we just not show up and skip right to our honeymoon ?

  • @tr7883
    @tr7883 3 года назад +1

    Omggg I’m in the exact same position. So glad I’ve watched this! The Pinterest issues are so true because I’ve been looking at a picture which I’ve been trying to follow and now I’m comparing my centrepieces to the picture.

  • @desiraelyles3166
    @desiraelyles3166 Год назад +1

    Now that im finally engaged after watching your videos for 2 years i literally am so excited!!!!! But the overwhelming part of me is crying cause i feel like this whole process is going to stress me out 😅

  • @justjanicesierra
    @justjanicesierra 29 дней назад

    I’m currently dealing with this right now with a vendor . Her lack of communication has made it very stressful for me. I’m ready for this to be over with.

  • @tiantianzhang8476
    @tiantianzhang8476 9 месяцев назад

    Watching this made me confident about my choice of having a wedding planner. Yes it is very expensive and probably the single most expensive service I’ve paid so far in my life, and that’s including immigrating to another country, but I want my wedding day to be relaxed and joyful for both of us and not associated with stress, tears and fights.
    I’m also the type that gets overwhelmed easily and fairly disorganized. 😅 (for context the planning service is 10% of our budget for a small wedding of 50)

  • @VBoo459
    @VBoo459 10 месяцев назад

    Babe, on your wedding day?! sorry the last point you made got my anxious rocketting. I'm so sorry you went through that. My wedding venue comes with the wedding planner and coordinator (its a big family business lol) and we chose them based on yes, logistics, venue, services but also on emotions - I literally loved their personalities and immediately trusted them. I can't imagine not having a coordinator....I already know I'll be having 2 MOH, and giving my phone to one of them.

  • @midcenturygail
    @midcenturygail 5 месяцев назад

    I have been married twice and I know this much is true: photographs lie. Both of my weddings look fantastic in the photos but were, in reality, pretty miserable experiences for me.

  • @t.s.5206
    @t.s.5206 2 года назад

    My guess is your sucky vendor was either the Venue Point person, the Photographer, or maybe the Planner-Coordinator (maybe, but doubtful). The Venue basically controls virtually everything you can and can't do on the wedding. The photographer is either a Match made in Heaven or else, they/he/she suck because you and they are on two different wave lengths or their capabilities don't match up with your vision or expectations. That's what I've experienced, so maybe this was your case... Nevertheless, just know many of us feel your pain and it's something that never really goes away except by the passage of time.

  • @kimsheller3223
    @kimsheller3223 Год назад

    I just got married saturday, my dj ruined my wedding. Thought hed bring some trial equitment that he was looking to buy and not the 20000 equipment that we were promised. Music was to start at 2pm grand entrance at 330. No full songs ever played.
    No grand entrance, fallowed by no dancing or any traditional wedding things that were all planned and wrote down for dj..
    I didnt even get to eat at my wedding..
    Not djs fault but even my cake was falling over i never got to see it stacked it was a simple 3 layer cake .
    Whole day was ruined except atleast i married my bestfriend.
    Sorry all for the rant

  • @aliceh4534
    @aliceh4534 8 месяцев назад

    I love how you turned an awful pivotal experience of your life into something purposeful and positively impactful for others. Thank you for sharing! :) I relate so hard to the comparison perspective and pinterest!!

  • @Gryffindame
    @Gryffindame 5 месяцев назад

    We decided to marry at hobbiton because we don’t have to worry about decor. The only flowers we have are my bouquet, and are just letting the vibe of hobbiton take over. It’s a bit spenny but I think in the long run, cheaper and easier for us to

  • @gogetyourgun1490
    @gogetyourgun1490 Год назад

    I loved my wedding. The people who I wanted was there, & it was very short & very memorable. It was amazing. The dinner was amazing too.

  • @destinynoel9714
    @destinynoel9714 3 года назад +1

    I always recommend your channel,love watching you Jamie!!❤️ Maybe you could do a video talking through your wedding day with Elias,that would be fun,unless it would be traumatic then don’t 😂 regardless your heart and intentions with your channel really showed with this!❤️

  • @mollyjones9297
    @mollyjones9297 3 года назад +1

    Thank you Jamie, watching your channel helps relive my wedding planning stress!

  • @suitors1
    @suitors1 3 года назад +1

    THANK YOU for laying that out there! The Pinterest idea of STOP LOOKING close to the wedding...VERY GOOD THOUGHT!

  • @GlitteryCassie
    @GlitteryCassie 3 года назад +1

    I work for a wedding planner, and my ultimate dream is to own my own wedding planning business. I binge watched your channel as soon as I got hired,a nd I love all of the information you share! I am able to apply it to my job and get more out of the experience. Thank you for helping me realize I love wedding planning!

  • @TEWMUCH
    @TEWMUCH Год назад

    I'm sorry you hated your wedding. I am sorry you planned it too! That's so much work!! 😂

  • @jessicaforester450
    @jessicaforester450 3 года назад +1

    I’m so glad to see this video. My husband and I have been married 2 years and there still is not a day that goes by that I don’t hate my wedding and regret the event. Terrible food vendor, terrible photos, she missed my dance with my grand dad who had suffered a stroke but took PT to prepare for our dance. Trying to manage everything and everyone. Biggest waste of money ever. I thought I was the only one.

  • @anissaholmes4495
    @anissaholmes4495 3 месяца назад

    I’m singing ‘you are not alone.’ I’m glad other people feel this way.

  • @AnActualWoman
    @AnActualWoman Год назад

    My mom packed up my reception an hour after dinner. She waited till I got drunk and made me help. I’m still trying to heal

  • @lauraswatzyna6018
    @lauraswatzyna6018 Год назад

    Do you have a video of your wedding? How do you know if it's ok to ask someone to be the point of contact?