The second story if you read the update the fiancé was trying ti get the daughter out of their lives once they were married she didn’t like the daughter so that’s why she didn’t want her in the wedding probably didn’t even want her to go to the wedding.
Wtf? Why didn’t she like the daughter?? Oh no… what could b a bigger red flag? After all those yrs together, he didn’t get an inkling about his partner being terrible?
I remember this one, the fiancee didn't want the daughter there so she wouldn't be in the pictures and she wanted OP to be a 'Weekend Dad' when they married so OP literally took off the engagement ring from her finger and ended things. Boss move.
The dress story. They budgeted $20k for the wedding and sounds like more for the honeymoon. They already spent $14k on one day but now hes upset about spending a little over $1k on an outfit for that day. Sounds like he was happy spending their money on things that benefitted him but not things that he didnt care that much about.
I also thought that. I can understand the argument of $1000 being a lot of money for an item of clothing someone will only wear once, but expecting someone to spend $100 or to buy a very cheap dress on Wish is also extreme. There is no compromise or meeting her halfway. He is entitled to his opinion and preference, but so is the bride. People who are about to get married should be willing to listen to the other person’s standpoint and try to meet each other halfway. It doesn’t need to be either a $1000 dress or a $100 dress, there are options in between. Or at least the option to say “hey I find that a lot of money and I want to understand why you are so set on this particular dress and see if there are ways to achieve your vision by spending less, etc”.
I also think that the fact it is her own money (or her parents’ money) is relevant. He may not agree with the expense but he cannot dictate what she does with her own money, even less what her parents do with their money. If he is already behaving like this now, before marriage and before they merge their finances, how will he behave after? Is he going to control / veto all expenses he doesn’t agree with and not let his partner have any say in the spending? Will it always have to be his way and he cannot let his wife have anything unless he also agrees fully with the cost? Sounds very controlling. Also the fact that he basically is like “no I don’t agree with you buying the dress you want, so I went online to find cheap options I am okay with, and this is what you should choose from” instead of trusting the fact that his future wife did her own research into dresses, the different options and cost, and is therefore able to make an informed choice herself.
@@s.a.4358 And he has no idea how terrible of a job he did. He thought a dress from Wish was a good idea. This man didn't even know that wedding dresses are almost always tailored to fit.
I really couldn’t agree with the “he’s just afraid she’ll want to spend $500 on another dress in the future” idea in the video. I had a $500 prom dress. I don’t make a habit of buying expensive clothes, but it was my senior prom and my first prom with a date so it was very special, and my parents understood that. But it’s even worse in this situation because she’s an adult and paying for the dress herself, so the “fear” Jamie was considering for OP really just sounds like financial control. Because my partner has more expensive taste than me, and I have never even thought of trying to dictate how he spends his money (within reason that we aren’t headed for financial ruin or anything)
@@NicholeParker if he had the fear that this would become repeat behaviour, he could voice that or even the fact that “I know it’s your money but I find that really expensive and it makes me uncomfortable”. For me the problem is not that he thinks the dress she chose is expensive, the issue is that he is not willing to compromise even when he is not financially involved.
Story 2: Jamie did not read the full update, so you all missed that the Fiancée was a terrible person who was trying to cut the daughter out of OP's life. Therefore, Jamie's take missed the mark on this one. Happy OP immediately ended the relationship without hesitation.
Wow that's crazy! Yeah she really needs to read updates they're so important to the overall story. Glad OP dodged that and chose his kid that's a great dad!
@@CeramicShenanigansehhh she's not doing these for the story like we who lurk aita are, but for how to respond to it if the situation arises in your own wedding. So the discussion point with that couple was "the wedding is for both of you but talk nicely to each other" the fact that the deeper story is disturbing doesn't take away from that teaching moment!
@@CeramicShenanigansehhh she's not doing these for the story like we who lurk aita are, but for how to respond to it if the situation arises in your own wedding. So the discussion point with that couple was "the wedding is for both of you but talk nicely to each other" the fact that the deeper story is disturbing doesn't take away from that teaching moment!
@@leilasmila There is no coming back from a partner not wanting their partner's child at the wedding. That is a serious red flag that should not be ignored. If you don't want them there for one day, why would you want them there everyday????
My parents kept their wedding extremely low-cost as they had little money. The bridesmaids wore nightgowns (no one realized), there was no engagement ring, friends took the pics, etc. My mom found The Dress and it cost a more normal amount and my grandma pressured her into buying something cheaper. Everyone thought my mom looked beautiful, but she didn’t feel beautiful. Grandma is dead and my parents have been married for 45 years, but mom still regrets not being married in the dress she wanted. That’s how important “just a dress” can be to a bride.
Y’ALL I CAN’T😅 A-hole dress guy’s only other Reddit post was shared very soon after this one, and is in r/dating_advice titled: “Struggling to get back into the dating scene since my fiancée left me unexpectedly”
good for the fiancé.😂 I understand being on a budget, but a wedding dress is so important and like Jamie said it’s her dress. especially since they have the funds to do so.
🤣🤣 Story #3 had me cackling!!! He suggested a dress from Wish... WISH?!?! 🤣🤣 That man was completely out of his range for even *trying* to window shop for dresses. And that toddler comment? Way out of line.
In the future I would definitely read the updates. The second story has a completely different context if would have read the update you would have found out she assumed the daughter would be completely cut out of their lives once they were married.
In story 2 the update is that OP fiancé wanted op to significantly reduce his relationship to the point of seeing daughter 1-2 times a year after the wedding. She had not discussed this with him previously and seemed to just think that he would naturally kick his daughter to the curb after the wedding. She didn’t want daughter in pictures because she didn’t want daughter to be a part of their lives. He took his ring off her finger and then he and his daughter turned what was supposed to be the honeymoon trip into a daddy daughter trip.
Perfection would be if Emma pretended to go along with her patronizing fiance by ordering a dress on Wish. Then watched him fall apart when the Wish dress arrived.
Yeah honestly if a fiancée told me I could get the same dress cheaper on Wish I would allot an extra whatever to the dress budget and be like “alright. :) try it”
she left him actually. I found the post and he has another post that is titled "Struggling to get back into the dating scene since my fiancee left me unexpectedly." not quite sure how he could type the "unexpectedly" seriously lol Shows why he is 38 and single....
The last one... this makes me wonder what kind of engagement and wedding rings they were getting. I got married 4 years ago and we kept things really low budget. The one thing we splurged on is our rings because they are the rings we want to wear for life.
(Story 3) The issue to me is that they have $6,000 left. So she spent a little over $1,000 on a wedding dress. They already had a honeymoon fund. So what is the problem here? My husband still has no idea what I spent on my wedding dress and he doesn't care. He wanted a wedding day that made me happy and did not break the bank which I pulled off. He also wanted left alone and not pulled into drama haha as most men do.
This is the first I’ve heard of a bride being mad that a male wore white, much less a kid. This whole obsession with wedding dress code is getting ridiculous.
@@RabbidTribble I've seen another Reddit story about a guy who dressed as Corpse Bride to a costume party that became a wedding and it went wrong because the groom was jealous of the bride and her "Corpse Bride" male friend 😅
He had white pants and a white bow tie, sounds like the kid was fully in white. I would say there’s definitely a world where the bride and the groom’s sister already have a strained relationship, the bride set a clear boundary that nobody wears white (as the groom seems to have stated she talked about this before) and then EITHER the sister saw her child as an opportunity to push this boundary or the bride took it that way. A better discussion needed to happen here!
First Story) NTA that was a Bridezilla becoming insecure over a 6 year old boy not even a girl because he was wearing white pants like come on. Second Story) NTA FATHER OF THE YEAR AWARD GOES TO OP!!!! Third Story) YTA the average cost of a wedding dress is somewhere around 1k-2k the fact she found a dress for less then that is awesome I would be jumping for joy. I have seen videos of women trying Wish wedding dresses and they look nothing like the photo and the photos used to advertise the dresses on places like Wish are usually stolen from the actual designer it would have been one of those situations where “you get what you paid for.”
My wedding dress was a second hand one, £40 from eBay, bit I still spent £150 getting her cleaned and another £400 on alterations and adding pockets. I then also spent TENS of hours restitching EVERY old, yellowed sequin and changing them for gorgeous iridescent ones, I also added detachable, off shoulder sleeves. It was phenomenal and everything I first dreamed it could be when I saw it on eBay. Any wedding dress is going to add up.
Any dress or outfit from Wish is the bane of women everywhere. They never look like the pictures and are never any good. $950 for a wedding dress, $120 for a veil? That is already fairly cheap. But no, groom wants to order a $50-$100 dress from Wish. She’d be better off wearing a tissue paper dress. Actually, if it’s from Wish, it might end up being a tissue paper dress. 😑
But then, my sister got a 2000 € wedding dress pre-loved for 100 €. There are even lots of unworn dresses being sold for cheap because nowadays brides tend to change their mind out of FOMO and get second or even third dresses. An expensive boutique dress or something from wish are not the only options.
@@nriamond8010 Oh yeah. I am all for pre-loved dresses. I once helped a friend post her pre-loved wedding dress for sale on eBay. Hell, I saw a gorgeous 1900 era style wedding dress at Mangelson’s one year. It was $45 and somehow ended up near their Halloween costumes, even though you could tell it had actually been a real wedding dress. Had I been the right size, I’d have bought it then and there. Just not dresses from Wish. I’ve seen too many fails on that. By the way, I absolutely love the phrasing “pre-loved dress.”
DUDE my wedding dress is from an Outlet and it fits like a glove and it was 1100 bucks and then 300 for alterations. That is CRAZY to think 900 is a lot. So many dresses cost over 2 or 3 thousand dollars!
The first story I don’t think the groom was in the wrong. He tried to diffuse the situation in the restroom and she decided to ignore him and go confront his sister. To me it seems like she is the one that didn’t want to compromise and on top of that cause conflict with her in-laws all because of a little boy wearing white.
If that was a flower girl wearing white, would she have reacted the same? I wonder if there was already a tension between the sister-in-law and bride to begin with. She should have known better to just let it go and enjoy the special day.
I thought small children were the only exception to the “thou shalt not wear white”rule? Like kids outgrow clothes quick so parents might want to get one more wear out of that Easter dress or suit.
Ngl my aunt had her flower girls and ring bearer boys in white. I think children are probably the main exception to the rule. The kid wasn't even in FULL white. Just some white pants and tie. My sisters and I were dressed in a full white dress when I was a flower girl and my brothers were dressed in full white lil suits as the ring bearers. Idk man if you're an adult and are feeling overshadowed or threatened by some 6 year old in half white, you might have some problems and insecurities that need sorting...
Second story- he’s definitely being a good dad. Those 2 options were clear cut enough for that story imo. That’s his baby. Parenthood comes certainly first before any fiance / girlfriend who seemingly doesn’t respect that you’re a parent. Her MIT who crossed the line in inserting herself betw THEIR adult issues also needs to b chucked away. Crazy!
I can't a dress that fits me for less than 70$ for Christmas, and this guy wants to find a wedding dress at 50$? If you have some money, there's a middle ground here! How do you go from 950 to 50??? Also, in my life, I will never buy something specially fitted for me. I don't have the means. EXCEPT FOR my wedding dress. That will be, and it is for a lot of women I think, the only time that I can buy a dress "made for me" (or altered for me). I would be so sad if my fiance wanted to rob me of that chance.
I get clutching your chest at a $1000 price tag, especially for "a dress she'll only wear once". So what if she wore it more than once? Could she wear it on your honeymoon? An evening at the theater? A fancy office Christmas party where she dressed up as the Snow Queen? Seriously if a dress is that beautiful, I would want to wear it again.
The arguments these couples got into were all crazy! What is it about wedding planning that brings out the worst in people. I’ve had some minor frustrations feeling alone during the wedding planning process, but this video makes me want to go kiss my fiancé. Can’t imagine experiencing any of these scenarios in our relationship.
23:34 I do think it may have just been about control for him and less his fear that she may fixate on an expensive dress again outside of their means. & even in this scenario, the dress was withIN their means. Only because there was nothing in his explanation that implied he was afraid of her spending habits, because like u said, if that was his fiancé, he knew what her spending habits were like, knew this wasn’t the norm as she was only looking at a THREE figure dress and veil for their once in a lifetime WEDDING. And yet he was hyper fixated on the price, even tho it was within their means, even tho her parents offered to buy it and STILL he took issue. Which to me indicates it was less about money and more about control. I hate to say it since it’s only a dress but I do think that it would’ve read as a red flag to me being that he was that condescending and disregarded her feelings abt what she wanted. I’d be thinking, “well when else is he gonna behave this way and how intolerable would that be?”
I completely agree and had the same thought. I also don’t like the fact that he went online to research dresses and then all but gave her a list of options she should choose from (although he clearly has no idea about the normal cost of a formal dress, let alone a wedding dress, or the quality issues with Wish). Does he not trust his partner to have looked into the different options available before making a decision? But also, is he not able to let his partner have something she really wants even if he doesn’t care about it himself? In this case it is not even his money, yet he thinks he can dictate her choice. Seriously worrying about how he will behave after marriage when all expense are shared. Shared means that both partners have equal decision power, not that one has more right to make a decision about how to spend money. This is not the point of the post but it also illustrate well why I think having individuals accounts in addition to shared is a good idea. In a long term relationship most expenses will be shared so having a common account makes sense. But it is also good if each person has some money just for themselves. There will always be some things one person cares about more than the other, because of different hobbies, tastes, priorities, etc. I enjoy being able to buy some things for myself without having to justify it to my partner, but I also like the fact that he can do the same and spend money on things that make him happy, his hobbies, going out with his friends, etc. Do I understand why he needs another pair of cargo trousers? I really do not and I do not even like cargo trousers, but I don’t even need to worry about it because it is his decision about his money. I will spend my money on handbags instead.
I wish she had read Emma's side because there was a LOT more going on... for starters, he lied about their ages and the age gap was 20 years ("Emma" was only 23). She made substantially more money than him and had already contributed more. This situation was laden with red flags.
10:14 For Story 2, the update, I think, is really important. The bride said that she thought that once they got married the daughter, P, would not be as involved in their lives as they start their NEW family. She didn’t want P in any of the pictures cause she wouldn’t be around/ a part of their new life together. Dad was heartbroken, called off the wedding and that’s when he went on the honeymoon w/ his daughter. ❤
I don't think he wants to control what she wears, but he wants to control what she spends when they're BOTH contributing and her FAMILY is willing to spend it for her--he's a financial abuser, or he's on the verge of being one.
Story 3- dude, have you never seen say yes to the dress? $1,000 is unheard of! Plus, wish will NOT look or feel the same. It will have colored thread, look different from the picture. This is the kind of dude who would put his kids into a dangerous childcare situation, to save a few bucks.
I find it odd and suspicious that after 5 years, and apparently getting along great, it WOULDNT occur to her to include her future stepdaughter; she included her niece so it's not like she was leaning towards child free 3rd story: as soon as he said wish, I was like "oh he's not just the ah, he's a full blown idiot". Like memes about how terrible wish products are are everywhere, wtf?
I don't know if you've seen comments explaining this elsewhere, but it's not that it didn't occur to her in the 2nd story - she expected her husband would "naturally" be a "holiday only dad" instead of 50/50 after their wedding, and didn't want his daughter in the wedding photos. That's why in the update referred to in the comments, he called off the relationship and took his daughter on the vacation that *would* have been the honeymoon instead.
@@TesriaT yeah I did see those, and once I got those details I remembered actually reading that story awhile ago lol. So fucking gross, idk how or why people like her assume such things or why she'd even find a guy who would do that to his kid attractive
@@QuestionableLifeChoices i was the daughter in a similar situation but older. This is more common than you would think. Who usually do It? A golddigger
I am so happy my daughter in law was nothing like the bride in story 2. My 2 granddaughters from my son’s 1st marriage were junior bridesmaids and were apart of every step along the way. And she is a great mother to them.
The first guy should not file that marriage license. Just imagine when she really has a problem in her life. He did not go too far, she went too far when she was going to throw out his family.
Wait bro was mad about a $950.00 dress and with the veil it’s around $1k? That’s not extravagant. The story where the bride spent $9k on a dress and put it on the fiancé’s credit card is extravagant then asked for his honest opinion and he hated the dress (lol).
Jamie you are so emotionally well-adjusted. I love watching your videos for the wedding content but what I really love is hearing your well-rounded, graceful opinions on difficult situations. I look up to you a lot for it!
omg, found the post and weapons level AH gunning for a wish dress, he shortly after made a post "Struggling to get back into the dating scene since my fiancee left me unexpectedly" I am dying over here rofl
although I can understand that him threatening to leave in the first story was a hard line in the sand, she had already disrespected his sister and nephew by asking them to leave over something so trivial. imagine the groom trying to kick out any of the brides family over something ridiculous? I'd be leaving too.... she ruined her own wedding sadly.
Unpopular opinion: as a society we’ve gotten ridiculous about the “don’t wear white to a wedding.” OBVIOUSLY don’t wear a dress that looks like it could be a wedding dress but I’ve read and heard so many stories of brides freaking out over a white sundress with colorful flowers over it. I’m getting married next year and what my guests wear isn’t my biggest concern. I just want to have a good time and focus on my fiancé and I. This has truly gotten out of hand.
I bought a dress with a white background and big multicoloured flowers on it for a friend's summer wedding, and didn't find out until after I'd done so that some people freaked out over *any* white. I got so worried, but thankfully my friends are sensible people and there was no possible way of confusing me with the bride in her ballgown anyway. 😄But seriously, not wearing a plain white (or off-white, or nearly white) dress is a completely reasonable requirement, it's about not being confused with or upstaging the bride. No white of any kind at all is silly, and not a rule most people are going to know about without being told. Was she mad that people wore white shirts with suits too? It's a kid in white jeans! Which I suspect happened because the parents likely couldn't get him to wear formal trousers without a lot of crying and headaches, so white jeans were the best they could do for looking nice for the day - and then the bride threw a fit about it. Ridiculous behaviour.
Agree! For me it's also the intention that matters. My step mam, who has no notion of social norms and wears only white always, came to my wedding with white pants and shirt (my dad also came with a white suit now that I think about it). It wasn't even remotely similar to a wedding dress and she didn't do it malignantly, so who cares?! We laugh about it! Of course, if you come with a white gown and you are clearly trying to hurt or out-stage the bride, that's different.
Yep. I’d never even heard of that “rule” until I started watching bridezilla videos. I wore a cream linen tunic/pants with gold accents to my brother’s wedding and it never occurred to anyone to be unhappy about it. Certainly not my sister-in-law, who was far too busy being luminously happy to even notice or remember anyone else’s clothes. I really think that expectation was invented by insecure women, or women with lousy friends/relatives, who were concerned with other women turning up looking more like a bride than her.
I know, Prints used to be fair game because it was very clearly not bridal. Now there’s people saying you shouldn’t wear any pastel because it might be mistaken for White and pictures. People are just so far up their own, but it’s crazy.
My wedding has already passed but I can’t stop watching your videos! You’re such a kind person and love hearing you’re takes and opinions. If anyone cares my wedding day was beautiful and everything I hoped for
"Our finances will be joined." WILL BE - it's not your money yet, sir! A lady at church said it to me this way when I booked my venue for my fiance and me - it's a large purchase but ideally, it is one you only make ONCE. that doesn't mean you be irresponsible with your money, but it is okay to get something you REALLY want and will be happy. and it doesn't necessarily mean this spending will turn into a bad habit that follows you into the marriage.
The first story, the bride was absolutely 100% out of line. Women aren’t supposed to wear white to a wedding because it upstages the bride but a six-year-old little boy with white jeans and a white bowtie, mistaking him for the bride. And to ask him to leave, especially with him being familywas absolutely ridiculous and out of line and she needs to be told so because that’s just ridiculous
The poor girl in the second story, most stepchildren experience this with new stepparents. Being treated as the baggage from the first marriage. He should not marry her. his daughter could’ve stood up for him on his side.
4:18 There is no compromise when a grown ass woman cries about a 6 year old wearing white pants and a bow tie. 💀 People think they own the world on their wedding day it's ridiculous.
The problem with this story of the daughter - the bride should make the daughter her first priority to make sure she has a proper spot in the wedding. Pushing back against the groom because he wants his CHILD in the wedding is a gigantic red flag, and her objection is weird. Throw the whole bride away. Interested to see how the story ends. My opinion is this - if a soon to be step parent is already trying to edge the kid out, they shouldn’t be in their lives. The wedding shouldn’t happen. The step parent should embrace them whole heartedly or they aren’t worthy to be your spouse. Please put the kids needs in perspective - watching my dad have two crappy step parents, knowing how they really didn’t embrace the children of their new spouse, was terrible thing for all kids involved. It doesn’t just stop the minute they leave the house - it continues their lives through.
Lmao “Buy a white prome dress instead of a wedding dress”….I knew a girl who did the reverse of this…talked her rich ass parents into dropping major bucks on a wedding dress NOT EVEN FOR PROM…for freshman year Winter Formal
That first story…completely unhinged on the bride’s part 🥴 A 6yr old child? Really? Since they’ve decided to pettily and separately stay at their parents homes since the wedding and haven’t spoken, I’m not sure how promising the rest of their marriage is but it ain’t lookin too good. You definitely “poured some grave” over the situation in attempting to empathize with what the bride was potentially going thru that made her react so irrationally, and I understand how stressful weddings are for women, but I do have a hard time reasoning that those pressures, whatever they were for her, resulted in a meltdown over a 6 yr old boys outfit. Her going on to speak to the groom’s sister about it..just not the right time or place, apart from the fact that it’s so petty. Now, the groom threatening to leave along w the nephew, while I understand that’s his nephew and his sister aka his FAMILY, his wife ALSO became his family and the first he had to honor generally once they married and took vows. I understand his potential feelings of loyalty toward his family mixed in with her completely nonsensical and bratty reaction, but you’re supposed to b a partnership and beginning a newly married issue with threatening to leave ain’t it. I imagine he was heated. Unless this was completely out of character for her, I’m afraid he made his bed. He’s not the A hole, if anything she is, but he didn’t handle the situation to the best of his ability either.
Story 3: I thought she was going to drop 6k on a wedding dress and not have money left over for the bridesmaids dresses or something... Wow, 1k is great! That's actually what I spent for mine haha
As someone who is engaged to a man with 2 kids from a previous relationship, his kids will absolutely be involved and play a role! We are leaning more towards elopement vs a wedding but regardless of how it plays out they will definitely be there right by our sides! I have been in their lives since they were 3 and 4 and they are now almost 9 and 10. I knew going in he had kids and they are a huge part of his life and mine. Our whole home and life revolves around them, their school, sports/activities. I act as a mother figure to them when they are in our home. I couldn’t imagine doing it any other way. I love them like my own. I just don’t see how the fiancée can’t understand that.
The woman who had a meltdown about a 5 year old wearing white pants…… seriously, get a grip. This is when you look in the mirror and go “oh my gosh I’m insane right now, haha, that was crazy. It’s not actually a big deal” and move on.
First story… I’m kinda with the groom here. Yea calling her names wasn’t the best way to go about it but if she’s gonna kick out my family cuz of my nephews pants… I’m with him I’d leave too and my “apology” days later after her mother told me I needed to would actually have been divorce papers
I'm british. The onlypeople who I have seen wear white to a wedding were the bride, the more youthful members of her wedding party (flower girls, ring bearer, page boys etc) and the people who were escorted out. It's almost as if the sister did not understand what to bring her child in. A.K.A. anything but white. I've seen young children turn up in fairytale inspired outfits that the bride is completely happy with (snow white/belle's ball gown/ prince charming's suit etc). Just some nice, comfy trousers and a nice top would have been fine. Not a white suit. That implies that they're in the wedding. Also, a good wedding dress compromise could be a) going the second hand/ex runway dress or b) a prom/ other nice dress, that may or may not be in the colour that the bride wants. My personal preference would be a nice second hand dress. I think they're so very pretty. I might even get a second hand prom dress, if I ever get married.
1st story: Not sure how the bride could be mad and heartbroken about a 6 yr old Boy wearing white pants and bow tie?? I would be peeved if a Lady wore a white dress to my wedding. A child and a boy for that matter?? Yikes.....
I guess I was just raised under a rock and my parents as well, I didn't find out until I was in my late twenties, that you're not supposed to wear white to a wedding. I went to a friend's wedding when I was 22 and wore a white blouse in black pants. Nobody said anything. But now I hear about all these brides freaking out if somebody wears any kind of white at their wedding and it makes me not want to go to weddings at all. What other unspoken rules are there about what you're supposed to do at a wedding that I was never told but I'm going to ruin someone's day if I break the rule I didn't know about?
Eh. I don't think a white shirt with black pants is bad. Most men in suits and tuxes wear white shirts too. I think it's more "don't wear a white dress so people know who the bride is in the photos". There's an idea of not outshining the bride or trying to one up how nice she looks. A white shirt is not a huge deal to me. But I am strongly considering not even wearing a white dress to my wedding so what do I know lol
Look, I'm not from a culture that wears exclusively white for weddings; but this emotional attachment to wearing white and being THE only one to even have some white on feels like just a lot of feelings for something that isn't that important at the end of the day.
Honestly, most of these stories involve two people who are immature, selfish, and petulant. Narcissism is spreading, and it’s killing these marriages before they even begin. Learning how to communicate and own your feelings before marriage is crucial.
Listening to your advice and opinions, I think it would be a great video to make for marital/relationship advice especially going through big decisions and conflicts as you work with couples and are married yourself ❤😊 like the "i feel" language, boundaries, etc.
8:15 The other thing I would point out with this one is that the two of you are creating a new family, so it should be a given that you would want to include each other’s kids in the wedding. Telling your new stepchild that they aren’t welcome as part of the ceremony is shutting them out and making them feel like exactly that-just a STEPchild. This is cold and mean, IMO. Not the way to start off with a new family.
About the first story ... did she also complain about the men wearing white shirts? 🤨A friend of me didn't even complain when her 13 year old niece wore a completely white (but short) lace dress to her wedding. Why be bothered by a little child wearing white as part of the outfit (I mean, complaining about a white TIE? Really?!), that's just silly. The groom who does not know how much wedding dresses cost is a bit hilarious 😄but to be fair, you don't HAVE to spend 1000 $ or more on a dress, there are cheaper options (like pre-loved dresses which you can even get unworn). In hindsight, I regret a little spending 400 € for my dress (last year), my sister got a pre-loved one for 100 (original price 2000 €). And German weddings are MUCH longer than American ones, more like 12-14 hours than just 5. But they have to talk it out and find a solution or a compromise.
Lol he has no idea how wedding dress work at all. The price, the wish website (would not even look like what is pictured), alterations, $1000 being low end ect… oh boy!!!!
For story 3, I spent over 1k on my dress and that was on sale not even counting alterations. My fiancé had no problem with that. & we have way less money set aside for the wedding than they do. we are primarily paying for our wedding ourselves. everything is expensive for a wedding. he wants 6k for the honeymoon plus their honeymoon fund? what kind of honeymoon are they doing?
"WISH"?????????????????? ARE YOU KIDDING ME?????????????? RIGHT NOW?????????????? WHAT?????????????? The wedding dress is EVERYTHING to the bride. This is a day she's dreamed of since childhood. In my opinion, anything up to and including 2 to 3 grand is acceptable, ESPECIALLY if the bride is using alternative financial sourcing for said dress. You DON'T mess...... with the dress. Another point, did they not have quite a sizable budget for the honeymoon already? This is unfathomable.
Hello! You said you have a wedding planning team. I've sent two inquires asking if I can pay for your consultation. Just an hour. However, I can't get a response. How can I connect with your team?
How strange! I'm sorry to hear that. I'm not sure where you're trying to contact us and how we're missing it, but you can go straight to Rebecca at hello@wolferandco.com and she'll take care of you 🤍
@@JamieWolfer no worries! I filled out the "contact us" fork on your website and selected "other." I filled out information two times. I even mentioned that I wanted to pay 😂 but I didn't receive a response. I will send an email!
I’m very frugal, but I absolutely would not be cheaping out on a wedding dress. If I could find the dress I wanted for a cheaper price because it’s used or something, I would do it. But I would never buy a dress from wish and I certainly want the dress that I want. If a man cannot allow his bride to buy the dress she wants when there is money to do so, I don’t think he’s the right man for her.
In the first story, the bride definitely overreacted, full-stop, no matter the context. But. I could see a hypothetical situation where her feeling legitimately angry and offended was justified. If there was ongoing tension between the bride and the groom's sister (passive-aggressive mean-girl stuff that the groom wasn't aware of), and the sister deliberately dressed her son in white as a jab at the bride in response to her requests that guests not wear it, then I could see her being angry at the sister for the open and deliberate act of disrespect rather than for the outfit itself. But who knows what the real situation actually was?
First story, highly disagree... OP was definitely not the AH! The bride was making the day all about herself, when in reality is about both! If my husband threatens to kick my brother and nephew out, I'd have the same reaction, especially given the fact that A SIX YEAR OLD was wearing white PANTS! PANTS! Give me a break!
Sounds like the kid in the first story was fully dressed in white. I would say there’s definitely a world where the bride and the groom’s sister already have a strained relationship, the bride set a clear boundary that nobody wears white (as the groom seems to have stated she talked about this before) and then EITHER the sister saw her child as an opportunity to push this boundary or the bride took it that way.
I thought that the reason people aren't supposed to wear white is in case they are mistaken for the bride. Pretty sure a 6 year old boy isn't going to be mistaken for a bride...
JERRY SPRINGER IS DEAD HOW DID I MISS THIS.
lol at whomever reads this without watching the video
😂😂
Lol guilty, I was about to respond with how upset I was to hear, but now reading your comment I feel I need context 😂
Let him watch Say Yes to the Dress.,
That’s what I thought too..
The second story if you read the update the fiancé was trying ti get the daughter out of their lives once they were married she didn’t like the daughter so that’s why she didn’t want her in the wedding probably didn’t even want her to go to the wedding.
Wtf? Why didn’t she like the daughter?? Oh no… what could b a bigger red flag? After all those yrs together, he didn’t get an inkling about his partner being terrible?
I remember this one, the fiancee didn't want the daughter there so she wouldn't be in the pictures and she wanted OP to be a 'Weekend Dad' when they married so OP literally took off the engagement ring from her finger and ended things. Boss move.
Yup. She didn’t want the daughter in the photos because of that
@@jessbeingme8155not even a weekend dad. She assumed (for some reason) that the dad with 50/50 custody would just become a HOLIDAY dad.
Yeah I was so upset she didn’t read the update because holy cow is t a doozy!
The dress story. They budgeted $20k for the wedding and sounds like more for the honeymoon. They already spent $14k on one day but now hes upset about spending a little over $1k on an outfit for that day. Sounds like he was happy spending their money on things that benefitted him but not things that he didnt care that much about.
I also thought that. I can understand the argument of $1000 being a lot of money for an item of clothing someone will only wear once, but expecting someone to spend $100 or to buy a very cheap dress on Wish is also extreme. There is no compromise or meeting her halfway. He is entitled to his opinion and preference, but so is the bride. People who are about to get married should be willing to listen to the other person’s standpoint and try to meet each other halfway. It doesn’t need to be either a $1000 dress or a $100 dress, there are options in between. Or at least the option to say “hey I find that a lot of money and I want to understand why you are so set on this particular dress and see if there are ways to achieve your vision by spending less, etc”.
I also think that the fact it is her own money (or her parents’ money) is relevant. He may not agree with the expense but he cannot dictate what she does with her own money, even less what her parents do with their money. If he is already behaving like this now, before marriage and before they merge their finances, how will he behave after? Is he going to control / veto all expenses he doesn’t agree with and not let his partner have any say in the spending? Will it always have to be his way and he cannot let his wife have anything unless he also agrees fully with the cost? Sounds very controlling.
Also the fact that he basically is like “no I don’t agree with you buying the dress you want, so I went online to find cheap options I am okay with, and this is what you should choose from” instead of trusting the fact that his future wife did her own research into dresses, the different options and cost, and is therefore able to make an informed choice herself.
@@s.a.4358 And he has no idea how terrible of a job he did. He thought a dress from Wish was a good idea. This man didn't even know that wedding dresses are almost always tailored to fit.
I really couldn’t agree with the “he’s just afraid she’ll want to spend $500 on another dress in the future” idea in the video. I had a $500 prom dress. I don’t make a habit of buying expensive clothes, but it was my senior prom and my first prom with a date so it was very special, and my parents understood that. But it’s even worse in this situation because she’s an adult and paying for the dress herself, so the “fear” Jamie was considering for OP really just sounds like financial control. Because my partner has more expensive taste than me, and I have never even thought of trying to dictate how he spends his money (within reason that we aren’t headed for financial ruin or anything)
@@NicholeParker if he had the fear that this would become repeat behaviour, he could voice that or even the fact that “I know it’s your money but I find that really expensive and it makes me uncomfortable”. For me the problem is not that he thinks the dress she chose is expensive, the issue is that he is not willing to compromise even when he is not financially involved.
Story 2: Jamie did not read the full update, so you all missed that the Fiancée was a terrible person who was trying to cut the daughter out of OP's life. Therefore, Jamie's take missed the mark on this one. Happy OP immediately ended the relationship without hesitation.
Wow that's crazy! Yeah she really needs to read updates they're so important to the overall story. Glad OP dodged that and chose his kid that's a great dad!
@@CeramicShenanigansehhh she's not doing these for the story like we who lurk aita are, but for how to respond to it if the situation arises in your own wedding. So the discussion point with that couple was "the wedding is for both of you but talk nicely to each other" the fact that the deeper story is disturbing doesn't take away from that teaching moment!
@@CeramicShenanigansehhh she's not doing these for the story like we who lurk aita are, but for how to respond to it if the situation arises in your own wedding. So the discussion point with that couple was "the wedding is for both of you but talk nicely to each other" the fact that the deeper story is disturbing doesn't take away from that teaching moment!
Fiance literally said something about hoping man would become a "holidays only dad" to his daughter.
@@leilasmila There is no coming back from a partner not wanting their partner's child at the wedding. That is a serious red flag that should not be ignored. If you don't want them there for one day, why would you want them there everyday????
My parents kept their wedding extremely low-cost as they had little money. The bridesmaids wore nightgowns (no one realized), there was no engagement ring, friends took the pics, etc. My mom found The Dress and it cost a more normal amount and my grandma pressured her into buying something cheaper.
Everyone thought my mom looked beautiful, but she didn’t feel beautiful. Grandma is dead and my parents have been married for 45 years, but mom still regrets not being married in the dress she wanted.
That’s how important “just a dress” can be to a bride.
Y’ALL I CAN’T😅
A-hole dress guy’s only other Reddit post was shared very soon after this one, and is in r/dating_advice titled: “Struggling to get back into the dating scene since my fiancée left me unexpectedly”
STOPPPPP 👀👀👀
good for the fiancé.😂 I understand being on a budget, but a wedding dress is so important and like Jamie said it’s her dress. especially since they have the funds to do so.
🤣🤣 Story #3 had me cackling!!! He suggested a dress from Wish... WISH?!?! 🤣🤣 That man was completely out of his range for even *trying* to window shop for dresses. And that toddler comment? Way out of line.
Somebody drop this man Safiya Nygaard’s video on ordering Wish wedding dresses. That ought to do it.
In the future I would definitely read the updates. The second story has a completely different context if would have read the update you would have found out she assumed the daughter would be completely cut out of their lives once they were married.
Yeah, I’m really confused as to why she didn’t read that part. Context is really helpful and important!
In story 2 the update is that OP fiancé wanted op to significantly reduce his relationship to the point of seeing daughter 1-2 times a year after the wedding. She had not discussed this with him previously and seemed to just think that he would naturally kick his daughter to the curb after the wedding. She didn’t want daughter in pictures because she didn’t want daughter to be a part of their lives. He took his ring off her finger and then he and his daughter turned what was supposed to be the honeymoon trip into a daddy daughter trip.
Lovely ending
Perfection would be if Emma pretended to go along with her patronizing fiance by ordering a dress on Wish. Then watched him fall apart when the Wish dress arrived.
Yeah honestly if a fiancée told me I could get the same dress cheaper on Wish I would allot an extra whatever to the dress budget and be like “alright. :) try it”
she left him actually. I found the post and he has another post that is titled "Struggling to get back into the dating scene since my fiancee left me unexpectedly." not quite sure how he could type the "unexpectedly" seriously lol Shows why he is 38 and single....
The last one... this makes me wonder what kind of engagement and wedding rings they were getting. I got married 4 years ago and we kept things really low budget. The one thing we splurged on is our rings because they are the rings we want to wear for life.
Maybe he found that on Wish too
@brynna8619 I feel like he splurged at Walmart and it's a cz
(Story 3) The issue to me is that they have $6,000 left. So she spent a little over $1,000 on a wedding dress. They already had a honeymoon fund. So what is the problem here? My husband still has no idea what I spent on my wedding dress and he doesn't care. He wanted a wedding day that made me happy and did not break the bank which I pulled off. He also wanted left alone and not pulled into drama haha as most men do.
6!! Year old in white beign the cause of the brides adult meltdown is embarrassing... Groom might want to think about therapy.
Wait groomsmen wear white shirts so why cause a big issue because a 6yr old has a white shirt on?
This is the first I’ve heard of a bride being mad that a male wore white, much less a kid. This whole obsession with wedding dress code is getting ridiculous.
@@RabbidTribble I've seen another Reddit story about a guy who dressed as Corpse Bride to a costume party that became a wedding and it went wrong because the groom was jealous of the bride and her "Corpse Bride" male friend 😅
He had white pants and a white bow tie, sounds like the kid was fully in white. I would say there’s definitely a world where the bride and the groom’s sister already have a strained relationship, the bride set a clear boundary that nobody wears white (as the groom seems to have stated she talked about this before) and then EITHER the sister saw her child as an opportunity to push this boundary or the bride took it that way. A better discussion needed to happen here!
First Story) NTA that was a Bridezilla becoming insecure over a 6 year old boy not even a girl because he was wearing white pants like come on.
Second Story) NTA FATHER OF THE YEAR AWARD GOES TO OP!!!!
Third Story) YTA the average cost of a wedding dress is somewhere around 1k-2k the fact she found a dress for less then that is awesome I would be jumping for joy. I have seen videos of women trying Wish wedding dresses and they look nothing like the photo and the photos used to advertise the dresses on places like Wish are usually stolen from the actual designer it would have been one of those situations where “you get what you paid for.”
I love the phrase you use “let’s pour some grace on this”… so true
My wedding dress was a second hand one, £40 from eBay, bit I still spent £150 getting her cleaned and another £400 on alterations and adding pockets. I then also spent TENS of hours restitching EVERY old, yellowed sequin and changing them for gorgeous iridescent ones, I also added detachable, off shoulder sleeves. It was phenomenal and everything I first dreamed it could be when I saw it on eBay.
Any wedding dress is going to add up.
Pockets!!!! 🤯
I really want to see a final pic of your dress, now!
Any dress or outfit from Wish is the bane of women everywhere. They never look like the pictures and are never any good.
$950 for a wedding dress, $120 for a veil? That is already fairly cheap.
But no, groom wants to order a $50-$100 dress from Wish. She’d be better off wearing a tissue paper dress. Actually, if it’s from Wish, it might end up being a tissue paper dress. 😑
I would be forcing the groom to watch WISH videos on RUclips to show how dumb the site is. It's a meme at this point.
But then, my sister got a 2000 € wedding dress pre-loved for 100 €. There are even lots of unworn dresses being sold for cheap because nowadays brides tend to change their mind out of FOMO and get second or even third dresses. An expensive boutique dress or something from wish are not the only options.
@@nriamond8010 Oh yeah. I am all for pre-loved dresses. I once helped a friend post her pre-loved wedding dress for sale on eBay.
Hell, I saw a gorgeous 1900 era style wedding dress at Mangelson’s one year. It was $45 and somehow ended up near their Halloween costumes, even though you could tell it had actually been a real wedding dress. Had I been the right size, I’d have bought it then and there.
Just not dresses from Wish. I’ve seen too many fails on that.
By the way, I absolutely love the phrasing “pre-loved dress.”
DUDE my wedding dress is from an Outlet and it fits like a glove and it was 1100 bucks and then 300 for alterations. That is CRAZY to think 900 is a lot. So many dresses cost over 2 or 3 thousand dollars!
The first story I don’t think the groom was in the wrong. He tried to diffuse the situation in the restroom and she decided to ignore him and go confront his sister. To me it seems like she is the one that didn’t want to compromise and on top of that cause conflict with her in-laws all because of a little boy wearing white.
If that was a flower girl wearing white, would she have reacted the same? I wonder if there was already a tension between the sister-in-law and bride to begin with. She should have known better to just let it go and enjoy the special day.
AGREED! That bride ruined her own wedding
Agreed.. Why would anyone feel offended by what a kid was wearing.. Id be too busy enjoying myself on my wedding day
I thought small children were the only exception to the “thou shalt not wear white”rule? Like kids outgrow clothes quick so parents might want to get one more wear out of that Easter dress or suit.
Ngl my aunt had her flower girls and ring bearer boys in white. I think children are probably the main exception to the rule. The kid wasn't even in FULL white. Just some white pants and tie. My sisters and I were dressed in a full white dress when I was a flower girl and my brothers were dressed in full white lil suits as the ring bearers.
Idk man if you're an adult and are feeling overshadowed or threatened by some 6 year old in half white, you might have some problems and insecurities that need sorting...
Jamie I hate to break it to you, but Jerry Springer is no longer on the air because Jerry Springer is dead 😅
Second story- he’s definitely being a good dad. Those 2 options were clear cut enough for that story imo. That’s his baby. Parenthood comes certainly first before any fiance / girlfriend who seemingly doesn’t respect that you’re a parent. Her MIT who crossed the line in inserting herself betw THEIR adult issues also needs to b chucked away. Crazy!
I can't a dress that fits me for less than 70$ for Christmas, and this guy wants to find a wedding dress at 50$? If you have some money, there's a middle ground here! How do you go from 950 to 50???
Also, in my life, I will never buy something specially fitted for me. I don't have the means. EXCEPT FOR my wedding dress. That will be, and it is for a lot of women I think, the only time that I can buy a dress "made for me" (or altered for me). I would be so sad if my fiance wanted to rob me of that chance.
I get clutching your chest at a $1000 price tag, especially for "a dress she'll only wear once". So what if she wore it more than once? Could she wear it on your honeymoon? An evening at the theater? A fancy office Christmas party where she dressed up as the Snow Queen? Seriously if a dress is that beautiful, I would want to wear it again.
You read "on Wish" and I immediately exclaimed NO!! You cannot risk buying wedding dresses on Wish, babe no 😭😭😭
I feel like a lot of these wedding AITA are less who's the A and more "why are you even together?"
I reference that scene from Oceans sometimes, I thought I was the only one haha "How long did you leave it there? Next day."
The arguments these couples got into were all crazy! What is it about wedding planning that brings out the worst in people. I’ve had some minor frustrations feeling alone during the wedding planning process, but this video makes me want to go kiss my fiancé. Can’t imagine experiencing any of these scenarios in our relationship.
23:34 I do think it may have just been about control for him and less his fear that she may fixate on an expensive dress again outside of their means. & even in this scenario, the dress was withIN their means. Only because there was nothing in his explanation that implied he was afraid of her spending habits, because like u said, if that was his fiancé, he knew what her spending habits were like, knew this wasn’t the norm as she was only looking at a THREE figure dress and veil for their once in a lifetime WEDDING. And yet he was hyper fixated on the price, even tho it was within their means, even tho her parents offered to buy it and STILL he took issue. Which to me indicates it was less about money and more about control. I hate to say it since it’s only a dress but I do think that it would’ve read as a red flag to me being that he was that condescending and disregarded her feelings abt what she wanted. I’d be thinking, “well when else is he gonna behave this way and how intolerable would that be?”
I completely agree and had the same thought. I also don’t like the fact that he went online to research dresses and then all but gave her a list of options she should choose from (although he clearly has no idea about the normal cost of a formal dress, let alone a wedding dress, or the quality issues with Wish). Does he not trust his partner to have looked into the different options available before making a decision? But also, is he not able to let his partner have something she really wants even if he doesn’t care about it himself? In this case it is not even his money, yet he thinks he can dictate her choice. Seriously worrying about how he will behave after marriage when all expense are shared. Shared means that both partners have equal decision power, not that one has more right to make a decision about how to spend money.
This is not the point of the post but it also illustrate well why I think having individuals accounts in addition to shared is a good idea. In a long term relationship most expenses will be shared so having a common account makes sense. But it is also good if each person has some money just for themselves. There will always be some things one person cares about more than the other, because of different hobbies, tastes, priorities, etc. I enjoy being able to buy some things for myself without having to justify it to my partner, but I also like the fact that he can do the same and spend money on things that make him happy, his hobbies, going out with his friends, etc. Do I understand why he needs another pair of cargo trousers? I really do not and I do not even like cargo trousers, but I don’t even need to worry about it because it is his decision about his money. I will spend my money on handbags instead.
I wish she had read Emma's side because there was a LOT more going on... for starters, he lied about their ages and the age gap was 20 years ("Emma" was only 23). She made substantially more money than him and had already contributed more. This situation was laden with red flags.
Kicking a 6 year old out of your wedding is petty …
10:14 For Story 2, the update, I think, is really important.
The bride said that she thought that once they got married the daughter, P, would not be as involved in their lives as they start their NEW family. She didn’t want P in any of the pictures cause she wouldn’t be around/ a part of their new life together.
Dad was heartbroken, called off the wedding and that’s when he went on the honeymoon w/ his daughter. ❤
Love your channel! Not formally engaged yet but been binging your videos and podcast.
Man, I need updates to these stories lol. Don't leave me on a cliff hanger, Jamie!
Right. Are they still married?! DID they marry?!
I don't think he wants to control what she wears, but he wants to control what she spends when they're BOTH contributing and her FAMILY is willing to spend it for her--he's a financial abuser, or he's on the verge of being one.
Story 3- dude, have you never seen say yes to the dress? $1,000 is unheard of! Plus, wish will NOT look or feel the same. It will have colored thread, look different from the picture. This is the kind of dude who would put his kids into a dangerous childcare situation, to save a few bucks.
I find it odd and suspicious that after 5 years, and apparently getting along great, it WOULDNT occur to her to include her future stepdaughter; she included her niece so it's not like she was leaning towards child free
3rd story: as soon as he said wish, I was like "oh he's not just the ah, he's a full blown idiot". Like memes about how terrible wish products are are everywhere, wtf?
I don't know if you've seen comments explaining this elsewhere, but it's not that it didn't occur to her in the 2nd story - she expected her husband would "naturally" be a "holiday only dad" instead of 50/50 after their wedding, and didn't want his daughter in the wedding photos. That's why in the update referred to in the comments, he called off the relationship and took his daughter on the vacation that *would* have been the honeymoon instead.
@@TesriaT yeah I did see those, and once I got those details I remembered actually reading that story awhile ago lol. So fucking gross, idk how or why people like her assume such things or why she'd even find a guy who would do that to his kid attractive
@@QuestionableLifeChoices i was the daughter in a similar situation but older. This is more common than you would think.
Who usually do It?
A golddigger
Jerry Springer died babe 😂
I am so happy my daughter in law was nothing like the bride in story 2. My 2 granddaughters from my son’s 1st marriage were junior bridesmaids and were apart of every step along the way. And she is a great mother to them.
The first guy should not file that marriage license. Just imagine when she really has a problem in her life. He did not go too far, she went too far when she was going to throw out his family.
Wait bro was mad about a $950.00 dress and with the veil it’s around $1k? That’s not extravagant. The story where the bride spent $9k on a dress and put it on the fiancé’s credit card is extravagant then asked for his honest opinion and he hated the dress (lol).
Jamie you are so emotionally well-adjusted. I love watching your videos for the wedding content but what I really love is hearing your well-rounded, graceful opinions on difficult situations. I look up to you a lot for it!
I know this isn't the point, but I was just happy the kid had on pants 🤷 I love your reaction to these. Sending hugs 💜
IKR? Priorities 😂
omg, found the post and weapons level AH gunning for a wish dress, he shortly after made a post "Struggling to get back into the dating scene since my fiancee left me unexpectedly" I am dying over here rofl
If the groom wants his daughter in the wedding she should be. I would not marry someone who didn’t care about my kids.
The bride getting mad that a six year old boy is wearing white is crazy Omg he’s a kid 😅
although I can understand that him threatening to leave in the first story was a hard line in the sand, she had already disrespected his sister and nephew by asking them to leave over something so trivial. imagine the groom trying to kick out any of the brides family over something ridiculous? I'd be leaving too.... she ruined her own wedding sadly.
Unpopular opinion: as a society we’ve gotten ridiculous about the “don’t wear white to a wedding.” OBVIOUSLY don’t wear a dress that looks like it could be a wedding dress but I’ve read and heard so many stories of brides freaking out over a white sundress with colorful flowers over it. I’m getting married next year and what my guests wear isn’t my biggest concern. I just want to have a good time and focus on my fiancé and I. This has truly gotten out of hand.
I bought a dress with a white background and big multicoloured flowers on it for a friend's summer wedding, and didn't find out until after I'd done so that some people freaked out over *any* white. I got so worried, but thankfully my friends are sensible people and there was no possible way of confusing me with the bride in her ballgown anyway. 😄But seriously, not wearing a plain white (or off-white, or nearly white) dress is a completely reasonable requirement, it's about not being confused with or upstaging the bride. No white of any kind at all is silly, and not a rule most people are going to know about without being told. Was she mad that people wore white shirts with suits too? It's a kid in white jeans! Which I suspect happened because the parents likely couldn't get him to wear formal trousers without a lot of crying and headaches, so white jeans were the best they could do for looking nice for the day - and then the bride threw a fit about it. Ridiculous behaviour.
Agree! For me it's also the intention that matters. My step mam, who has no notion of social norms and wears only white always, came to my wedding with white pants and shirt (my dad also came with a white suit now that I think about it). It wasn't even remotely similar to a wedding dress and she didn't do it malignantly, so who cares?! We laugh about it! Of course, if you come with a white gown and you are clearly trying to hurt or out-stage the bride, that's different.
Yep. I’d never even heard of that “rule” until I started watching bridezilla videos. I wore a cream linen tunic/pants with gold accents to my brother’s wedding and it never occurred to anyone to be unhappy about it.
Certainly not my sister-in-law, who was far too busy being luminously happy to even notice or remember anyone else’s clothes.
I really think that expectation was invented by insecure women, or women with lousy friends/relatives, who were concerned with other women turning up looking more like a bride than her.
I know, Prints used to be fair game because it was very clearly not bridal. Now there’s people saying you shouldn’t wear any pastel because it might be mistaken for White and pictures. People are just so far up their own, but it’s crazy.
I know this is an old comment but I so agree!! The general micro-management of what guests wear to weddings is insane to me.
My wedding has already passed but I can’t stop watching your videos! You’re such a kind person and love hearing you’re takes and opinions. If anyone cares my wedding day was beautiful and everything I hoped for
It's always lovely to hear about a wonderful wedding that managed to be free from any memory-ruining drama.
"Our finances will be joined."
WILL BE - it's not your money yet, sir!
A lady at church said it to me this way when I booked my venue for my fiance and me - it's a large purchase but ideally, it is one you only make ONCE. that doesn't mean you be irresponsible with your money, but it is okay to get something you REALLY want and will be happy. and it doesn't necessarily mean this spending will turn into a bad habit that follows you into the marriage.
The first story, the bride was absolutely 100% out of line. Women aren’t supposed to wear white to a wedding because it upstages the bride but a six-year-old little boy with white jeans and a white bowtie, mistaking him for the bride. And to ask him to leave, especially with him being familywas absolutely ridiculous and out of line and she needs to be told so because that’s just ridiculous
That wish wedding dress one is like… certainly fake
The fiancé definitely singled out the daughter, you’re trying to see the good side of a woman with bad intentions
The poor girl in the second story, most stepchildren experience this with new stepparents. Being treated as the baggage from the first marriage. He should not marry her. his daughter could’ve stood up for him on his side.
You really need to read the updates. Sometimes they change the story drastically. It's all about context.
4:18
There is no compromise when a grown ass woman cries about a 6 year old wearing white pants and a bow tie. 💀 People think they own the world on their wedding day it's ridiculous.
I don’t think either of the first two men were the asshole and agree with their decisions.
The problem with this story of the daughter - the bride should make the daughter her first priority to make sure she has a proper spot in the wedding. Pushing back against the groom because he wants his CHILD in the wedding is a gigantic red flag, and her objection is weird. Throw the whole bride away. Interested to see how the story ends.
My opinion is this - if a soon to be step parent is already trying to edge the kid out, they shouldn’t be in their lives. The wedding shouldn’t happen. The step parent should embrace them whole heartedly or they aren’t worthy to be your spouse. Please put the kids needs in perspective - watching my dad have two crappy step parents, knowing how they really didn’t embrace the children of their new spouse, was terrible thing for all kids involved. It doesn’t just stop the minute they leave the house - it continues their lives through.
I love these videos, it gets me through part of my workout 🩶
I got my dress for $250, BUT, that's because it was on clearance at a reputable boutique. There are many ways to save money, Wish is not it 😂
Lmao “Buy a white prome dress instead of a wedding dress”….I knew a girl who did the reverse of this…talked her rich ass parents into dropping major bucks on a wedding dress NOT EVEN FOR PROM…for freshman year Winter Formal
Story 1: the bride is nuts
Aita wedding videos are my favorite!
That first story…completely unhinged on the bride’s part 🥴 A 6yr old child? Really? Since they’ve decided to pettily and separately stay at their parents homes since the wedding and haven’t spoken, I’m not sure how promising the rest of their marriage is but it ain’t lookin too good. You definitely “poured some grave” over the situation in attempting to empathize with what the bride was potentially going thru that made her react so irrationally, and I understand how stressful weddings are for women, but I do have a hard time reasoning that those pressures, whatever they were for her, resulted in a meltdown over a 6 yr old boys outfit. Her going on to speak to the groom’s sister about it..just not the right time or place, apart from the fact that it’s so petty. Now, the groom threatening to leave along w the nephew, while I understand that’s his nephew and his sister aka his FAMILY, his wife ALSO became his family and the first he had to honor generally once they married and took vows. I understand his potential feelings of loyalty toward his family mixed in with her completely nonsensical and bratty reaction, but you’re supposed to b a partnership and beginning a newly married issue with threatening to leave ain’t it. I imagine he was heated. Unless this was completely out of character for her, I’m afraid he made his bed. He’s not the A hole, if anything she is, but he didn’t handle the situation to the best of his ability either.
4:29 She is delulu 😂
Story 3: I thought she was going to drop 6k on a wedding dress and not have money left over for the bridesmaids dresses or something... Wow, 1k is great! That's actually what I spent for mine haha
As someone who is engaged to a man with 2 kids from a previous relationship, his kids will absolutely be involved and play a role! We are leaning more towards elopement vs a wedding but regardless of how it plays out they will definitely be there right by our sides! I have been in their lives since they were 3 and 4 and they are now almost 9 and 10. I knew going in he had kids and they are a huge part of his life and mine. Our whole home and life revolves around them, their school, sports/activities. I act as a mother figure to them when they are in our home. I couldn’t imagine doing it any other way. I love them like my own. I just don’t see how the fiancée can’t understand that.
"If you're watching this, you're probably engaged, planning a wedding..."
Me, married for 19 years: "Mm, yes, continue."
Anyone defending the wife in the first one is insane 😂😂😂
The woman who had a meltdown about a 5 year old wearing white pants…… seriously, get a grip. This is when you look in the mirror and go “oh my gosh I’m insane right now, haha, that was crazy. It’s not actually a big deal” and move on.
First story… I’m kinda with the groom here. Yea calling her names wasn’t the best way to go about it but if she’s gonna kick out my family cuz of my nephews pants… I’m with him I’d leave too and my “apology” days later after her mother told me I needed to would actually have been divorce papers
I get so tired of people saying they headed from their mother n law 😂 what
I'm british. The onlypeople who I have seen wear white to a wedding were the bride, the more youthful members of her wedding party (flower girls, ring bearer, page boys etc) and the people who were escorted out. It's almost as if the sister did not understand what to bring her child in. A.K.A. anything but white. I've seen young children turn up in fairytale inspired outfits that the bride is completely happy with (snow white/belle's ball gown/ prince charming's suit etc). Just some nice, comfy trousers and a nice top would have been fine. Not a white suit. That implies that they're in the wedding.
Also, a good wedding dress compromise could be a) going the second hand/ex runway dress or b) a prom/ other nice dress, that may or may not be in the colour that the bride wants. My personal preference would be a nice second hand dress. I think they're so very pretty. I might even get a second hand prom dress, if I ever get married.
17:20 WISH!?!? 😂😂😂😂😂
1st story: Not sure how the bride could be mad and heartbroken about a 6 yr old Boy wearing white pants and bow tie?? I would be peeved if a Lady wore a white dress to my wedding. A child and a boy for that matter?? Yikes.....
I guess I was just raised under a rock and my parents as well, I didn't find out until I was in my late twenties, that you're not supposed to wear white to a wedding. I went to a friend's wedding when I was 22 and wore a white blouse in black pants. Nobody said anything. But now I hear about all these brides freaking out if somebody wears any kind of white at their wedding and it makes me not want to go to weddings at all. What other unspoken rules are there about what you're supposed to do at a wedding that I was never told but I'm going to ruin someone's day if I break the rule I didn't know about?
Eh. I don't think a white shirt with black pants is bad. Most men in suits and tuxes wear white shirts too. I think it's more "don't wear a white dress so people know who the bride is in the photos". There's an idea of not outshining the bride or trying to one up how nice she looks. A white shirt is not a huge deal to me. But I am strongly considering not even wearing a white dress to my wedding so what do I know lol
Wish?? 🤣🤣🤣🤣 GTFO!!! We all know they won’t look like the pictures!
Look, I'm not from a culture that wears exclusively white for weddings; but this emotional attachment to wearing white and being THE only one to even have some white on feels like just a lot of feelings for something that isn't that important at the end of the day.
I so needed this today thank you!!😊😊😊😊
Honestly, most of these stories involve two people who are immature, selfish, and petulant. Narcissism is spreading, and it’s killing these marriages before they even begin. Learning how to communicate and own your feelings before marriage is crucial.
The second story the daughter should have been in the wedding period! Find a part for her! Not that hard! The bride seems selfish.
Listening to your advice and opinions, I think it would be a great video to make for marital/relationship advice especially going through big decisions and conflicts as you work with couples and are married yourself ❤😊 like the "i feel" language, boundaries, etc.
8:15 The other thing I would point out with this one is that the two of you are creating a new family, so it should be a given that you would want to include each other’s kids in the wedding. Telling your new stepchild that they aren’t welcome as part of the ceremony is shutting them out and making them feel like exactly that-just a STEPchild. This is cold and mean, IMO. Not the way to start off with a new family.
About the first story ... did she also complain about the men wearing white shirts? 🤨A friend of me didn't even complain when her 13 year old niece wore a completely white (but short) lace dress to her wedding. Why be bothered by a little child wearing white as part of the outfit (I mean, complaining about a white TIE? Really?!), that's just silly.
The groom who does not know how much wedding dresses cost is a bit hilarious 😄but to be fair, you don't HAVE to spend 1000 $ or more on a dress, there are cheaper options (like pre-loved dresses which you can even get unworn). In hindsight, I regret a little spending 400 € for my dress (last year), my sister got a pre-loved one for 100 (original price 2000 €). And German weddings are MUCH longer than American ones, more like 12-14 hours than just 5. But they have to talk it out and find a solution or a compromise.
Lol he has no idea how wedding dress work at all. The price, the wish website (would not even look like what is pictured), alterations, $1000 being low end ect… oh boy!!!!
For story 3, I spent over 1k on my dress and that was on sale not even counting alterations. My fiancé had no problem with that. & we have way less money set aside for the wedding than they do. we are primarily paying for our wedding ourselves. everything is expensive for a wedding. he wants 6k for the honeymoon plus their honeymoon fund? what kind of honeymoon are they doing?
"WISH"?????????????????? ARE YOU KIDDING ME?????????????? RIGHT NOW?????????????? WHAT?????????????? The wedding dress is EVERYTHING to the bride. This is a day she's dreamed of since childhood. In my opinion, anything up to and including 2 to 3 grand is acceptable, ESPECIALLY if the bride is using alternative financial sourcing for said dress. You DON'T mess...... with the dress. Another point, did they not have quite a sizable budget for the honeymoon already? This is unfathomable.
Fiancée left in the 3rd story
Story 1: it’s not about the child. I hope her husband can see that hindsight.
Your laugh makes me giggle SO much!
Yes! Stay out of the dress shopping buddy!
I mean I’d be worried by the cost of that kind of dress too. I wouldn’t like it, but I’d let it slide. We’re not very well off.
Hello! You said you have a wedding planning team. I've sent two inquires asking if I can pay for your consultation. Just an hour. However, I can't get a response. How can I connect with your team?
How strange! I'm sorry to hear that. I'm not sure where you're trying to contact us and how we're missing it, but you can go straight to Rebecca at hello@wolferandco.com and she'll take care of you 🤍
@@JamieWolfer no worries! I filled out the "contact us" fork on your website and selected "other." I filled out information two times. I even mentioned that I wanted to pay 😂 but I didn't receive a response. I will send an email!
I’m very frugal, but I absolutely would not be cheaping out on a wedding dress. If I could find the dress I wanted for a cheaper price because it’s used or something, I would do it. But I would never buy a dress from wish and I certainly want the dress that I want. If a man cannot allow his bride to buy the dress she wants when there is money to do so, I don’t think he’s the right man for her.
In the first story, the bride definitely overreacted, full-stop, no matter the context. But. I could see a hypothetical situation where her feeling legitimately angry and offended was justified. If there was ongoing tension between the bride and the groom's sister (passive-aggressive mean-girl stuff that the groom wasn't aware of), and the sister deliberately dressed her son in white as a jab at the bride in response to her requests that guests not wear it, then I could see her being angry at the sister for the open and deliberate act of disrespect rather than for the outfit itself. But who knows what the real situation actually was?
First story, highly disagree... OP was definitely not the AH! The bride was making the day all about herself, when in reality is about both! If my husband threatens to kick my brother and nephew out, I'd have the same reaction, especially given the fact that A SIX YEAR OLD was wearing white PANTS! PANTS! Give me a break!
Sounds like the kid in the first story was fully dressed in white. I would say there’s definitely a world where the bride and the groom’s sister already have a strained relationship, the bride set a clear boundary that nobody wears white (as the groom seems to have stated she talked about this before) and then EITHER the sister saw her child as an opportunity to push this boundary or the bride took it that way.
I thought that the reason people aren't supposed to wear white is in case they are mistaken for the bride. Pretty sure a 6 year old boy isn't going to be mistaken for a bride...
I would like more of you didn’t told reddit opnion until de end
Story 3 😂