Shame is a way of staying alive. How I survived childhood trauma.

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  • Опубликовано: 26 ноя 2024
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Комментарии • 166

  • @Pilgrim-y6k
    @Pilgrim-y6k 2 дня назад +9

    Shame is such an insidious thing when we take it on as children. It is a shame of being, rather than a shame of doing. It has taken me a long time to even be able to identify what shame feels like because it had been such a natural part of me. Now because of greater self-acceptance, I finally have a gauge for identifying the feeling of shame when someone tries to put it on me.

    • @Call-Me-Sam
      @Call-Me-Sam  2 дня назад +3

      You put so clearly.... "It is a shame of being, rather than a shame of doing. " Me too, only over the last year have I realised what it was, it was so familiar and had always been there.
      Thank you for this

    • @innermeetme
      @innermeetme 2 дня назад +1

      I also have recently learned what this feels like

  • @moonshore
    @moonshore 4 дня назад +58

    Your videos illuminate the human condition unlike anything else on youtube. I strive to someday have the clarity and insight you are showing on these videos. The human spirit is resilient but the ways we cope with trauma can seriously hinder our ability to live. You are truly amazing. Thank you beyond words for these videos.

  • @karentonks7581
    @karentonks7581 4 дня назад +51

    When we are abused as children we take it as something wrong with us . And it's so insidious because it stays for a lifetime ❤ thanks Sam as always

    • @Call-Me-Sam
      @Call-Me-Sam  4 дня назад +3

      True words. Thanks Karen. I hope you're doing well.

    • @brigitte9999
      @brigitte9999 4 дня назад +5

      You are so correct using that word, insidious. It is so intertwined that it almost like our DNA.

    • @stacielivinthedream8510
      @stacielivinthedream8510 4 дня назад +3

      Also, when we are abused as adults, the shame is present!

    • @karentonks7581
      @karentonks7581 4 дня назад +1

      ​@@Call-Me-Sam OK here Sam. Stay well 🎉❤

    • @Call-Me-Sam
      @Call-Me-Sam  4 дня назад +1

      @@karentonks7581 You too Xx

  • @AmbassadorsOfSorrow
    @AmbassadorsOfSorrow День назад +3

    Dear Sam, as always you just nail it. I can’t thank you enough for all the deep healing work you do with all of us, your tribe. I had to listen about 6 times to this one. So thankful for your existence & your courage X

  • @CoalMiningAlchemist
    @CoalMiningAlchemist 4 дня назад +12

    "It was true then, but it's not now" Ah, Sam...you always hit the nail on the head. Thank you so much and God bless you for you and everything that you do. I so appreciate your videos (whenever you are able to post). ❤

  • @Softtearsofwisdom...
    @Softtearsofwisdom... 4 дня назад +23

    ❄Dear Mr. Sam...You look adorable wrapped in snowflakes. As we are aware they are a special design of water, and we are mostly water - we are all one. Since I was a child I believed snowflakes were kisses from Heaven - holy water in a magical form. Here in the mountains where I live in America, they will visit us this coming Friday, and I am joyfully waiting for their spectacular arrival. I always celebrate the first snowfall with my animals. We enjoy a warm fire from the fireplace that I light just before dawn, and we enjoy treats throughout the day. As the sun bids us farewell, we settle into our cozy, soft, quiet evening. I pray, you too, share our quiet peace and simple joys. You deserve happiness my friend. Blessings. Amen. Xo...

    • @Call-Me-Sam
      @Call-Me-Sam  4 дня назад +9

      What beautiful images you share. Thank you

    • @Romans-ww3bi
      @Romans-ww3bi 3 дня назад

      How very lovely.💖

  • @annmcclure8378
    @annmcclure8378 4 дня назад +18

    Today is my 67th birthday, and this was the first video that came up in my feed, today. It was a gift from God. Praying for healing, and peace, for you, Sam. Thank you.

    • @brigitte9999
      @brigitte9999 4 дня назад +3

      Happy Birthday Ann! I hope your day is lovely. 😊

    • @michellegardiner1424
      @michellegardiner1424 4 дня назад +3

      Happy Birthday😊

    • @Call-Me-Sam
      @Call-Me-Sam  4 дня назад +2

      Happy birthday Ann !

    • @annmcclure8378
      @annmcclure8378 3 дня назад

      @@brigitte9999 Thank you, so much. I'm grateful for each one, and for a nice person like you, to wish me a HB!

  • @ptanji
    @ptanji 4 дня назад +8

    Spot on beautiful! Thank you for this transmission from Wisdom

  • @starz9135
    @starz9135 4 дня назад +17

    love from australia, your always filming in such beautiful locations

  • @drewjones6489
    @drewjones6489 4 дня назад +32

    Thank you for continuing to post Sam. You really have helped me as a young gay man (23) who is still trying to find himself. I found your videos a few years ago when I was 19/20 and taking hormones, thinking that was the route I wanted to go down. Your perspective has been invaluable in helping me realize there are so many unprocessed emotions and so much ego behind my desire to become somebody else. Your vulnerability does not go unappreciated. Hope you are well, hugs from across the pond in California

    • @Call-Me-Sam
      @Call-Me-Sam  4 дня назад +7

      Hi Drew. Yes, I remember you very well. You're doing great. Just be you, no mask required !
      Thanks for my hug, back atcha !

  • @bridgeth.3903
    @bridgeth.3903 4 дня назад +24

    Such a powerful message today. Deep, heavy, dark, and yet so needed and so enlightening…full of healing and hope. Thank you Sam for this one. Truly. Thank you.❤❤❤❤❤❤

  • @RIPLEYTHEBAND
    @RIPLEYTHEBAND 4 дня назад +14

    Thank you for this video, Sam! I always look forward to them, and seeing you. I appreciate you taking the time to make them and how you share your vulnerability. You are giving us incredible lessons. You are beautiful.

    • @Call-Me-Sam
      @Call-Me-Sam  4 дня назад +3

      Bless you. Thank you Ripley.

  • @howmor504
    @howmor504 4 дня назад +7

    Hating ourselves and withdrawaling from the abuse that happened in our childhood only causes more rukus in our lives. Because since we're withdrawn from all the pain that will then suck us into toxic relationships, toxic work environments, and even toxic lifestyle habits. It's better to process the pain acknowledging it happened. Grieve, of course. And allow/pray for our timelines to shift into something new and abundant.
    Btw Sam I love the snow in the background looks so beautiful! 😍

  • @karenblack4702
    @karenblack4702 4 дня назад +10

    This is concise n so comforting, how lovely . Wot a wonderful message , thankyou Sam! You are really somethi ! X ❤

  • @MrSpudguncat
    @MrSpudguncat 4 дня назад +9

    I'm 6'3 n impressive to look at and I know this. There's a young boy inside the frame who's tired of holding it all upright n looking strong. I never realised I'd grown up (50 next year), that bit just passed me by. You're right it's now and time to relax, the only thing I was afraid of was being me n I like me now.
    Thanks Sam I needed that, oh n your voice has relaxed into your chest, it gave those words more weight ❤

    • @Call-Me-Sam
      @Call-Me-Sam  4 дня назад +5

      Thank you. 50s are it ! time to surrender, let go and just be who we are, no mask, no effort other than to be truthful........ and that can be painful.
      Take care

  • @Soundvermont
    @Soundvermont 3 дня назад +4

    shame and guilt and I think shame is deeper but I always liked what you said in another video that, what if we don't strive for the never ending heal it and everything will be ok. You are a gift to everyone here and I'm so thankful.

  • @Metaphysical_Cowboy
    @Metaphysical_Cowboy 2 дня назад +2

    Loved it "what dies is fear"

  • @sunshine-qk8qe
    @sunshine-qk8qe 4 дня назад +9

    Thank you for braving the cold icy weather to make this video which helps so many of us . When you stood silent for a few seconds with the snow falling on your face , and standing all alone , in that landscape I burst out crying. Take care love from West Yorkshire

    • @Call-Me-Sam
      @Call-Me-Sam  4 дня назад +4

      Thank you. Solitude is not the same as isolation. I feel peace. I hope you are well too.

    • @suehamblin9652
      @suehamblin9652 4 дня назад +1

      @@Call-Me-Sam “Solitude is not the same as isolation.” I never thought of it that way. Wisdom for today. Thank you Sam. You are a rare gem.

  • @iymspartacus7089
    @iymspartacus7089 4 дня назад +5

    There’s a level of shame that leads me to lie to others, to protect myself from rejection or predation. It’s typically a conscious choice and I’m at least partially aware of the limitations it puts on relationships when I withhold parts of myself and/or present a false image.
    But you’ve brought my attention to a deeper level of shame, where I lie to myself about core issues of who I am and who I can be. This is predominantly subconscious, and necessarily so it would seem. I’ve gone on cluelessly sabotaging my own life and imprisoning my true self in a false self image and then wondered why I feel so unfulfilled and desperate.
    It takes courage to face reality and let go of the self-deceptions, courage that I often lack. Thank you for your continued encouragement and example, and for exposing me to truths that set me free.

    • @Call-Me-Sam
      @Call-Me-Sam  4 дня назад +2

      This is the truthfulness of clear seeing from which there is no hiding. Essential to bring us to humility.
      Thank you

  • @user-zy8gk2nn7d
    @user-zy8gk2nn7d 3 дня назад +2

    this shame and dsigust towards ourselves is just a projections of our "parents-abusers" - who put the evil they had in themselves into an innocent child, so that the child accepts it and feels it as their own, and abuser doe not have to feel it and can enjoy abuse. They played our gods but they are just nothing right now - just a dust.

  • @PhoenixFeathers
    @PhoenixFeathers 4 дня назад +8

    Love from the Netherlands. I love your clarity vlogs. The light flowing through you is seen. 🌟

  • @jamesfrearson9630
    @jamesfrearson9630 4 дня назад +2

    So beautiful in bravery Sam, thanks. Peace.

  • @michellegardiner1424
    @michellegardiner1424 4 дня назад +1

    Gosh, I am so terrified. This video went straight to the heart. A remedy for the errors that sneak about my being and fool me into hiding.
    Thank-you for finding ever new ways to urge us to stop surviving and to stop healing when healing means self-rejection.

    • @Call-Me-Sam
      @Call-Me-Sam  4 дня назад

      " stop healing when healing means self-rejection." Yes, you put it very clearly here, thank you Michelle.
      I feel it too, that terror but less so now. I'm more scared of not living, we have so little time , lets not not waste it hiding away.

  • @RickyRICORicardo
    @RickyRICORicardo 3 дня назад +1

    Thank you, Sam. 🤗❤

  • @ritadavison4857
    @ritadavison4857 3 дня назад +1

    Sending you a big ole hug, Sam! ❤

  • @marcmonzo
    @marcmonzo 4 дня назад +1

    Thank you Sam.

  • @darkkstar5647
    @darkkstar5647 4 дня назад +2

    I think your vids contain so much clarity, every one. But I often write out my thoughts or journal them to try and figure out what I think and be able to express myself with clarity. I always feel heartened by your words and love seeing the landscape you live in.

    • @Call-Me-Sam
      @Call-Me-Sam  4 дня назад

      Thats a good practice, thats really what I'm doing in these videos. After they are published I watch them a few times just to understand what I've said .
      Try this.... get a pad and pen and timer... write for minimum 20 mins, don't let the pen stop, just keep writing anything . After a few minutes deeper thoughts reveal them selves.

  • @MyaMurrayy
    @MyaMurrayy 4 дня назад

    This almost brought me to tears.. I needed to hear this! Thank you beautiful 💙

  • @melindalemmon2149
    @melindalemmon2149 4 дня назад +1

    Love you, Sir. So proud of you. And so grateful for each insight. Still living with someone's drama and abuse. Why? I keep letting him back in. We both are complex trauma survivors. I have chosen to extend personal peace.

    • @Call-Me-Sam
      @Call-Me-Sam  4 дня назад

      Thank you. Thats a difficult situation. I wish you both peace .

  • @kir4n
    @kir4n 4 дня назад +1

    i randomly came across your video and I'm grateful i came across it.
    I'm a survivor of CSA and i could relate to this video on so many levels.
    I'm a 22 y o guy and I feel ashamed to want to feel loved, to be taken care of, to be seen(everything that i lacked in my childhood) and all the adult things about being the MAN just kind of confuses me and there's this war in my head where I end up feeling like it all ended and I don't have to deal with this bs anymore but
    there is hope and i live every day for that.
    I do forgive myself and I'm trying to show everyone who i really am, not hiding myself anymore. I'm trying.
    thank you

    • @Call-Me-Sam
      @Call-Me-Sam  4 дня назад +2

      I hated myself because I needed to be loved, I was so ashamed and felt so weak but intimacy is foundational to our wellbeing. We want to love and be loved, to give ourselves to others in respectful, nourishing , truthful relationship.... this is where we really discover who we are.
      Don't ever doubt that change is possible, you are here now and now is where change begins .
      Acceptance is essential....... be kind and tolerant and compassionate to yourself.
      The healing path is a journey, not an event.
      Small , gentle change , each day is a victory.
      I wish you well.

    • @kir4n
      @kir4n 4 дня назад

      @Call-Me-Sam i can so relate to you but I've never been intimate probably because I pushed the ones that I felt didn't deserve me or because of how needy I've been for love and care that probably drifted away people and I learnt that i must not be needy and stuff which is confusing but I just know that I deserve love. I'm being compassionate and I'm hopeful.
      Thank you for everything that you're doing! I subscribed and I'm now checking your old videos.

  • @Romans-ww3bi
    @Romans-ww3bi 3 дня назад

    So good to see you and I applaud you for helping me accept my weaknesses and my trauma which happened to be abandonment as a child. It is good to protect myself from thoroughly baring my soul about my wounds and sharing what I'm comfortable sharing. I think you do this, too. Sometimes the trauma resurfaces when I don't expect it, and it helps me to identify it and know where it came from - my childhood and then embrace it as a vulnerability or a sensitive area. Then, if I can distance myself from a new wounding of an old trauma, I feel better. I have honored who I am and where I've come from. I have taken some power back by saying I won't allow a new wounding in my life. This is a victory! I think that you are living out a victory just as I am! God bless you and all of us here with you.

    • @Call-Me-Sam
      @Call-Me-Sam  3 дня назад

      Yes, I only share a little and never talk in way that would be too vulnerable. We need privacy too.
      I still have periods of struggle . Our path is life long but definitely becomes easier as we stop resisting.
      Thanks so much for sharing this .... YES ! Victory ...
      God bless you too.

  • @innermeetme
    @innermeetme 2 дня назад

    This really resonated with me today, and came through as just what I needed to hear. Thanks Sam 😊

    • @Call-Me-Sam
      @Call-Me-Sam  2 дня назад +1

      Lovely . I'm glad this helped

  • @anneplaks4898
    @anneplaks4898 4 дня назад +3

    My heart goes out to the children of Ukraine, if there are any left. Stolen and used for whatever. Sex, organs, adrenochrome. We live in a terrible world. I love you Sam. Thank you for your videos.

    • @Call-Me-Sam
      @Call-Me-Sam  4 дня назад +1

      Thank you. Yes, we do, the horror of this world and those fallen to evil, is quite staggering.

  • @Athanasiospaschos2963
    @Athanasiospaschos2963 4 дня назад +2

    Thank you too Sam

  • @SallyRobertson-h9o
    @SallyRobertson-h9o 2 дня назад

    Thank you so much Sam. I really needed to hear this tonight. I’m not sleeping at all as I had gone into a shame relapse a few hours earlier. Despite my progress I can feel there are parts of myself I’m still not fully accepting. You help give me the courage to embrace those parts. Thank you so kindly for the deep compassion and encouragement you share 🙏

    • @Call-Me-Sam
      @Call-Me-Sam  2 дня назад

      Thank you Sally. Yes, I have gone through periods of intense fear around shame but much, much less so now. Change comes slowly but surely. Acceptance ...... and forgiveness are not events but processes . Gentle progress is the way.

    • @SallyRobertson-h9o
      @SallyRobertson-h9o 2 дня назад

      @@Call-Me-Sam Thank you Sam. That is encouraging. I was really hating myself at times during the night. Just exhausted. But I think often the worst feelings come up just before a meaningful shift. It's not surprising, as the part of myself that is learning self-care is coming up against the destructive part that wants to cling to old patterns. I need to go gently and allow it all to unfold and hold myself through that. Much care and love to you Sam for your courage and support to others 🙏💖

    • @Call-Me-Sam
      @Call-Me-Sam  2 дня назад

      @@SallyRobertson-h9o Me too ! night time can be a difficult, lonely place, no diversions but our thoughts. " But I think often the worst feelings come up just before a meaningful shift." Definitely !
      Much love to you too Sally. Before I sleep tonight , I shall hold you in my prayers.

    • @SallyRobertson-h9o
      @SallyRobertson-h9o День назад

      @@Call-Me-Sam Thank you so kindly Sam. I will hold you in my prayers too.

  • @Romans-ww3bi
    @Romans-ww3bi 3 дня назад

    P. S. I got to see your smile begin and hear a bit of a laugh. Sam, you are a delightful, insightful gift. (I am in the state of Minnesota where snow will also be coming quite soon.)

  • @joen4642
    @joen4642 3 дня назад

    Thank you Sam 💜
    I've started practicing being greatful. Like really feeling it not just telling myself I know I'm greatful but actually taking a moment to feel it.. I'm trying to make a ritual out of it. It feels like a shift.
    Hope you are doing well!

    • @Call-Me-Sam
      @Call-Me-Sam  3 дня назад

      Hi Joen, thats a greta practice, it is so impossibly, improbably, mysteriously , incredible to actually be a thunking , feeling being.... a person ! I am definitely grateful for the experience .
      I am well, thank you. I hope you are too. 😊

  • @fionabattrum7395
    @fionabattrum7395 9 часов назад

    Thank you Sam 🙏

  • @Sashas-mom
    @Sashas-mom 4 дня назад

    You just amaze me. This was needed. So much love to you kind gentle one.

  • @adhhxgxhhg
    @adhhxgxhhg 4 дня назад +2

    I have a strange relationship with the snow. I was born in Rockford Illinois and it would snow heavily but then I moved to the south in Chattanooga and on the day it does snow it never sticks. I have oddly comforting memories of the snow, of disassociating looking out the window, or at night with the streetlight behind me looking into the space where the snow faded into darkness in the distance. In a way I felt more present then, without thought, just viewing. It is ironic because I remember as a small child trying to run away from the fighting inside my home but only staying around the neighborhood watching the snow and my breath in the air. I hope I can go on a vacation for once and see the snow and the ocean someday, maybe I should remember that to motivate myself.
    I believe I have already told you this but I think it is worth repeating considering how uncanny it feels to me, the way what you say connects to were I am mentally right now. As a small aside let me say thank you for not only continuing to make these beautiful videos but for the genuine feeling that goes into them, many will see it as a transactional opportunity, rarely if ever do I see someone purely trying to express themselves, for the sake of it, for the sake of others like minded.
    I am glad I found you and gave you my time, it is some of the only time I have spent watching videos that does not feel like a waste of my time, a distraction to feel guilt over. I have and continue to distract myself, but it doesn't work like it used to, for better or worse.
    I have wanted to speak with you for weeks now, I feel unworthy to, like I have not done enough or changed enough to speak with you, I have felt too empty and easily distracted to take your time. I have found myself after a lot of progress hitting a wall in my loneliness, like a caged animal that stays in it's cage even after the door is opened. I have faced the traumas of my past more and more but still find myself frozen, still hiding in my cage, only looking at the outline of the door. It is hard for me to believe in my belonging outside of what I know.
    I find it hard to say these negative things to you because you have responded to my comments before and said truths that I deeply value but I have still not fully explored in action, but you have helped me a great deal, I watch and rewatch your videos very frequently and they give me a sense of presence, solace and clarity. I understand entirely the physical manifestations of clear seeing. I frequently find myself struggling to walk down stairs because of how shaky my legs get with fright, at my therapy sessions I have to hop down the stairs even though I am a man without any condition that impares my movement. There is a constant state of anxiety that comes with these realizations, it is not the same anxiety as usual though, it does feel like a shedding of that feeling, something new even if it is uncomfortable.
    After it all though I find myself inactive and to a lesser extent distracting myself and I feel guilt over that. I do not know if I know how to move forward, I do not know if I even really feel like moving forward, I feel ungrateful and stuck with myself in my own way.
    Wrestling with the negativity of myself is exhausting, I had no idea how cruel I was to myself until a few weeks ago and it made me weep when I realized it. There have been many realizations of how this crulelty has shaped my thoughts and sense of self. Ways of speaking and thoughts I would never even begin to think about others, that I would be angry to hear someone say a small part of to a stranger.
    I don't know if there is any coherence in watch I have just typed but after many deleted drafts of messages I am going to be selfish and post this.
    I truly value your time and insight, Sam. My life has more clarity because of you, I can't hurt and distract myself like I used to anymore. I will be watching this video in particular for comfort and clarity, I understand the gravity of what you say but all of it is still left to be internalized, I feel like I am still grieving. I love you Sam, thank you. - Eric G.
    Also please do not feel obligated to respond I do not want to be dead weight on your conscious. I value you time and your peace of mind, it is genuinely comforting just to see you living more fully and to be able to type this to you, that is more than enough for me. I still have a lot to learn.

    • @Call-Me-Sam
      @Call-Me-Sam  4 дня назад +4

      Eric, bless you for taking the time to write these honest words. The images you shared very much reflect my own experience, not just from childhood but also the isolation and fear of the boy grown into a man.
      Not very long ago, I still felt almost exactly as you wrote above.
      The path out of the darkness is initiated by us, it is a painful process to truly grieve but that grief is the validation and expression of the sorrow and loss , still held within you.
      Feel free to reach out and we can talk more privately.
      On the path, I may only be a few footsteps ahead of you, but thats a good thing, I can turn and reach out my hand.

    • @adhhxgxhhg
      @adhhxgxhhg 4 дня назад +1

      @Call-Me-Sam Thank you Sam. I am glad I finally sent one of these messages.
      I am going to make a deal with myself to go to the park in the trails of the forest and I will get in touch with you outside of the comment section.
      I went to the trails a week or so ago and saw the braken turning colors and thought of you then in your peace in the highlands.
      Thank you again, I hope to speak with you soon.

    • @Call-Me-Sam
      @Call-Me-Sam  4 дня назад

      Lost
      Stand still. The trees ahead and bushes beside you
      Are not lost. Wherever you are is called Here,
      And you must treat it as a powerful stranger,
      Must ask permission to know it and be known.
      The forest breathes. Listen. It answers,
      I have made this place around you.
      If you leave it, you may come back again, saying Here.
      No two trees are the same to Raven.
      No two branches are the same to Wren.
      If what a tree or a bush does is lost on you,
      You are surely lost. Stand still. The forest knows
      Where you are. You must let it find you.
      -- David Wagoner

    • @Pilgrim-y6k
      @Pilgrim-y6k 4 дня назад

      Eric, my heart goes out to you. It is not easy, nor a straight-line, to come free of things that shaped us as children and still control us. We take 1 step forward and can take 2 back. That doesn't mean that nothing is happening in us. It is just that it takes time and great energy to shed the things we took on as children. Keep going, with grace for yourself in the process. As Sam would say, you are enough!

  • @debrapaulino918
    @debrapaulino918 3 дня назад

    Every time ive listened ive been touched in my spirit 💨🤍💦

  • @margett__
    @margett__ 3 дня назад

    Sam! As someone not particularly spiritual, I’ve got no other explanation for your today’s video but the one resembling what spiritual people would probably say. I mean, that we’re all interconnected and a part of the same greater collective. I’m stuck and have been for a couple of months. Shame is at the forefront, as usual. I’m very exhausted. Yesterday, when in the throes of it, I wished for something outside of me to show its face. I needed a break from myself and to connect with something that is not constant shame, anger or disappointment. You showed your face, as open and honest as ever. And with the message that is on point and targets the very heart of what I’m going through. Your short video has cracked the shell I’ve been hiding in over the weeks and brought a necessary dose of good tears to me. Thank you for that!

    • @Call-Me-Sam
      @Call-Me-Sam  3 дня назад

      This is good to hear. I am very happy that this video helped. Be kind to yourself Margett, gentleness and tolerance for our wounded self, be the space in which the inner unfoldment allows the falling away of the protective outer self . Then the light within that has always been there can really be seen.

  • @michellescalia2142
    @michellescalia2142 3 дня назад

    ❤️ A million times!

  • @rickyblythe4951
    @rickyblythe4951 2 дня назад

    You have helped me so much. I am letting go of the hate.

    • @Call-Me-Sam
      @Call-Me-Sam  2 дня назад

      AWESOME ! gently, self kindness and compassion, bring yourself into the present , without contriving a performance .......... YOU ARE ENOUGH . Nothing to hate .

  • @malgorzatabilna-vb4kf
    @malgorzatabilna-vb4kf 3 дня назад

    hello Sam,
    I want to let you know, that you are helping yet another person. I translate litlle by little your videos an send them to my sister. She actually wants to read them and said they are helpful for her and that is something, because she is 60 now, 4 years older, than me and NEVER agrread to any therapy, or drugs. She was always like concrete. So you are miracle maker. Sending love❤️and waiting impatiently for more. Keep warm, don’t catch a cold:)

    • @malgorzatabilna-vb4kf
      @malgorzatabilna-vb4kf 3 дня назад

      ❤️

    • @Call-Me-Sam
      @Call-Me-Sam  3 дня назад

      Thank you for letting me know. I can't claim anything but being willing to see and understand. Everything is revealed as self is brought into balance.
      Nothing I do , I do alone. I am guided and supported by you and those that find value here.
      I shall keep digging deep and doing my best to be of use .

    • @malgorzatabilna-vb4kf
      @malgorzatabilna-vb4kf 3 дня назад

      I’m happy to hear that along with everybody on this channel and all those, who are yet to know you.
      PS. it’ such fun to talk to you in real time , exchange these lines:)Huge hugs!

    • @Call-Me-Sam
      @Call-Me-Sam  3 дня назад

      @@malgorzatabilna-vb4kf Thank you very much for my HUG x

  • @MerrilSake-d4e
    @MerrilSake-d4e 4 дня назад

    Thank you for making this.

  • @Reet64
    @Reet64 4 дня назад

    Always appreciate your thoughtful videos.

  • @BlindFaith111
    @BlindFaith111 4 дня назад +2

    ❤❤❤

  • @Lotusblue234
    @Lotusblue234 3 дня назад

    "See the prison of your own certainty"
    That line goes so hard. Applies to so many things in life. There are zome people close to me who suffer a lot due to their own certainy. I wish I could make them see the wisdom in those words.

    • @Call-Me-Sam
      @Call-Me-Sam  3 дня назад

      Certainty is a coping mechanism. But oh! how much pain it causes. We have to reach our own point of exhaustion and let go.

  • @Bubble-Mix-96
    @Bubble-Mix-96 4 дня назад

    Your new videos often seem to pop up at the right time for me 🙏

  • @lauriegills773
    @lauriegills773 20 часов назад

    Think it’s impossible to be 100% of our authentic being as adults.
    Great conversation. Stay warm. 🙏🏻

    • @Call-Me-Sam
      @Call-Me-Sam  12 часов назад +1

      Agreed.... we feel doubt and insecurities but with age can learn to settle into our flaws and just let go.

    • @lauriegills773
      @lauriegills773 8 часов назад

      @ easier said than done☺️

    • @Call-Me-Sam
      @Call-Me-Sam  7 часов назад

      @@lauriegills773 work in progress 😊

  • @Lindasmusings
    @Lindasmusings 4 дня назад +3

    Love love Sam🫶🏻💙💙✨

  • @cyrillllll
    @cyrillllll 4 дня назад +3

  • @thomasdagley
    @thomasdagley 3 дня назад

    It takes all of us saying what we can to shed a light on this. If we can better understand shame, we may be able to truly heal as a people and civilization. Thank you Saun. This poetry is important as the greatest physics

    • @Call-Me-Sam
      @Call-Me-Sam  3 дня назад

      These are wise and compassionate words, thank you Thomas

  • @turquoisetoile-universalethics
    @turquoisetoile-universalethics 4 дня назад

    I have been learning that for the past year. Our brains are continually reminding us and telling us to stay alert in case someone is about to hurt us or something is about to happen. It can also immobilize us.

  • @scoopup2349
    @scoopup2349 4 дня назад

    The stark scene of the snow is the perfect imagery for this subject matter today. We can place controls and brakes on our lives, thinking this is settling us free from the pain of the original abuse. We can end up bound, in even further emotional austerity. If it's not setting you free, then it's not the truth! Thank you this video.

  • @ashleyjohnston2710
    @ashleyjohnston2710 4 дня назад

    Thank you!

  • @OllieT123
    @OllieT123 4 дня назад +2

    Scotland has received snow before Ontario, Canada. :)

    • @markperry5417
      @markperry5417 3 дня назад +1

      Brave brave man. U looked beyond that void. U looked into it, fearing there would be nothing there left worth seeing. But u found a man where a boy once stood. So hold urself, smile, and sleep the sleep of the proven warrior u truly are. Respect Sam.

    • @Call-Me-Sam
      @Call-Me-Sam  3 дня назад +2

      How beautifully poetic, thank you Mark

  • @terryfrancis10
    @terryfrancis10 День назад

    Thank you Heart Friend. Does is go away or do we just get more aware of it?
    You're right everything has a purpose or it wouldn't last and shame makes us withdraw so maybe that's it's usefulness.
    It's in the chest by the Heart that retracts, implodes on itself, an inner hugging?
    Nighttime is hardest in the dark - panic that everything is falling apart and we are powerless but we are not... peace to us all, ty.

    • @Call-Me-Sam
      @Call-Me-Sam  День назад +1

      Shame does go away, as we truly accept our own innocence.

    • @terryfrancis10
      @terryfrancis10 День назад

      @@Call-Me-Sam yes

  • @Here-a-little-there-a-little
    @Here-a-little-there-a-little 3 дня назад

    Thank you Sam!! Now go sit by the fire!!!

  • @Gail-ux2ly
    @Gail-ux2ly 3 дня назад +1

    Putting out a video each week is not and should not be the goal here. I come to the channel for the thoughtful wisdom you express. If these lessons in humanity come in daily, weekly, monthly, or annual doses, that is ok. The lesson is the draw, not the frequency.

  • @johnbarnas879
    @johnbarnas879 4 дня назад

    Love others as you love yourself.

  • @samlloyd3644
    @samlloyd3644 4 дня назад

    thanks sam

  • @markobrien4332
    @markobrien4332 4 дня назад

    Thank you Sam, "they come when they come".

  • @M-i-k-a-e-l
    @M-i-k-a-e-l 4 дня назад

    Sam, you are a rare voice out there. I find most voices out there more or less intolerable. But you are real to the bone and beyond. Even if you would never record any more videos, know that you have really reached people's hearts.

    • @Call-Me-Sam
      @Call-Me-Sam  4 дня назад +1

      Thank you so much . I know how bad isolation can be, trapped with our trauma. No matter the nature of the trauma, we share a language. I just want to speak in a voice that the wounded understand, to know that they are not alone and change is possible. I am one of them.
      Over the last few years I've just let go of the outer self. Revealing something else.

    • @charlottetaylor4471
      @charlottetaylor4471 3 дня назад

      I'm incredibly aware that I isolate and that I'm in freeze mode, but I can't stand being around most other people either these days (it's gotten worse since I started learning about all this.)

    • @Call-Me-Sam
      @Call-Me-Sam  3 дня назад +1

      @@charlottetaylor4471 I think that as we do become aware, we begin to become aware of our mask, we also see it in others. We need truthful presence, not just for us to heal but in relationships too.
      People wear masks, sometimes we just have to be tolerant of this.
      This is why truthful , honest relationships are just so important for us to heal. In those relationships we can meaningfully connect.
      Over the last few years my tolerance for superficiality was extremely low but as I've become much more stable I'm able to be around others. It can be draining though.
      " find the others " as the saying goes., others that are real !

    • @M-i-k-a-e-l
      @M-i-k-a-e-l 3 дня назад

      @@Call-Me-Sam Yes, may this language we share serve us well on our pilgrimage to the Unnameable One.

    • @M-i-k-a-e-l
      @M-i-k-a-e-l 3 дня назад

      @@charlottetaylor4471 Hi friend, yes, things can be intensified and seemingly "worse" on this path. It is easy to judge these periods as being actually worse. But seldom do we know. We can establish certain trustable contacts over time who can give us valuable reality checks here and there. I've heard one of the more serious trauma teachers out there recommending us to 'connect' with safe and inspiring people in literature and movies if real life encounters is too much for the moment. I recommend you find the long video Sam did reading poetry. Just amazing. Best regards to you.

  • @tmking7483
    @tmking7483 2 дня назад

    Our environment matters.
    In North America now is moving into authoritarianism. Being myself is a everyday rejection for my whole life - everyday I heal cause everyday I'm rejected _ cause I was raised by psychopaths. The heads up - psychopaths hate authenticity.

  • @tmking7483
    @tmking7483 2 дня назад

    FFFFF
    Our survival states
    Fight ( for the Gladiator)
    Flee ( for the strategist)
    Freeze ( for our children)
    Fawn ( for a women teacher cook)
    FU octopus (scapegoat with weapons welded on)
    Terri is the Ferry Ready
    Is the Lighthouse on the Ferry
    Almost _ Sam is mailing nailing it to the barge

  • @lochieb3640
    @lochieb3640 2 дня назад

    Thank you. My body contracts so much It doesn't feel like the shame will resolve I'm so exhausted. 🙏
    Loving myself, holding myself also triggers the shame and disgust really strong so most the time It hurts too much to make it feel worthwhile. Is that normal?

    • @Call-Me-Sam
      @Call-Me-Sam  2 дня назад +1

      I wish I hadn't said " love yourself'. Its so abstract .. WTF dies it even mean ? The transformation all starts with being kind to our self . We absolutely must be gentle and kind to our self when we repeat patterns that are expressions of how scared we are and how wounded we are.
      If we do not treat our self with kindness , we are just repeating the cycle of abuse and rejection.
      Be patient..... Be gentle ....... Be compassionate to self.
      Self is a refuge and we need to gradually teach that part of us that it doesn't need to keep holding on to the same patterns.
      Over time , we can learn a new way of being.
      In this kindness, self becomes more porous and the light, sheltered within us since childhood, begins to shine....how we make our self available changes, we can been felt and seen in a different way......
      These interior changes , transform the outer reality of our lives in a very real way.

    • @lochieb3640
      @lochieb3640 2 дня назад

      @@Call-Me-Sam So grateful for your reply Sam, so so helpful as are your videos. Sorry for pushing the question on you, I've been through another round of rough day
      ights and reached that limit to cope with it all once again. I end up just mentally attacking myself repeatedly and spiral into despair, fear and unbearable self hatred.
      I've been holding myself tonight and not forcing myself into love, just being gentle as you say and even saying sorry for abandoning myself for all those years, it's been easing the pain so much more than normal. Ty again for this channel and your ability to speak from the heart so powerfully :)

    • @Call-Me-Sam
      @Call-Me-Sam  2 дня назад +1

      Thank you. I understand that feeling of intense frustration and hatred... that became so intense for me that I broke.
      It can't go on forever. Imagine the child you were standing in front of you, how would you speak to that child. I'm quite sure you wouldn't attack them .... you would hold them and love them and want them to feel anything but self hate.
      Thats what I'm talking about when I say , be the kindness for yourself.

  • @goodtoseeyou
    @goodtoseeyou 3 дня назад

    Yay! Call Me Sam!

  • @miscelany2
    @miscelany2 4 дня назад +3

  • @bobbysgirl8365
    @bobbysgirl8365 4 дня назад

    I was SA by my mother , tortured by the siblings and gang r#ped throughout my childhood by them. I have DID , its horrible. I am completely alone nobody for years no therapy as can't get any. I applied to Dignitas but they said no. I am trying another euthanasia place now. Too late for me.

    • @Call-Me-Sam
      @Call-Me-Sam  3 дня назад

      I'm so sorry for what you have experienced. Finding a counsellor or therapist who truly understands the darkness and isolation of what you have been through is essential. Keep trying to find someone to speak with .
      Don't give up just yet. You've made it this far and cannot know what will happen tomorrow.
      It's never too late .

  • @KerilynDesiree
    @KerilynDesiree 2 дня назад

    Hi Sam ❤

  • @nathat4250
    @nathat4250 4 дня назад

    Came for #detransition awareness
    Stayed for the philosophy

  • @einericklon8486
    @einericklon8486 4 дня назад

    ❄🙏💚

  • @LesleyAnnPrettyBeads
    @LesleyAnnPrettyBeads 4 дня назад

    Hi Sam! 👋 👋

  • @tmking7483
    @tmking7483 2 дня назад

    Psychopaths on the loose
    Yes it's true - it's true now

  • @tmking7483
    @tmking7483 2 дня назад

    All I did to survive was be a 🌵

  • @godislove8740
    @godislove8740 4 дня назад +2

    hey Sam.

  • @markobrien4332
    @markobrien4332 4 дня назад

    Who the hell do we think we are? lol! 😔😕😁😂🤣😀

  • @angeladowden4535
    @angeladowden4535 3 дня назад

    Wow.. thankyou, Sam. Beautiful message in a stunning winter wonderland.
    It's interesting to see the seasons of change, both in your surroundings & in yourself, as you grow & change.
    The seasons are a constant reminder that nothing stays the same & we can grow beyond hating parts of ourself that were once disgusting & shameful to us.🎯🙏🙂🩷

    • @Call-Me-Sam
      @Call-Me-Sam  3 дня назад +2

      An important and beautiful insight. Thank you Angela.

    • @angeladowden4535
      @angeladowden4535 3 дня назад +1

      @Call-Me-Sam
      My pleasure, Sam. I'm glad it resonated.🙏🩷

  • @Bfree444
    @Bfree444 15 часов назад

    It's the process the caterpillar goes through to become a butterfly...imagine the letting go and the surrender that it went thru to become that beauty...surrender is death....it's life....Jesus said. You have to die to live... because non of us are alive til we reach out authentic self...rid the mask...there are no two people alike...their is no such thing as death...it's a transformation of energy..I know...I surrendered one day to discover there is something much greater on the other side....I simply stepped over an imaginary line from illusion to reality ..there is a God...we are never alone....all we have to do is teach out and ask God if he's real....and trust me... he'll prove it...Jeremiah 33:3....that 333 haunted me for a year... followed me every where I went....so, I now believe it was Jeremiah 33:3....cause I needed proof....spirit told me that the goal is to save ourselves from our self....that self that reminds you of all the old stuff we drag around in the suitcase that we no longer need to carry...it becomes too heavy and burdensome...it's full of lies we tell our self....it keeps getting heavier and heavier...it's time to stop taking it with us and leave it outside the train and get onboard to our new life....Blessings dear one 🙏❤️🙏

  • @brendaroy89
    @brendaroy89 3 дня назад +1

    ❤❤❤

  • @stellacornejo4307
    @stellacornejo4307 4 дня назад +2