Building TRUST is the way toward loving “intimacy”. That takes, time, honesty, patience and even the self-control about not putting “expectations” out there. Asking a husband, “how do YOU WANT to love me?” And then encouraging him to lead in that way, “receiving” with acceptance and appreciation. We need to change our language from having “sex” to being “loving”. Yes…Be Jesus to your mate. When we are rude in our refusal, we can destroy the trust we are trying to build. Enjoyment of His gift of trust and intimacy blesses God. Someone MUST BEGIN, by laying down YOUR expectations, as the wife. Saying to your husband, “i want to be your “lover” and your “friend”. How would you want to ‘love” me, right now?”
I’ll be married 33 years this May! We’ve been together over 34! Our sex used to be very intimate! She used to show me affection any time ! I need that ! I need affection! I miss her showing that intimacy! Thank you 🙏
Remember that showing affection and sex are not the same. I'd encourage you to consider Why. Look at the relationship issues, and talk with your wife about that - not focused on getting sex, but on building what needs to be repaired in the emotional connection between you.
It is also, very important, NOT to share your intimate “moments” with anyone else, and to protect the trust that you are building together. No girl-friend “gab’ about your “best friend”, your husband.
All too often women get married to someone who isn't their "first choice" and they aren't attracted to, but he does fit the bill of a good provider, attentive and caring. Then the intimacy and sex isnt there because she was never attracted to him in the first place. Queue all these "problems" that would never present themselves if the woman was attracted to the man she married. Have a man on who has suffered through a marriage with no intimacy or sex for a few decades and try to have this conversation with him. If he really let's his emotions go (which he probably won't), very little of this message will solve anything.
Building TRUST is the way toward loving “intimacy”. That takes, time, honesty, patience and even the self-control about not putting “expectations” out there. Asking a husband, “how do YOU WANT to love me?” And then encouraging him to lead in that way, “receiving” with acceptance and appreciation. We need to change our language from having “sex” to being “loving”. Yes…Be Jesus to your mate. When we are rude in our refusal, we can destroy the trust we are trying to build. Enjoyment of His gift of trust and intimacy blesses God. Someone MUST BEGIN, by laying down YOUR expectations, as the wife. Saying to your husband, “i want to be your “lover” and your “friend”. How would you want to ‘love” me, right now?”
I’ll be married 33 years this May! We’ve been together over 34! Our sex used to be very intimate! She used to show me affection any time ! I need that ! I need affection! I miss her showing that intimacy! Thank you 🙏
Remember that showing affection and sex are not the same. I'd encourage you to consider Why. Look at the relationship issues, and talk with your wife about that - not focused on getting sex, but on building what needs to be repaired in the emotional connection between you.
It is also, very important, NOT to share your intimate “moments” with anyone else, and to protect the trust that you are building together. No girl-friend “gab’ about your “best friend”, your husband.
Thanks, it was really helpful and encouraging
Awesome wisdom. This is great content. Thank you
You improve your sex life when your partner wants nothing to with being intimate. Hard to change things alone.
We were Christian! I used to be close with god! At age of 46! I lost my vision! I’m left with limited prefer! No they said it won’t come back!
All too often women get married to someone who isn't their "first choice" and they aren't attracted to, but he does fit the bill of a good provider, attentive and caring. Then the intimacy and sex isnt there because she was never attracted to him in the first place. Queue all these "problems" that would never present themselves if the woman was attracted to the man she married.
Have a man on who has suffered through a marriage with no intimacy or sex for a few decades and try to have this conversation with him. If he really let's his emotions go (which he probably won't), very little of this message will solve anything.
Infertility does changes things. Thanks
You lost me at pillars. This is so complicated, I can't follow it. It's not for me, sorry.
So good
Thank you.
Glad this was helpful.
Can you talk about sex use for power?