@@toltekrecords Ties in with the problem of pathologization. Being NT means there's nothing DIAGNOSABLY different and/or wrong, but diagnosis or lack thereof clearly does not say much about someone's happiness or ability to navigate society.
When I found out why I have never been able to be accepted by NT's, and how I would need to give up honesty and other things we cherish to be like them, I lost interest in being in their "club." I wish I had some autistic friends offline to have a coffee and a chat with, though.
@@raven4090 You can look it up online. Just google Meetup. But here in AZ we have autism places that also have group meetings. I got the info. from the people who diagnosed me.
It’s also partially because almost every single person with autism that I meet has very specific interests, whereas most people need many, many different talking points to stimulate them over the course of a long conversation. I also feel that people with autism generally are not that interested in truly hearing what I have to say on an emotional level, because that type of thinking requires too much nuance for them. It’s also because people with autism can become overbearing. That being said, there is nothing inherently wrong with any of that, except for low emotional intelligence. There is great value in people with autism, and obviously it would be better if society was shaped more naturally and not around a rat race for money, so that people who are neurodivergent would find their place of value.
@@lukekiefer5964 You haven't met me. I have many interests, can adapt to changes in subjects when I talk to people, and have high emotional intelligence. The saying is true: "When you've met one autistic person, you've met ONE autistic person." NT's generally just don't like us for reasons that aren't good excuses to not like someone.
I don't regret who I've become and am quite happy being autistic; I just regret not learning sooner that there are people and places I have to avoid. Being cast out by a society that hates differences means absolute freedom.
I've been growing up suppressing down anxiety from my experiences with miscommunication since school as an undiagnosed human being with "minor" autism. I can't fathom myself being content with life without worry about the constant feeling of social disconnect whenever I have to speak to someone. I love pets, but they simply remind me that I'm comfortable with them, but not with people, which only lowers my mood.
@@rachel_espinoza It's freedom because you don't have to live by someone elses expectations. Too many people follow along because they're so worried about what others think of them. You can take care of your responsibilies and reach your goals without anyone distracting you.
@@andrewmatthews6263depends on the form. Its a spectrum and really what it is is indeprendent or novel neural development. You dont need to be autistic to be bad at any of those, just as you dont always need to be neurotypical to have a deeper view or idea of something. Autism is where independent development or "nature" overcomes societally infouenced development or "nurture"
@@andrewmatthews6263 yes by neurotypical societal standards, in a world that isn't built to accommodate us, that's the point of the video. If autistics could set the rules for functioning, problem solving skills and strategies and thought processes they'd blow everyone else out of the water in terms of performance.
@@andrewmatthews6263 being forced to behave and do things you're just not good at or can't handle or comprehend, can appear like a problem from the outside when really it's a different process that produces a different result, and has different requirements to function
What i've learned, by studying them after a forced hyperfixation on the way they are because I used to think I was wrong, is that neurotypical people project their insecurities and deficiencies onto us.
My grandfather was autistic, he was also an aeronautical engineer and served in the Air Force as a high ranking officer for 30 years and serving in Vietnam and the Korean War, worked for the NSA and then a rocket propulsion company before retiring. An amazing man.
Most neurotypical people arent ready to be unplugged but if you're autistic you’ve never been fully plugged in. THIS. I FEEL. SO UNDERSTOOD. Also, the weird serendipity of me wondering if i live in a matrix then unrelatedly finding this video when looking for autism content .
Right?! I've been tricked into believing that fitting in is what I wanted on several occasions. Since people are generally passive, with some effort it's generally not too difficult. Just painfully boring. Eventually my brain may be responsible for socially sabotaging me, but that shouldn't imply it's not a welcomed relief.
I've been clean now 1yr now from decades of hardcore drug addiction but now I don't feel I fit in the world and I had an experience with christ that's how I eventually stopped drugs but I wasn't brought up in the church but I've been forcing myself to Go to church as the bible commands it I feel so anxious and out of place as the sermon ends and every gets a cuppa I end up being stressed to death about interacting with others I think it would be easier if there was other people there who's been thru a living hell of drug addiction I'd feel more at easy but there doesn't seam to behonestly it getting me so down bcos now I'm not in a relaxed state as I used to me on either valium,,heroin, methadone now I'm stone cold sober but I'm so fxxking stressed out.
@@leetlbt Just remember everyone who goes to church knows they're a sinner. "All have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God." Their struggle is no different from yours, you're both resisting the temptation of sin. Don't feel isolated, you're in the same boat and you have the same savior. I'm glad you were able to come to christ and escape your addiction, remember that Jesus loves you. Praise God.
Neurotypical syndrome is a neurological disorder characterised by preoccupation of social concerns, delusions of superiority, and obsessions of conformity. Neurotypical individuals often assume their experience of the world is either the only one, or the only correct one. NTs find it difficult to be alone. NTs are often intolerant of minor differences in others. When in groups NTs are socially and behaviourally ridgid, and frequently insist upon the performance of dysfunctional, destructive and even impossible rituals to maintain group identity. NTs find it difficult to communicate directly, and have a much higher incidence of lying, as compared to someone without NT. Neurotypical disorder is considered to be genetic in origin, brain autopsys have shown the NTs brain is typically smaller than non-NTs, and may have over developed areas related to social behaviour.
The comment about the "lack of empathy" claim reminded me of an ex, who for most of the years together would consistently sing praises for how in touch I am with my emotions and my openness with them...but then also would in private sometimes refer to me as a robot, increasing more and more as our relationship struggled more and more. It has always baffled me how willing some neurotypical people are to de-person even those who they purported to love, as soon as any clashing happens, regardless of the subject of the clash. I really hope we can build a world in which future generations aren't subjected to this devaluing, and often dehumanizing, that our current systems inflict on autistic and other neurodivergent folks.
Yea... I'm autistic and hyper-empathic. We can have difference in empathy both ways, we aren't sociopaths and I'm still confused as to why do many neurotypicals think that... Maybe it's not us who lacks in understanding.
@@raineterni2219 the more that ive learned from analyzing allistic behaviour myself, and collaborating with other autistic folks, the more I have come to understand that a lot of allistic folks can't comprehend that not everyone interacts with other humans, or displays their emotions, in the same way that they themselves do, without even recognizing that their fellow allistics aren't actually even doing it the same way as themselves, simply close enough that they can't tell. This does not apply for all allistics, obviously, but it is an extremely common occurrence and increasingly seems likely to be at the core of this interpretation on their part. Hope this helps some, even if only in the way that knowing a cause can provide some minor comfort.
I was diagnosed 'profoundly' ADHD at 13 and dusted up to the eyeballs on Ritalin to get through school. At 39, I'm only coming out of this and realising that I have a great power of mind that is not deficient.
Yep me too I Don't struggle too much anymore not as much as when I was a kid but I can get overwhelmed with too many Things going on at once How trouble keeping appointments and keeping tidying things like Critical thinking and deep thinking and Thinking about things that normal people don't even bother with Learning new things everywhere I can Find I'm better Sitting and listening to what I want to learn then having somebody shove it down my throat And have me regurgitate it back to them in the form of Homework! Plus when you're not getting attention enough at home sometimes bad attention is better than no attention and Children and even adults may attention as well
I would qualify as being ADHD what I find helps is a diet low in carbs, fasting frequently and doing cardiovascular exercise. And naturally my symptoms go away.
NT's ruined my life trying to make me like them. Decades later I'm trying to find myself and figure out who I am, find something to care about, and find a reason to keep on living.
I totally understand that it's easy to feel pressured by NT. But if you say that, they see it as blame rather than grasp it's asking for more kindness. 😂 Therefore, never be afraid to be you & remove wearing the unhealthy masks. It'll sadly only make you ill. They will not care as it does not impact their reality. So only wear masks to protect your energy & life path. People who want to know you, will understand it's a coping mechanism & not a barrier based upon unfounded emotion.
Those barriers are entirely because "neurotypicals" are dedicating 80 percent of their runtime playing how-are-you im-fine-thanks handshake protocol games while i am trapped by the question, placed on the spot and forced to discuss personal information like how i am and the demander is now annoyed by my breach of protocol. How can anyone function rationally dancing on that empty protocol treadmill
No, to you it appears to be a protocol because you are autistic. To everyone else, it is a seamless unconscious think that facilitates human interaction. And it’s not empty and not a treadmill as there’s a subtlety to it and an opportunity to talk about whatever you’d like
@@EggEnjoyer This kind of interaction is called "Phatic" conversation. It plays its role. It also sucks for neurodivergent people and there should be more awareness and room in society for leniency on phatic conversation. When computers perform handsake protocols (i.e. while accessing the internet) it's seamless to us as users - we don't see it or notice it - so both of these descriptions of phatic language ('handshake' vs 'seamless' ) are two sides of the same coin.
@@klavczarkalafan4191 I’ve never had a hard time conversing with an autistic person. You can tell when people are neurodivergent, yes, but they generally aren’t hard to talk to. I think the kinds of people to complain about small talk are just terminally online. And they have little to no social exposure. Because neurodivergents I see in real life don’t struggle and fail so hard at socializing. I mean maybe I’m biased because the ones that do just don’t talk. But the ones that do talk, do well socially. And I know divergence is a spectrum. But I personally believe that most autistic people have the capacity and ability to learn and adapt this stuff. I don’t like this terminally online message of “we’re too different neurotypicals. We’ll never fit in. We can’t even do small talk”. I see you guys doing it everyday, you are capable more than you give yourselves credit or realize.
I'm not diagnosed yet, but in the process of an assessment. Ever since I first started researching autism and realising that it filled a huge void I had, I immediately made this realisation about society and it empowered me because I realised how much of a vice society is and how I was made to believe I was broken by such constructs.
@@richardsteiner45you hope they're looking for a crutch? Why are you so quick to judge though. It wasn't at all necessary to conduct yourself that way. Do you feel better when you take a fake power stance this way? When you have the convenience of controlling to read a comment or not so you can unload on a person then just skate off? I'm not even upset with you, more so I just wanna know your logic, and reasoning to do something so passive aggressive to a random person, who was just trying to feel a part of something. Either way, if they're on the spectrum or not, it's even still up for debate, as is the case for many of us here on the Spectrum. It's not a pissing contest either though. You know it's like being prideful because you can reach a higher shelf in the store. Woohoo, you're the tallest Midget, but you're still a midget. (idc little person whatever) you get the point. I am sorry for the message, but try and separate it from the self and see it more so as a teachable moment, we all have them in life. No shame in that, I hope you don't just do the obvious and double down... Cheers!
@@ZooPactit’s the fact the society lies to garner attention and the fact that my dudes speech was entirely about himself and how he feels; I would say he came to a conclusion of “this dudes looking for something to fill a void (i.e. it could possibly be filling the void is looking for reasons to be different in order to feel special and valid). Who knows what his personal experiences have been but he said it for a reason😊(hope this helps with the logic behind what he said) One day the original commenter will find what he’s missing in life. At the end of the day we are all lost
@@IsItKebabOrTurd I appreciate your comment, truly I do, and for being constructive. Thank you for that... and everything you're saying is super fair, and is absolutely valid if it actually applies. But does it actually apply? That's my issue, is that you can't or rather shouldn't just assume with such certainty. I mean okay imagine if you were him, alright, and you were 100% coming from a genuine place, best intentions, and someone told you "No! You're actually this way!" And wrote you off with that narrative. Now let's even go a step further okay, imagine if you were just a random person, and all of a sudden someone just accused you of something heinous, and labeled you the abuser. Told people, and authorities, totally painted you the wrong way. Now not a soul believes you, but you know the truth, how do you cope or how do you even advocate for yourself at this point? I mean that kind of suffocating feeling because you're innocent, but not in the eyes of the public. I'm just saying you're opinion is absolutely true if the rules apply, but do they?
@@IsItKebabOrTurd also too I know for myself personally being on the spectrum, I tend to talk about myself as well, and I don't mean it in a selfish way, but the only frame of reference that I have most times is from my own personal experience. Just wanted to add that additional factor to...
At 5.00 you were so right. Too many misread my acts of goodwill believing they must be in debt which confuses the daylights out of me, especially when I am not wanting to be their 'friend'. Great video
I got super confused yesterday when I let another student take a break and not give the critique she was supposed to give me on a project. The teacher said it was "really sweet" of me and I was like "what? I mean, clearly she's not feeling well enough to do it, so why should I expect her to? What's the usual norm in this situation? To force her to do it? Y'all are weird." 😂
@@RealAndromeda01 Agreed, this world works on manipulation. I have stopped being nice & grateful because I just don't believe it works anymore. Gratitude is give & take, not lifelong foot washing.
@@robertjohnburton9775this is only partly true. Between person to person who have a reason to care about each other, altruism and kindness do get you places and lead to people being truly comfortable around each other. Between a person and their boss, though, anything more than the bare minimum to not get canned is wasted effort, because that’s a relationship based on seeing how much they can exploit you. It’s about knowing context and the dynamics at play.
Just hang on, things are changing in the supposed "real world" very quickly. What was meant by "the meek shall inherit the earth" is that the autistic people, (and those who support & understand them), animals, and plants shall inherit the earth
Neurotypical majority is basically “what feels natural” even if what feels “natural” to them doesn’t mean happy, good, or effective Peer pressure and tradition aren’t inherently happy, good, or effective but it feels natural for a neurotypical person to be part of a group identity
I agree with being wired for altruism. "Authentic Altruism" is a term I came across which describes being so in tune with what others need that you also know when it's best to NOT swoop in and help. Sometimes what people need is a very simple accommodation or a "yeah that sucks", but you cannot make someone stop feeling bad. I often get frustrated when people try to "save" me from a negative experience I'm going through. They are hurting me rather than helping me because I know that I just need to process the thing on my own and gain the wisdom from it. Instead, they make me feel like there's something wrong with me for wanting to sit in suffering. Suffering must be eliminated at all costs and has no positive benefit whatsoever for the NT world for some reason. And they call neurodiverse people emotionally insensitive? Smh. Fun fact: apparently Buddhism is quite common among autistic people
Don’t tell other people what to believe in. Just because YOU believe in Christianity doesn’t mean Buddhist beliefs are wrong and yours are right. Keep your beliefs to yourself and leave others alone.
A few years ago I dislocated most of the bones in my left foot and the doctors were shocked by my X rays and told me that I would never be the same again. They said that I would be in constant pain for the rest of my life (not constant but at intervals everyday) and that I would never walk more than 5 miles in a day again (I now regularly do 5 miles and often do 10 in a day). I suffered profusely with the pain and some of the staff in the hospital were very cruel to me, I couldn't go out for months at a time and it was during a lockdown as well so I couldn't have visitors and food and supplies were just left at my door. I have never been in so much physical and psychological pain in my life but I would recommend the experience to anyone as it was the most enlightening and spiritual experience of my life. Eckhart Tolle asks: "What is good? And what is bad? Do you really know what is good for you and what is bad for you?"
I was diagnosed late after my son was diagnosed with autism. So I just spent my whole life not knowing why everyone seemed to have something wrong with them. I've never wanted to be like other people. In fact I stopped drinking tap water in case that was the reason. I've always wanted to find a way to help everyone because the way they are all living is just terrible and they don't even realise it. However, they always get angry whenever I make suggestions on how we all could live much happier lives. They really can't handle the thought of change even if the change would make everyone's lives better.
We’re so conditioned to believe the notion that “it’s society that’s wrong, not me” can’t be true because of how arrogant & narcissistic it sounds. But then I remember that 500 years ago, society believed the world was flat while one person said it wasn’t. And he was persecuted for it. But centuries later, he was proven right. So the idea that society is the problem and not me suddenly doesn’t seem so far fetched.
Galileo i think it was didnt say the earth was round. It was well known it was round then. He proposed heliocentrism, while the society he lived in believed in geocentrism
Yes and the same guy who said that doctors who worked with that bodies should wash their hands before they delivered babies because mother's kept dying and they didn't know why and the man who said they should wash their hands ended up being put insane at the end of his life Never given proper recognition for dropping mother mortality significantly From 20% to 2% Until modern society Basically Same with the guy who said that germs exist everyone's like oh OK there's tiny little bugs that crawl on everything that we can't see but they're there yeah Yeah sure! Oh and they make us sick too OK right But I lost he was right Same with the guy who realized everybody was getting sick because they We're drinking from a while that was contaminated with feces dead animals End god knows what else Problem is this is hard to know who is insane and who is correct until It's actually proven LOL
I like that also. It seems nowadays people are very often addressed like how you would talk to a child. This is how the overall tone and mode of presentation frequently comes across. Of course it seems more grown people than ever are indeed childish and immature, but certainly not all of us.
@@FlamingCockatiel Hmm good question...I'm guessing it's a result of it, based on my memory of how things were presented to people before the internet got really big. I was born in 1985, so I've seen a little bit of the evolution of this stuff from before the pre-digital era, though I'm not old enough to have the perspective like previous generations before mine would have. Roughly the last 15 to 20 years or so, is probably when things started changing the most noticeably.
I’ve not been tested or diagnosed as having ADHD and/or autism, but I’ve always been an outsider, even in my family. I have trouble organizing my everyday life, but I’m known for my problem-solving skills. I can look at a problem and see a solution, even in a field I know little about. I’m befuddled and sometimes shocked by people whose agendas I don’t understand. People who behave illogically are hard for me to deal with. I cannot be bored, because I’m interested in everything, but sometimes, it’s lonely being different. This video all makes perfect sense to me. Thank you for de-pathologizing a way of being and thinking that is a gift, if you don’t try to force yourself to fit in. I’m 70, and I know that’s not happening.
I'm just being diagnoses but I know I'm autistic. I am starting to get quite cross about the fact that we have to mask in order to make NTs feel comfortable when they dont make accommodations to make us feel comfortable. Once of the main reasons I feel uncomfortable is that I just want to be nice and do things for its own sake, not for money or gratitude from others. I just want to be nice and I feel very hurt when other people don't act in a nice way. I don't understand why anyone would not act in a nice way and don't tell the truth, I get taken advantage of a lot because I look for the good in people and want to trust them. Now I don't trust anyone because I can't trust my own judgement so I have to not connect with anyone. That makes me really upset and depressed but the world is not a safe place so I just stay in my own little world that I can control and where I don't have to deal with people
As an autistic anthropologist I know it to be true that, since humans have moved away from nature there have been exquisitely sensitive people, who think holographically and empathetically, to live as emissaries and translators between worlds. Whether these people are labeled autistics, shamans, psychics, psychotics, animal communicators…is solely based on the culture in which these people find themselves.
This is such an interesting comment, i was just speaking with my eldest & saying - what if nuerodivergent’s have abilities that nuerotypicals don’t have. More senses, which is why nuerodivergents experience sensory overload
I see details in nature that neurotypicals don't often see. On another note. Do you think the great stone hand tool knapping breakthroughs by homo species most likely were made by neurodivergents? I was thinking about possible higher brain function in mathematics and geometry may have helped ?
I have said this years ago. We see the truth, the mess made around us, and we react against it. Others suffer it and try harder. We need autistics in charge of everything. ❤
@@dmgroberts5471"I'm autistic accept me, society is mean and we should be equal 😢😢😢" "ok so everyone in charge should be autistic (exactly like me) to best fit mainly autistic interests/because I believe I am superior to neurotypicals" ?
I'm a neurotypical libertarian and I'm convinced that autists are overrepresented amongst anarchist and libertarians. I suspect this is due to them having had bad experiences with society and hierarchy in general combined with an ability to be self-sufficient. Weaponised autism is not just a joke meme off of 4chan.
Sadly, I think another problem is that autistics realize we don't measure up, whereas NTs are in denial about not measuring up. It doesn't make us immune to the pressure though. Thanks! 💜
But you DON'T measure up. Everything an autist can do, there is a neurotypical somewhere that can do it too. Autists can't do everything neurotypicals can do.
I don't look at it like that. You do measure up. NT's have a mind that very easily hooks into monitoring the cues in a social environment in lenses we don't peer through. Please don't devalue yourself. That's not a good thing, take it from someone who was devalued. The answer, I believe, lies in the world working its way to a point where we can own our own psychological and mental health issues better as a society, see through our own shame more, own our own shadows (everyone has them, Austistic people included. Just ask my parents who have apologized to us for shit moves during our childhood. And our whole family is Autistic or nuerodivergent.) A world where we can learn to love ourselves no matter what, and love each other the best we can too. A world where we grow the strength to love without making excuses.... but extend our vision of wisdom past the intense narratives of vengeful, black and white punishments we have now. Christianity, I personally feel, has had to evolve further in it's ways of interpretations, understandings, and applications in the world we currently live in since its conception. I haven't been Christian for over a decade.... I'm Wiccan now..... but I firmly feel that the inspiration of deep, merciful forgiveness was clearly onto something important and redemptive for a human need. Perhaps, while people may also choose Christianity or other religions to find some redemption for themselves..... we could also learn to redeem ourselves and each other better.... and handle correlating themes like Love, Justice, Balance, Consequences, constructive Discipline, Shame, Isolation, Fear, etc.... all themes that I think feel definitely might allow the negative, dictating, simplistic, fear based, and mob mentality narratives from toxic places.... places that are from hidden spaces that don't have our best interests at heart........ I feel that if humanity kept working towards a world which understood and promoted healthier systems that healed more mental health and helped people work through those themes better...... eventually less people will be in unhealthy mind states that leave them vulnerable to toxic mob mentality herding. My theory is: nuerotypicals have a very socially linked mind that is very receptive to social influence and hierachy, and quicker to spread group think with each other, despite the other strengths that mind might provide to help glue our social world together the way we know it....... Or/and....... having the nuerotype shared by the majority of the population means that shitty dark narratives of this world and social manipulations will be rigged to hit nuerotypicals quicker as a group.
As far as I know, I am not autistic or neurodivergent. I want to say that this is one of the most incredible talks I have heard in a very long time. I am going to keep watching this channel
I used to think as someone with aspergers that feeling like an outcast was lonely or a bad thing. Now I'm starting to realize it is more of a " neurotypical " type of problem.
aspergers is literally not even a diagnosis anymore and is subsumed into the "autism" umbrella. it's just another word for high functioning autism. @@OzymandiasWasRight
The more you depend on others for validating your ideas, the less you reveal to others to try to 'maintain' your fake relationship with them. Everyone is here to tell you their version of the 'right' way and if you deviate, you are judged to be bad. They expect you to be fake for you to be judged as 'good'.
Thanks for the video. Over the last year I have realised, how conned I was. Getting diagnosed, has opened my eyes to the con. As I slowly learn more about myself I see the world with wonder
The other day. I was walking near an autistic counterpart who was stimming (in this instance rocking back) and whilst walking in a circle. I made sure to slow down and catch their eyes 👀 and say 👋 hello. They seemed so surprised that I was accepting them. Some else saw me do this and felt like talking to me too because they new that I would not judge them with malice ❤. No not I 😤. I have too much love and care no longer about being a “normal (not weird)”
Definitely! I can say this because when I was undiagnosed for the first 47 years of my life, ‘passing’ for NT, this is precisely what I thought and believed!
Yes. That's exactly what most people think, they think we're just like them, except for being "scared" of social stuff. They don't realize that we have a whole different psychology.
This is exactly what we think. And why would we not? When 35 of every 36 experiences is with other neurotypicals, our experience of the world validates society's quasi-religious mantra that we're all the same. So, if everyone operates the same (which is what society and experience condition us to believe), the logical conclusion (logic is something that autists pride themselves on) would be that you are simply bad at being the same everyone else. This is a completely reasonable and logical conclusion given the assumed axioms. What percentage of the population do you think have any knowledge of what neurotypes are and that there are a variety of them? Blaming neurotypicals for their completely reasonable behaviour given the statistics and awareness is not going to get the outcome you are looking for.
@@robokill387You’re painting all of a group in a broad brush while not wanting to be painted with a broad brush. I have been around people with numerous disabilities my whole life. It’s very easy for me to get along with people who have autism, and find ways to connect with them. However, I’d say it’s an undeniable deficiency that almost none of them can look me in the eye, gauge the nuances of why I’m saying something to them, they struggle to psychoanalyze others, are so literal that useful metaphorical language and ideas can go right over their head. Instead of getting upset and blaming “society” which does absolutely nothing, realize each person has strengths and deficiencies. Simple as that. I have adhd, and sure if I lived in a tribe I would probably not notice it, but I don’t live in a tribe, I’m connected to society. Therefore it’s important for me to understand how to use the helpful aspects of adhd, and cope with the difficulties it causes as well. I don’t blame society, or others.
I became a therapist ( not psychological )and absolutely loved it , After 17 years & treating sooo many people including medical professionals, I can say that a lot more people are on our wavelength than you can imagine . I know a lot of people mask , hide , ignore and deny their non neurotypical ways . Most of us are just winging it . Even the celebs we see who have it all together .
This is my self talk all day everyday since diagnosis earlier this year. Typicals try and “help” me but all that masking just makes me neurotic. Being authentically myself freaks out the typicals but gives me my sanity back.
I was locked up in a hospital for a week ending Christmas day and treated like a criminal since I didn't fit. Through my life I struggled to understand myself and constantly felt inadequate. Everything I achieved needed more effort than others. I didn't receive any help I needed at a younger age and it meant I had to pretend to act "normal". Well I ended up being very successful in many ways. We aren't lesser at all. If anything we are more.
Wow I’m so happy that I watched this. I don’t know if I’m autistic and I will never know but I refuse to wear a mask. But the last time I struggled so hard with everything and everyone because I was so honest about it. I felt so alone because everyone seemed to be so in control and thinking differenttly. I have strong sense of justice and so many things that are happening in front of me are really hard to ignore. I felt so lonely and still do because I think completely different. Maybe it’s something else but this video spoke to me in a different way. It’s really hard for me to connect to people ( they connect with me but I do not with them) and I always think something is wrong with me and I copy the behavior of normal people, maybe I will be more happier. But this video showed me that maybe they are wrong. So thank u 🙏🏽❤
It's funny to me how many NT people I've met who think all autistic people are the same. A lot of them genuinely don't seem to understand that we are unique people with a unique personality outside of our autism.
@@Muhluriand lack of empathy they just want us gone. Cause we scare, we bore them, we emotionally tax them, and we remind them their worst insecurities about themselves
Another interesting example of this is the game we happy few. It's a very interesting game:). I have never realy tried to be "normal" and now im trying to let myself relax and do the things that i enjoy and give me comfort. These last few month's i have noticed that i never realy feel at ease when im home with my parent's. Like i have been low key masking at home aswell. They only place i feel compleetly relaxed is when im with my fiance:). He has diagnosed autism and we can just be our weirdest self around eachother:).
I like the way you think and how you presented this~ I never thought of things that way. I self-identify as autistic as it explains everything I've known, felt, and experienced in my life. Few believe me when I say it, but fellow autistics always say, "Well, Duh." Life's been rough and I nearly lost myself many times, but now I'm living my best life because I finally embraced all that I am. I wish more people could see neurodivergent souls the we way we do~ The neurotypical are often mind-boggling to me!
I had a bpd diagnosis a while back and few days ago my docs told me i am on the autism spectrum and I cried so bad cause i finally understood why its so difficult and exhausting to "fit in" my mind has become absolutely ill stressing over why people hated me so much? why is it so hurtful to deal with "normal" "healthy" people they are so mean? why this "normal" behavior seems so wrong? well my brain is just wired different and ive been conned. i do not need to fit in, theres no real need for me to act as someone im not. My happiness lies in small things and its okay that im not chasing after great things like "normal" people do. I am not normal, i will never be, i am in fact different and that does not mean i dont deserve respect or to be treated like a human being. The people who are close to me love me so much! my heart is definitely in the right place and that is all that matters to me! ❤
@@keylanoslokj1806 just speak for yourself. You’re generalizations of others is worse than anything the “typical” folks have put you through. Wait, am I not allowed to say that because I don’t know you? Hmm.
I know that this video is two years old, but it just popped up in my feed today, and I am so very glad it did. Just honestly really needed to hear this right now. Thank you.
I think this also applies to those who were labeled "bipolar" when it was in fashion. Anything to suppress truth tellers I guess. We are in fact, the biggest threat to the status quo. Great video, thank you!
This is so true . Nature is just perfect as it is , neurodivergents are actually truer, more authentic and honest . To me these are so valuable quality and I am still hoping to find more and more people that are neurodivergent. Neurotypical people are often flat and experience some empathy but rarely dare to fully love and defend and put truth above their ego unless they are very very wise and brave to be vulnerable and take the risk of being avoided.
Thanks so much for this great video statement! I was only recently diagnosed and have been fighting the system for 50+ years. Now I have blissfully stopped playing the game!
The overlap between my personality disorder(BPD) and Autism is uncanny. We have so many of the same traits but then we are overloaded by our emotions and our inability to shut down the hateful voices from our past that are constantly standing behind us, reminding us of why we have no friends. Its like having a demon twin, that is always there, that weirdly looks out for us because without us, it wouldnt exist but often does more harm than good. I can be myself but only when others arent present. The disorder creates *roles* that are expected of me depending on the group I am in. During the pandemic, a lot of those roles got shattered and my true self emerged. It scared the people in my peer group, they thought I was having a Mental Breakdown. That's when I realised, that the people that had known me for decades, had NEVER really known me at all. Only their projection of who I was. It reminded me of this alignment I created for a D and D campagin, ages ago called NIL. Nil is neither good nor bad, it is what people expect to see. So someone looking at you thinking you are wicked will see an evil alignment and someone else looking expecting you to be noble, will see a good alignment and someone who doesnt think you are either one, will see a rainbow of constantly moving, often clashing colours because I am neither and both all at the same time.
Best thing I have found with The Tism is "Disipline, responsibility, and never using the word deficient" in regards to the diagnosis. Positive motivation and consistency is key. My sons school that specializes in Children with Autism hasn't been able to teach my son to spell or read, 3 weekends of him and I 1 on 1 working, and he is finally excited and positive about his learning, and making progress. Never let the diagnosis shape your future. My son also has pushed past his sensory issues, and is experimenting with new cloths rather then tanktop, and shorts all the time. So proud of him ❤️ ❤❤😊
I know a young lady who is autistic. Her biggest challenge is getting away from her mother who has declared herself her daughter's savior. Poor girl is 30 years old and being guilted into living at home because her mothers attachment issues.
I feel this deep in my soul. It took me years to realise interactions with others were transactional, not everyone is happy for you when you win & the vast majority of ppl are compliant. As RFKennedy Jr put it, 'no one's ever complied their way out of totalitarianism' THANK YOU so much, for this.
Thank you so much for this video. Being autistic myself, I genuinely feel sorry for neurotypicals. It must be Hell for these people, worrying about their place in the "hierarchies" they apparently believe in.
I don't know if it's entirely (an admitted) hell for them. I think it gives them a sense of security which is why they hate or fear people who disrupt it.
Frankly, if we keep on talking about our differences making us so much better than each like you just did. I don't want to live in your Society either.
@@katalinmigray2527it’s absolutely understandable for a person to want to avoid the disquieting truth that the bedrock they think most societal systems were built on was sand the whole time and the contractors were embezzling the construction funds the whole time too. Suddenly being aware of how precarious, artificial, counterproductively designed, and in some cases malicious the world you live in is bad enough, but knowing it only continues to exist as such because everyone’s been convinced by the perverse system’s beneficiaries to buy in and clap if they believe is in some cases a thing that hits more personally.
@@SoullessAIMusicDo whatever tf you want. Neurotypicals bullied and marginalised us all our lives. Often with immense pleasure. So we will call out their very many vices all we want. Also perfect utopia will never exist cause no two brains are the same and people are selfish
I'm autistic, but I've always seen this more as an issue of right-wing thinking, particularly its emphasis on capitalism and hierarchies- you'll see that everyone has their own "rightful place", that people should "live within their means", that those who can't operate within their society are inherently inferior and deserve the bottom rung- indeed, that those who are at the top got there solely because they worked hard and were more deserving of it, even when that is provably false. I am seeing a bit of the autistic/allistic division in there, but that doesn't seem to be all there is to it.
I couldn't agree more. As a non-neurotypical person, I have come to believe that we on the spectrum are the more normal ones, while the so-called "neurotypical" are the ones with the condition.
Thank you for your video, I identify greatly with it as a fellow Autistic. I haven't been called unemphatic but I have been told many times that I'm intimidating because I have resting bitch face when I'm not masking for others. Also, thank you for not medicalizing us. That also means a lot to me.
Society is too confusing too complicated and being autistic self diagnosed right now getting tested in July I find this video perfect because it describes what I have gone through and what I’ve tried to do with trying to be like any of the Nuro typical‘s and becoming burned out many times over my entire life and still not being able to figure out anything and never function normally in school or being able to make it maintain friendships mostly maintaining unable to but I am married now have been for the last 21 years and I still get confused with things that my wife does but I love her anyways and no one seems to understand when it comes down to keeping the house clean and other things that I can only handle so much a day and with pretty much taking care of my wife completely because she is in a power wheelchair with limited use of her hands and she can’t bear weight I do everything to take care of her and then when I’m done doing all that and keeping track of all the steps I’m usually wore out afterwards to where I have to sit and relax and find something that makes me feel good and recharge my own batteries then I can try and work on getting other stuff done but I also have to deal with sounds light textures and other things that annoy the living daylights out of me thank you for reading this message I greatly appreciate it
Two months ago, at the age of 45, I was unexpectedly diagnosed as autistic. The news was shocking. Interestingly, when explaining my experience to others, I often use the analogy of being ‘unplugged from the Matrix’. This vividly captures the sensation I felt then and continue to feel now. Good video, worth a follow!
When I was diagnosed with (Aspergers at the time) it in my early 20s it came more as a relief. Here I had these shared experiences with so many people. My anti-orthodox ways of thinking wasn’t a deficiency. I may have struggled to learn like the other kids, but once I got something I held onto it a lot better. I don’t see one as better than the other (neurotypical vs autistic), i do think both benefit from the other.
Although one thing that as an autistic I did view as transactional or at least a two-way street was respect. That one I know I came up with myself because one of the two people who you learn from first (your parents) was annoyed when I didn’t unconditionally show her respect regardless of whether or not she gave me enough respect to treat me as more than a series of assets because of what I could give her.
This is brilliant! This is an amazing video that for the most part saved my life. at the minimum I think it definitely stopped my descent into despair and depression and with that halted I was able to get a foothold in my mind to deal with my recent diagnosis of Asperger syndrome, which happened a couple of months ago at age 54. First two things I learned after my diagnosis was that the life expectancy for us was 54 and that the leading cause of death was suicide and although it was a cold pill to swallow it didn’t surprise me at all. this is an amazing piece of work and the message is extremely relevant and profound. I think one day it’ll be cannon for people like us. You were in an incredible zone when you came up with this one because its an important message both meaningful and relevant. It’s definitely something I needed to hear. I watch this video regularly almost have it memorized. I thank you for writing it and more importantly for sharing it.
It’s always such a good feeling watching videos from other autistic people and just feeling understood and being able to say “WOAH I’m the same way!” One of those things where it’s like “Well duh no one is every alone in the universe” but still I smile and get this feeling of “There are other people who understand” I feel like I often times forget just how manipulative the world of NTs is, really makes me appreciate being autistic. The fact that these people are wired to think so strategically about something as simple as existing in a human space is wild. Also strange who people seem to value this idea of being “true to yourself” and having honestly and yet us autistic people are othered by society simply for seeing no point in trying to flatter or deceive. Why should I want to hide things from others? I don’t need people to love a facade, I need them to love me.
I am Autistic and I have never given it that much thought. I run my life and I do not care what people think. I remember having to break in my teachers in grade school. They fought me for a week or two, then they let me go because they knew I would do all my work at my pace...not theirs!!! And they watched me to see how doing it my way worked out. In 12 years of school I was never told to sit in the hall, and I never went to the principals office. I was trusted by all my teachers, because as you pointed out,,, We don't lie, cheat, or steal!!! Today, I am living in the middle of nowhere in The Comanche Nation!!! Apache Indians help rid my 4 acres of Diamondback Rattlesnakes, and I collect Crow, and Hopi art as my life's hobby of living in a museum. "The Addams family house if you will!!!" So, for many Aspergers syndrome comes with social constraints. Not for me!!! Brother James Kendall Moore OSB OFS OSC
I've always thought this, putting people on a spectrum and calling them disabled or labelled as something wrong, just because they think differently to the supposed normal. I've always found this very disturbing with society. The autistic people I've known have been very smart, loving and kind and you wouldn't be able to tell. That is supposed to be disabled? I know with the spectrum so vast some have difficulty getting dressed etc, but then at the other end there are people who i know, where you couldn't tell and just think different. The Vastness of the spectrum is what disturbs me. its like it now encompasses any so called outliers
“There’s autistic people who think that neurotypical people are all happier than them. Have dozens of friends and perfect romantic relationships. The lack of these drives their anxiety and depression.”
The first part of truth is the realisation that you don’t have to “fit in”. The second part of truth is understanding that you have the choice in how you think and therefore feel in any given moment. Neurotypical and victim people are offended by this statement and that’s fine. It’s definitely harder for certain people like those who have autistic tendencies. I am one of these but have changed my world by slowing the world to my pace, and reprogramming my mind to the present. Learning self love is the bedrock of all of this and that only comes with loving everything else. Even the manipulators. I was then able to accept and enjoy who I am and move into a content mindset. Autistic people should understand they actually have a head start over others for the very reason that they don’t fit the neurotypical profile. In other words they are more free from societal programming. Love to all ❤
The term "neuro-typical" is a real problem. This conversation can not evolve until that term is dealt with and by dealt with, I mean thrown away into the abyss forever and replaced by something that actually describes something valid. The language used can erect blockades and that term erected one a mile high which is why someone came up with it in the first place. The language is created before the argument happens, thus pre-deciding the winner of the argument. "Neuro-typical" has no validity as a scientific term whatsoever. What the hell is typical? There is certainly no definition for that. I'm not even disagreeing with your general points, I actually agree with you on most things, I just have an issue with that term that calls me "neuro typical." I'd be interested in hearing your thoughts on this. Great video. Very nicely presented.
I can only recommend the show called Daria. Daria is autistic in a neurotypical world. Well, Idk if there is an official statement that says Daria is autistic, but so many autistic women could resonate with her, that she was on the profile picture of the r/autisminwomen subreddit.
NT: "Hi, how are you?" ... **Cranks abnormally enormous resource hungry engine in brain** **Attempts to forsee each outcome of all possible answers** **Fighting urge to vent how youve spent your entire life in near hell where socialising is an almost impossible task which is just expected of you everyday along side trying not to be repulsed by other sensory overloads simultaneously**
I remember hearing somewhere else, that the issue isnt that we are sick. Rather the world we live in is sick. Which makes a hell of a lot of sense cause theres so much that makes 0 logical sense. And thanks to all this it feels like living in a parallel world all the time. Including with the way our brains work. It provides me that ability to look in from the outside and spot things others cant or refuse to see. But it also means always being seperate. I can get close to the same track but forever cursed to ride the rail to the side. Or as one of my favorite quotes from Monk. "Its a gift! And a curse!"
When my mother was young, she worked at a summer camp for the mentally disabled. There she met a guy who was older than her, but was said to have the mental capacity of an infant. The guy got interested in a football once and my mother decided to teach him how to play. Every other person working there was skeptical, they thought there was no point in teaching him because he wouldn't be able to learn. Guess what? He learned very quickly. I bet if people had always treated him as someone with potential, he wouldn't have even been on that camp.
I think we have to remember that we're all human. As social animals, we fare better if we have diversity in our pack. Someone has to remember what the consensus is, and we don't really care for social norms. Someone has to innovate, and they're afraid of the unknown. Everyone serves a purpose.
I love this channel and thank you! I sat and cried because of how close to home this was/is.... I only found out this year that this was what has been sold to us (and others) and I was scammed. It's given me a new lease of life.
As an autist that was not diagnosed as a child, life has been really crazy and traumatic. I had to find out many things discussed on here by myself with no assistance. I began suspecting I had autism around 10 years old when my parents and I moved away from our family's location and I had to meet a whole new network of people. I stood out like a sore thumb and was reprimanded heavily both internally and externally due to my social solitude. Later on, other autists began to be born into my family. It was a sign to me, that probably I am. I have yet to get diagnosed, as I do not hold trust in the medical industry of my country. The last thing I want is to try to force myself to plug into the system with the use of a pill.
The best part of this video and the comments about it, for me, is knowing I'm not alone i being a congenital truth teller and truth seeker, and that I'm not alone feeling like I'm outside the social status system, and I'm totally cool with that. I think I'm finally finding the tribe I didn't know I had, and it's a great feeling!
As someone with ADHD, I don’t relate to all of this, but man do I relate to a lot of it. I utterly despise the social game that the world plays and the older I get, the more I realize that I’m not the only one who doesn’t have it all together - I just can’t hide it like they can. Thanks a lot for this video. Honestly has helped me shift my view of myself and my place in society in a positive way.
I was thrown out of an organisation that didn't like me. It was a charity that provided a paid-for service. I asked a lot of direct questions and I noted different answers or no answers from different members of staff. I questioned this. They didn't like it. I also had a couple of meltdowns/breakdowns, mainly due to my beloved dad passing away (whilst I was with this organisation.) They immediately suspended me. I attended a meeting with them supported by an advocate. They lied to me and said they'd seek support for me so I could continue to use their services, but with appropriate support. They never did this. We wrote to them, asking them about everything they said at the meeting but didn't do, emphasising all they caimed that they would do to help support me to continue to attend. I received a terse reply telling me they'll have no further contact with me. That's how we get treated. I have many other examples too, unfortunately.
You're amazing. I really miss you since I left Twitter. On mastodon now with a wonderful autistic community. You were there for me when nobody else was.
As a mum and auntie of neuro spicy people, I often make the case that humanity is very spicy. Labelling people, including ourselves, has become an obsession. A bad one. Every person is a universe, and we should take joy in self discovery and gaining understanding of each other. Also think the Western Anglo civilisation is more "neurotypical" in how it's set up and driven, than most other ethnic groups. Eastern Europeans especially, and Latinos that I'm well aquainted with, are definitely more neurospicy, as are the cultures.
@@PretendingToBeAHumanIs a psychopathic serial killer, or serial abuser, or a leech politician, the exact same with an altruistic productive empath? Noz or course people have to be judged and compared to a degree
✨🔥💖🔥✨ For me it's the truth and justice... Even children are raised to be honest and fair, but as soon as we become adults it's all manner of deceit. I could never be on code... Everything is just a mess and I'm called weird bc I call it out and am genuinely just beside myself w the illusions and delusions people call "normal".
Being neurotypical does not imply being psychologically healthy.
We live in an emotionally traumatized, Cluster B type world.
Facts
I'd say that being NT implies being psych. healthy, but it doesn't MEAN that it's so...
@@toltekrecords Ties in with the problem of pathologization. Being NT means there's nothing DIAGNOSABLY different and/or wrong, but diagnosis or lack thereof clearly does not say much about someone's happiness or ability to navigate society.
Cluster B?
@@ingridmorgan7893 DSM IV
When I found out why I have never been able to be accepted by NT's, and how I would need to give up honesty and other things we cherish to be like them, I lost interest in being in their "club." I wish I had some autistic friends offline to have a coffee and a chat with, though.
Have you tried setting up a Meetup acct.?
@@katalinmigray2527 No. I don't know how.
@@raven4090 You can look it up online. Just google Meetup. But here in AZ we have autism places that also have group meetings. I got the info. from the people who diagnosed me.
It’s also partially because almost every single person with autism that I meet has very specific interests, whereas most people need many, many different talking points to stimulate them over the course of a long conversation. I also feel that people with autism generally are not that interested in truly hearing what I have to say on an emotional level, because that type of thinking requires too much nuance for them. It’s also because people with autism can become overbearing.
That being said, there is nothing inherently wrong with any of that, except for low emotional intelligence. There is great value in people with autism, and obviously it would be better if society was shaped more naturally and not around a rat race for money, so that people who are neurodivergent would find their place of value.
@@lukekiefer5964 You haven't met me. I have many interests, can adapt to changes in subjects when I talk to people, and have high emotional intelligence. The saying is true: "When you've met one autistic person, you've met ONE autistic person." NT's generally just don't like us for reasons that aren't good excuses to not like someone.
I don't regret who I've become and am quite happy being autistic; I just regret not learning sooner that there are people and places I have to avoid. Being cast out by a society that hates differences means absolute freedom.
Their society sucks ....your better off 🙂
I've been growing up suppressing down anxiety from my experiences with miscommunication since school as an undiagnosed human being with "minor" autism. I can't fathom myself being content with life without worry about the constant feeling of social disconnect whenever I have to speak to someone. I love pets, but they simply remind me that I'm comfortable with them, but not with people, which only lowers my mood.
Explain. How can it mean freedom? Wouldn’t it be even more lonely?
@@rachel_espinoza It's freedom because you don't have to live by someone elses expectations. Too many people follow along because they're so worried about what others think of them. You can take care of your responsibilies and reach your goals without anyone distracting you.
@@rachel_espinozathe greater the freedom the greater the loneliness.. and not the other way round
Ever notice how our "deficiency" is the ability to think critically? Very telling.
The ability to have a working brain
Doesn't autism involve executive dysfunction, problem solving, planning and other cognitive related problems?
@@andrewmatthews6263depends on the form. Its a spectrum and really what it is is indeprendent or novel neural development.
You dont need to be autistic to be bad at any of those, just as you dont always need to be neurotypical to have a deeper view or idea of something.
Autism is where independent development or "nature" overcomes societally infouenced development or "nurture"
@@andrewmatthews6263 yes by neurotypical societal standards, in a world that isn't built to accommodate us, that's the point of the video. If autistics could set the rules for functioning, problem solving skills and strategies and thought processes they'd blow everyone else out of the water in terms of performance.
@@andrewmatthews6263 being forced to behave and do things you're just not good at or can't handle or comprehend, can appear like a problem from the outside when really it's a different process that produces a different result, and has different requirements to function
What i've learned, by studying them after a forced hyperfixation on the way they are because I used to think I was wrong, is that neurotypical people project their insecurities and deficiencies onto us.
Yeah that's something I've noticed we can get blamed for their inadequacies and insecurities
It’s a human condition- you’re not better than anyone
Yeah for sure I’m being blamed for my step moms incompetence she was designated trustee
I never understood doing this. Then again, I'm not insecure and I'm not nuerotypical, so...
They think we should see our traits as flaws. They don't understand we have come to love and find comfort in our differences. 😊
My grandfather was autistic, he was also an aeronautical engineer and served in the Air Force as a high ranking officer for 30 years and serving in Vietnam and the Korean War, worked for the NSA and then a rocket propulsion company before retiring. An amazing man.
no, G-men are not amazing. they are part of the sheeple.
respect
Lol
Most neurotypical people arent ready to be unplugged but if you're autistic you’ve never been fully plugged in.
THIS. I FEEL. SO UNDERSTOOD.
Also, the weird serendipity of me wondering if i live in a matrix then unrelatedly finding this video when looking for autism content .
Autism to me is like a fail-safe. I literally cannot "fit in" and my body and mind prevents it. Extremely thankful actually.
i like being a Square peg in a round hole :-)
You go girl😊😊
Right?! I've been tricked into believing that fitting in is what I wanted on several occasions. Since people are generally passive, with some effort it's generally not too difficult. Just painfully boring. Eventually my brain may be responsible for socially sabotaging me, but that shouldn't imply it's not a welcomed relief.
I've been clean now 1yr now from decades of hardcore drug addiction but now I don't feel I fit in the world and I had an experience with christ that's how I eventually stopped drugs but I wasn't brought up in the church but I've been forcing myself to Go to church as the bible commands it I feel so anxious and out of place as the sermon ends and every gets a cuppa I end up being stressed to death about interacting with others I think it would be easier if there was other people there who's been thru a living hell of drug addiction I'd feel more at easy but there doesn't seam to behonestly it getting me so down bcos now I'm not in a relaxed state as I used to me on either valium,,heroin, methadone now I'm stone cold sober but I'm so fxxking stressed out.
@@leetlbt Just remember everyone who goes to church knows they're a sinner. "All have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God." Their struggle is no different from yours, you're both resisting the temptation of sin. Don't feel isolated, you're in the same boat and you have the same savior. I'm glad you were able to come to christ and escape your addiction, remember that Jesus loves you. Praise God.
Neurotypical syndrome is a neurological disorder characterised by preoccupation of social concerns, delusions of superiority, and obsessions of conformity.
Neurotypical individuals often assume their experience of the world is either the only one, or the only correct one.
NTs find it difficult to be alone.
NTs are often intolerant of minor differences in others.
When in groups NTs are socially and behaviourally ridgid, and frequently insist upon the performance of dysfunctional, destructive and even impossible rituals to maintain group identity.
NTs find it difficult to communicate directly, and have a much higher incidence of lying, as compared to someone without NT.
Neurotypical disorder is considered to be genetic in origin, brain autopsys have shown the NTs brain is typically smaller than non-NTs, and may have over developed areas related to social behaviour.
YES !!!😊
We are LIFE!
So true. I’ve always just liked what I like and think what I think. 🤔
The comment about the "lack of empathy" claim reminded me of an ex, who for most of the years together would consistently sing praises for how in touch I am with my emotions and my openness with them...but then also would in private sometimes refer to me as a robot, increasing more and more as our relationship struggled more and more. It has always baffled me how willing some neurotypical people are to de-person even those who they purported to love, as soon as any clashing happens, regardless of the subject of the clash.
I really hope we can build a world in which future generations aren't subjected to this devaluing, and often dehumanizing, that our current systems inflict on autistic and other neurodivergent folks.
Autistic people are far more empathetic i no i am,,
Yea... I'm autistic and hyper-empathic. We can have difference in empathy both ways, we aren't sociopaths and I'm still confused as to why do many neurotypicals think that... Maybe it's not us who lacks in understanding.
If you told a Neurotypical that better skin health means getting more tattoos, they’ll likely believe it if it is UNHEARD of.
@@raineterni2219 the more that ive learned from analyzing allistic behaviour myself, and collaborating with other autistic folks, the more I have come to understand that a lot of allistic folks can't comprehend that not everyone interacts with other humans, or displays their emotions, in the same way that they themselves do, without even recognizing that their fellow allistics aren't actually even doing it the same way as themselves, simply close enough that they can't tell. This does not apply for all allistics, obviously, but it is an extremely common occurrence and increasingly seems likely to be at the core of this interpretation on their part. Hope this helps some, even if only in the way that knowing a cause can provide some minor comfort.
I remember a girl I dated saying "you shouldn't talk like that, it makes you sound like a robot."
I was diagnosed 'profoundly' ADHD at 13 and dusted up to the eyeballs on Ritalin to get through school. At 39, I'm only coming out of this and realising that I have a great power of mind that is not deficient.
Riddilin fucked me up as a kid. Had to be taken off of it. My mom described me as a hellion
Side effects from endoctrination camps and shots. Sad really
Yep me too I Don't struggle too much anymore not as much as when I was a kid but I can get overwhelmed with too many Things going on at once How trouble keeping appointments and keeping tidying things like Critical thinking and deep thinking and Thinking about things that normal people don't even bother with Learning new things everywhere I can Find I'm better Sitting and listening to what I want to learn then having somebody shove it down my throat And have me regurgitate it back to them in the form of Homework! Plus when you're not getting attention enough at home sometimes bad attention is better than no attention and Children and even adults may attention as well
I would qualify as being ADHD what I find helps is a diet low in carbs, fasting frequently and doing cardiovascular exercise.
And naturally my symptoms go away.
I heard ADHD is The Highly Evolved Spiritual person in A 3 D body!!!❤❤❤
NT's ruined my life trying to make me like them. Decades later I'm trying to find myself and figure out who I am, find something to care about, and find a reason to keep on living.
I feel you
How's it going?
I totally understand that it's easy to feel pressured by NT. But if you say that, they see it as blame rather than grasp it's asking for more kindness. 😂 Therefore, never be afraid to be you & remove wearing the unhealthy masks. It'll sadly only make you ill. They will not care as it does not impact their reality. So only wear masks to protect your energy & life path. People who want to know you, will understand it's a coping mechanism & not a barrier based upon unfounded emotion.
Those barriers are entirely because "neurotypicals" are dedicating 80 percent of their runtime playing how-are-you im-fine-thanks handshake protocol games while i am trapped by the question, placed on the spot and forced to discuss personal information like how i am and the demander is now annoyed by my breach of protocol. How can anyone function rationally dancing on that empty protocol treadmill
hi, how are you this evening?
No, to you it appears to be a protocol because you are autistic. To everyone else, it is a seamless unconscious think that facilitates human interaction.
And it’s not empty and not a treadmill as there’s a subtlety to it and an opportunity to talk about whatever you’d like
@@EggEnjoyer This kind of interaction is called "Phatic" conversation. It plays its role. It also sucks for neurodivergent people and there should be more awareness and room in society for leniency on phatic conversation.
When computers perform handsake protocols (i.e. while accessing the internet) it's seamless to us as users - we don't see it or notice it - so both of these descriptions of phatic language ('handshake' vs 'seamless' ) are two sides of the same coin.
@@klavczarkalafan4191 Fair point.
@@klavczarkalafan4191 I’ve never had a hard time conversing with an autistic person. You can tell when people are neurodivergent, yes, but they generally aren’t hard to talk to.
I think the kinds of people to complain about small talk are just terminally online. And they have little to no social exposure. Because neurodivergents I see in real life don’t struggle and fail so hard at socializing. I mean maybe I’m biased because the ones that do just don’t talk. But the ones that do talk, do well socially. And I know divergence is a spectrum. But I personally believe that most autistic people have the capacity and ability to learn and adapt this stuff. I don’t like this terminally online message of “we’re too different neurotypicals. We’ll never fit in. We can’t even do small talk”.
I see you guys doing it everyday, you are capable more than you give yourselves credit or realize.
I'm not diagnosed yet, but in the process of an assessment. Ever since I first started researching autism and realising that it filled a huge void I had, I immediately made this realisation about society and it empowered me because I realised how much of a vice society is and how I was made to believe I was broken by such constructs.
@@richardsteiner452 years 2 late bud I don't know if he'll see this 1
@@richardsteiner45you hope they're looking for a crutch? Why are you so quick to judge though. It wasn't at all necessary to conduct yourself that way. Do you feel better when you take a fake power stance this way? When you have the convenience of controlling to read a comment or not so you can unload on a person then just skate off? I'm not even upset with you, more so I just wanna know your logic, and reasoning to do something so passive aggressive to a random person, who was just trying to feel a part of something. Either way, if they're on the spectrum or not, it's even still up for debate, as is the case for many of us here on the Spectrum. It's not a pissing contest either though. You know it's like being prideful because you can reach a higher shelf in the store. Woohoo, you're the tallest Midget, but you're still a midget. (idc little person whatever) you get the point. I am sorry for the message, but try and separate it from the self and see it more so as a teachable moment, we all have them in life. No shame in that, I hope you don't just do the obvious and double down... Cheers!
@@ZooPactit’s the fact the society lies to garner attention and the fact that my dudes speech was entirely about himself and how he feels; I would say he came to a conclusion of “this dudes looking for something to fill a void (i.e. it could possibly be filling the void is looking for reasons to be different in order to feel special and valid). Who knows what his personal experiences have been but he said it for a reason😊(hope this helps with the logic behind what he said) One day the original commenter will find what he’s missing in life. At the end of the day we are all lost
@@IsItKebabOrTurd I appreciate your comment, truly I do, and for being constructive. Thank you for that... and everything you're saying is super fair, and is absolutely valid if it actually applies. But does it actually apply? That's my issue, is that you can't or rather shouldn't just assume with such certainty. I mean okay imagine if you were him, alright, and you were 100% coming from a genuine place, best intentions, and someone told you "No! You're actually this way!" And wrote you off with that narrative. Now let's even go a step further okay, imagine if you were just a random person, and all of a sudden someone just accused you of something heinous, and labeled you the abuser. Told people, and authorities, totally painted you the wrong way. Now not a soul believes you, but you know the truth, how do you cope or how do you even advocate for yourself at this point? I mean that kind of suffocating feeling because you're innocent, but not in the eyes of the public. I'm just saying you're opinion is absolutely true if the rules apply, but do they?
@@IsItKebabOrTurd also too I know for myself personally being on the spectrum, I tend to talk about myself as well, and I don't mean it in a selfish way, but the only frame of reference that I have most times is from my own personal experience. Just wanted to add that additional factor to...
At 5.00 you were so right. Too many misread my acts of goodwill believing they must be in debt which confuses the daylights out of me, especially when I am not wanting to be their 'friend'. Great video
I got super confused yesterday when I let another student take a break and not give the critique she was supposed to give me on a project. The teacher said it was "really sweet" of me and I was like "what? I mean, clearly she's not feeling well enough to do it, so why should I expect her to? What's the usual norm in this situation? To force her to do it? Y'all are weird." 😂
@@aboycalledfishAgreed!
Oh when I try to be nice even if it is just because I can, it seems to be assumed to be because of some ulterior motive of some kind
@@RealAndromeda01 Agreed, this world works on manipulation. I have stopped being nice & grateful because I just don't believe it works anymore. Gratitude is give & take, not lifelong foot washing.
@@robertjohnburton9775this is only partly true. Between person to person who have a reason to care about each other, altruism and kindness do get you places and lead to people being truly comfortable around each other. Between a person and their boss, though, anything more than the bare minimum to not get canned is wasted effort, because that’s a relationship based on seeing how much they can exploit you. It’s about knowing context and the dynamics at play.
I’m torn because I absolutely believe what you are saying but it’s too painful having to participate in the real world knowing this.
Just hang on, things are changing in the supposed "real world" very quickly. What was meant by "the meek shall inherit the earth" is that the autistic people, (and those who support & understand them), animals, and plants shall inherit the earth
Take the blue pill 😝 (Matrix joke, not an incel joke)
We need to make an Autistic colony somewhere.
@@PossumMedic That's right! Incels prefer the red pill.
If the world we live in is the result of neuro typical majorities, it becomes obvious neuro typical doesn't mean happy, good or effective.
Perhaps the neurotypicals see us as deficient so they can feel a little bit better about themselves, with no effort on their part.
@@ingevankeirsbilck9601big part of their own copes yes
Neurotypical majority is basically “what feels natural” even if what feels “natural” to them doesn’t mean happy, good, or effective
Peer pressure and tradition aren’t inherently happy, good, or effective but it feels natural for a neurotypical person to be part of a group identity
@@typemasters2871 Indeed. I know of no other context in which being called 'typical' is a good thing xD
I agree with being wired for altruism. "Authentic Altruism" is a term I came across which describes being so in tune with what others need that you also know when it's best to NOT swoop in and help. Sometimes what people need is a very simple accommodation or a "yeah that sucks", but you cannot make someone stop feeling bad. I often get frustrated when people try to "save" me from a negative experience I'm going through. They are hurting me rather than helping me because I know that I just need to process the thing on my own and gain the wisdom from it. Instead, they make me feel like there's something wrong with me for wanting to sit in suffering. Suffering must be eliminated at all costs and has no positive benefit whatsoever for the NT world for some reason. And they call neurodiverse people emotionally insensitive? Smh.
Fun fact: apparently Buddhism is quite common among autistic people
Don’t tell other people what to believe in. Just because YOU believe in Christianity doesn’t mean Buddhist beliefs are wrong and yours are right. Keep your beliefs to yourself and leave others alone.
@@barrelrole If that stuff was right for everyone, reddit's r/atheism would never exist.
A few years ago I dislocated most of the bones in my left foot and the doctors were shocked by my X rays and told me that I would never be the same again. They said that I would be in constant pain for the rest of my life (not constant but at intervals everyday) and that I would never walk more than 5 miles in a day again (I now regularly do 5 miles and often do 10 in a day). I suffered profusely with the pain and some of the staff in the hospital were very cruel to me, I couldn't go out for months at a time and it was during a lockdown as well so I couldn't have visitors and food and supplies were just left at my door. I have never been in so much physical and psychological pain in my life but I would recommend the experience to anyone as it was the most enlightening and spiritual experience of my life. Eckhart Tolle asks: "What is good? And what is bad? Do you really know what is good for you and what is bad for you?"
Im autistic and faaaar from alturistic
Except that in psychology it’s very clear that people with autism have lowered levels of cognitive and emotional empathy, over a population basis.
I was diagnosed late after my son was diagnosed with autism. So I just spent my whole life not knowing why everyone seemed to have something wrong with them. I've never wanted to be like other people. In fact I stopped drinking tap water in case that was the reason. I've always wanted to find a way to help everyone because the way they are all living is just terrible and they don't even realise it. However, they always get angry whenever I make suggestions on how we all could live much happier lives. They really can't handle the thought of change even if the change would make everyone's lives better.
Thanks so much for this video. I am trying to learn at the age of 46 that I am not just a "failed" neurotypical and this video helps.
We’re so conditioned to believe the notion that “it’s society that’s wrong, not me” can’t be true because of how arrogant & narcissistic it sounds. But then I remember that 500 years ago, society believed the world was flat while one person said it wasn’t. And he was persecuted for it. But centuries later, he was proven right. So the idea that society is the problem and not me suddenly doesn’t seem so far fetched.
Galileo i think it was didnt say the earth was round. It was well known it was round then. He proposed heliocentrism, while the society he lived in believed in geocentrism
@@devindouzstuff_8250 you’re right. That’s what I was thinking of.
The divine right of kings was an unquestioned consensus truth for a looong time. It was also total bullshit.
There is a saying. The majority is wrong.
Yes and the same guy who said that doctors who worked with that bodies should wash their hands before they delivered babies because mother's kept dying and they didn't know why and the man who said they should wash their hands ended up being put insane at the end of his life Never given proper recognition for dropping mother mortality significantly From 20% to 2% Until modern society Basically Same with the guy who said that germs exist everyone's like oh OK there's tiny little bugs that crawl on everything that we can't see but they're there yeah Yeah sure! Oh and they make us sick too OK right But I lost he was right Same with the guy who realized everybody was getting sick because they We're drinking from a while that was contaminated with feces dead animals End god knows what else Problem is this is hard to know who is insane and who is correct until It's actually proven LOL
I love your delivery! Like a quality late 80s early 90s TV documentary back when people were addressed as intelligent beings.
I like that also. It seems nowadays people are very often addressed like how you would talk to a child. This is how the overall tone and mode of presentation frequently comes across. Of course it seems more grown people than ever are indeed childish and immature, but certainly not all of us.
We R
@@yearginclarkeindeed we r
@@yearginclarke It makes me wonder if dumbing down content came before dumbed-down people or as a result of it.
@@FlamingCockatiel Hmm good question...I'm guessing it's a result of it, based on my memory of how things were presented to people before the internet got really big. I was born in 1985, so I've seen a little bit of the evolution of this stuff from before the pre-digital era, though I'm not old enough to have the perspective like previous generations before mine would have. Roughly the last 15 to 20 years or so, is probably when things started changing the most noticeably.
The more I learn about neurotypicals and the world of lies they’ve created, the happier I am to not be one of them.
Why people like you exist?
I AM with you all.Thank you.
Same.
Amen.
RIGHT
I’ve not been tested or diagnosed as having ADHD and/or autism, but I’ve always been an outsider, even in my family.
I have trouble organizing my everyday life, but I’m known for my problem-solving skills. I can look at a problem and see a solution, even in a field I know little about.
I’m befuddled and sometimes shocked by people whose agendas I don’t understand. People who behave illogically are hard for me to deal with.
I cannot be bored, because I’m interested in everything, but sometimes, it’s lonely being different. This video all makes perfect sense to me. Thank you for de-pathologizing a way of being and thinking that is a gift, if you don’t try to force yourself to fit in. I’m 70, and I know that’s not happening.
Once people leave logic, I'm out of the conversation or the relationship.
How many of us were outsiders the last few years and were fine with it just saw through everything as the lies were so obvious
I'm just being diagnoses but I know I'm autistic. I am starting to get quite cross about the fact that we have to mask in order to make NTs feel comfortable when they dont make accommodations to make us feel comfortable.
Once of the main reasons I feel uncomfortable is that I just want to be nice and do things for its own sake, not for money or gratitude from others. I just want to be nice and I feel very hurt when other people don't act in a nice way. I don't understand why anyone would not act in a nice way and don't tell the truth, I get taken advantage of a lot because I look for the good in people and want to trust them. Now I don't trust anyone because I can't trust my own judgement so I have to not connect with anyone. That makes me really upset and depressed but the world is not a safe place so I just stay in my own little world that I can control and where I don't have to deal with people
stay away from leftist thought. The world is only great if you find an angle of specialty.
I NOW DO THESAME.
i feel exactly like u. i just isolate because the world is too inscrutable and scary
Yeah
As an autistic anthropologist I know it to be true that, since humans have moved away from nature there have been exquisitely sensitive people, who think holographically and empathetically, to live as emissaries and translators between worlds. Whether these people are labeled autistics, shamans, psychics, psychotics, animal communicators…is solely based on the culture in which these people find themselves.
This is such an interesting comment, i was just speaking with my eldest & saying - what if nuerodivergent’s have abilities that nuerotypicals don’t have. More senses, which is why nuerodivergents experience sensory overload
@@thesensoryshopnz7920I absolutely do. I've ALWAYS just known things. I wonder if that's common in other autistics?
I see details in nature that neurotypicals don't often see.
On another note. Do you think the great stone hand tool knapping breakthroughs by homo species most likely were made by neurodivergents? I was thinking about possible higher brain function in mathematics and geometry may have helped ?
I have said this years ago. We see the truth, the mess made around us, and we react against it. Others suffer it and try harder. We need autistics in charge of everything. ❤
🎯🎯🎯
Absolutely 👏🏻
I agree.
We need a variety of different minded people in charge together, autistic and non-autistic*
ftfy
@@dmgroberts5471"I'm autistic accept me, society is mean and we should be equal 😢😢😢"
"ok so everyone in charge should be autistic (exactly like me) to best fit mainly autistic interests/because I believe I am superior to neurotypicals"
?
I'm starting to realize the fact that I'm an anarchist has a lot more to do with the fact that I'm autistic than I initially thought...
I'm a neurotypical libertarian and I'm convinced that autists are overrepresented amongst anarchist and libertarians. I suspect this is due to them having had bad experiences with society and hierarchy in general combined with an ability to be self-sufficient. Weaponised autism is not just a joke meme off of 4chan.
Don't give away our secrets looool
@@FoenyxFeather Shit, you're right. next thing you know, they'll be calling it the autistic agenda!
Neurotypicunts, on the other hand, only like Anarchism for it’s aesthetics. It was either this or nothing, really.
@@SkoomaGodDovahkiin666 I think you're generalizing a bit too much, there...
Sadly, I think another problem is that autistics realize we don't measure up, whereas NTs are in denial about not measuring up. It doesn't make us immune to the pressure though.
Thanks! 💜
We can handle not living in denial.
But you DON'T measure up. Everything an autist can do, there is a neurotypical somewhere that can do it too. Autists can't do everything neurotypicals can do.
I don't look at it like that. You do measure up. NT's have a mind that very easily hooks into monitoring the cues in a social environment in lenses we don't peer through. Please don't devalue yourself. That's not a good thing, take it from someone who was devalued. The answer, I believe, lies in the world working its way to a point where we can own our own psychological and mental health issues better as a society, see through our own shame more, own our own shadows (everyone has them, Austistic people included. Just ask my parents who have apologized to us for shit moves during our childhood. And our whole family is Autistic or nuerodivergent.) A world where we can learn to love ourselves no matter what, and love each other the best we can too. A world where we grow the strength to love without making excuses.... but extend our vision of wisdom past the intense narratives of vengeful, black and white punishments we have now. Christianity, I personally feel, has had to evolve further in it's ways of interpretations, understandings, and applications in the world we currently live in since its conception. I haven't been Christian for over a decade.... I'm Wiccan now..... but I firmly feel that the inspiration of deep, merciful forgiveness was clearly onto something important and redemptive for a human need. Perhaps, while people may also choose Christianity or other religions to find some redemption for themselves..... we could also learn to redeem ourselves and each other better.... and handle correlating themes like Love, Justice, Balance, Consequences, constructive Discipline, Shame, Isolation, Fear, etc.... all themes that I think feel definitely might allow the negative, dictating, simplistic, fear based, and mob mentality narratives from toxic places.... places that are from hidden spaces that don't have our best interests at heart........ I feel that if humanity kept working towards a world which understood and promoted healthier systems that healed more mental health and helped people work through those themes better...... eventually less people will be in unhealthy mind states that leave them vulnerable to toxic mob mentality herding.
My theory is: nuerotypicals have a very socially linked mind that is very receptive to social influence and hierachy, and quicker to spread group think with each other, despite the other strengths that mind might provide to help glue our social world together the way we know it....... Or/and....... having the nuerotype shared by the majority of the population means that shitty dark narratives of this world and social manipulations will be rigged to hit nuerotypicals quicker as a group.
NT's are like a HIVE animal.
they can't function SOLO
@@richardsteiner45bro let people share relevant anecdotes
As far as I know, I am not autistic or neurodivergent. I want to say that this is one of the most incredible talks I have heard in a very long time. I am going to keep watching this channel
Thank you! We need allies like you.🙏❤️
I just envy being able to have random conversations that don’t implode.
I used to think as someone with aspergers that feeling like an outcast was lonely or a bad thing. Now I'm starting to realize it is more of a " neurotypical " type of problem.
Nice. I tried for Aspergers but all I got was boring ol autism and ADD. Thats a sweet diagnosis, they won't just give that one up.
aspergers is literally not even a diagnosis anymore and is subsumed into the "autism" umbrella. it's just another word for high functioning autism. @@OzymandiasWasRight
It's not.
Yes indeed 😮
✨✨✨✨SLAYYY!✨✨✨✨
The more you depend on others for validating your ideas, the less you reveal to others to try to 'maintain' your fake relationship with them.
Everyone is here to tell you their version of the 'right' way and if you deviate, you are judged to be bad. They expect you to be fake for you to be judged as 'good'.
Thanks for the video. Over the last year I have realised, how conned I was.
Getting diagnosed, has opened my eyes to the con. As I slowly learn more about myself I see the world with wonder
The other day. I was walking near an autistic counterpart who was stimming (in this instance rocking back) and whilst walking in a circle. I made sure to slow down and catch their eyes 👀 and say 👋 hello. They seemed so surprised that I was accepting them. Some else saw me do this and felt like talking to me too because they new that I would not judge them with malice ❤. No not I 😤. I have too much love and care no longer about being a “normal (not weird)”
I often ponder if NT people think "ND people are actually NT just really bad at it", not realising that no, we're ND all the way through
Definitely! I can say this because when I was undiagnosed for the first 47 years of my life, ‘passing’ for NT, this is precisely what I thought and believed!
Yes. That's exactly what most people think, they think we're just like them, except for being "scared" of social stuff. They don't realize that we have a whole different psychology.
This is exactly what we think. And why would we not? When 35 of every 36 experiences is with other neurotypicals, our experience of the world validates society's quasi-religious mantra that we're all the same. So, if everyone operates the same (which is what society and experience condition us to believe), the logical conclusion (logic is something that autists pride themselves on) would be that you are simply bad at being the same everyone else. This is a completely reasonable and logical conclusion given the assumed axioms.
What percentage of the population do you think have any knowledge of what neurotypes are and that there are a variety of them? Blaming neurotypicals for their completely reasonable behaviour given the statistics and awareness is not going to get the outcome you are looking for.
@@robokill387and different neurology.
@@robokill387You’re painting all of a group in a broad brush while not wanting to be painted with a broad brush. I have been around people with numerous disabilities my whole life. It’s very easy for me to get along with people who have autism, and find ways to connect with them. However, I’d say it’s an undeniable deficiency that almost none of them can look me in the eye, gauge the nuances of why I’m saying something to them, they struggle to psychoanalyze others, are so literal that useful metaphorical language and ideas can go right over their head. Instead of getting upset and blaming “society” which does absolutely nothing, realize each person has strengths and deficiencies. Simple as that. I have adhd, and sure if I lived in a tribe I would probably not notice it, but I don’t live in a tribe, I’m connected to society. Therefore it’s important for me to understand how to use the helpful aspects of adhd, and cope with the difficulties it causes as well. I don’t blame society, or others.
I became a therapist ( not psychological )and absolutely loved it ,
After 17 years & treating sooo many people including medical professionals, I can say that a lot more people are on our wavelength than you can imagine .
I know a lot of people mask , hide , ignore and deny their non neurotypical ways .
Most of us are just winging it .
Even the celebs we see who have it all together .
More and more, I'm thinking that the difference between us and NTs is mostly that they can't feel the weight of it all.
We see everything they choose to stay blind to.
@@kaden-sd6vb Yes we see it, they don't. Not sure that they've gone out of their way though. Privilege creates blindspots.
@@klavczarkalafan4191 it probably varies.
@@kaden-sd6vb Good point
They do, it's more a stupid vs smart/intelligent issue.
If autistics outnumbered neurotypicals, we’d be the ones called neurotypical.
This is my self talk all day everyday since diagnosis earlier this year. Typicals try and “help” me but all that masking just makes me neurotic. Being authentically myself freaks out the typicals but gives me my sanity back.
I was locked up in a hospital for a week ending Christmas day and treated like a criminal since I didn't fit. Through my life I struggled to understand myself and constantly felt inadequate. Everything I achieved needed more effort than others. I didn't receive any help I needed at a younger age and it meant I had to pretend to act "normal". Well I ended up being very successful in many ways. We aren't lesser at all. If anything we are more.
Wow I’m so happy that I watched this. I don’t know if I’m autistic and I will never know but I refuse to wear a mask. But the last time I struggled so hard with everything and everyone because I was so honest about it. I felt so alone because everyone seemed to be so in control and thinking differenttly. I have strong sense of justice and so many things that are happening in front of me are really hard to ignore. I felt so lonely and still do because I think completely different. Maybe it’s something else but this video spoke to me in a different way. It’s really hard for me to connect to people ( they connect with me but I do not with them) and I always think something is wrong with me and I copy the behavior of normal people, maybe I will be more happier. But this video showed me that maybe they are wrong. So thank u 🙏🏽❤
Lots of non-autistic ppl refused to mask too. You make the same error many of them do by simply generalizing others based off you’re own person.
It's funny to me how many NT people I've met who think all autistic people are the same.
A lot of them genuinely don't seem to understand that we are unique people with a unique personality outside of our autism.
I blame a lack of education. I had to go out of my way to learn more about autism. No school teaches about this
@@Muhluriand lack of empathy they just want us gone. Cause we scare, we bore them, we emotionally tax them, and we remind them their worst insecurities about themselves
That's because NTs tend to stereotype those who are different, due to their xenophobia and conformity.
3:25 "...society doesn't handle difference well." I laughed out a tear at this massive understatement.
Another interesting example of this is the game we happy few. It's a very interesting game:).
I have never realy tried to be "normal" and now im trying to let myself relax and do the things that i enjoy and give me comfort.
These last few month's i have noticed that i never realy feel at ease when im home with my parent's. Like i have been low key masking at home aswell. They only place i feel compleetly relaxed is when im with my fiance:). He has diagnosed autism and we can just be our weirdest self around eachother:).
I like the way you think and how you presented this~ I never thought of things that way. I self-identify as autistic as it explains everything I've known, felt, and experienced in my life. Few believe me when I say it, but fellow autistics always say, "Well, Duh." Life's been rough and I nearly lost myself many times, but now I'm living my best life because I finally embraced all that I am. I wish more people could see neurodivergent souls the we way we do~ The neurotypical are often mind-boggling to me!
I had a bpd diagnosis a while back and few days ago my docs told me i am on the autism spectrum and I cried so bad cause i finally understood why its so difficult and exhausting to "fit in" my mind has become absolutely ill stressing over why people hated me so much? why is it so hurtful to deal with "normal" "healthy" people they are so mean? why this "normal" behavior seems so wrong? well my brain is just wired different and ive been conned. i do not need to fit in, theres no real need for me to act as someone im not. My happiness lies in small things and its okay that im not chasing after great things like "normal" people do. I am not normal, i will never be, i am in fact different and that does not mean i dont deserve respect or to be treated like a human being. The people who are close to me love me so much! my heart is definitely in the right place and that is all that matters to me! ❤
"they wear a facade of competence, confidence, contentment and control"
are you telling me everybody masks?
Yes. It just comes more naturally to them. Often even unaware
@@keylanoslokj1806 just speak for yourself. You’re generalizations of others is worse than anything the “typical” folks have put you through. Wait, am I not allowed to say that because I don’t know you? Hmm.
@@jacksonrelaxin3425 what colour is your Bugatti
You're comparing apples and pears
@@jacksonrelaxin3425lol not worse, what a laugh 😂
We don’t lie to ourselves like they do and when we tell them unwanted truths it shatters their comfortable lies.
I imagined Whinny the Pooh telling me this before I was going to bed and it was very comforting.
I know that this video is two years old, but it just popped up in my feed today, and I am so very glad it did. Just honestly really needed to hear this right now. Thank you.
I think this also applies to those who were labeled "bipolar" when it was in fashion. Anything to suppress truth tellers I guess. We are in fact, the biggest threat to the status quo. Great video, thank you!
This is so true . Nature is just perfect as it is , neurodivergents are actually truer, more authentic and honest . To me these are so valuable quality and I am still hoping to find more and more people that are neurodivergent. Neurotypical people are often flat and experience some empathy but rarely dare to fully love and defend and put truth above their ego unless they are very very wise and brave to be vulnerable and take the risk of being avoided.
Thanks so much for this great video statement! I was only recently diagnosed and have been fighting the system for 50+ years. Now I have blissfully stopped playing the game!
The overlap between my personality disorder(BPD) and Autism is uncanny. We have so many of the same traits but then we are overloaded by our emotions and our inability to shut down the hateful voices from our past that are constantly standing behind us, reminding us of why we have no friends. Its like having a demon twin, that is always there, that weirdly looks out for us because without us, it wouldnt exist but often does more harm than good. I can be myself but only when others arent present. The disorder creates *roles* that are expected of me depending on the group I am in. During the pandemic, a lot of those roles got shattered and my true self emerged. It scared the people in my peer group, they thought I was having a Mental Breakdown. That's when I realised, that the people that had known me for decades, had NEVER really known me at all. Only their projection of who I was. It reminded me of this alignment I created for a D and D campagin, ages ago called NIL. Nil is neither good nor bad, it is what people expect to see. So someone looking at you thinking you are wicked will see an evil alignment and someone else looking expecting you to be noble, will see a good alignment and someone who doesnt think you are either one, will see a rainbow of constantly moving, often clashing colours because I am neither and both all at the same time.
Best thing I have found with The Tism is "Disipline, responsibility, and never using the word deficient" in regards to the diagnosis. Positive motivation and consistency is key. My sons school that specializes in Children with Autism hasn't been able to teach my son to spell or read, 3 weekends of him and I 1 on 1 working, and he is finally excited and positive about his learning, and making progress. Never let the diagnosis shape your future. My son also has pushed past his sensory issues, and is experimenting with new cloths rather then tanktop, and shorts all the time. So proud of him ❤️ ❤❤😊
I know a young lady who is autistic. Her biggest challenge is getting away from her mother who has declared herself her daughter's savior. Poor girl is 30 years old and being guilted into living at home because her mothers attachment issues.
Amazing video. Here we are telling the our truth. Congratulations for your amazing channel and for your words full of wisdom!
You call it a dreamworld i call it group psychosis.
I feel this deep in my soul.
It took me years to realise interactions with others were transactional, not everyone is happy for you when you win & the vast majority of ppl are compliant.
As RFKennedy Jr put it, 'no one's ever complied their way out of totalitarianism'
THANK YOU so much, for this.
Thank you so much for this video. Being autistic myself, I genuinely feel sorry for neurotypicals. It must be Hell for these people, worrying about their place in the "hierarchies" they apparently believe in.
I don't know if it's entirely (an admitted) hell for them. I think it gives them a sense of security which is why they hate or fear people who disrupt it.
Frankly, if we keep on talking about our differences making us so much better than each like you just did. I don't want to live in your Society either.
@@katalinmigray2527it’s absolutely understandable for a person to want to avoid the disquieting truth that the bedrock they think most societal systems were built on was sand the whole time and the contractors were embezzling the construction funds the whole time too. Suddenly being aware of how precarious, artificial, counterproductively designed, and in some cases malicious the world you live in is bad enough, but knowing it only continues to exist as such because everyone’s been convinced by the perverse system’s beneficiaries to buy in and clap if they believe is in some cases a thing that hits more personally.
@@SoullessAIMusicDo whatever tf you want. Neurotypicals bullied and marginalised us all our lives. Often with immense pleasure. So we will call out their very many vices all we want. Also perfect utopia will never exist cause no two brains are the same and people are selfish
I'm autistic, but I've always seen this more as an issue of right-wing thinking, particularly its emphasis on capitalism and hierarchies- you'll see that everyone has their own "rightful place", that people should "live within their means", that those who can't operate within their society are inherently inferior and deserve the bottom rung- indeed, that those who are at the top got there solely because they worked hard and were more deserving of it, even when that is provably false.
I am seeing a bit of the autistic/allistic division in there, but that doesn't seem to be all there is to it.
I couldn't agree more. As a non-neurotypical person, I have come to believe that we on the spectrum are the more normal ones, while the so-called "neurotypical" are the ones with the condition.
YEA
Thank you for your video, I identify greatly with it as a fellow Autistic. I haven't been called unemphatic but I have been told many times that I'm intimidating because I have resting bitch face when I'm not masking for others. Also, thank you for not medicalizing us. That also means a lot to me.
I’ve always had a large degree of respect for autistic friends.
Why is that?
Society is too confusing too complicated and being autistic self diagnosed right now getting tested in July I find this video perfect because it describes what I have gone through and what I’ve tried to do with trying to be like any of the Nuro typical‘s and becoming burned out many times over my entire life and still not being able to figure out anything and never function normally in school or being able to make it maintain friendships mostly maintaining unable to but I am married now have been for the last 21 years and I still get confused with things that my wife does but I love her anyways and no one seems to understand when it comes down to keeping the house clean and other things that I can only handle so much a day and with pretty much taking care of my wife completely because she is in a power wheelchair with limited use of her hands and she can’t bear weight I do everything to take care of her and then when I’m done doing all that and keeping track of all the steps I’m usually wore out afterwards to where I have to sit and relax and find something that makes me feel good and recharge my own batteries then I can try and work on getting other stuff done but I also have to deal with sounds light textures and other things that annoy the living daylights out of me thank you for reading this message I greatly appreciate it
Two months ago, at the age of 45, I was unexpectedly diagnosed as autistic. The news was shocking. Interestingly, when explaining my experience to others, I often use the analogy of being ‘unplugged from the Matrix’. This vividly captures the sensation I felt then and continue to feel now. Good video, worth a follow!
When I was diagnosed with (Aspergers at the time) it in my early 20s it came more as a relief. Here I had these shared experiences with so many people. My anti-orthodox ways of thinking wasn’t a deficiency. I may have struggled to learn like the other kids, but once I got something I held onto it a lot better. I don’t see one as better than the other (neurotypical vs autistic), i do think both benefit from the other.
Although one thing that as an autistic I did view as transactional or at least a two-way street was respect. That one I know I came up with myself because one of the two people who you learn from first (your parents) was annoyed when I didn’t unconditionally show her respect regardless of whether or not she gave me enough respect to treat me as more than a series of assets because of what I could give her.
I just wish I could opt out of the society entirely without losing the basic needs of living and just being able to exist comfortably where I am
Well can’t u? (It’s genuinely unfortunate if u can’t)
@@Americanamaya I’m pretty sure no one can, yknow capitalism and all that. (I say this in good faith, I hope you’re doing well fellow human)
This is brilliant! This is an amazing video that for the most part saved my life. at the minimum I think it definitely stopped my descent into despair and depression and with that halted I was able to get a foothold in my mind to deal with my recent diagnosis of Asperger syndrome, which happened a couple of months ago at age 54. First two things I learned after my diagnosis was that the life expectancy for us was 54 and that the leading cause of death was suicide and although it was a cold pill to swallow it didn’t surprise me at all. this is an amazing piece of work and the message is extremely relevant and profound. I think one day it’ll be cannon for people like us. You were in an incredible zone when you came up with this one because its an important message both meaningful and relevant. It’s definitely something I needed to hear. I watch this video regularly almost have it memorized. I thank you for writing it and more importantly for sharing it.
How do I like a video more than once?
I wish you could Bob😂
@@Autistamaticme too
simply amazing, thanks for the support, we need this so much.
It’s always such a good feeling watching videos from other autistic people and just feeling understood and being able to say “WOAH I’m the same way!” One of those things where it’s like “Well duh no one is every alone in the universe” but still I smile and get this feeling of “There are other people who understand”
I feel like I often times forget just how manipulative the world of NTs is, really makes me appreciate being autistic. The fact that these people are wired to think so strategically about something as simple as existing in a human space is wild. Also strange who people seem to value this idea of being “true to yourself” and having honestly and yet us autistic people are othered by society simply for seeing no point in trying to flatter or deceive. Why should I want to hide things from others? I don’t need people to love a facade, I need them to love me.
Great video and an important message! I definitely needed to hear it myself. I have been conned!
I am Autistic and I have never given it that much thought. I run my life and I do not care what people think. I remember having to break in my teachers in grade school. They fought me for a week or two, then they let me go because they knew I would do all my work at my pace...not theirs!!! And they watched me to see how doing it my way worked out. In 12 years of school I was never told to sit in the hall, and I never went to the principals office. I was trusted by all my teachers, because as you pointed out,,, We don't lie, cheat, or steal!!! Today, I am living in the middle of nowhere in The Comanche Nation!!! Apache Indians help rid my 4 acres of Diamondback Rattlesnakes, and I collect Crow, and Hopi art as my life's hobby of living in a museum. "The Addams family house if you will!!!" So, for many Aspergers syndrome comes with social constraints. Not for me!!! Brother James Kendall Moore OSB OFS OSC
❤. Continued blessing to you ❤
what’s OSB OFS OSC?
i lie, cheat and steal
Bless you.
I've always thought this, putting people on a spectrum and calling them disabled or labelled as something wrong, just because they think differently to the supposed normal. I've always found this very disturbing with society. The autistic people I've known have been very smart, loving and kind and you wouldn't be able to tell. That is supposed to be disabled? I know with the spectrum so vast some have difficulty getting dressed etc, but then at the other end there are people who i know, where you couldn't tell and just think different. The Vastness of the spectrum is what disturbs me. its like it now encompasses any so called outliers
I don't think I''m autistic but this really resonated with me. Bravo sir
“There’s autistic people who think that neurotypical people are all happier than them. Have dozens of friends and perfect romantic relationships. The lack of these drives their anxiety and depression.”
This was so good. Thanks for sharing!
Will be supporting your channel from now on, thank you
Thanks for your comment and support.
The first part of truth is the realisation that you don’t have to “fit in”. The second part of truth is understanding that you have the choice in how you think and therefore feel in any given moment. Neurotypical and victim people are offended by this statement and that’s fine. It’s definitely harder for certain people like those who have autistic tendencies. I am one of these but have changed my world by slowing the world to my pace, and reprogramming my mind to the present. Learning self love is the bedrock of all of this and that only comes with loving everything else. Even the manipulators. I was then able to accept and enjoy who I am and move into a content mindset. Autistic people should understand they actually have a head start over others for the very reason that they don’t fit the neurotypical profile. In other words they are more free from societal programming. Love to all ❤
Someone who must tell the truth will always be hated in a world built on lies and deception.
I always say, “yeah, I’m disabled. Disabled by society, not my brain. My brain is fine.”
Very accurate summary of our beautifully unique attributes. A good reminder when life feels too tough. 😌 thank you
The term "neuro-typical" is a real problem. This conversation can not evolve until that term is dealt with and by dealt with, I mean thrown away into the abyss forever and replaced by something that actually describes something valid. The language used can erect blockades and that term erected one a mile high which is why someone came up with it in the first place. The language is created before the argument happens, thus pre-deciding the winner of the argument. "Neuro-typical" has no validity as a scientific term whatsoever. What the hell is typical? There is certainly no definition for that. I'm not even disagreeing with your general points, I actually agree with you on most things, I just have an issue with that term that calls me "neuro typical." I'd be interested in hearing your thoughts on this. Great video. Very nicely presented.
I can only recommend the show called Daria. Daria is autistic in a neurotypical world. Well, Idk if there is an official statement that says Daria is autistic, but so many autistic women could resonate with her, that she was on the profile picture of the r/autisminwomen subreddit.
NT: "Hi, how are you?"
...
**Cranks abnormally enormous resource hungry engine in brain**
**Attempts to forsee each outcome of all possible answers**
**Fighting urge to vent how youve spent your entire life in near hell where socialising is an almost impossible task which is just expected of you everyday along side trying not to be repulsed by other sensory overloads simultaneously**
I remember hearing somewhere else, that the issue isnt that we are sick. Rather the world we live in is sick. Which makes a hell of a lot of sense cause theres so much that makes 0 logical sense. And thanks to all this it feels like living in a parallel world all the time. Including with the way our brains work. It provides me that ability to look in from the outside and spot things others cant or refuse to see. But it also means always being seperate. I can get close to the same track but forever cursed to ride the rail to the side. Or as one of my favorite quotes from Monk. "Its a gift! And a curse!"
I absolutely love your videos! I'm 34 and was diagnosed this year ✨
When my mother was young, she worked at a summer camp for the mentally disabled. There she met a guy who was older than her, but was said to have the mental capacity of an infant.
The guy got interested in a football once and my mother decided to teach him how to play. Every other person working there was skeptical, they thought there was no point in teaching him because he wouldn't be able to learn. Guess what? He learned very quickly.
I bet if people had always treated him as someone with potential, he wouldn't have even been on that camp.
I think we have to remember that we're all human. As social animals, we fare better if we have diversity in our pack. Someone has to remember what the consensus is, and we don't really care for social norms. Someone has to innovate, and they're afraid of the unknown. Everyone serves a purpose.
I love this channel and thank you! I sat and cried because of how close to home this was/is.... I only found out this year that this was what has been sold to us (and others) and I was scammed. It's given me a new lease of life.
As an autist that was not diagnosed as a child, life has been really crazy and traumatic. I had to find out many things discussed on here by myself with no assistance. I began suspecting I had autism around 10 years old when my parents and I moved away from our family's location and I had to meet a whole new network of people. I stood out like a sore thumb and was reprimanded heavily both internally and externally due to my social solitude. Later on, other autists began to be born into my family. It was a sign to me, that probably I am. I have yet to get diagnosed, as I do not hold trust in the medical industry of my country. The last thing I want is to try to force myself to plug into the system with the use of a pill.
The best part of this video and the comments about it, for me, is knowing I'm not alone i being a congenital truth teller and truth seeker, and that I'm not alone feeling like I'm outside the social status system, and I'm totally cool with that. I think I'm finally finding the tribe I didn't know I had, and it's a great feeling!
As someone with ADHD, I don’t relate to all of this, but man do I relate to a lot of it. I utterly despise the social game that the world plays and the older I get, the more I realize that I’m not the only one who doesn’t have it all together - I just can’t hide it like they can. Thanks a lot for this video. Honestly has helped me shift my view of myself and my place in society in a positive way.
I was thrown out of an organisation that didn't like me.
It was a charity that provided a paid-for service.
I asked a lot of direct questions and I noted different answers or no answers from different members of staff.
I questioned this. They didn't like it.
I also had a couple of meltdowns/breakdowns, mainly due to my beloved dad passing away (whilst I was with this organisation.)
They immediately suspended me. I attended a meeting with them supported by an advocate. They lied to me and said they'd seek support for me so I could continue to use their services, but with appropriate support.
They never did this.
We wrote to them, asking them about everything they said at the meeting but didn't do, emphasising all they caimed that they would do to help support me to continue to attend.
I received a terse reply telling me they'll have no further contact with me.
That's how we get treated.
I have many other examples too, unfortunately.
I haven't been diagnosed with autism but every one of these videos holds something relatable to me and helps my life make sense, so thank you.
You're amazing. I really miss you since I left Twitter. On mastodon now with a wonderful autistic community. You were there for me when nobody else was.
As a mum and auntie of neuro spicy people, I often make the case that humanity is very spicy. Labelling people, including ourselves, has become an obsession. A bad one. Every person is a universe, and we should take joy in self discovery and gaining understanding of each other. Also think the Western Anglo civilisation is more "neurotypical" in how it's set up and driven, than most other ethnic groups. Eastern Europeans especially, and Latinos that I'm well aquainted with, are definitely more neurospicy, as are the cultures.
Eastern Asian cultures are far worse.
"Neuro spicy" I love it!😂😂
@@PretendingToBeAHumanIs a psychopathic serial killer, or serial abuser, or a leech politician, the exact same with an altruistic productive empath? Noz or course people have to be judged and compared to a degree
✨🔥💖🔥✨
For me it's the truth and justice... Even children are raised to be honest and fair, but as soon as we become adults it's all manner of deceit.
I could never be on code... Everything is just a mess and I'm called weird bc I call it out and am genuinely just beside myself w the illusions and delusions people call "normal".