It's kind of ironic that narcissists don't like being alone. Their behaviour pushes everyone away, and their social self is parroting whatever keeps people under their control. Being alone is the one time you get to be real without anyone else's influence. If they could get through the self-hate, they could start the shadow work and improve themselves.
It would destroy them if they would look deep into themselves. They won´t do that. Therefore they always look for company. Loneliness is the worst for them and they don´t like it.
@@RUclipsPremium-hj9jh They feed off of the emotional responses of others. They need massive amounts of validation and affirmation and have to sell illusions to unsuspecting people because they KNOW who they are and how they feel. I will never forget that when my ex husband abandoned me with a 2 yr old and 3 month old and pregnant with our third, I was taken to find him to tell him I was going to the hospital for delivery. Do you know where he was...? Standing outside at a gas station with a cup of coffee and a cigarette, staring off into space. He was renting a trailer, so why would he be standing outside at 11 o'clock at night? Just to be around people. He had fully expected me and the kids to move in with him, but I knew the area he was moving into was drug-infested and his shadow self was calling him again and the only reason he wanted me to come was to be company and bring my food stamps and cleaning and organization supply to brighten the place up. No sauce.
We can’t even fathom the strongholds on them. It’s the hardest thing they’ll ever have to probably do. To confront themselves is terrifying for them. The pain and confusion is unbearable. Now I understand why my Narc was so worried and would say he was never going to go to heaven. That God just can’t forgiven for everything they’ve done and destroyed it’s hard to know deep down inside you have lied and manipulated and used people. Hurt so many. Idk but I truly believe their only salvation in life, mind, spirit and physically (because they do get physically sick too) is God and therapy. However, the stronghold is real and one many of us can’t even wrap our heads around it. They aren’t just broken they are shattered. Imagine trying to put yourself together when your broken but shattered that’s even harder. I love the song “in the name of Jesus” by Katy Nichole because that’s all I feel that we can do at this point. Just sayin.
At least we can deal with it. Somewhat. They would self-destruct. I can entertain myself for decades, learn stuff. I'm an interesting person. I like me
His awareness of his toxicity and ability to check himself and adjust the behavior is amazing. I comment him for that 💯. I wish my mom was able to do that 😔
I hear what you are saying Lee. But so many victims of their abuse end up way more damaged and ruined than narcs. And they didn't deserve or instigate the abuse. And some take their lives. So i hear what you are saying about the loneliness of a narcissist. But narcs still come out on top in pur society. Especially if they are men. I wish it wasnt like that, but it is. I do appreciate what you are doing. There will be fewer people abused and fooled by narcs because of your work.
Hey, I found your channel today. I wanted to say, I have mad respect dude. After being diagnosed you stepped up, to not only do better and become better, but ti raise awareness and help others. Mad respect for the strength of character you have as your own person, and I wish you the best in life. NPD has affected so many people, my sister and I are still recovering from being raised in the environment.
I’m happier on my own…the peace is wonderful! I learned to enjoy it because as a child I was constantly sent to my room…for punishment…for breathing usually..
With social media age, narc is never alone. I was shock to find out... They have a 'relationship' with their internet or mobile phone...watching porn the whole day, everyday !!!
My ex husband was dangerous to my daughter. He deliberately punished me through her by perpetuating my childhood trauma on her and then had the nerve to still "pray for us to come back" and when I did (but THIS time as a SIGMA empath 💪🏾) to see if he had truly changed, he only did the exact same thing I'd left him for. When he committed suicide, I know it was his last act of revenge by never paying me my child support or telling me what he'd done to my daughter, but he will now have to pay for it ♾️ for infinity now, the exact way he suffered for it on earth...And all because he wouldn't change his manipulative ways and acknowledge that he wouldn't have lost me and the kids if he had listened to me when I tried to tell him that he was making bad choices for us all when I put myself in his hands. 🤷🏾♀️
@@susanjeffay3851 I thank you for your kind words ma'am. I am so glad he is not here anymore. I still have some intense hatred flashes because it's only been a year ago but I thank God that we are all doing the best that we can.
@@RUclipsPremium-hj9jh I appreciate your empathy and I can feel that you are trying to work out in your mind your own experience. It is of the utmost importance to understood that these people are leeches who constantly seek to feed off of patience, kindness and support without doing any sort of internal adjusting. In their minds they have a trauma pass to simply find someone who will love them by accepting them in a continual state of decrepitude, and true love simply cannot stand to allow a partner to remain in a state that they cannot stand to even be in themselves. But that is exactly what they are asking of you, thus the confusion and misery. They are trying to make a strong person adjust their strength to help them feel assured that they will never be shed off as dead weight by manipulative tactics that batter your mind and morals. Being able to feel someone's pain does NOT make it your responsibility to fix it. Just as you carry pain and still have love to give, you must accept that THEY are required to bear their own scars, and they should stay away from people if they are not committed to the lifelong process of becoming the best version of themselves that does not allow them to hurt others as punishment for not being willing to address their dangerous, unhealthy behaviors. It is simply unimaginable, the lengths these people will go through to avoid being responsible for themselves, and it is extremely devastating to know that they are capable of extremely vindictive revenge on those who simply tried to help, but refused to be held hostage to their willful illness. We cannot change what happened, but we can REFUSE to allow them to continue mistreating our support for a single second longer.
They hate being alone…. Whereas I’m a loner. It would drain me of my energy to give him attention 24/7 cause he didn’t know how to entertain himself or have any good hobbies. They always want to distract themselves in one way or another. We all distract ourselves with something, but always depending on other people for your happiness doesn’t do much in the long run. They can’t be alone for very long, something has to feed their ego or validate them in some way or another. Someone to distract them from themselves.
@@TheExtrovertedHermit wow. Literal thinking much? These people become that way because of being excluded early in life If your response is always to banish before attempting to comprehend, which is typically American by the way lmao, more of them will become full fledged monsters.
Thank you for stating the truth. Unlike most RUclipsrs, you've said what actually I've noticed in real life. Most Narcissists are married, successful with children. It's the Narc victims' lives that are ruined. Nobody said life is fair. 😔
Thank you for beeing so honest and authentic. Today I gave the selflove journal to my son, because he had birthday two weeks ago. I did'nt know how he would react. He was very pleased and he emphasized that he likes the presantion and that he will use it. Thank you ❤🙏 Today was Jacob (James)1,12 in my bible app 🌿📖⚘️ .I suggest we all know these feelings of lonelyness and pain in our healing process but as we see by your example and many others who are on this way it is worth to endure these times for the reward of a new life. May the Lord help us and be at our side.❤🙏
You're my favourite narcissist, Lee! Thank you so much for the work you've been doing! It gives me so much more perspective in dealing with a narcissist! 🙏🏼🧡
This man has truly cracked the code, by admitting to himself and others and literally the whole world, he helps other people both unknown to him and loved by him by validating their experiences all the while gaining his supply which he still needs in the healthiest way from supportive comments here and family and friends. Truly a win win case he has built for himself and for the world I could not be more happy that this man has found the help he deserves 🌻 👍 Keep up the amazing inner strength you have and spread the word 🌺 you will never be lonely so long as you have hope.
Hi Lee , my brother who is a narc plays video games ALL night he makes soo much noise and talks so loud . Now i understand why they cant be alone and do nothing at the same time
My ex mother in law is always ripping and running and it was clear she was running away from her own wickedness. Unlike you, she was pure evil. I have never met anyone as cruel. To this day, damn near 70 and can never sit down. It's sad and disturbing (MJW).
Hello, new to your channel. I am about a month out of a narcissistic (relationship?). It definitely ended with a bang. He brutally attacked me, and then tried to kill us both by smashing my new car into not one, but two cars while speeding over 100 miles an hour. I still feel numb. I knew about narcissism-it’s a word you hear all the time -but not that the snap could be so instant, so dangerous. I should have seen it coming. For all of you watching, when he says narcissists can be dangerous, believe him. I’ve been watching your videos for the past few days, and it’s like hearing things from his point of view. You’ve helped me put the pieces together and step out of this fog of confusion. Only wish I’d listened sooner. Thank you.
My field of study was abnormal psychology & criminology. You'd think I'd be smart enough to NOT try to have a good relationship with a narcissistic sibling. I KNEW she was/is & maybe my arrogance made me think we CUD. Well, it sure didn't take long to need to run away. Thx for putting info out there & doing what you can to help yourself, too. Wishing you the best
Our egos make us think that our particular loving, patient, and empathetic nature despite trauma of some sort cannot help BUT change the narcissistic people that we encounter. (I tried that with my sister and she nearly drove me into a mental breakdown.) But the sort of love that narcissists need is a mixture of both parental love, where we love them like children we birthed, and unconditional love, which only God can give. However, even parents and God require that they stop doing and thinking selfish, abusive acts and thoughts that keep them getting into trouble that they have to be bailed out of. They cannot repent or be truly remorseful because in their minds, they cannot move on past the wounds that affected them like we empaths did, and they are only doing what it takes to survive because nobody understands how wretched they truly feel and think. I'm glad you understood finally that no contact is the only way to go with an unrepentant, unremorseful and actively self-consumed sibling who truly lacks the capability to accept that she cannot be good or feel better or worthy just by standing next to you-she simply must desire to accept that she must want to change her thoughts and ways. God bless you and congratulations on your achievements and accomplishments!
Yes!!!! Absolutely!!! We are NEVER alone!!! Not for one single moment, even if we truly think we are. Our Abba Father LORD God, our Saviour Jesus Christ, and His Holy Spirit are constantly with us, no matter how we feel. That is sooooo reassuring... 💖💖💖🙏🙏🙏
My exBoyfriend is an alcoholic and addicted to 2 meds he buys on the street. Last I heard he was alone with his elderly mother complaining to her that she was the only person he had left to talk to him. He should have thought about how he was going to be alone again when he treated me like garbage and lied to me. I really am a ride or die kind of partner. I stuck out a bad marriage for 30 years. Yet that man managed to drive me off after only 2 months of living with him. Either I learned my lesson or he’s just that bad. Maybe a combo of both.
I’ve left my narc husband almost 2 months ago now. I seen him 1 week ago at a funeral and he did not look good. He’s walking around like he’s ok but clearly it shows he’s not…. You can tell that he’s struggling mentally. Kinda sad…
Good Lord, PLEASE watch out for yourself. 🙏 He knew you would probably see him and he is very likely plotting on how to get back to you. What you saw was the parasite without the host. They cannot live without someone to drain of money, energy, attention and time--MEAT. He is in the stages of narcissistic collapse, where he cannot validate that he is good and acceptable anymore because you are not THERE to shield him from his delusions and folly now. They will seek the easy path of getting back to the host, like the demons that come back and bring 7 more when they are cast out of a person and then allowed back in when they don't find anyone else to house them adequately. PLEASE if you believe in God or karma, let him experience the full rain of the consequences of abusing you. You may not know it, but the only reason he even thought he was ok and had escaped answering for his abuse was because you, with your wonderful patient self, were shielding him from what he deserved as an ☔ umbrella. All of what he had coming to him was covering and defiling YOU, ma'am. Now that you are gone, he is finally getting that he had no right to mistreat you. Watch out for those calls and texts. Watch out for the messages from people about how bad off his condition is. Beware of his pleas to you to take him back, "if you are such a good person" or "if you ever loved him." Your love was never missing. HIS was. Continue to stay separated from him so that you can fully process what kept you there so that you never harbor the enemy out of a mistaken sense of duty, honor, nobility, or moral obligation EVER AGAIN.
So whether someone is ok with being alone or not shows you if they are narcissist or not. Thank you. This is very helpful, since narcissists are well known to gaslight & project. Many accuse their victim as the narcissist. Some may even mistakenly believe their victim to be the narcissist. When this happens it can cause much confusion & doubt in the well intentioned victims mind. If that was ever you or even is you currently , well now you know.
Mine was addicted to an on-line video game/world. He said he would play for days on end. This was his way of getting what he needed and avoiding suffering.
We cannot even fathom what happens to them in their minds when they fail at yet another relationship. Once I realized how truly ill my ex was and I do believe he still is, I could only imagine when he was alone in his home and the chatter would start in his being. His poor family (siblings) he would call them and have them on pins in needles to the point that they would think to drive like 3.5 hours to him. He’d have them on the phone till they could calm him down. What’s truly sad about narcs is that the family don’t do what I think should be attempted. An intervention! Yup and intervention. Where everyone (siblings & their children) meet with that Narc and tell them they are not leaving until he goes with them to sign up for therapy. Period! I think it’s the last resort when that Narc is and has almost but destroyed their lives and the lives of others and worse will continue to hurt more people (new supply). Nah as a family member I would refuse for them to continue to hurt other women and especially if the family are Christian believers. We are to go to them and set the record straight and help them. Ok if they don’t go to each person they’ve harmed and confess and ask to be forgiven and continue therapy then that’s it. Now it’s totally between that Narc and God. But as family and believers we have to try to get to the bottom of their lies and manipulation and confront them head on. Just my opinion because the Bible says to go to them and co front them. Just saying
Thanks Lee. You have greatly assisted me with understanding and seeing the clarity through the psychological abuse I have experienced with my narcissistic/psychotic wife.
When I'm alone, I feel like all my thoughts drown me too. Idk if that is just a narcissistic trait . All my anger at my Nex boils over in my head and I go to the gym to thug that shii out before I do or say something I regret.
Right…. They always say they want to be left alone or they want peace in their lives, like as if they aren’t the contributing factor to their madness. While saying they want peace and to be left alone they have to be engaged with others. I’ve seen them engage with people they claim they don’t care for just to be around someone… Narcs are weird and they’re reasoning for their actions almost NEVER make sense to NOBODY but THEMSELVES!!!
They have backups for backups. I didnt understand how deep it went, but now as a male, i will never date a woman that dont have friends from the same gender. I found out my ex didnt have 1 girlfriend, why? Since teenage years she has been the one taking her friends boyfriends or sleeping with them, it happened to her once as an act of revenge from another girl, thats when she lost her mind, like, how can someone do this to her? But when she have done it all her life, thats ok to be overlooked. These demons dont work on logic, they are weak predators who can only feel strong by deceit, a head on fight is what a narc hates the most
right! or they arent real ones! or they always hit you with the famous. less drama. first i was like ok, maybe she was a tomboy. err wrong. i feel disgusted but im sharing to further how evil these beings are. she was active fleshlight for multiple guys in secret. and she had a office husband obviously that she spent work time fucking. they cant spend 1 hour doing something productive.@@katvond6346
I hope the trauma thoughts you’re experiencing I hope you heal from them. I’m sorry you went through all this. Remember it’s just thoughts your thoughts don’t define you. How much your trying to heal and try to get others to get help and get better means so much to so many people. Honestly I truly feel if people were more understanding about how people with NPD get due to there situations that got them that way if they were just willing to help others the world would be a better place. I don’t have NPD I have ocd so i understand how thoughts can get. When I feel upset and the negative thoughts come through I try to channel them with good thoughts. No matter how hard it is. It’s also very important to have a support system. Lee keep it up your doing great I love your videos Keep moving forward and try to channel the self doubt thoughts into positive thoughts! No matter how hard it may be and trust me I know I have ocd you can do it! Even if it’s small steps every little bit counts! If you ever want to talk to me you can inbox me if you ever want some advice on how I deal with intrusive thoughts.
Just yesterday I have experienced this. My partner had a day off and I had expectation that we will spend a good day together, since for a long time he didn’t collapse and he was very busy at work every day. He end up staying in bed scrolling his phone whole day. Then when we decided to go out at evening he suddenly started mocking me, feeling over irritated by our child, calling us crazy family, and when we came back I didn’t feel well, very dizzy and tired, expecting him to help me to mop the floor after he accidentally split the water. He just said I’m faking my illness and got aggressive. All the day I was trying to stay calm and in the end he just showed NO empathy and exploded on me just because he stayed alone one day?! I asked him what’s the reason of this anger, mocking and all of that, he said : I don’t know. Craziness.
Ypu are very self aware compared to many other NPD. Others try to "act" self aware ..it's almost like the saying "it's a thin line between love an hate"😊. Except talking about self love. It's as if they trying to prove other people are like them...then anything they do is okay...idk
When it comes to a narc, nothing is as it seems. If they post happy pics they are really not happy at all. If they are smiling they are really sad. If they act like they are ok being alone they are actually missing a relationship. The end.
My son's dad was a narcisist he ended his life. Then my fiance he is also a narcisist and I had to call the police so many times so that he didn't kill himself. I don't know why I am only attracted to narcisists.
Me too!! My partner is a textbook case narc, but even though I was there, I never felt more lonely. He would ignore me and then go to the bedroom with his iPad. It's a lot worse than being alone with no one around than to have someone there physically who's absent emotionally, mentally and spiritually.
Then leave. Im sorry to say, if you feel lonely with someone and decide to stay even after years of trying but still the same, then leave. Its not like you are bound by real chains. If you say u cant because bla bla bla, then excuses mam. If you chose to sleep with the enemy whilst knowing its your enemy. Then you betrayed yourself. I got out, many others did, but it takes self sacrifice in that too
when I first was going to kick the person out he said he was going to end his life & he said he would be alone & had nobody. I called a suicide line but he wouldn't talk to them. Once he knew i wasn't going to kick him out Within 24 hrs he was back to the same behavior..
Unfortunately they manipulated you & likely had no plans to actually end their life. They bank on you caring about them so when they say that they know you’ll run to their rescue. Or they try & guilt you, that’s why you have to call them on their bluff. Say you’re going to call the cops because you feel they are a threat to themselves. Unless he was serious he’ll leave, they don’t want to deal with cops.
We all struggle with feelings of loneliness sometimes. Not just narcissists. We are humans that primitively were made to procreate and human contact is our basic need from birth. I do however understand that certain personalities drown their loneliness with drugs and alcohol.
These words, in the very beginning are why I can say that a narcissist surely has gone through trauma, and you’re listening to this poor man’s trauma and his strength all at the same time, so just know, narcissists cannot be healed. It’s a personality trait, but it’s also not their fault because they’re living through fear and doing the best. They can just like the borderline on the opposite spectrum, because a borderline can do just as much damage and even most the time they kill them selves if they can make it to 30
This may be really crappy to say...As a person who was victimized to the point of feeling suicidal. Brought me down lower than I had ever been, I hope that itch that has me spending so far 3 yrs getting my life again, since I cannot pay her back, it pleases me to no end to know that she has created her own prison. Good for her. Thank God every day I don't have to live like her.
Alone as in "not having narcissistic supply/ a partner and Sex": Bad. When I was with him, my covert narc ex always told me that I was needy and clingy for texting amd wanting to see him often. I was definitely scared and feeling extremely unsafe, because I knew what he did when he was alone at his place......
The more I watch your videos the more I think I’m a narcissist too and I’m meeting other narcissists because I’m the same can’t be alone I hate it gotta find supply somehow by any means
Thank you lie for this message and this video you bringing a lot of us out of the shell that we believe that no system exists because I never knew exist p emoji and yes I will look at you at you to August 31st thank you so much Lee God bless you 🙏🥰
My narc ex claimed she had been single and hadn't slept with anyone in 3 years. Yet she cheated on me multiple times and jumped into a new relationship right after we brokeup. What are the odds she lied 🙄🙄🙄
Most likely, in the back of their minds, they are thinking "Who can I get new or do they already have someone in mind to be the next victim in their NARC ARMS LOL
Just means they have to start being accountable, self accountable. Cry me a river after everything. They put us through then being alone and have to self reflect. That's the least that can happen to them. They need to be alone because they are toxic poison to other people.
I don't think that this is a uniquely narcissistic reaction. Honestly, most people cannot handle being alone with themselves. As someone who has always thrived on being alone, it has always astonished me how the majority of people cannot handle it Hell, all one need do is look at all the many, many people who will make the choice to remain in, or repeatedly return to abusive relationships simply because they can deal with extreme abuse better than they can with being alone
Depressed, restless, bored. I have a phobia of getting a panic attack being alone. My thoughts are about how awful it us to be alone. Need to be entertained to forget about the panic attacks which come out of blue. I have a panic disorder. I even keep tv on to rid the intense discomfort. For me it isn't about bad thoughts, rather loneliness. I'd drink but can't drink alcohol. In past Ritalin cured the problem but I get panic from Ritalin now.
@@birdlover6842 I had an ex who was toxic but his flavor was more BPD. He said he was empty and I like what? Are you hungry? He was like no, I’m empty. Huh? Luckily we only dated 6 weeks as it got weird really fast. I found out later he had a cornucopia of mental health, traumatic brain injury and personality disorders.
Man, I drank a lot in my marriage just so I could tolerate his psychotic ass to protect my son until his dad finally left us and moved away. Hope i wasn't the narc 😂😬 Thank heavens i lost the desire for alcohol like that.
It's a scary thing man. My ex narcissist lately has been posting videos on twitter that she since deleted. A few of the videos she was crying saying how alone she is. Another couple of videos she was crying saying she is a failure and a worthless piece of s. Crocodile tears to me. Other videos she's screaming at the top of her lungs about random stuff singing incoherently. Yah.
May I ask how it came to be that you were diagnosed as having narcissistic personality disorder, and how did you take it, initially? Did it take a lot for you to accept it? I am just curious, because my mother is a professionally diagnosed narcissist, and the only reason that she even saw someone in the first place is because she tries to manipulate them into giving her narcotics. She was never interested in gaining insight into, or receiving help for what is actually wrong with her. And God knows that she will never accept or admit to the diagnosis.
But this is not happening to my husband, so I’m thinking maybe he is not a narcissist and maybe I am crazy because he acts like this separation is normal and all he wants is for me to be healthy and come home whenever I’m ready or not he’ll support whatever I want so I don’t see it is hoovering except on my end I see it as me failing to go no contact because I’m afraid.
Lol my x bet the hell outta me one night and my face looked like a huge black and purple orange.. lol next day, we went on like nothing happened… he said, why don’t you stay home and hide this… I said, if you’re man enough to do it.. I’m woman enough to show it.. I will that I could tag you in this so I’m sure that you read it.. have a good evening and I love your channel
It's kind of ironic that narcissists don't like being alone. Their behaviour pushes everyone away, and their social self is parroting whatever keeps people under their control. Being alone is the one time you get to be real without anyone else's influence. If they could get through the self-hate, they could start the shadow work and improve themselves.
It would destroy them if they would look deep into themselves. They won´t do that. Therefore they always look for company. Loneliness is the worst for them and they don´t like it.
@@RUclipsPremium-hj9jh They feed off of the emotional responses of others. They need massive amounts of validation and affirmation and have to sell illusions to unsuspecting people because they KNOW who they are and how they feel. I will never forget that when my ex husband abandoned me with a 2 yr old and 3 month old and pregnant with our third, I was taken to find him to tell him I was going to the hospital for delivery. Do you know where he was...? Standing outside at a gas station with a cup of coffee and a cigarette, staring off into space. He was renting a trailer, so why would he be standing outside at 11 o'clock at night? Just to be around people. He had fully expected me and the kids to move in with him, but I knew the area he was moving into was drug-infested and his shadow self was calling him again and the only reason he wanted me to come was to be company and bring my food stamps and cleaning and organization supply to brighten the place up. No sauce.
We can’t even fathom the strongholds on them. It’s the hardest thing they’ll ever have to probably do. To confront themselves is terrifying for them. The pain and confusion is unbearable. Now I understand why my Narc was so worried and would say he was never going to go to heaven. That God just can’t forgiven for everything they’ve done and destroyed it’s hard to know deep down inside you have lied and manipulated and used people. Hurt so many. Idk but I truly believe their only salvation in life, mind, spirit and physically (because they do get physically sick too) is God and therapy. However, the stronghold is real and one many of us can’t even wrap our heads around it. They aren’t just broken they are shattered. Imagine trying to put yourself together when your broken but shattered that’s even harder. I love the song “in the name of Jesus” by Katy Nichole because that’s all I feel that we can do at this point. Just sayin.
Thank you for saying the unfair truth: narcs dont end up alone. Its their victims that do.
😞
At least we can deal with it. Somewhat. They would self-destruct.
I can entertain myself for decades, learn stuff. I'm an interesting person. I like me
@@recoveringsoul755😊Kudos!! We must love ourselves first and foremost!!❤
@@iramsavir5631 exactly. And then we won't end up with another one. Because we aren't afraid to be alone
Being alone is better...
This is so true. The loneliness can drive them crazy. When my ex narc ran out of supply and alcohol/weed wasn’t enough he ended up in the psych ward.
Yes that’s what many end up like. Sad
Very true
It is a mental disorder
His awareness of his toxicity and ability to check himself and adjust the behavior is amazing. I comment him for that 💯. I wish my mom was able to do that 😔
I hear what you are saying Lee. But so many victims of their abuse end up way more damaged and ruined than narcs. And they didn't deserve or instigate the abuse. And some take their lives. So i hear what you are saying about the loneliness of a narcissist. But narcs still come out on top in pur society. Especially if they are men. I wish it wasnt like that, but it is.
I do appreciate what you are doing. There will be fewer people abused and fooled by narcs because of your work.
They can't handle being alone because they don't get any attention/supply and they hate their own company.
Hey,
I found your channel today. I wanted to say, I have mad respect dude. After being diagnosed you stepped up, to not only do better and become better, but ti raise awareness and help others. Mad respect for the strength of character you have as your own person, and I wish you the best in life. NPD has affected so many people, my sister and I are still recovering from being raised in the environment.
I’m happier on my own…the peace is wonderful! I learned to enjoy it because as a child I was constantly sent to my room…for punishment…for breathing usually..
😢
With social media age, narc is never alone. I was shock to find out...
They have a 'relationship' with their internet or mobile phone...watching porn the whole day, everyday !!!
The Internet is the antidote to loneliness.
Yeah if they don't actually a real person, they'll go on dating sites and chat rooms.
Exactly.
Amen Internet
My ex husband was dangerous to my daughter. He deliberately punished me through her by perpetuating my childhood trauma on her and then had the nerve to still "pray for us to come back" and when I did (but THIS time as a SIGMA empath 💪🏾) to see if he had truly changed, he only did the exact same thing I'd left him for. When he committed suicide, I know it was his last act of revenge by never paying me my child support or telling me what he'd done to my daughter, but he will now have to pay for it ♾️ for infinity now, the exact way he suffered for it on earth...And all because he wouldn't change his manipulative ways and acknowledge that he wouldn't have lost me and the kids if he had listened to me when I tried to tell him that he was making bad choices for us all when I put myself in his hands. 🤷🏾♀️
What did he do to your daughter?
I'm sorry for all that and for the kids too😥💓
@@susanjeffay3851 I thank you for your kind words ma'am. I am so glad he is not here anymore. I still have some intense hatred flashes because it's only been a year ago but I thank God that we are all doing the best that we can.
@@RUclipsPremium-hj9jh I appreciate your empathy and I can feel that you are trying to work out in your mind your own experience. It is of the utmost importance to understood that these people are leeches who constantly seek to feed off of patience, kindness and support without doing any sort of internal adjusting. In their minds they have a trauma pass to simply find someone who will love them by accepting them in a continual state of decrepitude, and true love simply cannot stand to allow a partner to remain in a state that they cannot stand to even be in themselves. But that is exactly what they are asking of you, thus the confusion and misery. They are trying to make a strong person adjust their strength to help them feel assured that they will never be shed off as dead weight by manipulative tactics that batter your mind and morals. Being able to feel someone's pain does NOT make it your responsibility to fix it. Just as you carry pain and still have love to give, you must accept that THEY are required to bear their own scars, and they should stay away from people if they are not committed to the lifelong process of becoming the best version of themselves that does not allow them to hurt others as punishment for not being willing to address their dangerous, unhealthy behaviors. It is simply unimaginable, the lengths these people will go through to avoid being responsible for themselves, and it is extremely devastating to know that they are capable of extremely vindictive revenge on those who simply tried to help, but refused to be held hostage to their willful illness. We cannot change what happened, but we can REFUSE to allow them to continue mistreating our support for a single second longer.
@@arhafrench5319Spot on. 🎯👏🏽👏🏽
They hate being alone…. Whereas I’m a loner. It would drain me of my energy to give him attention 24/7 cause he didn’t know how to entertain himself or have any good hobbies.
They always want to distract themselves in one way or another. We all distract ourselves with something, but always depending on other people for your happiness doesn’t do much in the long run. They can’t be alone for very long, something has to feed their ego or validate them in some way or another. Someone to distract them from themselves.
Well said.
Best punishment for a narcopath is solitary confinement for life.
😫
😆 narcopath a narcissistic sociopath
With that idiotic mindset you’re essentially making sure more of them are born
@@JulesEdits1992umm how when they’re alone in solitary…confinement?? You thought you were saying something profound 😂
@@TheExtrovertedHermit wow. Literal thinking much?
These people become that way because of being excluded early in life
If your response is always to banish before attempting to comprehend, which is typically American by the way lmao, more of them will become full fledged monsters.
Thank you for stating the truth. Unlike most RUclipsrs, you've said what actually I've noticed in real life. Most Narcissists are married, successful with children. It's the Narc victims' lives that are ruined. Nobody said life is fair. 😔
Thank you for beeing so honest and authentic.
Today I gave the selflove journal to my son, because he had birthday two weeks ago. I did'nt know how he would react. He was very pleased and he emphasized that he likes the presantion and that he will use it. Thank you ❤🙏
Today was Jacob (James)1,12 in my bible app 🌿📖⚘️ .I suggest we all know these feelings of lonelyness and pain in our healing process but as we see by your example and many others who are on this way it is worth to endure these times for the reward of a new life. May the Lord help us and be at our side.❤🙏
You're my favourite narcissist, Lee! Thank you so much for the work you've been doing! It gives me so much more perspective in dealing with a narcissist! 🙏🏼🧡
This man has truly cracked the code, by admitting to himself and others and literally the whole world, he helps other people both unknown to him and loved by him by validating their experiences all the while gaining his supply which he still
needs in the healthiest way from supportive comments here and family and friends.
Truly a win win case he has built for himself and for the world I could not be more happy that this man has found the help he deserves 🌻
👍 Keep up the amazing inner strength you have and spread the word 🌺 you will never be lonely so long as you have hope.
Hi Lee , my brother who is a narc plays video games ALL night he makes soo much noise and talks so loud . Now i understand why they cant be alone and do nothing at the same time
After watching many of your clips.... I am now a self aware borderline.
The book "I Got Tired of Pretending" by Bob Earll talks a lot about this kind of thing.
The co-dependency sounds crippling!😔
Can be
My ex mother in law is always ripping and running and it was clear she was running away from her own wickedness. Unlike you, she was pure evil. I have never met anyone as cruel. To this day, damn near 70 and can never sit down. It's sad and disturbing (MJW).
Hello, new to your channel. I am about a month out of a narcissistic (relationship?). It definitely ended with a bang. He brutally attacked me, and then tried to kill us both by smashing my new car into not one, but two cars while speeding over 100 miles an hour. I still feel numb. I knew about narcissism-it’s a word you hear all the time -but not that the snap could be so instant, so dangerous. I should have seen it coming. For all of you watching, when he says narcissists can be dangerous, believe him. I’ve been watching your videos for the past few days, and it’s like hearing things from his point of view. You’ve helped me put the pieces together and step out of this fog of confusion. Only wish I’d listened sooner. Thank you.
My field of study was abnormal psychology & criminology. You'd think I'd be smart enough to NOT try to have a good relationship with a narcissistic sibling. I KNEW she was/is & maybe my arrogance made me think we CUD. Well, it sure didn't take long to need to run away. Thx for putting info out there & doing what you can to help yourself, too. Wishing you the best
Our egos make us think that our particular loving, patient, and empathetic nature despite trauma of some sort cannot help BUT change the narcissistic people that we encounter. (I tried that with my sister and she nearly drove me into a mental breakdown.) But the sort of love that narcissists need is a mixture of both parental love, where we love them like children we birthed, and unconditional love, which only God can give. However, even parents and God require that they stop doing and thinking selfish, abusive acts and thoughts that keep them getting into trouble that they have to be bailed out of. They cannot repent or be truly remorseful because in their minds, they cannot move on past the wounds that affected them like we empaths did, and they are only doing what it takes to survive because nobody understands how wretched they truly feel and think. I'm glad you understood finally that no contact is the only way to go with an unrepentant, unremorseful and actively self-consumed sibling who truly lacks the capability to accept that she cannot be good or feel better or worthy just by standing next to you-she simply must desire to accept that she must want to change her thoughts and ways. God bless you and congratulations on your achievements and accomplishments!
Thank you. Blessings
‘IF YOU PUT GOD ALMIGHTY’ FIRST YOU WILL NEVER FEEL LONELY… PUT GOD FIRST!!💯💯💯♥️🙏🙏🙏
Yes!!!! Absolutely!!! We are NEVER alone!!! Not for one single moment, even if we truly think we are. Our Abba Father LORD God, our Saviour Jesus Christ, and His Holy Spirit are constantly with us, no matter how we feel. That is sooooo reassuring... 💖💖💖🙏🙏🙏
My exBoyfriend is an alcoholic and addicted to 2 meds he buys on the street.
Last I heard he was alone with his elderly mother complaining to her that she was the only person he had left to talk to him.
He should have thought about how he was going to be alone again when he treated me like garbage and lied to me.
I really am a ride or die kind of partner. I stuck out a bad marriage for 30 years. Yet that man managed to drive me off after only 2 months of living with him.
Either I learned my lesson or he’s just that bad. Maybe a combo of both.
What did you think he had going for him in the first place?
@@monarene44 I didn’t know about his addictions until I moved in with him and had been there a while. He hid them very well until then.
I am sorry about that loneliness Lee. Prayers goes to you and your family.
I’ve left my narc husband almost 2 months ago now. I seen him 1 week ago at a funeral and he did not look good. He’s walking around like he’s ok but clearly it shows he’s not…. You can tell that he’s struggling mentally. Kinda sad…
Good Lord, PLEASE watch out for yourself. 🙏 He knew you would probably see him and he is very likely plotting on how to get back to you. What you saw was the parasite without the host. They cannot live without someone to drain of money, energy, attention and time--MEAT. He is in the stages of narcissistic collapse, where he cannot validate that he is good and acceptable anymore because you are not THERE to shield him from his delusions and folly now. They will seek the easy path of getting back to the host, like the demons that come back and bring 7 more when they are cast out of a person and then allowed back in when they don't find anyone else to house them adequately. PLEASE if you believe in God or karma, let him experience the full rain of the consequences of abusing you. You may not know it, but the only reason he even thought he was ok and had escaped answering for his abuse was because you, with your wonderful patient self, were shielding him from what he deserved as an ☔ umbrella. All of what he had coming to him was covering and defiling YOU, ma'am. Now that you are gone, he is finally getting that he had no right to mistreat you. Watch out for those calls and texts. Watch out for the messages from people about how bad off his condition is. Beware of his pleas to you to take him back, "if you are such a good person" or "if you ever loved him." Your love was never missing. HIS was. Continue to stay separated from him so that you can fully process what kept you there so that you never harbor the enemy out of a mistaken sense of duty, honor, nobility, or moral obligation EVER AGAIN.
Once again Lee..
You make some good valid points.😉
Waving the Red Flag!⛳️⛳️🔥🔥🔥Can’t wait!🙂
🙏
So whether someone is ok with being alone or not shows you if they are narcissist or not. Thank you. This is very helpful, since narcissists are well known to gaslight & project. Many accuse their victim as the narcissist. Some may even mistakenly believe their victim to be the narcissist. When this happens it can cause much confusion & doubt in the well intentioned victims mind. If that was ever you or even is you currently , well now you know.
Mine was addicted to an on-line video game/world. He said he would play for days on end. This was his way of getting what he needed and avoiding suffering.
My narc could never be alone because he stayed on the phone 24/7 even when driving a forklift. 🤦🏽♀️
Thank you for your informative video.
Thanks for being here
4:43 nailed it
We cannot even fathom what happens to them in their minds when they fail at yet another relationship. Once I realized how truly ill my ex was and I do believe he still is, I could only imagine when he was alone in his home and the chatter would start in his being. His poor family (siblings) he would call them and have them on pins in needles to the point that they would think to drive like 3.5 hours to him. He’d have them on the phone till they could calm him down. What’s truly sad about narcs is that the family don’t do what I think should be attempted. An intervention! Yup and intervention. Where everyone (siblings & their children) meet with that Narc and tell them they are not leaving until he goes with them to sign up for therapy. Period! I think it’s the last resort when that Narc is and has almost but destroyed their lives and the lives of others and worse will continue to hurt more people (new supply). Nah as a family member I would refuse for them to continue to hurt other women and especially if the family are Christian believers. We are to go to them and set the record straight and help them. Ok if they don’t go to each person they’ve harmed and confess and ask to be forgiven and continue therapy then that’s it. Now it’s totally between that Narc and God. But as family and believers we have to try to get to the bottom of their lies and manipulation and confront them head on. Just my opinion because the Bible says to go to them and co front them. Just saying
This makes sense...he cannot live alone and will move ANYONE in his home all the time.
THANK You Lee! ♥️
You’re welcome
Thanks Lee. You have greatly assisted me with understanding and seeing the clarity through the psychological abuse I have experienced with my narcissistic/psychotic wife.
Thanks, Lee. You described my ex perfectly, every part of it. The drinking and everything else you said. ❤
When I'm alone, I feel like all my thoughts drown me too. Idk if that is just a narcissistic trait . All my anger at my Nex boils over in my head and I go to the gym to thug that shii out before I do or say something I regret.
SENT @10:10
Ya know Lee... Your so Positive, Plus you admit to your own issue's.
I Highly Admire You, Thank You 😊😊😊
♥️♥️ i appreciate it
Sorry to hear all this , I hope in spite of everything that u had a happy birthday x
I still don’t get why narc’s always say they wanna be alone or left alone….. yet… 😂??
😂😂
Right…. They always say they want to be left alone or they want peace in their lives, like as if they aren’t the contributing factor to their madness. While saying they want peace and to be left alone they have to be engaged with others. I’ve seen them engage with people they claim they don’t care for just to be around someone… Narcs are weird and they’re reasoning for their actions almost NEVER make sense to NOBODY but THEMSELVES!!!
When is a narco alone?😂 🤷♀️ Like neverrr.
They have backups for backups. I didnt understand how deep it went, but now as a male, i will never date a woman that dont have friends from the same gender. I found out my ex didnt have 1 girlfriend, why? Since teenage years she has been the one taking her friends boyfriends or sleeping with them, it happened to her once as an act of revenge from another girl, thats when she lost her mind, like, how can someone do this to her? But when she have done it all her life, thats ok to be overlooked. These demons dont work on logic, they are weak predators who can only feel strong by deceit, a head on fight is what a narc hates the most
@@TheShaqii Well said! Same here, the narco had no male friends😳 they were all jealous🤣🤣😅.....omg
right! or they arent real ones! or they always hit you with the famous. less drama. first i was like ok, maybe she was a tomboy. err wrong. i feel disgusted but im sharing to further how evil these beings are. she was active fleshlight for multiple guys in secret. and she had a office husband obviously that she spent work time fucking. they cant spend 1 hour doing something productive.@@katvond6346
I hope the trauma thoughts you’re experiencing I hope you heal from them. I’m sorry you went through all this. Remember it’s just thoughts your thoughts don’t define you. How much your trying to heal and try to get others to get help and get better means so much to so many people. Honestly I truly feel if people were more understanding about how people with NPD get due to there situations that got them that way if they were just willing to help others the world would be a better place. I don’t have NPD I have ocd so i understand how thoughts can get. When I feel upset and the negative thoughts come through I try to channel them with good thoughts. No matter how hard it is. It’s also very important to have a support system. Lee keep it up your doing great I love your videos Keep moving forward and try to channel the self doubt thoughts into positive thoughts! No matter how hard it may be and trust me I know I have ocd you can do it! Even if it’s small steps every little bit counts! If you ever want to talk to me you can inbox me if you ever want some advice on how I deal with intrusive thoughts.
Just yesterday I have experienced this. My partner had a day off and I had expectation that we will spend a good day together, since for a long time he didn’t collapse and he was very busy at work every day.
He end up staying in bed scrolling his phone whole day. Then when we decided to go out at evening he suddenly started mocking me, feeling over irritated by our child, calling us crazy family, and when we came back I didn’t feel well, very dizzy and tired, expecting him to help me to mop the floor after he accidentally split the water. He just said I’m faking my illness and got aggressive.
All the day I was trying to stay calm and in the end he just showed NO empathy and exploded on me just because he stayed alone one day?!
I asked him what’s the reason of this anger, mocking and all of that, he said : I don’t know.
Craziness.
Ypu are very self aware compared to many other NPD. Others try to "act" self aware ..it's almost like the saying "it's a thin line between love an hate"😊. Except talking about self love. It's as if they trying to prove other people are like them...then anything they do is okay...idk
When is the narc ever alone??🤔 The ones I know are always in somebody's face!!!!!✌️
Same 😂😂
@@Lightboltmotivationofficial Ok lol when!!!!!🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Can you make a shirt that says, “protect your peace”?
When it comes to a narc, nothing is as it seems. If they post happy pics they are really not happy at all. If they are smiling they are really sad. If they act like they are ok being alone they are actually missing a relationship. The end.
As always thank you ❤ you are awsome!! I appreciate you..
🙏🏽🙏🏽
If narcs are not self aware, what do they regret? What bubbles if they’re none the wiser? I’m confused!!!
My son's dad was a narcisist he ended his life. Then my fiance he is also a narcisist and I had to call the police so many times so that he didn't kill himself. I don't know why I am only attracted to narcisists.
I feel lonely with my husband who I suspect is a narcissist. :(
Me too!! My partner is a textbook case narc, but even though I was there, I never felt more lonely. He would ignore me and then go to the bedroom with his iPad. It's a lot worse than being alone with no one around than to have someone there physically who's absent emotionally, mentally and spiritually.
Then leave. Im sorry to say, if you feel lonely with someone and decide to stay even after years of trying but still the same, then leave. Its not like you are bound by real chains. If you say u cant because bla bla bla, then excuses mam. If you chose to sleep with the enemy whilst knowing its your enemy. Then you betrayed yourself. I got out, many others did, but it takes self sacrifice in that too
Thank you ❤from Detroit
He has a lot of supplies he doesn't need one living with him under the same roof... Plus he has 2 clingy dogs
Clingy dogs? Do you dislike dogs?
@@tranquility9325 clingy as he likes... Nothing wrong with dogs of course
@mermaid78 I love dogs. I don't know of too many that have a disconnected personality from their owner except for some cats.
when I first was going to kick the person out he said he was going to end his life & he said he would be alone & had nobody. I called a suicide line but he wouldn't talk to them. Once he knew i wasn't going to kick him out Within 24 hrs he was back to the same behavior..
Unfortunately they manipulated you & likely had no plans to actually end their life. They bank on you caring about them so when they say that they know you’ll run to their rescue. Or they try & guilt you, that’s why you have to call them on their bluff. Say you’re going to call the cops because you feel they are a threat to themselves. Unless he was serious he’ll leave, they don’t want to deal with cops.
Sound like my ex. He had two previous attempts so I took him seriously. He big raged at me when I called the police.
it gets so tiring to walk on egg shells everyday@@mellymelle860
We all struggle with feelings of loneliness sometimes. Not just narcissists. We are humans that primitively were made to procreate and human contact is our basic need from birth. I do however understand that certain personalities drown their loneliness with drugs and alcohol.
These words, in the very beginning are why I can say that a narcissist surely has gone through trauma, and you’re listening to this poor man’s trauma and his strength all at the same time, so just know, narcissists cannot be healed. It’s a personality trait, but it’s also not their fault because they’re living through fear and doing the best. They can just like the borderline on the opposite spectrum, because a borderline can do just as much damage and even most the time they kill them selves if they can make it to 30
This may be really crappy to say...As a person who was victimized to the point of feeling suicidal. Brought me down lower than I had ever been, I hope that itch that has me spending so far 3 yrs getting my life again, since I cannot pay her back, it pleases me to no end to know that she has created her own prison. Good for her. Thank God every day I don't have to live like her.
Alone as in "not having narcissistic supply/ a partner and Sex": Bad. When I was with him, my covert narc ex always told me that I was needy and clingy for texting amd wanting to see him often. I was definitely scared and feeling extremely unsafe, because I knew what he did when he was alone at his place......
I love love being alone
Why do relationships with narcissist always only get worse
😂😂
The more I watch your videos the more I think I’m a narcissist too and I’m meeting other narcissists because I’m the same can’t be alone I hate it gotta find supply somehow by any means
You need to look at all the symptoms and not a few, because some things can also relate to other things. Just be wise
It's funny my ex narc said that he likes to be alone. But at the same time, he says that he is co-dependent and he can't be by himself.
Thank you lie for this message and this video you bringing a lot of us out of the shell that we believe that no system exists because I never knew exist p emoji and yes I will look at you at you to August 31st thank you so much Lee God bless you 🙏🥰
My narc ex claimed she had been single and hadn't slept with anyone in 3 years. Yet she cheated on me multiple times and jumped into a new relationship right after we brokeup.
What are the odds she lied 🙄🙄🙄
Praise God for you❤
Praise God for you
Just for today!!!!
lonely, miserable and bitter....they dont like anyone lol
thanks mate(from a narcissist)
“I was about to get loose!”😂
😆
😂😂😂😂
I cracked up so much!!! And it’s so much funnier when Lee said it lol
Most likely, in the back of their minds, they are thinking "Who can I get new or do they already have someone in mind to be the next victim in their NARC ARMS LOL
Just means they have to start being accountable, self accountable. Cry me a river after everything. They put us through then being alone and have to self reflect. That's the least that can happen to them. They need to be alone because they are toxic poison to other people.
I subscribed long ago but i had to do again.
I didn’t know some of them act like children😕
How were narcs treated as children? To make them become narcs
I don't think that this is a uniquely narcissistic reaction. Honestly, most people cannot handle being alone with themselves. As someone who has always thrived on being alone, it has always astonished me how the majority of people cannot handle it
Hell, all one need do is look at all the many, many people who will make the choice to remain in, or repeatedly return to abusive relationships simply because they can deal with extreme abuse better than they can with being alone
This is what narc karma.. no one will love them forever.
Save yourself from a narc…
Is it loneliness or emptiness?
They get into their own head and they don't like it. This is why they can't be with just one partner for long.
Depressed, restless, bored. I have a phobia of getting a panic attack being alone. My thoughts are about how awful it us to be alone. Need to be entertained to forget about the panic attacks which come out of blue. I have a panic disorder. I even keep tv on to rid the intense discomfort. For me it isn't about bad thoughts, rather loneliness. I'd drink but can't drink alcohol. In past Ritalin cured the problem but I get panic from Ritalin now.
Combo
@@birdlover6842 I had an ex who was toxic but his flavor was more BPD. He said he was empty and I like what? Are you hungry? He was like no, I’m empty. Huh? Luckily we only dated 6 weeks as it got weird really fast. I found out later he had a cornucopia of mental health, traumatic brain injury and personality disorders.
@@mellymelle860 I have never felt empty before. Can't imagine it.
Empaths feel the loneliness as well.
Man, I drank a lot in my marriage just so I could tolerate his psychotic ass to protect my son until his dad finally left us and moved away. Hope i wasn't the narc 😂😬 Thank heavens i lost the desire for alcohol like that.
A narcissist alone it probably makes them more neurotic batty because they have no one to hurt or control
Damn. I go years before getting back into another relationship. Smh
They are never alone they have their friends and family "flying monkeys"
😂😂
It's a scary thing man. My ex narcissist lately has been posting videos on twitter that she since deleted. A few of the videos she was crying saying how alone she is. Another couple of videos she was crying saying she is a failure and a worthless piece of s. Crocodile tears to me. Other videos she's screaming at the top of her lungs about random stuff singing incoherently. Yah.
So why are they extra mean after being alone for days i dont understand. Icould never show empathy luke that
Clean cook ❤
Drink.....chamomile and mint 🍵 ☕️ tea and I am making it better 😋
Wow he drinks like crazy
I want to be on your show
Guess im not a narcissist i love being by myself.
May I ask how it came to be that you were diagnosed as having narcissistic personality disorder, and how did you take it, initially? Did it take a lot for you to accept it?
I am just curious, because my mother is a professionally diagnosed narcissist, and the only reason that she even saw someone in the first place is because she tries to manipulate them into giving her narcotics. She was never interested in gaining insight into, or receiving help for what is actually wrong with her. And God knows that she will never accept or admit to the diagnosis.
i have a playlist called self aware sundays
But this is not happening to my husband, so I’m thinking maybe he is not a narcissist and maybe I am crazy because he acts like this separation is normal and all he wants is for me to be healthy and come home whenever I’m ready or not he’ll support whatever I want so I don’t see it is hoovering except on my end I see it as me failing to go no contact because I’m afraid.
The "thoughts" ...that's the Holy Spirit convicting a person, not just a Narc. Js
did you remarry again? or did yall work it out and get back together?
They worked it out and are still together.
Lol my x bet the hell outta me one night and my face looked like a huge black and purple orange.. lol next day, we went on like nothing happened… he said, why don’t you stay home and hide this… I said, if you’re man enough to do it.. I’m woman enough to show it.. I will that I could tag you in this so I’m sure that you read it.. have a good evening and I love your channel
They dont! Because they can easily install a dating app and play with many supply
Wow
Pity to them. May they find contentment in life and heal for life