**Breaking news!**My Phallo Memoir is Now Available To Buy! : finlaygames.com/my-books/ • Grab a signed copy and other signed goodies here: ko-fi.com/finlaygames/shop • Detailed phalloplasty discussion and reveal video: ko-fi.com/s/f854c136f2 • Enjoying my content and want to say thanks? Buy me a 'coffee!' : ko-fi.com/finlaygames
Please think extra long and hard about this surgery. When you look online at medical sites, you see that 60% of these operations produce complications that require additional surgeries. In 40% of those 60%, no amount of correction will ever rectify the problem. The biggest problems coming from the urethra. It is not uncommon to have scar tissue build up, making the process of emptying the bladder difficult, also "pockets of pee" can develop at stitch sites that means you end up having to finish passing urine by squeezing it out of collection areas by hand...if a little urine is left in the body, over time, it can collect, harden, producing more restriction, which invites bacteria leading to infection. Is this rare? No, not at all. In the journal Medicine it lists "high rates of complications exist with SRS". It is not out of the norm to end up needing a catheter for the rest of your life. Many transgendered people don't make youtube and Tik-Tok videos showing that they have been reduced to a catheter....because it's not a fun topic and the suicide rates for those post op on a catheter lifelong is higher than normal...and normal in this case after surgery also remains high.
I did think long and hard. This has been a complicated surgery. But now l have completed my surgery and those years of pain and frustration were very worthwhile, to have the body l have today. My penis is a source of joy, it's relieved so much dysphoria, l am able to be intimate with my partner. It's so important to see and understand both sides of this surgery, there are complications but there are also successes. For a more balanced view l recommend reading my memoir, Top to Bottom, which you can find here finlaygames.com/my-books/
I've been going through videos for the past one-week in order to really get and understand how serious the issue of transitioning is and how difficult it is and why, why people would go through such physical changes. This video has answered and cleared my mind. I absolutely wish there was an easier way for you guys, but if this means anything to you and I think it would, people are changing and becoming more accepting. Not only towards trans people, but hopefully towards every section of society. Because what makes us and our kind special is our diversity. So much love and a bear hug for you !
I hope lots and lots of trans men are watching your videos. You're a font of very honest and transparent information, presented in a straightforward and clear manner (with a much-needed touch of humor!) I know you are doing a huge service to many people thinking of transitioning, or in the process of transitioning. Bless you dear. Do you think some of your depression could be caused by sleep deprivation? If you are getting up many times to pee, that could seriously affect your quality of rest and cause mood disorders. HUGS!
I don't mean this to be offensive, I'm speaking of a place of wanting someone to hurt less. Would it have been easier to just see a psychologist to help cure your gender dysphoria, then to spent all that money and pain on altering your body just to fit your brain? That seems like it's being anti-trans but I'm just trying to think of ways to make people happy without them having to go through so much pain. If you didn't have gender dysphoria anymore, wouldn't you just be happy with the body you were born with? Or am I not understanding
That's basically conversion therapy. There are many practices that try and attempt to do this, the same that attempt to do this to gay people. It's cruel , doesn't work and does immeasurable harm. When you know your gender, no amount of therapy is going to change that.
That's completely not true. People have reconstructive surgery all the time and the body does not have a rejection reaction to it as it's our own flesh as blood. False information!
Good to see that you are taking things in stride. I agree be your own advocate when speaking with your doctor. I also understand about having to accept the stage you are at....... the waiting game. You already know because of all of your AA work and such that one of the best things to get by with the struggle is doing and believe in the serenity prayer...... love you sweetheart and always hope you the best......xxxxx god bless
Dear Finn, you are a very special person. In your honest words I can see your power and the indispensability of your previous surgery, to be yourself, in any case. The fight is a part of you, psycologically and phisically and these two things walk togheter in bad and good ways, for everyone. I ezpecially hope your urinary infections resove soon because they are terribly to bear. I send you a big hug as I was there! 😊❣️😊
This meant so much for me to watch. Thank you for opening up like this so honestly. I am having metoidioplasty in February and I feel very similarly to you, but I hear so much anxiety from my loved ones buzzing around me about what-if-so-and-so even though the data suggests that even if I do experience even very serious complications it'll most likely resolve over time, and EVEN IN THE INTERUM I know I will not have the parts that are distressing me and I will feel like I am on the road to actually being able to enjoy living in my body.
Bless you buddy, yes its hard to filter out other peoples fears. Their worries are of course understandable, but for us, there really isnt any option, its not a choice, its a cure and even a scarred body, that doesn't function perfectly, is preferable to the completely wrong parts! This is a tough journey, but if you focus on the mini milestones its a little easier and before you know it, your done!!! Good luck in feb!
You do a fantastic job of explaining emotions and conveying information. Your vlogs feel like a close friend is telling me about his issues. So here's friending back at you! ..Wishing you happiness.
Oooo I agree with this completely. Like grabbing a cup of coffee and catching up with a friend! Love your videos Finn. And your great attitude and smile are contagious. Sending you love from California and wishing you lots of healing so you can get to stage 3.
Finn, you are such an awesome bloke. No matter what happens yes you get down a little bit but then you always find the good in everything. You are so special and in courage so many people. I am soon to be on T and then top surgery but I was afraid to even consider bottom surgery. I had heard so many bad things going wrong with with it that I was like no f***ing way!!!! I don't want to do that and have all those problems, but listening to you has made me realize that no matter what happens its worth it to be complete. So when I get the chance I will have my bottom surgery just because you have given me hope and strength. Love you to the moon and back. And by the way when you say you are such a great catch, you are I would be proud to be with you. I am going to be just as positive as you are. Love you, Lydia actually it's Liam now
You are so articulate and yet why am I not convinced?It seems such a Brutual solution. I actually saw a video of the process and I think it is much more complicated for FTM than MTF with the urinary system and dont forget the following points Infertility -for very young people this is a huge step most are not prepared for ! Possible life long complications and dependency on doctors to fix it Artificial Hormones are a health risk. The use of terminology to make it sound so much less is absurd ! This is a serious procedure and I do think you could have compromised ,after all ut isn't as though you will ever be a real make with a fully functioning penis .It is all an illusion it is like giving child a teddy bear instead of a parent at night exvwor it is a crocodile
It is a complicated surgery, but the results are much improved than they once were. It is a risk of course, but for us trans folk it's worth it to end the crippling dysphoria. And l did indeed compromise, the compromise is having a scar and having to come to terms with the fact that while it can get close to a cis males penis, it will of course never function in the same way. It most certainly is a penis though, and l am most certainly a man.
I am so glad you posted this! I am a ftm who did The rff in nov 2016 and since then had had issues with dripping, suprapubis katheter for almost that long and a lotta of up and down regarding peeing and Urinalinfektions that is narrowing the urethra further more and sometimes blocking it completely with stones. Lately i have thought about regretting butik like you I cant regret something that is so wonderful to the selfasteem like that but I usually give the advise to look into what the plans ares when something is wrong after the surgerys. The hardest for me is to be demanding corrections since I am fighting with the feeling that it is a selfmade issue, that so many people ares dying from actual deseases and I'm not.. Love to hear how you concerred those thoughts / Love (its my name actually)
What a wonderful name! Hello my friend. I feel for you and I can relate to your uncomfortability in asking for corrections. Unfortunately, a large chunk of society still view transgender surgery as a choice, as elective surgery, rather than the necessary medical intervention it is. This is then internalised in us, causing us shame and guilt. There is nothing to feel guilty for, dysphoria is a valid condition, being transgender is valid and we, like anyone else who has a debilitating condition, are entitled to seek and receive help. Much love and power to you!
I really like the way you look on things, I live in Sweden and we swedes are known for our passivity and demandlessness. I problaby offend some swedes now by this statement even if im like the rest of them. I am inspired of your ability to have a OpenOffice mind and during the years I have suffered with you and cryed with you as well. I cross my fingers that your complications will come to an end soon, hopefully with everything working like it is ment to /Love
you got a lot of courage. I got to get spine surgery or doctors say eventually i wont be able to use my arms. Im scared as hell of surgery :( for me any surgery is terrifying :(
That sounds absoluely terrifying my friend. I was scared too, we can never know the full outcome of surgery, here are always risks. All we can do is look at the statistics, look at other peoples experiences, and weigh up whether the risks will be worth it and ask ourselves if our lives will be improved by his surgery and thus worth the risk? The answer for me was yes, which is how in the end I found the courage. Sending much love and strength your way
@@FinnTheInfinncible Thank you for your kind words friend. I really appreciate it. I wish I had your emotional strength. Thank you and please enjoy your weekend.
The NHS funds the surgery itself. I paid out of pocket for travel to appointments, overnight stays before surgeries, medicaines and dressings, but you can get some help with that f you are on a low income.
This came at a good time. I’m having so many issues post stage one and keep getting messed around, my life feels so much like it’s on hold and my long term relationship broke down and I just want to get on with life. I’m still struggling and am having the hard debate to not proceed. I feel like London are too flippant and don’t take issues seriously until too late, and I don’t feel I can trust them anymore. I wish I had your resolve and patience.
Don't speak for everyone dude. Some of the complications can be permanent and there are people who would rather not go through all that, and people who have regrets about doing it. This is surgery, and it's a very individual thing. Just because you don't regret it doesn't mean others don't. I'm happy for you and but don't want other people jumping in without thinking properly and actually end up wih something permanent for the rest of their lives they do regret.
If you watch my videos, you'll know that I give a very honest and balanced view of the good and bad of surgery and l always stress that I speak from my own experience. Never , in any videos do l say I'm speaking for everyone, or say this surgery is complication free , or encourage people to have it.
I'm a trans guy, I'm young, haven't started any transition. But getting a bottom surgery is too scary for me. I also feel like I'm content with my genitalia... just achieving other more masculine traits and passing easier might make me happier... I experience dysphoria but I also try to disassociate the bottom dysphoria away and find other resolutions to ease it. I kinda feel insecure when speaking with other trans men, especially men who got bottom surgeries. You seem so happy! But am I adequate and valid for not wanting a bottom surgery?
Hi, I was wondering what the outlook for the "dripping" problem is. Isn't it something that would kind of get better over time? It wouldn't be nice to have to put up with wearing pads forever, but is there no other way of managing the problem? Keeping on having surgery in that area could lead to other problems. I really hope you get this sorted properly.
For some trans folks, dripping doesnt happen, however, due to the way we need to be reconfigured with our urthral pipe being rerouted, dripping does often happen as we dont have the same pelvic muscle set up as cis men do, meaning we cant use those muscles to push the last bit of wee out. Saying that though, many cis men also have an issue with dripping, so its not just trans guys! Usuall, its just a spot that dribbles out after peeing, with good technique it can be eliminated. Mine is so much beter now. Heres an update! ruclips.net/video/k7HDjPzCzbc/видео.html
@@FinnTheInfinncible Thank you so much for your reply. I've watched the update you recommended and it's good to hear from an older, more sensible guy and without all the over the top joking around that there is from the younger set. Some of us are older and didn't have the advantage of the openness of today. You're a good fella and I have enjoyed (is that the right word?) your informative videos. 👍
Yes that's the right word! I'm so glad you find my vids helpful. I agree with you, l too found it hard to find people my own age to relate to, which is why l started my own channel. I love to help and pay forward from those who kindly helped me. Thanks for your lovely comments!
Good for you!!! I'm almost tearing up listening to you talk. Im laying in bed right now at GRS Montreal. Im mtf and I had vaginoplasty. I'm so happy I don't have to deal with my flappy balls anymore. It feels pretty nice down there now.
@@FinnTheInfinncible Thank you so much 💜 I really appreciate the support. I'm just laying in bed waiting for the nurse to come take out my stent. My butt is stitched together and it hurts 🤕
@@RupturedCatalyst420x oh bless you 💜 the pain in early days is awful. I questioned my decision a few times! Just remember to not be a hero, ask for pain meds, and keep on top of them. Also, remember to breathe! We often shallow breathe when we are in pain, and that limits oxygen and ups the stress hormones. Take some nice slow deep breaths. This helps to get lots of oxygen in which not only helps with healing but also switches your body into parasympathetic nervous system functioning, releasing lots of pain releasing endorphins too 💜
@@FinnTheInfinncible That is some amazing advice. I finally got back home and im an emotional mess right now. I also just found out im moving around march 1st. I was offered a low income appartment from CMHA(Canadian Mental Health Association). Im pretty stressed though and i dont want to move. But i think its time i get my own place. Also dilating is such a chore right now, im not exactly enjoying it. Minus the fact im pretty much taking care of myself even though my dad said he would, but hes sick now, and my roomie said he would but hes just an idiot. So yeah... I appreciate the support. Thank you
I'm thinking people with small packages might choose a bigger one that leaks a little. So I'm happy you're content with your surgery. My comment is out of no where lol just something that came to mind while watching.
It's true that there are a lot of cis people out there that don't understand what motivates the decision of trans people to want to enrich their lives and make their lives meaningful by having surgeries as treatment for dysphoria. On the other hand, there are cis people out there who understand the concept that surgery is definitely the way to go as a very good treatment for dysphoria. I personally think that cis people that don't get it really need to take the time to stop and educate themselves. It would open up a new world of knowledge if they did. The things that trans people want and what cis people want aren't that different in the way that we all want meaningful lives. It's just that everybody's life is different, and so we all need different things that make our lives meaningful. In saying that, I've also learnt that every trans person is different too. Some trans people who experience dysphoria choose to have surgery to treat the symptoms, while other trans people medically don't feel they require to go down that path. As you say, and as I've learnt through reading and listening, dysphoria has been known to take lives and that is really a horrible thing to have happen. I am just so glad for all the people that experience dysphoria that surgery is available to help with that. I definitely get it. I really like this video, because the more that people talk about it and have conversations the more people are going to learn. So keep doing what your doing Finn, you're amazing! And I agree that for anyone wanting to achieve anything for themselves, all we can ever do is our very best and that is good enough xxx
Bless you, yes it is exaclt this, we (Trans folk) are no different to anyone else. All we want is to be happy and whole. Its just the case that for us, that often means hormones and surgery. Thank you for always being an amazing ally
Thank you for your comment. It's easy for me to be supportive because I understand that dysphoria is a genuine state of being that really can effect quality of life for some people who experience it, and I would want them to be able to feel happy and whole. And if there is a means to be able to do that then it's a good thing. All it takes is to stop for a moment and put yourself in someone else's shoes and understand how hard it would be from that person's point of view. We all experience pain that we strive to work through, and overcome, it just looks different for each of us. Take away the labels and we all come under the same umbrella at the end of the day, of being human. Thank you for being such a supportive person too xx
I would really love to know about your sensitivity during sex, is it the same? better? worse than before your surgery pleasure wise because i’m in need of an asnwer to decide if i will have the same sensitivity if i get surgery?
Finn I know this will turn out perfect for you. No complications, nothing. Your wait will be well worth it! Hey as they say...Good things come to those who wait!!
I started experiencing bladder problems at 42 and it made me feel suicidal. From what I’ve learnt bladder problems are a big risk of both male and female bottom surgeries. Surely it’s better to try to come to terms with the genitals you were born with than risk such horrible side effects? And don't think that bladder problems are minor - they can be life changing!
What age did you transition? You look truly biological, I'm born male and think you look more masculine than me lol. Granted I'm skinny and clean shaven.
We all look different, cis or trans, but we all have one thing in common, we are men regardless of how we look 😊 l was 39 when l started testosterone, a late puberty for me!
FinnTheInfinncible okay but it's still a choice, that's like someone saying "my boob job wasn't a choice because l had dysphoria about my small breasts.. That might be true but it's still a choice.
![KSI - Dirty [Official Visualiser]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/VoDh1h1dPUE/mqdefault.jpg)
**Breaking news!**My Phallo Memoir is Now Available To Buy! : finlaygames.com/my-books/
• Grab a signed copy and other signed goodies here: ko-fi.com/finlaygames/shop
• Detailed phalloplasty discussion and reveal video: ko-fi.com/s/f854c136f2
• Enjoying my content and want to say thanks? Buy me a 'coffee!' : ko-fi.com/finlaygames
Please think extra long and hard about this surgery. When you look online at medical sites, you see that 60% of these operations produce complications that require additional surgeries. In 40% of those 60%, no amount of correction will ever rectify the problem. The biggest problems coming from the urethra. It is not uncommon to have scar tissue build up, making the process of emptying the bladder difficult, also "pockets of pee" can develop at stitch sites that means you end up having to finish passing urine by squeezing it out of collection areas by hand...if a little urine is left in the body, over time, it can collect, harden, producing more restriction, which invites bacteria leading to infection. Is this rare? No, not at all. In the journal Medicine it lists "high rates of complications exist with SRS". It is not out of the norm to end up needing a catheter for the rest of your life. Many transgendered people don't make youtube and Tik-Tok videos showing that they have been reduced to a catheter....because it's not a fun topic and the suicide rates for those post op on a catheter lifelong is higher than normal...and normal in this case after surgery also remains high.
I did think long and hard. This has been a complicated surgery. But now l have completed my surgery and those years of pain and frustration were very worthwhile, to have the body l have today. My penis is a source of joy, it's relieved so much dysphoria, l am able to be intimate with my partner.
It's so important to see and understand both sides of this surgery, there are complications but there are also successes.
For a more balanced view l recommend reading my memoir, Top to Bottom, which you can find here
finlaygames.com/my-books/
Can you orgasm?
I've been going through videos for the past one-week in order to really get and understand how serious the issue of transitioning is and how difficult it is and why, why people would go through such physical changes. This video has answered and cleared my mind. I absolutely wish there was an easier way for you guys, but if this means anything to you and I think it would, people are changing and becoming more accepting. Not only towards trans people, but hopefully towards every section of society. Because what makes us and our kind special is our diversity. So much love and a bear hug for you !
I hope lots and lots of trans men are watching your videos. You're a font of very honest and transparent information, presented in a straightforward and clear manner (with a much-needed touch of humor!) I know you are doing a huge service to many people thinking of transitioning, or in the process of transitioning. Bless you dear. Do you think some of your depression could be caused by sleep deprivation? If you are getting up many times to pee, that could seriously affect your quality of rest and cause mood disorders. HUGS!
So eloquent. So clarifying and demystifying. Right-O, my friend. Carry on.
What lovely comments, thank you so much!
I have been getting this question a lot lately too and was going to make a video on the same topic, but you said it all!
Ta buddy!
Thanks for being so transparent. Im new to this journey, so it helps
Welcome to the journey! Thank you for your kind appreciation!
Um, what is Lamby up to with Unicorn.....?
Being a very naughty ball of fur....
I don't mean this to be offensive, I'm speaking of a place of wanting someone to hurt less. Would it have been easier to just see a psychologist to help cure your gender dysphoria, then to spent all that money and pain on altering your body just to fit your brain? That seems like it's being anti-trans but I'm just trying to think of ways to make people happy without them having to go through so much pain. If you didn't have gender dysphoria anymore, wouldn't you just be happy with the body you were born with? Or am I not understanding
That's basically conversion therapy. There are many practices that try and attempt to do this, the same that attempt to do this to gay people. It's cruel , doesn't work and does immeasurable harm.
When you know your gender, no amount of therapy is going to change that.
You and your videos make me feel better! I love you, Finn!
That is wonderful, mwah!
The surgery might stop but the healing will not, you body is desperately trying to get rid of the non natural parts.
That's completely not true. People have reconstructive surgery all the time and the body does not have a rejection reaction to it as it's our own flesh as blood. False information!
Good to see that you are taking things in stride. I agree be your own advocate when speaking with your doctor. I also understand about having to accept the stage you are at....... the waiting game. You already know because of all of your AA work and such that one of the best things to get by with the struggle is doing and believe in the serenity prayer...... love you sweetheart and always hope you the best......xxxxx god bless
I love how honest you continue to be about things. Thank you. You help me so much
Hello my friend! Thank you for that, it makes me very happy to know I help.
Dear Finn, you are a very special person. In your honest words I can see your power and the indispensability of your previous surgery, to be yourself, in any case. The fight is a part of you, psycologically and phisically and these two things walk togheter in bad and good ways, for everyone. I ezpecially hope your urinary infections resove soon because they are terribly to bear. I send you a big hug as I was there! 😊❣️😊
This meant so much for me to watch. Thank you for opening up like this so honestly. I am having metoidioplasty in February and I feel very similarly to you, but I hear so much anxiety from my loved ones buzzing around me about what-if-so-and-so even though the data suggests that even if I do experience even very serious complications it'll most likely resolve over time, and EVEN IN THE INTERUM I know I will not have the parts that are distressing me and I will feel like I am on the road to actually being able to enjoy living in my body.
Bless you buddy, yes its hard to filter out other peoples fears. Their worries are of course understandable, but for us, there really isnt any option, its not a choice, its a cure and even a scarred body, that doesn't function perfectly, is preferable to the completely wrong parts! This is a tough journey, but if you focus on the mini milestones its a little easier and before you know it, your done!!! Good luck in feb!
Thank you for being so open and honest about this stage in your journey. It has definitely helped me decide to go further with my bottom surgery plans
Comments like your are what makes my sharing feel so worthwhile, thank you!
Thank you so much for this video Finn. You've read my mind how I feel regarding phallo and complications. Great vid!
That's great to hear, thank you so much!
Thank you! You just answered questions i have had before moving on eith my transition. Bless your heart !😎
Ah that makes me happy!
You do a fantastic job of explaining emotions and conveying information. Your vlogs feel like a close friend is telling me about his issues. So here's friending back at you! ..Wishing you happiness.
I absolutely love that comment, thank you so much!
Oooo I agree with this completely. Like grabbing a cup of coffee and catching up with a friend! Love your videos Finn. And your great attitude and smile are contagious. Sending you love from California and wishing you lots of healing so you can get to stage 3.
Finn, you are such an awesome bloke. No matter what happens yes you get down a little bit but then you always find the good in everything. You are so special and in courage so many people. I am soon to be on T and then top surgery but I was afraid to even consider bottom surgery. I had heard so many bad things going wrong with with it that I was like no f***ing way!!!! I don't want to do that and have all those problems, but listening to you has made me realize that no matter what happens its worth it to be complete. So when I get the chance I will have my bottom surgery just because you have given me hope and strength. Love you to the moon and back. And by the way when you say you are such a great catch, you are I would be proud to be with you. I am going to be just as positive as you are. Love you, Lydia actually it's Liam now
You are so articulate and yet why am I not convinced?It seems such a Brutual solution. I actually saw a video of the process and I think it is much more complicated for FTM than MTF with the urinary system and dont forget the following points
Infertility -for very young people this is a huge step most are not prepared for !
Possible life long complications and dependency on doctors to fix it
Artificial Hormones are a health risk.
The use of terminology to make it sound so much less is absurd !
This is a serious procedure and I do think you could have compromised ,after all ut isn't as though you will ever be a real make with a fully functioning penis .It is all an illusion
it is like giving child a teddy bear instead of a parent at night exvwor it is a crocodile
It is a complicated surgery, but the results are much improved than they once were.
It is a risk of course, but for us trans folk it's worth it to end the crippling dysphoria.
And l did indeed compromise, the compromise is having a scar and having to come to terms with the fact that while it can get close to a cis males penis, it will of course never function in the same way.
It most certainly is a penis though, and l am most certainly a man.
Completely agree...
Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts & reflections with us! Great video!
Thank you my friend!
FinnTheInfinncible you’re welcome handsome! 😊
I am so glad you posted this! I am a ftm who did The rff in nov 2016 and since then had had issues with dripping, suprapubis katheter for almost that long and a lotta of up and down regarding peeing and Urinalinfektions that is narrowing the urethra further more and sometimes blocking it completely with stones. Lately i have thought about regretting butik like you I cant regret something that is so wonderful to the selfasteem like that but I usually give the advise to look into what the plans ares when something is wrong after the surgerys. The hardest for me is to be demanding corrections since I am fighting with the feeling that it is a selfmade issue, that so many people ares dying from actual deseases and I'm not.. Love to hear how you concerred those thoughts / Love (its my name actually)
What a wonderful name! Hello my friend. I feel for you and I can relate to your uncomfortability in asking for corrections. Unfortunately, a large chunk of society still view transgender surgery as a choice, as elective surgery, rather than the necessary medical intervention it is. This is then internalised in us, causing us shame and guilt. There is nothing to feel guilty for, dysphoria is a valid condition, being transgender is valid and we, like anyone else who has a debilitating condition, are entitled to seek and receive help. Much love and power to you!
I really like the way you look on things, I live in Sweden and we swedes are known for our passivity and demandlessness. I problaby offend some swedes now by this statement even if im like the rest of them. I am inspired of your ability to have a OpenOffice mind and during the years I have suffered with you and cryed with you as well. I cross my fingers that your complications will come to an end soon, hopefully with everything working like it is ment to /Love
Best video you have made.
Thank you so much!
you got a lot of courage. I got to get spine surgery or doctors say eventually i wont be able to use my arms. Im scared as hell of surgery :( for me any surgery is terrifying :(
That sounds absoluely terrifying my friend. I was scared too, we can never know the full outcome of surgery, here are always risks. All we can do is look at the statistics, look at other peoples experiences, and weigh up whether the risks will be worth it and ask ourselves if our lives will be improved by his surgery and thus worth the risk? The answer for me was yes, which is how in the end I found the courage. Sending much love and strength your way
@@FinnTheInfinncible Thank you for your kind words friend. I really appreciate it. I wish I had your emotional strength. Thank you and please enjoy your weekend.
Glad to see your face, 😊. Love that when you smile you smile with your eyes.
Thank you so much :)
In spite of your depression it is amazing your clarity! A testament to the real truth of being a transgender person.. Finn you are an inspiration 😊😘
Thank you so much. That's incredibly kind
i was wondering how much lower surgery ended up costing for you in total? what did the nhs cover?
The NHS funds the surgery itself. I paid out of pocket for travel to appointments, overnight stays before surgeries, medicaines and dressings, but you can get some help with that f you are on a low income.
This came at a good time. I’m having so many issues post stage one and keep getting messed around, my life feels so much like it’s on hold and my long term relationship broke down and I just want to get on with life.
I’m still struggling and am having the hard debate to not proceed. I feel like London are too flippant and don’t take issues seriously until too late, and I don’t feel I can trust them anymore.
I wish I had your resolve and patience.
Don't speak for everyone dude. Some of the complications can be permanent and there are people who would rather not go through all that, and people who have regrets about doing it. This is surgery, and it's a very individual thing. Just because you don't regret it doesn't mean others don't. I'm happy for you and but don't want other people jumping in without thinking properly and actually end up wih something permanent for the rest of their lives they do regret.
If you watch my videos, you'll know that I give a very honest and balanced view of the good and bad of surgery and l always stress that I speak from my own experience. Never , in any videos do l say I'm speaking for everyone, or say this surgery is complication free , or encourage people to have it.
Always look forward to your videos :) Keep your chin up lovey xoxo
Thank you my dear friend!
I'm a trans guy, I'm young, haven't started any transition. But getting a bottom surgery is too scary for me. I also feel like I'm content with my genitalia... just achieving other more masculine traits and passing easier might make me happier... I experience dysphoria but I also try to disassociate the bottom dysphoria away and find other resolutions to ease it.
I kinda feel insecure when speaking with other trans men, especially men who got bottom surgeries. You seem so happy! But am I adequate and valid for not wanting a bottom surgery?
Of course you are my friend. Everyone walks a different journey and that does not make you any less male. Do what is right for you
thank you so much for replying, i really needed to hear this right now.... i hope you are doing well!
You’re making the right choice. GRS is a HUGE COMMITMENT where so much can go wrong.
Hi, I was wondering what the outlook for the "dripping" problem is. Isn't it something that would kind of get better over time? It wouldn't be nice to have to put up with wearing pads forever, but is there no other way of managing the problem? Keeping on having surgery in that area could lead to other problems. I really hope you get this sorted properly.
For some trans folks, dripping doesnt happen, however, due to the way we need to be reconfigured with our urthral pipe being rerouted, dripping does often happen as we dont have the same pelvic muscle set up as cis men do, meaning we cant use those muscles to push the last bit of wee out. Saying that though, many cis men also have an issue with dripping, so its not just trans guys! Usuall, its just a spot that dribbles out after peeing, with good technique it can be eliminated. Mine is so much beter now. Heres an update! ruclips.net/video/k7HDjPzCzbc/видео.html
@@FinnTheInfinncible Thank you so much for your reply. I've watched the update you recommended and it's good to hear from an older, more sensible guy and without all the over the top joking around that there is from the younger set. Some of us are older and didn't have the advantage of the openness of today. You're a good fella and I have enjoyed (is that the right word?) your informative videos. 👍
Yes that's the right word! I'm so glad you find my vids helpful. I agree with you, l too found it hard to find people my own age to relate to, which is why l started my own channel. I love to help and pay forward from those who kindly helped me. Thanks for your lovely comments!
You're an inspiration
And you are so kind :)
I heart you! And, what is lamby doing to his unicorn? ;-) haha
Ah, I heart you too! And I think Lamby is trying to...er......ride the Unicorn....he gets up to so much mischief when Im not watching....
HA!!!
Good for you!!! I'm almost tearing up listening to you talk. Im laying in bed right now at GRS Montreal. Im mtf and I had vaginoplasty. I'm so happy I don't have to deal with my flappy balls anymore. It feels pretty nice down there now.
This is amazing! A giganticly huge congratulations to you! Im sending a very gentle hug and all the best for a speedy and uncomplcated recovery!
@@FinnTheInfinncible Thank you so much 💜 I really appreciate the support. I'm just laying in bed waiting for the nurse to come take out my stent. My butt is stitched together and it hurts 🤕
@@RupturedCatalyst420x oh bless you 💜 the pain in early days is awful. I questioned my decision a few times! Just remember to not be a hero, ask for pain meds, and keep on top of them. Also, remember to breathe! We often shallow breathe when we are in pain, and that limits oxygen and ups the stress hormones. Take some nice slow deep breaths. This helps to get lots of oxygen in which not only helps with healing but also switches your body into parasympathetic nervous system functioning, releasing lots of pain releasing endorphins too 💜
@@FinnTheInfinncible That is some amazing advice. I finally got back home and im an emotional mess right now. I also just found out im moving around march 1st. I was offered a low income appartment from CMHA(Canadian Mental Health Association). Im pretty stressed though and i dont want to move. But i think its time i get my own place. Also dilating is such a chore right now, im not exactly enjoying it. Minus the fact im pretty much taking care of myself even though my dad said he would, but hes sick now, and my roomie said he would but hes just an idiot. So yeah... I appreciate the support. Thank you
I'm thinking people with small packages might choose a bigger one that leaks a little. So I'm happy you're content with your surgery. My comment is out of no where lol just something that came to mind while watching.
Seeing other's comments got me thinking of anyone with a leak had gotten mitrofanoff or suprapubic surgeries!
im a teenage ftm and your videos makes me so excited about the future when i cant even imagine to live tomorrow. thank you.
Bless you buddy, thank you so much. Hang on in, it gets better!
Keep up the good work would like to meet soon
It's true that there are a lot of cis people out there that don't understand what motivates the decision of trans people to want to enrich their lives and make their lives meaningful by having surgeries as treatment for dysphoria. On the other hand, there are cis people out there who understand the concept that surgery is definitely the way to go as a very good treatment for dysphoria.
I personally think that cis people that don't get it really need to take the time to stop and educate themselves. It would open up a new world of knowledge if they did.
The things that trans people want and what cis people want aren't that different in the way that we all want meaningful lives. It's just that everybody's life is different, and so we all need different things that make our lives meaningful. In saying that, I've also learnt that every trans person is different too. Some trans people who experience dysphoria choose to have surgery to treat the symptoms, while other trans people medically don't feel they require to go down that path.
As you say, and as I've learnt through reading and listening, dysphoria has been known to take lives and that is really a horrible thing to have happen. I am just so glad for all the people that experience dysphoria that surgery is available to help with that. I definitely get it.
I really like this video, because the more that people talk about it and have conversations the more people are going to learn. So keep doing what your doing Finn, you're amazing!
And I agree that for anyone wanting to achieve anything for themselves, all we can ever do is our very best and that is good enough xxx
Bless you, yes it is exaclt this, we (Trans folk) are no different to anyone else. All we want is to be happy and whole. Its just the case that for us, that often means hormones and surgery. Thank you for always being an amazing ally
Thank you for your comment. It's easy for me to be supportive because I understand that dysphoria is a genuine state of being that really can effect quality of life for some people who experience it, and I would want them to be able to feel happy and whole. And if there is a means to be able to do that then it's a good thing. All it takes is to stop for a moment and put yourself in someone else's shoes and understand how hard it would be from that person's point of view. We all experience pain that we strive to work through, and overcome, it just looks different for each of us. Take away the labels and we all come under the same umbrella at the end of the day, of being human. Thank you for being such a supportive person too xx
I would really love to know about your sensitivity during sex, is it the same? better? worse than before your surgery pleasure wise because i’m in need of an asnwer to decide if i will have the same sensitivity if i get surgery?
Finn I know this will turn out perfect for you. No complications, nothing. Your wait will be well worth it! Hey as they say...Good things come to those who wait!!
Love this! Thank you!
What about your arm it doesnt bother u?
Not at all. I've had no issues with my arm, it's healed incredibly well, the scar barely shows , and I have it tattooed now.
lots of love!
And to you!
I started experiencing bladder problems at 42 and it made me feel suicidal. From what I’ve learnt bladder problems are a big risk of both male and female bottom surgeries. Surely it’s better to try to come to terms with the genitals you were born with than risk such horrible side effects? And don't think that bladder problems are minor - they can be life changing!
You are just too gorgeous!
Aw thank you!!!
Love you I do x x x missed you xx
I suppose as long as you’re happy.
Exactly. If a person is happy, be happy for them!
' I love my penis, I love him' best sentence ever :@)
P's keep being amazing
It is a little strange to declare a love of ones penis but l do love him! Having not had him for very long I'm never taking him for granted!
What age did you transition? You look truly biological, I'm born male and think you look more masculine than me lol. Granted I'm skinny and clean shaven.
We all look different, cis or trans, but we all have one thing in common, we are men regardless of how we look 😊 l was 39 when l started testosterone, a late puberty for me!
There you r happy again. Love when that happens 😉
Bless you!
Wow What a nice guy.
I wouldn't mind if you were angry about your failed operation
I would love to cuddle you better.
Think you are one sexy dude.
Oh how blooming lovely!
Awesome!!
Lol "I love my willy"
I'm sorry but how was it not a choice???
That makes no sense
Because it wasn't a choice. In order to treat the dysphoria l have, it was the only option.
FinnTheInfinncible okay but it's still a choice, that's like someone saying "my boob job wasn't a choice because l had dysphoria about my small breasts..
That might be true but it's still a choice.
:D
so, you only got phalloplasty in order to be able to pee standing up?
No not at all , its just that Im having an issue with that aspect at the moment
but having a non functioning penis isnt gonna make you more dysphoric than you already are?
Bravo
Thank you!