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Wonderful to learn more about Claire's process, great collaboration 😊

Lovely stream, You and Claire and the group were Grand. Had to catch up later. Last week was 1st time. Loving all the Fury people and Hydra and her Little ones 🌟🌈💫💫💫💫💫💫💫💫 Sorry not only Auti after sixty, but also dyslexic. (So challenging on communication ) Thank you all for being there. So relate to having to stand and wait for things. Have got through a lot of gas hob kettles. Same as you with the washing machine. Even managed to burn the barn down when I had a cloths dryer. While I was an hour away from home. Had to go to France the ne t day. Never had another since. Went and joined Woodshed after last week.

Yay, Claire was a great mystery guest! the Hydration units are getting bigger every day. Thanks for another fun live steam!

I love everything my phone does except the Call function. Now that’s Autistic AF!!

I was once hit with a “you couldn’t be autistic because you can tie your shoelaces!”

I can't believe I've heard all of those lmao, I had to be high functioning and masked almost everything, people just think it doesn't exist if a person doesn't act like the stereotypes show

Any song containing the word "fluff" gets my vote 😽

I'd only call Count Duckula on your mallard phone.

My aunt is certain that autism doesn't run in our family. Guess I was adopted.

Phone calls are just the worst.

So validating. I don't even realize how alone I feel until I feel the relief when you're acting out how this feels. Something that feels related to me is autocorrect. I had to turn it off and now I just deal with my typos bc being corrected wrongly and having to correct THAT caused me so much rage. It's easier/less exhausting to just edit my own mistakes.

Oh gosh this is me😮phone sounds like a 5 alarm siren I avoid like the plague…hearing is a bit difficult due to processing…it’s so hard to explain this to people…

Yes, very much relate. The anxiety...the fearful, weighty gaps in conversation...the question of when is it my turn to speak? The moment of realizing that oops...that wasn't it...When I am making a call, they go much as you demonstrated. I have a script but it gets scrambled in my flustered state. Or I rattle off the things I practiced so fast they request a repeat. Then, add the embarrassment as I try desperately to access what I need to repeat. My go-to is text or e-mail. Not all can or will do this, but most who know me will.

I'm tempted to record a voicemail "418 I'm a teapot" With no other explanation ofcourse. Possibly in a generated somewhat robotic voice. The people I would like to answer would understand and leave a message, the others will probably hang up.

I worked in a call centre for 12 years. That was over a decade ago and I still avoid the phone like the plague.

I have more of an e-mail anxiety than a phone call anxiety. 🙃🙃🙃

Great video Mike :). Unexpected calls are very triggering. After i started unmasking more I just let it ring and turn the volume down. It helps a little🙂👍

I work with people who love calling for whatever reason. I hate it. When I get a work IM asking if I have time for a call, I try to steer it to staying in IM. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't, but when my personal phone rings!?!?! Unless it's from a member of family, it's a simple "Hell no, I ain't answering that"...

I spent years working in customer service, comms and sales jobs and let's just say it was traumatic at times 😩

I find Phone calls invasive, there is no real permission to call.

8:02 And that is why customer relations at big tech companies suck. The people with the answers do not want to talk to you. Do you, as a software developer know what your customs are having problems with? I know I struggle with the touch and gesture based GUI and well as the layout and graphic representation of icons. I have no idea where anything is, where I look isn't where it is and that's if I am able identify the icon as an icon and not a graphic. The text keeps getting smaller and smaller to the point the default font size is nearly impossible for me to read. I can go into the accessibility settings and make it bigger, however not all UI elements scale with the text, causing graphical errors. The lack of an "intuitive" ui means I'm sure I have no idea what half of my phone is capable. Now I'm sure most of y'all nerds out there are confused by that and some of y'all might be yelling at your phone about how I just can't appreciate the sublime algorithmic expressions in the code or the harmonious perfection of the aesthetic qualities of the whatever all y'all's specialty is. But that's the problem, I and almost everyone else doesn't know and in most cases doesn't care what any of that is. I want a phone to send and receive voice and video calls as well as text and images messages. Modern smartphones are both better and worse at this. There are so many apps that do those simple things I want that there should be no problem, but there is. That problem is there is little to know cross community communications. This leads to social media islands and these islands are self selecting for social traits. The comment section of every site has its own unique online community. For instance, If you look as the posting habits of users from various sites such as; 4chan, tumblr, Reddit, Myspace, Facebook,AIM, ICQ, Discord, X, Quora, Stack Overflow, Indeed, Telegram, Instagram, Twitch, Truth social, Gab, Bitchute, Tik tok, Vine, Dailymotion RUclips, Rumble, blogger, flicker, GitHub, Habbo, Minds, Newgrounds, Pinterest, Snapchat, SoundCloud, Steam, The Well, Wordpress, WhatsApp, Linkedin, Skype, Vivo, Geocities, Frienster, LiveJournal and so many more. All of these sites have and had their own social dynamics. Do you know any. Were or are you in any? The history of internet culture is being forgotten as well as erase. All that is being archives is names, dates and versions of technologies, companies and developers. Do any of you know why, where, when or why you favorite memes and stories come from? Lost media is old memes that hopefully in some long forgotten storage device in a closet. Every time an old storage device is destroyed, cultural meaning is lost. I want you to imagine a world where J. K. Rowling never published and she threw away the computer it was on. There would be no Harry Potter. How many Harry Potters, Hunger Games and The Martians have we lost? Does anyone care?

I can right now put on my big boy pants and go out and buy socks, does not change that I feel anxiety about the situation, especially since I have no support, so either I buy those socks or I go without. You don't DEFEAT anxiety... You SUFFER in SILENCE, something the ND community has to do way to much and it leads to trauma.

Phone calls are the absolute worst. The number of times people on the other side have asked me if I'm still there... I also ask for emails and my voice message does so too, because the chances of me answering it are pretty darn low.

Again you've put into words feelings that ive had my whole life but have never been able to name/describe. I'm terrible at taking meeting notes. My brain really, really wants to write down every single word said...even though I fully understand that that's unnecessary and counterproductive. A video on Autistic AF note taking would be glorious.

"I may be autistic." "Yes, I know, I have already compiled 53 clues pointing towards that. Would you like them listed chronologically or alphabetically?"

I'm still traumatized from a phone call I made to AOL 20 years ago lol. What I thought would be a polite 5-minute call to cancel my subscription turned into an all-out war with an extremely aggressive rep who was determined to get me to stay with the service at any cost. Horrifying.

Brilliant video, Mike! Crazy kitty socks hand puppets?! Yay!!!! Fun, unmasked, pure Autistic joy - i love it! And those snuggly Hydrates ..... simply purr-fect 🐱❤

0:39: I’m sorry but why dose he care when she had her kid ? It’s completely unnecessary for the story…

Take a call center job lmao youll only leave totally uncomprehensible voice mails ten percent of the time.

Can't believe that pastor what horrible heavyweight shepherding!!!

And I thought that was just me!

When I have no choice but to make a call I type up the script and read it off my computer screen which has reduced the initial stress a great deal. Every other call is made for me by Mr Vicar...

The roaring kitten at the end ❤❤❤

Thank you so much for raising this topic. For me as a blind person it's the complete opposite. Writing in Braille was my main communication whilst growing up and, when we learnt to type we couldn't read back what we wrote. Consequently, talking is everything. Even now, when I have a computer with text to speech and Braile, writing is somewhat untrustworthy because I can't hear the tone of someone's voice, can't get an immediate reaction, but can so easily be ignored because the individual can simply delete my communication if they choose. For me, writing is a means to an end whilst hearing the voice of a friend or loved one and talking back to them is life. Writing is so visual and I have days when I'm allergic to visual. On the other hand, I don't answer the door if I'm not expecting a visitor and I don't necessarily like having my camera on in a video call. However, my reaction to the unexpected ringing of the phone is usually 'Bugger off'; but, having been rigorously trained to answer the phone I've had to train myself out of it and I feel so much more in control. What I love about channels like yours, and my good mate Quinn's, is that you widen and challenge my thinking, - about others and about myself.

i hate being autistic

I also have 2 phones and no customer or colleague has my private number. From 6 pm till 8 am my work phone is on Do Not Disturb, coz I didn't sign a 24/7 contract... But when it comes to work calls:I don't mind making calls as those are planned, and I know what I'm going to say (scripting galore!) and in some cases I don't mind customer phoning me as I know they're going call... see scripting. The unexpected calls however raise my anxiety levels immediately: there goes the focus + I don't know what to say. I can fall back on some standard scenarios that I've worked out (if then else) It's, however, anything but easy.

I feel like the duck phone would help make it seem more fun, does it quack as the ringer? Lol

Phones get me pretty hard. Between listening to something that isn't there and trying to filter out what is where I am I tend to get lost. Audio processing is not my strong suit.

I'd be interested in your note taking video...

Why do you think that I always send text messages instead of calling. The NT people I know never get it: I don't like calling and I almost hate calling. The only way is text messaging. But I like to talk to people face-to-face. Just no calling. The NT's don't even try to understand me, they want to call me. If I don't answer they feel rejected. 🥱😴

Alexander Graham Bell was autistic (apparently). In the words of Alanis Morissette 'Isn't that ironic...' 😊

Hearing a phone spikes my nervous system so hard. My phone is always on do not disturb and vibrate with only my kids as pass through allow and they know how it impacts me so they typically text if possible as an advance so I can call them vs the spike from that instant demand. It didn’t always used to be this way. It can be progressive this autonomic nervous system fight or flight mode response. I have the same response to anything entering my Peripheral space. I can KNOW someone or something is approaching and still I have a jump startle response once the person or item enters a certain proximity. It can be funny. But sometimes it makes me cry. Crying laughing emoji’s kinda help… but still then I have to find ways to calm my nervous system which is suddenly on high alert which impacts my whole body and brain. There are studies that suggest that this is evidence of early childhood neurons not pruning from the infancy state where a high alert is necessary for survival. And there are studies that show neuron pruning at typical developmental stages can be slowed or not occur. Idk. But it’s a thing for me. Once on high alert from the startle response my brain doesn’t process well to talk on the phone. Raddled and addled mode. “Hi, I’m Chineese”… yas 😂😂😂😂 In person communication is much better. Video still challenging due to background noise challenges and delayed visual processing. I truly enjoy chance occasional one on one encounters while out and about. Just don’t walk up behind me and set off the startle response unless you enjoy that kind of jump scare and making old ladies cry😢

And the end then made me nearly cry of joy. How cute they are😻! And they already opened their eyes, awwww! And the yawning😍 The sweetest!!!!

GREAT topic Mike. I've always struggled with phone calls. Thanks for enumerating the reasons they are so challenging for autistic / monotropic folks. The "bomb going off" is an apt metaphor for the experience in my case. Caller ID helps. Perhaps assigning pleasant, non-jarring ring-tones to people you actually enjoy talking with might help too. Let everything else go to voicemail. Silently. If there's an emergency, tell them to dial 911. As far video calls - they are just as bad for me. Maybe worse. It's the surprise aspect I find most challenging to unscheduled social interactions like calls. The other issue is that fewer social communication channels are available to us understand the meaning of the interaction. It's like putting earmuffs on a blind person, except that our senses for non-verbal channels tend to be less acute and require more concentration to process. A tiny glitchy, low-res, thumbnail of a person delayed by latency and muddied by poor lighting and spectacularly BAD audio? It's like Zoom was designed to cause autistic meltdowns and shutdowns. Scheduling calls in advance is the best way to avoid the distress they cause. If I know it's coming and it's from someone I enjoy talking to, that's great. Another thing I find difficult with phone calls is knowing when and how to END them. Having a script or series of scripts for how to do do this would really help, as would setting a limit for time - 5 minutes, 10 minutes, etc. Otherwise I tend to get sucked into hour long conversations. Initiating calls is problematic because I have EMPATHY, and assume that the people I wasn't to call find phone calls just as distressing as I DO lol. This is a theory of mind issue I suppose, In my mind, NOT calling someone out of the blue is the most THOUGHTFUL and compassionate thing I can do. NTs don't see it that way I guess, lol... Texting is perfect because it's asynchronous. I can compose my thoughts, and send and respond when I'm able, and so can they. Email is similar, but more cumbersome and formal. Still better than phone or video communication. Ultimately I prefer one on one, face to face social interaction. This has it's own issues, but I find that I have fewer misunderstandings and more productive interactions in person, alone with other people. Groups of people are social death sentences for me. Too many variables, unspoken dynamics, and especially, competition for dominance and pecking order rank. I'm f*ked in group interactions unless I'm leading or at the center. which is probably why I became a teacher and later a musician. It's not about ego, it's about avoiding confusion, sensory overload, bullying and ostracization. Thanks again. This topic deserves more attention

Not a wooden duck-telephone🤣🤣🤣 Just started the video to have company eating my strawberries with vegan vanillaghurt and some nut-granola and nearly died laugh-choking.

3 cheers for the Hydrates! Great video idea, Mike! That flash of dread when the phone rings is unmistakable, even when it's someone you know. My grandmother used to hand me the phone to talk to cousins all the time.

*Ring Ring* stares at phone for the remainder of it ringing, feeling completely shocked and trying to create the conversation in my head before we have it. Leaves it 2mins tells the person I’ll call back after *whatever* and never call. Loses more friends and family but alas mental peace.

Ok, but I think you ARE Chinese because you pronounced my username correctly in a live stream.

Mike this was a good one. I love that Quinn & you are always up to something behind the scenes to surprise us. Hope you all made it to the end for the kitty yawn. hUgz from Ohio, Lee