Shots Fired... by elspawno | Humans are space Orcs | HFY | TFOS1029

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  • Опубликовано: 8 янв 2025

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  • @ashbrea381
    @ashbrea381 3 года назад +326

    The moment I heard them say that even the others across the room started getting sick, I thought: 'Someone crop-dusted the aliens.'

    • @BrunoMaricFromZagreb
      @BrunoMaricFromZagreb 3 года назад +15

      Elaborate on that,from what I do know a crop-duster would be a type of tool no?

    • @brianmeans5965
      @brianmeans5965 3 года назад +38

      @@BrunoMaricFromZagreb a crop duster fart is a fart that spreads across a room like a crop duster spreads material across the field.

    • @admiralglenn2323
      @admiralglenn2323 3 года назад +20

      @@BrunoMaricFromZagreb in basic someone walks by people while farting, like a crop duster spreading manure.

    • @BrunoMaricFromZagreb
      @BrunoMaricFromZagreb 3 года назад +10

      @@brianmeans5965 Oh,that almost makes sense?

  • @andythepanhead
    @andythepanhead 3 года назад +240

    You squirrel coughing, nanite swarm infested, smooth talking rogue. Ya had me going. Really going. I just sat on the edge of my seat for 20 minutes for a fart joke....well done.

    • @henrypaleveda7760
      @henrypaleveda7760 3 года назад +19

      the last person to do that was When Asimov ended the Foundation series with a dick joke.

    • @BrunoMaricFromZagreb
      @BrunoMaricFromZagreb 3 года назад +7

      @@henrypaleveda7760 You mean SCP foundation?I don't follow the lore at all cause the size is intimidating,you might've spoiled something I could've been looking forward to...

    • @henrypaleveda7760
      @henrypaleveda7760 3 года назад +9

      @@BrunoMaricFromZagreb No. Issac Asimov wrote a science fiction series called "FOUNDATION" which was about the fall and resurgence of humanity's empire in the galaxy.

    • @BrunoMaricFromZagreb
      @BrunoMaricFromZagreb 3 года назад +7

      @@henrypaleveda7760 OOOOOHHHH I don't have the ability to be interested in those.I just don't read actual phisical books,and none of his are sold around me.
      But ending his series like that is such a power move,I wish more creators would be willing to stop taking themselves so seriously.

    • @henrypaleveda7760
      @henrypaleveda7760 3 года назад +7

      @@BrunoMaricFromZagreb the last line of the book is "It wouldn't have made a difference; I didn't take to calling myself "Mule" because of my nose." The villain in the last part is called "The Mule"

  • @dwavenminer
    @dwavenminer 3 года назад +144

    Gives new meaning to 'silent but deadly'.

    • @MrBishop077
      @MrBishop077 3 года назад +8

      The Hydrogen Sulfide component of farts (rotten eggs smell) is noticeable around 0.01ppm and grows in intensity till it becomes a disgusting sweet smell at 30ppm. Above 100ppm One rapidly losses the ability to smell it due to Olfactory fatigue/paralysis. Concentrations of 1000ppm to 2000ppm and above can cause near instant Death to humans. Truly Silent But[t] Deadly. 😶💩☠ 😱

    • @kirkjones9639
      @kirkjones9639 3 года назад +2

      Celar, Celans, Mortalis.

    • @jadesidhe2634
      @jadesidhe2634 2 года назад +2

      There's another hfy actually called silent but deadly . It's along these same lines. It's read by either agro or net narrator

    • @dragonriderabens9761
      @dragonriderabens9761 Год назад

      I WAS THINKING THE SAME THING XD

  • @MrHuntingClaw
    @MrHuntingClaw 3 года назад +110

    That must have been a buttload of shots fired, kinda surprised the other people in that room didn't smell anything strange if it was THAT bad.

    • @BrunoMaricFromZagreb
      @BrunoMaricFromZagreb 3 года назад +13

      The dying xeno was more attention-grabbing.

    • @calvingreene90
      @calvingreene90 3 года назад +3

      That POS constant farting was usual.

    • @TheMonkey747
      @TheMonkey747 2 года назад +3

      Isn't methane odorless? The main 'scent' is hydrogen sulfide... apparently the xenos are fine with that compound...

    • @alganhar1
      @alganhar1 2 года назад +4

      @@TheMonkey747 Methane is yes, natural gas used for cooking and heating in homes and the like have extra compounds to give the distinctive smell. The methane itself though is as you said odourless.

    • @nunya3163
      @nunya3163 2 года назад

      @@alganhar1 Correct, the rotten egg smell in natural gas, comes from sulfur added for safety, so that people will sense the leak.

  • @elfeater1760
    @elfeater1760 3 года назад +123

    Outstanding and original idea for a story. Thank you Agro for the reading.

    • @AgroSquerril
      @AgroSquerril  3 года назад +11

      A pleasure , glad you enjoyed

  • @rhulyon5728
    @rhulyon5728 3 года назад +225

    Why is this file labeled: "Contingency plan: Fart gun"?

  • @silvadelshaladin
    @silvadelshaladin 3 года назад +86

    Looks like the kind of silly thing that could be overlooked.

  • @norrasmedjegatan
    @norrasmedjegatan 3 года назад +66

    Liked this one. A bit like "Murder she wrote" with Jessica Fletcher.

    • @JosephKano
      @JosephKano 3 года назад +1

      The Cabot Cove Butcher who would murder people then come up with clever ways to blame others. Very interesting serial killer that one.

    • @LordGertz
      @LordGertz 3 года назад

      @@JosephKano That is so not true, it was just her misfortune to live in such a murderous hellhole. Don't blame the elderly Deathworlder because she lives on a Deathworld in one of its more deadly cities.

  • @jasonswearingin1009
    @jasonswearingin1009 3 года назад +38

    I laughed so hard in the last 2 minutes of this story that I involuntarily lobbed a few air biscuits.

  • @henrypaleveda7760
    @henrypaleveda7760 3 года назад +64

    with how harsh the diplomat was being, I figured something was up, but I didn't think a porcelain breaker would have been behind it. ;P

    • @BrunoMaricFromZagreb
      @BrunoMaricFromZagreb 3 года назад +1

      Porcelain breaker!Haven't heard that one!Might use it sometime...AND YES
      That damned fucking diplomat needs to be pegged by the angriest,biggest horsecock in the solar system,have all his joints broken,incinerated,then left in some forgotten forrested fitch where a thousand flies will infest his armpits under the scorching rays of the Sun!

    • @chrome7657
      @chrome7657 3 года назад +1

      My aunt broke a toilet with farts

    • @BrunoMaricFromZagreb
      @BrunoMaricFromZagreb 3 года назад +2

      @@chrome7657 Calm down buddie,this isn't a competition.
      But if it was you /your aunt'd win.

  • @erikagehm2805
    @erikagehm2805 3 года назад +13

    Middle school level humor yep. Middle school level humor taken up to adult life yep. Chef kiss.

  • @nocount7517
    @nocount7517 3 года назад +43

    Sometimes, you get sulfur dioxide in a fart, namely from onions, garlic, beans, and broccoli.

    • @kokofan50
      @kokofan50 3 года назад +9

      And if that mixes with water in a membrane, it could do damage to something sensitive.

    • @littlekong7685
      @littlekong7685 3 года назад +5

      I was going to say, you get methane from simple bio degrading plant matter. Any life supporting planet would have SOME in the atmosphere, sulphur dioxide on the other hand, a little rarer.

    • @timothyblazer1749
      @timothyblazer1749 Год назад

      Trace H2S too. Assuming a umm....serious problem has...OCCURED...

  • @jesseamaya4413
    @jesseamaya4413 3 года назад +21

    Oh thank you for this one. Nearly died laughing, especially at the poor general having to explain the source of the toxins...
    On a more serious note, I can ABSOLUTELY see something like this happening.

  • @s.c.p0
    @s.c.p0 3 года назад +17

    "we started a dust up" ..... well thats gotta be it right?
    thats even better XD

  • @-cheezu-
    @-cheezu- 3 года назад +35

    My god thank those nanite swarms, i needed that laugh

  • @kurtismiller9544
    @kurtismiller9544 3 года назад +21

    ROFL SBD silent but Deadly! What a honker, damn geese, I thought I smelled something fowl.. er... Foul. LoL

  • @calvingreene90
    @calvingreene90 3 года назад +9

    There was a moment I thought the security dust was the problem.

    • @Chokah
      @Chokah 3 года назад +1

      Me too.

  • @karasuchrono
    @karasuchrono 3 года назад +14

    I almost made it here on time. Had to rewind a bit. FTA~!
    Finished watching. Nearly died at the ending. Christ.

  • @sonicx059
    @sonicx059 3 года назад +55

    Butt quake... first time hearing that. Also what toes DS rep mean? Overall I can say, you're one of the few youtubers I actively look forward to and willing try to catch your premeres.... I take that back. By few, I mean you're one of 2 people I look forward to.

    • @EllenbergW
      @EllenbergW 3 года назад +15

      Diplomatic Service would be my guess

    • @BrunoMaricFromZagreb
      @BrunoMaricFromZagreb 3 года назад +8

      You should also check Zren + his friend who did Empyrean Iris narration (willow something,can't remmember),Net Narrator,and recently I found a timid-voiced fellow who does "those days with the monsters" called A GOOD BEAN.Happy browsing.

    • @bathroomprophet2310
      @bathroomprophet2310 3 года назад

      @@BrunoMaricFromZagreb never heard of bean , thanks will check them out too.

    • @basrengangetch.2042
      @basrengangetch.2042 3 года назад +1

      @@BrunoMaricFromZagreb ahh, diamond willow? She rarely upload but if she did, it'll be a blast

    • @BrunoMaricFromZagreb
      @BrunoMaricFromZagreb 3 года назад

      @@basrengangetch.2042 When I was watching her vids she responded frequently to comments.

  • @Elyseon
    @Elyseon Год назад

    That pompous attache needed a trip out the airlock. Of course he'd be responsible and try to blame everyone else.

  • @9LiveEmpire
    @9LiveEmpire 3 года назад +6

    Shoot fired? I would Say bombe drop with a payload of mustard gaz x3

  • @charlesmclain6558
    @charlesmclain6558 3 года назад +2

    Farts are all fun and games till they put someone into a coma

  • @lasandrenstormewalker5432
    @lasandrenstormewalker5432 8 месяцев назад

    This is the third time I've listened to the story when it gets to the end and you always have me laughing my ass off of it

  • @sillerbarly4927
    @sillerbarly4927 3 года назад +3

    As they say, he who denyied it supplied it

  • @HexenkoeniginVonAngmar
    @HexenkoeniginVonAngmar 3 года назад +3

    I expected capsaicin, but this was hilarious xD

  • @bna5590
    @bna5590 3 года назад +2

    Silent, but deathly.

  • @JimmyJoeBob
    @JimmyJoeBob 2 года назад

    Drink everytime that the diplomatic attache asks to speak to someone's manager.

  • @johnjohnjohnson7720
    @johnjohnjohnson7720 3 года назад +5

    Krell are incredibly weak to methane. Ill use that info in a war if needed.

  • @LordDarkmind16
    @LordDarkmind16 3 года назад +5

    Silent, but deadly!

  • @arakheno4051
    @arakheno4051 3 года назад +2

    For the Squerrils!

  • @fartothesouth
    @fartothesouth Год назад +1

    oh man, here I am, listening to this story in the dark, trying with all my strenght not to laugh too hard, as to wake up wife next to me, pure genius !!!!

  • @garysprandel1817
    @garysprandel1817 Год назад

    The attache will be forever known as he who dealt it.

  • @discusmaximus
    @discusmaximus 10 месяцев назад

    For the Author(s), for the narrator Agro Squirrel, for the algorithm !!!

  • @TheDrag0nsoldier
    @TheDrag0nsoldier 2 года назад

    So literally 'Silent but Deadly'. What fun

  • @claws2129
    @claws2129 3 года назад +1

    I laughed entirely too hard at the end. I needed that.

  • @d3AdLyf3
    @d3AdLyf3 3 года назад +2

    my spine is pretty bad today, spams are just too terrible. i have to restart this to hear it all again but phew thank god i had it ty ty ty

    • @AgroSquerril
      @AgroSquerril  3 года назад +1

      Hope it gets better , enjoy the laughs

    • @johnnycampbell3422
      @johnnycampbell3422 3 года назад +1

      Been there (or similar). Hope it gets better for you. Best regards.

  • @herrh4ppy
    @herrh4ppy Месяц назад

    Hahaha
    The Synonyms for fart!
    priceless joke twist 🤣

  • @kalskirata42
    @kalskirata42 3 года назад +2

    Talk about a disasster

  • @draconusspiritus1037
    @draconusspiritus1037 Год назад

    From the first few minutes I suspected a gas attack. Was not disappointed.

  • @robertbemis9800
    @robertbemis9800 3 года назад +2

    I really though that it would be the spices in the air that did it

    • @joseph1150
      @joseph1150 3 года назад +1

      Indian food is deadly when it's still being cooked.

  • @Grim-HEX
    @Grim-HEX 3 года назад +2

    this... this somehow seems... plausible

  • @CaptainShield
    @CaptainShield Год назад

    The Shart Heard Across the Galaxy!

  • @TheJMPD
    @TheJMPD 5 месяцев назад

    I was thinking that the lieutenant was wearing perfume, and that caused the problem.
    Little did I know that it was a different kind of "perfume" 😂

  • @allenmorgan1007
    @allenmorgan1007 3 года назад +2

    For the Algorithm, For the Author(s), For the Disembodied Voice!

    • @AgroSquerril
      @AgroSquerril  3 года назад

      For the algorithm

    • @Chokah
      @Chokah 3 года назад

      For the butt quake!

  • @VadulTharys
    @VadulTharys 3 года назад +2

    Every Marine office IS a jarhead ground pounder in disguise! That is what makes them so very good at their jobs. Oh and on a different note. Why do marines have leather collars? To form an airtight seal when they screw on their jarheads.

  • @ashanks7731
    @ashanks7731 3 года назад +2

    How did I see that this was gonna be the result at the start of the video.

  • @almar8874
    @almar8874 3 года назад +1

    Silent, but deadly.

  • @thefoxtrotter0130
    @thefoxtrotter0130 3 года назад +1

    I love this it gos into the details of basic human biology interfering with basic alien nature

  • @onemoregodrejected9369
    @onemoregodrejected9369 3 года назад +2

    Now is human farts
    ...

  • @turbopokey
    @turbopokey 3 года назад +1

    Trouser sneeze! Silent but deadly! 🤢😵

  • @scoundral2995
    @scoundral2995 2 года назад

    For bless Whitaker’s vocabulary on farts.

  • @IRMentat
    @IRMentat 3 года назад

    quite the diplomatic menu.

  • @mikec3976
    @mikec3976 3 года назад

    Gives new meaning to ‘silent, but deadly’

  • @terrorcop101
    @terrorcop101 3 года назад

    People always talk about the consequences of miscommunication, but this is the first time I've ever heard of mis-bodily functions.

  • @rheinbewachen1211
    @rheinbewachen1211 3 года назад

    Imagine the headline
    Krell diplomat nearly dies from toxic human farts, new protocols enacted:

    • @AgroSquerril
      @AgroSquerril  3 года назад

      a new form off assassination would be born , a shart in the dark

  • @BYERE
    @BYERE 3 года назад +2

    I figured it was going to be something the Krell ate... I guess I was half right xD

  • @ShiKageMaru
    @ShiKageMaru 2 года назад

    I'm proud to say I guessed the solutiob within the first 20 seconds.

  • @Sammy-forgetaboutit-Tony
    @Sammy-forgetaboutit-Tony 3 года назад

    The conflict of the intergalactic texmex farts...

  • @Monster_Ink
    @Monster_Ink 3 года назад +2

    🤣🤣🤣
    That's one heck of an accident! XD
    For the algorithm!

  • @yourfriendlyneighborhoodtr2331
    @yourfriendlyneighborhoodtr2331 3 года назад

    Finally
    Gru’s fart gun can do some damage

  • @punkabooiscool1111
    @punkabooiscool1111 3 года назад +2

    Ah (other word for manure) here we go again

  • @gammaspector
    @gammaspector 3 года назад +2

    Good I love Tex mex dishes

  • @victoriasteichen122
    @victoriasteichen122 2 года назад

    I was half expecting it to be capsaicin

  • @Delgen1951
    @Delgen1951 3 года назад

    Ah well wars have been started or worst things, some guys ear, some dudes noise, a bucket, stolen cow, a lost soccer game..

  • @WiredTurkey316
    @WiredTurkey316 3 года назад +1

    For the Beano!

  • @noahkleugh9323
    @noahkleugh9323 2 года назад

    A monster butt quake almost ends the world!

  • @Terran.Marine.2
    @Terran.Marine.2 4 месяца назад

    "Dropped a butt quake"😂😂😂

  • @VadulTharys
    @VadulTharys 3 года назад

    OMG I spewed coffee everywhere, that was EPIC!!!

  • @infernowolf05
    @infernowolf05 3 года назад

    God, imagine farting so bad you nearly start a war

    • @nicholashernandez4611
      @nicholashernandez4611 3 года назад

      Given enough first contact scenarios, this is almost guaranteed to happen at some point. If it doesn’t lead to war, it will be hilarious.

  • @ironworksdragon6843
    @ironworksdragon6843 3 года назад +2

    Draconic bob

  • @dkau7029
    @dkau7029 9 месяцев назад

    i love this story i get tears from laughing so freaking hard. i have herd it twice and this is something i can picture happening in real life. well, if we ever got to the stars for real.

  • @AlanMyronPrivate
    @AlanMyronPrivate Год назад

    Silent but deathly has a whole new meaning. now. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @seandees3028
    @seandees3028 3 года назад

    I needed that laugh! Thank you!

  • @stevemeisky8409
    @stevemeisky8409 3 года назад

    So now I know of two stories of humans causing major diplomatic incidents with aliens by farting.

  • @chaosfriedeggz6014
    @chaosfriedeggz6014 3 года назад +1

    Farts
    Silent but deadly

    • @AgroSquerril
      @AgroSquerril  3 года назад +1

      in space no one can hear you...

  • @radioactiveassassin5218
    @radioactiveassassin5218 3 года назад

    I knew it was fart from the beginning, but it was still hilarious, mainly from 18:40

  • @BazilRat
    @BazilRat 2 года назад

    Of all the bad times to step on a duck, it couldn't have happened to a nicer guy.
    Also, nice 20-minute fart joke.

  • @TheAussief1
    @TheAussief1 3 года назад

    A genuine silent but deadly.

  • @sean900fps
    @sean900fps 2 года назад

    ass-blasted an alien laughed outloud tears in my eyes . thank you good job

  • @jakoblopez5691
    @jakoblopez5691 5 месяцев назад

    Warning the humans have the ass-blaster 9000 I repeat the humans have the ass-blaster 9000

  • @derrickbarney8731
    @derrickbarney8731 3 года назад

    Thought it was going to be from the hole that food goes in, not from where it comes out! xD

  • @brianmeadows1137
    @brianmeadows1137 8 дней назад

    Liked this before but I'll Like it again.

  • @TheSonicfanx1
    @TheSonicfanx1 3 года назад

    Krell bathrooms and human bathrooms are to have entirely separate ventilation systems

  • @CRONNOS95
    @CRONNOS95 3 года назад +1

    I love that this is hilarious and also a legitimate problem if we ever meet aliens and they come from a different atmosphere

    • @AgroSquerril
      @AgroSquerril  3 года назад +2

      glad you enjoyed

    • @alganhar1
      @alganhar1 2 года назад

      Not sure, probably not the methane to be honest as it would be present anywhere there is something like plant life as some amount is given off with decomposition. Also any organisms evolving in a similar atmo to Earths would probably be Oxygen breathers, so again would likely produce some in the digestive process. Something like sulphur dioxide maybe though, that may be more feasible, and its small amounts of that gas that gives certain bottom explosions distinctive.... aroma's!

  • @bubbyscott7064
    @bubbyscott7064 3 года назад +5

    Argo squirril should read some DnD (aka dungeons & dragons) story's because of his voice and he actually gets into reading it unlike other people who read it but constantly put their ads in the story's books and novals that people make on the internet and squirril doesn't do that at least he does it when at the beginning after intro or at the end I can understand the reason why it's at the beginning or the end and I respect that

    • @furycarnategaming
      @furycarnategaming 3 года назад +1

      He does read fantasy in the same vein as dnd, like ars magica and scifi fantasy.

    • @AgroSquerril
      @AgroSquerril  3 года назад

      Check out the Genre of Litrpg , some are actually based of the DnD ruleset

  • @JKC40
    @JKC40 Год назад

    i thought it was going to be the LT's perfume.

  • @justacook6858
    @justacook6858 3 года назад

    Wow that was early Federation days
    Replace the old man's voice with an overactive Captain Kirk.

  • @redraptorx1066
    @redraptorx1066 3 года назад +2

    well that stinks.

  • @x1tekja
    @x1tekja 6 месяцев назад

    He cropdusted them into a coma😂😂

  • @peterhall8572
    @peterhall8572 3 месяца назад

    Imagine the results of a skin full of lager and a vindaloo 😅

  • @chrissoto7187
    @chrissoto7187 3 года назад

    Lol 😂 farts 💨 nearly started an interstellar war.

  • @davidhenderson3400
    @davidhenderson3400 2 года назад

    I had better stay off the Krell home world. I could wipe out the whole planet, I am a walking methane generator.

  • @additiveartificer9365
    @additiveartificer9365 2 года назад

    I know what happening when I heard Tex Mex

  • @triplejjj6633
    @triplejjj6633 3 года назад +1

    Ha haha 😄. Interstellar gas attack 🤣.

  • @markojotic
    @markojotic Год назад

    I am saddened to learn that there are Karens in our future.

  • @dalesands1291
    @dalesands1291 Год назад

    I like these stories of things happening because of basic human biology but yet the end result is deadly to aliens. Who would have thought you really can kill with a fart.

  • @DEMONOFLOVEANDDEATH
    @DEMONOFLOVEANDDEATH 3 года назад

    Bless the Squerril

  • @yomogami4561
    @yomogami4561 2 года назад

    lol
    that wasn't what i was expecting

  • @Sephiroth391
    @Sephiroth391 3 года назад

    Perhaps it's just me but seeing title made me think of lost pause

  • @StaK_1980
    @StaK_1980 3 года назад

    OK, damn, I'm happy that I'm in a home office setup. Otherwise this would have been really awkward to explain my co-workers. :-)