This does not reason for me in the case of a child. A child victim of narcissistic abuse will reject the healthy parent. But the child actually needs this parent. This child do belong in our live, whatever how hard he/she rejects it. Never push away a child when he rejects.
One of my favorite myths; The scorpion wanted to cross the water, but he did not know how to swim. He sees the frog, a brilliant swimmer, and offers to take him on his back so that they can cross together. The frog hesitates, saying: "but if I take you on me, you might sting me!" The scorpion is offended and replies: "if I sting you and you die, we'll both sink together." The frog thinks again, is convinced, puts the scorpion on him and they enter the stream. Suddenly and while they are somewhere halfway, the scorpion stings him. And while the frog cools off and they both begin to sink, he asks the scorpion: "Why?" And he replies: "It couldn't be otherwise! IT'S IN MY NATURE..."
I told a friend who was going through a break-up. " You're not rejected, you're rescued! ". That is how I have always felt. We should not give power to those who deserve it the least. ✌❤🖖 G
Rejection is rejection.every sane person has to accept that it can happen to anywone and move on, not become toxic and insist on somebody who doesn't like or want to get close to you.Toxic is the one who gets obsessed on the person that rejected him,not being able to accept,move on and be in peace if one person rejects him,and focus on persons who pay attention to you and are intereset.you cannot force somewone to like you or want you
Let’s be honest: rejection is only a big deal if it comes after substantial investment and feeling deeply accepted by the person. How are we supposed to figure out how to avoid THAT situation before it happens?
Great video! The take it or leave it proposition mindset really sums it up. All attempts to change yourself in order to gain others approval are really a short sighted strategy that only causes more stress and problems.
Professor Sam thanks for the video but please furnish us with more indepth insights and solutions for the issue of rejection...i will be so very grateful
I partially agree with this, but if you reject someone because you have a bad gut feeling about them and there are red flags that pop up for you, I don't think you're stupid or losing out on anything. You can't experience loss if you don't value something/someone, right? It is ultimately about you indeed because you simply wish to protect yourself or know that you wouldn't mesh well with the person in question. That's just an example. There are many reasons for rejection and ways to do it. It's not necessarily always a bad thing if people can communicate effectively in my opinion. Unfortunately, I think a lot of people cannot communicate effectively, myself included at times. 😅
Right. People suck at boundaries. Really really. Thats what all the freaking out is about ultimately: lazy sloppy boundaries and then blaming other people.
Questions : What happens when covert borderline consumes sadistic supply ? How psychopathic narcissist behaves in shared fantasy and how to mortifying him/her? what was the childhood like for him/her? did they transition to psychopathy in childhood? how his cold empathy works in particular because of his overactive psychopathic self state? appreciate a video
Could you someday make a video about episode 2 of season 1 of "In Threatment" (2008) and analyze the dialogue from the perspective of the therapist and the client? I think narcissistic personality disorder is well described there.
Rejection and pure evil from a parent makes future rejections from others even more hurtful, self image damaged in the nest, i know i can muster the trust needed but not handle the strong reaction if that trust is broken, it's like oversensitive scar tissue. I build and destroy in one single sweep, am i in the middle of a labyrinth or is the labyrinth in me?
Also… it’s so easy to “hurt” other people these days. Like can we please get a scientific or legal definition of “hurt”…. so it’s not just a bunch of overly delicate people making up the rules all the time. I once had such a person in all seriousness tell me that if I want the relationship I just have to do whatever they tell me to do. Like…. Ok…. I get it that some people are messed up and have bizarre triggers but…. We do need to objectively draw the line at some point so that the emotions of damaged people are not running the world. Ya? Like say… if it wouldn’t legitimately hurt 90% of people then let’s just all agree to not care… so the 10% remaining can figure out that they just need to get over themselves.
Rejection is a way to show us that person doesn’t belong in our life. ❤
This does not reason for me in the case of a child.
A child victim of narcissistic abuse will reject the healthy parent. But the child actually needs this parent.
This child do belong in our live, whatever how hard he/she rejects it.
Never push away a child when he rejects.
One of my favorite myths; The scorpion wanted to cross the water, but he did not know how to swim. He sees the frog, a brilliant swimmer, and offers to take him on his back so that they can cross together. The frog hesitates, saying: "but if I take you on me, you might sting me!" The scorpion is offended and replies:
"if I sting you and you die, we'll both sink together." The frog thinks again, is convinced, puts the scorpion on him and they enter the stream. Suddenly and while they are somewhere halfway, the scorpion stings him. And while the frog cools off and they both begin to sink, he asks the scorpion: "Why?" And he replies: "It couldn't be otherwise! IT'S IN MY NATURE..."
I told a friend who was going through a break-up. " You're not rejected, you're rescued! ". That is how I have always felt. We should not give power to those who deserve it the least. ✌❤🖖 G
Well said
Rejection is rejection.every sane person has to accept that it can happen to anywone and move on, not become toxic and insist on somebody who doesn't like or want to get close to you.Toxic is the one who gets obsessed on the person that rejected him,not being able to accept,move on and be in peace if one person rejects him,and focus on persons who pay attention to you and are intereset.you cannot force somewone to like you or want you
If we all thought this way, we would all be happier .
Let’s be honest: rejection is only a big deal if it comes after substantial investment and feeling deeply accepted by the person. How are we supposed to figure out how to avoid THAT situation before it happens?
Sam saving the day - again.
Most people do reject me my father rejected me at age 16 and I became schizoid personality disorder so I'm used to rejection thank you doctor Sam
Thank you, my magical thinking can get the better of me sometimes.
This was the set-you-straight "Dad" talking-to that I needed tonight. Toda raba, Dr Vaknin.
this is a great post I have taken to saying it is their loss not mine and move on, difficult that it may be
Great video! The take it or leave it proposition mindset really sums it up. All attempts to change yourself in order to gain others approval are really a short sighted strategy that only causes more stress and problems.
Needed this this morning Professor. Thank you!
Another video I needed to watch!! Being rejected by my narcissist is so hard on my self esteem...
I do reject people who go over my boundaries. When they think that I am their property. And than they feel hurt. Difficult...
Maybe you should stop leading people on?
I consider myself as a "complicated" person. Unfortunately, I met someone who combined "toxic+complicated", at the same time.
He rejected me. 😁
Professor Sam thanks for the video but please furnish us with more indepth insights and solutions for the issue of rejection...i will be so very grateful
I partially agree with this, but if you reject someone because you have a bad gut feeling about them and there are red flags that pop up for you, I don't think you're stupid or losing out on anything. You can't experience loss if you don't value something/someone, right? It is ultimately about you indeed because you simply wish to protect yourself or know that you wouldn't mesh well with the person in question. That's just an example. There are many reasons for rejection and ways to do it. It's not necessarily always a bad thing if people can communicate effectively in my opinion. Unfortunately, I think a lot of people cannot communicate effectively, myself included at times. 😅
Right. People suck at boundaries. Really really. Thats what all the freaking out is about ultimately: lazy sloppy boundaries and then blaming other people.
😅😅😊 farrrkkk me 😂your little boy humour at the start. Your peer’s left eyeball must be twitching 😁
Thank you so much Dear Professor Sam Vaknin❤
Thank you Dr. Vaknin.
Thank you so much Dear Professor ❤
Thank you Sam❤ I really needed to hear this😊
Questions :
What happens when covert borderline consumes sadistic supply ?
How psychopathic narcissist behaves in shared fantasy and how to mortifying him/her?
what was the childhood like for him/her? did they transition to psychopathy in childhood?
how his cold empathy works in particular because of his overactive psychopathic self state?
appreciate a video
So beautifully put ❤
Thank you Professor
Thank you uncle Sam
This was brilliant. Thankyou.
Very helpful video, thank you.
Thank you for this
Excellent!
Thank you 🙏💖
Thank you!
Perfect!
Thanks so much ❤😊
@Whatap-vaknin OK how do we stay in touch thanks
Laughing is good medicine! Your intro: 🤭😁
Could you someday make a video about episode 2 of season 1 of "In Threatment" (2008) and analyze the dialogue from the perspective of the therapist and the client? I think narcissistic personality disorder is well described there.
rejected by my children and so by default, my grandchildren😭
Rejection and pure evil from a parent makes future rejections from others even more hurtful, self image damaged in the nest, i know i can muster the trust needed but not handle the strong reaction if that trust is broken, it's like oversensitive scar tissue. I build and destroy in one single sweep, am i in the middle of a labyrinth or is the labyrinth in me?
Also… it’s so easy to “hurt” other people these days. Like can we please get a scientific or legal definition of “hurt”…. so it’s not just a bunch of overly delicate people making up the rules all the time. I once had such a person in all seriousness tell me that if I want the relationship I just have to do whatever they tell me to do. Like…. Ok…. I get it that some people are messed up and have bizarre triggers but…. We do need to objectively draw the line at some point so that the emotions of damaged people are not running the world. Ya? Like say… if it wouldn’t legitimately hurt 90% of people then let’s just all agree to not care… so the 10% remaining can figure out that they just need to get over themselves.
Thank you a lot
Pease visit the US
Spelling errors are not a sign of rejection
npd uncle
Thank you ❤️